#me: he goes quietly
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that daniel retirement au but like also loml by taylor swift where the love of his life was f1 until it turned into the loss of his life (because max will crawl through the screen and yell at me if i made him the loss of daniel’s life… even if the lyrics “the coward claimed he was a lion/i’m combing through the braids of lies/i’ll never leave/never mind” is very maxiel coded but i’ll be quiet no one needs to know me linking the ttpd songs to maxiel) and instead we’ll just say the lyrics “it was legendary/it was momentary/it was unnecessary, should’ve let it stay buried/oh what a valiant roar, what a bland goodbye” was the inspiration
Daniel finds Max sitting in the grandstand opposite the podium. He’s pretty sure there were a few straggling fans still sitting there, whether or not Max scared them away or promised them something to get the grandstand cleared out, he’s not sure.
He smiles when he notices Daniel walking through the seats, patting the one on his left and all Daniel can think is how wonderful and lovely Max has been through all this. If it was the other way around Daniel couldn’t promise he’d handle it the same.
Maybe it was a good thing it happened to him and not Max.
“Daniel? Are you okay?” Max notices, because he’s Max.
He plops down on the seat next to him and tangles their ankles together, needing something to stop him from floating high above the grandstand. “Yeah, Maxy. Just thinking. I’m okay.”
Max looks over and searches his face for any sign of lies and he must cover it well enough because he nods once, satisfied. His eyes never leave Daniel’s face, and that’s one thing that hasn’t changed over the years.
It’s always been: Walk in a room. Look for Max. Find that he’s already looking back, even if he shouldn’t be. Max has always been stupidly brave when it comes to them, so he tells himself he can be brave too when he reaches over and slides their hands together. Their fingers slot easily together, as they’ve done a million times over and he wants it for a million more.
“Daniel,” Max whispers quietly, looking down where their hands are linked together. He knows what he’s saying, what he’s asking. That once it’s out, it’s out.
Are you sure?, conveyed through the squeeze of a hand.
“I don’t care anymore,” Daniel laughs wetly, surprising himself. He hadn’t realise he was tearing up. “I’ve already given so much. I’m not going to let them take this away too.”
Max reaches over to brush the tears off his face, running his fingers lightly over cheekbones, trailing down to his jaw. It’s intimate, romantic, deliberate—there’s no denying the existence of a relationship when the photos come out. He hasn’t looked at the pitlane, but he knows that the photographers are there.
The photos are probably beautiful too.
But it’s not theirs.
He also knows there’s probably a couple of people from their comms team who are staring them down, but he finds that he doesn’t give a fuck anymore. He’s played his role, he’s done his part, he stopped being a F1 driver the second he got out of the car. He should be allowed to have this—they both should be allowed to have this.
Max runs his thumb over Daniel’s jaw for a couple seconds more before leaning down and kissing his forehead. He smiles, small and soft before Daniel shuffles down on the seat, leaning his head in the crook between Max’s neck and shoulder. They sit like that for a couple minutes, watching the pitlane get quieter and quieter as people start to leave.
“I love you,” he whispers, tilting his head up to meet Max’s gaze. “Thank you for doing this with me.”
Max’s gaze softens, a small smile creeping onto his lips. “Of course, Daniel.” He knocks their legs together and mumbles into his hair, “Always I said we would be together, no?”
He does know, all the way back in the beginning of the year where Daniel wanted nothing more than to melt into the sheets of the bed after another disastrous race, another race where the noise had grown louder, and Max had pulled him up and held him until he resumed some semblance of a person. How he reassured him that it was okay to let go of something he loved when it started to cause damage he wasn’t able to repair.
“I love you,” he whispers again, because he doesn’t say it enough for Max to love him the amount he does. He thinks if they chopped up every single atom in his body and rearranged it he would still end up loving Max. They’ve intertwined and weaved their way into each other's lives before they even realised what they meant to each other.
“I love you too, Daniel.” Max pulls where his hand has been on Max’s thigh and kisses the back of it, three times in quick succession before resting it back where it was. “I’m proud of you. It will be okay now.”
