"When You Wish Upon A Star”

A Nuts & Dolts RWBY Volume 8/9 Dream Sequence Vent Fanfic

//context: Ruby is having a dream between when she fell into the void with Neo, and when she wakes up on the Beach with everyone else. As for the nature of this dream, read the description below. //tw: Vent Fic, Suicidal Thoughts/Actions, Nihilism, Despair/Existential Dread (Don't worry, it has a happy ending, nobody dies I PROMISE) //description: In this dream, she is at the end of her journey having defeated Salem and Cinder, and having moved on to a peaceful life of solitude as one of the Heroes of Remnant, she experiences a feeling of emptiness and dread having lost so much to get here, including some of the things that may have been what she needed to find motivation to keep going. However, a miracle presents itself because of her faith. Just what will Ruby experience that could possibly change her mind from giving everything up now that she believes she's fulfilled her purpose? //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// "When You Wish Upon A Star" by Rangarl It had been forever. Finally, after what felt like years of turmoil, revelations, and mind-shattering conflict and efforts, though she was at the end of her journey, and though the world was a safer place, Ruby Rose was always reminded more than anyone else that she had lost two of her best friends along the way. She knows there wasn't much she could have done, but it wasn't something anyone else could relate to, expect a select few equally closed in and impacted allies... Though, despite the tragedy and losses of these close-minded warriors of the heart, one in particular she was lucky enough to meet one more time before fate took her away from her for good. Ruby indeed had many regrets about Pyrrha, though she never knew her as well as Jaune, as for her other friend she had this experience with, though Ruby blames herself, she mainly wishes she had never roped this one pure soul into all of this in the first place. Of anyone, she missed Penny the most, and Ruby surprisingly found herself in the position Penny had been in before she met her; Wishes gone unanswered despite the sheer silence of the universe to her plea, no matter how impossible it was regardless... Loneliness in a world where not a soul could compare to what she had known before it came crashing down... It was just as Penny had told her how she was before Ruby introduced herself into her life, and now it was too late. She couldn't have done anything about it. In fact, she felt partly responsible for having made her so weak as a real human soul compared to her unfeeling shell earlier on... was it worth just one hug and no goodbye? Of everything, though everyone had happy lives they could return to such as the happy couple of Yang and Blake and their lifestyle of symbiotic support and understanding for what they had been through, Ruby felt alone. She had shut off Weiss and Uncle Qrow if they ever tried to get in touch with her, and it came to a point where her depression became too compelling of a force against those she knew who had been looking out for her. All she could do was sit at the windowsill and look at the stars as if she were looking back. She would talk to her every night when she would be all alone, and she would tell her how she feels and that she misses her. She apologized for everything every time she could think of a regret, and prayed that she would forgive her wherever she was... As for Ruby herself, her day to day life was distant from others when making her rounds at best and shut in all day at worst. Though they were celebrated heroes, due to the requests of immediate family they were all promised regular civilian lives... however, life could never be the same as it was when she felt a sense of purpose, a world to save and people to help her keep going... If Ruby couldn't have the one she felt closest with, the one who understood her more than anyone, and if she couldn't be as close with anyone else knowing that there was only one person meant for her to share life with, being the girl who not only was more human and polite than anyone she had ever met, but had the least chances to truly live since others saw her as a machine... she truly was more than anyone could've prepared themselves for, and she was too good for this world more than anything. Penny had told her in the last days that she saw her before the tragedy that she'd never told anyone except her that she'd been praying for someone to bring her out of this rut she'd been in for all of her life, that she had never realized that what she had that resembled emotions could be understood so fluently by someone as equally willing to be understanding as Ruby. Ruby never realized until the last hug everyone and her got from Penny that when she could finally understand how she felt, her heart was in complete agreement with her soul that these emotions weren't just part of her programming like everyone thought. It was way, way too much. Ruby had reached a breaking point. Without her, she realized that now that the world had been saved, aside from what had been taken from her, and the death and destruction that had plagued her heart up until this point, corrupting her soul without such a pure ray of light in her life, she wished more than anything to be with her. Ruby looked in the mirror with herself, and with a part of her mind reminding her of what she had wished she hadn't remembered, the answer held itself out to her. She looked herself into the windows of her soul, silver eyes... A well of power that could vanquish anything she found in the way of her mission if she felt absolute conviction and motivation that what she was doing was absolutely right... it was a power that innately combatted the very nature of the Grimm, who fed off of fear, a lack of conviction or hope... just what she was feeling. But if conviction in a future of no future were to exist, had she become this evil? Would Ruby's eyes vanquish herself? Could she banish herself with her own power to join her best friend if it meant she thought it was the