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tgcg · 4 months

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bad mouther, hole master

TG: kissing with tongue is gross as hell

CG: COME THE FUCK OFF IT.

TG: what

CG: I'M SAYING SHUT UP.

TG: oh

CG: IT'S NOT THAT WEIRD. IT'S LIKE THE NATURAL PROGRESSION OF REGULAR KISSING TO EVENTUALLY INCLUDE THAT. IF YOU HAD ANY SEMBLANCE OF ROMANCE GHOSTING THROUGH THE DEVOLVING REMNANTS OF YOUR THINKPAN YOU'D APPRECIATE WHAT IT BRINGS TO THE NUTRITION PLATFORM OF ANY CONSENTING CONCUPISCENT RELATIONSHIP!

TG: youre talking about it like its a goddamn military weapon or some shit

TG: some kinda scientific fuckin method to fondle a dudes mouth with your own mouth thats

TG: thats gross

TG: this isnt supposed to be a debate before fuckin congress on the pros and cons of getting your mack on

TG: its i would say a reasonably personal thing to react about and thats just my reaction man you dont gotta arbitrate it

TG: and like why the hell do they have to linger on it so long in these movies do they really want me to immerse myself in people necking each other that much

TG: roll the sounds around in my earholes like im swilling a fine fuckin wine

TG: well my professional opinion is that shit tastes and sounds mad gross and tbh i havent seen a single movie where it was close to being any kind of necessary

TG: its just a cringy waste of everyones time

CG: YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT, AND I DISAGREE WITH EVERYTHING THAT COMES OUT OF YOUR IGNORANCE GASH, YOU LUMP OF TIGHT-LIPPED CLUELESSNESS.

TG: did you just homestar me

CG: FOR THE SAKE OF ARGUMENT, SINCE YOU'RE APPARENTLY DESPERATE TO START SHIT WITH ME RIGHT NOW: HAVE YOU EVER EVEN DONE IT?

TG: hell no

CG: THANK YOU FOR PROVING MY POINT.

TG: proving your point--

TG: bro have uh

TG: have YOU???

CG: EXCUSE ME? HAVE I WHAT?

TG: come on

TG: i walked into this stupid conversation with a fucking shovel and by god am i digging myself a damn hole big and wide enough for every dave across time to squeeze in so i might as well get cosy in this shit before we all start collectively shoving dirt in our mouths

TG: bet your ass im taking you down with me though

TG: grab your spade and get digging man

CG: GRAB MY WHAT????????

TG: just tell me

CG: ???????!!!!!!!!

TG: karkat

CG: NO!

TG: f-

CG: WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM!!!!! WHAT PART OF "SHUT UP" DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND????

TG: wait no

TG: oh my god dude

TG: you can spin that shit all you want but you can do it the hell away from me

TG: i do not need to be hip to your weirdo foursquare fantasies

TG: patently not my business

CG: STOP RIGHT THERE. JUST SHUT IT. I AM PUTTING US OUT OF OUR MISERY RIGHT NOW. I AM CONDUCTING AN ACT OF MERCY ON THIS INSANE FUCKING CONVERSATION AND YOU ARE GOING TO ZIP YOUR LIPS AND TAKE IT.

CG: HERE IT IS: YOUR SINGLE OPPORTUNITY TO PRETEND YOU NEVER SAID THAT TO ME. I AM GOING TO FORGET YOU MADE A COMPLETE MOCKERY OF ME AND MY CULTURE THIS ONE TIME. AND LET YOU CONTINUE TO DIG YOUR STUPID, SHITTY HOLE.

CG: AND DAVE, I AM BEGGING YOU NOT TO WASTE IT.

CG: TO ANSWER YOUR SHOCKINGLY INAPPROPRIATE QUESTION, NO I HAVE NOT DONE IT.

CG: WHO GIVES A FLYING FUCK.

CG: HAPPY?

TG: ……..

TG: way to defuse the situation solid work

TG: real gold star effort grabbin that lit wick and blowing on it

TG: ok first of all you asked me first so dont act like im the one being a weirdo about this

TG: second of all i didnt mean it like that and you know it

TG: THIRD of all what the hell was the point of engaging the knightly theatrics then if you cant even verify that shit

CG: WELL FUCK, SORRY DAVE! I GUESS I'M JUST A FUCKING ROMANCE ENTHUSIAST! I GUESS I GIVE A MAJOR SHIT ABOUT THE THING YOU'RE OPENLY MOCKING TO MY FACE! IS THAT SO IMPOSSIBLE FOR YOU TO WRAP YOUR THOUGHT SPONGE AROUND?

CG: AND IT WAS COMPLETELY REASONABLE FOR ME TO ASK YOU THAT, YOU CONGEALED FETID NOOKSTAIN! MY STATUS ON THE MATTER HAS LITERALLY NOTHING TO DO WITH THE POINT EITHER OF US IS TRYING TO MAKE.

CG: TRY TO KEEP YOUR NUGBONE FROM CAVING IN ON ITSELF WHEN I DROP THIS BOMBSHELL: I'M ALLOWED TO HAVE OPINIONS ON THINGS I ACTUALLY KNOW ABOUT, EVEN IF I HAVEN'T DONE THEM! I DON'T JUST GO TROUNCING THE FUCK ABOUT LOBBING MY UNFOUNDED OPINIONS AT PEOPLE LIKE I KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT ANYTHING. UNLIKE SOMEONE WHO MAY OR MAY NOT BE INVOLVED IN THIS CONVERSATION WE'RE HAVING RIGHT NOW!

TG: youre

CG: I’M TALKING ABOUT YOU BY THE WAY. THE SOMEONE IS YOU.

TG: oh gimme a break

TG: bro youre going apeshit over something you havent even done

TG: you know what that sounds like to me it sounds like an overcompensating fake fan who doesnt get any

TG: you heard of troll napoleon complex

CG: AT LEAST I ACTUALLY FORMED MY OPINION BASED ON CAREFUL CONSIDERATION --

TG: -- oh yeah i bet huh

CG: -- INSTEAD OF JUST BANKING ON NUBJERK --

TG: -- not a real thing you just said

CG: -- REACTIONS AND WRINKLING MY SNIFF NUB AT ANY SIGNS OF GENUINE PHYSICAL INTIMACY!

TG: stop saying nub

CG: YOU EMOTIONALLY CONSTIPATED BULGEWAD

TG: not too much worse than being a perpetual fountain of emotional diarrhea

CG: DON'T YOU DARE.

CG: DON'T YOU DARE TRY TO USE THAT AS A "GOTCHA", YOU--… YOU! FUCK!

TG: dude did you actually run out of insults

TG: okay this is getting concerning

TG: youre the international dude of verbal dunks

TG: that can not be happening

CG: AAGHRJRGHJRGRHJAGHRJGRHJAGRHJRGRHJRGRHRJR

TG: you cant run out of em youre like the ultimate peddler of hate

CG: YOU DON'T THINK I'M CRITICALLY AWARE OF THE HOOFBEASTSHIT I'M SPEWING NIGH FUCKING CONSTANTLY?! I AM PAINFULLY COGNIZANT OF HOW MORONIC EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS IS!!!!

TG: feel like ive done some damage here

CG: ESPECIALLY MYSELF!

TG: alright bud time to calm down

CG: YOU CALM DOWN!!!!

TG: okay whatever!

CG: WHATEVER!!!!!!!!

TG: jeez

…

TG: here

…

CG: UGH.

TG: yeah

TG: really glad stuff like this happens in private

CG: YEAH. SAME HERE.

CG: JEGUS, CAN WE GO BACK TO BEFORE WE HAD THIS CONVERSATION? I DON'T ASK YOU MANY FAVORS, SO SURELY YOUR SLURRY OF ILL-DEFINED TIME POWERS CAN ALLOW YOU TO DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

CG: JUST LIKE, WIPE THAT WHOLE THING OFF THE SLATE.

CG: LET'S START OVER. SAY, FIVE MINUTES AGO. HOW DOES THAT SOUND?

TG: what conversation?

CG: OKAY, GOTCHA.

#davekat #dave strider #karkat vantas #homestuck #comix #bad mouther hole master

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weebsinstash · 8 months

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Babe! A new Helluva Boss episode just dropped! And Ozzie and Fizz are just so goddamn cute! 😍😭 and Ozzie is such a sweetheart! (I hope he’s genuinely such a softie and not playing an act, we need more softie demons).

Can we please talk about Yandere! Ozzie again? Pretty please with a shit ton of sprinkles on top? 🥺

Bestie thank youuuu I watched that shit immediately and I have so many thoughts

This episode actually shows a big reason why I haven't really published a lot for like, Ozzie or Valentino in terms of actual fics because, my take on Ozzie's personality based purely off his debut appearance would've been a lot more different and now we see that, bro he's, suave yeah, but also, a huge green flag lovable cinnamon roll dork??? Valentino, we only have seen so much of. To be honest the way he's been presented seems to sway from "scary as fuck during gangster business stuff" to "he's kind of a ratchet ho, actually" and I'm not, entirely super confident writing stuff for him because like, I'm more of, assuming? I can't, analyze his character like I can for other characters with more material out for them.

