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rmorde · 3 months

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With talks about RCT output and worries about Shoko getting shafted regarding her powers... let's see the rough translations.

Warning: Spoilers

Sukuna: No, when you use RCT on another person, the efficiency is usually less than half compared to when you heal yourself.

Kinda make sense? It was already established long ago that RCT is incredibly difficult to pull off.

Shoko doesn't have any Innate Technique. Since her name implies that she is not part of a clan, she likely has no Inherited Technique either. So all she has is usage of Reversal (RCT). Considering how highly valued she is by the school, she must be incredibly good at it.

Now, her feats were said to be healing and re-growing limbs. However, we saw how Toge is still missing an arm and so does Hana. Maki is also heavily scarred.

But it's not all failures tho, Shoko is the one that healed Nanami after fighting Mahito the first time and he seemed perfectly fine the next day. Another example is Geto who was severely injured in the afternoon, but was back to normal within 24 hours.

And... that's about it. We do not have any further clue regarding her powers. This is both a boon and a bane.

Let's start with this lack of info as bane.

Sukuna: Her RCT isn't even as powerful as me or Gojo Satoru

This is what people are worried about. Frankly, so do I. This devalues Shoko's skill. It is not helped by the fact there are other characters introduced already that possesses RCT.

Sukuna's observation here could be taken as Shoko being not that special after all especially since we do not really have much information about what she can truly do so far. With her confirmed heals being 2 Perfectly Fine and 3 Not Exactly Fine, it may seem Sukuna is right.

HOWEVER!

#1 Sukuna has been wrong before. He has a habit of underestimating people right until he spent a lot of time knowing them through fights.

Case in point #1: Gojo. From fish to the guy he never shuts up about, Sukuna seem to like/respect (?) him in the end. I mean, just an observation here, Sukuna tends to name drop Gojo a lot actually like with Megumi.

Case in point #2: Yuji. Sukuna is practically annoyed with Yuji because he doesn't see any value in him. Yet, in this very recent chapter, he acknowledged Yuji at last! Sukuna hates it but he admits that Yuji isn't as bad as he initially thought.

#2 Sukuna is comparing Shoko to Gojo. GOJO who is The Strongest sorcerer?! IMO, Sukuna is being extremely biased here. Like really?! What did he expect? For every single sorcerer Gojo hanged out with to be on the same level as he is in terms of everything he does?! Then again, Sukuna fucking expected Hiromi to pull off the insane feats Gojo did during their showdown (and Hiromi delivered! My beloved! He was taken away so fast.)

Therefore, Sukuna saying Shoko isn't as great as him and Gojo is not really a downgrade exactly. They're two monsters on an entirely different scale. Shoko not being on their scale is just expected.

Seriously. Wtf is up with Sukuna? He's like a heavyweight champion whining why a featherweight champion (Shoko) couldn't compare to him and his rival (aka Gojo) in punching power right after beating the lights out of a promising rookie (aka Hiromi).

#3 We still lack information about Shoko's RCT to fully judge her. So far here are the solid facts:

She can heal people and help them regrow loss limbs which is legit since they are keeping her away from any fights.

There is probably a time factor for her abilities. -> Nanami & Geto probably got healed immediately by her so they recovered 100% -> Maki, Toge*, and Hana* probably missed the time window to become 100% healed -----> *Maybe Sukuna being the one to maim Toge & Hana is a factor too.

Her power level is not Sukuna/Gojo Grade.

The new info that RCT is only 50% effective when applied on others seems to be a general fact which may or may not apply to Shoko. Maybe she is greater than 50% effective at using RCT on others provided she heals a patient within a specific time window.

This could be copium but we actually haven't seen for ourselves Shoko healing someone. What we often see is the result/aftermath of her work.

I may misremember it (if I am please tell me) but I think this is the only image we have of her actually doing RCT... until she got distracted by Satoru and Suguru's shenanigans with Yaga that is.

I just don't want my baby girl be done dirty. Shoko is THE jujutsu doctor for fuck's sake.

GIVE HER RESPECT!!!

#jjk spoilers #jujutsu kaisen spoilers #ieri shoko #i do not accept shoko slander especially from sukuna!#gojo acknowledged her strength!#we haven't seen exactly how her powers work #i believe in shoko! shoko supremacy!!!

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kenanda · 4 months

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I've been sitting here for an actual hour just staring at nothing while thinking about some of the things I've noticed in my malevolent relisten and I'd like to write them down.

So, today I listened to the episode in which Arthur is sort of evaluated by the kiy's followers in that hotel. I kept thinking about this part because something about it felt really strange to me. I feel like this moment in particular doesn't receive as much attention as it should.

It should have been that guy in the pallid mask there, being assessed by those other cultists. When John first sees the mask, he is reminded of that guy who shot at them in the bookshop, but as far as I remember, nowhere is it confirmed that the guy from the bookshop and the guy from the hotel are the same person.

It could have been different people donning the same type of mask, which makes sense since it's a cult with many followers. But this leads me to thinking that perhaps Arthur is just another mad man being whispered to and manipulated by the kiy.

It's easy to lose sight of the fact that he's yet another a thread in this massive web because he's the protagonist after all, but John himself often warns him that he shouldn't try to apply reason to any of the things that are happening to them because Arthur is just a pawn.

I do believe that arthur is a pawn (and not as sane as he thinks himself to be), but we must also account for the fact that he has to be important somehow, otherwise he'd have remained dead the first time he got stabbed in the guts.

There's something about him that keeps bringing him back into the game, and I reckon this special thing has to do with this assessment he undergoes.

The cultists ask him about the decisions he's made so far in situations that have been pivotal to the development of the narrative. Had it been anyone else, the cultists surely would have asked them about their decisions as well, which suggests that what's actually important here isn't exactly the person but rather their choices and how these choices contribute to the development of a much wider web of events.

The guy in the bookshop was looking for john's book; the guy in the hotel was there to be assessed by the cult and (I assume) gain the right to descend into the Dreamlands; Arthur's actions have led him closer and closer to the kiy than anyone else.

They all seek to be closer to the kiy (see the number of mad people jarthur kept running into, which I refuse to believe were mere coincidence or bad luck). The difference here is that only Arthur was able to truly get to the kiy in the end.

The guy in the hotel fell short of it, and when faced with the choice between running from his enemy and accepting death, he chose to slit his own throat (much like Arthur later down the road).

John reads from the paper where their entire story is laid out and offers Arthur the choice to run or to hide, and Arthur chooses to try his luck. Again and again, arthur decides to run towards danger rather than away from it, and we're reminded time and again that this is not free of consequence.

Be it on Arthur's psyche or on the narrative or on both, fact is that the choice to keep meddling with these supernatural things has enough impact that Arthur remains in this game for longer than anyone else has managed so far.

Remember when John explained that the reason the universe they're in is important is because each choice made in it causes the universe to split into infinite other timelines? I believe that Arthur is acting as a sort of catalyst to this process and he doesn't even know.

It could also be that the more he meddles with this stuff, the more "willing/pliant/susceptible/what-have-you" his mind becomes and thus easier to manipulate.

However, this is something that works best when Arthur is all alone. The first thing john does when he possesses Arthur is kill his friend; the kiy can't fully take over Arthur's mind because Arthur refuses to let go of the memory of his daughter when she was still alive; John's influence over Arthur has grown exponentially weaker ever since Arthur reconnected with daniel and made friends with oscar.

(Of course, there's also the fact that john has become fractured himself, but I have no idea wtf is going on with this little guy so I'm not gonna go into that. Maybe some other time).

With all that being said, I believe that there's one last big important decision for Arthur to make when he reaches the order of the fallen star, before something happens to john and his deal with kayne is fulfilled.

#malevolent #long post #nanda's ramblings #bit of a wank here but i did spend an hour just sitting there and thinking

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rjalker · 2 years

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The Murderbot Diaries and the Nonbinary + Aroace Robot Stereotypes

You can enjoy something and criticize its failings at the same time. The Murderbot Diaries has a lot of issues that need to be addressed.

I've seen people saying "Murderbot isn't actually a robot, so it's not a stereotype for it to be nonbinary!" or "Murderbot has feelings, so that means it's not the aroace robot stereotype!"

And like, okay, people, just because Martha Wells has decided to call SecUnits and ComfortUnits "constructs" instead of "androids" does not mean you get to defend the real transmisic stereotype that Murderbot and yes, literally all the other robot characters in these books fall into!

The "nonbinary robot" is in fact a transmisic stereotype that yes, in fact, 10000% applies to Murderbot, and ART, Miki, and literally everyone else who's a robot in these books. And yes Murderbot is a robot. Androids are just more specific types of robots.

As a warning, this post has over 2,700 words.

I am nonbinary, I'm aroace, I use it/its pronouns, and I'm not human! The problem is not that Murderbot is any of these things. The problem is that Martha Wells can only conceptualize a person being any of these things if they're a robot who is--pardon my french--as smooth as a fucking barbie doll.

Why did Martha Wells make Murderbot nonbinary? Because it's an androgynoid that doesn't have any gender or sex-related parts. Because its sex is nonexistent and therefore its gender is nonexistent because Martha Wells equates sex with gender. This is just a basic fact of the series. Murderbot is nonbinary because it doesn’t have genitals. Literally.

Murderbot is the epitome of the "nonbinary robot" stereotype. Because on top of being nonbinary because it has no sex and thus no gender, it's also aroace. Because that’s also a fucking stereotype.

The nonbinary robot stereotype would not apply if Martha Wells' view of gender extended beyond "sex = gender" in any meaningful way, but it very clearly does not right now, because if it did, we would not be six books into a series filled with nonbinary robots, and then have only one nonbinary human so far, who only appeared for a few scenes and doesn't really do anything before being shoved off-screen until te gets another sentence right at the end of the book.

Not to mention there is literally no sign of an aroace or even just aspec in general human characters.