only way out? As Ruby stared, it was the event horizon staring back that greeted her. Hopelessness in her face bred an echo chamber of despair and conviction in a futureless future that held its hand out like a handshake with Death itself. If her eyes of silken white reflect white, yet it represents the opposite if but to vanquish itself, is it truly light? Ruby had no chance to question it, because she didn't want to... but something still beckoned in the back of her mind wondering what life would be like if she didn't stop here... Where would she go? Who would she meet? How? Could anyone be as sweet in a world without danger where everyone is spoiled with peace? Was danger the only answer? It was as if this hand that held itself out to Ruby were a dark side of herself to clash with her light... that was the only answer... yet, it was herself. Her eyes glow now, not with white or black now, but gray, a middle ground as her free will slips into an abyss as she accepted her fate and let her rage and self destruction consume her. It was time. Her halves were ready to become whole as she were to remove herself from this world now that she had achieved her mission so she could be with the one she belonged with. But as she gripped her temples until her nails began to dig so hard that her head began to bleed, she heard another voice. Not in front of her, or within herself, but behind her. "Ruby..." "Ruby... Rose?" Ruby turned from the mirror to face the evening window. She hadn't left it open last she checked... but the moon was never so bright since it could never be whole here. Perhaps today was a lantern festival? She couldn't keep track of the days anymore, so it wouldn't surprise her... ...Yet, afraid someone might be trying to break in, she steps away from the mirror to check it and find not a soul in sight... but she looks up to block the beam blinding her to see that the moon was no longer several tiny pieces dimly reflecting an incomplete whole, but it was one again. Ruby blinks and sees that the moon is just as she remembers, and tonight there indeed were lanterns... but something was off. It's fall, yet the festival of wishes doesn't begin until spring! From this far away, they looked blue like the stars in the sky. They wanted to be one in the same, but could both really grant her wish? Does this mean what she thinks it means? In denial, Ruby slams her fist down on the windowsill, closing the window with a slam of her interal rage as she returns to the mirror having gotten lost in false past hopes, she told herself. However, as Ruby approaches the mirror, she sees somehow that her mirror had broken just like the moon... in the shards she no longer saw her conviction. Something was messing with her... but why? Hadn't she deserved to die? Wasn't she ready? Had she not already accomplished everything she was meant to do in this life? "Please, Ruby." Ruby turned in fear, but nobody was there, she knew it. Something was messing with her. Perhaps her loneliness has finally driven her to insanity. She grabbed a shard of glass from the mirror, causing the other shards to fall from its baseboard at once with a deafening clatter that begged the mind in its very nature to snap. "Who the hell are you?! What do you want from me!? Can't you see all I want is to leave this place?!" Ruby screamed, wielding the glass shard with a grip so hard her palms almost cut themselves, if not her assailant-to-be. Ruby put her back against the wall and made sure nothing could surround her. Nothing was in her room, but she knew looks could be deceiving... Suddenly, however, a pair of hands reach out from the blank space within the realm behind the mirror. However, rather than a grip of malice like Ruby had set over herself in her reflection, it was as if something was freed from within it... to protect her. One hand covered her mouth while the other fought the glass shard from her hand. It was as if it was trying to stop her, but not to kill her. The shard clatters to the ground with a sound that inspired confusion and fear instead of rage like the glass from a moment ago. Then, a clear voice poked itself from the space within, and spoke in hear ear with a whisper that was forceful yet gentle and familiar... what was this? "Ruby...! Please, look what you're doing to yourself! Stop it!" Ruby fought her head back with her neck to see who it was until she saw the face of what she denied more than anything she had ever seen. Ruby freaked out and dropped the glass before falling forward, and scrambling backwards. "No... you're not here... you can't be. You're... n-not alive... anymore. I... I don't want to be haunted like this...! I... I..." Ruby's voice died as she could only fumble, but Penny stepped out from the mirror to stop her from doing anything rash. "Ruby! It's okay now, I've come to save you... I... I saw you here, and I couldn't do anything, but I wanted to stop you... so I... I'm here now." She made no sense, but Ruby, who was clearly older and torn was in sheer shock to see her as young as the day she never got to say goodbye. She had to voice this. "Penny... I... I never got to say goodbye to you... I... I know now what you've felt back then more than any day since you met me..." Ruby slowly got up, Penny had to give her room due to the cramped and messy bedroom, but they managed, despite the sheer denial in play here. "But why are you here? I... It should have been me. I should've been the one to die for you... I've been doing what you told me you did every day since you were gone, just praying you'd be back, but... Why? And how?!" Penny got to one knee, and held her hand out to Ruby. Ruby, confused, takes her hand, and welcomes her to sit, after which she scoots around to her shoulder and sits next to her rather than across from her to help her breathe. She already was exuding unadulterated fluids of regret and longing from every orifice on her face right now, so Penny simply did what she helped her learn. "Ruby, think back. You helped me learn that wishes come true when you want to make a change in your life where fate is