For real though, my current stance on this matter is: Asmodeus, you could go to him and ask for his knowledge and advice on like genuine issues or things you're curious or concerned about like, legit you could sit down and have STD talks with this man ("h-hey Ozzie is it normal to have xyz on my you know what" "oh honey yes that's just like a blood blister from friction you're fine" "oh my god ok good because I was worried it was cancer" "HONEY NO 😩") meanwhile fucking Valentino over here would be like "bitch why you got cellulite" and like make backhanded comments like, oh maybe he could reward you with a boob job instead of your next paycheck (as in like, cosmetic surgery 💀 you know I've thought about that? Yan Valentino who's crazy for ya but, not crazy enough to not make certain, tweaks to your actual body. Maybe he dyes your hair or has it styled a specific way and basically refuses to let you do whatever you want with it. Gets your boobs or ass done. Makes you get fillers/botox for any wrinkles/static lines. Controlling your wardrobe is a must. You're like his little.... pursedog)

(That being said though. I'd still let him hit 😩 reader who gets drunk and fucks around and finds out--)

Anyways though, over here in our corner we believe in unapologetic self indulgence and I still believe a Reader who has magical abilities or powers and whatnot and can travel the rings through whatever convoluted means is a fun time. So. We're gonna do that! I mean. Asmodeus honestly seems chill enough that even if you like, somehow crashed into his club, as long as you were polite and respectful, he'd be chill with letting your hang around, maybe even getting a kick out of teasing you (but never pushing anything too far unless you show interest, and if you show any discomfort or trauma he backs off to re-strategize). I imagine his club would actually be pretty fun? Drinks, live music, although, kind of makes me wonder, how openly horny is this place? Probably not like "coochie in your face" like working for Valentino, so, Reader could even be all "honestly this is such a much more safe welcoming environment to engage in like sexuality" and Ozzie hears this and its like, dude. You might as well have just struck him through the heart with cupids own arrow, but, also, he's curious, what other places have you been?

I'm kind of convinced that if a little imp cunt like Crimson thinks he has the balls to stand up against Ozzie, hostage or not, I kinda feel like. Valentino would probably openly treat Asmodeus like shit. He'd probably be a catty fucking bitch to him. He probably looks at Ozzie as like, a diet coke version of himself, a version who has so much power but doesn't go far enough, and probably scoffs at Asmodeus' romantic attachment (even though Val has some weird on-off thing with Vox himself). Valentino doesn't give two fucks about consent and would probably openly mock Ozzie'e values

Or. They could be big business partners because, maybe there's some sort of inter-Ring porn trafficking pipeline or something, smuggling the good shit up from Lust and trading it with stuff from Sinners, who have more visual variety besides other perks etc

But just picture, Asmodeus and Fizz are, minding their own biz, at the club, chilling, listening to music, eating food vaguely shaped like clocks, and Ozzie's cell rings, and they're both like "aw I bet Reader's calling to say they're having fun at that party or whatever" but they answer it and you're like, hiding in the bathroom or a closet or something, crying, whispering under your breath "d-do you still have a place for me to stay like you said before 🥺 Valentino is really, REALLY drunk tonight and he's really scaring me, he grabbed me and--"

They're both at your exact location in like less than 5 minutes and maybe have to play it off, Ozzie distracting Val while Fizz steals you away, or, juicier, like. Imagine Val snatching your phone from your hand, going through your messages, "who the fuck have you been talking to?" And he pulls like the classic abusive boyfriend move and when he sees you're in frequent contact with someone named "Ozzie" he calls him from your phone and as soon as a male voice picks up, they're both going at it "bitch who the fuck are you?" "Bitch who the fuck are YOU?" "Why you got my baby's number?" "Why do YOU have MY baby's PHONE???" "I'm about to HAVE my foot up your ass, you--" like, you know what I mean? Asmodeus is rolling up and these two are all but butting heads with each other as you have to awkwardly explain how you know both of them and of course, suddenly there's a not quite comfortable conversation about which one of them you... "belong to", neither of them wanting to leave you with the other (although I imagine in a physical fight Asmodeus would win but Valentino would have homefield advantage involving his security dudes)

Either way like.... oh my god watching them lounge in that nice big bed together. Fizz being on Ozzie's chest, like. Give me that 😩😩😩 "oh Reader, baby, so glad you took up our offer for a place to crash, but, since it was so short notice it'll have to be with us tonight" type shit and like you're fine with that but then bedtime comes and. There's Literally Only One Bed. And you're like ok you know what I'm not really in a position to be ungrateful, Valentino could have actually fucking hurt me or trafficked me or whatever, but, you're still small enough that Asmodeus could hypotheticallyyyy just, reach an arm over and scoop up you into his chest for a cuddle, or just have you in the crook of his arm like a cat or a teddy bear. Ozzie definitely sees an immediate perk on Fizz not being so much of a troll as to give you the airhorn treatment your first morning there, so, obviously, they have, multiple motivations to, keep urging you to stay 👀 after all, Val is going to be looking for you in the Pride Ring, and you don't have any other friends, so, you're kind of stuck with their whims aren't you? Unless you try to run off on your own, and I mean. Really. They can just hire someone to bring you back lmao. Or get you themselves. Could you imagine feeling way you uncomfortable around them and slipping away and suddenly you find a little white demon dog on wheels happily rolling up to you out of nowhere and it's. Fucking tracking you for Fizzarolli and Asmodeus, like. Damn, can't even trust the dogs in Hell. Demon dogs in Ohio be like

Anyways idk I just like the idea of like. Combining several ideas, you do the whole "accidentally did the whole Death Fall From The Sky and crash into Vals sunroof, he keeps you in servitude because you have to repay him, eventually you Fall into Lust and you start basically doing double jobs at both clubs and prefer Ozzie and he eventually has to rescue you". Also like Valentino "canonically" humiliates his partners on social media so I can imagine he's just publicly belittling and negging you all the time. One second you're happy at Ozzie's listening to music and eating unholy amounts of onion rings with your quirky well intentioned clown friend, the next week Asmodeus sees a Sinstagram post where Valentino is just like "cutie was whining she couldn't get any tips so I helped her out 😜🤭🍈🍈" and its just. A photo of you in your work uniform where he clearly just reached forward and tore open the front of your blouse and he is just. Full on deadass without any hint of irony making you basically work in your bra and he's just without any remorse posting photos of your running mascara and you're clearly crying but what can you do?

Val posting a photo of him literally shoving a tip INTO your bra, his FINGERS in there, and other like little clips and snippets of him demeaning you while you're like actually fucking blubbering "and make sure to get me extra ice!" "*sobbing noises*" "I didn't hear a REPLY! Do I need to take some of those nice tips I'm helping you make?" "N n noOo I'm sorry" "sorry WHAT?" "M sorry mister Valentino, I'm sorry, I'll get your drink right away mister Valentino" and Val is just slapping your ass HARD as you turn to leave like and just laughing like this is the most fun he's ever had

like I feel like Asmodeus realistically would only be able to do so much IN Pride itself (because would You show up in your boss' turf doing your own shit? Big risk) BUT, I mean. You go down to Lust and you're basically fair game. You show up to your next shift after The Boob Incident and Ozzie's like "giiiiiiiirl imma keep it real with you, I know you wanna try and be independent but I got some concerns--" and he's barely even halfway through it before you're just, TEAR EXPLOSION, "i hate working for him, I HATE IT, I wanna work HERE full time, but I don't have a place to staAaaAaay" and just. Some UGLY crying because you're at wits end

Zero hesitation here's Asmodeus "Sweetie what kind of apartment do you want??? You want a penthouse? I can get you a penthouse?? You want some shopping money?? Tell Big O whatever you need." and the next thing you know Valentino is scrolling through Sinastagram and has to do a double take as your account starts posting all kinds of photos of you looking cute and having fun and, poolside in a bathing suit and you're becoming more comfortable with your body and your sexuality and, he's thirsty absolutely, goes to try and tease you or make fun of you and you're just like "you wanna fuck me so bad it makes you look stupid" and just ignore him as Val is forced to watch you pal around with Asmodeus (either as just friends or total fuck buddies like, deadass catch me out here "hey so, there's this position I've always wanted to try--")

#yandere x reader #yandere hazbin hotel #yandere stuff #sinprompts #yandere helluva boss #idk do i even. tag this series. idk.#you can tell this shits been in my drafts

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luvrrgirl444 · 1 year

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chapter 8: bros so obsessed w me

a month & a half later

“yo, wassup guys!” connie shouted at the camera from the passenger seat.

the four of you were in jean’s car, with jean in the driver’s seat, connie in the passenger seat, and you and sasha in the backseat.

“could you be any fucking louder, bro?” jean questioned while rolling his eyes.

“anyways!” you exclaimed from the backseat. “today we’re doing a q&a slash would you rather in the car, because why the fuck not?”

“we also have chipotle!” sasha said, putting her burrito into the camera.

“i swear if i see one grain of rice in my goddamn car, you guys will never set foot in here again.”

you three giggled at jean’s words, even though you knew he was dead serious.

“so,” sasha started. “we asked you guys on instagram to send us some questions.”

connie then opened instagram on his phone and entered the group account.

“yo, over 10,000 replies is crazy.” he said, scrolling through the replies.

question 1: when did u guys first start making youtube videos?

“we started making videos as a group back in middle school.” connie answered before taking a sip of his root beer.

you and sasha groaned. “those videos are mad embarrassing” sasha said.

you all nodded. “i looked fucking terrifying with braces.” you said.

“bro looked like missy from big mouth.” connie said before him, jean and sasha bursted into laughter.

a picture of younger you appeared onto the screen, with a picture of missy beside it. the words ‘spot the difference (HARD)’ were also on the screen.

