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#my GOD PL EA S DE
iridescentropy · 2 years
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to bury my head in the crook of your neck. to lock my fingers with yours. to run my hands through your hair. to pull you closer by your waist. to lay my hand on your jaw and look into your eyes. to love you. with everything i’ve got.
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whatdoesshedotothem · 3 years
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Tuesday 24 April 1832: SH:7/ML/E/15/0058
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- finis morn[in]g F[ahrenheit] 58° on my dress[in]g tab[le] at 8 10/.. - ver[y] lit[tle] poky r[oo]m b[u]t slept pret[ty] well and feel the bet[ter] for it - br[eak]f[a]st at 9 3/4 - wr[ote] a lit[tle] no[te] to L[ad]y S- [Stuart] for Miss H- [Hobart] to gi[ve] on h[e]r arriv[a]l to say I w[oul]d dine w[i]th h[e]r tomor[row] - w[e]nt out at 10 55/.. (alone - too early for Miss H- [Hobart] to venture out in the so m[u]ch cold[e]r sharp[e]r air th[a]n that of Hast[in]gs) - walk[e]d all r[ou]nd the place - to Calvary park - none admitt[e]d b[u]t by a tick[e]t fr[om] the propriet[o]r who nev[e]r refuses it to respectab[le] visit[an]ts - nice place to walk in - sev[era]l neat look[in]g h[ou]ses there - on[l]y 2 of th[e]m to let - then walk[e]d r[ou]nd and g[o]t int[o] the park n[ea]r the houses - w[e]nt int[o] the ch[ur]ch - ver[y] new and neat plain goth[i]c - serv[i]ce at the ti[me] - w[e]nt in for a min[ute] or 2 - w[e]nt int[o] Sharp’s gr[ea]t Tunbridge ware shop n[ea]r Mount Ephraim (on the Lond[on] r[oa]d) the gr[ea]t court end high airy situat[io]n chosen by all who can get there - In the h[ei]ght of the seas[o]n (July Aug[u]st and Sept[embe]r) apart[men]ts are at a guin[ea] a bed per week (i.e. lits de maître) serv[an]ts beds includ[e]d - b[u]t at oth[e]r ti[me]s and ev[e]n May and June a 12 guin[ea] apart[men]t to be h[a]d for 3 or 4 guin[ea]s - gr[ea]t deal of good comp[an]y co[me] for the east[e]r holidays - a fortn[i]ght or 3 weeks that the houses of parliam[en]t do n[o]t sit - bought a playing card case for Miss H- [Hobart] who dad [did] give me a purse got yesterday at Hastings and a little Tunbridge ruler got last night on our arrival -  she said it was the first thing I had given her since the Denouement (that is the offer and acceptance) - It rain[e]d a lit[tle] - walk[e]d b[a]ck al[on]g the fine op[e]n com[mo]n that seems a contin[uan]ce of M[oun]t Ephraim, and intersect[e]d in all direct[io]ns w[i]th walks br[ou]ght me d[o]wn in front of our hot[e]l - then exam[ine]d the Sussex hot[e]l a new, clean, large handso[me] look[in]g h[ou]se - then met Miss H- [Hobart] in the Pantiles now call[e]d parade and took 2 or 3 turns togeth[e]r there and I tast[e]d the spring a ver[y] weak chalybeate at the near end of the parade - s[ai]d I w[a]s qui[te] charm[e]d w[i]th the pl[a]ce and jok[e]d ab[ou]t return[in]g or liv[in]g there or near - It is really one of the prett[ie]st nicest wat[erin]g places I ev[e]r saw - I sh[oul]d ha[ve] no object[io]n to being there w[i]th L[ad]y G- [Gordon] if go[in]g to Fr[an]ce just now is n[o]t qui[te] practicab[le] on acc[oun]t of cholera - our bill at the Roy[a]l Kentish hot[e]l n[o]t sm[all] consid[erin]g our hav[in]g no wine, and our mod[era]te din[ner] and sm[all] r[oo]ms = 40/2. for our 2 selves and my 2 servants - c[oul]d n[o]t surely ha[ve] been dear[e]r at the Sussex, c[oul]d we ha[ve] been tak[e]n in there - Off at 1 40/.. - pret[ty] dri[ve] (5 m[ile]s) to Tunbridge - beaut[iful] dri[ve] fr[om] T- [Tunbridge] to Sevenoaks (pron[nounce]d Senoks [Se..?] ŏks) and ver[y] pret[ty] to the top of Madame’s court hill ab[ou]t 1/2 way bet[ween] 7 oaks and Bromely and fr[om] all along w[hi]ch a fine look d[o]wn (left) on the rich wood[e]d valley bel[ow] - n[o]t so pret[ty] b[u]t still pret[ty] fr[om] this long hill to Bromley a nice lit[tle] vil[lage] or town en[ou]gh - th[e]n beg[a]n to shew of nearness to Lond[on] by crowds of peop[le] and carr[ia]ges - Miss H- [Hobart] s[ai]d it w[a]s Greenwich fair w[hi]ch w[oul]d ma[ke] so[me] diff[eren]ce - at Whitehall at 6 1/2 - L[ad]y S- [Stuart] w[oul]d ha[ve] me go in for a min[ute] or 2, and th[e]refo[re] I d[i]d oth[er]wise it h[a]d been plann[e]d bet[ween] Miss H- [Hobart] and me n[o]t to do so - 10 min[ute]s th[e]re and alight[e]d at 29 Albermale st[ree]t at 6 50/.. - ord[ere]d tea immed[iatel]y, b[u]t h[a]d to wait for it an h[ou]r - amus[e]d mys[elf] w[i]th read[in]g the 2 last Globes - L[ad]y S- [Stuart] look[in]g ver[y] well, and all kind[ne]ss, h[a]d told me how b[a]d the chol[er]a w[a]s in Paris - I sh[oul]d be mad to go th[e]re now - she has ten times more heart than Miss H- [Hobart] and was all kindness wanted me after all to stay dinner offered me her carriage tomorrow  thought she might have or sorry she had not taken me into Whitehall somehow I could scarce keep up at all Miss H- [Hobart] followed me out saying she hoped I should not go and take on so ‘com[e] give me one good kiss?’ I did and so we parted we had not had much conversation in the carriage  but what we had was well enough tho’ the least thing would have made her crossish but I avoided all this  talking of congratulations ssaid she had not had mine except that I had said I was glad  she said ‘oh I know you are both glad and sorry’  she had laughed and said  shall we turn and go back to Hastings  yes ssaid I directly if you will then I joked and said I ought not to have said that but something different  she said she should not have liked it if I had   true thought I she loves the attention and attachment of others  however little she herself may return either  but after all the work I have somehow made at parting and I could not help it yet still she thinks me desolate about her than I am my remembrance of her will soon pass over to what is comfortable  I could not have lived happily with her and the being without will soon cease to pother  I have really been very comfortable all this evening - I ha[ve] a ver[y] nice
SH:7/ML/E/15/0059
handso[me] apart[men]t and am ver[y] comf[orta]ble I fear it will be expensive but I must do as well as I can  I only wish to see Lady Gordon and know my fate with her   till then I must be in doubt wr[ote] all the ab[ov]e of today and h[a]d just done it at 10 10/.. - how forlorn and solitary I might feel but thank God I do not   if I had but a little money I should do  I only fear getting rather beyond myself  Mrs. Hawkins is ill - a chill she g[o]t the oth[e]r day - I hope n[o]t any deg[ree] of chol[er]a w[hi]ch is b[a]d en[ou]gh here - L[or]d Durham’s moth[e]r is just dead of it - well! if I h[a]d made my will to my mind, I feel as if I c[oul]d say in calm[ne]ss, God’s will be done! I ha[ve] liv[e]d long en[ou]gh to be content[e]d to be call[e]d hence whenev[e]r it may be the good pleas[u]re of that provid[en]ce w[hi]ch ordereth all th[in]gs wisely - I h[a]d made up my  mind to go out early in the morn[in]g, and do all my jobs - th[e]re is so[me]th[in]g brok[e]n ab[ou]t the rumble of the carr[ia]ge that I can[no]t ha[ve] it tomor[row] I h[a]d best  perh[aps] sit at ho[me] and be busy ab[ou]t my will - How quiet and tranquil I feel! If I live, may it be for good! If I die soon, how m[u]ch mis[er]y I n[o]t escape! a lit[tle] r[ai]n at Tunbridge wells and a lit[tle] en route at 1st and for so[me]ti[me] aft[er]w[ar]ds - qui[te] fair latter[l]y, b[u]t thickish and foggy ov[e]r Lond[on] and too thick for  good view all the way - F[ahrenheit] 61° now at 10 20/.. in my salon - ca[me] to my r[oo]m at 11 1/2 -
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King Falls AM - Episode 5: Night of the Living Dread
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Summary: July 1, 2015 - Sammy & Ben learn of some breaking news regarding the Lake Hatchenhaw John Doe, but not everyone is as pleased as the broadcast duo.
[Podcast intro music]
Announcer Dear listeners, please note that the following program may contain views that do not reflect that of King Falls AM, its management, or its subsidiaries. Listener discretion is advised.
[KFAM intro music]
Sammy You’re listening to King Falls AM, that’s 660 on the radio dial. I’m your host, Sammy Stevens, and as always we are joined by producer and co-host extraordinaire, Ben Arnold.
Ben [trying not to be amused] You’re so- you’re so happy, aren’t you? You’re a child. Getting so giddy over that message.
Sammy Listening to a warning before a radio broadcast I’m on has literally been on the bucket list for a long time. Thanks Merv!
Ben *laughter* Ridiculous. A glutton for punishment.
Sammy What can I say? I enjoy a nice game of hard ball! Uh, y’know, but enough about what Merv doesn’t want you to hear, let’s talk about what he does want you to hear. And what do we have cooking tonight, Ben?
Ben Dude, it’s stacked alright? Stacked. We’ve got the- lovely Miss Emily Potter from the King Falls Library giving us her picks for enlightened summer reading.
Sammy Terrific! We always love speaking with Emily!
Ben You and me both.
Sammy I said “we,” Ben.
Ben Uh, I know. I- *breathes in* [stilted] I- We-We-uh, We’ve got some really cool news! here. We-we are announcing the line-up for the first annual King Falls Ambient Music Festival. That’s coming up the second hour.
Sammy Wait a second. The King Falls Ambient Music Festival? Is this town even big enough for a festival?