unfair, remember?" She turned her head to her broken sunshine. "Penny...! I... I...!!" She couldn't respond, but she knew once it was all over she'd have so much to say, she just couldn't say it. "I know Ruby... you don't need to tell me. You've helped me, in reality, and it was my decision to protect you, so you don't need to regret anything - That's why I'm here, after all. I don't want you blaming yourself one bit, okay?" Penny wraps her arms around Ruby's closest to hers. "Can I ask you something, Ruby?" She closed her eyes and rested her head on her shoulders to calm her, somehow having an incredible effect on her. It was otherworldly, like nothing she had ever witnessed in any of her days of combatting and banishing Salem and Cinder from this world. It was... true. All she had to do was voice herself. "A... Anything! I, why, I'll tell you anything, Penny! Please, tell me! I'd be so happy to hear you ask me anything! Anything... Just one more time, please..." Ruby wanted to cry on her, but she didn't want to tarnish her perfect image, not when this was her only chance to tell her what she'd been waiting to say. "I... I never got to talk with you about how you feel. So Ruby, are you okay?" "What? Of course, Penny! I... I missed you! And I... why, I..." "No, Ruby, that's not what I mean. I... I wanted to know if you're okay because I'm here... is that true, Ruby?" "What?! I... *sniff* I... I've been... no! I've been so alone! You... you didn't deserve to die like that! All I've wanted was to be with you... I would've died to be with you... I... I didn't want to live if it wasn't with you, because all you've ever wanted was to live... how could I?" Penny looks up and looks Ruby in her eyes, using her hand to motion their heads in line of each other. Her eyes were nothing like she had remembered. Penny's eyes were more alive than she'd ever remembered, yet it felt so far knowing she might not get another chance like this. "Ruby... I... I've learned many things since I've been gone. About the heart... about fate, simply watching you fight despite my loss... but all the powers that let me follow you in the first place helped me realize something, Ruby... I..." She paused, taking her hand off of her face and putting it down and facing her head down while her eyes look up at her still... "Ruby... I will never get the opportunity to love anyone... other than you." Ruby's lip began to quiver. "So... I just came to let you know that... I'm going to be your guardian angel. I... I've been given a very important job, and I've been given this one night to tell you everything I wish I knew when I was just a girl... a girl you helped me realize I was all along, Ruby. You gave me this chance... so, thank you." Silence stood for a minute, so with that, Penny slowly got up, and Ruby watched her walk back to the mirror. Ruby had to take every moment she was given to comprehend what was happening, but it was too much for her human mind, even after all of what she had done in every moment to save everyone but her and Jaune's true love. It was a battle against herself, but in a new way, and yet, she had to muster something... anything, before she leaves. Anything. As Penny turned to give her a goodbye, Ruby had gotten up and wrapped herself around her, lips against her own. It was all she knew she could do for her, and she didn't want to risk never seeing her again without telling her what she knew was true even if she tried to deny it. Penny at first was surprised at her action, but it took her no time at all to realize that this is everything that both of them had ever wanted, truly. It was to be understood - no... - To be loved. Penny had Ruby in her arms, and her funny short friend that she knew was still in there all along felt like their soul was finally set free. This was what you would do for a loved one, they both knew, and they reconciled in this truth, casting away all false conviction and remembering this as a reminder for the rest of their lives as long as they may live. Ruby looked up at her slight height difference over her, unsure if things were always this way. All she knew was that she wanted to protect her, and to be protected - Yet, she knew this was always going to be true, and they knew that now. "Penny... thank you so much... I... I love you so much! Please... please come back again! I... I'm so sorry I let you go! I'm so afraid to let you go... I-" "-Ruby, I'm going to be here for you. I... I love you too. You taught me what it meant to feel protected, and now hoping for all I've ever wanted has let me be part of someone I've never wanted to let go... so keep that faith for me, Ruby, and for you too. It's... it's what makes you so beautiful... inside your own heart, and your own soul, just like me. That's what I realize I felt within your heart the first time you told me I was your friend, whether you knew what you meant or not." Ruby hugged Penny again really hard this time, almost like the first time Penny had hugged her, because she knew this might be the only chance she has to tell her how she feels. "I...! I love you too, Penny! I-I'm going to be praying that you come back again one day, and one day that I'll join you! Please look over me, and never let me go, okay? I hope I've proven everything to you, and I'll prove it to you every day I don't see you, even though I'll know you're there! That's... that's all I want" Ruby jumps up and kisses Penny one last time really well in each other's embrace and hold, knowing that they'll never be alone from each other, and they'll look out for each other until the day they'll truly reunite. With that, Penny thanks her with a smile and true laugh, a happiness she had never felt until now either. You could even see the tears on her face, they were true too. Ruby felt at peace, but in a way that would never be shaken, even if she had to save the world all over again in another life, even if it took forever. They slowly let each other's hands go with hesitancy, though they know now that it'll be okay, and they take a breath, knowing everyone breath from now until the end of time would