“connie, you laughing a bit too much for a bitch who looked like eleven for most of their life.” you replied while rolling your eyes.

jean choked on his soda and sasha continued laughing.

“no,” laugh “fucking,” laugh “way,”

a picture of younger connie appeared onto the screen with a picture of eleven beside it. ‘twins’ was put onto the screen.

“the fuck are you two laughing at?”

“yeah, sasha. you literally looked like that funny bitch from the loud house,”

“and jean looked like sherman from mr peabody and sherman. with those round ass glasses.”

they both went silent and you and connie laughed. they then joined in and continued laughing.

🫧

jean was answering the twelfth question when you got a notification on your phone.

it was a text from eren.

hot british guy: hey are you busy?

it had been a month and a half since you gave him your number, and you guys had been texting everyday. you had found out a lot more about him, like the fact that he lived with his adoptive sister and their childhood best friend.

you opened the text message and replied while your friends were arguing about which gatorade flavor is the best.

with a smile on your face, you turned your phone off and rejoined the gatorade debate.

“bro fruit punch is literally the best flavor.” connie said.

“nah. we all know its lemon lime,” you replied, and sasha nodded her head.

“i agree. cool blue is definitely in second place.”

connie turned and looked at sasha with a hurt expression on his face.

“sasha, what the fuck? i thought you were my twin?”

“don’t ever do that expression again,” sasha told him before busting into laughter.

“okay!” jean said to the camera. “i say we wrap this shit up, before connie has a fucking meltdown,”

“fuck you!”

“hope you guys enjoyed the video, bye!” you and sasha said in sync.

🫧

- the video concept is based the sturniolo triplets

- i haven’t updated in SO LONG IM SORRY

taglist !! : @greeniegreengreen @hahaimnotdeadyet @bakuhoes-bxtch @itzgabz22 @princess-jaeger @marsandsaturn @violenthots @urlovemaze @conniesbbymama @llovergirlll @iheartamajiki @444yeager @liliorsstuff-blog

#aot fanfiction #aot smau #aot x black reader #attack on titan #connie springer #eren x black reader #eren jaeger #fake tweets #shingeki no kyojin #x black reader #youtube #modern au #sasha blouse #jean kirstein

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loopscereal · 5 months

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You said to send you screenshots to redraw, so... Maybe one of these two? Personally my favorite of your redesigns have been for Owynn's gang and the twins (and Deuz but I didn't like any particular screenshot for him).

It's also okay if you don't want to, no pressure fjrvdjdvdjevakavqj

a month + 1 day late but HAHAHAH REDRAWWW

okiii sorry this took a goddamn month and sorry for no shading but i AM doing this for funa nd for free but i never forgot , i never forgot multi i promise, i even let my brogram record a timelapse thingy if you want it. 1) yes u redesigned town from the last time i drews him what about it??? (i also redesigned eak but i never did a digital drawing of his previous default ass ) anyways i was itching to make them both more. more ours i guess? Towns black now cause i want to and also lions are african animals and thats enough to convince me lmao. idk its fun, sue me. we dont uhhhh we dont suuuuper tie where the animal is from tot heir race, but sometimes we do and it works out nicely uhhh

2) multi, or anyone seeing this ig, if ya want zoom'in just tell me and ill reblog this with zoom ins n shit. yeah. 3) I REALIZED I FORGOT TOWNS FUCKING FRECKLES. iiii im iffy on adding freckles to him, they did look cute but im worried itll make his face too busy. eaks face is so busy and i do not need another. also busy-ness is why i didnt doshadeing. i tried, i really did try to ger some quick flat shading in, but it looked too busy and just a mess i couldnt do it kjerhblol lmao. 4)uhhhh feel free to ask questions ig. IF ANYONE ELSE ANTS TO REQUEST REDRAW REQUESTS FEEL SO FREE I LOVE DOING REDRAWS. also im totally gonna do the pup and chica one too dont you even worry about it

anyways tysm for the ask and request :) have a good dayyyy love ya fnafhsblr lmao

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whumpster-fire · 5 months

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25 Exciting Phrases to Spice Up Your Next Business e-Mail

1: "Dear Motherfucker,"

2: "To whom it may concern, as well as the entire company directory who I am cc'ing because none of you care about my time so I don't care about yours,"

3: If you'd like to know why I am sending this e-mail, please consider reading it for fucking once."

4: "If I do not see conclusive evidence of your head being out of your ass in the next 3-5 business days, I will remove it from your shoulders."

5: "Please attach a current headshot and resume: the latter so I can laugh at your alleged qualifications, the former so I can print it out and put it on a dartboard as advised by HR's Anger Management Seminar"

6: "Due to the considerable destructive forces at my command,"

7: "Cc'ing The Pope on this one to keep him in the loop since the magnitude of this clusterfuck is nothing short of Biblical,"

8: "This is the fourth e-mail I have sent asking you to do your goddamn job. The fifth will be attached to a brick hurled through your office window. You do not want to know what the sixth will be, so get your shit together ASAP please."

9: "Please keep in mind that refraining from inappropriate use of the Reply All button is the only thing separating us from descending into complete Lord Of the Flies anarchy."

10: "All, please review the selection of Dilbert cartoons attached below and reflect on how they might be relevant to the current situation and your role in it."

11: "The Carpool Committee has unanimously voted to play exclusively Alvin And the Chipmunks songs in any vehicle you are a passenger in for a month the next time you schedule a mandatory meeting before 8 AM."

12: "The potted Ficus tree by the 4th Floor break room will be taking the lead on this project from this point on since it is more qualified than any of you."

13: "I didn't think I needed to inform everyone that 'accidentally' stapling your balls to get out of Company Spirit Meetings early is against company policy. However,"

14: "Due to recent events, any personal office supplies brought from home, e.g. paperweights, must now be checked with a Geiger counter."

15: "Please be advised that if you reply with a question that indicates you have not read and understood the list of action items below in its entirety, I will kick you in the teeth so hard you will chew with your appendix in the future."

16: "We regret to announce that Sean is now an outlaw and no longer protected by our Workplace Violence Policy. This decision was not made lightly, but the current situation re: the break room microwaves has forced our hand. Cc'ing Sean to keep him in the loop."

17: "Please keep in mind that you are neither the most profitable nor the most important of our clients, and your disproportionate share of billable hours is due primarily to your whininess, entitled attitude, and inability to give a straight answer."

18: "If you feel the need to contact me outside my scheduled hours, please write your issue on a piece of letter sized paper, then roll it up, seal it inside a glass bottle, and cast it into the ocean. This will get a faster response than emailing, calling, or texting me at 1 in the fucking morning."

19: "Team, As a result of employees being bombarded with hundreds of e-mails after inadvertently hitting reply all, we are now instituting the following change to our e-mail communication policy: to help prevent duplicate corrections, when admonishing a coworker who you feel has used Reply All inappropriately, please make sure to use Reply All as well so the other recipients can see that the responsible party has already been notified of their mistake."

20: "Cc'ing you on every e-mail about this issue due to your record of not giving a shit about a problem unless your time is being wasted."

21: "Please do not disturb the protective circle of salt around the 2nd fridge from the left in the break room, and do not under any circumstances open it without appropriate PPE and an escort from an old priest and a young priest."

22: "After consulting with Legal and HR, we have determined that the ficus tree by the 4th floor break room dispersing pollen into the office environment does not constitute a violation of our sexual harassment policy. Also, please be advised that the ficus tree is female and is not the source of your pollen allergies. No disciplinary action will be taken against it. However, your repeated complaints targeted at the ficus tree based on its status as a plant may constitute a hostile work environment. Please meet with HR ASAP to discuss this further."

23: "Team, Placing an 'Elf On the Shelf' in any location on company premises or within your home office where it may be able to see, overhear, or access proprietary information will result in disciplinary action up to and including termination of employment. Company proprietary data may not be divulged to any unauthorized third parties, and that includes Santa Claus."

24: "Cc'ing Santa Claus to keep him in the loop on this one."

25: "Sincerely, The Only Guy Who Does His Goddamn Job Around Here."

#shitpost #workposting #emails #another day at the office #business e-mail etiquette #comical threats of violence #pettiness #surreal humor

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bulletsgirl · 7 months

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Damien is out of his goddamn mind. This isn’t a recent development, but it’s an important aspect of his work that often goes ignored. In place of this key element is the idea that his music is a sober and in-depth excavation of the American landscape and rural psyche. Well, folks, I’m sorry, but it’s not. Damien Jurado is every character in every Damien Jurado song. He is the gun, the purple anteater, the paper wings, the avalanche, the air show disaster, Ohio, the ghost of his best friend’s wife. It is a universe unto its own, with it’s own symbolism, creation myth, and liturgy. You might go as far as to call it a religion, and your religion is a character in his religion. Level with me. You're reading this because of Damien Jurado’s new album, 'Brothers and Sisters of the Eternal Son' (produced by Richard Swift). You are a progressive minded, left-leaning person who in parlor-style conversation regarding the globo-political ramifications of Sky Person relationships laughs knowingly so as not to be judgmental and very reasonably concedes “Well, I don’t believe He’s some old man with a beard sitting up in the clouds” at which point everyone agrees on [insert benign middle-ground] and moves on. Consider this: What if the only way to understand a religion is to create your own? Who is this Silver community? Where the hell are they in the Bible? Is this heresy? Agnostic reference? Isn’t this sun business a little, I don’t know, animistic? Pagan? Go ahead and answer that question for yourself. I’ll give you a second. Do you understand the music any better? You know that adage we all use so we have something to say while we shrug our shoulders? “People change”? That one. Is that applicable to Jesus Christ? Maybe he’s been on a personal journey of discovery since he ascended. He went through the 60’s, 70’s, he turned on, tuned out, got disillusioned. Why can’t we talk about that Jesus? Does it have to be the old-timey one all the time? American folk Jesus, ugh. The one who’s always winning Best Soundtrack Oscars for people. Rarely do stories of faith make us identify with Jesus. It’s Abraham, Satan, Silver Timothy, Salome, Dr. J, Saul of Tarsus; divinely imperfect brothers and sisters who give Gawd something to do. Damien Jurado made up his own Jesus because a Damien Jurado album needs a beautiful Jesus. Some freaky space Jesus that I don’t recognize. The name is the same, a lot of the imagery is the same, but he’s reborn. Born again, I mean. Yeah, as if Jesus got born again. That’s what this album sounds like. Jesus is out of his goddamn mind and I want to live in Damien’s America. Sign me up.