And no, people I know who are now dying to jump in with examples that don’t work to try and desperately excuse this, a character just /not being in a relationship that the narrator knows about/ does not make them aspec representation, especially since Murderbot does not give enough shits about romance to keep track of any of the other characters’ relationships besides mentioning that they’re in a relationship every once and again.

Not being in a relationship does not mean a character is aspec representation.

You can headcanon them as one, but that’s not the same fucking thing as a character being conciously and purposefully written as aspec.

None of the human characters we’ve met have ever even implied they’re in any way aspec.

And we only have one single confirmed nonbinary human in over six books now. And te only appears for a tiny fraction of the book and isn’t even the main human who gets to go on a deadly adventures with Murderbot.

(and seriously I will literally go in and fucking highlight every scene where Rami is actually there doing stuff when I'm done posting this and I will post the grand total of ter contribution to the fucking book just to drive this point home.)

And to make it extra crystal clear here, the problem here is not that Murderbot is aroace and nonbinary.

The problem is that we've had six books now, and yet somehow the only nonbinary human character was all the way back in book 2, and te only appeared for a few scenes and didn't do much of anything before being shoved off-screen and out of the story.

And no, no, contrary to optimistic belief, the random single-appearance background character humans that appear for a single scene that Murderbot apparently arbitrarily uses they/them pronouns for do not fucking count as nonbinary human representation! Not when literally no one in these books has ever fucking asked "hey what are your pronouns?" or even just fucking listed their pronouns in their bio! Not when none of our main or even just reccuring human characters are nonbinary! Not when none of our main or even reccuring human characters use they/them pronouns!

I keep seeing people saying this book has "great trans rep" and no, it literally objectively does not. In order to have trans rep it would have to have trans characters who exist for more than five seconds.

Murderbot is not trans.

(Not unless Martha Wells decides to impliment the best-case-scenario quick-retroactive-fix of revealing that "no, Murderbot, your experiences are not universal to all SecUnits, most SecUnits have genders, including binary genders, and feel sexual and romantic and other forms of attraction, you’re just literally aroace and agender”)

It’s a nonbinary androgynoid who was not given any sex or gender related parts or assigned any gender at construction at all.

No one in-universe has ever assigned a binary gender to Murderbot.

(Oh, but the transmisic and misogynistic fans love to say it’s a man, because they hate both nonbinary people /and/ women!!!! They think nonbinary people don’t exist, but they also think that women are too weak and timid and delicate and frail to be sarcastic, so clearly, Murderbot has to be a man!!! /s)

Murderbot is a nonbinary androgynoid who was, as of book 6 so far assuming Martha Wells doesn’t do the above retcon/fix, assigned genderless at construction.

That is not trans representation by any stretch of the imagination.

In order for Murderbot to be trans while being assigned genderless at construction, it would need to have a gender, either binary or nonbinary, that’s not literally just agreeing “yeah I’m genderless like you said when you built me”.

It’s not even really nonbinary representation because unlike Murderbot, we, real nonbinary people, don’t get the privelege of everyone respecting our identity and pronouns without question or ever even needing to be taught what it means.

We do not have the privelege of being born into perfectly androgynous bodies or bodies that perfectly fit how we want to be perceived and be, that no one assigns the wrong gender to, ever.

We do not have the privelege of our preffered pronouns being assigned to us at birth and literally everyone respecting them all the time even when they hate us. (oh, except for one (1) guy who was being an asshole in a short story from the perspective of another narrator.)

Murderbot has never had to and probably never will face any of the issues that real world trans and nonbianry people face. It never has to correct anyone when they assign it a gender. It never has to deal with being misgendered while trying to figure out whether it’s worth it or too dangerous to speak up and correct people. It’s never had to come out or explain the very concept of its existance to people.

Murderbot literally never even has to fucking tell anyone what its pronouns are because everyone just fucking knows without asking!

And not even because it’s fucking listing its pronouns in its feed bio, because Martha Wells, despite living in 2022 and listing her pronouns in her twitter bio, still hasn’t grasped the concept that her characters in her scifi setting where they literally have their social media bios attached to them should also fucking be listing their gods damned pronouns instead of listing their sex, especially when her protagonist is literally nonbinary.

If you, as a trans person, want to write an escapist fantasy where everyone always magically knows what everyone else’s pronouns are without ever having to ask and being trans doesn’t ever impact /literally any aspect of anyone’s lives ever no matter how small, not even something as simple as talking about pronouns, you can go ahead, but even if Martha Wells comes out as trans tomorrow, that’s not going to erase or make any of the transmisia in this series or in her older works (specifically, The Books of the Raksura) any better.

If Martha Wells wants to make her writing not “Literally Just Bigoted Stereotypes” then she needs to close the writing document and read things by trans and nonbinary people at the very least, and preferably actually talk to some of these people. Even if she comes out as trans tomorrow, that doesn’t mean she magically knows how to not be transmisic. Trans people aren’t a hive mind, we don’t all magically understand eachother and magically know how to treat eachother with respect.

Having the only reccuring nonbinary and aspec characters be robots? Introducing a character who uses neopronouns (who is also literally the single solitary human nonbnary character in the whole series) only to almost immediately shove ter offscreen, never to be seen again except for one more sentence at the end of the book? Never having any of the characters whose social media profile are literally accesible at all times ever list or give their pronouns?? This is not treating people with respect.

The solutions to these problems are so unbeleivably basic. Literally all she needs to do is make one (or more!! literally!!!) of the main human characters come out as nonbinary. And note I said “come out as nonbinary” not “reveal they’ve been known to be nonbinary this whole time but no one bothered to mention it”. One of the main humans literally just needs to figure out they’re nonbinary and tell everyone about it.

More nonbinary humans need to exist in the backgrund, and no, not just by using neutral pronouns for them without prompting, by having them either say they’re nonbinary or just by having people fucking specify what their pronouns are, either in dialoge or via their fucking social media profile that are, and I cannot stress this enough, literally floating along with them wherever they go.

There is no fucking excuse for the characters not listing their pronouns in their bios. It’s 2022. All Systems Red came out in 2017. Prounouns In Bio™ has been a fucking established thing for well over a decade now. There is no fucking excuse for it not being utilized in this series to you know, actually represent the real things trans people and their allies do in real life???

If your story isn’t even going to deal with or discuss even something as simple as pronouns in literally any way at all, you don’t get to call it trans representation.

Murderbot doesn’t need to be fucking hatecrimed for being nonbinary or misgendered for it to say, “My pronouns are it/its”. or for it to even have /literally any kind of reaction at all/ to being called “mom”, which is a word with heavy gender connotations. It would not be a problem if this were thought through in any way, but it’s literally not aknowledged at all.

Murderbot has literally zero reaction to being called "mom", even though with it being vehemently genderless it should have /some fucking reaction/ to being called a heavily gender-connected term, even if that reaction is just thinking, ‘well, I’m not a mom, but close enough I guess, because I’m too lazy to search my databanks to find an alternative word and also I’m embarassed because I literally just insisted to ART that I’m not her caretaker”, or “why did she call me her mom that’s weird”. It literally doesn’t even have to be a negative reaction. Nonbinary people can be moms. It does not have to have a negative reaction. It just has to have some fucking reaction. The books need to just fucking aknowledge gender outside the “well I don’t have any genitals so therefore I have no gender” bullshit. Like do I really have to explain to people why it’s transmisic that the only recurring nonbinary characters are nonbinary because they don’t have genitals. Do I really need to explain why that’s transmisic. Do we really need to go back to Trans School 101 where we learn that what genitals you have do not determine your gender?

Because this is just Moon arbitrarily fucking assigning genders to people based on their genitals again.

Here’s a literal quote: “Looking at him more closely, Moon realized he was actually female, or some gender close to female. The dark color and roughened texture of her skin made detail hard to see, but there were breasts under the clumps of white hair trailing down her chest and shoulders.”

This is from 2015, only two years before All Systems Red was written, and this is just one example of too many to count from The Books of the Raksura series.

There’s also another character whose pronouns and name Moon never fucking asks for, and since he can’t see what their genitals are under their clothes, he literally just spends every fucking interaction with this character arbitrarily assigning them either “he” or “it” pronouns depending on how much he wants to literally murder them at the moment. Go ahead and guess which ones he calls them when he’s resisting to urge to literally disembowl them for no good reason. Go ahead and guess. I’ll give you a hint: it’s not “he”.

So go ahead and tell me how going “oh this character has breasts that means they’re a woman” and ‘oh none of these characters have any genitals at all, so that means they’re all nonbinary”.

This is literally just equating sex with gender. This is no fucking different from saying all people with penises are men and all people with vaginas are women and anyone in between is automatically nonbinary.

The paragraph of Moon randomly fucking assigning Ghatli pronouns and gender came out in 2015.

All Systems Red, where it’s established that Murderbot is nonbinary because it doesn’t have any genitals, came out in 2017.

It’s now 2022, 7 years after the example from The Books of the Raksura.

The Murderbot Diaries aren’t /as/ transmisic as The Books of the Raksura. Murderbot doesn’t go around checking people’s genitals and looking to see whether or not they have breasts before it decides what pronouns to use for them the way Moon did. But that’s the only real improvement. Even Moon at least admitted he was arbitrarily assinining people genders based off his impression of their personalites and what he can see of their body.

The Murderbot Diaries has a nonbinary protagonist who is aroace, but the only reason it’s nonbinary and aroace is because it doesn’t have any genitals. Literally.

That is not groundbreaking representation. That’s not bringing anything new or interesting to the table. That’s literally just. A stereotype. And nothing else in this series makes any effort to make it less of a stereotype.

“Why does the nonbinary robot stereotype even matter?” you might be asking.

Beause real nonbinary people have genitals. We have secondary sex characterisitics. We were not born into this world perfectly androgynous and grow up to be perfectly androgynous with zero effort. We don’t get to have people magically know what our pronouns are before they even say a word to us through no effort of our own. Even if you wear a pronoun pin, you’ll probably still get misgendered because a lot of people who do not spend time around trans people just do not even grasp what “my pronouns are it/its” even fucking begins to mean. They have no idea what you’re talking about when you say “My pronouns are____”.