be just as close, for they indeed trust the distance. Penny walks into the mirror slowly, looking back and waving a melancholy happy goodbye, knowing everything would be okay. With that, and a blinding light like Ruby's own Silver Eyes, the mirror mends itself, though Ruby can tell even now that through the slight scars in the reflection of how the glass was mended remains. Not a scar, rather, but a reminder. A reminder of return every time Ruby has ever had her doubts. Ruby stares a moment longer before she realizes her fist is clutching a bow of hers she left behind. Perhaps an accident, perhaps intentional, but Ruby clutches it hard upon seeing it before deciding its time... Ruby opens the front door, and gets on her scroll. Pacing and a walk outdoors on a peaceful evening are all she can ask for now, but she had to make amends, and Weiss picks up immediately. "Hey, Weiss... It's me. I... I think I'm ready to face you and everyone else. I... I'm sorry I left you guys for so long... Mhm... Yea, tomorrow morning sounds good... Thank you, Weiss. Goodbye, and good night." After hanging up, Ruby closes her eyes and takes in the night, sitting on a bench in the campus of the repaired beacon dorms she had now called her home. The air was eerily calm, but Ruby took in the peace the void presents now rather than what she had feared from it earlier. Before long, Ruby feels almost like she's about to find perfect rest... Drawing away into an unfamiliar world and whim, as if fleeting life on the very hope of the true heart, Ruby feels a pulse of energy throughout the cosmos centered on her, as if a supernova were witnessed in her shoes centered directly on her mind... like the world were resetting itself, and all she could do was watch as the infinite depths of space wound in on itself, crashing in on her as this dream came to an end. Then suddenly, a blinding flash of light, and the deafening ringing of silence enveloping it. Indeed, the void beckons, but dawn has risen, now. Lethargy sets in with a heatwave, and before long, the sound of crashing waves lightly on sand. Ruby opens her eyes to the blinding light of two sun's, but Jaune and the rest already seem to have noticed Ruby finally came too and flock around her, blocking the light for her. Their voices all began covering her at once. "Oh my god, you're okay! Goodness, Ruby, it's been hours, we thought you were a goner!" "Ruby, it's me, your sister! I'm okay! We're all here! Neo's here too, but we... we all survived... we... but..." "Ruby... I... I don't know how to put this... I... I'm so sorry." The cacophony of voices was much, but Ruby sat up unfazed... with few words and a glance at their faces, she realizes... "Penny... she's... she's gone, isn't she." Jaune's face becomes pale as he falls to his knees because of this, and quivers into a sobbing fit as the rest of the team try to support him and Ruby, but Ruby is calm. She sits up, Crescent Rose not far from her. She turns her head to the point on everyone's mind, and there she lies on the coast, as if she were fast asleep taking a rest almost like she were just a moment ago. Ruby gets up and walks over to her. Jaune follows, and having been helped up by the gang, he explains that Cinder was going to kill Penny for her maiden powers, and she got fatally wounded, but she asked him to kill her before Cinder so it couldn't happen while Weiss and Blake fended Cinder off. Ruby, however, in her moments just before her rest, as if having prepared her for a future she had yet to face, and maybe even prevent, Ruby shed no tears. Ruby knelt down to Penny, and took her hand. Ruby then found it, the bow in her dream, clutched in her own hand. Ruby was shocked to see this, others not noticing like she had or even not at all, Ruby decides to place it in her palm before closing it. "I'll keep praying for you like you did for me. You are my guardian angel, and I know you will be here for me, Penny. If you can really hear me, just know that... that I love you." Ruby then leans down and kisses her porcelain face, plush yet cold, but not like steel. She was free now, that she knew. Weiss, Blake, Yang, and Jaune were all shocked by this admission, but they accept it and Ruby's words, and mourn in their own ways. Neo, too, stood feet away, staring, to which Ruby looks up and sees while the rest look at each other and exchange their thoughts on what they witnessed Ruby say and do, as well as their situation. Ruby gets up and walks over to Neo. Ruby is surprised she isn't going after her, but can't help but ask her... "You... you attacked me earlier, but... what happened?" She couldn't respond, which Ruby quickly realized, but to her surprise, she got crafty and began writing out a message in the sand with her illusion semblance. "They told me you told them you didn't kill Roman, that it was a Grimm... I believed Cinder cared for me and my mission of getting revenge at all costs, even when I thought you and I were going to die... but being betrayed began making me question these things... and seeing you mourn over your friend reminded me of how I felt when Roman died. At first I wanted you dead, but now I don't know what I want. All I can ask for is some time alone..." Ruby felt a shocking level of empathy from her, but this empathy stemmed from defeat, so neither really knew, but needless to say it stood for a lot considering she wasn't trying to kill her, and that was all there needed to be, frankly. Ruby, however, felt like she had learned a thing or two, so from now on she felt she would swear an equal level of empathy in reaching her goal, even if it meant triumphing her past evils, and today she felt like starting here. "You might not be ready for this, but we took in Emerald after she came to the same conclusion about Cinder and Salem's double-crossing that you have. If losing a loved one has taught me anything, it's that you and I fought for similar things for opposite sides. All I can hope for now is that you find the peace to overcome this, whether you'd like to join us or not. Good luck is all I can say I guess." "You too."