And when Max says it so earnestly, Daniel finds he starts to believe it too. If Max believed, Daniel would too.
They both watch as they close the shutter doors of his garage.
He hopes he’ll be able to visit one day and not be so angry about it anymore. One day where he’s not angry about his own career, not angry about the people or events that drove him down the road he thought wouldn’t appear so soon.
One day where he’s not so angry that the sport he loved so much stopped learning how to love him back.
(But that’s for the future.)
Right now he’s sitting in a grandstand with Max, who holds him with all the love in the world, like he’s the only thing that matters in the universe.
And he’ll go.
Quietly.
(bonus)
[Photo: Taken from a top down view; Max and Daniel’s ankles and feet tangled together, resting on the back of the plastic grandstand seats. His right hand is tangled in Max’s left, the ‘3’ tattoo on pinky is barely visible, their hands are resting on Max’s thigh.]
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tengreenstopsigns I’M GOING TO BE SO INSUFFERABLE
8 December
#this is my offering to the race gods may both of the husbands do wonderful may daniel score some doints may max win etc#maxiel#five writes#daniel retirement au#me: he goes quietly#also me: he also comes out so not all that quiet but you can pretend the bonus doesn’t exist
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the reveal that Laios learned to see ghosts and why he kept quiet for so long...
oh, you mean like. what you saw happening to Falin throughout her whole childhood? Even though you stuck to her side and encouraged her into not hating her own powers? Even though you accepted her relationship with ghosts as benign and trusts her to give you their message?
(and no, there's NO dunking on Laios here... he saw this happening in his village and he hated it. but still,) well well if it isn't something he sees as worthy in his sister yet in him is just another one for the list of "offputting things people see in Laios"
#dungeon meshi#not even getting into his relationship with chil and how he just goes 'yes sir' whenever chilchuck scolds him+the consequence is this dksgd#laios and his mediating coworker (the other dad)#this also goes to show he's used to discomfort. all this time he was thinking he was /going crazy/#reminds me of how everyone was groaning at marcille's healing while he lost A FUCKING LEG and just quietly scratched it until falin healed#btw this is open for discussion. I haven't seen yet comments on this scene#dungeon meshi spoilers#if you're an anime only that is
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btw btw i think gallifrey has incredibly rich literary traditions. i think many of their stories are epic-length because time lords just have so fucking long to write their life's work. and i think courtly romance is a wildly popular genre for similar reasons to why it was popular in medieval europe, because it features an intensity of emotion that doesn't reflect their controlled and appearance-focused daily lives
#tell me they don't have a famous 50000-year-old 10000-page cycle about a soldier in the eternal war who's down so bad for his wife#that he rends apart spacetime and goes mad and is healed on a backwater planet and regains his memories and starts a civil war or whatever#the opera about it is twelve hours long and it's polite to cry quietly at three predetermined plot points
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literally so fucking depressing they moved the egg beds like what the fuck ever man. badboyhalo can’t even sing to them anymore
#crit#neg#he can’t even quietly go ‘excuse me sorry kids’ everytime he goes in their room bc he doesn’t wanna ‘wake them up’
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Byler and Jancy running into each other late at night in the Byers kitchen like
#but the idea that Mike accidentally fell asleep and needs to go home and then Nancy pops out of nowhere is very funny to me#Nancy and Jonathan are home for break or something#el sitting quietly in the kitchen eating ice cream just watching#Jonathan is still asleep initially but wakes up because Nancy isnt there and he goes looking for her#he and Nancy look at mike and will and are just like carry on#stranger things#jonathan byers#jancy#nancy wheeler#will byers#mike wheeler#byler#i should've used s2 jancys recreation of this meme
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why tf are patrick j adams and troian bellisario so fucking cute and domestic and amazing and where can I get someone who treats me like treat each other
#seeing the buzzfeed relationship test thing fuck they are so so like that's what i what from. marriage#friendship domestic banter completing each other's sentences and just casual intimacy#whats are your eye colours troian goes his is a beautiful glacier blues and he quietly says you are my brown eyed girl#MY BROWN EYED GIRL#FUCK ME AND WHO#patrick j adams#troian bellisario
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i'm going to SCREAM
