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natasha-in-space · 2 years

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Heavily inspired by @marshmallowprotection's pocket Saeran au! While originally I planned to leave it on this, I just couldn't help myself, so here's a fic featuring my cmc Natasha below. This turned out way longer than I originally intended for it to be, but I quite like the final result nonetheless. Oh, and btw: Natasha plays the role of Ray's/Saeran's assistant rather the being a tester for the RFA app!

"No, that's not the right code! What did I tell you!? This is your third attempt, and you STILL can't grasp the solution to this one simple problem that I've already laid out clearly for you!? What, apparently you can't even type correctly!?"

With a heavy sigh, Natasha buried her head into her elbows, tightly squeezing her eyes shut in a feeble attempt to block out yet another fit of yelling assaulting her ears. Her head was slowly starting to pound from the sheer amount of information she was desperately trying to process in the shortest amount of time possible, while her eyes were already drying up from hours of meticulous grueling work in front of multiple bright monitors. Her entire body seemed to be begging her for rest, or at the very least, even a minute to stretch her stiff limbs and distract herself with literally anything else other than countless of symbols on the annoyingly bright computer screen in front of her.

Ever since Saeran had shrunk to the size of a newborn kitten in one day - to the sheer shock of them both - she had tried her very best to carry out their shared responsibilities on her own shoulders, under the strict guidance of her boss. However... she's not sure how long she can hold out like this.

Natasha's assignments as an assistant hardly included work on Magenta's code or general software, not after Ray concluded that it was much more productive for them both to delegate and leave all the paperwork to her, along with various applicable tasks that he had to occasionally focus on, instead of his main tasks. Thus, they both worked in areas which they were most efficient in, while at the same time easing each other's workload. And even with Saeran's strict instructions right at her ear, her energy and concentration could only take her so far. It took her only a couple hours of uninterrupted work until her fingers began to ache and she unconsciously started to miss out on even the most obvious of mistakes in dozens of words on multiple screens.

However... It's not like she could blame Saeran right now. She couldn't even imagine what it was like for him in this situation.

Moreover, she could feel that all these screams and insults he continuously threw at her were simply a manifestation of his fears and paranoia, which were quite difficult for him to cope with at the moment. The Savior cannot know about this. And his whole life, at this very moment, was in her hands. Literally. He easily fits in the palm of her hand - harming him would be so easy, even by mere accident. The only thing left for him to do was shout, yell and appear as intimidating as his size could allow him to be.

No wonder he's been so on edge lately.

So... Natasha tried not to dwell too much on his venomous words that were slipping off the tip of his tongue one after another in a fit of utter frustration and helplessness. He was simply expressing his feelings as best he could, given his heavily limited resources.

She was pulled out of her musings about their troubling situation by a slight jerk to the side, accompanied by a small pain shooting in her temple. Twitching in her seat, the girl tried to carefully return to a proper sitting position, while doing her best as to not accidentally push Saeran onto the floor when lifting her head.

He pulled at her hair - Natasha quite quickly figured out what was the matter. She had to maneuver awkwardly in her seat, holding out her palm to him for safety, until he successfully settled onto her shoulder where he could interact with her most closely. Her hair might be quite long, but she certainly didn't want to test whether or not he could hold onto the thick strands with enough strength as to not fall off.

It's rather intriguing how quickly they developed a system of sorts out of non-verbal interactions with each other, given the drastic change in communication between them.

Turning her head to the tiny hacker on her shoulder, she was met with a pair of irritated mint eyes.

...oh yeah, he's definitely not in the mood.

Saeran clenched his teeth, trying to sound as menacing as possible, given his unique eccentric circumstances.

"And how long are you planning to lie around doing nothing, huh? Should I remind you for the hundredth time of the importance of what you do here? Or is your brain so impossibly small that the concept of 'duty' is too complicated for you?" He spat out with clear venom in his rough voice.

She couldn't help the raw feeling of disappointment blooming deep within her chest, listening to these harsh words. Her boss regressed to the same old cruel insults and humiliation that Natasha now had to deal with on a daily basis yet again. Not that he was a tender angel to her before this, but now it felt like he was on a crisp of exploding at her at every single insignificant mistake she made.