Lovecraftian Horror: Do’s & Don’ts

So, I was on @pwbi​‘s Discord, when someone posted a picture of a drawing of a fossil giant fish and it got called an Eldritch Abomination. This makes me feel angry and so it’s time for the Patently Absurd Guide to Incomprehensible Horror.

Eldritch Abomination is the generic term for a monster hearkening back to Lovecraft’s Cthulhu Mythos, but it has become so overused that TV Tropes at one point infamously called the titular witch’s ghost in Scooby Doo and the Witch’s Ghost an Eldritch Abomination.

So, in the name of helping pop culture (or at least D&D) understand what it really means, there are a few key points I have identified, and if you’re lacking more than one then you generally don’t have an Eldritch Abomination.

Unfathomable Form: This is what everyone immediately thinks of. Unfortunately, because Lovecraft’s work popularized the trope and his breakout star is Cthulhu, everyone thinks you can add tentacles and you’re done. NO. Cthulhu is low-key a bitch in Lovecraft’s own work. He’s just a squid head, a man’s body, and bat wings.

Unfathomable Form means that whatever you are looking at is unfathomable - it’s not just that you don’t understand it, it’s that you can’t. We all crack jokes about game glitches - but imagine if one of those happened in real life.

“Ha ha ha! His ass is clipping through his face while he floats towards me... wait I’m not playing GMod right now!”

But how about we take something less seemingly silly. How about color? Most human eyes are sensitive to 3 wavelengths of light, resulting in the spectrum of colors we all know and love.

But let’s consider the mantis shrimp. Their eyes are sensitive to 12 wavelengths of light. Try imagining and adding 9 additional impossible colors to the rainbow. You cannot do it because you cannot fathom something you have no frame of reference for. You literally can’t understand the world as seen by the mantis shrimp, and that’s a real animal!

