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stilemawillow · 2 years

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A Poem for the Right Person [Levi | Reader]

a poem for the: i - wrong person; ii - right person

Knights, fairytales, Prince Charming, a damsel in distress. Standard universal formula. An unfortunate pretty girl struggles with her unfair life, meets her Prince, survives a crucial misfortune, gets back to her beloved and they live happily ever after. Standard formula.

Comparing yourself to the main heroine would be quite presumptuous. Somebody who wrote poems to express their feelings wasn’t somebody who had a realistic grasp on the world surrounding them. A dreamer could make of the worst heartbreak a beautiful tragedy. He could make of the simplest gesture a literary piece full of colours and meaning. He could see a teacup and whip up a quick fantasy about the life of the person who’d last touched it. He could watch death and say it’s kindness. He could live years of unrequited love and say it’s simply meant to be, in some life, in some form – that it’s beautiful and fulfilling despite its misfortune. You were that kind of hopeless unrealized dreamer.

Because you observed people and you couldn’t help it – thinking what their thoughts consisted of, thinking their smallest of movements and changes of expression held meaning. You couldn’t help thinking whatever was meant to happen would happen regardless of you and your actions. Fate was fate and you were yourself – nothing more and nothing less, and you couldn’t affect anything – you could only sit and write it down. Now, Corporal Levi Ackerman had a contrasting opinion.

“It’s been a year. You’ve gone nowhere near a confession.” He was at his desk, working through a discouraging amount of paperwork as you sat on the small couch on his right, pondering your newest poem and recklessly ignoring the duties he’d burdened you with. Well, not exactly “burdened” because, a week after you’d moved into your new quarters, you’d begged him to have you repay his kindness in some way. He refused at first before settling on a simple secret deal. You became his personal assistant and he let you stay in that room. Your duties entailed bringing him tea, helping him with non-confidential paperwork, fixing him baths sometimes and memorising the times of his meetings for him. Even if you didn’t fulfil those duties he’d never kick you out of your quarters. It was more of a “make yourself feel useful” kind of deal.

“Because I don’t want to. He’ll reject me.” You were tapping against the paper in your lap and it would take you a few seconds to realise the ink had created an ugly blotch in its margin. Did “failure” rhyme with “gesture”? Could you sell it well enough? Maybe? The current topic was something the Corporal often pursued when you were buried to your knees in his paperwork. Midnight was closing in but you always refused to go to sleep – thus why he’d already given up on asking you. Your love life was in a stalemate. Both the one he thought you had with Eren Jaeger and the one you realistically envisioned in your head.

“And if he doesn’t?” It’s really ironic that he didn’t know he was the “he” in question. Him finding you in front of the locked closet had been the catalyst, of course. The poem had been the second part. Him urging you into action was something else entirely. Giving you the empty room was kindness and trying to play the very bad part of your wingman was beyond baffling. Jaeger this, Jaeger that – you talked less of him when you loved him. A year later, that tragic love had been slowly replaced with a strong warm feeling of camaraderie. Levi Ackerman didn’t know that. So he pushed you still. To sit next to the teal-eyed cadet, to talk to him, to spar with him, to confess to him. For a man so perceptive and observant, he sure wasn’t well-versed in the art of romantic feelings. “I see you’re spacing off.” You’d forgotten to answer and now he was looking at you.

“I’m sorry, sir. I’ll---“

“How many times do I have to tell you it’s Levi? I feel more disrespected when you don’t follow my orders to disregard my title.” Not exactly a bark, but it was cold and it was a reprimand. Your shoulders shrunk in mild shame and you clenched your pen tighter. This little “call me by my name” deal had happened about three months ago. He’d gotten so fed up with listening to “sir” this, “sir” that, he lashed out at you one night and ordered you use his name when it was just you two. Two reasons for that: first, you had the unpleasant habit to constantly remind him he was your superior; second, for about two hours every night, he didn’t want to be your superior.

“I’m sorry.” It was a timid apology, accompanied by a low voice and a pair of shamefully downcast eyes. Truth be told, you had no idea whatsoever your Corporal harboured a smidge of affection for you, which might as well put you in the category for “observant but oblivious” with him. Also, speaking his name – something you’d refused to do ever since he’d first ordered it – wasn’t something that came easy to your heart. When he first lashed out, you dropped the honorifics, leaving empty spaces where an address to him should originally reside. You still did that.

“Just write the damn poem.” He was looking back at his papers when your gaze snapped up to meet his. The grey was focused on the parchment and the ink but it was almost as if both of you could hear the way your heart sped up dangerously. At your baffled silence, he elaborated: “I can see it’s on your mind. Barf it on the paper and get back to work. You’re going to fuck up my documents if your thoughts are otherwise engaged.” Sounded logical. And a bit too kind of him. You bit back a smile and did as you were told.

The rhymes weren’t perfect the first time around, it was a bit short and a bit vague and you were stuck on the last two lines for about twenty minutes. You were watching him the whole time and, every time his gaze would flicker in your direction impassively, you’d feel a gulp get stuck in your throat. It was astonishing, how well you’d learned to cover it up, contrary to your crush for Eren, where you became a blabbering red mess in need of a visit to the infirmary. Maybe it was because you felt more comfortable in the presence of the Lance Corporal.

He always said the right things, even when they were vulgar. Always at the right time, too. He was welcoming in his manner. He let you babble for hours on end about things he surely wasn’t a single bit interested in. He got mad at you on three occasions only: for spilling ink because it hardly washed off, for being late and for performing below average during training. Not for fucking up his tea, as you realised once you’d substituted salt for sugar and he drank it all; not for messing up his documents; not for cracking his floorboard by tripping; not for waking him in the middle of the night and begging him to please help you get your door back on its fringes; not for falling asleep on the couch in his office and drooling on the cushions; not for accidentally hitting him with the wooden dagger during training; not for being the most terrible cook when you were on kitchen duty; not for being incapable of something as simple as brushing a horse properly. Not for many other things either.

Half of those accidents had occurred mostly due to the fact you’d been a bit too mesmerized by him to pay attention to the task at hand. It was weird how in a matter of months, the things that were so enrapturing about Eren became simple features that called forth in you sympathy and respect, whereas your superior turned into, weirdly enough, not a glorified version of what he’d once been. Contrary to worship, your attitude towards him exuded more appreciation.

He wasn’t the most handsome man, the smartest or the best. He was just the best man to you. The lilac crescents under his eyes didn’t disappear – they became something for you to worry about. The pallor didn’t turn into porcelain – it turned into skin you wished to touch. The cold glare didn’t turn soft and affectionate – it became one you wanted to have on you. His voice wasn’t suddenly smooth like honey – it was deep and husky and mostly cold, but it was now a voice you could recognise across a full mess hall of rowdy cadets. It was weird. You noticed more and more of his kindness every day – and to think it had been there the whole time was astounding, because there was much more than what you’d pinpointed at the beginning. You sometimes pestered him by noting on your case file.

“I’ll grab these,” you could see he was about to fall asleep in his chair, “and I’ll drop them off tomorrow before breakfast.” You stood and he nodded in understanding, didn’t bother arguing and, when you returned half an hour later, his face was resting on his desk and you had to place a blanket over him after blowing out the candles. You went back to your room, wrote a passage in your journal, edited and rewrote the poem on another piece of paper, finished all the documents you’d been too spaced off to work on earlier and went to bed with the stacks of paper next to you.

It was a few hours later when a knock sounded at your door – you jumped immediately, knowing the Corporal always knocked and left when you were sleeping in. Your hair was the usual mess and your lids only opened after you poured a cold bucket of water on your head. You hastened to comb your hair and put on your uniform, hastened to tuck the journal under your mattress and, in a frenzied hurry, gather all the strewn papers and bring them to his office. You were out of the door in less than ten minutes, visiting his office, knowing he’d left for the mess hall, and leaving the messy pile of documents on his desk. You almost cringed at the impending lecture that awaited.

It was about noon when you were sparring with Mikasa and the Corporal ordered a short break for the cadets prior to silently giving you a “come hither” sign with his finger. You jogged to his side, pretended to ask him something about the combat moves you’d been practising and then he shut you down when you both realised nobody was paying you any attention. Being smitten with somebody you always needed an excuse to talk to was quite the pain in the ass.

“I’ll be delivering the paperwork to Erwin at today’s meeting. You dropped them off?” His gaze was on your face and you felt your heart beat faster. You nodded and shamefully looked around – still, nobody was paying attention to your pair. This might as well be pinned an intimate conversation because your fellow cadets as well as his fellow superiors had no actual idea he’d relocated your quarters and made you his personal assistant.

“Yes, sir. But I didn’t---“

“Arrange them? Would’ve guessed that much myself.” He clicked his tongue and your lips pursed in bashfulness – of course, he’d know. You never arranged them and when you did it was such a badly done job, he always had to redo it. He never once scolded you for that. Just once he’d told you you’d learn if you were promoted. And that had been the end of it. “I’ll sort them myself. Have my tea ready before dinner.” His patience, truly, sometimes seemed endless. You nodded, loudly addressed him as sir, and went on to quietly ask his preference for tea. “Chamomile.” His fingers rose to your shoulder and dusted it off, lightly brushing your neck and making goosebumps rise along its length. “Go back to the field, (L/N). And keep up the good performance.” Praise from him really made your whole day.

You grinned brightly, nodded, held back a salute and relished in the sound of your surname out of his mouth prior to swivelling and not catching for a second how his fingers lingered at the collar of your uniform. You walked with a pep in your step, hummed a tune during lunch and received three separate comments from your comrades how you were in a good mood. Truly, you were. You were whistling on your way to your quarters, straight-up singing whilst showering and then decided to tuck the stray paper with last night’s poem in your journal. Except it wasn’t on your bed where you left it. It wasn’t on the floor, under the bed, in the drawers of your nightstand. You were sitting in your towel when realisation hit you. In your morning haste, you’d misplaced the poem and put it with the Corporal’s paperwork.

“Oh, no.” Your eyes widened comically and you hastened to rise. “Fuck!” The curse slipped out as you rushed out the door and barged into his office. “Corporal, please, don’t touch---“ You almost swallowed your tongue when you saw Eren Jaeger sitting on the couch you usually occupied as the ebony-haired superior sifted through papers at his desk. “The paperwork.” It went out as a wheeze, you were still in your towel and it was dripping onto the floor you’d been polishing last week. “This is a misunderstanding. I mean, I didn’t know this was the Corporal’s office, I, this, um, we, well…” They were watching you – wet hair and a decent portion of bare body, and you never thought this was how you’d die.

“Jaeger, have some fucking decency.” The ebony-haired superior snapped at the brunet, who immediately whipped his head in the opposite direction – so fast, in fact, you heard his neck pop. He mumbled a loud but barely coherent “I’m sorry, sir”, then Levi Ackerman was the only one whose eyes were on you. He looked by no means enthralled by the sight and you realised it was just because he saw you as nothing but a soldier. Still, you weren’t experienced enough to notice the painfully clenched jaw and the stiff hands clutching each other over his desk. You couldn’t see the pursed lips and you were entirely blind to the way his eyes refused to comply with his own order regarding decency. “What did you want, cadet?”

“The papers. I need them back.” One of your hands was latched onto the towel around your body as the other one pointed in the direction of his desk, and when he asked for your reasoning, you felt your throat shrivel up to the point of no return. Because you left a love poem for him there and didn’t want him to read it? You couldn’t exactly say that. “Personal matter.” You barely spit it out, seeing as his sharp gaze was incessantly scanning your face and just sometimes bouncing to your bare shoulders. Your anticipation was building up – you’d come this far and humiliated yourself this much, might as well actually retrieve the cause for this whole fiasco. You saw this situation unfolding in at least ten different ways – and your superior played out not a single one of them.

“We sorted them already. There were no personal matters involved.” His glare was nestled in the crevice of your collarbones prior to meeting your frightened gaze. Might as well die on the spot – how in the hell hadn’t they found it? What did that mean? It had fallen? It was being swept up and down by the wind for anybody to randomly find and read? You felt dizzy at the prospect. “Go and get dressed now. Jeager might sprain his neck if he keeps straining it.” The mockery was prominent, stated in an unfazed monotone. You dipped your head and exited his office with slumped shoulders. And, right after the door had closed behind you, Eren was finally free to part his gaze from the wall behind him. Five minutes later, he finally built the courage to speak.

“I actually found it, sir. I swear I didn’t mean to look, my eyes just scanned it.” Frantic teal hues bounced around the room as he held the stray piece of paper with the poem on it. He expected for his superior to aim a reprimand at him or – even worse – a punch. He did neither. His glare was sharp, then he sighed and, instead of addressing the invasion of your privacy, inquired as to his thoughts on the matter. Eren was briefly taken aback. Then he wet his lips and fumbled with the paper. “It’s endearing. She writes beautifully. I never knew she felt that way.” A small smile fought its way onto his lips. Levi’s heart was clenching at his words.

