#ofmd headcanons | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bowieandqueen11 · 1 year

Text

Dating Frenchie Would Include...

Request: Hi, May I please request some headcanons of what dating Frenchie (Our Flag Means Death) would include, please? Thank you so much!! 🖤

Of course my darling, here you go!!

Warning: a little strong language! Also I wrote this at 3 a.m. so it may be unintelligible 🏳️‍🌈

(I do not own OFMD or any of its characters, all rights go to creators. Gif credit goes to @crucifiix.)

☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°

Lmao love a bit of fanfiction about Frenchie big fan

You are 100% the only other crew member, or the only other anybody in fact, that Frenchie allows into his room. Far too many times have you been caught sitting side saddled over Frenchie’s lap by Wee John Feeney, stroking the bottom of his beard and giggling as the two of you bump foreheads and continue talking shit about the newly crowned ‘Dizzy Izzy’ (during a rough patch in the storm that had raged earlier that night, he had accidentally tumbled after a large pitch into Lucius’ lap, and by golly was he not letting anyone forget about it.) Wee John just sighs, walking straight back out and letting the door slam shut; the last thing you can hear as you try to stifle your laugh against the side of Frenchie’s neck is him calling you ‘the weirdest eejits’ he’s ever met. Neither of you are really paying attention though: your lips managed to accidentally rub against the tip of Frenchie’s collar bone, one of his more ticklish points, and the man was too busy apologising and trying to give you a hand up after accidentally flinging you to the floor.

After a lot of coaxing, a lot of fake pouting, and a lot of pecking forehead kisses to try and convince him round to the idea, he does eventually get used to the idea of you sleeping over as well! I feel like Frenchie is definitely a ‘leg over you like a mossy log that’s been stuck in a marshy bog for hundreds of years and hasn’t moved an inch in that entire time’ kind of sleeper. Like, the man is so tall that on your single shared bed you’re lying properly on it as the bottom layer, and then Frenchie is playing a game of Tetris with his limbs over you during the night. Usually it ends up with his head dipped down and tucked up all neat and cosy against the side of your cheek, his snores resonating loudly enough through the walls of the ship that they could have invented the foghorn right there and then, and his left leg splayed completely over your midriff.

If you get too uncomfortable and give him a shove he will eventually roll over and curl up like an armadillo so you can spoon him though. That is, if one of you hasn’t managed to shove the other out of the bed first - it’s a common occurrence for Wee John to wake Frenchie up from where he’s half lying under the bed, but even though he’s got aching shoulders from spending half the night rolling about the wood he’s still all smiles and doe eyes at you when he sees you’re awake too. Like a Jack in the box, he pops up over the side of the bed with a smile bright enough to make even the crystal dawn of the sea pale by comparison, and presses a kiss against the tip of your nose before skipping off. He’s so sweet your honour I actually cannot with this man.

Sometimes he likes to talk before the two of you fall asleep. Before he’s splayed out like a starfish, the two of you lie in the cot side by side and just fiddle with each other’s fingers on the pillow. Noses close enough to rub against each other if you dared to move a hare and legs pulled up in a half-sit so they can rest familiarly against each other, Frenchie relishes and relaxes in the knowledge that there’s someone on this ship that will know his story. That there’s someone left in the world that’s even willing to hear it, to care about him, and not just what he can do for them. There’s a poignant wistfulness to the air, to his words, so much so that from time to time he can’t even meet your eye. He still always flashes you that shy, optimistic smile from time to time, but you can see the past in the wrinkles of his face every time he uncomfortably starts to recoil when you press your palm to his cheek.

Not going to lie, he may not be a visual artist to rival the mastery of Lucius, but you can bet your sandy ass that Frenchie has pinned up the walls some doodles he’s drawn of you in his spare time, with parchment that he tore out and ‘borrowed’ from Stede’s diary. When Stede collected the crew on the deck a few days later and had a ‘team meeting’ about why stealing was wrong, Frenchie gave a very convincing shrug and ‘it wasn’t me’ frown when Stede asked who had taken the paper. I mean, he was always bound to find out, and when he did stumble into Frenchie and Wee John’s room the next afternoon to borrow his lute (he was planning to write a song for Blackbeard to convince him he was more of a catch than Calico Jack don’t even ask), he only smiled fondly and shut the door when he spotted what his diary had been used for. (And secretly hoped that Ed wouldn’t find his own doodles of him in said diary lmao.)