It was suffocating and draining.

Saeran was scared and tired, she understood that.

But this applies to her in equal part as well. She simply wanted him to understand this fundamental fact and quit trying his very best to see her as a villain that was ready to pounce onto him at any moment of vulnerability on his part. They're in this mess together... just because his position is more vulnerable doesn't mean that she immediately becomes the one with all the control at her fingertips. However... she had no desire to argue with him or respond with anger to anger. That wouldn't solve anything.

So, with yet another tired sigh falling from her lips, Natasha raised her palm to the miniature man on her shoulder, offering her hand as a platform of sorts for easy movement. She avoided his piercing gaze, chewing on her bottom lip. Her voice came out in an unsure half-whisper, with her testing the waters and hoping that she'll successfully calm him down, at least a little bit.

"Saeran... We need a break. I won't be able to do a good job when I'm this easily distracted, and I think you understand that very well. It would be much better to give both of us some time to recuperate, so that we can get back to work with renewed vigor and achieve much better results at the end of the day. You know, rather trying to finish something when we're both on edge like this?"

Despite a clear audible sneer of annoyance on his side, he obeyed, jumping down into her palm and allowing her to gingerly wrap her thumb around his tiny torso as a safety net. He folded his arms across his chest, clearly not feeling pleased with her offer.

"...At this rate, the Savior will become suspicious in a matter of days, stupid toy."

Natasha hummed under her breath as she gently lowered her boss onto the smooth surface of their shared desk, where they could look at each other face to face. She folded both of her arms on the table, resting her chin on her hands and thus lowering herself down to his level, where he could reach out and touch the tip of her nose with his hand.

"I know..."

She sounded hoarse and completely worn out - a perfect representation of her exhausted state of mind after days of grueling work. She reached forward, her fingertip briefly touching the tangled mop of his white hair, before he had time to quickly step back and push her finger away with an angry scowl on his face. Just like she expected him to do. At this size, he even looked... kind of cute like that.

Natasha hid the lower half of her face in her arms, thus concealing a small cheerful smile that helplessly tugged at the corners of her lips, despite her best efforts to hold it back. She didn't want him to think she was laughing at him, after all.

"We'll figure something out."

The words sounded somewhat naive and even stupid, she got that. A childish belief that everything will inevitably work out, and they will be able to find a path to their happiness while also avoiding any harm on the way.

As if confirming her internal concussions, Saeran grimaced in clear revulsion, clenching his hands at his sides into small fists.

"You know how much I hate empty promises like that."

Natasha could not ignore a brief glimpse of hurt in his clouded mint eyes, as if her words made him think of something extremely unpleasant to him. A short reminder of a distant past that was still a mysterious and complex puzzle for her. A puzzle that she'll have to solve sometime in the future. At least, he noticeably calmed down, although he is very unlikely to admit it out loud to her face like that. One way or another, now he was talking to her in a relatively calm tone. He stopped trying to desperately ground himself through endless screams and threats, which were only making him feel more stressed out at the end of the day.

She lifted her head off her elbows once again, facing him fully now. She tentatively searched his gaze with her own, feeling an odd need to reassure him any way she could. This odd sense of determination gave her enough courage to speak out yet again, more firmly this time.

"Saeran, no matter what happens... I won't let anything or anyone hurt you. You don't have to believe me right now, I know that these are just words, nothing more. But even if the Savior finds out... I will do my best to keep you safe."

She gave him a small reassuring smile, though her green eyes seemed much more sorrowful and fatigued when compared to her seemingly warm and kind facial expression.

"After all, you're doing your best for Magenta even now, I don't see any reason for her to be angry with you. I consider your diligence and perseverance to be worthy of respect, not disappointment."

Natasha unconsciously bounced her leg up and down with a quick anxious rhythm, carefully picking out her next words as to not annoy him too much with her silly attempt at consoling. She stuttered.

"...B-but hey, I am quite confident that we can find a way out of this ordeal without any worst-case scenario occurring!"

She swiftly realized that she started babbling away once again, her face flushing with an embarrassed blush at her own unnecessarily long speech. Oh yes, she and Ray could share long conversations about anything and nothing for hours on end, not stopping for a single minute, until their voices felt horse from talking for so long. They both tended to get lost in their thoughts and daydreams, oftentimes even forgetting about the world surrounding them in the process.