— Father John Misty; 09-20-2013

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angelasscribbles · 11 months

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Victim of Love Chapter 11: In This Moment

Series: Victim of Love

Fandom: The Royal Romance

Pairings: Drake x Riley, Liam x Riley, Liam x Hana, Riley x Hana (past)

Word Count: 1,421

Rating: MA

Warnings for this chapter: None really, just sadness lol

Song Inspiration for series: Victim of Love by The Eagles

And tell all your girlfriends

You been around the world friends That talk is for losers and fools

A/N: Posting this today because I told @kingliam2019 I would! 🤣Also, special shout out to the meme queen @karahalloway, you'll get it when you see it.

My other stuff: Master List.

“Sorry, but the top floor is reserved for the royal family. No one else is allowed up there.”

Drake didn’t even blink as his eyes scanned the rest of the guards stationed up and down the hallway. His face lit up as he waved and called out, “Bastien!”

“Drake!” The middle-aged man with greying hair and the physique of someone who still works out daily strode toward them with a wide smile. Pulling Drake into a hug, he asked, “Why haven’t you been to see me yet, son?”

“Sorry ‘bout that,” he responded as he clapped the older man on the back with a sidelong glance at Riley, “Been…busy.”

Bastien looked over Drake’s shoulder as the embrace ended. He extended his hand, “And Lady Riley, how nice to see you again.”

“Bastien.” She returned the handshake.

“I suppose you’re here to support Liam. Well, come on,” he ushered them down the hallway and no one stopped him.

Bastien escorted them to a waiting area and then disappeared to let the king know they were there. Liam appeared a few minutes later, his eyes zeroing in on the woman in the room as if Drake wasn’t even there, “Riley!”

Liam moved quickly across the waiting room floor and into her arms. She returned the embrace, holding him tightly while he sobbed against her shoulder.

“It’s okay, it’s okay, it’s going to be okay, I’m here,” she crooned as she patted his back, “How is she? How’s the baby?”

“They’re fine, for now,” he pulled back, wiping his eyes as he did so, “She had some bleeding, so her guards rushed her here.”

“Bleeding?” Riley’s voice rose in concern, “Why? From what?”

“The doctors said it’s something called placental previa, the placenta is basically too low.”

“Can they fix that?”

“No, but it often resolves on its own as the pregnancy progresses.”

“So we just have to what…wait?”

“Bed rest, no heavy lifting, no stress, things like that, and yes, wait.”

Riley jerked like she’d been hit. “No stress….” She spun away from him and stalked across the room to the row of windows overlooking the parking lot as guilt punched her in the gut.

She was stressful for Hana. Her mere presence, her relationship with Liam, their estranged friendship, all of it.

Liam started to go after her but was stopped midstride as Drake clapped him on the shoulder, “Hey, I’m sorry this is happening, but you’re going to do everything in your power to make sure she has a good outcome. You have all the resources in the world.”

Liam gave him a sad smile, “You’re right. She’ll have a full-time medical staff as well as a full-time wait staff, so she doesn’t have to lift a finger, she’ll be monitored constantly. I just…I feel so goddamned guilty!”

“You didn’t cause this.”

“No, but I haven’t helped the situation, have I?”

From across the room Riley listened as Drake comforted Liam. She knew Drake was right about everything, but she agreed with Liam. The situation between them had become untenable. She headed for the door, “Which room is she in?”

Liam looked startled, “Riley, I don’t think-“

“I promise I’m not going to stress her out, Liam. The opposite in fact. I have some things I need to say to her to repair a little of the damage we’ve done.”

“I don’t know…”

“Liam, please! She’s my best friend! If she gets upset in any way, I’ll leave immediately!”

Liam hesitated a moment then nodded. He opened the door to the hallway and gave instructions to a guard to escort Riley to the queen’s room.

The guard showed her to the room. She opened the door quietly and stepped inside.

Hana’s eyes widened, “What are you doing here?”

“I’m sorry, I just wanted to make sure you were okay, I can leave-“ Riley pointed back toward the door.

“No, wait! Don’t leave!”

She turned back to face her former best friend, “Yes?”

“You were worried about me?”

“Of course I was!” Riley walked across the room and dropped into the chair closest to the bed, “I know things have been….bad between us since you…since I….since everything with Liam, but deep down I still love you and I couldn’t bear the thought of anything happening to you or your baby!”

The baby whose existence had tormented her. Now she felt like the biggest asshole on the planet for her raging jealousy. It wasn’t the baby’s fault, and no one deserved to lose a child.

“I didn’t know you still cared,” Hana said so quietly Riley almost didn’t hear it.

“I told you I loved you, Hana, and I meant it. I just didn’t love you the way you needed me to, and I’m sorry for that. And I’m sorry for continuing a relationship with him after he chose you.”

“I knew he was in love with you when I married him. I’m sorry I’ve been such a bitch about it.”

“You haven’t!”

Hana raised an eyebrow at her.

Riley laughed, “Okay, you have, but it’s been justified!”

“I should have told him no.”

“And done what? Gone back to Shanghai?”

“No,” she scoffed, “But maybe if he’d married Madeleine, you and I could have mended things with each other.”

“That’s a lovely thought. But he probably would have convinced me to stay no matter whom he had married.”

“Right. Because you love him.”

Riley shook her head, “I’m sorry, Hana. But I know what I have to do now. I promise I’m not going to be a problem for you anymore.”

“What do you mean? What do you have to do?”

“I have to leave…”

Hana lunged forward, “Riley, no…”

“Not forever, but long enough for you to recover. You need to be stress-free for the duration of this pregnancy. I’m sorry, Hana, for everything! I never should have stayed here in the first place, then maybe you and Liam could have had a real chance.”

“No, Riley, you were right, I married him to hurt you-“

“I hurt you first!”

“All you did was fall in love with someone else. You can’t control whom you love, Riley. I get that, especially now. If I could have controlled it, I would have just stopped loving you.”

“So, it’s true, you just said yes to me to hurt her.” a quiet voice said from the doorway.

“Liam!” Riley jumped, “I didn’t hear you come in.”

“I’m sorry,” Hana dropped her eyes ashamedly to her lap, “it’s true.”

“It’s okay, darling,” Liam took the chair on the other side of the hospital bed and pulled her hand to his mouth to kiss it, “I wasn’t in love with you either. And I’m sorry I wasn’t more up-front about my feelings and clearer about my intentions with both of you. I…I regret ruining your friendship. But I do love you now, Hana, you and our child! I will do whatever is necessary to ensure your health and safety! Both of you!”

Riley felt like a knife had just been plunged into her heart. Of course Liam had come to love Hana over time. Hana was extremely lovable. She was sweet, kind, caring, loving, and passionate, as well as intelligent and funny. All the qualities one could want in a partner really.

She fought back her tears and when she was able to speak without crying, she reiterated, “I’m going to remove myself from the equation so you can both focus on getting this baby here safely and on supporting each other.”

“What?” Liam’s head jerked up and he stared at her in horror.

Riley bit back her tears as she told him, “You know it’s for the best. Your focus should be here right now.”

“I…” his eyes dipped back to his wife before lifting back to Riley with resignation, “You’re right.”

“I know I am. I’m sorry again, Hana. For all of it.” She stood to leave.

“I’m sorry too, Riley. I’m sorry I let my hurt feelings go too far. I miss our friendship.”

Riley leaned over to hug her. “Maybe after this baby is born, we can work on repairing it?”

“I’d like that.”

They held each other for a long while, both women shaking with silent tears.

Riley pulled away and walked to the door. She stepped into the hallway and looked back. Just before the door closed, she caught Liam’s eye and mouthed, “I love you.” Then she turned and ran back to the waiting room, crashing into Drake’s arms.

#victim of love #angelasscribbles #trr au #drake walker #drake x mc #drake x riley #the royal romance #trr #the royal romance fanfic #choices fic writers creations #cfwc fics of the week #choices #liam rys

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incarnateirony · 2 years

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I genuinely don't understand how or why Jensen supposedly involved Misha in The Winchesters from the start but didn't even tell Jared that something was happening. And I can only imagine how pissed Jared would be at Misha too for not only being involved but not saying anything either. Why would Jensen do that with Misha and not Jared. It makes no sense.

Because it was none of Jared's fucking business. Jared just production burned himself to half the media world with that pissant stunt whether fans realize it or not. It's how to get soft blacklisted.