Oooh, can you imagine how lovely it would be to stumble through Stede’s secret tunnel and to go sit out by unicorn figurehead with Frenchie?? Just the two of you, feet swinging together through the planks, the swirling pockets of silver dancing over the warm tides and the comforting buzz of Frenchie’s voice as he sings for you. With your head resting on his shoulder, you’re too busy falling into a blissful oblivion to even notice that Frenchie’s stopped picking at the strings of his lute, and has instead set it down at his side. He’s found that a much better use of his time would be staring at you, so obviously, so fondly, so sweetly: as if dewdrops hung from his lips, ready for the northern dawn that only your splendour could bring.

Getting to tie that cute little cravat around his neck before the five of you jump ship to go to that fancy dinner party. Every time you try to loop the end of it back through he chases your fingers (to try and kiss them or bite them, you’re not entirely sure), but it does make the two of you burst out into another fit of giggles.

Although he has quite a sweet disposition, Frenchie is 100% ready to throw hands for you. The whole time he’s trying to crank up Oluwande’s ‘pyramid scheme’, he has one eye on the valuables being handed over and one trained solely on you. If any of the esteemed and highly respectable guests become a little too eager, coltish, agitated, Frenchie is straight on it. Before you can even knock their wig off, he’s grabbed your wrist and pulled you either behind his back or dragged you out to the hull with the sternest expression you’ve ever seen on his face. Either way, he’ll always put himself in the firing line of harm’s way first, if it means protecting you.

The two of you spend about 70% of your time singing together on deck. Frenchie’s jamming along with his lute, and you’re animatedly singing and dancing around him, often roping in Lucius to come do full body jigs or a ridiculing minuet Frenchie’s intensifying sea shanties. Since the three of you were supposed to be finishing Izzy’s order to mop the deck, he’s sitting cross legged on the helm behind your spinning bodies, with enough steam coming out of his crimson ears to drown the sky in thunderclouds.

During crew meetings he’ll just straight up wander in late and just... come up behind you and plop his chin down on top of your head. He won’t listen to a word of what’s going on either: too busy chatting with you, or with Jim, or fiddling with the rings on your fingers, or just trying to figure out if the stain on the ceiling looks more like an orange or a fish. To be honest he didn’t even realise it was a meeting until Stede asked him if he was paying attention - he just saw you and immediately came to seek out your heat (and also your hugs).

His love language is doing and making things with his hands, so instead of doing actual work to help out on the Revenge, he tries to craft for you. He sits by the mast, cross legged, and with his tongue sticking from the corner of his mouth in the uttermost form of concentration. He’s trying to remember how his ma taught him to thread a needle, so desperate to fix up your shirt properly after Spanish Jackie nearly tore the sleeve to shreds during your first meeting at the Republic of Pirates. Of course, you’ll eventually have to free him from where he’s managed to sew his shirt to his jacket (very well, might I add). He smiles all the while, leaning down to gently kiss your knuckles every time they bump up high enough with a new thread of the string to be within his reaching distance.

He likes to steal Wee John’s old hammock - he’s a big fan of having snuggled up naps on deck while Ed and Stede have stopped off at some new island and are busy off smooching on their foliage walks.

Or, he likes to venture out sometimes too and see someplace new with the love of his life! Usually it’s just some slightly different variation of a beach, but this just allows him ample opportunity to perform his favourite activity: scooping up wet sand and hurling at you in a mock sand-ball fight. The two of you fly across the streaking honey-gold boughs of the winding branches of the strip, Frenchie rolling his trousers up and finally catching up to you between the torn crags and cliff edges. He jumps, flying full sail through the air until he’s knocked both of you to the ground. He tries to be all romantic and pretend he hasn’t just knocked the ever loving wind out of you. He leans over you, crawling his knees up between your thighs and slowly dipping down to kiss you, before getting bashed up the face by a huge tide and falling ass over teakettle backwards in sweet revenge lmao.