The nonbinary robot stereotype is bad for so many gods damned reasons and Martha Wells is not doing anything to make up for that.

I will stress this again so no one can ignore it: The problem is not that Murderbot is nonbinary and aroace. The problem is that no humans are and no robots aren’t.

That’s the problem.

And no, this does not mean you get to erase Murderbot’s nonbinary or aroace identities or change its pronouns. Murderbot’s pronouns are it/its. It’s nonbinary. It’s aroace. These are fact that are not up for debate.

I’m making this post because the only way these things can improve is if they get pointed out as bad things in the first place. If I knew how to contact Martha Wells I would write a polite and detailed email explaining these things but alas! That’s probably not going to happen!

So for now I’ll just keep posting 2,000+ word essays on tumblr hoping that at least one person in this fandom reads them and starts noticing these things too so the fandom at least can engage critically with her writing with the bigger picture available of where she’s come from and what direction her writing needs to move in if she wants to stop being transmisic!

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casspurrjoybell-27 · 6 months

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Claimed by the Beast - Chapter 25b

*Warning Adult Content*

One Taste - Part 2

- Knox -

Knox enters the clubhouse and takes the stairs two at a time to get to his bedroom.

Unless Hayes has a death wish, Knox shouldn't find him lingering around there.

That doesn't mean the universe doesn't get off on fucking with him.

The distant echo of Hayes' laughter, light and carefree, spurs Knox to move faster.

His boots thunder against the floor as anger pounds in his temples.

He turns another corner and begins crafting an apology to offer Gavin for the inevitable outcome that's about to happen, him killing Hayes on the property for being a horny prick that crossed the line.

Everett belongs to Knox.

Everyone knows this.

And surely Everett told Hayes as such.

Surely he...

"I fucking knew it'd only be a matter of time before you tracked me down," Hayes laughs.

He's leaning against the wall opposite of Knox's closed bedroom door, one hand shoved in his pants pocket while the other holds his cell-phone up to his face.

"Did you know they made pet cameras so you can watch your fur babies when you're not at home? Milo, my dog, just..."

"I don't give a shit about your dog," Knox interrupts. "Why the fuck are you up here when you know this portion of the house is off limits?"

"I really don't understand why he likes you," Hayes says, rolling his eyes. "Everett and I were bonding over our shared love of True Blood when a flying fucking football came out of nowhere and knocked his drink out of his hand. His shirt got wet in the process, so he came up here to change it. I merely followed."

Knox raises a questioning brow.

"Without him knowing? Because that's really fucking weird."

"Hold on, why are you trying to make it sound like I'm some sort of creep?" Hayes asks, offended.

"Doesn't matter how it sounds when it's the truth," Knox walks toward Hayes at a measured pace, his voice steady despite the inferno blazing in his eyes. "If you touched him at any point today..."

"You'll what? Kill me? I don't think Gavin would appreciate that," Hayes smirks. "I'm the best washer on your team. No one can flip money as fast as me."

"You're expendable," Knox replies. "And Gavin knows where to look for a replacement."

Hayes feigns a pained expression while placing his free hand over his heart.

"Why do you have to be so mean to me, man? Everett and I are just friends. I haven't even asked him for his number... yet," Hayes chuckles, purposefully stepping out of line. "Besides, he's too soft for someone like you, isn't he? What ever happened to Scar? Did he finally get bored and leave your ass? Shame it's taking Everett this long to do the same."

Knox cracks his knuckles.

"Oops. Did I go too far?" Hayes continues.

Knox takes another step forward.

"Is this one of your intimidation tactics?" Hayes puts his phone away, trying and failing to look unbothered as Knox enters his personal bubble. "If you try to kick my ass for befriending Everett, then you'll only confirm what he's afraid to accept."

"And that is?" Knox asks, calmly.

"That you're a monster with no self-control," Hayes says. "Hell, you'll actually be doing me a favor. You'll push his pretty little ass right into my arms..."

Knox's patience finally snaps.

He moves with the quickness of a striking viper, delivering a slap so vicious that it sends Hayes crashing to the ground with a loud thud.

The man must be a masochist because he wears a bloody smile as Knox stands above him, one foot pressing down hard on his chest.

The wild expression on Knox's face speaks more than a thousand words.

It's one thing for him to be disrespected in his own home.

It's something else when the disrespect gets thrown at Everett.

"You clearly think this shit is a game, so I'll say it one more time."

Knox shifts his weight, applying even more pressure against Hayes' chest, successfully wiping the smug grin off his face.

"You." And more pressure. "Are." And more pressure. "Expendable."

Crack.

"Oops. That sounded like it hurt. Did it?"

"You m-motherfucker. I think y-you just broke one of my fucking ribs," Hayes screams, both fists pounding against Knox's calf and foot. "Get the fuck off me and fight me like a man. I'll kick your fucking ass, you big son of a bitch. Let me up right now."

"You're more of a joke than a challenge," Knox laughs. "But if you want to die today, that's fine by me..."

He removes his foot from Hayes' chest and immediately snatches him up from the ground.

The man tries to fight back for all of five seconds before Knox spins him around and puts him in a brutal headlock that cuts off his air supply.

"I could snap your fucking neck and end all this right now but you don't deserve to go out that easy, so I think I'll listen to you suffer for a little while longer..."

"Oh my God, Knox, stop. What the fuck are you doing?" Everett appears and grips Knox's biceps, tugging hard and accomplishing nothing. "Jesus Christ, he's turning red. Let him go before you kill him. Knox?"

"I know where you live, motherfucker. This isn't over," Knox whispers near Hayes' ear before releasing him and turning around to face Everett. "Did he touch you?"

"Did he what...?" Everett starts but Knox grabs him by the arm and pulls him back inside the bedroom, leaving Hayes sprawled out on the ground in the hallway desperately gasping for air.

"What the fuck is your problem right now? You almost killed him," Everett yells after Knox locks them inside the bedroom. "And what is this about him touching me? No one has touched me today except for you."

Knox drags a hand down his face, trying to calm the rage still boiling inside him.

"Hayes is a horny little bastard that is out to fuck anything that moves. He went too far and showed me his true colors just now," Knox explains. "He can't be trusted and until I speak to Gavin about his behavior, I don't want you talking to him anymore," and then he quietly adds... "Not like he'll be seeing anyone again after tonight."

Everett blinks, visibly confused.

"Listen, I just came up here to change my shirt because I spilled my drink on it. I had no idea Hayes was even out there. And I don't know what he said to you while I was in the bathroom but I do not want that man. Not in any way, shape or form. I'm with you, remember?"

Knox is silent while Everett reaches out to grab his hands, rage still simmering beneath the surface as Everett slowly links their fingers together.

Their gazes remained locked as Everett takes another step forward, removing the space between them.

Seconds turn into minutes and soon the red haze Knox had briefly succumbed to while arguing with Hayes gradually recedes.

Knox's breathing slows, his heart rate steadying as he focuses on the sensation of Everett's touch and nothing else.

"I'm yours," Everett softly reiterates.

He releases one of Knox's hands to trail his fingers up Knox's arm as a different kind of fire consumes them.

"Now put the beast back in it's cage and kiss me so I can prove it."

Knox obliges.

He rests one hand on the nape of Everett's neck, the other wrapping around Everett's waist as he leans down to press their lips together.

It's an unhurried kiss, slow and deep and explorative.

When Knox's grip tightens on his neck, Everett moans in approval, his mouth further parting.

Knox takes advantage of the moment, slipping his tongue inside to get a taste.

One is never enough, though.

Not when it comes to Everett.

"We're not going back outside. Not for a while," Knox says between licks. "Need to get you naked. I'm done fucking talking."

Everett shivers when Knox grabs a handful of his hair and tugs, pulling his head back to fully expose his neck.

"I can show you better than I can tell you," Knox whispers against Everett's skin before nipping at it with his teeth, not deep but hard enough to cause Everett's nails to dig into his shoulder.

"You still trust me, kitten?"

Knox pulls back to look Everett in the eyes.

"Yes," Everett answers with a breathy moan. "What are you going to show me?"

"That you're mine," Knox replies, his eyes darkening with lust. "I've already told you but I haven't exactly shown you. I haven't proven it. Haven't solidified it. And actions speak louder than words, right?"

Everett's eyes widen as he grasps the implications of Knox's words.

"Please. I-I want it."

"Then say it..." Knox kisses him again, the hand around Everett's waist now moving to unbutton his jeans. "Let me hear you, kitten."

"Make me yours," Everett says. "I want you to fuck me."

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the-ghost-king · 3 years

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So I'm not going to start like an Anti-Chiron tag because I don't find that enjoyable personally, but every so often people ask why I dislike him so here's essentially a "masterpost" of my thoughts on that situation for when anyone asks, just so I have it to explain some...

This isn't nearly a full list, and there's many more "incidents" that make me less than fond of Chiron, I don't hate the old man but he leaves a bad taste in my mouth and I'm not a fan of that. He's a very twisted character.

- The Lightning Thief

This quote is literally just after Percy's mom "dies", they're all sitting on the porch of the Big House right after he's finally woken up after days of sleeping, and that's the line Chiron pulls out on him.

That's straight up emotional manipulation which was entirely unnecessary in the context of what Chiron was trying to explain. There wasn't a single reason for that, in the slightest.

Immediately following that, and Percy, who canonically has anger issues, does his best to remain calm, he is immediately threatened by Dionysus, and Chiron doesn't even tell Dionysus off for doing that; Chiron just let's it happen. It's Grover who has to speak up to tell Dionysus off...

The only reason Chiron comes out looking like a old guy in this scene is because Dionysus was so much worse in his behavior, at one point intimidating Percy with his power over madness.

- The Titan's Curse

This is the aftermath of when Nico ran away upon confirmation of Bianca's death. When Percy is telling Chiron about the situation, Chiron wishes Nico had been eaten alive rather than recruited into an army.

He'd rather a child be dead than fight against him, and he openly tells this to other children he's in charge of. If Percy went missing would he have said "I hope he was eaten <3" as well?