Incomprehensible Motives: Let’s talk about one of my other favorite franchises for a moment: The Elder Scrolls. Most people would probably expect me to cite Hermaeus Mora as an eldritch abomination, but he fails this particular test. Old Mora simply craves knowledge. He’s curious, and that is an inherently very human motive. But do you know which Daedric Prince does pass this test?

Sheogorath, Daedric Prince of Madness. Because contrary to how he’s portrayed in-game, he’s not the Daedric Prince of “Ooh Shiny” he is the Daedric Prince of Madness - ALL forms of insanity at. The. Same. Time.

Have you ever been depressed? How about manic? Are you bored? Excited? He is all of those things and so many more at every moment of his entire existence. That is a state of mind that is literally incomprehensible to any human and we didn’t even have to start making up entirely new feelings.

Some people will comment with the “Blue and Orange Morality” trope, and that’s a fair analogy, but it still falls flat, because most of the time the moral compass being pained blue and orange is not incomprehensible, just different from our own.

Impossible Origins: Lovecraft codified this with his description of the Star Spawn, Cthulhu’s posse. The Elder Things - basically starfish aliens - look weird to humans, but are made of the same mundane matter. The Star Spawn and Cthulhu himself are made of some kind of matter but not the matter native to our universe. It has inherently different properties from ordinary matter that look like magic weirdness from a scientific perspective, strongly implied to be why Cthulhu’s face regenerates when a boat plows through it.

That ain’t regeneration, just what the stuff he’s made of does.

Hermaeus Mora flunked the motives test, but he passes this one with flying colors. He is reputedly made of concepts discarded during the creation of the Elder Scrolls universe as incompatible with the fundamental basis of reality. He is quite literally made of concepts that cannot exist. Perhaps something like a sharp sphere? Perhaps that’s too close to comprehensible to be one of them.

Bonus Criterion - Cosmic Insignificance: A lot of Lovecraft’s work hasn’t aged well, and not just because of the racism. His works simply don’t inspire fear. But to be fair, they’re not really aimed at creating fear, but at a sort of existential despair.

In the universe of the Cthulhu Mythos, humanity is nothing special. Everything we think we know about the universe is wrong. Physics is fundamentally different than what we believe. And on top of that, gods exist, but they aren’t any of the gods we’ve ever believed in, and these gods don’t really give a damn about our existence one way or another. Morality and religion are just lies we tell ourselves so that we can sleep better at night.

The Cthulhu Mythos is essentially a pessimist’s view of nihilism, and that’s why I’m making it a bonus category rather than a fundamental one. Nothing in the original works written by Lovecraft himself has an inherent “madness aura” like you see in D&D. In the works of Lovecraft, people go mad because they find out that everything they believe in is made up and wrong and they don’t cope well.

Except... most of us Millennials and the generations coming after us are also pretty nihilistic. The Boomers are ruining the world and we have no future to look forward to, so we’ve decided to enjoy life while we can using what little we have.

Lovecraft looked into the Abyss, and when the Abyss looked back it terrified him. My generation seems to have collectively looked into the Abyss, and when it looked back we decided to wave.

Book Read: A Tale for the Time Being by Ruth Ozeki Beer Paired: Grimm After Image (Double IPA) 

What We Love About the Book -- 

Why do we read? To escape? To understand? To belong? To relate? I think there are a million reasons that we read books. Of course the human need to story tell and communicate is at the center of this, and although there are really only three or four central characters in Ruth Ozeki’s A Tale for the Time Being, this novel understands the importance of human connection through storytelling. It does this on many levels. First, by connecting the reader to the actual plot of the book, but also within the book as Ruth struggles to piece together the story she finds in Nao’s diary, as Nao tells the story of her great-grandmother, and as Nao reveals her story as well. All of this makes up a moving story that shows the importance of human connection through our own stories and the stories of those we surround ourselves with.