On the other hand, Saeran was inclined to express his inner feelings through actions rather than words. Which made this slight difference between them somewhat embarrassing at times.

Saeran's gaze was fixed to the side, and his eyebrows were deeply furrowed, casting a dark shadow on his incredibly pale features. It seems that her words had caused him to rethink some of his own deductions, prompting him to carefully consider his course of action for a proper response to her statements.

Although, Natasha did not at all expect loud gratitude, or joy for her meek support. More so, the girl did not want anything from him at all. All she wished for was to provide him at least a small bit of comfort amidst the raging storm of seemingly endless obstacles and problems of all kinds that had surrounded him in these past couple of days.

So, she waited patiently, not interfering in any way and not invading his small bubble of personal space.

He was just as worn out as her. While maybe he was no longer torturing himself with long hours of grueling work at his desk, this did not at all mean that all these new changes, to which he had to adapt whether he wanted to or not, did not fall on his shoulders as a heavy burden. Not to mention the fears about what awaits him in the future that constantly haunted him. None of them knew how the Savior would react to such a bizarre change, and they did not really want to find out. Nobody needed to voice these concerns out loud to confirm that. No one knew how long he would have to stay in this form before everything would return to normal.

...would it return to normal?

Another question that even Natasha herself was too scared to say out loud.

She understood his feelings.

Saeran has always been the 'strongest' - the sword and shield that will protect both himself and their eternal paradise until his very last breath like the vicious hurricane destroying everything in it's path without any mercy. The one before whom everyone trembled and bowed their heads both in deep respect and fear. The one who the Saviour trusted with her own safety wholeheartedly. In his current state... how is he supposed to support this fragile role entrusted onto him? It's no wonder he's so short-tempered and restless lately.

And although Natasha certainly would love for her boss to see more in himself than just this one extreme trait, due to which he is eternally obliged to continue to prove his usefulness... Kind words alone can only take you so far. And yet, she tried time and time again.

Finally, Saeran responded, quietly huffing under his breath and averting his gaze.

"I don't need your protection or pity, airhead... Don't talk to me like I'm a helpless weed begging for sun and water to survive."

The phrase came out hardly as sharp and indifferent as he most likely intended for it to be. Natasha could have sworn she heard his voice involuntarily tremble at the last couple of words, causing him to turn his head away from her only further. He refused to raise his eyes up to her face again, only staring bitterly somewhere at his feet. It hurt to see him so dull and fatigued as opposed to his usual fiery self.

The girl cocked her head to the side, slowly and carefully sliding her index finger across the rough surface of the table and stopping inches away from her tiny boss, leaving him room to breathe, and at the same time, wishing to express her compassion one way or another.

Her voice dropped to a hushed whisper that slipped past her lips in a soft melody, loud enough to reach his ears, but too quiet to be audible outside of their shared private space.

"Well... I don't know how you'll feel about it, but to me, you're still one of the strongest people I've ever met, Saeran. Even in front of a situation that's so unbelievably confusing and scary to you, you still do your best. You keep moving forward no matter what. Fitting in the palm of my hand hasn't shrunk my admiration for you at all."

Giving him a faint but sincere smile, Natasha turned her green eyes to the large stack of papers on the side, deciding not to keep her thoughts hidden inside her own head this one time. A quiet hum escaped past her lips.

"But, you know... there's nothing wrong with being afraid either. After all, for me courage doesn't mean the absence of fears or worries, but the decision to move on despite them. Having doubts and fears doesn't make you more or less resilient. More so, when you think about it this way, fear is also a kind of concern for one's well-being. If we were not afraid of heights or darkness, it would be very easy for us to hurt ourselves, don't you agree?"

She crossed her legs on her seat, thoughtfully resting her chin on her free palm.

"Sometimes, there is nothing wrong with listening to your inner troubles, whatever they may be."

A certain melancholy filled her dull gaze as she started gently tapping on the surface of the table with her forefinger: a nervous habit that tended to come out in all its glory whenever she sank too deep into her own mind. She continued, paying no mind to the rhythmic sound of drumming filling the air around them.