#our flag means death #ofmd #ofmd imagine #frenchie #david jenkins #frenchie imagine #frenchie x reader #our flag means imagine #frenchie headcanons #frenchie ofmd #frenchie ofmd imagine #joel fry #ofmd headcanons #our flag means death headcanons #x reader

195 notes · View notes

cowplant-ink · 6 months

Text

Modern OFMD Headcanons: Jobs/Hobbies

Stede - Obviously runs a hotel with his boyfriend Ed. Does a lot of work at the front desk.

Volunteers at the library and reads to kids (may have been told off once or twice for being too loud and working the kids up too much.)

Ed - Obviously runs a hotel with his boyfriend Stede. I feel like he does a bit of everything around the hotel, like he's never in one place, one minute he's helping out the catering staff, the next he's in his office doing paperwork and then off having a chat with random guests. He just wants the hotel to be successful.

Not really a hobby, but loves taking Stede to the aquarium for little dates when they have the time.

Frenchie - Lives in a van, and plays small gigs at random bars/clubs when he can. Busks in the daytime.

I feel like his van isn't neat, but also, not messy, like it's organized in his own messy way.

Jim - For some reason, I feel like Jim, Archie and Oulwande go along with Frenchie on his gigs, maybe to help set up and all that, and also just to cheer him on. (Frenchie groupies, lmao, jk.)

Also does special effects make-up, loves to practice on Archie

Archie: Just wants to be near Jim, but she also loves the nightlife, bars, clubs, anything and she's there, as long is Jim with her, of course.

Zheng - Runs a soup kitchen in her spare time with Auntie. Loves to go along with Oulwande to Frenchie's gigs.

Oulwande - Volunteers at said soup kitchen as much as possible, when he's not with Jim and Archie.

Lucius - Is an artist, basically lives at the local art studio. Loves to just sit at the park and sketch.

Black Pete - Works as a welder or locksmith. Always bringing home small gifts for Lucius when he finishes work.

Wee John - Is a tattoo artist by day and a drag queen at night. Maybe he does a little bar-tending here and there.

Izzy - I get fitness vibes, idk, possibly owns a gym, does a little personal trainer work, but had to slow down a bit after losing his leg. One time while getting tattooed by Wee John heard about his drag shows and went and saw one just out of curiosity and fell in love with drag right then and there.

Spanish Jackie - Runs a nightclub with her bartender husband, The Swede.

Buttons - Is a fisherman with a small boat of his own. Keeps pigeons, and has named all of them. Would live in the enclosure with them if he could. Also likes to befriend stray pigeons

Roach - Is a line cook at a small diner, and sometimes sleeps in the diner when he doesn't pay rent at his apartment (I feel like he forgets sometimes.)

#ofmd #our flag means death #ofmd headcanons #modern ofmd #modern our flag means death #ofmd stede #ofmd ed #ofmd frenchie #ofmd jim #ofmd archie #ofmd zheng yi sao #ofmd oluwande #ofmd lucius #ofmd black pete #ofmd izzy #ofmd wee john #ofmd spanish jackie #ofmd buttons #ofmd roach

33 notes · View notes

thescarvedinsect · 7 months

Text

If Talk Like a Pirate Day existed in OFMD, I imagine that Stede and Ed would have the crew talk like other crewmates for the day, intending it as a fun roleplay, but almost everyone would just start doing Izzy impressions to annoy him.

#don't worry the spanish aren't chasing them this time #our flag means death #ofmd #i was not paid or sponsored in any way to post this #joke headcanon #talk like a pirate day #ofmd headcanons #international talk like a pirate day

31 notes · View notes

sky-fire-forever · 8 days

Text

I've been thinking of some system Ed ideas because I'm a system and I think it's a neat concept

The Kraken is not an alter at all. He's just a persona both Ed and Blackbeard put on. He's not separate from either of them and is the mask both of them use to hide their softer sides.