Ben Oh yeah! It’s like Coachella[1] but for hipsters that just want to relax. It’s all about “setting the mood.”
Sammy You know, I’m wondering if they’re gonna make it to a second annual.
Ben And then, um, [reluctant and slipping into mumbling] opening up the show we-we’ve got the- doctor *mumbling*
Sammy I-I’m sorry, Ben, what was that? You’re trailing off, buddy.
Ben We have that umm, *sniffs, lets out breath* one… guy. You know that- fo- w- talking about that *deep breath* one thing—
Sammy [trying to cut him off] Ben—
Ben —from a month ago or so—?
Sammy What? What are you talking about?
Ben You know— May- maybe we should start it with Uh, callers first! [mildly frantic] Just-uh-Give us a call at 424-279-3858 and let’s talk about… *tsk* anything! Let’s uh, whats your-whats your-whats-whats on your mind King Falls?
Sammy Ladies and gentlemen, put down your phones for a second. What Ben is trying to say is we’ve got a scoop here this evening on King Falls AM. We’re gonna be speaking with—
Ben [cutting Sammy off]Or you can tweet us! @kingfallsam. I-I-I will literally talk about anything right now. Even to Mr. Derschwitz about that weird toenail thing. Let-lets-lets go, people!
Sammy I thought we agreed—
Ben I know. Sammy, I’m sorry it’s just, [slightly more frantic] I’m-I’m not feelin’ the best here. Alright? my stomach, is all… knotted up, just thinking about this.
Sammy That is journalism. That feeling is journalism—
Ben [speaking over Sammy] I think it might actually be an ulcer! It Tastes, like Fear and Feels, like Cancer . It’s way more than anxiety. I-I’m gonna call Dr. Raúl, at break.
Sammy He’s a chiropractor!
Ben Maybe he can refer me?
Sammy Power through it, buddy! Look at this folks, we got somebody dialing into the hotline right now! You ready for this Ben? Come on.
Ben Please, be Reverend Hawthorne so we can talk about the Revival next month.
Sammy Oh stop it. You know he isn’t even scheduled!
Ben I just thought— maybe that’s how prayers work, I don’t know, I’m not a reverend!
Sammy King Falls AM, you’re on the air.
Dr. Rosenblum [Dr. Rosenblum’s voice is measured and monotonous and mildly creepy at all times] Good evening, this is Dr. Jeffery Rosenblum, with the, King Falls County Coroner’s Office.
Ben C-can I please just say—
Sammy Dr. Rosenblum, it is a pleasure to speak with you this evening.
Rosenblum Excited to be here, Sammy. Ecstatic even. We listen on slow nights.
Ben That’s the scariest thing I’ve ever heard.
Sammy Much appreciated, Doc. Now, as fate would have it, you were the overseeing physician working on the Lake Hatchenhaw John Doe, is that correct?
Ben Doc? Can you just, hold on for- one- moment- please?
Rosenblum Of course, Ben I—
Sammy Don’t start, Ben! We agreed to see this through.
Ben All I’m saying i- lemme finish- a- i-is that maybe it’s not our place *deep breath* to break this kind of news.
Sammy Fine. You know what? You’re right! Let’s just give this to our friends down at Channel 13 and let them be the ones to alert the public about this.
Ben [journalist voice] Doc, Ben Arnold. Tell us about cracking open the mystery body.
Sammy [quietly] Oh.
Rosenblum It’s true that I was the operating physician on that particular John Doe, y-es, irrefutablyy
Sammy Now, as I understand, your official report was released yesterday morning, doctor, but amazingly enough, not one publication or news station in our town- including King Falls AM- reported on it.
Rosenblum You are correct. Busy news day- one would assume.
Ben So, that means, you are— free to talk about it on air.
Rosenblum I would be elated
Sammy First and foremost on everyone’s minds: were there any signs of, uh, y’know, the lake mo- *sighs* I can’t.
Ben Did Kingsie make the body, bite the big one?
Rosenblum There was no evidence that a creature large or small had anything to do with the deceased.
Ben *sigh of relief* That- I knew Kingsie didn’t have it in her.
Sammy Now, Dr. Rosenblum, can you tell us if there was any foul play involved at all?
Rosenblum During our first autopsy we were not able to distinguish with certainty the cause of death. But there were no signs of foul play
Sammy I’m sorry, did you say “first” autopsy?
Ben [confused] Is that normal? Did you- find out the cause of death during the… second autopsy?
Rosenblum Indeed. It was six individual gunshot wounds to the victim’s head. Three shots to the temporal lobe, two to the mendulla oblongata—
Sammy What?! Six gunshot wounds?!
Rosenblum To the cranium, yes. One to the frontal lobe, another to—
Ben So the Lake Hatchenhaw John Doe was, murdered?
Sammy I can’t believe this! This is big! Why didn’t one news outlet report this thing yesterday?!
Rosenblum Well, the cause of death was inconclusive and with no signs of foul play, it was not exactly a juicy story.
Ben and Sammy Wait a second.
Rosenblum …yes?
Sammy I’m sorry, doc. I’m not in the medical orrr criminal fields but, how is six gunshots not foul play?
Rosenblum Well, that was between the first autopsy and the second. The gunshots were self-defense administered via Deputy Kreighauser at my behest.
Sammy Ben, we’re gonna wanna get Troy on the phone and see what he’s got to say about this.