#tm#you don't get how UNHINGED this makes me it's SO#like he's been out all day trying to track down this missing kid (as part of her case too; to give her another avenue against volker)#and they have their little catch up and at first he's concerned (she's been at this all day and now into the night too#and he GETS it - in a way maybe other people wouldn't - but he doesn't want her to burn herself out; he wants her to be careful#maybe he's about to tell her a version of 'get some sleep')#but then she talks about amanda and it makes me NUTS because she does NOT ask for his help#she doesn't ask him to stay; to read the files with her; to 'burn the midnight oil' with her#she's just...stating her case; explaining why this means so much to her; and he listens; he takes it in; and he makes the choice to help#to sit in this with her and to help her work through it#and i just -- neither of them will ask the other for help (yes i know she did at the end of the last episode the context is different ok)#but they're both so quietly (and sometimes not so quietly) desperate to help each other it makes me sick#it's so interesting to see how they deal with this as the show goes on....idk how to explain it but like#when jane needs help he closes himself off; he keeps secrets and he schemes and he lies ('let me help you' 'you're sweet')#because he's trying to keep the people he cares about - the people he never planned on caring about as much as he does - safe#even as he shares more with lisbon (and sometimes the rest of the team) he still doesn't share everything#because that puts them at risk#and that's what lisbon used to do to - in the earlier seasons she put up walls when she felt vulnerable; and she still does in some cases#but with this case especially she's much more accepting of help - she relies on her team (not that she doesn't usually)#and she's practically an open book to jane - in this scene most of all - she lets herself be more vulnerable#(and open to suggestions/ideas she might otherwise scoff at or reject)#idk idk it's very interesting but this scene makes me so wacky there's something so soft and tender and understanding about it#the way there's no spoken acknowledgement - no 'i'll help' or 'thank you' - just the silent understanding that they're in this together#because they're partners#(also the way he picks at the rest of her food - the 'done with this?' the only thing they say - and the framing through the window#is still somehow very domestic it's like my perfect scene)#spinning my wheels hard i'm not thinking clearly i just love everything about it
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i do think a lot about the master & the doctor both deliberately seeking out other regenerations of each other than whoever they’re mostly interacting with. especially when they just want a chat, a moment’s truce, something that could be called comfort if they dared to put it into words. easier to do those things when, well, they’re still enemies, but the hurts are farther apart in time. ‘i’m your future, you’re my past, we’re both still hurting each other where we come from, but that’s a different me and a different you, and tonight, can’t we just play a game or share a bed for old time’s sake?’ you know?
#and its very much not a secret thing obviously. theyre both very aware theyre doing it. theyre crossing up their timelines like crazy.#anyway this idea brought to you by me reading a summary of a fic where thirteen goes back in time and fucks simm!master aldjfkgjks#which is. a little off topic from what im going for here. but yeah also that they do jump around the timelines to have sex.#but something about that fic idea specifically intrigued me because like. there’s that whole year where the master is just in one place#playing the part of harold saxon. he’s not going anywhere.#and like what if versions of the doctor just showed up. to bug him. to yell at him. to lay side by side on the floor quietly for as long as#they can both manage to stand it. and obviously to have hate sex on his desk.#i mean what kind of angsty fuckery would that dredge up right? to be able to visit the master before he even dies in their arms in his#timeline. and its not about stopping it or anything. just about the fact that he’s there. he’s not going anywhere.#idk. something to think about i guess.
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Trick or treat!
finishing up some of these while I am on my last plane of the day, mother FUCKER I am tired
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May is at the stage of jet lag where everything just hurts. The previous three stages - denial, euphoria, bargaining - have ended and she still has three hours left on her third flight.
"I miss my mom," she moans into her hands.
One seat away from her, on the aisle seat, her travel companion looks up from his book. "... Do I want to know?" Drew asks. It's not fair. His jet lag stage seems stuck at stoically inconvenienced.
"She used to brush my hair when I couldn't sleep. It just always made me feel nice and tingly."