“Should’ve seen the first.” There was reminiscence on his mind and ice on his tongue. This was it. Eren Jeager finally learned about your feelings – after almost two years. He’d return them and then Levi would have finally played his role as your knight properly. Things would be done. You’d stay his assistant and the only comfort he’d draw from you would be the terrible tea you sometimes made for him or the shy smile on your lips as you waited for him in his office after he was done with meetings. All would be well. Then Jaeger spoke.

“There’s more than one? Well, what I’m seeing is enough.” He chuckled just a bit but, upon further inspection, Levi found scattered remains of bitterness along his features. “She almost makes unrequited love sound beautiful, if I have to be honest.” Levi’s brows furrowed and – how the hell could this fucking brat say this so casually? The superior’s mouth was struggling not to lash out at the boy. First, he had to make sure the brown-haired idiot had an actual grasp on the situation and what it meant.

“Unrequited?” He echoed flatly, watching the teal hues scan the poem with a hint of bashfulness. “You don’t return her feelings?” Now his second question made Eren Jaeger face him properly. In fact, so properly and so abruptly his neck could be heard popping for the second time that day. About seven different emotions passed along the brunet’s countenance before his expression settled in a constipated look.

“I don’t--- what?” Eren Jaeger might’ve been dumber than Levi thought – what with not getting the gist of the fact you liked him and all that. Then the teenager shook his head and met the adult’s grey hues. “Sir, I think you’re misunderstanding.” Levi’s frown deepened. What exactly could he be misunderstanding? If anything, Jaeger was the one who--- “This poem’s about you.” Levi’s thought died down immediately. His heart froze in his chest. He, all of him, froze. Then the boy kept talking. “I mean, I could be wrong. But with the grey eyes and the indifference and---“

“What the fuck do you mean it’s about me?” He was lost and confused. His frown was now deadly. Eren Jaeger fumbled with the paper and scanned the lines till he found what he needed, his finger tapped the one word he’d been looking for and then his bright orbs were back to Levi’s tense figure.

“It says right here – “sir”. Maybe you should read it.” The raven immediately shook his head and argued that he shouldn’t. The teenager argued back and they kept throwing phrases back and forth, slowly rising from their respective seats and almost beginning to scream at each other. Levi was vehemently defending your privacy all the while protecting his own feelings – because if Jaeger was right then it meant--- “I already did it accidentally. If you’d please read it and stop arguing with me--- It’s all in here. Just---“

Levi’s nerves snapped and he snatched the piece of paper Jaeger’s hand was frantically waving around. Your handwriting was neat and small and it had surely undergone an improvement since he forced you into helping him with his paperwork. Levi’s hand held the paper to his desk as he leaned over it and scanned the words. It was about him. It really was. The fucking brat could read and he’d read between the lines well enough to recognise Levi. The superior’s stomach flipped unpleasantly.

“Dismissed, Jaeger.” His eyes were glued to the lines and the cadet was approaching the door. He hadn’t yet opened it when he turned around and timidly, almost quietly, begged the ebony-haired Corporal to let you down gently because he’d never wish to see you heartbroken. The raven’s jaw clenched. As if he’d like to see that. “I’m afraid she’s prepared for it, Jaeger. Now get out.” His voice was sharp and imperative, colder than the arctic snow. The door shut behind the brunet, then the pale man fell back in his chair and put a hand to his forehead. He was getting a headache.

“You’re cold and indifferent and oh so stern, you’re silent or raging, you give no clue still your eyes are made of flames, they burn. Grey is, I concede, my new favourite hue.

You work, rest a bit, and again that work and then you steal the breath from me; your callused hands so gentle they almost irk there’s no question, yours I want to be.”

“… yours I want to be.” He found himself quietly echoing the words in the solitude of his office. His heart was heavy and his eyes were strained but they couldn’t stop scanning the lines – over and over and over again, till they began hurting, and even afterwards. His callused fingers were clutching the paper and he was becoming increasingly aggravated with himself and with the situation. This wasn’t good. But then again – the next few lines were exactly about that.

“This is bad, forbidden, wrong – no, we’ve said once before love is nothing short of strong age and rank won’t let me adore you but I want more, don’t paint this as a chore.

Kindness overflows, you listen your generosity hidden behind frowns; I cannot describe the bliss in my heart – royalty should not wear crowns you, broken gem, glisten brighter; is this sin?

I love, love, love you; the ice and the fire, and every time you ask who I want to say with ire not the one you think is true but you, you’re my one desire.

Teach me, speak or not, hate me, love me or reproach, my heart you caught, I care not of your approach; in strength and thought, my feelings are a knot.”

“… fucking certainly sin, yes. I’m a fucking idiot.” He couldn’t stop mumbling curses, until every next word of the poem made him just spill an endless waterfall of “fuck”, over and over again, quiet and angry, then loud and angry, then loud and frustrated, then quiet and defeated. It went up and down and nobody but him could tell why he was cursing so much, nobody but him could reason with the stupid knot his own feelings had become. He sighed, then once more and when his eyes went back to that “I love, love, love you”, his foot landed a kick to the dest in front of him.

“I’m sorry for never using your name I’m sorry for wishing to see you smile I’m sorry for my shame I’m sorry for my thoughts, they’re vile I’m sorry, I’m to blame I’m sorry, I wish to watch you for a while I’m sorry, I know you’re not the same I’m sorry, age and rank are actually hostile I’m sorry, sir, for calling you “sir” so much, wish we could reconcile.”

He wanted to argue but he had only an empty office to argue with. He kicked his desk again and the abuse pushed it back and tipped over a stack of papers. He couldn’t care less. His free hand was massing his temple and his lips were pursed into a straight line. It hurt. It hurt that he had to read nine consecutive apologies about things he had no idea you’d been thinking. The fucking words hurt more than everything else. Age and rank and sorry and the “sir” made a strangled growl leave his lips. He wanted to crumple the stupid paper and throw it out the window. He wanted to go and beat up Jaeger. He wanted to go and scream in your face. He wanted also, to scream at his own face, for being so dumb and oblivious, so fucking inconsiderate and so fucking reckless.

“So allow your dutiful eyes to stray for this one thing, this little cue, just to hear me for the first time say I give my heart, useless as it is, to you.”

“… fuck.” He was tired. He was frowning. He kept rereading it. Kept thinking about lying to you and keeping it. Kept cursing. How was it possible to hate yourself all the more when it turned out the one you love loved you back? Truly, Levi hated himself when he read. He despised himself when he put the poem down and kicked his desk one last time. And he entirely loathed himself when he folded it and headed to your quarters – because there was exactly one way out of this situation and he would be who he’d always been – the asshole who tried to make things right by saying all the wrong things.

“Jaeger found it.” He knocked and you let him in and it was the first thing he said. Your expression was hardly confident. You were looking down at your lap, where you’d been writing in your journal a second ago. You didn’t bother closing it. You met your superior’s gaze and asked him if he’d read it as he handed it to you. You kept your fingers far from his during the exchange. He was silent for a bit, then he took a sharp breath and it was all you needed. “… yes. He did, too.” Your eyes glued themselves to the comforting sight of your journal. “Suddenly you can’t look me in the eye.” His comment made you frown.

“I apologise for the shame I’m feeling.” You drawled ironically, making his jaw clench as he watched you. You were trying to shrink away into nothingness and your discomfort was visible. It made Levi just a bit angry. Just the exact amount of angry to open his mouth and be the asshole he kept incessantly trying to prove to you he was. This would be his final argument. He would do you a lot of good. And himself some bad for the sake of the greater good.

“No need for sarcasm, (L/N).” He reproached coldly, stepping just a bit closer to the bed where you sat and glaring at the top of your head. “What do you expect me to do?” He saw your fingers twitch over the journal and crumple the poem just a bit. “Do you think the rules suddenly won’t matter and I’m going to sweep you off your feet and profess my undying love for you?” His voice was harsh and cold and you shook your head with a small argument that you’d never wanted that. “Then what do you expect me to do?” He was mad. He was mad and you could feel it. Your shoulder shrunk further and you told him you expected him to do what he’d always done. “And how am I supposed to do that?”

“What do you mean---“

“How the fuck am I supposed to stay neutral? How am I supposed to help you with your stupid confession if it’s aimed at me? You realise nothing here can work, right? Fuck age and rank, rules don’t allow it.” His voice had raised and he was almost furious. He could see by the jump of your shoulders there were sobs stuck in the back of your throat. “You should stop feeling this way. And don’t you fucking dare cry. Because you’re giving me all and every opportunity to do something I know I shouldn’t do.” Wrong line. Wrong. He was so angry. Fucking furious. If he saw one tear (he wouldn’t manage, he wouldn’t manage) he’d completely lose his cool. “Jaeger said you make unrequited love sound beautiful. I think it’s outright ugly, but I have no taste. I’ve never had taste. The current situation is a perfect example of that.” He was spitting venom and spite and your uncomprehending gaze left your lap to take a glance of his visage. He was already facing the door. Thank God for that, otherwise you might see him crumble. “Take the day off, cadet. You’re still my assistant in the morning.” His voice went back to being cold and emotionless and he heard the first of many sobs echo on the other side of the door when he shut it.

You took the day off, as per his order. You didn’t show up to afternoon training. Didn’t show up in the mess hall for dinner. Didn’t show up in his office to help him pick up the papers he left lying on the floor. The sun had barely risen when he woke from his restless slumber because somebody opened the door of his office. You walked inside and found the place a mess. He hadn’t bothered collecting the paperwork, much less delivering it to the Commander. You got to work with that. And by the time he’d taken his morning shower and put on his uniform, you’d made the trip to the Commander’s office and left on the Lance Corporal’s desk his morning cup of tea, just how he liked it.

You knew if you didn’t go to him he wouldn’t risk painting your pair as suspicious by approaching you himself. Thus why you kept a safe distance from him and snuck papers and drinks in and out of his office when he wasn’t there. You spent a lot of time thinking too, to the point it made you bite the dust twice during combat training. You saw through his strategy. Playing the terrible asshole really didn’t suit him. You were sure he didn’t return your feelings but that didn’t mean you were blinded enough by your pessimism to miss he cared for you to some degree, much like how he cared of every soldier serving under him. For the sake of the rules and for the sake of preventing you from making a fool of yourself, he wished you’d hate him. It was something you could never do.

And, the same evening, when you entered his office with his late-night tea, you intended to make that clear. You left the cup at the edge of his desk and he glanced at you once whilst working on the late report he should’ve started yesterday. The desk was between you when you spoke, stiffly and awkwardly, with just a pinch of confidence.

“Sir, I know it’s not my place to meddle with your good intentions---“ the mere act of him taking one second to glare up at you made your voice hitch along with your breath, then you slowly recollected yourself and kept going, “but trying to be an asshole didn’t work. On the contrary, my case file is growing.” You heard him click his tongue at that. “I know you don’t like me but there’s no need to encourage my hatred for you in order to protect me.” His right hand halted as it wrote, then he sharply put his pen down and ordered you to sit down. You almost tripped in your haste to land on the couch.

“I want you to listen to me now.” He rubbed his temples with a sigh as you waited, pursed lips and clammy hands fidgeting in your lap. “I know you’re not one for acting. You probably would’ve never admitted your feelings if I hadn’t stumbled upon them by chance.” You didn’t dare nod but he was right. “I realise you won’t beg me to return them, make me feel them or throw yourself at me.” You couldn’t face him for the life of you. “You won’t say my name, much less try to kiss me or touch me. I have to ask – do you want to?” You went red in shame because, yes, you wanted to and yes, you wouldn’t dare try anything physical.

“What do you want to hear?” You asked instead, avoiding honesty and giving him the chance to withdraw from the conversation. You didn’t want to admit it – you’d hate to, honestly, but you wouldn’t object to conceding it if he requested it of you. After all, you had to set things straight and let everything proceed as it had – with you writing poems of unrequited love and him being unbelievably king and tolerant toward you.

“The truth.” His gaze was hard and you shamefully nodded your head for fear your voice might betray you. It was enough for him nonetheless. He clicked his tongue. “Alright then. You’re seventeen. We’re in the army. The circumstances are shit. I don’t like going against rules or my own moral grounds. So I won’t lay a hand on you until you turn of age.” Your brows rose and your eyes widened – what was that supposed to mean? As if having sensed your surprise and confusion, he elaborated. “After that, it’s up to you. Until then, I want that poem.” His voice was soft and quiet, like he was sharing a secret. You met his gaze and there were probably stars in your eyes. This was, far as you and the dreamer in you were concerned, an indirect confession. “And fix the fucking ending, your heart isn’t useless.”

He avoided eye contact and went back to his normal self. You glanced at the door, then your eyes moved back to his countenance. His shoulders were tense and you took a deep breath, asking him, in the shakiest voice you hated hearing from your mouth, if he could close his eyes for a second. They narrowed at your expression, then rolled in defeat and finally closed. You sighed and he could hear you get up from the couch. One step in his direction, then another. The third brought your feet right by his chair. He could hear your heart – or just his own. Light pressure on his jaw – three trembling fingers. Then your lips rested at the corner of his mouth.