Ben “Things Ben Arnold would never think under ordinary circumstances for 800, Alex.”[2]
Sammy Doc, while we’re getting Deputy Troy on the line, would you mind if we took a quick break to hear from one of our sponsors?
Rosenblum That’s just- Dandy.
[light bg music]
Greg Frickard After a long day’s work or a tough day’s play, you probably just wanna come home and relax. No need to slave over a hot stove for hours on end. Well that’s where we come in! Here at Granny Frickard’s, we know that the less time you spend doing the things you don’t like, is the more time you spend with the ones you love. So come get some of the best frog legs that money can buy. Granny Frickard’s French-fried farm-fresh never-frozen filleted-and-fricasseed fried-and-flambeed frog legs. Mm-mm-mm. So get on down to Granny Frickard’s Froggery at the corner of Main Street and 7th Avenue. We’ll put some pep in your step and some hop in your heart.
[KFAM intro music]
Sammy And we’re back on King Falls AM, here with King Falls County Coroner, Dr. Jeffery Rosenblum.
Rosenblum A Pleasure.
Sammy Do you have Troy, Ben?
Ben He’s booking one of the Williams boys for mooning. He’ll call us in a few.
Sammy I’m a little out of sorts here, doc. Can you explain what happened between the first inconclusive autopsy and the point where Troy filled the cadaver full of lead.
Rosenblum Of course. As I was finishing the initial post-mortem, it came to my attention that the deceased began to emit a hissing sound, fluctuating between the lower thorax and the larynx.
Ben Oh my God.
Rosenblum I called for Deputy Kreighauser and he entered, as I wanted someone else to see this- phenomenon. That’s when the John Doe began a slight, thrashing about the upper torso.
Ben Um… are you saying—
Rosenblum The deputy began to fumble for his sidearm while we both discerned that something was wildly- amiss. The deceased opened its eyes and instantly grabbed for the lapel of my lab coat with voracious tenacity.
Ben Wh- ah- go on.
Rosenblum It gnashed its teeth as I emitted a terrified, albeit, high pitched, scream. And that’s when Troy unholstered his sidearm and administered six lethal shots to the reanimated corpse’s cranium.
Ben A zombie.
Sammy Alright, is there- [fumbling] Let’s just say- is there-
Ben We’ve got Troy on the line.
Deputy Troy [in bg] I don’t care if he was only joshin’. You can’t show your G-D derriere out in public! [car door slams] [pleasantly] Hey boys, what’s goin’ on tonight?
Sammy You tell us, Troy, holy geez! Uh, we’ve got Dr. Rosenblum on the line here and—
Deputy Troy Is this about the zombie?
Ben Yes! So-so you’re confirming this story, Troy?
Deputy Troy Well, hell yeah I’m confirming! I had to do three hours of damn paper work from unloadin’ my pistola into a corpse! Sheriff Gunderson was not the happiest of campers.
Ben [excited and awed] This is amazing… This is unprecedented .
Sammy [skeptical] This is a little unbelievable, Troy.
Rosenblum It is a first in my profession. Believe you me. [still tonelessly] Wowzers.
Deputy Troy Honest engine[3] boys. I capped the all get out of that thing! It had the doc by the face ‘bout to start chewing!
Rosenblum You’re my hero, Deputy Troy.
Deputy Troy Shucks, wasn’t nothin’ special.
Ben [slightly sullen] Except killing the first instance of a zombie in King Falls since—
Sammy Don’t say “since”.
Ben … Well… Since that one time at the mall in the '80s.
Sammy No, that’s not a real thing, Ben. That’s a film.
Ben [worked up] Sammy? How many extraordinary things are gonna have to SLAP you right in the face to make you buy into this? KING FALLS, MAN.
Deputy Troy You know me, Sammy. I always shoot ya straight. But it was the craziest sh[bleep]t I’ve ever seen. I mean it was like my-ex-wife-needs-alimony-money crazy.
Ben See? Even Barney Fife[4] saw it.
Sammy *sighs* I just—
Rosenblum I don’t want to cause an uproar here, but since that exam, there have been, other cases.
Ben Of frickin’ zombies?
Rosenblum Of reanimation among corpses… yes.
Deputy Troy Doc, you just give me a call if you need. I’m more than happy to go Clint Eastwood if the situation arises.
Rosenblum Will do, Deputy. Thank you so much for your- assistance. Without you, there may not have been this- interview.
Deputy Troy [proud] To protect and serve.
Sammy I can’t take all this in right now, Dr. Rosenblum I- e- Thank you so much for your insightful information.
Rosenblum As they say, [still monotone] “you got it, duude.”
[click, dial tone]
Ben You okay, Sammy? You… don’t look so well.
Deputy Troy Ah, hell, boys.[siren whoop] I gotta go. I’ll call you back later tonight! One of the Williams boys is tryin’ ta saw through the bars outside the jailhouse? [sirens in bg] [through megaphone] Jacob Williams put your hands UP and the file DOWN.
[click, dial tone]
Ben Alright King Falls, you’ve heard our story, let’s hear yours. Have you or anyone you know experienced anything like what the doctor spoke of? Reanimation? The walking—
Sammy Don’t.
Ben You know what I mean. Give us a call or tweet us.
Sammy Looks like the board is lighting up!