Ed/Edward: The host. His sense of identity is very dubious at best. He's the sadist of the system. The one who "loves a good maim" and who played knife parade and who enjoys violence to a degree. Not killing, though. He never takes it far enough to be the one doing the killing. That hurts too much. Reminds him too much of killing his father. Ed is easily bored and wants new things, new experiences. But he doesn't necessarily want to retire or be a normal person. He just wants something exciting in new way. Ed is who falls in love with Stede, head over heels. He loves how new and exciting Stede is, all the little things that make Stede so bizarre are what endear Ed to him. He loves him so much. Ed is often erratic and has changing moods that fluctuate, but at his core, he's a man who wants new things and who can get extremely depressed when he doesn't have proper enrichment

Blackbeard: The pragmatic "strategic genius" of the system. Surprisingly the less sadistic one out of him and Ed, but also the one more likely to kill, directly or indirectly. Blackbeard is the one who comes up with the plans, who sees the best way forward. He's actually a pretty quiet guy, but he's prideful. He takes a great deal of pride in the execution of his plans especially. He cares about what others think about him a lot more than Ed does. He doesn't particularly love Stede, especially not when compared to Ed. He honestly thinks he kinda gets in the way. He's the one who manipulates Izzy into sticking around, who pulls the strings, who really thinks he can kill Stede like he plans to. But he also needs Izzy a lot more than Ed thinks they do. He will sacrifice anything and anyone to achieve his goals, though.

Jeff: Yes, Jeff is a headmate. He's the one who yearns for an out of piracy. He's a trauma holder and resents how much anger is inside of him. He just wants to be a normal person living an idyllic life outside of piracy and violence, but finds himself to be incapable of it. He's prone to lashing out, to fits of violence, especially when he's reminded of all he isn't permitted to be. He just wants to retire, to run an inn, to be an accountant, anything but the life he feels trapped in. He hates who he is and everything he's made to be.

Pip: Pip is a child alter in the system. He's probably around the age of ten to fourteen and he's actually pretty violent. He's full of anger at how his life has turned out, at who he is, at all he's suffered from. He's angry at the injustice of it all, so he lashes out with words or actions. Lashing out makes him feel more in control in a world he feels helpless in. He hates feeling powerless, so he'll do anything to assert control over any situation he's in. He doesn't ever want to be helpless or small.

Eve: Eve splits when Stede leaves and the Kraken Era begins. She is actually the least violent of all the headmates and is the "perfect wife" the system thinks Stede wants. The perfect partner, soft and gentle and sweet. She wouldn't hurt a fly and she tries to take of her crew, especially from Ed, who keeps lashing out at them. She wants to be gentle and nurturing and kind, but often fails in the execution because she doesn't fully know what she's doing. She borrows a lot of traits from Ed's mother.

#our flag means death #ofmd #ofmd headcanons #edward teach #system headcanon

7 notes · View notes

stedebonnit · 1 year

Text

I cant decide if Stede can really swim or not. I go back and forth on this CONSTANTLY.

Because, of course, Stede grew up rich. He had all the privilege to learn to swim as a child. That said, knowing his father I'm also not convinced that he would get someone to teach Stede properly. He'd be the "throw him in the deep end and force him to find he way out" type of dad. So maybe Stede can kind of swim, but not well.

Now, we have some evidence that he can swim. In episode 8 he suggests "going for a dip", but who's to say he actually wanted to swim - they were near the beach after all, and maybe he just wanted to wade in where he could still walk.

Now, I know some of you may be thinking "but he chose to go out to sea, of course he can swim!"

And to that I argue, isnt that the MOST Stede Bonnet thing to do? To go out to live at sea without knowing anything more than a basic doggy paddle?