"Eloquently put."
"Eat dirt."
Drew huffs and turns another page. May goes back to staring out the window at the endless grey clouds. Flying in an airplane sucks. It sucks!
A tap on her shoulder makes her whip around. "What's who's," she yips, too tired for coherency.
Drew pats his lap. "Here. Lay down."
May narrows her eyes. "Nine hours ago, I asked to do that and you said I'd drool and ruin your slacks."
"Nice hours ago, I felt like a person." Drew swallows and won't look her in the eyes. "Come here."
She flips up the arm rests between them, does her valiant best to fold up her thick legs and long torso into two seats and probably headbutts Drew in the stomach twice but eventually she's settled, staring up at him in the corner of one eye.
"Hi," she says.
"Hi," he replies, still not looking at her. His hand falls onto the crown of her head and his fingertips start to work gentle circles into her scalp. "This help?"
In response, she moans. Drew gently swats her on the shoulder. "Don't make a scene," he hisses.
"Okay, okay."
Despite his complaints, he resumes his gentle touch and May feels herself melting like chocolate in a child's pocket. "You're amazing," she hums.
"So are you," he replies, his tone unusually honest.
May wraps an arm around his shin and hugs him closer. "Tell me that the next time I beat your ass at a Contest."
#trick or treat writing game#saro's writing#Contestshipping#they're not dating but they might as well be TBH#endlessly writing Drew as quietly desperately in love while May just goes 'wow he's nice. a shame he isn't into me'
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I know this has been ragged on a million times but I gotta
#also like. the patriars are just?? there???#they see a grimy travelworn group of adventurers crash the archduke's coronation#and instead of kicking them out he goes 'oh heyyyyy!! ☺️☺️☺️ long time no see~ 🥰 let me update you on my - sorry - *our* evil plan!! 🤭🤭“#and openly reveals one of the adventurers as a fucking bhaalspawn?!#he's not speaking quietly or anything#there's a very large tiefling who is on fire and getting angrier by the second so clearly SOMETHING is up#the bhaalspawn in question looks fucking pissed#did they just want the tea or#i guess it doesnt really matter what they do b/c none of that conversation leaves that room#so i think they're all just too psyched for the surprise soap opera to think about what they're hearing all the way through#anyway. i wish the game had different reactions if you've already told the party that youre a bhaalspawn#wyll gave corentin the same exact speech twice which. fair. they probably needed to hear it#but still#shadowheart's the only one who didnt react again iirc but i might have just been reeling too much from karlach's to remember it#bg3#digital art#my art#bg3 spoilers#bg3 act 3 spoilers#corentin#bg3 wyll#bg3 karlach#bg3 shadowheart#bg3 gortash#bg3 durge#dark urge#baldurs gate 3#bg3 tav#sketch#the prodigal saer
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can't decide which i want more:
feral-era Hunter (trying to find Omega) with a full grown beard, in a "let myself go, don't care what i look like" long haired sexy caveman kinda way,
or wait until after he's reunited and settled down happily ever after with Omega for a true Dad beard
(bit'a both??? yeah maybe both lmao)
#OH MY GOD HE GROWS HIS BEARD AND HAIR IN HIS FERAL ERA AND THEN HE FINDS CROSSHAIR WHO JUST#FREEZES COMPLETELY AND QUIETLY GOES ''mayday?''#UNTIL HE REALIZES HALF FACE TATOO AND BANDANA#FUCK IT THERE'S NO BANDANA JUST A MAYDAY-LOOKALIKE FERAL HUNTER WHO'S COME TO RESCUE CROSSHAIR#the bad batch#hunter#star wars#DISNEY ITS' NOT TOO LATE TO HIRE ME AS A WRITER FOR SEASON 3
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i don't have the bandwith to write a sentinel/guide AU for horrible exorcists
but
i would Enjoy reading the heck out of one
#something beautiful and elaborate and like multichapter and ahhh#idk idk...akitania wrote a tmblr fic a while back where soulmates can feel each other injuries and matoba knew when natori was hurt...#it was so good. so yummy#emotional linked telepathy!!! it would give them worse problems but also fun problems#natori out there trying to ignore the insane Yearning vibes from matoba seiji when seiji is being snipy at him like#natori: i do Not see it or Understand it what does he want from me??????#matoba: goes (quietly) Crazier#LKSDJLFKSJD lies down#horrible exorcists
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“I’ve been alone, for so long! Here, on that bridge... I was the only one who could do it! I was the only one! And now I have to live with that forever.”
