#mentally ill on main
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Imagine wonka actually did get the kids killed during the factory (Charlie included but more like he got killed by the knids in Charlie and the great glass elevator) so their spirits constantly make his life somewhat of a nightmare and they all have different ways of doing it but most of which is messing with him directly, except for Charlie, Charlie just sorta stands there in his peripheral vision, he Dosent move, he Dosent speak, he Dosent even intervene with anything but he’s there, a subtle and constant reminder of what he’s done, and it is torture for wonka because he is constantly waiting for Charlie to do something in those moments, when he doesn’t do that he leaves small, meaningless messages that still will get under his skin (often times he finds one’s that say “don’t the stars look pretty tonight?”) and wonka hates it, he gets rid of the messages immediately but no matter what he does they will never leave his mind
#catcf#catcf 2005#catcf musical#charlie and the chocolate factory#wwatcf#catcf broadway#willy wonka and the chocolate factory#charlie bucket#mike teavee#veruca salt#augustus gloop#violet beauregarde#Willy wonka#being a little fucked up on main sorry guys#I just like the idea of Charlie being a little creepy sometimes#he deserves to be a little odd sometimes#the mental torture from Charlie + anything from the other kids would drive him even more off the cliff#mentally ill on main
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I'm so curious to see if he'll remember my birthday tomorrow
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tbh my hopes aren't high
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Can't tell if nauseous from anxiety or food 🤔 The chest pain indicates anxiety. Pretty sure it's a both moment.
Also! I'm going to be mentally ill on main for a bit. Please ignore the next 72 hours minimum. Ya'll know how it goes 'round here. If you don't, uh...surprise? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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I dont usually pick favorite songs from any one artist because that's so difficult to do but actually I think suicide season by bring me the horizon might be my favorite song of theirs
#mentally ill on main#that should be a tag actually#bmth has always been a favorite band#since i was like 12#comfort band#miles rambles
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"I just wish you would talk to me"
You caught me self harming three separate times over the course of five years and you didn't get me a therapist until I threatened to hurt someone else - on top of that you actually flicked my self harm scars when i wore shorts to point them out and ask me what they were when you knew full well, talked about how sad it was that i was "mutilating" myself in the summer when I would wear swimsuits because you could see my HEALED SCARS (was a great pick me up for a pre transitions trans person with an eating disorder), why the fuck would I EVER talk to you about anything personal again?
#Also trauma dumped about your dad being an abusive alcoholic to me#when i was 14 years old#the one time I told you I was depressed. Then I had to comfort YOU instead of continue to talk about my mental health and getting treatment#you piece of fucking garbage. Not opening up to you or your husband is a conscious choice i make every day.#self harm talk tw#mentally ill on main#ed tw
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fun fact about me is that I don't really have a personality, I just mimic stuff I like. So in college, I was like "I love daredevil and I will become daredevil" so I got a job at a law firm and did well in school so that maybe I could go to law school and help people so I can be Matt.
Then, I was like "I'm bored with Daredevil, I will become Hilda from Fire Emblem" and I became pink bimbo. No thoughts, just sexy.
Now I really like MK and thinking(tm) all the time
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im sipin water and watching as my mental state degrades as it always does in the evening
i never really did finish that mental breakdown i had last night, did i?
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anyone else ever feel like they're a bystander in their own life
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lead balloon (the tumblr post that saved me)
if this comic resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you donated to this palestinian family's escape fund.
--
no creative notes because this isn't that kind of comic.
I know I don’t owe any of you anything but I still felt compelled to write about my long term absence. And I feel far enough away from the dangerous spot I was in to be able to make this comic. I have a therapist now, and she agreed that making this could be a very cathartic gesture, and the start of properly leaving these thoughts behind me. I am still, at seemingly random times, blindsided by fleeting desires to kill myself. They’re always passing urges, but it’s disarming, and uncomfortable. I worry sometimes that my brain’s spent so long thinking only about suicide that it’s forgotten how to think about anything else. Like, now that I've opened that door for myself, I'll never be able to fully shut it again. But I’m trying my best to encourage my mind in other directions. We'll see how that goes.