Ben Um…
Sammy What’s up? Okay, it can’t be any crazier than what we just heard, Ben.
Ben Line One, Sammy.
Sammy Welcome to King Falls AM, you’re on with Sammy and Ben.
Line 1 [female, almost sounds automated] Good evening, Sammy—
Sammy Do I know you ma'am?
Riley — please hold for Mayor Grisham.
Ben He… Probably just wants us to— mark these tapes as, evidence. *nervous laugh* Right, Sammy?
Sammy Or burn them.
Riley Sammy Stevens, Mayor Grisham.
Sammy Mayor?
Mayor Grisham Sammy… Ben.
Sammy You’re on live on King Falls AM, sir.
Mayor Grisham [commanding] Take me off and go to break. We need to chat.
Sammy No can do. Ben says we aren’t scheduled for break for another- uh- at least ten minutes.
Mayor Grisham Ben. Cut. To. Commercial.
Ben Uh- uh- uh- the thing is- I- I- I can’t- do that. Sir.
Mayor Grisham [threateningly pleasant] You boys want to talk live on air? We can talk live on air.
Sammy [challenging] Nothin’ to hide on this end of the phone, Mayor Grisham.
Mayor Grisham I hear your snide remarks, Sammy. I’ve read the transcripts.
Sammy Which! let’s be honest, is pretty weird. We’re a late night AM talk show, why are you bothering with us?
Mayor Grisham Oh, I don’t bother with you. I try to keep up to date with all the local news and entertainment. I gotta say, I was really happy a big city radio guy decided to come play host at our little radio station.
Sammy Well, I’m more than happy to—
Mayor Grisham I wasn’t finished… But I have to say, I’m a little less than thrilled with [accusingly] all the excitement you brought with you.
Sammy I’d hardly call reporting the news “excitement”, sir—
Mayor Grisham It’s interesting to me that I don’t see Channel 13 breaking these crazy stories.
Ben [quickly] No offense, your honor, but those idiots don’t know their a[bleep]holes from their elbows.
Mayor Grisham And you boys being on site when these “events” happen? [softly, still accusing] It’s a little bit of a coincidence don’t you think?
Sammy Are you insinuating that we are staging these events, Mayor?
Mayor Grisham I’m stating facts. I’m sure your ratings are way, way up there since all these sensational events seem to coincide with your broadcast. Why do you think that is? Furthermore, I mean who’s up listening to you at this ungodly hour of the night?!
Sammy Seemingly most of the town, Sir. As well as whomever you’ve hired to keep an ear on us.
Mayor Grisham I’ve tried to be nice about this… And I tried to be civil… but I think it’s about time that you troublemakers changed formats. No more of this funny business. It’s not good for the listeners. It’s not good for the residents. And honestly? it’s not good for me. I don’t appreciated being painted in this light, gentlemen.
Sammy Oh! You mean the light where you as a public service,[sic] try to quell the voice of the people.
Ben It’s not your right to tell us what we can and can’t report on, sir. All due respect.
Mayor Grisham [rudely] All due respect, Ben Arnold. Just a couple of months ago you were digging up old records on eBay for Chet Sebastian to run on about. Now you’re a media star?? That’s worrisome! Seems you fellas have All the reasons in the world to fabricate these issues, and I have to say I’m not gonna sit here and listen to this, while you LIE TO THE GOOD PEOPLE OF KING FALLS.
Sammy Well, when we start “fabricating” and “making things up,” you can come throw the book at us. But until then- [click, dial tone] Whoops! Looks like you just got disconnected. I’d wait for you to give us a call back and all, but with it not being an election year I probably shouldn’t hold my breath.
Ben Line One iiis lit up again, Sammy.
Sammy [insincerely] Oh, sorry about that Mayor! I must have fabricated accidentally dumping your call when-
Esther Rollens [heavy metal music in bg] [voice old and wavering] Did you boys fund a lavender ball of yarn in there? Been looking for it all week! [click, dial tone]
Ben [shaken] Sammy, I think that commercial might do us some good right now.
[KFAM outro]
[CREDITS]
References
[1] Coachella - The Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival (commonly called Coachella or the Coachella Festival) is an annual music and arts festival held at the Empire Polo Club in Indio, California, in the Coachella Valley in the Colorado Desert.
[2] Reference to the TV game show Jeopardy!
[3] I honestly can’t tell if he’s saying “honest engine” or “honest injun” but i’mma go with the one that’s technically incorrect but also not super racist.
[4] Barney Fife - Deputy from the Andy Griffith Show. Calling a police officer or authority figure "Barney Fife" has become an American slang term for gross ineptitude or overzealousness.