I know it kind of sounds like two sentences/topics mashed into one (the way he flows from “I’ve been here in the Ever After for so long” straight into “What happened on the bridge scarred me”) and I’m sure it’s meant like that too
But it also sounds like Jaune is saying “I’ve been on that bridge alone, mentally, for so long. The memory has never left me, what I’ve done haunts me, and after all these years, it feels like I’m still there.”
I think it’s amazing the way this line flows, the way it is voiced like that, in such a way that it both sounds like two topics squished together AND a singular memory of an action that can’t be undone, that will stick with him forever to the point where he has never really left that memory
#honestly miles' voice acting is so amazing#the way jaune goes from frustrated at being stuck (mentally and physically) to quietly thinking about the bridge#and suddenly BURSTING with emotion and panic and desperation#like he's pleading his case - trying to convince them (as well as himself)#and then starts crying quietly#and that all happens in under what? 20 seconds-ish?#fuck me its so good#rwby#rwby v9#rwby v9 spoilers#rwby spoilers#jaune arc#mettys posts#metty posts
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i do genuinely think s7 is decent but even if it wasn’t it’d be like crack to me considering it’s an entire season essentially centred around sam’s trauma. it’s the closest we ever get to the show properly genuinely acknowledging the things it puts him through. which is ironic considering it’s also before many many other things he goes through!
#s7 could literally just have like the first couple episodes and repo man maybe born again identity#and i’d be like Omg this is my favourite :)#oh i also really like amy pond ep. dean killing her is awful and the arc goes nowhere but i don’t care about that part it’s the childhood#sam content for me#like sure yes. for at least half the season they don’t deal with it at all and it’s in the back burner#sam is just quietly hallucinating offscreen while dean does whatever the fuck#and there’s also that becky episode. which the less said about the better#but that beats an entire show of traumatising and violating him again and again and then refusing to ever directly acknowledge it or give#it any narrative attention#i genuinely think s7 is the only full season of spn after s5 which treats sam like a main character#s6 maybe? probably? soulless sam is pretty crucial. but sam doesn’t even have his memories of cage trauma then which bores me (sorry)#but like. s8 only at the end. s9 only really in the first half. s10 not at all. s11 it suddenly seems like they’ve remembered he’s a real#character and ur soooo hopeful until suddenly they just forget again and decide he isn’t relevant#haven’t seen any other seasons yet <3#oliver talks#spn#supernatural#spn s7
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your superhero AU has broken my heart 💔💔💔 protective Ted is so important to me
thank you!! ive been enjoying playing with it. and yeah!! like. i just. protective, pining ted and trent's like i am NOT a damsel!! (<- in this instance, is, in fact, a damsel. he will make an exception for one (1) person)
and like more seriously just. the trust it's about the trust!!! trent doesn't rely on anyone and he gets himself out of bad situations and he's lowkey terrified of this hero who's got him cornered and he's been in this horrible situation for so long but then it's ted and he immediately relaxes. and ted--you know ted realized they had trent and immediately panicked and was ready to just bust in there and it was only beard holding him back and making him be practical about it that didnt have him just bursting through the walls ten minutes after realizing. and him realizing trent trusts him.... holding him and being like oh. i can protect him this way and i can comfort him this way and it's working... augh
anyway im glad you like it 😩
#listen. im a simple man. sometimes i want to write my blorbo being battered and scared getting rescued#but it doesnt always make sense for whatever fandom it is so. hence. elaborate au#admittedly that wasn't my sole motivation for writing it or anything but it was up there.#ANYWAY can you blame him?#trents like im a reporter and a damn good one villains literally hate kidnapping me because im the worst hostage and heroes hate rescuing m#bc i am no fucking damsel.#and then ted 'tenderly holds him as he rescues him and asks him so so softly if hes okay with big warm brown eyes' lasso comes along#and its like. okay so i can get out on my own or i can let my crush simply cradle me in his beefy arms and carry me home. hmm#(im being silly ofc but it also has a lot more to do with like. the actual circumstances. but i think that if trent got kidnapped in the re#regular way where hes just rolling his eyes bc this is How The Game Goes ted would show up and he'd be like#oh nooooo look ive been tied up.... (glances down then sticks hands back in ropes) oh nooooo#and the villains like what the h--#please actually now a crack version of this au where trent just lets himself get kidnapped so ted can rescue him and they're the world's mo#most obnoxious couple. villains stop kidnapping him entirely bc then that one hero just shows up and they banter--totally ignoring the vill#villain--for like ten whole minutes while beard quietly dismantles the villain's shit behind them#ANYWAY IM SORRY IVE GOTTEN OFF TRACK#askbox#anonymous#superhero au
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what ghost haunts you?