I am still donating all proceeds from my store to Palestinian causes. So far, I've donated over $15K, not including donations coming from my own pocket or the fundraising streams which jointly raised around $10K. In the time since I made my initial post about where this money would be going, the focus has shifted from aid organisations to directly donating to escape funds.
If you'd like to do the same, you can look at Operation Olive Branch, which hosts hundreds of Palestinian escape funds or donate to Safebow, which has helped facilitate the safe crossing and securing of important medical procedures for over 150 at-risk palestinians since the beginning of the genocide.
#cw: suicidal ideation#cw: suicide#cw: self harm#cw: mental health#cw: depression#i made the balloon the main representation of my self destructive urges for a reason but im not going to explain it#i tried to keep a lot of the details in this vague#it would be my worst nightmare if this comic encouraged someone to hurt themselves#so. please dont#for a long time even the thought of making this comic felt so insipid and narcissistic#with the state of the world as it is#having the only threat to your life be yourself felt so privileged and trite and shameful#but doing this comic made me sit down and process things in full#and im just. very grateful i didn't give in to my thoughts back when i sincerely felt i'd be more useful to the world dead#i also feel the need to say that this wont represent everyone's battle with mental illness. its unfortunately different for all of us#there is no fix-all#and im afraid this might be one of those comics that either resonates a lot or misses the target by a mile#i made it for myself foremost. and now that its done im glad i did it#thank you for reading#and please stay alive#stillindigo art#stillindigo comics
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what was the camp version
Making my way downhill Walking fast
Faces pass And I’m funbound
*horrible clapping*
somethin somethin I forgor to the dinning halllllll
*horrible clapping*
And I want you, and I need you
And now I wonnderrrr
If we could have a horseshoe clue
And could we get those club points too
Ms ______ pleaaasee give us a horseshoe clue
Thaaank you
For context there was like this hidden horseshoe and whoever found it got a lot of club points and we had to sing this song to get a clue for where the horseshoe was
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lmao you "see my posting and are worried about me"
but don't ever actually check on me
got it 👍
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I am going insane about these stoats
(my insta is @trisideseye and that's where I mostly post art. I'm purely posting here bc @quiddie is active on here and I need aabria to know, personally ,how fucked up I am about these stoats)
#burrows end#burrows end spoilers#burrows end tula#tula burrows end#brennan lee mulligan#aabria iyengar#i. abandoned tumblr. i am trying to not use tumblr for any more than following people. i used to post here but i gave up bc i got annoyed#im in physical pain. every ounce of me doesnt want to post my cool art on fuckung tumblr.#tumblr CANNOT be my main social again. I need to give my socials to EMPLOYERS. i want to make art for a JOB#but there are more dimension 20 bitches on tumblr than insta bc its the mentally ill platform#and i need. peiple to understand how fycked up i am abt this stoat mom.#im insane. im insane. im insane. im biting this piece of media im the jugular like i myself am a stoat#and i cant SAY that on instagram the EMPLOYERS will have my ass!!!!!!#anyways.#dimension 20
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I'm so fucking physiologically stressed by the sight of a full email inbox it's pathetic
I stared down the barrel of a gun many times as a young child, why is 200+ unread emails able to unseat me
#my dog died so i flew home for a week and dropped so many balls its insabe#im fuckin#so avoidant rn!#blog#mentally ill on main
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very negative under the cut
just thinking about going back to work is making me borderline suicidal
i don't have to go to work tomorrow because i haven't gotten the job yet but my brain seems to be reacting to the idea of it just as viscerally as if it were actually going to happen
just trying to get into that 40hr work week mindset has made me so fucking depressed that i want to do nothing but sleep 24/7 - i'm on the verge of tears right now
everyone is telling me it's worth it but i feel like i'm going to be sacrificing my entire life and there will be nothing left to enjoy, what little free time i have will be riddled with crying and panic attacks knowing that the free time will be gone so quickly
i have more but....not right now...
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Feeling very normal listening to murder song by Aurora
#specifically the acoustic version#anyway#mentally ill on main#specifically taking 'he didnt mean to do no harm' in a way it probably isnt mean to come across#miles rambles
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