TV doesn't work on The Power Of Friendship. The story isn't about Jared. And while fans are going WELL ITS NOT ABOUT CAS EITHER lmfao yes it is just fuckin wait. In a different way, from a different focus, but it absolutely fucking is about Cas too, finalizing Cas' story, tying off the bits that got dropped, and most of all highlighting Dean's new profound realization of what Cas is to him (hence chuckling about the Who We Are release. There's a reason the i hate and love you popped up, the underscoring of The Truth, all of it. Like just skim that script and watch your brain explode to get how deep Berens' work is stamped into The Winchesters, regardless of what any credits show.)

That said. Jared just. Didn't have to know any more than Ruthie had to know or any other person that would have some meaningful future cameo or two would know. The critical people involved in it matter.

You want to know fuckin WHY Misha knew first? Because it's a goddamn gift to him, as much as a fix for jensen and dean, and as much as it is for the fans. Misha was in a terrible fucking place in life. He recently opened up that he went suicidal during that period. He was ending a like 20 year marriage, selling his house because of Washington state rules, worrying about his kids, then got cut out of the show and basically erased in an act of malice.

Regardless of what antis say, they're good friends. Even though Jensen didn't have the shape of his product in December, he had already been talking to Misha like, bro. We'll fix it. Okay? You matter man. You matter to me and you matter to Dean and you matter to this whole world of fans. I don't know how, but we're gonna fix it. And then he locked in his first wave of motions and deals, texted Misha, and Misha I mean... Misha got hope back.

That's. Fucking. Why. It's none of Jared's business and was literally built partially for Misha. Jensen already wanted a Dean fix, but he knew that involved Misha. Hell, ever since Dean curled on the floor and sobbed and Jensen had his "new take on it in the next shot", Jensen knew there was no dividing Cas from Dean to fix their resolutions, even beyond how deeply it impacted a dear friend in a troubled chapter of his life.

That's fuckin why.

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deadly-fabrication · 7 months

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𝐚𝐫𝐜𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐞

bingiplier drabble

︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭

Arcades were becoming less and less frequent. Hearing such businesses shut down had become commonplace, almost like a repeat of the videostore extinction. Still, one place in town kept itself busy, doubling itself on minigolf and a bowling alley. That wasn't the reason why people went. This particular entertainment centre advertised androids as their greeters and guides. Each android had their own story, often shared amongst the human employees rather than the customers.

You could be one of the lucky few.

A Bing unit offered to be your guide throughout the activities. As stated on the website, Microsoft gifted a good handful of its creations to this establishment - must have something to do with their latest VR experience, which was also installed and advertised. That was it for surface knowledge, not that you initially planned on diving deeper.

The slightest hint of a snicker tainted the air as you missed yet another swing. Snapping your head at your artificial guide, you couldn't help but notice the silliest, goddamn goofiest grin wiped across his face. At least someone was having fun. Bing leaned on his club, careful not to break it under his own weight. “Between you and me, I ain't good at this either.” Unaware of any sort of rules, without swapping your ball out for his, he decided to take a swing. The ball never left the tee. But, oh something did fly.

“Whoops.” Did Bing throw his club on purpose? It completely slipped his grip, and there it was, lying on the astroturf. For an attempt to cheer you up, it was a little patronising. Still, he tried. You were smiling, weren't you? There wasn't a clear winner by the end, not that the competition mattered.

Bing continued guiding you through activities, cheering you on. Though, after a genuinely disheartening loss, he removed his shades and placed them on you instead. “Keep em! I have more.” Such an uplifting attitude, from someone who arguably wasn't real by human standards. Seeing the black sclera and orange irises in his mechanical eyes, it further pushed his nonhuman existence. Despite that, his grins were contagious, as was his laughter.

The two of you sat down, eventually. It was the perfect moment to ask questions. “Were you programmed this way?”

“What way?” He threw the question back at you.

“You know, all human-like! You're so... expressive?”

The Bing unit could only laugh, as he has been all day. “We call it "breaking the stereotype." But, yeah kinda. It's more like I was programmed to adapt socially.”

Moments passed, an employee walking over with the food you ordered, and a little bit extra. A hotdog? You never asked for that. Before you could open your mouth to question them, the android at your side eagerly snatched at the food. Right after a quick, "Thanks!" you watched as he began chowing down.

“You eat?!”

“Yeah, don't you?”

That was... a valid respond. The two of you shared lunch together, then your goodbyes. Well, you surely learnt more about him, nothing truly groundbreaking, but it was a start. You got some free shades out of it too.

#bingiplier #bing irl #mark egos #iplier egos #fic #possum's drabbles

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sketchfanda · 5 months

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A Little Moxxie Love:Now THAT’S Comedy!!

Somedays was just another day in hell, especially in Imp City. Violence on the streets, the odd riot here or there as its denizens of imps, hellhounds, sinners and all the manner of hellborn walked to and fro going about their business. For Moxxie, his business would've been enjoying a rare bit of peace and quiet at the I.M.P office, basking in the downtime before and inbetween jobs or gigs.

But noooo, could't have that now could? Maybe even just some quality time with his lovely wife, Christ on a stick, he'd take some personal time with Loona or one of his, what was the word he was looking for? Oh right, Booty Calls. But insead of any of that, here he was in the living world, sneaking his way around a local park somewhere in Burbank, California looking for a tree house.

No not like some little cabin club house for some neighbourhood tykes, as like an actual, literal treehouse!! A very infamous one at that for you see this treehouse belonged to quite the celebrity. One our favourite little Imp Hitman had the distinct pleasure of being designated to deliver the client's revenge by proxy. As the sharply dressed, put own upon killer for hire mumbled to himself like a certain dastardly mutt, hauling a package securely in his arms, he couldn't help but reflect on how he wound up here. Thinking back to how it all started with that goddamn wolf....

~Imp City, The Pride Ring in Hell as overseen by King Lucifer Morningstar. To be precise, The Office of I.M.P (Immediate Murder Professionals, duh!!),a few moments ago~

??:"And that's why I want that damn-blasted squirrel dead!! DEAD!! YA' HEAR ME!! D,E,A,D DEAD as a doornail!! As dead as she made me!!"* Moxxie along with his ever lovely wife Millie and Blitzo's surly teen hellhound secretary and dispatcher Loona simply sat at their usual meeting room table, varying degrees of deadpan expressions on their faces as their latest potential client seemed to finally finishing his rambling tangent of ranting and raving, nonplussed as he seemed be coughing up a storm. The sinner before them was particular as he looked similar to but sure as fuck wasn't a hellhound like Loona. No this wolf was a sinner of the recently deceased variety and depending how well you knew your toon celebrities, he was a famous one.*

Loona:*shares a glance to her imp co-workers,slash friends with benefits (Don't tell Blitzo,none of his business what a grown hellhound does with her sex and love life.) before she rolls her eyes as she types at her phone.)"Right so yeah no shit Sherlock,we get that. You want this lady offed, kind of what we do here Pops..."

??:”That’s Walter Wolf to you, you punk ass whatever! Kids these days not even a mister, no it’s just pops, you’re about as worse than that squirrel!!”*The hellhound effortlessly ducked the old sinner’s cane as he once again went on another rambling tangent. Loona and the imp couple rolling their eyes as they waited for Yiddish accented codger to refocus. Yes sir, the one and only Walter Wolf, archenemy regular punch bag of Slappy Squirrel. Still holding a grudge and no doubt having wound up here because he finally bit the big one and it really came to bite him in his senile furry behind.*

Moxxie:*deciding it was time at least to try and get this conversation back on track. Particularly before the old lupine sinner caused himself to die...again. Was it possible to die twice in Hell for a sinner?* "Sir yes we get it. As Loona told you, we make it our business to go to the living world and get the likes of you their payback. So details would be nice, especially if there's any specific way you want her to die?"

Walter:*paused mid rant as he adjusted his glasses, squinting at Moxxie.* "Alright you little red skinned horned opossum, that's how you want it, you got it. I want you to take this little bundle right here and plant it somewhere in that uppity Slappy's tree in Burbank. Put it somewhere she's never gonna find it and KABOOM!! Ol' Walter Wolf finally wins one!! In your face ya uppity squirrel bitch!!"

Millie and Loona could only narrow their eyes with deadpan intent at the coughing, wheezing old wolf sinner, given the state of him implied exactly how he'd died in the first place. But hey leave it to old Walter Wolf to never learn a lesson, right? As Moxxie nervously eyed the package he now held in his hand, hearing the ticking of a clock as beneath its simple light brown wrapping paper was a bomb. Realising with little to no doubt he was going to have to go to the living world and actually try to kill Slappy Squirrel of all people!!

Moxxie:"....Oh crumbs...."*Now really given the circumstances and the magnitude of the situation he was about to find himself in? Who could blame him for being only able to respond like that? if Blitzo were here, there was no doubt he'd tell moxxie man up, stop being a little bitch and go kill the old squirrel!! It was their job!!*

~And now back to our regular feature present~

That moment of reflection made Moxxie grit his teeth and spit, if not outright hiss as he reminded himself if and when he saw that old wolf again? He'd slap the absolute shit out of him, like it wasn't bad enough he was going to try kill Slappy Squirrel? One of the few fondest moments in his otherwise abysmal childhood had been watching old Slappy cartoons from the living world with his gone far too soon saint of a mom. But of course sweet precious Millie took a moment to convince him to take up this job alone as 1. Blitzo was too busy with his usual shenanigans and 2. She felt going solo would do his confidence a world of good.