“It’s unfortunate the right poem came into the hands of the wrong person this time around.” You were whispering against his skin and his hands were itching to reach up and grab you. And to think you were trying to prove to him you could throw yourself at him after all. This was wrong, correct. But that was why his eyes were closed and why he refused to move even when every fibre of his being wanted to hold you. How despicable of him, to fall for the underage cadet whose heart he’d casually picked off the floor that night he found you in front of the closet. “Thank you for always being so kind, Levi.” Your smile was pressed against the corner of his mouth, his jaw clenched and you smelled of soap and flowers. “Fuck” yet again seemed to be the only word in his mind.

You stepped back, promised you’d give him the poem tomorrow morning and fled the office. His eyes opened only after he heard the door close behind you. He flexed his hands and got back to work, and when the folded stray piece of paper appeared on the edge of his desk the following day, he tucked it in the breast pocket of his jacket and went about his day as he always did. Your eyes would sometimes meet across the mess hall or during training, you’d bring him tea and help him with his paperwork, and sometimes, when he thought of you, his hand strayed toward the secret in his pocket.

He’d wait for you and he’d be your knight. You’d wait for him and you’d be his damsel. You’d live through hardships and get a mediocre happily ever after if you were lucky. Standard fairytale formula. Until then, the perfect combination was finally achieved – the right poem for the right person. And that was enough.

#levi x reader #levi ackerman x reader #reader insert #levi ackerman fanfiction #snk x reader #levi being a wingman not realising he's the object of affection #eren being wingman not realising he was the past object of affection #misunderstandings are my absolute favourite thing to write lol #not too romantic #wanted to keep it real #cause like y'know age difference and stuff

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justaboutsnapped · 3 years

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East Asian! Joly & Ferre headcanons (From an actual East Asian)

As I am frustrated by the lack of authentic representation in les mis fics featuring East Asian amis (they’re either stereotypically Asian™ or really westernized ), I decided to compile some stuff that... idk... les mis writers could draw from maybe There’s Joly because he’s the one most commonly depicted as East Asian, and also Ferre because that’s my personal headcanon lol, if I ever do a part 2 in the future I’ll throw in some other characters

Note: I am a first gen Chinese immigrant living in Canada, so these headcanons are highly influenced by my specific experience. I’m obviously not speaking for every East Asian ever.

Everything is under the cut because it got absurdly long, I was having too much fun with this lol (also things got increasingly random and specific sorry not sorry)...

First gen Joly/Ferre. Dammit, I just want one fic where Joly/Ferre is an immigrant. It would be so interesting, and it definitely brings a new perspective to the amis. I wanna see them struggling to overcome the cultural barrier.

Related to the first gen thing, at least in my experience a lot of schools, when teaching English, will try to teach the students to speak in RP??? Imagine if they’re in the US and they’re just speaking RP lol, idk if my humour is wack but hhhhh this is funny

Another first-gen thing: international schools are totes a thing in Asia, and you don’t necessarily have to be a foreigner to go. This means that immigrants can be actually insanely good at English.

✨academic anxiety✨(lmao I’m projecting so much onto this) If y’all are gonna write them as the Smart Asian™ you might as well sprinkle some school/grades-related anxiety in there, cos they pretty much come hand in hand.

Absolutely NO SHOES are to be worn inside their apartments. I feel like this one is a given.

Emoticons - Emoticons are much more widely used in East Asia than the west. Cue Joly using orz at the end of a text to Bossuet, and have to explain to a confused Bossuet what it means (orz looks like a person on their hands and knees, and is used to convey fatigue, frustration, etc.)

Other texting conventions - Not gonna list them all because it’ll take ages, but in Chinese a popular way to convey laughter is 233333, meanwhile in Korean it’s kkkkk, etc. They probably accidentally text it to the rest of the amis often and eventually they know what they mean too.

Water - You bet your ass that they boil their water. I can see Joly being very into drinking hot water with gouji berries in them (cos it’s supposedly healthy), and carrying a thermos of the stuff with him all the time. I feel like Ferre likes to drink cold water though (it still would be boiled).

This one might seem obvious but they’d celebrate traditional festivals??? Maybe I’m reading the wrong fics but I’ve yet to see one where they actuall do that- It’d be so cute if they make dumplings for the amis on Lunar New year or bring mooncakes for the Amis to try on Mid-Autumn Festival. Maybe they’ll wear their traditional clothing on those special days too. (Head empty no thoughts just long-haired Ferre wearing hanfu)

This is very random but I find it hilarious soooo: Marius mentioning General Tso’s Chicken is his favourite Chinese dish and Joly has to restrain Ferre from murdering him. For context: General Tso’s Chicken is a famous Chinese fast food dish, but it’s not an actual Chinese dish. I, personally, have never eaten it until I moved to Canada. Idk Ferre just seems like he’d be interested in traditional calligraphy, he’d be amazing at it.

Joly studies western medicine but his parents raised him on traditional medicine so some of their teachings still stick. Like Joly would tell the amis to not eat too much fried food because it makes them shanghuo. He once translated shanghuo straight and said “on fire” and it caused panic until he clarified what it actually means.

Joly makes Combeferre watch soppy k-dramas with him. Ferre complains but secretly enjoys them (he’d never admit it though).

If they’re from the same country they’d gossip about the amis in [insert language] for sure. Also would be interesting if they both speak dialect, and find each other’s dialect very difficult to understand. Some amusing misunderstandings could occur

They. Love. Instant. Ramen. Idk I just personally really love it lol and I feel like East Asians love it wayyy more than westerners so they’d probably love it.

Snacks. They’d have all these amazing snacks from Asian supermarkets. Joly may have gotten all the amis hooked on the White Rabbit candy (it’s a chinese staple). They also both have a disdain for Wagon Wheels because Lotte Choco Pie is clearly superior.

#joly #combeferre #les mis #les amis de l'abc #les mis headcanons

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catiuapavel · 3 years

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for the ask meme: tactics ogre & final fantasy tactics lol

Tactics Ogre

the character i least understand

I will say if I were Vernotta, I'd simply push my ugly husband the king down the stairs and forgive the handmaiden he had great power and influence over but I guess you can't make much out of a royal with 5 lines and a half who is only ever seen treating a servant cruelly.

interactions i enjoyed the most

I love Catiua's interactions with and about the Dark Knights but more so with Lanselot's. The understanding she shows of him and the genuine admiration she has for his methods, even after he abandons her... It holds something over me. He also understands her and uses this to further his goals but I also thinks he underestimates how much she gets him in return.

I always have this praise she has for him on Princess route when she meets Barbas and martym in the Hanging Gardens in mind and the respect she has for what he accomplished in Lodis and for how he intended to put her on the throne. She parallels him in a few aspects and she proves this with this dialogue.

I also appreciate Catiua and Denam's exhanges a great deal. A lot of care was put into writing a convincing yet trouble adoptive sibling dynamic.

the character who scares me the most

Oz? In a morbid "I would still let him remove my fingernails one by one" way. I'm enthralled yet also terrified.

Otherwise... Barbas.

the character who is mostly like me

(looks endearingly at Chaos Vyce) He's just like me......

In truth 90% of Vyce's character couldn't be less like me but he has this one line in his duel on Chaos route that has made me feel seen and understood in a rare way and echoed my own complicated feelings on a shared trauma so as a result, he's the character who is mostly like me.

hottest looks character

dating me is crazy like you really have to be at peace with the fact that you're a placeholder until I meet ozma moh glacius

one thing i dislike about my fave character

I once read that Matsuno would have liked to add 3 entire routes to chapter 4 for Vyce, Denam and Catiua and ever since I read this I cry myself to sleep at how interesting a hypothetical entire Princess route could have been. Alas, games do not have eternal budgets and eternal time for development.

one thing i like about my hated character

I do not know if I have a most hated character but at the bottom of the "people I do not care about" list is Bayin.

Bayin always hates me, no matter the playthrough. I have to respect him for that. Seethe more, old man.

a quote or scene that haunts me

Imagine you have been playing this game for years and jumping back through anchor points over and over and you look at your timeline one day in the Warren report to see the sidequests you've completed and you see a lost character icon somewhere and the scene description does not sound remotely familiar. It's a scene that's somehow appeared because you never properly completed a sidequest in one of your many re-plays.

You watch it. You feel hollow. You understand why this was so far hidden in the report. You lay awake thinking about it at night every week.

That's the scene.

a death that left me indifferent

Xapan on chaos route. I mean, good for you Vyce for passing your nerves on him!

a character i wish died but didn’t

Wait, you mean there are characters who make it out unscathed? The thing about Tactics Ogre is that you may just get your character death wish in another route- or you can kill them yourselves if they're recruitable.

That being daid I would like nothing more than to see Balxephon dead in an upcoming sequel, in the way you want to see a character you adore die the miserable death they deserve.

my ship that never sailed

Most of my Tactics Ogre ships didn't sail but I usually like them one-sided, dead, miserable or downright toxic so I don't usually care to see them sail.

I will however say I desperately wanted Canopus/Andoras to sail (clenches fist)

----

Final Fantasy Tactics

the character i least understand

I think maybe... Argath? I can't understand being this much of a little bitch sorry.

interactions i enjoyed the most

Naturally I enjoyed Ovelia and Delita's interactions the most, I think theirs may be the most interesting ones in the game, I especially loved to see how it spiraled down in the end and he became gradually less aware to how miserable he was making her yet how you could read some genuine care toward her which she could no longer perceive herself.

Also the way she misunderstands him in the end and thinks him to be more callous than he actually is, like in this scene where she spies on him and interprets him to murder Valmafra in cold blood simply because she lacks a clear view on the event, is so good. It's a tragedy how they both can't read the other in the end and harm each other as a result (And I eat this up).

the character who scares me the most

I mean anyone should be rightfully terrified of any of the Lucavi for a start but I have to say, were I to dine with Dycedarg, I'd be terrified to touch my plate.

the character who is mostly like me

I asked my boyfriend this question and he replied "Tietra, because she is cute... and has brown hair... and probably reads books" which I find hilarious so I will roll with it. I guess she looks most like me at the very least?

Generally there is often something about the way Matsuno explores family issue, especially between siblings, that's just relatable in a way not many other games are. And for this reason I always relate to Rapha in how she feels about Marach.

hottest looks character

Zalbaag Beoulve (fans self). He isn't my usual type but he has something of an aura.

one thing i dislike about my fave character

My favourite character is Delita and what I truly hate about Delita is that I cannot make a joke about Delita's wrongdoings without the most annoying Delita haters and Delita lovers showing up in my mentions to fight because they have no humour.

They're coming for me already, I have to go.

one thing i like about my hated character

I absolutely love how Barrington gets thrown off the building. There he goes!

a quote or scene that haunts me

Did you get your end in all of this, Ramza? I... I got this.

😶😶😶😶😶😶😶😶

a death that left me indifferent

Sadly I feel nothing when the Templars die (at the exception of Isilud and Wiegraf). I just kill the rest and move on.

a character i wish died but didn’t

Must we ask for more casualties......

Oh Ovelia apparently? Maybe ? Sometimes I recall how you sent me this article about how Matsuno intended for her to survive the epilogue and I simply prefer my miserable interpretation so that is what I will stick to.

my ship that never sailed

Alma/Ovelia sometimes you just want girls to find love together in their lonely convent

#tactics ogre #final fantasy tactics #EDIT :#long post #sorry i was writing this in between texting and I didn't control the lenght

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like-rain-or-confetti · 3 years

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Can you do a little text with your opinion about the Volturi members? What you like and dislike, they personality, they story... Would be interesting! Kissessss and have a great day! 💜

Imma have a little fun and throw the very young me into the mix to. Let's see child me vs adult me's opinions on the Volturiiii.

Fun fact: I wasn't team Volturi until I was like fifteen. Before that I was team edward... I don't want to talk about that 🤔😒

Also I'm a sucker for villains. If it isn't obvious already, I like the villains more than the heroes. (We all love a bad boy though, don't we?--- TIK TOK NOW IS NOT THE TIMEE.)

So everything i say is just my opinion and should be taken just as that.

Aro: Younger me was like "this...is a terrible person. There really is no need to expand on this." However adult me has been like "GUYS this guy is possibly the SCARIEST character. This man rips off heads AND SMILES ABOUT IT." He gives me child snatcher vibes (from the movies in particular). I thoroughly enjoy the power hungry persona. He's really fitting to be the puppeteer behind the Volturi. Even if he makes it seem it's a group effort with himself, Marcus and Caius. Realistically, Aro gets what he wants and isn't afraid to do what it takes to get it...sorry Didyme. What's even darker about it, WHICH I LOVE, is that he isn't heartless. Smeyer wrote that Aro genuinely loved his sister. It's all good to have a character that's a evil heartless monster but what's more terrifying to me is the ability for someone to do evil despite their love and emotions. It doesn't hold them back and that's what I find particularly frightening now that child me didn't comprehend. Micheal Sheen, from what I remember of his interview years ago, played on the idea that vampires of Aro's age kinda begin to lose their mind. Which, hell freaking yes. However there is one thing I hate for Aro's character that happened in the movies. Breaking dawn part 2. That fucking laugh. Don't get me wrong, hilarious. I can't not laugh but for his character I felt it was too 'hey hey I'm a crazy man hehe'. It was a but too much, even for an eccentric Aro. However, I'm not to mad at it because again, it was funny to watch. I thoroughly enjoy the ‘friendship’ Aro and Carlisle share and i love that it is ‘maintained’ throughout the books. I think it’s just a really nice detail. (I love lore. I am a sucker for it.) The one thing that didnt sit right with me is Aro marrying someone so that he wasnt the alone one whilst his co-leaders were very much in love? Was a little off for me but i suppose that just adds to the character.