I don't blame Perry for not delivering the truth here, it was done in an effort to protect Nico; which wasn't something Annabeth had planned on doing... I don't blame Annabeth for that though either, she's been beneath Chiron so long that she probably doesn't realize the shady stuff he does, and to her "going to tell" probably was the "right" move because she was a child...

But the fact that Chiron believes Nico truly would be better off eaten than alive :/

- Tower of Nero

This quote from Tower of Nero shows that Chiron lied to a bunch of young children (most of them were young because the older campers are largely dead because of the war or too old for camp now). It wasn't just a little white lie that adults sometimes tell kids either; they were walking into battle and he told them it was a field trip.

Did he even begin to explain the danger he was putting these kids in? Did the children understand their situation? And how dangerous it was?

Kayla has been blindsided over the years into thinking that telling children they're going on a field trip instead of fighting a battle is something to make a joke of and not be questioned... (Again, I don't blame her she's only like 12 in the book, but still)

Apollo also agrees, which isn't on Chiron but it's a whole mother reason why I can't stand Rick's interpretation of Apollo...

<><><><><>

This isn't me being like "oh Chiron is the worst most evil character ever" I just think that he has numerous flaws which are largely ignored in favor of the "perfect wise teacher" narrative when in fact Chiron and Dumbledore share a lot of.. Offputting qualities.

I do think that some of the situation is simply a result of Chiron having his hands tied behind his back by the gods some. And he even goes so far as to confirm this in a scene of TLT

However many of the scenes in which he exhibits behaviors like that in my first three screenshots are not related to anything the gods require and are, in fact, of Chiron's own free will.

Some things I would blame Zeus and the council for, such as how he withholds information from Percy to an excessive amount for long periods of time even when Percy straight up asks about things. I could easily see that being Zeus trying to prevent Percy from claiming the prophecy as his own, and I could see reasoning that maybe Chiron had sworn over the River Styx or something similar.

But those things don't apply to Chiron making such an unnecessary comment about Percy's mother so close to her "death". It doesn't explain why he would say he hoped Nico had been eaten out loud, and it doesn't cover the fact that he led children into a battlefield without telling them that's what was happening.

I think the context of Chiron's choices and comments would be different if the campers were older. If they were in their late teens or early twenties for the most part, I wouldn't really have much to say about how Chiron handled the situation.

But this man is in charge of children and extremely young teenagers, Percy is only 12 in TLT, maybe if he would have been 16 or 17 then I could give Chiron a pass, but he wasn't. Within the context of the comment he made in the Titan's Curse, Percy is only 14 and Nico is 10 at the beginning of the book... You don't wish a 10 year old had been eaten alive by a monster no matter how bad you think the alternative is, and if you do wish that you don't say it out loud to a group of other children. In the battle from Tower of Nero we get a quick look at the battlefield, and although Ben's age, and the age of another girl fighting alongside him are never confirmed they are implied to be fairly young, and we know Kayla is only 12 at the time too; yet Chiron told them it was a field trip instead of a battle, limiting the time they would have to mentally prepare themselves for what was coming.

On top of that, the nods the reader gets to the fact that Chiron can't act out against the gods depletes over the course of the series. After TLT the amount of times the situation involves the gods interfering with what Chiron is allowed to say lessens, and by the time the Heroes of Olympus series comes around, these limitations on his speech is almost entirely gone. Yet as seen in Tower of Nero he still does morally questionable things in regards to how he treats the campers.

Like I said, I recognize that in many scenes Chiron's hands are tied behind his back because of the gods.. But there are undeniably things he does of his own free will that are, in the nicest manner, very :/

This also isn't a full list of comparisons just a few notable scenes. I don't think Chiron is equally as bad as Dumbledore, but I think it undeniable that Chiron has some significant flaws built into his character design.

A good character has flaws, and there's nothing wrong with having a character that doesn't always conduct themselves properly or have good intentions- it's actually good writing, and I can appreciate that, but for some reason I find myself personally rubbed the wrong way by Chiron. This doesn't make Chiron badly written, or poorly designed, in fact I would say Rick's Chiron is very well designed in lots of ways, but I just don't like how it's never acknowledged by anyone in the series.

Like I said, I'm not starting an anti-Chiron situation, I just think little events like those mentioned, the way he's built a child army, and how he doesn't even try to plead with the gods over raising the ages on campers being allowed to battle is a little sus. But it more so bothers me that there's no attention payed to this problem anywhere in the books, not even by a side character or Luke, nowhere.

I don't actually care that much and this isn't that important to me, but sometimes people ask why I don't like Chiron and this is basically just my explanation to hand off to them... It's not even so much that I dislike Chiron entirely, he's well written and has his "good" moments, I just don't like the way other characters interact with him and his actions.

It's more a personal beef with him rather than an aspect of poor writing or him "being bad"... PJO in general (and HoO/ToA to a much lesser extent) shows that there's not such an inherent good vs bad in the world, and that sometimes people are victims of circumstances in some situations, or they're horribly misguided in their actions, but the series does a good job of showing those people as human still, and I applaud that.

I don't really know how to tie this up in its entirety, but there's nothing wrong with having a morally grey character who does questionable things and in many aspects it is good writing. I think Chiron is a result of Rick not thinking through the implications what he's doing in lots of situations, and I can see a fairly consistent drop in Chiron's characterization from PJO-ToA which is consistent with most other aspects of Rick's work.

I also want to clarify that if you like Chiron and disagree with me, that's absolutely 110% okay, I just personally dislike Chiron and that's on me. Like my problem with many of Rick's other immortal characters, I think he missed important aspects of them in some manner and slightly (or entirely in some cases) mischaracterized them in comparison to their original myths.. Some of these characters he came around on and fixed their character in many aspects to their more "correct" characterization (like Hera), while others (like Chiron and Apollo) he never quite figured them out. Which is a running complaint I have with Rick so I'm just adding this to his tab.

But yeah, I don't hate Chiron I just dislike him and those are different things, and I don't think it's a bad thing to have a morally questionable character, Chiron just personally rubs me the wrong way and I just wanted to explain that more fully because I've been asked about it multiple times.

Also I apologize for not adding a [read more] to this, it's a complaint of mine often when scrolling through the tags but I'm on mobile currently and don't have immediate access to a computer so~

#pjo #Hoo #Chiron pjo #percy jackson #long post

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slashbitch2 · 3 years

Text

Extra Complications PT3

Previous Chapter

"Don't bother coming back into work tomorrow."

Her words had been replaying in your mind since the final encounter, bouncing round like a taunting echo. It'd only been a week since you'd stopped working at Alchemex, yet had felt like a lifetime of boredom and fatigue. With no job or persistent villain to chase after, if you could even call Liv a villain anymore, there was no reason to get out of bed in the morning, nothing to stop you from moping around your apartment. The days blended into what felt like one long sick day, disregarding the occasional break to rescue a cat stuck in a tree.

Although, your only sickness was of the mind. Whenever you attempted to get some rest, your thoughts would inevitably drift to Liv; the cold, distanced tone to her voice, the look of betrayal in her eyes, how empty the week had felt without her. By the third night plagued with insomnia, you were starting to accept that your feelings towards her may be more than a simple crush. On the eighth night, you decided you ought to do something about it and began to formulate a plan.

Entering the building like you were still an employee would be almost impossible since anyone who left their job was rarely welcomed back with open arms. It'd also be better to avoid the security and CCTV cameras, which you'd learnt used face recognition technology. And finally, locating a security card would pose a potential problem, as walking round the facility until you happened to stumble across a janitor to steal from was unfortunately no longer a possibility. So, what was the solution to all your problems? Vents.

Which is how you found yourself scouring over blueprints like a cliched protagonist from a bygone age movie, but at least the irony hadn't escaped you, and thankfully laboratories generally required a great deal of ventilation, so you had multiple routes memorised by the time the bus had arrived at Alchemex. You'd spent the entire journey on edge, fearful that any fellow passenger might accost you for looking so suspicious. But apparently an agitated figure buried beneath a pile of blueprints wearing a spider-suit underneath a jumper was normal enough to be ignored.

Nonetheless, stepping onto the concrete ground of the car park was a relief which inspired a tad more optimism. Moreover, leaving the burdening stacks of blueprints behind further alleviated some of your anxiety. It felt like a final confirmation that this was your one and only chance, and you weren't about to mess it up. Even as the building loomed over you casting a shadow of uncertainty, nothing could discourage your determination.

There was the remarkable sense that you didn't belong here, though it was a familiar sensation. One that persuaded you to tug the mask over your head before darting toward the edge of the car park. It was your belief that as long as you stuck to the outskirts of the facility, few would pay you any attention while you were out in the open. Therefore allowing you to manoeuvre into position and take the quickest passage straight to Liv's office. Which is exactly what you did.

The first stretch of the vent system was a straight drop, a narrow plunge that went on for longer than anticipated. Like a slide with no angle of inclination and a lot less fun. You hit the metal base with an ungraceful clang, certain that your legs would've buckled upon impact had it not been for the lack of space to do so. Overall an uncomfortable start. The remainder of the journey was a lot of crawling and muscle cramps, your only incentive being the occasional grate to peer down which reassured you that your destination was drawing nearer. Everything was going to plan.

Until you heard her.

Olivia's voice rung clear as if from a dream. It stood out from the general ruckus, initially leading you to believe you were hallucinating, that it was some kind of audible mirage. Yet you refocused your senses and it didn't go away. She was almost directly below you, separated simply by a thin layer of metal. With renewed ambition, you crawled toward the nearest grate as quickly and quietly as possible, frantically lowering your head to find the perfect angle, all just to catch a glimpse of her.

"What do you mean the program hasn't worked?" Liv pinched the bridge of her nose, her words laced with an an uncharacteristic anger. You'd never known her to be an irritable person, she loved her job and every challenge that came with it. Was she uptight? Sure. Passionate? Undeniably. But never angry.