So of course he continued on, mustering up the fortitude to carry out his mission. Besides which he knew he had to make it fast enough since that stupid fucking wolf didn't tell him how long he had exactly left on the timer for this bomb!! Any further hesitation or delays and KABOOM!! but finally the sweet relief as he found himself at what had to be the tree that the squirrel called home.

It was fortunate especially for our fave little imp boi that it was dark out, made for a little stealth. Millie was onto something, doing this solo was doing wonders for his self esteem especially when he didn't have to be overly elaborate like at that summer camp trying to be in charge. Unlike that mission this would be direct and to the point, get in and plant the bomb then hightail out of there like bat out well, hell. Determined more than ever, the imp managed to pry open a window soon as he got close to the house, entering the living room so far so good, still unseen and unheard.

Now all he needed was a good place to plant the explosive package and he could haul his crimson behind out of here. But he had to be still smart enough about this, Slappy was a crafty one in her cartoons and there was no doubt age only increased that. Spying around the room as he stopped his sights upon a large pile in the corner. Bags and mountains of fan-mail and packages, no doubt too much for the squirrel to bother reading and sorting thorugh, it was perfect!!

Pleased with himself as he hummed a merry tune quietly, the red possum got to work as he dove his hands into the pile, burying the packaged TNT deep within fan-mail pile. A silent sigh of relief at a job about to be very well done, that ought to get Walter to shut up. Before he could start on making his exit, he felt his phone buzz in his pocket, fishing it out to see a text notification from Loona. It had to be legitimately serious for her to message him during a job, she'd been getting somewhat better with the dispatch details and she sure as hell wasn't sending him a sexy pic now of all times as he opened and read it.

Loona:"The stupid old fart just mentioned he set the bomb for 3 hours when he handed it to ya. If you're good to go then haul ass!!"

Moxxie checked his watch and saw the time, doing the mental math between when Walter handed him the package and the time he left for the living world and tried to find Slappy's house. He had about 2 hours, just enough time to make his escape and hopefully plenty of time before Slappy woke up or got home, assuming she was out late. Just as he was about to put his phone away, he froze like a deer in the headlights as he heard the flip and click of a switch, the living room lights snapped on. Turning to the source of the sound and knew all too well at once, he was screwed as he turned and saw Slappy Squirrel herself standing over him......in nothing but a towel as she grabbed him by the shoulders and pinned him against the wall, damn she was a strong old broad.

Moxxie:"Ooh crumbs...."*Now of course Moxxie wasn't just saying that due to being caught in the act but also well, just look at her!! Slappy had more than aged well, hell she was a figurative silver fox!! She had more curves than a freeway and a set of tits and ass that would make Minerva Mink green with envy. Her deadpan blue eyes twinkling no doubt with twinkling with thoughts of how much she was going to make him suffer.*

Slappy:*eyeing the imp as she began to speak up in that grizzled ol' new yorker like accent of hers.* "Ya know, I'll give ya points on the breaking and entering there slick, ain't often I had stalkers sneak into my place and almost not get caught. Would've maybe gotten away with it if I hadn't seen you outside my bedroom window right when I was I was finished hitting the showers. Real ballsy I'll give ya that...."*Moxxie gulped nervously as he awaited whatever toon type mayhem was about to befall him. Slappy was a mistress in the art of comedy-fu after all. It didn't help he was feeling rather turned on seeing her up close like this.*

Moxxie:"Now Ms.Squirrel, or uhm..sorry you've never married, have you? Not to be rude but I explain..."*The Imp paused as he noticed Slappy's eyes narrowed into a seductive gaze. A grin to match forming that sexy furry face of hers, causing him to see she was looking down at his crotch. Oh just terrific, Slappy Squirrel now no doubt thought he was some creepy looney pervert stalker. There was no doubt going to be a mallet in his future for sure when she suddenly spoke up, getting his attention.*

Slappy:"Well now far as sneaky fans go, you're definitely a looker...and really packing it. So I'll give you a pass, hot stuff if you do Lil' Ol' me a favour. It's been way too damn long since I got any and looks to me like you know how to help a lady scratch her itch."*Moxxie had a feeling he knew exactly what Slappy was going on about but there was no way this was happening, right?" Blinking as Slappy unpinned him and let him down, cluthching her towel as she walked with the sort of sway to her backside. Her hips giving off a hypnotic vibe that practically yelled for his attention before the silver fox or rather squirrel turned around. Looing at him with sensual mischief as she made a little come over gesture, finger wagging as she made it clear she wanted him to follow. The imp naturally obliging her of course as they made their way upstairs.*

Moxxie of course was interally freaking out and who could blame him? Okay on the one hand Slappy Squirrel wanted to get laid with him BUT on the other hand he had less than 2 hours and counting before the bomb went off!! If he wanted to get out still alive and breathing then this would take all his prowess and experience he could muster. Bring the A game as they would say because someone of Slappy's age and all clearly got around and anything less would not bode well for our Imp boi.

So there Moxxie now sat on the mattress of Slappy's bed, shirtless and his pants remaining on for now as the fine wine aged squirrel stood before him. That mischievous erotic minx grin on her face as she proceeded to flash him, dropping her towel as she stood before him in all her naked glory. Oh yeah this silver fox of a squirrel hadn't merely aged gracefully, if anything she'd gotten better with age. As she walked up to him, leaning in a way that made those luscious furry boobs of hers jiggle as she took his hands and made him touch them.

Moxxie:"Ooh crumbs..."*Now really could you blame the little guy? Less than 2 hours passing by every second yet here he was with a naked Slappy Squirrel. Her body language just screaming she was down to fuck, her odor a scent of acorns and the indication of her recent aforementioned shower. There was no doubt this toon hit her peak at puberty and never left since and only gotten truly better with age. Unable to look away as she struck a few seductive pin-up poses, showing off and displaying her stunning assets.*

Slappy:"What do you think Little Man? All natural unlike some bimbos I can think to name? No need for all that gentle love making crud, go on ad give them a nice squeeze."*The sensual cougar of a squirrel playfully goaded, shuddering as she sensually bit her lip in response to Moxxie obliging her.* "Mmm damn good hands there...guessing I ain't the first set of tits you played with...then again, what gal wouldn't want that, right?"*She teased coyly as she reached down to caress his crotch, the material of his pants stiff and swollen with his length and girth. Licking her lips as she decided to get a more direct look at the goods she was going to be playing with. Unzipping his fly and pulling down the waistband, boxers and all when her prize sprung out like a jack in the box.*"........Jesus, Mary and goddamn Joseph, where you been all my life, Little Man?"

Moxxie:*blushed as he smiled cutely and modestly, unable to help himself from massaging and playing with Slappy's furry boobs.* "Uhm something like the south...the very deep south."*It wasn't quite a lie, after all Hell was a deep south as you could get. Before he shuddered as Slappy grasped and began to stroke his cock, firmly and steady as she pressed her lips to his. Feeling her tongue shove its way with a thirst on par with honeymoon night with Millie.*

Slappy:*broke the sloppy kiss for air, stray strands of saliva connecting as she panted with desire, hugging Moxxie's face as she pressed it deep against the valley of her grey furred titties. Still beating his meat as she felt Moxxie purr against how warm she felt, her blue eyes gazing at him with a skyrocketing lust.*"Well Little Man from deep down south, I want you to take this damn cock and fuck me into a sexual coma. Fuck me 'til it feels like your dick falls off or I literally die of orgasm. Can you do that for me, Little Man? You want to fuck me so bad I might look like I'd be carrying your kids?"* The sly erotic squirrel grinned with delight as Moxxie gave her his answer in the best possible way. Squeezing and suckling on her boobs, showing he wasn't just experienced with women but not stranger to handling a furry woman either.*

Naturally Slappy was only more than fine to let out deepthroated gasps and moans as she began making out with the imp with a thirst and passion that put horny, hormone addled teenagers to shame. Their lips and tongues dancing together with sloppy desire as they fell on the bed together rolling a tangle of limbs. Silvery grey fur pressed and rubbing against crimson red skin before Slappy found found herself laying atop the imp in a 69 position. Planting her furred booty his face as her bushy tail wagged sensually in satisfaction as grasped and stroked his cock once more.

The silver fox of a squirrel breathed in deep the raw masculine scent radiating off of that dick as she began to plant kisses and licks upon it, spine tingling from the tip of her tail right along her nerves to her brain. Her arousal skyrocketing as she felt Moxxie’s hands grabbing her ass with firm squeezes as she found him eating her out, a very skilled and long tongue probing aw at her slit. This served to further fuel Slappy’s desire as she proceeded to return the favour, taking the length and girth of the imp’s dick and displayed her wealth of sexual experience with stunning fellatio. Deepthroating him in ways that would put even the most skilled porn star to shame before she levelled up the pleasure by sandwiching his shaft between her tits.

Slappy:*grinning sensually as she shot a look over her shoulder at the imp, as she rode on his face. Squeezing his head between her thighs as she stroked and jerked him off with a furry titfuck on his drool soaked dick.* “Mmhm, you’re not making too bad a first impression little man, I’ve made horses and bulls blow their load just from a handjob. Now I’m really looking forward to the min event. Remember, don’t do gentle, I want to fucking rut…” *She further emphasised her point as she locked her mouth back onto that dick. Licking and sucking what wasn’t covered by her big furry melons.*

Moxxie was well aware how intense and rough Slappy wanted it, unknown to most but a few select fans was that Slappy had a very active sex life. Some rumours went about that she’d done some porn here and there, even still today she held a high rank as the most searched GMILF/GILF around. Plus the fact he still had a bomb to worry about only reminded him this wasn’t just sex for surviving the wrath of Slappy, it was to fuck for his life!! As he smacked Slappy’s ass like a bingo drum, making the cougar of a squirrel moan as he continued to display his own oral skills, getting her nice and wet.