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woollyslisterblog · 5 years
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1834 April Tuesday 22nd (part one)
Tuesday 22
6.30
11.45
Not even play last night on account of her cousin asleep directly ver[y] fine morn[in]g F48° at 6.45 – I out at 7.45 till br[eak]f[a]st at 8.30 – out ag[ai]n at 9.15 Miss W-[Walker] w[i]th me w[i]th the workmen then – w[e]nt to the bot[tom] of walk and b[a]ck to see the plant[in]g (mov[e]d to the spot yest[erday] aft[ernoo]n) of the piece of box hedge w[i]th 2 hollies in it that w[oul]d at the edge of the grass in front of the draw[in]g r[oo]m wind[o]w – At Cliff Hill at 11.30 for 35 min[ute]s – 1/2 h[ou]r at Lidg[a]te b[a]ck at 1.30 – f[oun]d Miss Mary Briggs here – Miss W-[Walker] a li[tle] tir[e]d and lay d[o]wn – I b[a]ckw[ar]ds and forw[ar]ds w[i]th h[e]r and out – the hedgehog holly that w[a]s just bel[ow] the ab[ov]e nam[e]d box and 2 holl[ie]s mov[e]d to n[ea]r the Draw well as als[o] the oth[e]r bit of the old box holl[ies] that w[a]s n[ea]r the brewh[ou]se corner – and the small[e]r of the 2 large holl[ie]s that stood at the end of the terr[a]ce n[ea]r[e]st the wall n[o]t satisfi[e]d w[i]th the pl[a]ce int[o] w[hi]ch I h[a]d mov[e]d it bef[ore] just bel[ow] its orig[inal] place – all put n[ea]r the draw well clump-wise – in the course of the aft[ernoo]n n[ea]r p. 2 and 1/2 p. 3 and finish[e]d my let[ter] to M-[Mariana] beg[an] on Sat[urday] told Miss W-[Walker] she might read it she did and approved exceedingly “Shibden Hall Sat[urday] eve[nin]g – 9 April 1834 Your few hur[ried] lines, my d[ea]r[e]st Mary of the 15th, w[hi]ch I rec[eive]d on Thur[sday] ev[enin]g M[o]st sinc[erel]y ha[ve] been writ[ten] at the mom[ent] of your rec[eivin]g my last let[ter] – I need n[o]t say how m[uch I ha[ve] th[oug]ht of you, you are qui[te] aware, that my own happ[ine]ss m[u]st be imperf[ec]t till I am bet[ter] assur[e]d of y[ou]rs – b[u]t I still hope, and still pers[au]de mys[elf], that you will, by and by, see th[in]gs thro[ugh] a bright[e]r medium, and that you will live to acknowl[edge], I ha[ve] been a juster stew[ar]d than you th[in]k, both for your comf[or]t and my own – I am qui[te] sure you ha[ve] no reas[o]n to disappr[ove] wh[a]t I ha[ve] done – it is wh[a]t you ha[ve] repeat[edl]y advis[e]d and wh[at] you m[u]st ha[ve] seen that I determ[ine]d to do, fr[om] the mom[en]t ypu h[a]d tak[e] the only poss[ible] means of convinci[in]g me, that this adv[i]ce w[a]s sincere – God gr[an]t, my d[ea]r[e]st Mary, that we ha[ve] b[o]th been right!
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choisgirls · 7 years
Note
Ahhh! I hope you're still doing the Halloween asks bc?? Halloween?? Is my second most fav holiday?? (Dia de los muertos being first 💀😆) Anyways, rfa(v already counts as rfa right?)+ vanderwood and saeran: what kind of family themed costumes would they wear with their fam?
Ooooo! Dia de los muertos is also a good holiday!!! ^^ this onecan be answered simply so here it is, i hope its okay! ~4
YOOSUNG:
either animal themedcostumes or game themed costumes!
Like you’re either theAristocats or you’re Mario and the gang, no in between
He likes to make yourown costumes! That way its full of love and he wants his children to know daddycARES
not competitive????but yes competitive. He makes the costumes as best as he can and he comparesthem to other families and even store bought ones
cries when hischildren are dressed up because theyre so adorable and he loves them so much
ZEN:
Superherocostumes!!!!!!
Why, you ask? Thecostume shows off his body and it makes him happy
not to mention hethinks his children are the heroes of his life??? Theyre precious and amazingand bring happiness and he just loves them
he’ll even go as the/villain/ while the kids are the superheroes if they want him to
not to mention he canput his acting to good work while he pretends to be beaten up. What cuties heck
JAEHEE:
homemade costumes forthe win
you cant tell me shewouldnt try to get you and the babies to dress up as different sized coffees
THE BABY IS A COFFEEBEAN GOD BLESS HHHHNNNN PRECIOUS
Either decked outcostumes that even /smell/ like coffee, or simple coffee-coloured clothing with a simple label
Taking tons ofpictures of the children and crying, theyre so beautiful, she cant
JUMIN:
Push him out of hiscomfort zone, do it MC
ROCK BAND MEMBERS.
THROW HIS ASS INLEATHER PANTS i would fucking d ie pl eas e
The kids love the hellout of it. They run around singing songs, playing their little guitars, evenhave a little boom box to play music as they rock out
he’s constantly facepalming but he truly loves how adorable the rest of his family is. Everyone’ssinging, playing, and having so much fun. He could deal with the leather pantsif he could see the loves of his life being this happy
SAEYOUNG:
PETER PAN, WENDY, ANDTHE LOST BOYS
He is peter pan. Hewill fist fight his child to be peter pan, which makes you wendy. regardless ofgender. you’re a girl? wendy. youre a boy? wendy. youre gender neutral? wendy.
You cant get him outof the tights for weeks after halloween someone please help this family
but hes so cute? Sucha kid? He’s playing with the kids all the time, climbing up on light poles andjumping out of bushes
he even has the redhair, mc, are you positive he isnt /the real/ peter pan??
 JIHYUN:
So extra but /so/cute. Put that creativity to work, Jihyun. Are you ready?