Caius: child me would shrink into the seat because what did I do to this man? High key still think I wouldn't want to be Caius' child because imagine doing something wrong and you get that glare? No thank you! Scary angry man. As an adult... "He's an angry boi but...DAYUM WHY IS HE SUDDENLY SO HOT?" Just...don't get angry with me. You'll get annoying real quick and you're too pretty for that. I enjoy the taking-no-shit attitude he has but felt it could have been a little more prominent in BDP2 where Aro asks if Caius' is challenging him. I full believe Caius to an extend would be like "yes, yes I am. Don't be an idiot Aro. Use that braincell!" Which is why I adore the meme vibes I see every now and then of Caius hating Carlisle because why does Aro love that blonde so much? CAIUS HAS BEEN NOTHING BUT LOYAL-- Anyways, I can totally get why Aro wants him on his team. Caius is so angry and has so much hatred that he’s a good asset to the coven, even if not having a special ability.I do find it hard to imagine that Caius is a century older than Aro though. Although I cant picture him over forty years old lol. Although i do personally enjoy the whole Caius x Athenodora route. IT’S TRUE LOVE! Okay so maybe thats a little dramatic but its better than Aro’s lmao.

Marcus: movie Marcus is absolutely not nineteen years old and that's just a fact. If anything, he's the forty year old one lmao. Child me couldn't care about this man. He was the man who said nothing and slumped on a throne. That was Marcus. That was his character summed up. Then adult me rolled in and OMG NO DON'T DO THIS TO THIS SWEET MAN. LET HIM BE IN LOVE. As an adult i definitely became more attached. I feel like i was too young back then to get why Marcus was in the Volturi. He seemed very out of place and like a filler co-leader more than anything. However as i’ve gotten older (and written for him), I recognised that's the point. That’s Marcus’ evident grief. He isn’t there by choice and losing Didyme caused him to fall out of line with the coven. He’s lost point or purpose. Almost like its become meaningless because the love of his life was gone and he couldn't save her.So what was the aims of the Volturi to protect vampire kind when they couldn’t protect their own? He couldnt protect her. I had never heard of anything like bond identification and once i had- i was shook, like it became clear why he had been so necessary in the first place. That really is handy to understand everyones bonds in a coven, he could direct Chelsea and the two alone could destroy covens by bonds alone. Marcus makes the Volturi more realistic in a lot of ways. Like in a family, there is the happy times, goofy people like Felix, the twins representing a close bond. Afton and Chelsea, love that cant be divided. The list really goes on. Marcus represents love and heartbreak, pain, loss grief, the sad moments every family goes through. In that way he makes the coven seem less invincible, a group of people who at the end of the day, have their own weaknesses and immortality doesn’t mean a perfect existence. Especially when, in my opinion, Bella fantasized about immortality and how perfect it would be. Even after her change, she waited for her happy ending because that was somehow guaranteed in some level. Which in the end, she got but not everyone gets that happy ending we all want. I also personally think Marcus is the most feeling of the Volturi, despite being apathetic. A result of heartbreak. It’s shown he can still feel more in his own ways when he voted against Renesmee being destroyed. Furthermore, he advocated that vampire hybrids were a lot like vampires. He made that relation openly before anyone. Its almost as though losing Didyme helped him value a life?

Jane and Alec: Child me thought these two were badass...and that still remains in my adult life. It’s always been uncomfortable to me that someone so young is so sadistic and powerful. Jane is the older twin with the ability of pain illusion...yikes. Her ability was evident in her human life along with Alec’s. His gift is sensory deprivation and these two were my favourites in the whole Saga. Still kind of are if im honest. I thoroughly enjoy the twins backstory. It has the most detail. I have a tag for the twins. Canon!twins is the tag for the twins in their book age. Unless this tag is present, the twins have been aged up :). They are very much canon but I put a bit more emphasis on tantrums. If they get angry, they both have tantrums. So whilst (unless tagged) they aren't children they can be very childish and these tantrums are pretty deadly. They’re also very possessive? I dont even know if thats the right word i’m looking for in all honesty. Lets say they get very attached if they like you. These two are probably the most secluded out of the whole Volturi.

Felix: Felix! High ranking guard due to strength and speed. I am a major supporter of Felix being a gladiator when he was human. He as a lighter grey cloak meaning he isn’t as high ranked but is so good at what he does that he’s been kept for centuries...and a lot of them. Personality? FINALLY, WE’VE GOT ONE WITH PERSONALITY!! (Im writing these out of order and i’ve just finished a chunk of Volturi members who have personalities as invisible as Afton.) Flirtatious and Light hearted, we love flirtatious and light hearted! Basically a comedian! Helllll yes, keep it going! Extremely vicious and highly aggressive? You know what? I still like it. He wouldn’t be a Volturi without a dark side. Cold blooded murderer. Yes. 10/10. Finally, someone Smeyer seems to actually care about. He flirted with Bella a couple of times in the books and i was FOR IT ALL THE WAY. I was very sad i saw none of it in the movies but im used to heartbreak by now. Im in this fandom after all. We were robbed of a lot. Strongest vampire in the world? I believe you, he’s also a hecking treeeeee. HE DO BE A TALL BOI. He actually makes Demetri look small and that’s still hilarious to me. Demetri is actually tall. However, if it isnt obvious we clearly traded backstory for personality. I cant get both smh. So...as i said before I fully believe Felix was a gladiator back in the day, hence his physique and height and excellent fighting abilities he has even as a vampire but then it kind of ends. I will say from the dawn of time, i don’t think Felix is the most academic man, just because of his era. I also think majority of the Volturi couldn’t read of write in their human lives and had to learn much older, most learning as vampires. Felix was one of these vampires, Although even now he isnt the most great at it. Then a wonderful writer known as @wallwriterstuff included it and now it’s canon in my eyes. I fully believe Felix is a slow reader and writing isn’t his strong suit either. Wallwriter also includes the possibility that Felix could be dyslexic which im all for too. For a very long time i’ve considered writing a dyslexic reader with the Volturi but have always hesitated because i don’t have it and wouldn’t want to upset someone for any misunderstandings or inaccuracies. However what i will say is that i think vampires would be the most understanding to humans with dyslexia. Learning things like that in later development or as an adult is difficult and they wouldnt think any less of you for struggling with reading, writing, numeracy- you name it. You’ll probably find they’re with you in the struggle at least half of the time. He’s also the goofball of the Volturi, even though he’s not really a goofball in our eyes, he’s the closest to a goofball out of the whole Volturi ...Emmett beats him in the Goofball wars.

Demetri: Oh yeah, it's Demetri's turn! So Demetri was previously in Amun's coven. When Chelsea gave him the old razzle dazzle...I've said Chelsea's gift so many times at this point it's getting old. I have two characters left after Demetri 😂😂 Anyway, with that Demetri was like "welp, I'm in the Volturi now." And now that they had a better tracker the previous one was kicked out. He isn’t much of a talker, polite and formal. He’s elegant (more graceful than i could ever be) and charming...yeah he is, you can say that AGAIN. He is also very calm, when next to Felix, i think everyone is calm but you know, we’ll say he’s a very calm person. I like how he was originally in the Egyptian coven with Amun. Given Amun’s goals this a pretty nice detail. NOW LETS GO TO MY VERSION. He’s very charming, calm, polite, formal and even a lil’ but quiet, i kept him pretty canon because he actually had a description to go on :)))))))))) Moving on. Demetri can be a very successful flirt when he wants to be and does have a Casanova reputation. However beyond the charming Volturi guard who has a brutal side like the rest of them, he has a chewy centre, deep down. I added that he had a child in his human life, one he doesn’t remember and very few people know about. He remembers that they died of an illness very young (around six?) but can’t remember what they look like. For that reason he doesn’t like talking about his child, he feels awful he doesn’t remember them and the loss still hits a pang in his chest.

Heidi: Alright im ready for this one! Child me didn’t necessarily enjoy Heidi? I was rather passive about her. It was all ‘pretty vampire used for her looks’ in my eyes back then and i was never comfortable with that. I’ll get into my take on Heidi in a moment, roll on the backstory! So Heidi knew Victoria as they used to be coven mates and we’re going to continue on as though Heidi didn’t care when she was killed? Like...its genuinely a burning question in my mind! If she didn't care, could that show the extent of Chelsea’s power in action!? (can we tell im enthusiastic about this coven yet?) It’s quite smart to have someone lure in prey. I wont lie, Heidi has quite the badass role in the coven. I wouldn't have thought about that I reckon. I’ve always thought that showed a kind of superiority. Oh you guys need to hunt your prey? pfft, ours literally comes to us. Her backstory really starts with Heidi being mistreated in her human life...a common theme Smeyer has. It can get old- i wont lie but when i give it some thought it kind of makes sense. Rosalie said it herself in eclipse, if any one of them had their happy ending, they’d be six feet under but i’d love a little bit more creativity. I could go on about how male vampires ended up being changed in comparison to female vampires but i’ll swiftly move on because that’s a whole other thing alone. Heidi was changed out of pity. (Which kinda infuriates me just to type, a pity change? Really? Really Hilda? we’ll see why it annoys me when i explain my take on Heidi.) Heidi was happy in her coven with Hilda, Victoria etc, which is hell yes. We love that. This is around the time she discovered her gift. Vampires were attracted to her and humans fell prey to her easily. Yup okay. I’ll take that. After a newborn vampire caused ‘too much attention’ Aro spared Heidi and Chelsea used her gift on Heidi. Nice, very nice aaaaand that’s where it stops and im left hanging. Personality time with Smeyer! Lets goooo. From what i remember and can find- she didn’t fucking have one. Apparently being pretty is enough for everyone. Which in hindsight, fair enough on a human Bella’s perspective, its literally Heidi’s gift to lure you in no matter what. She could tell you she’s a serial killer (and technically is lmao) and is about to sell your kidneys on the black market as to which you’ll be like ‘sign me the fuck up, want my liver too? Here, let me lie on the table for you. I’m down.’ without even realising what just happened. But even beyond that...Heidi has no personality traits mentioned. In New Moon she appears to be a little flirty which im all for, why the hell not? But...thats it? Thats all I get? Then we get into fanfictions, because i read them growing up. Heidi was depicted as flirtatious, promiscuous and then it varied between manipulative or she wasnt very smart. Which i’m knocking absolutely no one for. I think you can get a badass character who is incredibly dumb. I think all characters are actually valid whether they’re a genius or flat out dumb. I love them all. However it never really sat with me. I was never quite satisfied which i was fine with until i started writing for myself. That’s when i knew i’d have to really think about what my version of Heidi would be or i’d never be happy with my work. That and you also begin to fill in the blanks? The more you write the more you flesh out a character for yourself and so that rolls into my version of Heidi! So for my Heidi, she often gets the same trope of ‘she’s pretty and rich, those types of girls have easy lives who always had everything given to them.’ Then when it’s discovered she didn’t have a good human life. It turns to the next assumption of ‘oh she’s pretty and stupid enough to be used and manipulated’. In a lot of ways, that’s what Heidi wants everyone to think. Underestimate her, please, its all the easier to manipulate you if you do. She’s actually very smart and her rough human life made her more tough and intelligent. She’s very manipulative and yes she’s very flirty. You can look but you cant touch! She enjoys the attention her beauty gets her but if only these people would care more about what she’s like as a person. She’s not a barbie doll she will play you if she needs to. The only one who’s actually gotten far enough to sleep with Heidi is Demetri and even then the two don’t see each other romantically. They’re good friends who thinks the other is very attractive but that's where it ends. They’re basically friends with benefits some times lmao. However, Demetri got that far because he see’s the intellect Heidi actually has and acknowledges it. He thinks shes a queen who should be treated as such. She could take anything she wanted, a storm that people can only hope to survive in one piece. Secretly she enjoys a family setting. Whilst she never really wanted children (especially when she was expected to when human), she couldn't help but melt inside seeing little human children with their loving parents. She wants that for all children. Whether that's because she lacked such affection growing up, no one knows. She’s also a really good friend, you bet she’ll have your back. Crappy ex? Well we’ll show them, wont we (Y/N)? She’ll be a bitch and enjoy every second of it. She also loves the single life, believe it or not, you’ll have more difficulty getting Heidi to settle down than you would Demetri which speaks volumes. So yeah, move past her gift and really get to know her and you might have a very good friend. I also don’t see Heidi having a preference between male or females and that’s in all honesty. Times have changed and if she is attracted to another female then she wont be ashamed of it. She never has been (Demetri was the first to figure that out, Felix may be the last.) Even when the times weren’t approving of different sexualities, she didn't care. She will flirt with you and find it ridiculously cute if you get flustered.