"I've tried rerunning and rewriting parts of the code. And it just doesn't work!" Some poor employee (Mark, if you remembered correctly) was fighting for his dignity below. You could see he was flushing, wildly flailing his hands around as he tried to justify his mistake.

"You've rewritten part of it?!" She repeated, volume rising in frustration.

"I- I thought I knew how to fix it."

"I told you not to mess with my work." She growled, stepping closer.

"With all due respect," He didn't back down, clearly caught off guard and unsure how to deal with an irritated Liv. "it's actually Y/N's work."

Upon hearing your name, you ducked out of view as if you'd been seen. Although, it was evident that this was not the case, so slowly you edged forward to peer down at them once more.

Liv's face had dropped at the mention of your name. But by the time you'd settled back in place, anger was already seeping into her expression, then was suddenly smoothed into disturbingly sweet smile. "Well, Y/N isn't here anymore. So I suggest you keep your incompetent hands off of things you don't understand."

Judging by her vague wording, you guessed she hadn't told anyone the real reason you'd been fired. A fond appreciation flooded your mind. Despite everything that had happened, she still respected your secret enough to keep it. You begun to consider that maybe Liv cared about you as much as you did her. Why else would she lie on your behalf?

Mark muttered an ashamed. "Ok." Then left to try and atone for his mistake.

Liv stayed where she was for another minute before taking a deep breath, shaking off her annoyance, and setting a determined path. You assumed she was heading for her office and were about to follow, but then paused. Was this really the best time for a reunion? She obviously wasn't in the best mood, and if you had to guess, it was likely due to your betrayal. Was it too soon to reappear in her life? You'd arrived here with the intention to apologise and make amends, however, you had no idea how Liv would react or what would happen after. If there would even be an after. She could attack you on first sight for all you knew.

No. You'd come too far to turn around now. You continued along the vent before you could overthink the decision. It would be foolish to turn around now: the end was in sight, and rapidly growing closer.

Reaching the final grate, you were greeted with the familiar yet new aerial view of Liv's office. It'd remained mainly the same since your departure. She hadn't even bothered to remove your lab coat, which was still carelessly thrown over the chair you'd frequented everyday. And Liv herself hadn't changed much either, disregarding the seemingly permanent anger lines upon her face. She was sitting at her desk, head in hand, mindlessly flipping through a folder. It occurred to you at that moment that she didn't look irritated, rather sad. Another unexpected emotion for her to display.

After a minute, she sighed, tossing the papers to one side and bringing her other hand up to crash forward into. She looked defeated, seeing her this way felt wrong. You honestly preferred the anger because it showed she'd maintained at least some of her usual intensity.

You sighed. It was time to fix this. With unsteady hands you delicately unscrewed the bolts holding the grate in place, careful to make as little noise as possible. It was as you were removing the final screw that you realised something: you had no idea what to say to her. No planned speech or prepared apology, you'd resigned to hoping for a spontaneous burst of thoughtfulness in the moment. You sat there for a minute, fidgeting with one of the screws while attempting to come up with what you would say. Should you start by apologising for breaking in, or for lying to her, or for applying to the job in the first place? You had a lot of things to apologise for.

And unfortunately, the chance to think it through any further was taken from you as the screw slipped out of your hand. You gasped watching it fall, hitting the ground with an faint thud. Although quiet enough for most people to ignore, you knew Liv was too thorough to not investigate. And as expected, following your sharp intake of breath was the sound of a chair scraping against the floor, then footsteps gradually approaching.

Liv appeared below you, bending down to inspect the screw before glancing up. Her eyes locked with yours through the mask and widened in shock.

"Hey." The casual tone to your voice sounded forced and you grimaced. But rather than dwelling on it, you dropped from the exposed hiding place and pulled off your mask. You smiled awkwardly, eyes scanning and overanalysing her reaction.

Liv stepped back to lean on the desk for support. Her mouth was agape, but otherwise her face was worryingly blank.

"If this is a bad time I can come back later."

Still no response. The room was drowning in a tense silence.

"Well, actually I probably can't come back." With no social cues to interact with, you began to ramble aimlessly. "I'm guessing you'll find a way to patch that particular security breach." You gestured up to the gap in the ceiling and laughed lightly. "Sorry about that. I didn't know how else to-"

You're cut off as Liv moves impossibly fast, grabbing your shoulders and shoving you backwards against the wall. A thousand different thoughts run through your mind at once, all wondering what she's about to do. The majority are focused on the possibility that she's going to hurt you in some way, although, even if she did have the intention to cause harm, you wouldn't fight back. You were tired of conflict, especially when it involved Liv.

She was standing close, breathing heavily and saying nothing. You couldn't help but let your eyes flicker down to her lips, the temptation to kiss her becoming increasingly vehement. So instead you forced your attention up to her eyes, which held an air of confusion.

"What are you doing here?" Her voice was deep, full of unvoiced emotions.

You licked your lips, glancing at her mouth one last time. "I came here to apologise. I didn't mean for any of this to go so far."

"You're lying." She backed away slightly and you immediately missed the proximity.

"I'm not! I just-" You stuttered, then admitted in a quieter voice. "I never meant to hurt you."

She inhaled shakily and swallowed, your eyes tracing the movement of her throat. "And?"

"And because I care about you too much to let you think I did any of this on purpose." You lowered your head, her invasive glare becoming overwhelming.

Soft fingers firmly gripped your chin, compelling you to look up. Her eyes displayed distrust, confusion which you suddenly feel the need to wipe away. You wanted to make your affection for her clear, but found yourself annoyingly speechless. All the recurring thoughts and confined confessions that had been plaguing you for a week suddenly gone from your mind. You were infuriatingly at a loss for words. Although, the warmth of her fingers against your skin reminded you that actions speak louder than words.

You leant in slowly, giving her sufficient time to stop you. She didn't move so you kissed her lightly at first, searingly next. Your arm shifted to wrap around her back tentatively and she moaned faintly in response. Although, it wasn't until you allowed her to take control that any remaining anger dissipated. At that point the kiss became bruising, her hold on you tightening as a wave of shared desperation rolled over the both of you. Before the desperation could reach its peak, however, you separated from her.

Liv was almost panting, her cheeks tinged pink and hair a mess. She promptly attempted to kiss you again, though you dodged the advance and she whined. Her mouth latched onto your neck, sucking at the skin there.

Your head fell back against the wall, dizzy from lust. "Does this mean I can have my job back?" You quipped, running a hand through your hair.

"Depends." She murmured in between kisses. "Do you have anymore secrets?"

"None that I can think of." You smiled, the prospect of returning to what you'd come to consider as normality was an appealing one. Of course there were things you would need to work through with Liv, and many, many extra complications alongside having a relationship with your boss. But nothing easy was ever worthwhile, and Liv was living proof of that.

"Alright. You're hired."

#olivia octavius x reader

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indecisive-v · 3 years

Text

NINJAMUFFIN DOING ANOTHER AMA ON TWITTER, HERE'S MORE SHIT FOR YA! keep in mind i'm just sharing the funkin related stuff, though i am including WAAAAY more than what i shared before 👍 go check out ninja's twitter profile for questions about stuff like ritz! questions in blue, answers in orange. if yall don't wanna read everything i MIGHT make a version of this post where i replace the answers with my own summaries of em (and if the questions are long, those too)

and here's a link to the ama tweet itself! dunno if it's still goin

Q: I figure the answer will be yes but do you have more plans to implement more guest appearances from people in the newgrounds community into FNF? Or are you all gunna focus on OG lore and stuff going forward

A: for guest appearances, I think we have always seen it as getting a healthy mix of both. PERSONALLY I'd like to lean towards having more OG stuff than guest stuff, BUT it's all a matter of what other boys think of that as well. I'm not the sole person working on game!

Q: Are you gonna release the full FNF game or are you gonna be releasing week after week? Like, are you gonna release week 8 or are we gonna wait some years until The Full Ass Game comes out?

A: Release plan for FNF right now is a few more updates or whatev to the 'demo' we have out right now, and then a long silence of probably no updates whatsoever until the full game is done (which will likely be a few years). That's partly why we made kickstarter for game.

Q: Hey so like, how much will Fnf cost after it's finished? And when will you ask the supporters what they want the game on?

A: It's all subject to change, but right now it prob gonna be standard 15-25$ lil steam indie game.

We will ask Kickstarter pledgers and whatnot what they want the game on SUPER close to when its released, to keep options open if we get onto anything like a console people want.

Q: 1. how was your day

2. are you releasing a week 8 song early like week 7, or are you goin full lockdown

A: I am doing GOOD today, and I think recently I've been good in general.

up to the mood, but so far we doing good about not having anything leak or whatev, so I think it'd be fun to have update come out with people not knowing what to expect at all. Build dat intrigue

Q: Will fnf ever get official plushies?? Seems like an untapped market

A: FNF plushies will prob happen some point, we have a lot of current merch stuff on our plates already though! (Mostly kickstarter type stuff, shirts, pins, posters, and all the physical OST stuff) Its a lot to sort out, but in time more and more stuff will happen. We r jus 4 boys!

Q: did you ever expect your game to blow up as it did? what was your first reaction to seeing it become super popular

A: FNF never had a humble moment, literally day 1 before the prototype even came out, the vid on twitter had like 5K likes overnight. Then when ludum dare version came out, it got 5K likes again, like it wasnt just a fluke. Was crazy, and def felt like somethin was different wit FNF

Q: Do you plan on getting other people to come in to help with the music? That seems like a lot of work to dump on one person, what with the erect mode and whatnot.

I guess the question could apply to all aspects of development. Will you be bringing on more people to help?

A: We definitely are getting help from other people. We are always keeping an eye on people for various different things. In terms of programming, already I've gotten 2 people (MtH and Geokureli) to help with certain Week 7 stuff (charting/polish, and loading stuff). Shit like dat

Q: Oh, also, will the Steam version be Workshop compatible? That'd really help streamline the process of downloading mods.