HOME MADE. LARGE.FULLY FUNCTIONING. ROBOT COSTUMES. He has saeyoung help dont let him fool you
Custom costumes foreach person of his family, even down to their favourite colour
Everyone walks like arobot the whole night, they even talk like theyre robots
Honestly cries whenthe kids tell him they wanna wear the costumes all the time?? His work? All thetime?
SAERAN:
DISNEY VILLIANS DO NOTFIGHT ME
Okay listen, thekid(s) wanted to do Disney and he Did Not™
but fortunately?? Thekids also liked the villains in the movies
did he enjoy beingdressed up as the villain? not necessarily, but it warmed his heart knowingthat his child(ren) can love and accept someone with a dark past (pls let melove my husband)
and cutie helps /make/the costumes. Hardcore. Making the costumes. Every lil detail. To make hisfamily happy. Fight me.
 VANDERWOOD:
Cops! And! Criminals!
Because??? The children think its fun?
“Look!” says the youngest, “I have my owntaser!” its vandys. it is the precious taser. cue vandy freaking out
The kids make Vanderwood so proud though because they chaseafter Saeyoung with their batons
Though they’re constantly running from them? Throughout thewhole night? Let Vandy Rest™ please
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whatdoesshedotothem · 3 years
Text
Tuesday 27 March 1832: SH:7/ML/E/15/0045
8 ¾
12 ¼
- Let[ter] fr[om] L[ad]y Gordon (Garnestone Hereford 24th  inst[ant]) - 3 p[ages] - fine morn[in]g F[ahrenheit] 62° at 10 in my r[oo]m and 60° at 10 20/: in the blac[on]y - L[ad]y G- [Gordon] h[a]s settl[e]d h[e]r Spanish affairs b[u]t yet hopes to see Sp[ai]n ag[ai]n one of these days - Cosmo to ha[ve] a 5th. share as partner and she tho’ having nothing to receive for eight years has nothing to pay - L[ad]y G- [Gordon] wr[ite]s in good sp[iri]ts - chol[er]a is in Paris, b[u]t this will n[o]t prev[en]t her go[in]g there - we are to settle our plans ‘seat[e]d und[e]r the large tree on the top of the hill in the jardin des Plantes’ ‘and God willing we will see some curious scenes together before we die’ - all in the mind to agree and half sorry at being at all hampered with Miss H- [Hobart]  br[eak]f[a]st at 10 20/: Mr. Wooll ca[me] to measure my b[oo]ks for a box to pack them in and L[ad]y Anne Scott call[e]d ab[ou]t 12 1/2 for ab[ou]t 20 min[ute]s - till then Miss [Hobart] and I had got into talking she not liking my so thorough change reminded her of what she had said last Sunday week   I could understand her marrying but in no other case could I relish her fancy fancying anyone more than myself if there was any change of our ever living together   it seems she has ssome thought she may marry we got on very well till I made some unlucky remark on this subject and she was in tears and I sorry till we w[e]nt out a lit[tle] bef[ore] 1 for an h[ou]r - (Miss H- [Hobart] and I) w[e]nt to Woolls, saunt[ere]d a lit[tle] in the Lond[on] r[oa]d and in front of the Croft and there she took courage to be conciliatory to say she liked me very much and in substance that if she did
SH:7/ML/E/15/0046
not always ssay what I liked  she was afraid to say too soon what might be repented of  afterwards   perhaps that was unkind   no not at all said I understand you your reason is i[n]telligible and I am satisfied  she was pleased to see me take it so well and suffice it to say we became good friends and afterwards went on comfortably and I said I should write differently to Lady G- [Gordon]  from what I had intended and merely say we would settle all in  London I see Miss H- [Hobart] thinks me too old for her I said ten years   but the fact is she likes me or at least does not like the idea of my too easily slipping thro’ her fingers   I become calmer and calmer  resolved and more and more able to look to my own interest   providence orders all things wisely  I will wait patiently the event doing the best I can for myself   but let me keep my heart  aloof and give it less hastily in time to come   I will be rather more liant to Miss H- [Hobart] but after all she has cured me more than perhaps she wished or intended -
asleep in my r[oo]m fr[om] 3 to 4 -
then in 35 min[ute]s wr[ote] the ab[ov]e of today - at 4 20/: turn[e]d to my let[ter] to M- [Mariana] 2 p[ages] writ[ten] on Sun[day] and
near[l]y 1 writ[ten] yest[erday] morn[in]g - do n[o]t like h[e]r to th[in]k my health so m[u]ch the worse for