In conclusion, I don't know if Stede can swim, but I think it would be incredibly hilarious and in character if he couldn't, and could also open the door to some fun angst or comedy, depending on the route you want to take.

#ofmd #our flag means death #stede bonnet #ofmd headcanons #d speaks #mine

129 notes · View notes

bougiebutchbitch · 4 months

Text

one last morning cumquat

you cannot convince me that Stede 'surprising bloodlust' Bonnet didn't earn his red wings with Izzy Hands (and he got really, really into it)

#Izzy staggers out completely MAULED between his thighs #stizzy #izzy hands #gentlehands #stede bonnet #not just menstrual blood that's a-drippin #ofmd headcanons #they fuck filthy and Izzy is consistently overwhelmed/furious/horrified by how much he loves it

13 notes · View notes

theclaravoyant · 6 months

Text

AN ~ the horsegirl!stede ficlet literally nobody asked for <3 i'm in deep friends. fluffy fluffy deep. with a healthy side of ed and his hearteyeson for competent!stede bc same

Now on AO3 (part of the Petrified Orange 'verse)

Garnet

“... and we should probably get… some kind of horse, I guess.” Ed scratched the back of his neck and cast his eyes around. He wasn’t even sure where one would get such a thing. He’d never had the need.

“To the yards, then!” Stede picked a direction and strode off boldly. It had been a long day, but if there was one thing he didn’t mind a long day of, it was shopping. Admittedly it was a bit less indulgent on a twine budget but there was something to be said for the additional challenge of optimising every purchase for the best possible form, function and economy. He could tell Ed’s enthusiasm was flagging, but his own only grew as the sights and sounds and hell, even the smell of the livestock sales yards came into view.

“Oh, look at them, Ed! Aren’t they beautiful?” he cried, rushing forward to greet a couple of snuffling nostrils.

“I dunno.” Ed said skeptically, eyeing up the bony creature that was currently making Stede’s acquaintance. “They look pretty rough to me.”

“Nonsense.” Looking around at their options, Stede had to concede, maybe not complete nonsense. “Alright, the pickings might be a bit slim. But you know what they say about roughness and diamonds.”

Diamonds was a strong word. And Ed knew fuck all about finding them, at least when it came to horses. Fortunately, Stede had been around the block enough to pick out the animals of the most sound health and fine breeding their budget could muster. He settled on a chestnut mare with a white strip and just enough cold blood in her to make her head big and her shoulders strong. Light on her feet, but up for the long trips to and from town and even pulling a small cart, he imagined.

“Plus,” Stede added. “She has the most darling eyes, don’t you think?”

Ed didn’t know anything about frogs or gullets, but at least that, he could agree on. She looked… sweet. Patient. He’d never noticed horses had eyelashes before. Never really been this close to one for this long. She was kind of beautiful, wasn’t she? Huh.

Stede’s expectant expression broke out into a grin.

“I knew you’d like her! Now, where is Mr Phillips…”

He zeroed in immediately on the vendor. Ed watched as his confidence bloomed, gesturing over to where he stood with the horse. Her ears twitched. Ed nudged her.

“This is going to be good, watch.”

She was more interested in nuzzling his hand in case of a stray piece of apple or other, but Ed was enraptured by Stede. He loved a good haggle, did Stede, and as it turned out he was quite good at it too when he felt confident in what he was talking about. He scarcely let on how head-over-heels he could be when it came to saving living creatures from uncertain fates, especially ones with big doleful eyes, and instead executed the fine balance between praising the man’s wares and insisting upon discounts for every fault with a finesse Ed neither knew nor often bothered with. It had come in handy more than once now that not just one but both of them had recently become… uh, lower on the wealth.

With a delighted cry and a handshake, Stede declared that they’d struck a deal - not just for the horse, but some simple feed and tack and a cart to take it all home with. Loved a good haggle, did Stede.

“There we are!” he announced, returning triumphant as if he hadn’t just finessed all but the shirt off the poor Mr Phillips’ back. “You’re coming home with us, girl. Perhaps not a diamond, but I’d say at least a very fine garnet, don’t you think?”