As soon as the moment to proceed past foreplay presented itself of course, our fave possum wasted no time in seizing the moment to rock Slappy’s world. And oooh was she finding it rocked Damn good as Slappy rode him cowgirl style, moaning deeply and lewdly with little to no shame. Her furry tits bouncing hypnotically as the Imp’s hands were squeezing her furry booths and sensually rubbing her swaying tail. That absolute unit of a dick of his hammering away as the squirrel saw a rising and falling bump indicating how deep his length and girth was hitting her.

It was enough to make Slappy wish she was a few decades younger just so this stud really could put a baby in her but all the same, he really knew how to make a woman feel horny. The silver squirrel relishing any and every moment he would cum inside her as they went through a variety of positions. A minute man he was not, no wham bam thank you ma’am here as even took it anal and oral, especially loving when he’d fuck her face as if her mouth and throat were an onahole. It was like he was fucking her as if his life depended on it which unknown to her, it literally was!!

Eventually after what felt an eternity, Moxxie checked his watch to see he had between 5 to minutes remaining on the bomb. Hips blurring as he was taking Slappy doggy style, the intensity and pace so bliss numbing that Slappy couldn’t help but fall into a prone bone position. Ass jiggling as her eyes glowed with pink hearts showing how pleasure overboard her brain was, her face a very rare expressions of fucked silly no fan had likely ever seen on her eben in her porn career. Before she felt the sweet embrace of unconsciousness take her as she came together with the imp one final time, sleep taking her as she basked in the afterglow.

Slappy:*mumbled into her pillow as Moxxie scrambled to make his escape, cock withdrawn from her slit as he rushed to grab and gather up his clothes.* “Daaaamn little man, if I was to die right now? I’d have no regrets…Fucking, A…”*So out of it that she hadn’t realised anything amiss or notice Moxxie jump right through her window. The imp running far away fast as he could, calling Millie or Loona to open up a portal back to Imp City. Just in time as the timer hit Zero, Slappy’s treehouse going up in a flaming mushroom cloud implosion.*

Over the next few days, The living world headlines were running amuck with the news of the sudden and shocking passing of Slappy Squirrel, most chalking it up to a possible gas leak at the least or a hit from one of her enemies. Down in hell, to be precise IMP’s office in Imp city, Moxxie, Millie and Loona were enjoying a rare bit of peace and quiet. The former Especially needed it given he was coping with having survived getting caught in the crossfire or the fact he up and actually offed Slappy Squirrel thatnis after he boned her. When suddenly the phone rang as the hellhound picked it up to answer.

Loona:”I.M.P, who do you want dead and why? Make it quick while I actually try to give a fuck…”*Speaking in her usual aloof blunt manner, humming as whoever was on the other end seemed to do something rare. Actually holding her attention and curiosity as she seemed intrigued.*”Ah-huh…mhmm…you don’t say…hang on…” *Moxxie and Millie seemed puzzled as Loona was grinning, giving the latter a knowing look as she set the phone to speaker. A familiar New Yorker accented husky voice speaking up.*

Slappy:”Hey there little man…..”*Moxxie widened his eyes in shock and panic. Why oh crumbs of course the squirrel wound up and no doubt wanted one thing…revenge!!*” Eeh now don’t worry I ain’t mad at you, You were doing a job besides which, I found ol’ Walter and tore him a new one. That’s what he gets for thinking he got the last laugh. Now how’s about you being that cute little Red Devil booty of yours over here and make my afterlife erotic? See you soon handsome…”*Moxxie had the most adorable dumbstruck expression on his face as the sinner squirrel hung up. Before he felt his phone vibrate, fishing it out to find she’d sent him her address…in the lust circle along with a picture of her naked and posing seductively. Millie and Loona looking over his shoulder, quite impressed.*

Millie:0w0”Hey Moxxie can I come along? I want to have a taste of that silver squirrel myself….”

Moxxie:”ooooh crumbs…”

#sketchfan #sketchfanda #sketchfan85 #helluva boss #moxxie #moxxie smut #moxxie helluva boss #millie helluva boss #helluva loona #loona helluva boss #helluva millie #helluva moxxie #slappy squirrel #animaniacs #walter wolf #joelasko

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carolingarts · 11 months

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Okay. I thought of something yesterday because I have movie brainrot...does the fnaf movie confirm midnight motorist game as canon?

Hear me out.

First things first. Yellow hue yellow colors all the orangey yellow. Plus all the costumes we've seen Lillard in are orange and yellow.

(That's a costume below I'll die on that hill. Sorry Mr. Lillard sir for staring at your Instagram too long.)

But see above? Yellow hue yellow lights and color is so goddamn intentional. And when we see Mike he's surrounded by yellow/orangey. But in the light it looks black/blue ish like he's been removed from the legacy.

But also? In this light? DOESNT IT LOOK GRAY?? Also. Yellow tie.

Everyone's been going over color theory between these two but I haven't seen anybody connect it to midnight motorist but this constant yellow hue over all the characters clearly dealing with drama...but the biggest thing.

Everyone remembers the house right? From the leaked photos there was the house in the forest and then most of the kids in the forest. And then Garrett. Getting taken away. In the forest.

Where Midnight Motorist has its grave mound.

Woop.

Here's another point for you okay? The lady's shoes?

Computer enhance!

Gray person in chair. Gray shoes??? Silvery yellow shoes??

So what do we have. We have 1 character *deliberately washed out in yellow*. That's deliberately. The light is super bright. Afton has a connection to yellow

We have two gray characters (lady with washed out yellow gray green shoes, Mike being dark black.) And Garrett in a forest in red. Singled out.

And a family living in a forest and kids. In a forest.

You wanna see something else?

Looking that. And then at this.

Here's my theory.

Afton is a struggling business owner maybe living in his partner's shadow (let's go Jack Black for Henry theory). He's a proud guy but he's burdened by either untreated psychosis or like, he's just on the point of unaliving a couple of screaming kids because *he works in a children's restaurant* but he keeps a hold on it.

Enter his family. He's burdened with glorious purpose and dealing with his own shit (drinking drinking) but he has to be the patriarch and he's on a struggle bus and along comes Garrett. Afton loves Garrett. Hell the whole family does and Garrett, the kid singled out, loves Freddy's. Maybe he doesn't love *FREDDY*.

*I WANNA AMEND THIS* Mike loves Freddy's. Mike is the one that breaks out Mike is the one that loves his dad and wants to follow in his footsteps and his dad is just like kid you are an idiot.

But that doesn't excuse the chances that Garrett loves Bonnie I mean

His dad is Bonnie. He knows his daddy is Bonnie. We only see him *react to Freddy*. He's scared of Freddy. Cue Mike's prank. Afton's wife snaps

Mike is removed from the scenario. I am racking my brain as to how any parent could deal with something like the bite period. Idgaf you know it's an accident no parent could be declared competent after that. Like it's completely impossible.

And in his own way Afton loves his kids but one is dead and one was is removed for his safety and Afton learns his kid is possessing febby and then he goes after the kids at his party and buries them in the forest. That they now also haunt.

So here's a dad who was sort of absent and burdened and kinda massively needed therapy and he has 3 tragedies take place at once. His family is broken. He has to put it back together. So he learns about Garrett and he can't let Freddy's go its his son's tomb and he's running his experiments.(also WHY KEEP ALL THE STUFF IN IT. ITS A TOMB). These are kids that tortured his kid and he's not thinking clearly so he lures Mike, the black sheep who was removed from the family but can't escape his legacy.

So who does he get to help him? Who is he doing his work with? Who is taking care of her beloved dad?

Elizabeth.

Maybe it's Vanessa Elizabeth Afton, maybe it's Elizabeth Vanessa Afton but she's in yellow. She knows all the things. She's got flashbacks. Mike is dealing with unimaginable trauma. He hasn't seen his sister since she was small.

It's 2 siblings reuniting and their 3rd being the only one on top of it.

Cue springtrap. Maybe Vanessa bites it too but she's her dad's right hand but he wants his son back too. He is going to do being a dad right this time. Whatever the cost.

#fnaf movie #fnaf #elizabeth afton #vanessa #william afton #michael afton #mike schmidt #abby schmidt #fnaf movie theory #fnaf movie spoilers #mustard guy #orange guy

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tgcg · 6 months

Text

argument

its a big one

TG: alright this is probably a bust

TG: more i think about it how the fuck do you even make a marinara

TG: can i even alchemise cheese or do i gotta like alchemise the milk and curdle it myself

TG: how do you even curdle

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TG: make a goddamn

TG: curgler

TG: whatever

TG: internet archive gonna pull through

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CG: ALRIGHT DAVE

TG: shit

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CG: YOU BETTER BACK THE FUCK OFF. I DON'T KNOW WHERE IN BULGEMUNCHING VIRULENT FUCK YOU GET THE IDEA YOU HAVE ANY RIGHT TO TELL ME WHAT I SHOULD THINK ABOUT MY OWN GODDAMN PLANET. SORRY TO HAVE TO DEAL A BLOW TO YOUR IMPOSSIBLY INFLATED FUCKING EGO, BUT HAVE YOU EVER CONSIDERED THAT YOUR SIDE-EYE SLACKJAW HOPELESS DEADPAN BULLSHIT BEHAVIOUR IS ACTUALLY INCREDIBLY FUCKING CONTEMPTIBLE AND DOESN'T PUT YOU ABOVE OTHER PEOPLE? HAVE YOU CONSIDERED THAT?