Sulpicia: Sulpicia was an orphan which i used to develop my own version of her. Sulpicia grew to love Aro which im on the fence about but yup, i’ll take it. You’ll see what happens with my version in a bit lmao. and that’s where it stops. I get no personality again but do you know what we do in this fandom? We create one and fill in the blanks baby! So i write Sulpicia very materialistic and vain, she’s most snobbish of the wives and due to the other two, also considered the meaner one. She didnt have such things as a child being an orphan so when she got the opportunity to have it-she jumped. She isnt easily impressed and married Aro not for love but for immortality, money and status. (He’s only married you for your money, princess Jasmine! HE ONLY MARRIED YOU FOR YOUR MONEY! Damn it tik tok, but make it princess Aro) Which works well, because Aro doesnt necessarily love her either, he just wanted a mate so he wasnt the odd one out.He literally created her because he was like “Yup, you’ll do.” The two recognised they made a great team and image so they kinda grew to love each other? A little bit? Sure we’ll say its love...sorta. ANYWAY, It’s a highlight to Sulpicia being locked in that tower where she doesnt need to see Aro every little moment, it’s better than having a husband who she’d need to see everyday. ...Yeah my Sulpicia is something else lmao.

Athenodora: Athenodora is one of the oldest vampires in existence which kinda has me shook but I'll take it. She met Caius when he was fleeing from the Romanians, the two travelled together until they met Aro. Whilst on their nomadic travels they seemingly became mates. That's all we know about that. As to which the Volturi coven was made. Athenodora is completely loyal to Caius as well as highly dependent on him and I think that's very realistic given her circumstances. That's where their story ends...maybe for Smeyer but not for me! 😁 So I picture Caius and Athenodora being different sides of the same coin. Athenodora really mellows Caius, she is no where near is violent and sadistic as he is but due to her unwavering loyalty and dependency, she doesn't feel inclination to go against him...also because of Chelsea and Corin but I've said that so many times in this post I think we get the point. I think she's actually more gentle and soft spoken but that being said. She is very reserved and if she were to be angered she'd very much change. She could cut you down with words alone. Caius loves it. However beyond this is someone who is very maternal. Caius would appreciate it more if the two had children but instead it has created empathy. Caius doesn't want that when he can rip their head off. She struggles a little more with the 'no second chances' and that's another reason why Caius keeps her locked away and away from it. These two love each other more than words can describe. After being through so much with someone, the love can only grow. The two would happily risk their life for the other. Caius is saddened that he could never give her the family she wanted. He knows that to this day, Athenodora tries to reign in that side of her. He's a very supportive husband who's very different around his wife. He's much more tolerant, and angry. Simply more at ease. If anything happened to Athenodora, to put it simply...there would be hell to pay.

Didyme: Married to Marcus and Aro’s biological sister. Cute, me likely, keepy going. Her gift was happiness induction. VERY ADORABLE- Dont be as menacing as your brother...please. She was born several years after Aro and was changed by Aro ten and a half years after he was turned. (Dont tease me with all this lore Smeyer, I know what you’re gonna do) Aro was deeply disappointed her gift was just to make people happy- its okay Didyme, we love you. Aro is just...Aro. Her gift made many fall in love with her and its so freaking cute i CANT- but she only felt the same feelings for Marcus. MY HEART IS SO WARMMMM. Unfortunately they were so happy together that they lost interest in anything Volturi and were ready to leave. (Uh oh.) Aro, being the sneaky fellow he is, was like “I’m really happy for y’all of course you can leave. I love you my babies. My best friend and my sisterrrrrrr, I am the captain of this SHIP.” but was actually like “wait, no, no, no, not my Marcus. D-D-Did-Didyme I NEED him.” Think Sid the Sloth from ice age in the first movie when Sid really wants the baby. So this man is like...gonna have to do it to em and murder. He killed Didyme secretly (dunno how he pulled the secret part off- like i know how he did it but how did no one hear or see anything or even suspect anything IT WAS LITERAL FRIENDLY FIRE but we love the drama so continue.) Ironically enough she was very close with Aro and the two actually did love each other, Aro is just...murderous apparently, to the extent that even his sister isnt safe. And that’s it. That’s Didyme. Which im like...alright Smeyer i see you. I like this and expanded on this with my Didyme. i get the vibes that Didyme is the most innocent and kind of all the Volturi. Losing her meant losing the consciousness within the Volturi making them all the more ruthless because there was no one to say. “Guys, maybe lets rethink this? and quickly because i cant get Caius to put down the torch thats currently on fire.” Losing Didyme made Marcus mostly become passive and would rarely stop anything that happened. I often wonder if that provoked a lot of guilt for Marcus later on. (However thats a spoiler for something im currently writing...;) ) I also think of her as a major daydreamer and the most soft, gentle person anyone will ever meet. Like its difficult not to like her despite being in the Volturi, even the Romanians would have struggled if they met her. So in the long run...i hate nothing about Didyme, only find more and more love lmao.

Corin: So im going to be honest and tell you i have no idea what Corin would look like. I’ve got nothing and when i was younger i wasnt even sure if Corin was male or female. Like a lot of these names, i had never heard of the name ‘Corin’. I dont write for her as of yet because im still trying to figure her out. I think she’s quite quiet, she lets her gift do most of the work for her in keeping the wives, Chelsea and Caius when he doesnt get to go on a rampage, content. She was brought in also after Didyme died but Marcus refused her gift.That’s all i’ve got for her. Her gift is amazing, pretty underrated in my personal opinion since like Chelsea, she really helps keep the Volturi unified but other than that, I dont have much to say about her. :(

Afton: Another character i basically filled the blanks in for myself. So what we’re told is that he’s Chelsea’s mate and has the ability to disappear . Whilst thats a pretty cool trick...the volturi dont necessarily need it but they have to keep Chelsea happy and she demands that Afton stays so welcome to the family Afton! I also recently learned that if you hide behind Afton and he goes invisible infront of an opponent, you too will also be invisible. I figure that is until the opponent moves and basically changes their perspective but i could be wrong with that last part. That’s all we get so time for my unnecessary input! SO AFTON IS A TOTAL SWEETHEART. He’s very shy but polite. This is a complete opposite to his mate Chelsea. It’s actually what she liked about him. At first is was just be flirtatious to the shy vampire but when she actually got to know him... she fell hard. It was also Chelsea who had made the first move since Afton was so shy. Of course she’d never say so and Afton would never want to embarrass her so that was never really disclosed to anyone who wasn’t around at that time. She brings Afton out of his shell a lot and it wasn’t long before the two were mates. Chelsea is the light of his life. Hands down. He puts up with a lot for her and is happy to do so. She could ask anything of him and he’d do it and she doesn’t even need to use her gift. He buys are anything she wants almost instantly. He cant help but adore her passionate personality, like how hooked she can get on era’s such as the 1920′s, her love for jazz music and her ability to gush on and on about anything. The two had what the other lacked and that made them an excellent team. I love their relationship. I cant help it. However, as i said before Afton is very shy and tends to keep to himself. Sadly that, paired with Chelsea’s demand to keep him in the Volturi has left Afton a little bit outcasted. All the other permanent guards were wanted and considered important whilst Afton...not so much. Although that isn’t to say the other guards are mean to him or anything. They aren’t! (Except the twins who are...the twins.) Felix and Demetri tried to include him a lot but it was very difficult to break him out of his shell. That doesn’t mean to say they wont invite Afton when he’s around. Chelsea always appreciates their efforts. Afton is notably good friends with Santiago, who often preferred solitude as well.

(Guard to the left is who I imagine Afton is)

Chelsea: So supposedly Chelsea’s original name is Charmion? When i was younger i didnt really care much about her. I only really knew her gift and that she was the reason Afton was kept in the Volturi, since they were mates. From what im aware Chelsea basically wasnt in the movies/not identified. There wasnt much said about her in the books either. So since then i’ve kind of developed my own persona of Chelsea that could be completely inaccurate to canon but canon was my foundations with characters like these. She was always a red head in my eyes with ringlets, a copper kind of red head. I also pictured her to be small. However the newest addition to her character would have to be the mid-Atlantic accent. I blame Poppy Hill for this one. That character screamed Chelsea to me. She was very close to how i imagine Chelsea to be. So now Chelsea has an accent that i have no clue how she managed to maintain being in Italy so long and being born in Greece. LMAO. We’ll say she was very attached to that time. However, I think the time she joined the Volturi was actually very good for the story. She first came around just after Marcus had lost Didyme and Aro had her use her ability to keep Marcus in the coven. it’s really cool how she could really make or break the coven. Although, Aro was smart enough to not fully rely on her, using Corin’s ability on Chelsea to make sure she’d be happy and stay within the Volturi. Thats where the information on Chelsea really ends Over the years Chelsea has appeared in my writing and so beyond this point, Chelsea’s character is only my depiction. I figure Chelsea is a talker, like she can talk her way in and out of situations with ease. She enjoys being manipulated and even more so, being needed.Much like her gift, she gets under people’s skin- not in terms that she’s annoying but more so she can figure out people very well. Her mate is the complete opposite and so she often speaks on the behalf of them. Chelsea is very social and charismatic. She along with Heidi are the only two Volturi members who will be out and interacting with humans if necessary. Heidi for her ability but Chelsea purely for her social skills. She’s also the most interested in human culture. She loves the parties- the 1920′s being her favourite era in terms of fashion. She has no issue changing her name and has done so multiple times when the names run out of fashion.It’s like playing dress up! I’d actually love to write more about her. I’ve really grown to love her character, even if i filled in some blanks for myself. I think she and Afton’s relationship is one of the best, up there with Carlisle and Esme- despite the two being very different. It’s a part of their dynamic!

(I always imagined Chelsea to be a red head but Poppy Hill from THOHH is a very close depiction to Chelsea in my eyes)

Renata: A stressed little bean that lives on stress. I remember thinking when i was younger she was the big threat since she was Aro’s shield but now that im older i see...a stressed little five foot bean. I have no idea what she looks like but always imagine her dark hair tied in a tight bun, looking almost painful. Another who wears heels, like Heidi but she is very rigid just as she has been described. Her uncle is a bit of an ass considering he begged her to go with the Volturi so there wouldn’t be a threat. Dude, can you not just...hand over your niece? At least hesitate! Just like that, thanks to Chelsea, she’d give her life to protect Aro and...I have nothing else. Yes it does drive me mad that there are two named guards i know next to nothing about.

Santiago:So what’s known about Santiago is that he doesn’t actually have an ability. He’s just very good at battle techniques and fighting which is why he’s kept around. If they need fighters, they’re top three are Felix, Demetri and Santiago...in that order. Santiago is also much faster than a regular vampire (as shown in breaking dawn part 2- he caught up to Jacob and Renesmee quite fast despite the two having a running start and wolves supposedly being very fast- much like a vampire) That’s all we know of him so then i got in there and this is how I write Santiago. I gave him the background of coming from a superstitious family. Like he would be told tales of demons and witches growing up as well as things like voodoo. He knew an awful lot of urban legends and whilst he stopped believing in the bad luck his family taught him, he still held interest and couldn’t help the instinct of unease when witnessing such things as rituals. It’s ironic really. However Santiago always deems that humans have it all wrong. These forces are beyond human understanding and shouldn’t be played with. In that way, perhaps Santiago still has some belief in things such as superstition. He’s very secretive about it and would never clarify it for you. Santiago keeps to himself and can be quite standoffish. He can also be blunt even if it’s insulting- he doesn’t tend to care. Although he and Afton became quite good friends since the Afton was an outcast and Santiago didn’t enjoy large groups, or most people in general.

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demauryss · 4 years

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DO you do Fic recs!?!?!? I feel like i see fic recs from everybody on my dash cuz everyone wants to know what their fav writer is reading. I wanna know yourrrrs❤❤❤❤

agsahd thank you anon i do have a fic rec tag here but if you want to know some (or maybe lots) of my favourite stuff then i’d be happy to oblige!!!