A: Steam version of FNF will likely NOT be Steam workshop compatible, because we want all the mods to NOT be spread out through different places. There WILL be modding support that is as streamlined as Steam workshop though. Mainly for non-steam versions of the game!

Q: Are there any chances that the game will have a physical release? Also any updates on a switch port? I remember one of you guys talking/joking about it.

A: Not impossible for FNF to get a physical release. We would want to see how far we could go with it though. I think it'd be super easy to do something wit people like LimitedRun games or whatev, but I think stuff like that can only go so far. I wanna see Funkin in mf Walmart!!!!!!

not that LimitedRun isn't going to be an option! Just we consider and pursue many different things! FNF release is years away, so we have time to think about everything. Whole mindset can be different just a few months from now.

Q: Out of curiosity, how are you dealing with all the popularity? It blew up so fast id barely be able to handle it if I was in your shoes.

A: The only way I've been able to handle it is having the other boys on the crew and being able to talk to them about all the overwhelmingness.

Part of it feels very lonesome, feels like NO ONE can come close to comprehending exactly how I'm feeling, except them. also other PALS!!!

Q: Do you own any of the bootleg FNF merchandise? Like any bootleg plushies or anything?

A: i dont, i genuinely think they r a waste of money, and I know any bootleg shit that gets made, we can prob go about and make it, and make it 100x cooler because we actually put effort into shit. bootleg shit just in it for the coin, so they aint gettin that from me

Q: How did you go about getting in contact with sr pelo for skid and pumps vocals?

A: Pelo i think was familiar and pals wit PhantomArcade a bit thru various Newgrounds things and collabs and whatnot.

pelo retweeted the first OG FNF posts first ever, and brought a LOT of attention to it. to pay him back, we put skid and pump in game! ask dave for more info prob

Q: what's the plan for having the full ass game open source if it's gonna cost money? couldn't people just download the source and compile the game for free?

A: when FNF is fully released, the full source code will be released as well.

the game will be DRM free so it will be way easier for people to redistribute the released/offical .exe instead of compiling it, so that's not the issue anyways. people will pay for things if they like it

Q: What are the chances of it getting on consoles like switch or Playstation, ps5 would definitely be my preferred way to play

A: it'd be a matter of hiring someone to build out backend stuff for those specific consoles. someone who knows their way around all the wacky code stuff, AND knows console hardware stuff. Then its just a matter of hittin up those console manufacturers (Sony, Microsoft, or Nintendo)

the CLOSEST one is SWITCH. pretty much all of that backend is already made, so it just a matter of gettin all that access and shit.

i think in any case though, there's a lot of NDA stuff required, i dunno how much we'd be able to talk about it even IF we get that stuf sorted

Q: any ideas of releasing it on epic store or another platform?

A: Right now, the only thing that is 100% confirmed and WILL happen is a Steam version, itchio version, and mobile versions on respective app stores. Other storefronts aren't out of the picture though, but we don't want to spread ourselves too thin with it.

Q: Will you continue using HaxeFlixel to make the rest of FNF?

A: yes, because it is what I'm the most technically proficient in, and generally is VERY flexible. just a matter of ME becoming a better coder. It's ALL open source, so if I need something done a certain way, either I can do it, or we can hire someone to do it.

Q: have you seen game theory's videos on your game yet and if so, what do you think about them? (not talking about his predictions because i dont want spoilers. i like mystery)

A: it is always good silly fun to watch the Game Theory vids about Funkin with some pals, and see what matpat thinks of the game. i lov the vids, but wish he used my face less! Or at least used a cuter pic of me like this one!!

Q: Ok so: What does the future of FNF look like to you?

A: future of FNF is a rhythm game that not only exceeds every expectation that people have of it, but subverts most expectations and conventions as well.

Q: Do you plan on retouching on older weeks once the game is fully out? Like reanimating sprites, redoing some charting, updating the background, etc

A: retouching and probably overhauling certain aspects is almost definitely gonna happen. Everything is fluid and can be changed (and should be changed when necessary). i dont think anything should be too attached to, especially this early on in development

Q: I honestly do not care if the answer to this is vague as hell to keep surprises and shit lol but… Since Week 7 was the closest we’ll get to a playable girlfriend (still bf controlling tho), do you have plans to make girlfriend playable in spin-off things or just freeplay?

A: wouldnt be out of the picture for a playable GF, i don't think we've had some hard thing AGAINST it. just a matter of what we want out of the game, and what sort of story or whatev we could do with that concept

Q: How do BF and GF manage to meet famous newgrounds characters (such as pico, tankman and the others to come) like is this all in one universe/ timeline or are they being brought in?

A: i think they are all just there existing. i think there's a lot of wacky things in other media that try to justify crossovers, like MULTIVERSE bullshit or TIMELINE shit, but i dunno, its like subspace emissary. Captain Falcon and Olimar from Pikmin just hang out. Shit like dat

disclaimer that all lore shit is in phantomarcade head pretty much and maybe there is wacky dimensions or somethin

Q: Will the game have dlc?

A: its not too unlikely that we'd have expansions of some sort, but i mean right now we plan on packing in as much as we can into base game, and trying to make that as pure as possible.

if there is ANY dlc, i would personally want it to be 100% free updates

Q: How did you meet Phantom Arcade, Kawai Sprite, and EvilSker? And what do you think about the community and its controversies?

A: me and phantomarcade been fukin around NG for years so years and years ago we naturally crossed paths and became pals

about 2 years ago i found kawaisprites music on NG, and started talkin wit him, made Ritz wit him and we fell in lov

and evilsk8r i met cuz of FNF!!!

quik elaborate on evilsk8r, wanted artist for gamejam FNF was for (ludum dare), and OG person i asked wasnt available, so he referred me to evilsk8r, who I have never met or talked to before ever.

#friday night funkin #fnf #fridaynightfunkin

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fruk-and-usuk-soliditary · 5 years

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Why UsUk is Not Incest

Before this starts I would like to say that I have done lots of research on this topic. This will not just be me going "thEY'rE Not BRoThErs uwu I doN't HAvE EviDEncE bUt bElieVe me aNYwayS". No, I have lots of evidence for this subject, and if I did not firmly believe in this I wouldn't be sharing it. I will be taking people's arguments and stating my own view on it based on facts of this universe, as much as I can. I will also throw in some other pieces of evidence that don't exactly refute other arguments, but I feel like are important.

I am open to discussion on any of these, as long as you are respectful and are able to come up with actual evidence as so do I. In no way am I saying you have to see their relationship as non-familial or romantic at all. You are allowed to have that interpretation of their relationship, but I do say you should respect me for my interpretation of it as well. With that said, let's get on to the essay.

Argument #1

"America called England Big Brother, so that means they are brothers."

This is a common one that I see, and I understand why. However, in Japan, when you are calling someone "Big Brother" or "Big Sister", it is a term of endearment. You can say it without meaning "you are actually my brother and we are now related". And you could argue that that's not the case, however, in the manga, this fact is stated right after the panels of Baby America calling England Big Brother.

Another thing to point out is that England refuses the title of Big Brother, because he was overly flustered from the term of endearment, since he is so used to being called everyone's Little Brother.

One more thing about this argument, is that France calls himself everyone's Big Brother. And for us FrUk shippers, yes that includes me, he even calls himself England's Big Brother.

Using this argument, that would say that FrUk is incest as well, when we all know that is incorrect. Italy also calls both Spain and France Big Brother, but they are all not related. Romano certainly doesn't call either of them Big Brother (although Romano and Spain's relationship is also up to interpretation as well).

Argument #2

"England raised America, so he has to be a part of his family."

Once again, a common one I see that makes a lot of sense. However, England never really raised America. He was constantly gone, across the ocean. There are multiple times we see America completely alone and raising himself.

America has raised himself, he taught himself how to grow, and since he's a country, he grew up rapidly. When England comes back to America, he is absolutely shocked by how fast he's grown. This bit is more of an analysis since we don't know for a fact, but I feel like this shows that England was gone throughout America's development. So, while you can still easily have your opinion on this one, I don't think England raised America at all.

One more thing is the scene where England "says" they are brothers in the dub of the anime. However, that is the dub of the anime, not an official canon source. In both the sub and the manga, England never says they are brothers, and in the manga even goes as far as to say that he's more of a mentor or a boss.

Argument #3

"The Funimation poster says that England and America are brothers."

This one is super easy to debunk. This poster is in no way canon, it was made to promote the show. In this poster, we see lines that connect England and America that say they are brothers. However, there is no connection between Canada and England, or even Sealand and England. If America is considered a brother to England, then Canada very well would be as well, but there is no connection. Sealand and England are actually confirmed brothers, but they don't have that connection line. Also, Wy would be considered a relative to England and therefore Sealand, yet there is still no familial connection between them. This shows the inconsistency throughout this promotion.

Another thing to add is that this is not from Himaruya. Himaruya is the creator, and the one who has the final say in what is and isn't canon. He has made no mention of this poster, confirming or not confirming it.

Unless if it comes from the original source, or is confirmed from the original source, nothing is for sure.

Argument #4

"Colonizing equals adoption."

I've seen people say this a few times, however this is far from the truth. If colonizing meant someone adopts another, then that means France's inappropriate behavior towards Seychelles is incest or even England's potential crush on Seychelles is incest. If you want to interpret a colonization as adopting, then that's how you interpret it. However, know that it does not apply to canon.

Other Pieces of Evidence

1. Magical Strike AU

This is a piece of evidence I haven't seen many people talking about. In the Magical Strike AU, a canon AU talked about and made by Himaruya, there are only a few confirmed characters roles. This includes France, the magical girl on strike; Japan, an old man who's touring; Netherlands, a business partner; England, a businessman; and America, the son of the President of the company. In this AU, England and America do not have any familial connections what-so-ever.

Take into consideration that this is from an AU, so it can be argued as irrelevant, which is fair, but it's still something to consider.

2. America's Independence

This is a pretty controversial one, but it still needs to be addressed. During the American Revolution, America shouts "I'm no longer a child, nor your little brother." A lot of people either argue this is America just saying that to state his independence and that they are still related.