"-And weeds need sunlight and fresh water, even when they're in bloom and are reaching for the sunny sky. Just because a flower looks healthy and strong does not mean that it does not need the same love and care as flowers that have wilted for whatever reason. You should provide them with all of your warmth regardless of their states. Sometimes, a flower may look like it's flourishing, but in reality, it needs some sort of care."

Before Natasha could continue her allegory, she was interrupted by the rough annoyed groan of a young hacker nearby.

"-You're starting to sound like that marshmallow boy, stop it. It's grossing me out to hear such lovey-dovey speeches, especially from you."

Saeran folded his arms across his chest, glaring at her with slightly puffed-out cheeks, like a grumpy cat demanding for attention. Once again, she couldn't help but point out just how utterly adorable he looked right now, making her want to try poking his cheek at least once.

...Of course, in the end, she decided not to. Besides, he is unlikely to enjoy being the object of her cooing due to his small size. Instead, Natasha let out a good-natured giggle as she tucked a lock of stray hair behind her ear and returned to the reality in front of her, shifting her gaze back to the white-haired man below.

"Hehehe, yeah, we definitely can't let that happen, can we? But I hope my 'lovey-dovey speech' touched you in one way or another."

A playful wink lightened up her tired features, while she puffed out her chest in false bravado.

"I was completely sincere with you, after all!"

He arched an eyebrow at her. Seems like he didn't appreciate her playfulness that much.

"Are you seriously playing cheeky with me right now, toy?"

Natasha faked deep astonishment, covering her mouth with her palm and letting out a soft gasp of shock.

"Sir, what are you saying? I'm in no position to allow myself to be playing cheeky with you! All my words are the pure and honest truth. That's why I am your assistant, don't you agree with me?"

Saeran rolled his eyes at her, suddenly reaching out and sharply pinching at her fingertip, which still rested defenselessly beside him. Not expecting such a direct move from him at all, the girl squeaked in bewilderment, instinctively pulling her hand back and staring at him with shocked pair of green eyes the size of dinner plates.

Pleased with her stunned reaction, Saeran chuckled with his trademark smirk now playing on his lips. He cocked his head to the side with a sort of defiance in his cool mint eyes.

"What was it you said? I think I didn't hear you clear enough, would you care to repeat that for me? You've become too arrogant for your own good, silly toy. Don't think you can escape your punishment for this just because I'm physically unable to enact it on you just yet. You know very well how sharp my memory is, so don't expect to slip away when everything will go back to normal."

He leaned forward, confidently folding his arms behind his back.

"In addition to that, I'm more than assured that you've already rested quite enough during all this time babbling about nonsense. Your long useless speeches are plenty of proof of that. Now get to work!"

Natasha sighed in defeat, drooping her shoulders and obediently grabbing a stack of papers that demanded her attention at a distance.

"Roger that, boss... But, would it be too arrogant of me to ask for your permission to take care of this part of the job first? My eyes are tired of staring at the monitor all day..."

She put on her most pitiful expression, hoping to take advantage of his good mood while she still had this rare chance.

With a little bit of effort, Saeran climbed onto the stack of papers, staring at her with a defiant spark glittering with renewed fire in his previously dim eyes. This sight involuntarily made her smile with joy, despite the very possible refusal of her bold request. Natasha definitely much more preferred seeing him like this, rather than when he was so blinded by his inner demons that anger and fear consumed all of his thoughts, forcing him to wear himself out to the very limit.

And it was quite funny how domineering his posture looked with such small stature, she couldn't lie.

"I still can't believe Ray chose such a useless assistant for himself, but... that's the way it is. However, if I don't see this stack of papers finished in an hour, you'll regret it, got that!?"

Her grin only grew in size as she nodded enthusiastically, feeling a new rush of motivation to keep working hard rushing through her body.

"Yes, boss!"

They will find a way out. Natasha was sure of that.

#mystic messenger #mysmes #mysme #mm #suit saeran #saeran choi #mm saeran #saeran x oc #mm oc #oc natasha stakh #had a pocket au brainrot for a while now so here's my spin on it :)#and yes i will put freckles on saeran whenever i draw him that's the law

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