(putting the list under the cut because it got long adfaasgd also featuring some old works )

first of all, a shout out to the queen @surrealsunday for blessing us with tempo and hollow edge (i mean would fic rec even be fic rec without including them??? also there’s a medical au in progress ADAHF)

take you to the flower shop by fkaps: florist! eliott, disaster lucas and a misunderstanding regarding someone getting married - need i say more??

perks of being an early bird by marveltimy: parks, elu and ouba. this one is just a big ball of sunshine and i enjoyed it so much

the moon song by @mayalecomte: otteli/urbex fic???communication??? the beautiful writing?? just?? seriously i have no words to describe how truly marvelous this fic is. just...give it a read and you won’t regret it

a measure of stars by @lepetitepeach : a pride and prejudice au with nat’s own turns and beautiful writing!! it’s sure to leave you satisfied and yearning all at once. it goes without saying that you should read all of nat’s amazing works because they all are phenomenal

illusion of bliss, there’s magic in all of this, and every single thing written by @lumierelovers : i love love love anna’s works they’re all so freaking pretty and her writing goddd like i wish i could write half as good as that asdadf

splash me pink, i keep it together, so i don’t fall apart, white picket fence by @bluronyourradar: listen you should read everything mtea has ever written because they’re all amazing just like that!! (these three are just some of my personal faves atm)

i’ve got the touch placebo, you call the shots, babe (i just wanna be yours) and it’s second part i’ll die to take care for you by @sawszall: these are some of caroline’s most recent works but i’ve read and loved everything she has written so far

everything is about you (to me) by @kritiquer: lucas is in love with eliott. he is in love with otteli’s art but without knowing they’re the same person. this fic!!! omg just so good and lovely (also kit has a soulmate au in progress and i really can’t wait to read it)

last dance by @livvyblxckthxrn: elu in a ballet, enemies to lovers andddd roommates au ??? literally the best thing! and the writing??? just amazing!! also i have just started reading seven minutes in heaven because i was waiting for it to finish and what i’ve read so far seems v promising!! the format is unique and the concept is amazing

i’ve been waiting here (i deserve this kiss) by @lifeisevak: the absolutely sweetest ‘sorting dvds’ fic you’d love!! and i’m talking lucas being a little shit and eliott not being able to resist him after when he dodged his moves like!!! also meg’s rainbow fluff drabbles deserve special mention ‘cause they were all so sweet and fluff and i loved reading them so much (i hope i included the right tag for them agasfdga)

flickers by @dcmaurys: a fake dating social media au!! fake dating is one of my favourite tropes and the way frankie does it is honestly so good and refreshing!! i love the way she incorporated eliott’s project into the fic and his posts just. have me crying on the floor every time

i’m just going to link @tawmlinsun ‘s writing page because i couldn’t pick just one of lauren’s works lol. from her elu drabbles to multi-chaptered fics, everything is worth a read (or in my case: several reads ahadgs)

wandering tides (wip) by @lallemanting: it’s a pirate au and i love sara’s take on it! lucas comes with a past he seems to be running away from and from what i’ve gathered, the whole deal with black rose somehow ties into it. an intriguing world has already been put forward and i can’t wait to see how it all plays out!!! and also for want of gold made me cry like the writing is sophisticated and beautiful and fuck!! the concept behind the soulmarks likebsdjfhf just give sara’s works a read and you won’t be disappointed

one call away by @demaury: elu neighbours and enemies to lovers au??? man this fic is so good!!! lucas is a snarky spikey assole and eliott’s just there to make sure he doesn’t kill himself by his own stupidity! and their banter ajdgad gold

lemonade by @pinkplanetaries: i’d be a fool not to rec this one. because fuck if this isn’t one of the best fics ever!!! like cor comes up with the best concepts and this one was just so good!! camboy!lucas and eliott as a dedicated fan was the sweetest and the tangiest thing ever agagsdfhgsd also please read her other works too if you haven’t because they all are *chef’s kiss*

les diamants sont eternels and a rose, by any other name by @flying-elliska: the former a lawyer/gangster(?) au and the latter a myth/boss-employee/bodyguard/sort of magical au. they’re both thrilling and sexy and so much fun to read. you get swept into this world created by ellie with numerous twists and turns to keep you on the edge of your seat like....fuck

things i forgot to tell you by @brieflygorgeouss: do i even need to say how beautiful this fic is?? friends-with-benefits is such an interesting concept and it’s done so well in this fic. and with joana’s amzing writing, it’s bound to give you all the feels there are

anything and everything written by @sandalwoodhusbands especially this kiss like real people do series. the first part was all the bit angsty and emotional and beautiful and ro has just posted the prequel to it and i can’t wait to get into it!!

also here’s some of the writers in the fandom i’ve enjoyed reading the works of: @mauuvelesbian @eliotts-eyes @jebentnietalleen @ayellowcurtain @briallenko @mecsurprenant @blanxkey @ottelis @raconxteur

#elu fic #elu fic rec #skam france #whew this was some work #i'm sorry if i missed anyone #but i hope you do know all of you are amazing and deserve all the appreciation #anon i hope this would suffice #will try to add onto it as we go on #thank you for this ask anon #anon #asks #skam france fic #the tag in on fire rn

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lululawrence · 4 years

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hi, you said you love tomlinshaw, so what’s your top 3 favourite tomlinshaw fics you’ve ever wrote and what’s your top 3 favourite tomlinshaw fics you’ve ever read?

ohhhhhh nonnie dear i love youuuuu haha! i sure do love tomlinshaw. my top three i’ve written is gonna be pretty easy for me just because i’ve not written too many tomlinshaw, but the reading is going to be HARD so let’s see if i can do this lol

my fav tomlinshaw i’ve written:

You Don't Care About Me (One More Night) - this is my pride and joy and honestly probably the fic i am most proud of period. ever. i love her so much and she is truly one of the absolute most self indulgent fics i’ve ever written. i just like so much about what i did with this one, i could go on for EVER about it hahaha but i won’t. promise. i won’t bore you like that lol

Can I Have Your Attention, Please? - this fic was a bit of an experiment for me lol i’d never written a fic that wasn’t larry and so i wasn’t sure if i would enjoy it or even be any good at it, but i wanted to try. this fic was the start of my tumble into rare pairs because i had SUCH FUN writing this one, and i quite like the story of it as well, so definitely another one of my favs

You're a Nightmare, I'm a Disaster - in this fic i had a lot of fun making nick an almost accidentally well known writer who goes by a pseudonym and i really enjoyed capitalizing on the chaotic gay energy that nick really gives off haha plus there was louis just constantly giving his opinions about his reading material and i just really loved these characters a lot.

my fav tomlinshaw i’ve read:

when the air ran out and we both started running wild by @bigbrotherlouis/ darlingjustdont - OT5 WEREWOLVES AND WEREWOLF HUNTER NICK!!!!! for real though this fic just draws you in and the world building! and the details! the relationships! plus there’s a feeling of betrayal and misunderstandings and an edge of secret relationship and GAH it’s just SO GOOD and complex and i LOVED IT SO VERY MUCH A LOT

Can't Forget You by @writsgrimmyblog / Writcraft - THE PAIN OF THIS FIC OMGGGGGG i’m a SUCKER for an amnesia fic, but the last thing grimmy wakes up and remembers is still flirting with louis and wanting to ask him out, but when he wakes up he learns that he and louis GOT TOGETHER AND THEN HAVE SINCE BROKEN UP AND HE DOESN’T REMEMBER IT!!!! omggggggg so anyway, the entire journey through all of that and trying to relearn what happened while healing and such is just.. oh gosh it tugs the heartstrings and i love every moment of that pain

We Used To Wait by @magicalrocketships / sunsetmog - LISTEN. SECRET RELATIONSHIP. CANON COMPLIANT. HOSPITALIZATION. imagine those three things combined eeeeeeee this fic is so so so great and painful and angsty (can you tell that’s something i really love? tomlinshaw does such a great job of giving me that lol) but for real, it’s so scary and you feel so so so much for nick because no one knows that they’re dating! and louis has been SERIOUSLY injured! but how is he meant to explain that to anyone?? oh man oh man oh man it’s just. it’s so fucking good. deep breath. i’m fine. i’m good. lol for real though one of my absolute fav fics EVER

loose lips sink ship all the damn time (not this time) by @mediawhorefics / MediaWhore - i know i know, you said my favorite three BUT I CAN’T LEAVE OFF ONE OF THESE FICS OKAY. like... gah the way that this fic is crafted and the way in which you learn about the information?? the way you read about them falling apart at the same time as reading about them coming back together again? your heart is torn apart and sewn back together again over and over and over. it is so ridiculously gorgeous and wonderful and incredible.

SO BASICALLY would you like me to forever go on about tomlinshaw and how much i love them as a ship? cause i really really REALLY could. lollll

#i didn't even mention the very first tomlinshaw fic i ever read #the one that started it all #i wanted to #but i'd already listed four instead of three so i stopped myself #lol #my fic rec #tomlinshaw #fic rec #damn i love fic so much #thank you for coming dear anon i love you a lot lol #Anonymous #asks #mine

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andypantsx3 · 4 months

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andie!! i am dropping by with some good music and new year wishes! 🎶🎉 thank you so much for being part of my 2023 🥹 you are so incredibly sweet and soooo cool omg like!!! i adore how organised you are!! and how creative you are!!!

as a year end pick, my favourite read from you is: lay low (take it slow) omg bsjbsj (tho i think when i get to the rest of your masterlist... i'll love everythign asfbasj) WAAH i just! love the way you write!! i go through em sooo fast 🥹

if i may ask!! 🥺 (pls feel free not to answer if uncomfy!!) how was 2023 for you? what’s a favourite thing (anything) you discovered this year? do you have any reflections from the past year? any resolutions for the next? 🥹

Hi Selly my beloved angel princess. 🥺 Happy New Year to you!! You have absolutely been such a bright spot in my 2023 and I can't thank you enough not only for how sweet you are to me but for everything you contribute making fandom a fun place. Not only are your fics incredible but you jump around leaving questions like little presents and I think you are magic. 🥺

2023 was pretty good! A wild ride with many ups and downs, but definitively better than 2022 lol. I discovered sooo many good things this year. I read more x reader fic this year than I ever have before and found some absolute standouts that I will be returning to again and again. I also found a new favorite pubbed fiction author Everina Maxwell (if you like gays smooching in space, I highly recommend lol), I made a zillion new fandom friends, and I got to spend a lot of time with the people I love!!

I think, reflecting on 2023, some of the biggest mistakes I have made come from comparing myself to other people, being impatient, and fearing misunderstanding. In 2024 I'd like to be so much more intentional about how I handle certain unexpected situations, and more conscientious of how self-doubt shapes my attitudes and interactions!! I try always to do my best, but I will try to do even better in the coming year!!

What about you?? Got any resolutions in 2024??

#ask andie

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kumoriyami-xiuzhen · 4 years

Text

Hakuoki SSL: Tell me! Secrets Q&A

Last post of the month! so I’ll once again end by asking you to please support me if you can either on ko-fi, through paypal or patreon for access to my blog post translations or just to support me. …. also let me know if you have any hakuoki drama cds that you’d be willing to share that are on my looking for list since i either do not have audio for those cds or do not have audio that i can share...

This is the thing that i left as ???? on my March update post... and the thing that i accidentally posted the title of back in may when i was planning out my queue (oops?).

I think I should start by saying that I translated this for amusement.... though I won't deny how this is a fascinating piece of reference for writing hahaha......

Unfortunately since this is only limited to the main six, I really wish I had some of Yamazaki’s responses to these....

Favourites by character order: Hijikata's answer to Q4, Saito's to Q5, Harada's to Q7 and Kazama's to Q7.

Only for references purposes. LMAO.

enjoy!

Hakuoki SSL: Tell me! Secrets Q&A

From 『B's-LOG別冊オトメイトマガジン vol.9』

Translation by KumoriYami

Q1: What is the first thing you wash when bathing [text can be interpreted as either bath or shower]?

Q2: Where would you want to go for a date?

Q3: At Hakuo Gakuen, who do you have the best relationship with?

Q4: Where do you want to go most now?

Q5: What words and actions/behaviours from a woman make you feel a rush of excitement/moves you ["feel a rush of excitement" is an idiom. can be also interpreted more literally as 'move your heart']/excite you the most?

Q6: What are your favourite school activities [roughly says: fond of school activities]?

Q7: What do you wear while sleeping?

Q8: What are your best and worst subjects?

Q9 What happened recently that made you happy?

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Hijikata Toshizou

A1: Hands should be washed first.

A2: This...... How about going to a Buddhist shine that has snow in its surroundings. We can recite poetry [either that or songs]....... No, I didn't say anything.

A3: Kondou-san.

A4: I don't know why, [but], no matter what happens, I want to see Hokkaido [says reckless/regardless of everything].

A5: Rather than saying affecting the heart, perhaps it might be better to say that [I'm] not good at dealing with a woman staring into my eyes without fear [or something like that...?].

A6: Although it might cause misunderstandings, that would naturally be writing exams [conducting exams to be written...?].

A7: I sleep in Western style pyjamas.

A8: The subject I am good at is classical literature, [and] I'm not good at chemistry.

A9: Probably when I met with that guy who listened to listened to me without getting tired.

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Okita Souji

A1: Hey, after learning about this, what do you plan on doing?

A2: Of course, it needs to be a place where you can go have fun and be happy. That's How about an amusement park, or something like that?

A3:……This question is very difficult to answer. Who knows.

A4: Now? During winter? Oh...... somewhere that isn't cold.

A5: Heheh...... you're probably just wanting to secretly watch me while thinking I haven't found anything out, and of how surprised I'll look when I do.

A6: Club activities.

A7: What will you be wearing? If you want to tell me, I'll tell you after.

A8: I'm actually not particularly good at anything, [but] I dislike classical literature the most.

A9: I saved quite a few pictures of someone recently.

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Saito Hajime

A1: Ah, probably the feet.

A2: Da-date!? Then...... a place to go together with a woman? For me/As far as I'm concerned, as long as we're together, it doesn't mater where we go.

A3: Well, when it concerns time spent on school activities, that would be Yamazaki.

A4: I don't know why [but] I look forward to winter, and would like to see snow as soon as possible....... I want to go to a place where I can see snow.