However, that would only be true if they were mortal and human. These characters are countries that live forever (until they are killed through the heart/their capital is taken over). They do not have the same meanings for different terms that we do.

America stating that he is no longer England's little brother means that he is literally no longer his little brother. This would obviously not work in real life, but this is not real life. They are not human beings who comprehend things like family the same as we do.

The only characters who have a confirmed family connection (in modern day) is Germany and Prussia, Veneziano and Romano, Iceland and Norway, America and Canada, Netherlands/Belgium/Luxembourg, and England and his three older brothers including Sealand as his little brother.

America never addresses England as his brother in modern day, nor does England. Within modern day, they do not consider each other to be brothers. This is able to occur because they aren't human. They don't have the same thought process as others.

Conclusion

If you don't see England and America as romantic, and see them as familial, that is more than okay. However, recognize that shippers of UsUk don't consider them as family.

Shippers do not look at England and America and think "UwU they are brothers so I ship them". Most shippers ship them because of their connection and relationship dynamic.

All we ask for is to be treated with respect. Hating others for shipping something is ridiculous. There is more to a person than a ship.

#hetalia #usuk #aph england #aph hetalia #aph #hetalia england #axis powers hetalia #axis powers ヘタリア #hetalia axis powers #aph america #hetalia america #aph usuk #hetalia usuk #ukus #aph ukus #hetalia ukus #i'm adamant about my beliefs but i'm still scared to post this but we'll see what happens

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nerdy-novelist017 · 5 years

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Awakening (Joker/Arthur Fleck fanfic)

This is my first Joker fanfic. I absolutely loved the 2019 movie. Joaquin Phoenix deserves an Oscar for his performance. The film was cinematically beautiful The writing was haunting and stuck with me for a long time after. The soundtrack deserves its own Oscar, it was a perfect representation of Arthur Fleck. I just HAD to write something after seeing this movie.

Enjoy!

Ps. Feedback is appreciated greatly!

〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️

She had never wanted this for her life. When she was a young girl, her dream was to be a princes and fall in love with her brave prince charming, just like all those Disney movies had sold to her. The idea that she could live in a perfect world, waking up to birds chirping and animals talking, singing all day and, eventually, falling in love with this perfect, pure person. But it was all a story, a lie told to eager young girls. There was no talking animals. And singing in public caused people to to look at you strangely. And there definitely was no prince charming of any kind. Just a broken world full of broken people just like her. Elizabeth was no princess. She was a prostitute.

Elizabeth walks down the sidewalk of the empty sidewalk. Her shift had started ten minutes ago, for that she is sure that The King would have her head. Her black, strappy heels leaves soft clicking noises as she quickens her pace. Thoughts of how she could slip past her boss races through her head as she rounds the corner to go to the back entrance. She yanks open the door and slips mutely inside. Almost immediately her nose is filled with the obnoxious smell of cigerettes and beer, smells that she has gotten use to in her career. The noises of the club surrounds her with yelling, laughing and, of course, cursing. She feels like it might have warmed up at least five degrees inside from the the crowd of people. Liz is use to this atmosphere. She is use to rude drunks, the sore losing gamblers, and her customers.

She ducks into the back hallway where it leads her to the back room filled with her other coworkers who are lounging on the uncomfortable, velvet couches. The room is dark, and falling apart at the walls. Ugly, cracking gold paint covered the walls with a faux rich atmosphere. The front of the casino was rich and fancy, the back was not.

"Look what the cat drug in," a voice speaks loudly in a thick New Jersey accent. Elizabeth knows who it is without even looking. She can recognize that wretched, annoying voice in her sleep. The voice belongs to a woman named Imani. She is a prostitute in her late twenties, just slightly older than Liz. She's a beautiful, tall, African American girl who had been in prostitution since she was eithteen. Ever since Liz had found Saltwater Casino all those years ago, Imani has made it her personal goal to make her life a living hell. As if it isn't already.

"Dragged," Liz corrects her grammar as she digs around in her purse. Her fingers find the tube of lipstick at the very bottom, under piles of napkins, loose change and packets of gum. She quickly rushes to one of their many full-length mirrors to apply a fresh layer of her favorite red lipstick.

"Oh, screw you, Lizzie," Imani spits as she rose from her lounge. In three long strides, she is across the room, glaring daggers at Liz. Years ago, when Elizabeth had first started working at Saltwater Casino, she would have flinched away from Imani's towering form and beautiful glaring looks. She would have immediately apologized and slunk away like the weak person she was. But that was the past when Liz was just a young girl. Now, she turns directly towards Imani.

With faces just inches away , Liz speaks calmly, "Get out of my face, Imani,"

The room full of girls has turned their attention to the fight brewing. The atmosphere grows tense.

"Girls, knock it off," a strict voice averts all of their attention to the doorway where a larger man stands, arms folded over his large chest. He barely fits in the doorway with his towering height, but where he is tall, he certainly lacks any attractive physic. He's skinny, with arms and legs that look like they have not seen a day's worth of hard work in their entire life. Liz figures he is built this way from the cocaine she knows he uses often. His veins are in a perpetual state of protruding down his arms. However weak he may appear, he is certainly no weak man. She knows this from experience. All of the girls do.

Without missing a beat, Imani takes a step back, throwing her arms open wide, "Mistah King, look who was ten minutes late, yet again. She came in here with an attitude lookin' to start a fight with me as usual."

Elizabeth rolls her eyes, knowing there was no use arguing her side. A few of the others girls laugh, they all knew she was lying, but none bother to back Liz up. It is survival instincts that keep them quiet. Each of them know that if they say anything to her, Imani will make their lives unnecessarily complicated. So, they say nothing.

"Lizzie, walk with me," Mr. King demands as he turns, leaving Elizabeth to slide around Imani and follow her boss out of the room.

"She's lying, I wasn't --" Liz starts once they were out of earshot and down the hallway. The hallway that was decorated with dreadful red and gold wallpaper that warped and peeled in more than one area. It was dim, the wall scorns not bright enough to lighten the hallway. Nothing could brighten the back of the building.

"So you were on time?" Mr. King cuts her off. Liz looks away. Great, he was already in a bad mood tonight.

"Yes," Elizabeth lies, focusing her gaze on a particular bubble of wallpaper that shapes a mangled dolphin. Anything would be better than looking into her boss' cold, dark eyes. She swallows the frog in her throat. She hates the effect he still has on her. The knots in her stomach, the shivers on her skin. She hates the way he makes her feel vulnerable, small.

"What have I told you about being late, baby girl?" Mr. King leans in closer to her as he speaks in a low whisper. Elizabeth almost flinches at his pet name he had given her throughout the years.

"Don't let it happen," She answers, emotionless. Her nose burns from the stench of alcohol on his breath.

He reaches his skinny hand out to stroke her cheek and down to her neck. Elizabeth refuses to cower under his touch. She doesn't want to satisfy him in any way. Instead, she looks him straight in his beady black eyes, "You got a shift for me?"

He is quiet for a long time, only staring at her. Finally, he backs away and says, "Yeah, you're on from nine to five,"

She bites her lip in anger. He has purposefully given her a crappy shift because she had talked back to him. She shakes her head and makes her way to the front of the casino. It is a busy night as usual. It is a Tuesday night, so there is classical music playing in the background as customers gambled, drank or talked. She sits on a high stool where the girls sometimes wait for men who were looking for an hour's escape from reality. She immediately spies her coworker and closest thing to a friend she has.

"Hey, Nat," greets Liz as she moves to sit closer to the young girl at the opposite end of the bar.

The woman looks up from her ciggerette, causing her kinky, blonde curls to bounce slightly at the sudden movement. Her face breaks out into a wide smile, "Hey, sugar!"

"Is that a new shade of lip gloss?" Lizzie asks when she takes a seat.

"Oh this old thing?" Nat's messy manicured nails gestures to her lips, "Nah, I've had this for quite a while. Got it from my second cousin. Anyway, I didn't know you would be working tonight." her southern drawl slurs her words together. She constantly speaks of her childhood home back in New Orleans, where she has inherited her accent. Whenever she would ask Elizabeth about her childhood home, Liz would dismiss it as unimportant or not worth the time.

"Got nine to five," Lizzie confirms as she signals one of the many bartenders to bring her a drink. He's a kind man, often servers her for free.

"Oh, honey," Nat shakes her head in shame, "that is such a shitty shift. He's such an ass."

"It was because I was late, slept through my alarm," she leaves out the part where Mr. King got too close for comfort. It isn't like she is the only girl he has done it to. She's seen multiple new girls go into his office for longer than they should have. She pities them, but doesn't dare speak up against him. She needs this job. It is the only thing she is good at in life.

"Well," Natasha props her elbows on the glossy oak top, "at least you got a good night, there's been a dozen of cutie butterflies that came in earlier. They are all over there, by the slots."

Elizabeth's dark eyes follows Nat's gaze directed over to the east wing, where a group of clean-cut men pool around, cheering on their friend who was about to roll his dice. The two girls have code words for different type of customers. Butterfly is the code for an attractive young man. Because they are few and far between, they have been given the word butterflies. Moths are the name given to just about every other customer. They are usually old, fat and unattractive married men. Moths are ugly and always a pest to deal with, thus the nickname was born.

"I don't know, they seem pretty invested in their game," Elizabeth shakes her head and leans her chin on her palm, resting her elbow on the table top.

"A girl can dream, right?" she flashes one of her brilliant smiles.

As the night progressed on, Elizabeth chats with Natasha as much as she could before one of them would most likely be whisked away by a needy customer. They both have a drink of vodka before their Mr. King could see. Throughout her years of prostitution, she has learned to yearn for a drink to calm her nerves. A couple moths sway through, looking for a date for the night, both girls quickly show them to the other prostitutes on shift.

"Lizzie, you're on room nine, guy's already in there waiting for you," Mr. King appears behind her, eyeing them as if they are threatening him at gun point, "You planning on paying for that, or am I gonna have to take it out of your paycheck?"