the ghost of devotion .
your body was crafted to be loved and to be adored. you write with the touch of a poet, the fingertips of a lover. if you are not loved, you are not whole. you are made to be sculpted by the hands of another into something perfect. without their love, you feel as though you may crumble without the support of purpose their touch provides. when ernest hemingway wrote “it was too good to last.” when ocean vuong wrote, “i miss you more than i remember you.” when david foster wallace wrote, “everything i’ve ever let go of has claw marks on it.”
the ghost of the damned .
you rot with the need for something more than what you have. the ghost is built up of the feeling of stagnation. you find it staring at the ceiling with sleep - blurred vision ; this is the third night you have met its eyes in the early hours of the morning. you tear yourself apart looking for comfort, for validation, for acceptance. but it never feels quite enough. you ruin everything you touch, despite every attempt to be more than what you have always been. you would sculpt yourself as something perfect for those around you, but you are no artist. when albert camus wrote, “be silent, heart; there is no hope!” when lucille clifton wrote, “maybe i should’ve wanted less. maybe i should’ve ignored the bowl in me, begging to be filled.” when taylor swift said, “i’m still on that tightrope, i’m still trying everything to get you looking at me.”
tagged by @primordyalsoul ty sumin!!!!
#TAGMEME.#iiiiiIIINTERESTING.....#dark's is fine as is but dai#his relationship with independence/dependence can get a little complicated#his desire is to be independent and he's stubborn about it- hence his rejecting dark's concerns or help sometimes#(that's where the 'what took you so long to call me?' comes from in tandem with constantly reminding daisuke#that they're one and the same; that dark -is- on daisuke's side and very much so. wholly loves and accepts him)#dark's longing is also a reflection of daisuke's longing; to be accepted and loved even within himself for his own flaws and faults#the reality for daisuke too is that so many people around him help and try very hard to care for him from his parents to his friends#the same way everybody remarks he's always trying to do his best for others- which is partly a symptom of dai wanting to be reliable#rather than solely relying on others all of the time... it goes in a big circle#smth smth coexistence and daisuke's simultaneous fear of being ostracized/persecuted for being dark#smth smth dante's inferno and the circle of thieves stealing each other's bodies but the way dark and daisuke learn to share#smth smth you were born to be a phantom thief but it's love that transforms you#dark's longing and loneliness is simultaneously daisuke's longing and loneliness always and forever BUT dark's stagnancy#his supposed state of perfection his immutability that makes him unearthly unhuman - he quietly loathes#dark relies on daisuke to change him too; to be kinder. warmer. the boy's his heart#the same way he's daisuke's supporting dream and aspiration!!!#aw man tag essay. embarrassing. point is dai's very devoted was born for it was destined for it#his family's love gets to the point it's overbearing sometimes but it's so so so genuine and so is his own once he gets to a state of it#but one cannot dismiss ...... the stubborn 'i can do it myself i don't need you' attitude(tm) dai has at dark sometimes#(even though dark is sooooo pathetic n desperate to be relied on)
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