[Personally, i don't get why people like summer lol. I seriously hate summer. and the heat. Snow is soooo much better than the heat. i absolutely can't stand hot weather lol]

A5: Does this question have to be answered? Really...... then, when she shows/exposes her ear...... Ah.

A6: Probably school trips. It's nice to go learn and study new things in places you wouldn't normally go to.

A7: I personally feel that tight sweatshirts are very good.

A8: I'm good at classical literature, [but] I'm not good at math.

A9: When two equal partners people share their lives...... when you hold your other half's hand, you will immediately feel that you are not alone.

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Toudou Heisuke

A1: If taking a bath/shower....... of course it'd be the head, the head!

A2: Obviously going to the game centre! Eh...... ah, for a date? Then, is going to karaoke OK? [ok is ENG here]

A3: The person that I have the best relationship with, that'd be Souji since we're constantly together. However let me say beforehand, that this doesn't mean I have a good relationship with him.

A4: This period [Right now]...... it'd be nice to participate in a snow festival? I'd like to go somewhere where I can play with snow.

A5: This....... Ah....... Is it that just that I'm defenceless, or was I just relieved..... [to be able to show her my] sleeping face like that? [I think??????????????]

A6: The cultural festival!

A7: Sleeping in a skintight sweatshirt/sports jersey?

A8: Subject that I'm good at, I can fill in the blanks for modern language [i'm assuming this means a version of Japanese characters but since I don't feel like looking it up right now, I'm just going to leave that translation as is for now.] during an exam, but I'm completely unable to understand stuff in English.

A9: Er...... Well...... after being going into that room again after many years...... I found that the inside arrangement/layout had changed a lot so I was surprised. However she was really happy to let me in.

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Harada Sanosuke

A1: Hey. Do you know the common sense of bathing before taking before taking a shower?

A2: Date...... as long as it's the two of us together, it doesn't matter where we go. After she turns 20, there are many places that I'd like to take her to.

A3: Rather than saying that it's a good relationship, it might be accurate to call the relationship with Shinpachi and ill-fated one/ It's not so much a good relationship as a bad one between myself and Shinpachi.

A4: It's rarely winter, I want to go with a country with lots of snow. During the day I'll ski and take a sled/sleigh/bobsled, and in evenings I'll go soak in a spa/hot spring, while also enjoying other foreign culture.

A5: This....... [Seeing] the view of your back while [you're] in the cooking for me in the kitchen.

[the wording in this sentence reaaaaaaally threw me off since it kinda (more literally) reads as "in the kitchen as I cook from behind" ]

A6: All the activities conducted by the school, they're unbelievably exhausting. However, being able to watch how all the students grow and mature, is something to enjoy.

A7: Regardless of what is said...... pyjamas will ultimately become an obstruction. [ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) pfft...]

A8: This, since it's my specialty [referring to subject taught], I'm fast[? and?] good at using my body. Subsequently, I'm not good at every subject that requires lots of thinking.

A9: How can I say this, there's a line that absolutely must not be crossed when I'm together with her...... If I'm not resolute, this line would easily be crossed...... I've been thinking about this lately.

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Kazama Chikage

A1: Bathing......? The first thing to do, shouldn't that be immersing oneself in the bathtub?

A2: First tell me where you want to go. I will bring you there.

A3: This way of describing the relationship is very literal [??? well something like that. either that or something along the lines of: That is a good adjective that literally describes the relationship]. It goes without saying, that would naturally be my wife.

A4: Where my wife and I get married.

A.5 Hesitating while wanting to say something with beautiful and delicate eyes while gazing at my appearance, hahaha......

A6: Of course that would be student council [activities].

[it's either that or student assemblies depending on how the words after ‘student' are interpreted, since if they are translated as verbs instead of noun/adjectives, it can mean something to the effect of 'complete gathering of students'... which is also why im kinda leaning towards 'assemblies' though.]

A7: What is meant by this question? Isn't it common sense to sleep while naked?

A8: I'm an expert at every subject. No subject exists that I am not an expert in.

A9: Fufu....... This year I will surely be able to graduate. I've been waiting for so long...... waiting for far too long!

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this probably felt longer to translate than it actually did lol... too many questions and answers.... also i don’t know if this was reprinted in one of the ssl books. maybe when i’m bored i’ll mtl the jp to double check some of this lol.... or not.

#hakuoki #hakuouki #hakuoki ssl #Hakuoki Other Translation #may edit later

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shinygoku · 4 years

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Liar Revealed! A Bug’s Life Essay

A Bug’s Life is my favourite Pixar movie and thus, it turns out I have a lot of thoughts about it. In this case, what was originally my interpretation soley in response to points I’ve seen raised on YouTube and TV Tropes has spun off into this mega essay.... all focused on a single scene.

But hey, it works with one of the film’s main messages; that something big grows out of a small idea!

The scene is the most notorious in the movie, at least from what I’ve seen, and I’m inclined to agree it’s the weakest part of this giant clock. But why is it like that and how could it have been handled better?

As I’ve said, this is actually my favourite (albeit not what I consider their very best) of Pixar’s output, and I wouldn’t have been able to go into such depth without a huge amount of love for the finished product, flawed as it may be.

It’s also possible I’ll write a more generalised thing on what I love about the film in the future, but I won’t promise anything o7;; 🐜

The Lie is ...laid

Actually, I should talk about two scenes. First is where the Lie is established:

After the humourous mutual misunderstanding between the Circus Bugs and Flik, the former are quite horrified to discover they’re expected to fight the Grasshoppers off themselves instead of putting on a show. Ahh, that old classic~

But no, they want out and Flik, who has just been informed by them during the welcoming shindig, is understandably rattled and despairing over this addition to his list of failures. He says the fallout will not only brand him, but his hypothetical grandchildren as a Terrible Loser and even says he’s as good as dead as soon as the other ants find out. Owch.

Before things get too heavy, the focus shifts around until The Bird becomes the main immediate threat. The whole Bird scene leads the ants to become convinced the Circus Bugs are really amazing warriors and, as this is the first time in what could be years that they have a crowd cheering for them it’s the success and Flik’s later idea to make a Giant Mech in the shape of a Bird instead of planning any actual combat that convinces them to play along.

So, that’s the lie set up and solidified. Now for the eventual fallout:

During a fun party after the Bird has been built, an ominous force arrives... PT Flea, the Jerkass ringmaster who had fired the Circus Bugs. This local bug promptly ruins everything by literally shining a light on the Circus Bugs and their nature as such, and then Flik is accidentally outed as the Guy Who Thought Up The Bird.

The Liar Revealed Trope

I would link the TV Tropes article here, but as tungle doesn’t like external sites I’ll just quote the more relevant parts from it:

“Liar Revealed in the Internal Reveal of The Lie, the facade maintained by a protagonist which provides the primary dramatic tension for the plot. This usually sets up the third act where the protagonists are forced to deal with the consequences of the lie on top of any external threats.

There are a few usual ways this ends up. If the lie was for selfish reasons, the protagonist will doubtless face the wrath of those he lied to, but along the way end up having a change of conscience, and try to redeem themselves through good acts and An Aesop about "what really matters". If the lie was well-intentioned, the protagonist may still find that others turn their backs on him, but go on to carry through with what they said they'd do anyway, proving themselves a hero after all.

It's worth noting that this trope is particularly easy and common to misuse, either in the tendency of the protagonist to Maintain the Lie for reasons that make no sense except for dramatic tension or of the deceived to turn against the protagonist for the deception in spite of other considerations that should by all rights absolve him.”

And in the folder there’s a specific entry for this film:

A Bug's Life has Flik supposedly finding "warrior bugs" to save his colony after misconstruing a situation. When he realizes his mistake (that they're circus performers rather than trained warriors), he's forced to keep the lie going in order to not cause panic among the other ants. Once the colony finds out, it inevitably results in one of the most painfully Played Straight examples of this trope in animation history...

As you can see there, the dislike for this scene has seeped into the entry. Of course, TV Tropes is pretty informal and I like that, but it’s telling that this is a general perception.

Continue reading below the Cut! ✂

What I don’t like

So, I think my main issue with the scene boils down to... it’s very nebulous and unclear as to what’s so bad about Flik lying. Between the Council, the Queen and Atta, there seems to be a jumbled, confusing motive traffic jam that somehow results in what TV Tropes refers to the Liar Reveal Trope being played “Painfully Straight”.

But uhh, what’s the problem? Yes, Flik lied, but we know that wasn’t something he’d planned on doing, it was his attempt at damage control. The other ants don’t know that part, but still, what are they objecting to, specifically? That the Circus bugs are Circus bugs? That the Bird Plan was Flik’s? That.... lying is treated at an absolute moral failing regardless of the circumstances??

The council dudes are like: “OH WHAAAAT, the defence plan was by Clowns??” [No, it was Flik] “OH WHAAAT, we don’t have our mafia money prepared what if Hopper finds out we nearly sicced a fake bird on him!?”

The part about objecting to Clowns drafting the defence plans is actually the more reasonable explanation, but I guess they presumed warriors habitually made Decoy Bird plans instead of fighting themselves? There’s already a hole in their objections but it only gets worse.

The Queen is like: “Wow Flik evidently you’re a self serving prick. Anyway the best thing to do is pretend this never happened and no we’re not going to tell Hopper.”

Why the fuck would that happen? ‘Oh sorry Hopper we got sidetracked doing a ...thing... so we’re still picking your food no please don’t break my legs’

But also, why THE FUCK is this the plan? Some ruler you are, you old prune. ‘We have the bird all made and ready to go but oops the idea came from a DIRTY LIAR so we’re going to return to the doomed harvesting racket even though we’ve been set an outrageous amount and we can’t possibly hope to catch up and even if we had been picking the food the entire time it was established earlier on we won’t have time for our supplies on top of all that.’

Fucking.... astonishing lack of logic. YOU MORONS HAVE NOTHING LEFT TO LOSE, GO WITH THE BIRD! Flik himself says something to a similar effect lol

But noooooo, his arguably selfish lie [which is more Omitting the truth once he knew it, really] has forever doomed everything, apparently. Honestly it comes across more like they just hate Flik and see anything he invents as doomed to fail, so the second the truth emerges that he spearheaded the Mech Bird they dismiss it as a lost cause. Even though everyone worked together to build it, and Flik’s inventions weren’t the issue but him being awkward and clumsy. But seeing how Flik’s mere presence in his first scene seemed to drive the Council members into a quivering fury, it really does feel like their objections are from them refusing to give him a chance.

And then there’s Princess Atta. Hoo Boy.

In this scene, she comes off as being ridiculously vindictive, petty and hypocritical. This applies to the Council too, but it’s more galling coming from Atta as by now she’s realised that Flik gets a lot of flak [yay wordplay] from the others and she had resolved to give him more credit. BUT OOPS, that didn’t last!

She takes the Lying thing so personally, acting like he was cheating on her or something. “You lied to MeEeEee” well golly gee whiz, was there any particular reason why he would tell you the truth? Other than his rather obvious crush on you, that is? Cause that would still be a weird reason, seeing how the ‘lie’ was after he’d finally got a bit of decent treatment from the others, why would he wanna upset the apple cart?

He probably feared coming out and confessing to Atta [or anyone else] that they’d lose all faith in him and scrap a valid plan that was the only way out of the grasshopper racket mess. Which would be a bit silly and probably the result of someone with low self esteem and confidence issues overthinking the situation but it’s Exactly what actually happens!

It wasn’t a personal slight against you, Princess! To quote Helen Parr: THIS IS NOT! ABOUT! YOU!!

And wooow, you must be awfully chilly up there on your high horse, Miss “Lied to Flik to get rid of him earlier in the film”! Did you ever feel like fessing up? Like ‘hmm I’ve grown much fonder of this doofus, maybe I should be honest with him before engaging with some more light flirting’ ? Maybe if you had, he woulda been honest in return!

I don’t even see why she and the Council bothered lying about their Snipe Hunt ploy, seeing how now they act like he crossed a moral event horizon. Why even bother making a phoney baloney decoy idea to get him away, when they clearly dislike him enough to play the Brutally Honest card without fretting over his feelings. They coulda just ordered him to stay in a corner away from interfering but instead they’re willing to risk his life on a wild goose chase.

...And she then Banishes him! For what?? Lying? About what, the circus bugs or the bird plan? Both?? It really feels like her taking undue personal offence and the Council hating him and the Queen being old and senile.

So yeah, wow, this scene has what I think is the Unintended side effect of making me hate the stupid jerkface Ant colony as every named ant in it except for Dot fucking suck and throw Flik under a bus the second they deem him to be untrustworthy. In spite of, like, that the plan itself was solid and that the Circus Bugs have all been proven to be Good Eggs. They don’t give him a chance to explain and made their own bed to lie in, so I feel dark joy and satisfaction when the grasshoppers do arrive and kick them around some more.

Wow gee, if only you dumb ass ants had some sort of already made contraption to fall back on?

Why is it like this?

I can only make guesses here, be warned!