#stede bonnet #blackbonnet #gentlebeard #ofmd #our flag means death #ofmd fanfic #ofmd headcanons #clara's fic tag #the petrified orange inn verse

10 notes · View notes

shiplessoceans · 2 years

Text

They had to be sitting down for the first kiss because otherwise Stede would have swooned like a fair maiden from an Austen novel and fallen ass over tea-kettle.

#ofmd #our flag means death #stede bonnet #ofmd headcanons #is it even a headcanon if it's the truth?

1K notes · View notes

itswhatyougive · 6 months

Text

Headcanon (or. How I Made Sense of the S2 Finale):

After Izzy's death, Stede underestimated the grief of the crew and tried to act like everything was business as usual.

After an especially insensitive comment, Frenchie chewed out Stede for coming up with such a stupid plan that cost Izzy his life.

Ed tried to come to Stede's defense, but Frenchie finally stood up to Ed and dressed him down entirely, telling him he didn't get a say because of all the abuse he put Izzy through in life.

The crew were so impressed that they unanimously voted for Ed and Stede to leave the ship and Frenchie to become captain

#this would also explain why they didn't choose olu to be captain this time around #and the circumstances around stede.and ed becoming inkeepers #even after ed said 'he guessed' he wanted revenge for izzy #it would also show that izzy may have wanted it to be true that the crew loved ed #but they in fact still harbored many resentments #and if they voted one of the co-captains off the ship #the other would follow either way #this would also show they had some resentments toward stede as well in s2 #maybe they would even acknowledge that it wasn't a 'safe space ship“ as long as stede enabled ed #so they both had to go #anyeay yeah #i want the revenge crew to have made the decision #ofmd headcanon #ofmd headcanons #ofmd hcs #ofmd hc #ofmd theory #ofmd s3 speculation #ofmd s2 finale #ofmd frenchie #frenchie ofmd #frenchie our flag means death #the crew of the revenge #crew of the revenge #the revenge crew #ofmd spoilers #ofmd s2 spoilers #ofmd season 2 spoilers #ofmd #our flag means death

17 notes · View notes

and-fishing-equipment · 2 years

Text

so i was thinking about ed's little cross tattoos and i was thinking. one of the crosses was ed's very first tattoo. after izzy saved his life in a raid for the first time, ed nagged him until he agreed to give him a tattoo to remind him of that day and what izzy has done for him. then a few months later, it happens again. and ed thinks it only makes sense to get a second one. just because it's happened before doesn't mean it's of any less meaning. so he talks izzy into giving him another one, just next to the first one. but then it happens again. and again. and soon his arm starts to fill up with all these little reminders of how he owes izzy his life, every time he looks in the mirror.

as the years go by they slowly begin to forget about their little tradition, occasionally remembering the times they still need to catch up on, until they eventually stop bringing it up at all. izzy thinks it's because ed doesn't value his services as much anymore. or maybe he's just forgotten about it. but izzy remembers. so clearly.

ed had, in fact, pushed the memory somewhere into the back of his head. that is, until one day stede asks him "what's the meaning behind all your tattoos?" he begins to explain how he got each of them, and as he gets to his arm he trails off, memories coming crashing back. it had been a really long time.

a week goes by but he can't stop thinking about it. he thinks about his time as the kraken, after stede left. he thinks about how he treated izzy, and how izzy still stayed with him. not only that, but he was the one who made sure ed didn't harm himself in his murder spree, who took care of the ship while ed was out of his mind in pain and made sure he didn't kill himself in his drunken mania. so he gets himself together.

he finds izzy looking out at the sea at the bow of the ship. stuttering and stumbling, he awkwardly expresses his gratitude, and even comes as close as they'll ever get to apologizing. and he asks izzy to give him one more tattoo.

#i'm soft don't talk to me #edward teach #izzy hands #israel hands #blackbeard #blackhands #our flag means death #ofmd #our flag means death headcanons #ofmd headcanons #gay pirate brainrot

125 notes · View notes