CG: OR DID YOU JUST ASSUME FROM THE MOMENT YOU FOUND OUT I'M A REVOLTING FUCKING MUTANT LOWBLOOD FREAK THAT I'M SUDDENLY NOT ALLOWED TO LIKE THE IDEA OF MY LIFE MEANING SOMETHING AT SOME POINT?

TG: okay you are wildly misquoting me where the fuck did that come from

TG: also you scared the hell out of me

TG: im just trying to science some pizza here

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CG: OKAY THEN, DAVE! EXPLAIN TO ME AS WELL AS YOUR AMBLING ONE-NOTE SMOOTH EXCUSE FOR A 'THOUGHT'SPONGE CAN

CG: IN SOMEWHAT COHERENT TERMS, ALTHOUGH I KNOW THAT'S A TALL ORDER:

CG: HOW YOU SAYING MY ADOLESCENT DREAMS OF BECOMING A THRESHECUTIONER ARE "FUCKED UP AND IRONIC IN A NASTY ASS WAY" DOESN'T QUALIFY AS UNDERHANDEDLY KICKING ME IN THE MANDIBLE PRONGS!

CG: YOUR AUDIENCE AWAITS YOU WITH BATED BREATH! TAKE IT AWAY, M.C. BRAIN HEMORRHAGE.

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TG: okay i dont

TG: know how you got a hold of that phrasing because i said that shit in confidence

TG: get out of my business bro

CG: NEWSFLASH, ASSHOLE: THIS METEOR IS A PHYSICAL, LITERAL LOCATION WE'RE BOTH IN. IT'S NOT A FUCKING PRIVATE CHATROOM. THIS MIGHT BLOW YOUR PITIFUL MIND BUT PEOPLE CAN ACTUALLY HEAR OTHER PEOPLE TALK WHEN THEY HAVE TO SHARE A SPACE! BRO!

TG: ugh

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CG: AND IT'S VERY INTERESTING YOU ACCUSE ME OF MISQUOTING YOU, AND THEN SUDDENLY TURN AND SPOUT FROM THAT SHITTY DRONING GROANSHAFT OF YOURS THAT I'M INVADING YOUR PRIVACY WHEN I DIRECTLY QUOTE YOUR SMARMY LITTLE SHAMEGLOBES!

CG: WOW! TURNS OUT KARKAT IS ACTUALLY BEING GENUINELY FUCKING UPSET ABOUT SOMETHING — WHO KNEW, RIGHT? WHO WOULD'VE GUESSED THAT I ACTUALLY HAVE GENUINE COMPLAINTS TO LEVEL AGAINST THE PEOPLE WHO GO SPOUTING HOOFBEASTSHIT ABOUT ME BEHIND MY BACK TO THEIR ECTOSIBLINGS?

TG: no dude can you shut up a second

CG: I MOST CERTAINLY FUCKING WILL, THANKS FOR THE OFFER! I'M NEVER TELLING YOU A GODDAMN THING AGAIN, SO I HOPE YOU MANAGE TO GAIN SOME WRINKLES TO THAT VESTIGIAL FLAWLESS ORB FLOATING AROUND IN YOUR CAVERNOUS NUGBONE FROM ALL THIS. I HOPE IT WAS WORTH ALL THE EFFORT ON YOUR END.

TG: listen!!!!

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CG: MHM! MY AURICULAR CHAMBERS ARE WIDE OPEN!

TG: jegus

TG: okay

TG: i have no defense for my literal phrasing but how expeditiously did you shadowstep the fuck away after i said that

TG: because that is some shrek tier "princess and ugly dont go together" level misrepresentation of my sweet self

TG: like if this wasnt obviously a heated platonic argument we were having i would probably be digging what the reference even if it was a shitty trope

====================

TG: i just

TG: have been thinking about some things and none of those things have got an iota of a thing to do with you or your blood

TG: thing

TG: man

TG: i dont know why you think id be so pressed about your vein juice its like

TG: a normal ass color for a normal ass guy

TG: and obviously it was a major fucking deal from how you talk about it but it doesnt need to be anymore

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TG: the thing is i just dont like have the same attitude as you about fighting and stuff and thats not something i am getting into right now but i am gonna make it expressly clear

TG: that its just kind of fucked up for me to sit my ass down and listen to someone spew gold and medals and confetti colored shit going googoo all over tall and loathsome ass bloodletters he never knew

TG: and have him tell me he wants to be the best guy at combat since samurai fuckin jack

TG: and thats my capital B business believe me the emphasis is there

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CG: SO IS THIS ABOUT ME WANTING TO BE PART OF SOMETHING YOU DON'T AGREE WITH? BECAUSE THRESHECUTIONERS DON'T EVEN FUCKING EXIST ANYMORE. I LITERALLY COULD NOT DO THIS IF I TRIED AT THIS POINT, SO YOU CAN UNKNOT YOUR “KNIGHTY WHITIES” ABOUT IT.

TG: being anti-military is not my point but damn if it isnt a thing thats probably true anyways so good job sleuthing that out

CG: WHAT IS YOUR POINT, DAVE.

TG: bluh

TG: i just said i dont wanna talk about it man

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CG: OKAY,

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CG: OKAY.

CG: I MEAN. IT FEELS KIND OF IMPORTANT TO THE CONTEXT OF THIS WHOLE UNAMBIGUOUSLY PLATONIC ARGUMENT WE'VE BEEN HAVING

CG: WHICH I'M RELIEVED WE AGREE ON BY THE WAY

CG: BUT IF YOU DON'T WANT ME TO KNOW I'M NOT GOING TO WRING IT OUT OF YOU. IT'S FINE.

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CG: …IF YOU DECIDE AT SOME POINT THAT YOU WANT TO TELL ME THOUGH, MY RUMBLE VESSELS ARE STILL OPEN.

TG: i swear youre making those up on the spot at this point

CG: I'M KEEPING MY LANGUAGE'S ART ALIVE, DAVE. IT'S BASIC DECENCY TO THE PLANET THAT RAISED ME.

TG: heh

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TG: yknow we got these things called anatomical snuffboxes

TG: its got that right amount of vague nose wrinklage to it that i feel like youd be right at home saying that

TG: snug as a grub even

CG: WHAT PART IS THAT???

TG: its that little weird bone bit that sticks out on the back of your palm when you flex your thumb right

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TG: look

CG: HUH. LOOKING AT THAT IS KIND OF WIGGING ME OUT.

TG: yeah its kinda gross rose told me about it

TG: but anyways

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TG: are we cool

CG: I MEAN… I GUESS SO. YOU WEREN'T ACTUALLY INSULTING ME, RIGHT?

TG: hell no dude never

CG: OKAY. I COMPLETELY RESCIND THE MYRIAD OF WAYS I JUST INSULTED YOU. AND I'M SORRY.

TG: nah i know its just fluff at this point

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CG: I STILL DON'T APPRECIATE YOU TELLING ROSE THINGS I SAY TO YOU IN CONFIDENCE. THAT WAS BETWEEN YOU, ME, AND MY NOW NON-EXISTENT HOME PLANET ROTTING AWAY TO A CRATERED GRAY HUSK IN ANOTHER DEAD UNIVERSE.

TG: i swear that was like the only thing its just that she gets it and i cant keep my mouth from going on about the gettable stuff

TG: they call me the babbling brook the way my flows so audible

TG: i wont do it again

CG: NO,

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CG: I GET IT HONESTLY.

CG: I'M BASICALLY THE NUMBER ONE PROPRIETOR OF AIRED GRIEVANCES IN ALL OF PARADOX SPACE AND THEN SOME, AND I'D ALSO BECOME ITS BIGGEST HYPOCRITE IF I HELD IT AGAINST YOU.

TG: thanks

TG: but i mean

TG: at the gigantic risk of sounding uh

====================

TG: ………..

CG: ?

====================

TG: well

TG: i kinda just think youre better at being a guy to chill out and watch movies with than a guy to tangle fists with

TG: and i dont think theres anything wrong with being that

TG: i think its cool

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CG: …THAT'S AN ALARMINGLY BRAZEN OBSERVATION TO MAKE OF SOMEONE YOU'VE KNOWN FOR ABOUT THE SPAN OF SEVEN SEASONAL EQUINOXES, DAVE.

TG: i dont know what that means but it sure is probably

CG: AM I ALLOWED TO ASK WHAT EVEN GIVES YOU THAT IMPRESSION????

TG: i just got that inkling about you man

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TG: and you can do whatever you want with that info

TG: throw it in the load gaper or whatever if you want i dont really care

TG: give it a swirly and slam it in a locker call it a nerd break its glasses whatever

TG: but beyond this whole lord english thing weve got going on i am pretty content to never aggress my fellow man slash alien slash monster again if i can help it

TG: i think thats pretty fair given what thats been like so far

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TG: and yknow its cool to have some company when im waxing emotional over the narrative depth of click starring adam sandler which we are watching next by the way

CG: UGH, FIIIIIIIIINE. JUST TO MAKE UP FOR CALLING YOUR THINKPAN SMOOTH AND SUPERFLUOUS.

====================

TG: score

TG: we should argue all the time

CG: SNRK

#davekat #dave strider #karkat vantas #homestuck #meteorstuck #comix #argument

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