Here is what the book blurb says …

“On a remote island in the Pacific Northwest, a Hello Kitty lunchbox washes up on the beach. Tucked inside is the diary of a sixteen-year-old Japanese girl names Nao Yasutani. Ruth – a writer who finds the lunchbox – suspects that is it debris from Japan’s 2011 tsunami. Once she begins to read the diary, Ruth quickly finds herself drawn into the mystery of Nao’s fate. Meanwhile in Tokyo, Nao, uprooted from her home in the U.S., bullied at school, and watching her parents spiral deeper into disaster, has decided to end her life. But first, she wants to recount the story of her great-grandmother, a 104-year-old Zen Buddhist nun, in the pages of her secret diary…Full of Ruth Ozeki’s signature humor and insight, A Tale for the Time Beingdeftly blurs the line between fact and fiction.”

Intrigued? I hope so. This book is really lovely. It is real and simple, but also an inspiring testament to the human spirit with all its beautiful flaws. Some of the most enchanting parts of the book are its moments of magical realism. Although very much within the real world, sometimes heightened or almost magical things happen. Now, I’m not talking about flying broomsticks or magical realms (although I very much enjoy that as well). Instead, I am talking about the ability of one girl’s diary to affect and connect both her life and the lives of several others across the world, or the magic of a 104-year-old nun named Jiko, to bring peace to many with very few words. There are dreams and there are realities in this book. There is fact and there are stories. The magic of A Tale for the Time Being is in the extraordinary hands of ordinary people.

This book also touches on the very important subjects of depression and mental health. As you read, you watch the characters struggle in heartbreaking and powerfully human ways. It is so important that issues and problems such as these are spoken about, loudly, and Ozeki does not shy away from the reality and the severity of these remarkable human moments. Instead she writes about them, eloquently and seamlessly understanding the painful moments, as well as the lighter moments. At one point, Nao explains, “I’m a ronin, which is an old word for a samurai warrior who doesn’t have a master… The way you write ronin is 浪人 with the character for wave and the character for person, which is pretty much how I feel, like a little wave person floating around on the stormy sea of life.”

However, don’t be intimidated. Although it deals with serious and often painful issues, A Tale for the Time Being also gives you slice-of-life humanity, with all its quirks and charm. Nao’s beautifully, real voice, will connect to any reader as she navigates her teenage world and all that comes with it. It seems that although she has tackled some very difficult themes and issues in this book, Ruth Ozeki’s skill lies in finding the humanity and the relatability. Her writing style and characters are mirror images, as as readers we can see real life and ourselves reflecting back.

Which is why, A Tale for the Time Being, is so thought provoking. It has been a long time since I read a book that left me thinking about life so much. Many times throughout the book the characters question the importance of self in relation to time and existence on a universal scale. How are we, as individuals, important or even noticeable in relation to all beings across all of time? And, furthermore, how can we leave a mark or even make our existence worthwhile, because if we can’t then is it even worth existing? These questions haunt the minds of the two main characters Nao and Ruth, and seep into the mind of the reader. Nao writes, “…since these are my last days on earth, I want to write something important, too. Well, maybe not important, because I don’t know anything important, but something worthwhile. I want to leave something real behind… If you waste time, is it lost forever?” The theme of time beings illustrates these struggles and persists throughout the whole book. Nao explains that, “A time being is someone who lives in time, and that means you, and me, and everyone of us who is, or was, or ever will be.” This Zen Buddhist idea of a time being is powerful, and empowering, and unsettling. It fuses everyone and everything. How appealingly inclusive, but discouragingly trivial it can make one feel.

But, as daunting as these questions and themes feel, hope sneaks in as the voices of these two women empower and inspire each other, all without ever meeting. Somehow across time and space they are able to influence and help each other, even in the darkest abysses, by encouraging connection and understanding amongst the people they encounter. Tell me this is not what we need as humankind right now?

I loved reading A Tale for the Time Being. I usually devour good books, reading them as fast as my eyes and brain will let me. This however took me a bit longer to get through. Not because I didn’t like it, but more because I needed to sit with it. Oftentimes, I wanted to think about what I was reading. To ponder what Ruth and Nao were pondering on. I found this funny, because in the book, as Ruth reads Nao’s diary, she tries to follow Nao’s timeline, not reading ahead but instead reading one day and a time.

“How do you search for lost time, anyway? As she thought about the question, it occurred to her that perhaps the clue lay in the pacing. Nao had written her diary in real time, living her days, moment by moment. Perhaps if Ruth paced herself by slowing down and not reading faster than the girl had written, she would more closely replicate Nao’s experience.”