"Course, Mister King," Natasha winks at him over the brim of her glass as she downs the rest of the amber colored liquid.

"I didn't even see anyone go in the den," Elizabeth raises her eyebrow in confusion. The den is what the girls called their workspace. Usually it consists of a queen bed and a couple of rickety night stands. It's a sad room where the girls spend most of their nights with various men.

"Let's hope he's a butterfly," Nat smiles in encouragement as she raises her empty glass of vodka, "look good, babe,"

Elizabeth nods, forcing a tight smile. She follows Mr. King out of the main room and moves down the cramped hallway, all the way until he pauses in front of a door. The wood has been painted black with a giant red heart and in the center is the number 9. Before her hand can grab the door handle, a large first curls around her bicep.

"This man is paying very well, baby girl, so don't screw anything up with your woman emotions, got it?" Mr. King spits through clenched teeth.

Elizabeth nods her head, "Got it,"

He releases her arm and takes a few steps back, "Good, he paid for an hour, so that's what your going to give him," and with that, he turns and disappears down the dim-lighted hallway.

Elizabeth knows if this man complained in any way, Mr. King would punish her severely. She runs a hand through her dark chestnut hair to make herself look more seductive. A shaky hand reaches out to grab the door handle again. She curls her hands into a fist to stop the shaking. She is strong. She can do this. Her usual prepping rings out in her head. Opening the door, she is greeted with a dark room, the only light illuminating was the light spilling in from the hallway behind her. For a moment, she actually thinks she has the wrong room. She reaches to flick on the light switch. The lights pop on and she can see his towering form over by the window, broad back facing her.

She gently closes the door and moves towards the bed in the center of the room, "So, you like standing in dark rooms?"

"No," his voice was low and calm. He speaks clearly, without any stutter or shyness. He is sure of himself, "I like the look of the city. When the lights are on, it leaves a glare on the window."

He still hasn't turned to face her yet, giving Elizabeth a chance to see his body. He is very tall, long legs and broad shoulders. Soft layers of black hair spills out around his neck and just touching his shoulder. He is lean but muscular enough to be intimidating. He wears a beige jacket that stretches across his long back. Simple boot cut jeans covers his lengthy legs and finishes at his boots.

Elizabeth thinks he is strange, but she shrugs it off and lays on her side of the bed, leaning one leg over the other, "Are you gonna come over here, or are you gonna stare out the window the entire time?"

His towering form turns slowly, stepping away from the window. Elizabeth can see that he has a sharp jawline, littered with a light dusting of stubble. His lips are splashed with just enough pink hue to make them look full and playfully tasteful. His hooded brows and lack of light in the room conceal his eye color from her.

His feet stop when he approaches the end of the bed. He rings his hands out as if he is nervous. She studies his face for a moment and frowns. She has seen him before. But where?

Elizabeth clears her throat before she speaks, "You don't have to worry about wearing anything. That's already taken care of by me."

She looks down at her cheap clothing, expecting him to want her to start stripping her sheer, black tank-top to reveal her lacy, red bra. She unconsciously plays with a loose thread on the purple bedspread. The nerves always eats through her stomach right before she meets a customer. None of the men that came in for the night are good people. All of them are either drunks avoiding their nagging wives, young men getting a taste of freedom, or even aged men without anyone in their lives. She can't quite tell what this man's tell was.

When he does not acknowledge her, she sits up a little, propping her upper half of her body on her hands, "What's your name?"

He tilts his head to the side, "I'm Arthur," he seems to pause a moment before continuing, "what's yours?"

This causes Elizabeth to pause and stare at him with a small, agape mouth. Hardly any of the men that come through on their nightly livelihood ever ask her name. They don't care. She is just a tool to them, just disposable. "Call me Lizzie,"

"Lizzie," he looks down at his feet as he tests the name on his tongue. An uncomfortable silence fills the room, creating a tense atmosphere for Elizabeth. Usually she is not this uncomfortable and stiff, but this man, Arthur, is forming a very afflictive attitude within her. His presence is unsettling, making her want to get away.

"Um, do you want to sit on the bed?" Elizabeth suggests, motioning to the fluffed pillows.

Arthur cautiously lowers himself to sit on the edge of the bed, furthest away from her as he could possibly be without falling off the side. Elizabeth scoots over to the middle of the bed, laying down on her back and closing her eyes. When he still does not move or speak, She peers an eye open.

"You alright? You only paid for an hour, so..." Elizabeth trails off.

"I paid for an hour in this room, right?" he asks.

"Yes, an hour with me in this room." she confirms.

He looks away from her face, suddenly finding the wood paneling more interesting than ever, "Is it alright if we just...talked instead?"

Elizabeth tilts her head to the side in utter confusion. She is expecting him to request a lot of different things, but she definitely does not expect that to be one of them. When his eyes float back to hers, she immediately looks down in embarrassment. She can feel heat rise in her cheeks. Who was this guy? "We can start with that, to calm your nerves,"

"I don't want to use your body for prostitution, Lizzie," he speaks softly and quickly, "I don't want that from you."

Her head is pounding with confusion as she stares at the mysterious stranger. Most men don't even care for her name, and now here this man is telling her that he doesn't want to have sex with her? Her immediate thoughts were that he is shy to be naked in front of her, hence the lights. "We don't have to leave the lights on, if that's what you mean,"

His face remains straight, "It's not. I did not hire you for sex."

She hears bells of alarm and panic in the back of her mind. This man was so odd, so unpredictable. "Are you a cop?"

He laughs loudly and shakes his head. he looks to be in pain as he covers his mouth with his hand and turns away from her.

Then she suddenly remembers that laugh. That eerie laugh. The same laugh he gave when he was on the Murray Franklin Show. The same laugh he gave before he killed the popular tv host.

She stands so quickly she stumbles in her heels. The door is the only thing on her mind. She needs to get out of this room and away from this murderer. However, she needs to accomplish this sneakily. Who knows what he would do to her?

He notices her change and stands beside her, his laughter has died down. She panics at his towering form and rushes for the door, barely pulling it open before he's by her side, slamming it shut.

"Don't," he growls and she yelps, hand still on the door handle.

"You're him," she whispers, "you're the Joker,"

"You aren't going to run out there and scream for security. I don't get out of jail just so that I can go right back in," he says lowly, his warm breath fans across her face. He smells strongly of cigarettes and a musky cologne. He is so close to her, she turns her head to the door, she doesn't want to look into the eyes of a murderer. Of her murderer.

"Are you going to kill me? My boss is just right down the hall. He and others would here if I screamed." she surprises herself with her newfound courage.

"They don't appreciate you as you should be," he says, "they wouldn't care if they found you dead in this room. You are just a tool to them. Just something to be used to gain them even more money. The rich come in here and abuse you then pay you way below what you're worth."

Tears prick her eyes as she gripes the door handle tighter. Though she knows all this to be true, it still hurts to hear.

She startles when she feels his cold hand slowly turn her cheek to face him. His fingers move to her mouth, his thumb gently tracing over her bottom lip before pulling her mouth into a large smile. He mimics her forced smile with one of his own, "Smile, I'm not going to kill you."

She feels herself being drawn to him, her hands falls of the door knob as he pulls her closer. His eyes, a brilliant green, hold so much emotion. So much pain. So much honestly.

His hands drop from her mouth, and he backs away. It feels as if she can breathe again. She watches him retreat to the bed, sitting alone. She swallows, her throat feels dry as she glances back at the door.

"You can leave," he speaks without looking at her as he pulls a cigarette from its pack, "but we both know you don't want to."

She wants to leave, more than anything. Her mind tells her to run and call the cops. But when she turns back to him, he's sitting on the bed, pulling out a cigarette from its pack. He lights it and takes a long puff from it before putting his head in his hands. He looks so broken, so defeated. So lonely.

"There's nobody to talk to anymore," his voice drops off to a lower octave, "Even before they cut all the funding to those therapists, they never really listened. They never really talk. They didn't care."

She is quiet for a few minutes before speaking with a scratchy voice, "I'm not a trained therapist. I don't know what to say like they do."

"They never knew what to say either. That's why I like you, Lizzie. You aren't like them. You are like me." he smiles at her, and she wraps her arms around her torso uncomfortably.

"I'm nothing like you."

"You can't see it now. You haven't found your awakening yet," he takes another puff of his cigarette and looks away again.

She hesitates a moment before slowing moving into a sitting position on the bed as far away from him as possible,"You paid an awful lot of money just to sit in this dingy room and talk with me,"

He nods, "I know you must be confused, but I paid for an hour."

She is quiet for a few painfully awkward seconds. She self-consciously tugs down on her skirt, no longer confident in her own skin. He sat completely still, as if he were waiting for her to leave through the door. But she doesn't. She needs this job. She needs the money. When she got home last night, her landlord had stopped her as she stumbled into the apartment building at two in the morning. Dan Flemmings was a short, balding Latino . Liz likes to blame the fact that his wife ran away to Belize with his best friend on why he was so mean, but the truth was, he was born to be bitter in this world. He never shows any mercy on her, or any other building attendant, in fact. If your rent was a day short, you needed to find a new building to live. He caught her as she was unlocking her door, ready to shower and sleep for a few hours before needing to wake up and repeat the process all over again. He had been waiting for her.

“You got your rent, Griffin?" his grating voice startled her, "It was due yesterday,"

She kept her emotions at bay, no matter how irritating Dan was when he used her surname, "That was yesterday? Must have slipped my mind."

“You know damn well that its always the first of the month," he stepped closer to her, the fluorescent light hanging above them highlighted his scared top lip, a final parting gift from his ex wife, "I won't make exceptions for you or your sister."

“Got it," she mumbled. She didn't have the money, in fact. She was almost two hundred short. With her food bills and her sister’s medical bills, she did not have enough money to pay for both her meals and her rent.

She needs the money. That's why she stays with the Joker.

“What do you want to talk about?"

#joaquin phoenix joker #dc universe #gotham #romantic #darkromance #joaquin phoenix #my ocs

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