From what I’ve gathered of an older version of the story, mostly via Wikipedia, I kinda feel like the exposing would have fit that take better. In the beta version of the story, instead of Flik the lead would have been “Red”, who was a red ant and circus bug from the start. The first draft Circus lot woulda been out to scam the ants initially and I guess would have grown genuine fondness with time. The idea of an outsider flim flamming his way into the good books and later being exposed makes the overblown outrage a lot more understandable. But that’s my hypothesis for the direction they ultimately didn’t go in. Also look at how Red looks like a fuckboi here:

But in the final version, Red doesn’t exist! Flik is a part of the colony from the get go, but also apart from it cause no one likes him as, again, his ideas were good but poorly executed and he seemed to be a hindrance. But the ants should at least see that Flik is genuine in his attempts, that he’s trying his best and they should maybe cut him some slack.

The way the ants have their knickers in a twist doesn’t gel so well with the “Well meaning screwup” angle, especially compared to a possible “Opportunistic so-and-so who doesn’t have real attachments to the colony” route.

Also it may be worth noting up there where I put a TV Tropes excerpt, I bolded the relevant half of the run down, but it seems the other half applies much more to this first draft. Interesting...

So I don’t know, but I got the idea that the scene in the movie is basically a holdover from earlier that didn’t get sufficiently updated. The Liar Revealed Scene is the first thing I’d change if I were rewriting the script, and I might go back and change it again after other parts had been redone too, cause the story needs to flow from point A to point B etc. smoothly or else viewers will get annoyed and point it out in Youtube videos or overly long tumblr text posts.

How could it be fixed?

I’m not saying I’m sitting on the perfect idea of a rewrite. But the main thing is what I already touched on, the jarring disconnect between what happens and how the stupid ants respond.

Like, Atta’s sudden grabbing of the Jerkass and Idiot Balls in this scene. Wouldn’t it have been better if she was instead unsure and conflicted? She had lied to Flik earlier and, unlike the Council, was shown to actually realise Flik Has Feelings Too and apologised for the general lack of faith. She didn’t come clean about the Snipe Hunt Lie, so that could be weighing on her during this scene, maybe she would have been the only Council member to Not want to kick him out but felt pressured into it and hasn’t got into the groove of being the Future Queen enough to pull rank and talk them down from being hate filled twats. Maybe someone will mention the flirting that had been happening as muddying her judgement?

That’s my main idea, compare that with her barging in and taking undue personal offence and shooing him off. She’s supposed to feel like she’s doomed to fail too, so her facing a moral dilemma and falling on the wrong side of the fence could tie into that! (To be honest, her arc is kinda undercooked so hey, I’m killing two birds with one stone here!)

Flik being banished at all is a casualty of The Narrative, that he and the Circus Bugs have gotta go away temporarily for the finale to be cooler and more exciting. It’s a Necessary Weasel of writing and you’ll find them in every story ever made. Sometimes things have gotta happen cause Story Structure. The trick is having them more organic and concealed.

So yeah, have the Old Fogeys be in the wrong [which is so far unchanged] but also the majority of the ‘voting’. Make it difficult for Atta to choose between loyalty to the colony as a whole and her sense of duty versus trusting in Flik, who she now knows to always have his heart in the right place. She comes close to standing up for him and herself, but ultimately falters and gets pressured into the call made in the movie. She’s still ultimately responsible as leaders are, but in a much more sympathetic way.

Summation

This got way longer than I had initially imagined, and that’s even after I cut stuff in the editing process! Let’s quickly review the three main points I’m trying to make.

The Issue with the scene - A big song and dance is made over The Lie, but no reason why it’s such a terrible thing is offered. A perfectly sound plan is dismissed nonsensically.

Suspected reasoning for the writing - The tone matches a potential alternate story much better, where someone would have lied for self serving purposes instead of for the greater good.

A suggestion for a rewrite - Make it much more nuanced and fitting the character arcs. Give the characters a reason to react the way they do and have different responses per person. If the ants are going to drop the Bird plan, at least offer a more viable alternate route than going back to what wasn’t working before.

Does it really matter?

Well, I don’t expect a 22 year old film to suddenly get a rewrite, no. And I maintain that it’s a real gem which deserves much higher praise with the other Good Pixars instead of being so constantly overlooked.

Part of what spurred me to think about the scene and what I’d alter is seeing it referred to as ‘Kinda Bad’ in a youtube video that was talking about another Liar Reveal scene in another movie, and that is a bad take, but the point about how clunky this part is isn’t wrong. I don’t want people to dismiss the whole, beautiful image cause one section of it doesn’t vibe!

It doesn’t ruin the picture, but when people have something negative to say it’s this which is the magnet. And I’m kinda guilty of doing the same thing here, haha. But I wanted to really dissect and examine it, to figure out why it’s like that and to guess how simple it may be to rework. It’s bittersweet, but there ain’t such a thing as a perfect movie.

This has been fun for me to go into though, and it’s nice to get thoughts out from just swirling around inside my head, so even if barely anyone sees and makes it through this whole dissertation, I’m glad I wrote it out. It’s a funny way to derive enjoyment from the bumpy part of a beloved movie, but hey, I’ll take it~

#A Bug's Life #Liar Revealed Trope #Pixar #Disney Pixar #Disney #CutCat writes a very long essay

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botherkupo · 4 years

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lovesquare 👀

Anon, you are just asking me to gush for days here.

The lovesquare is something I never knew I needed in my life. I normally hate love triangles (like so, so much, and that’s not even getting into love squares), but a love square featuring the same two people who just don’t know it? SIGN ME UP!

The beauty of the ML lovesquare is all in the different dynamics. ( @chatnoirinette wrote a really good summary of the different dynamics here. I’m sure her post will be much more coherent than my following ramble, but you asked and so you shall receive lol.)

So what’s so interesting about two people interacting with each other through their double identities? Let’s break that down.

Ladrien

I call this the Mutual Blushy Ship. Ladybug doesn’t know Adrien has a big, fat crush on her, and he doesn’t know that she has a big, fat crush on him, but the fact remains they have big, fat crushes on each other. This makes every one of their interactions adorable magic. (The way they look at each other, all the litttle blushes. It’s so precious.)

I also like the fact that Ladybug tries to be “professional”, so she’s able to speak to him much more easily than she does as Marinette, but sometimes she still slips up. (Like the shower scene in Volpina. Her ‘strike a pose, vogue’ panic because she’s all ‘if you have to’ when he asks if he can put clothes on will forever make me gigglesnort.)

Adrien also adds an interesting element to this dynamic. He’s Chat Noir and her partner, so he’s a superhero as well and normally flirts and banters with her, but as Adrien he can’t do that. (Because 1, he tends to act in a much more exaggerated manner as Chat Noir since he doesn’t have Trashbriel breathing down his neck and so can let loose. 2, he knows he can’t give away his identity to her, so has to act differently regardless). It’s just an interesting thing because, for the most part, he’s much shyer and blushier around Ladybug than he’s ever been as Chat. I think the mask gives him a lot more confidence, especially to just bust out those love declarations. (Though there is no denying that Adrien is an over-romantic dork. You just have to look at how he stops to give her that rose in Desperada. Also the love poem. I would normally cringe at such things, but these two are too cute, so I can stomach it for them.)

Fav canon Ladrien moment: This is really tough, actually. I think it might have to be when she’s outside the car and looks in and realises it’s him, and they just loook at each other with such lovestruck awe. my heart.

Fanfic potential: I’m gonna admit that I don’t naturally lean to Ladrien when it comes to writing fics. It’s not because I don’t think they’re cute or have lots of potential -- they absolutely do, and I get super excited when I find a nice Ladrien story to read. But I personally prefer to write romance that doesn’t start with crushes on both sides. Still, Ladrien is a very cute side of the lovesquare and it makes me sad when people act as if it’s somehow lacking. I don’t think this is the case at all. In fact, if you’re really into mutual pining, this one is probably perfect. There are definite barriers there and lots of ways this ship can be taken on a ride of fun misunderstandings and shenanigans. (I may just challenge myself to write them as well.)

Marichat

I wrote a long post about why I love this dynamic here.

Ladynoir

Oddly, this is my least favourite side of the lovesquare (which isn’t saying much since I love all of them.) I dunno, it’s hard to explain. I really enjoy these two as partners and am absolutely here to see them grow as friends and a superhero duo. I think their banter is fun and I love the way they feed of each other’s energy. The soft moments they get to share are really beautiful as well. (That little scene at the end of Chat Blanc where she rests her head against his shoulder? I CRIED. JUST SO MANY FEEEEEEEEEELS.) They’re also just an absolute power couple. (The little smirks, the casual fist bumps when they know they just obliterated someone. I love these sassy, smug superheroes.)

But their dynamic is still pretty strained when it comes to romantic potential. Chat is in love with Ladybug. He makes no secret of this. Ladybug is not in love with him. She makes no secret of this. It feels like there is a definite wall there that will be hard to push through. Which brings me to:

Fanfic potential: I think part of the reason Ladynoir is my least fav of the lovesquare is because it has the most potential for angst, haha. They are definitely close, there is also genuine affection (and I would argue attraction) there on her part, but there is a lot keeping them apart. And yeah, you could argue that’s the same for all sides of the lovesquare, but this is the only one where they are both aware they’re superheroes with responsibilities -- the only one where we see outright rejections. It’s almost like the stakes are higher because there’s more to lose if things go wrong.

That said, I have read a lot of Ladynoir fics (and I seriously think this should be called the sin ship, because I stumble across waaaaaaaay more M-rated stuff for these two, especially with the whole ‘Ladybug finding comfort and satisfaction in him because Adrien won’t notice her’ trope lol. But I digress.) There is certainly still lots of potential there. Building on the friendship, having Ladybug notice him and appreciate him more to deepen her feelings. (Which I honestly think is what canon is going to do.) And then you have the endless ‘you just almost died, you jerk, and now I must kiss you” moments.

Fav Ladynoir moment: The underwater hug in Miracle Queen. It was truly beautiful and made me so emotional to see her let herself be vulnerable in front of him, and he just gives her that unwavering support and the comfort she needs (just like he did in Origins when she was full of doubt about whether she could be Ladybug, except in Miracle Queen it’s so much more meaningful after all they’ve been through.)

Adrienette

This was my fav side of the lovesquare for quite a while (Marichat has sneaked into first because of it’s fanon potential), but I still have a huge, huge soft spot for Adrienette because of how wonderful it is in canon. ML really delivers in terms of giving us some quality scenes for these two.

Yes, the imbalance is there because Marinette has this ridiculous, over-the-top crush on Adrien (and he has no idea and thinks She’s Just a Friend), but omgggg do they get all the best moments. The umbrella scene? Pure perfection. Words cannot explain how happy I am that Marinette did not start to like Adrien because of his looks or his fame; it’s because he was kind, thoughful, showed her a bit of his vulnerability when he explained “it’s all a bit new to him” (not to mention gave her the sweetest smile when he handed her that umbrella). It’s just so pure and adorable.

Then we have the lucky charms. (i am so freaking soft for the lucky charms, especially that he took the time to make her one for her birthday in return.)

The dance scene in Despair Bear (how he just rolls with it because he doesn’t mind being close to her, and how adorably blushy and happy she is.)

STARTRAIN SLEEPY CUDDLES!

THE WHOLE GORIZILLA EPISODE

I can’t. They’re so cute and soft.

But also the awkwardness. I know people hated on Puppeteer 2, but I actually loved that statue scene. Yeah, Marinette did something pretty embarrassing, but they talked it out! DO YOU KNOW HOW AMAZING THAT IS? Also, Adrien agressively trying to be a Good Friend and make her laugh was very cute, even if it didn’t work out how he wanted.

I know I’m totally rambling here, but I just have so many feelings for these two. They care for each other so much and it always shows.

Fav Adrienette moment: aside from the umbrella scene, I really love when he teases her about the photographs in Troublemaker. (Yeah, I know, the scene where he’s letting his inner Chat shine, ahaha.) But seriously, it’s just a fun little scene.

Fanfic potential: A+ stuff right here. I can easily see Adrienette becoming a couple because Marinette is head over heels for him and I think Adrien is in love with her, he just hasn’t pieced together that’s what he feels. (Something Chat Blanc confirmed.) I also feel he’s more likely to try move on from Ladybug (since she rejects him) than marinette is when it comes to her feelings with Adrien (since the universe never even lets her confess to him, poor thing). Which is all to say there are lots of ways you can take their relationship without having to delve into too much angst (a bonus for me.)

Conclusion

I’m running out of steam, so gonna wrap this up. Basically, the lovesquare is a wonderful thing and while I do love how each dynamic works differently, what I really love is how they all interconnect to bring these two together. Each lays a new foundation, a new layer of development. The more these two characters can interact, the more the walls are broken down to let them see beyond masks and civilian names to have that ‘it’s always been you’ moment. Plus, it’s kind of sweet that they can fall in love with each other twice through their double identities.

So yes, I love the lovesquare. These two really were made for each other and I’m living for the slowburn development we’re getting canonically. (Along with all the wonderful fanfics and fanart.)

#ml spoilers #ml lovesquare #marichat #ladynoir #ladrien #adrienette #miraculous ladybug #ml sugar

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