Hast[in]gs - ‘you are right - I sh[oul] be bet[ter] for 2 or 3 w[ee]ks w[i]th you at Lawt[o]n; b[u]t I can[no]t manage
it now - the bug-bus[ine]ss does really stick terrib[l]y in my throat, in spi[te] of all y[ou]r good reason[in]g
ab[ou]t it - yet ev[e]n if I c[oul]d get it digest[e]d so soon (and y[ou]r infl[uen]ce w[oul]d be all pow[er]ful) still that
w[oul]d n[o]t get rid of the oth[e]r diffic[ultie]s, Shibd[e]n and the carr[ia]ge duty concern - I shall be ver[y] ver[y] sor[ry]
if I do n[o]t see you; b[u]t, at this mom[en]t, I see lit[tle] chance of our manag[in]g an[y]th[in]g like a comf[orta]ble
meet[in]g - the obstac[le]s are fearfully strong on y[ou]r side, and mine too’ - can[no]t get off fr[om] here till the
23[r]d Ap[ril] and shall be oblig[e]d to go to Lond[on] aft[e]r all; for tho’ L[ad]y G- [Gordon] and I ha[ve] been ‘writ[in]g ab[ou]t our
plans; b[u]t it will be decid[edl]y  best to talk them ov[e]r’   I m[u]st be in Lond[on] on the 25th next m[on]th and embark on the 29th
wheth[e]r L[ad]y G- [Gordon] can be ready or n[o]t - determ[ine]d n[o]t to lose the duty
on my carr[ia]ge aft[e]r all the poth[e]r ab[ou]t it - ‘yet the n[o]t see[in]g you will be a gr[ea]t disapp[ointmen]t, a
real afflict[io]n; and the near[e]r the ti[me] co[me]s, the mo[re] I shall feel it, and be irresolute’ - b[u]t hope to
see h[e]r on the oth[e]r side the wat[e]r    ‘It ab[ou]t six m[on]ths s[in]ce I saw you - So[me]how or oth[e]r, I can[no]t
fancy I shall be ver[y] m[u]ch long[e]r bef[ore] I see you ag[ai]n - Mary! I am poth[ere]d ab[ou]t ho[me] concerns, and
can neith[e]r do wh[a]t I wish, or wh[a]t I ought - B[u]t, in the midst of all, the conclud[in]g part of
y[ou]r let[ter] ma[ke]s me laugh - Miss H- [Hobart] ta[ke] up her abode w[i]th me! n[o]t that I kno[w] of or expect -
Do you n[o]t rememb[e]r wh[a]t I ha[ve] alw[a]ys told you? - H[e]r health once reestab[lishe]d, and I count
up[on] her companion[in]g hers[elf] ver[y] diff[erentl]y’ - L[ad]y S- [Stuart] h[a]s been ill - b[u]t is recov[ere]d - is 8 or 9
y[ea]rs young[e]r than my fath[e]r and may ha[ve] sev[era]l comf[orta]ble y[ea]rs to co[me] - can[no]t settle an[y]th[in]g w[i]th
L[ad]y G- [Gordon] in Lond[on] - all this talk[e]d ov[e]r w[i]th M- [Mariana] when I saw h[e]r last, that she kno[w]s up to this
ti[me] as m[u]ch as I do - ‘I cert[ainl]y do wish so[me]th[in]g w[a]s settl[e]d - b[u]t being impat[ien]t does no good; and I
ta[ke] th[in]gs as they co[me], ver[y] quiet[l]y - I th[in]k of noth[in]g as fix[e]d, b[u]t my go[in]g to Paris in the 1
st
inst[an]ce’ - 10 days
quarantine, b[u]t comf[orta]ble temp[orar]y hot[e]ls to perform it in - finish[e]d my let[ter] last 1/3 of p[age] 3.
and long ends and und[e]r the seal sm[all] and close - tell her to ta[ke] care of hers[elf] and wr[ite] me cheer[in]g let[ter]s
I can[no]t bear to th[in]k of n[o]t seeing you ag[ai]n bef[ore] I go - and yet wh[a]t can I do? all my consolat[io]n is, that
all h[a]s been talk[e]d ov[e]r - noth[in]g left unsaid - and if there be an[y]th[in]g new that c[oul]d be add[e]d, perh[aps] it is
that I hope I shall nev[e]r repent the decis[io]n that my a[un]t hers[elf] made, and the break[in]g up our estab[lishemen]t in
Paris - B[u]t this is qui[te] bet[ween] ours[elves]’ ment[ione]d McD-‘s [Macdonald] go[in]g to leave my a[un]t on acc[oun]t of her (McD-‘s [Macdoland])
health - and that they ha[ve] h[a]d the cholera in Paris these 2 m[on]ths - at 5 50/: s[e]nt off my let[ter] to Mrs. Lawt[o]n
Lawt[o]n hall Lawt[o]n Cheshire - wr[ote] 1 p[age] to my a[un]t - dress[e]d - din[ner] at 6 3/4 in 40 min[ute]s - coff[ee] at
8 - won 1 and lost 1 hit at b[a]ckgam[mo]n - fr[om] 9 3/4 in an h[ou]r r[ea]d al[ou]d fr[om] p[age] 101 to 140 ch[apter] 59 vol[ume] xi. Gibb[o]n
ca[me] upst[ai]rs at 11 10/: and to my r[oo]m at 11 1/4 -
very good friends   she asked me to give her a half hoop ruby ring perhaps we shall now go on very well   I have no inclination to teaze her with caresses and ‘tis well -
fine mild day
b[u]t ver[y] lit[tle] sun aft[e]r 11 or 12 in the morn[in]g F[ahrenheit] 63° in my r[oo]m at 11 3/4 p.m. and 41° at 12 in
the balc[on]y - L[ad]y Anne Scott s[e]nt us this ev[enin]g to look Withering’s bot[an]y by MacGillivray 1 vol[ume] [octa]vo cloth
pl[a]tes 10/. - seems useful, and easy, and element[ar]y, and suffic[ientl]y portable
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