Somehow, subconsciously I ended up doing this too. I ended up letting the characters effect me in real time, and letting their stories sink in as they let them sink into themselves. This is the type of book, whose characters stay with a reader. I think that more then the story, it is the characters whose influence and insight come to life. Ruth Ozeki’s A Tale for the Time Being is why we read: to escape the troubles of life, to find a cathartic outlet, to find humor in darkness, and to come back and connect to each other through our shared humanity and experiences. Like the warm and bright sun on this spring morning, A Tale for the Time Being, will refresh your aching soul, and comfort you heart.

**Just as a side note I wanted to mention, the bamboo plant that Chris and I included in the picture feels very relevant to this book as well. It was my grandma’s. She passed away two years ago, and Chris and I inherited it. Although she was not a Zen Buddhist nun or an anarchist, like Nao’s great-grandmother, she was very important in both of our lives. Her influence and wisdom (and oftentimes goofiness) still pepper our lives. Anyway, we put the bamboo in the picture, and it was only after that we realized it significance and parallel to the book. Kismet, right?!

What We Love About the Beer 

Now I know we’re not supposed to judge a book by its cover, or a beer by its label, but first impressions are important, and the floating/dancing people all over Afterimage’s label instantly aligned with Ruth Ozeki’s time beings. It seemed to me like the visual of this existential idea of all beings as a part of time and space together. So, it looked the part, but did what was inside that can match as well?

Yes. Below is what Grimm Artisanal Ales gives as their description for Afterimage on their website.

“Juicy, juicy, juicy.  Hazy orange, soft carbonation, plush fruity aromas.  Immense mango, marmalade, pine, honeysuckle, and lemon flavors.  Smack dab in between Lambo and Tesseract on the sweet-to-dry spectrum.  Just a hint of bitterness.  On draft, plus 200 cases of hand-labeled cans for all you aluminum fiends.  First Grimm can ever!  No hoarding, drink now please.”

Drinking this beer is like taking a sip of something really special. In the book, Nao explains Zazen, her “SUPAPAWA” (or superpower ), a form of meditation taught by her 104-year-old great-grandmother, Jiko. She says, “…in other words, no matter where you are…you return your mind to zazen, it feels like coming home…Zazen is a home that you can’t ever lose, and I keep doing it because I like that feeling, and I trust old Jiko, and it wouldn’t hurt for me to try to see the world a little more optimistically like she does.” That is what I instantly thought of when I drank this beer. It’s like taking a sip of all the good things in life, but with a little bit of bitterness as well. Not to mention all the fruity, flowery, juicy, parts of this beer, make me think that if I closed my eyes I would be sitting in a Japanese monastery, on the cliffs above the ocean.

Its almost like Grimm made this beer for A Tale for the Time Being. Then again, in my book Grimm can do no wrong. It is one of my favorite breweries. Up until now Grimm Artisanal Ales has been a “nomadic brewery,” using the facilities of other breweries to craft their beers. However, this spring they will be opening their own brick and mortar brewery in Williamsburg, in Brooklyn, New York (another parallel to A Tale for the Time Being, as Nao and Ruth each struggle to find their respective homes). Can you hear us cheering with excitement? The other amazing thing about Grimm is like the odds that brought Nao’s diary across the ocean and into Ruth’s hands, each of their beers is a limited edition release, with no guarantee of ever being released again. So, if you can get your hands on this beer, or any of their beers for that matter, don’t hesitate – just drink!

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SO, THERE YOU HAVE IT! OUR INAUGURAL POST! HAVE YOU READ THIS BOOK OR SAVORED THIS BEER? WE HOPE YOU ENJOYED OUR THOUGHTS, AND THAT MAYBE THEY HAVE INSPIRED YOU TO GO OUT AND READ A TALE FOR THE TIME BEING, OR DRINK AFTERIMAGE…OR MAYBE NOT.  WE’D LOVE TO HEAR WHAT YOU THINK! LEAVE A COMMENT OR SEND US AN EMAIL, AND MAKE SURE TO FOLLOW THIS BLOG FOR MORE.  ANYWAY, THANKS FOR STOPPING BY OUR LITTLE CORNER OF THE CYBERSPHERE. FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM, @AN.ALE.OF.TWO.CITIES AS WELL.  WE CAN’T WAIT TO BRING YOU MORE #TALESANDALES!                                                            ALWAYS, ALEXANDRA & CHRIS