Joel sits awkwardly at a family dinner table that isn’t for him.
It’s nice and all, he reckons, for Impulse’s family to invite him over after he leaves the hospital. Even before—everything—Joel’s family hadn’t really been the “big meal around a big table” type, so he’s getting some new experiences here too. And it’s nice and all, that they want to thank him for his role in finding Skizz.
But like. It’s not like he or Impulse or Skizz could explain how it happened, when asked. “Magic brain ghosts” and “evil butterflies” and “Joel still isn’t certain all of that was real and is trying to pretend it wasn’t” puts a damper on that. Also, adults are kind of shit at talking around the fact Joel’s whole family is dead, so he gets the sense he’s sort of harshing the vibes, you know?
Still. It’s a nice gesture. He guesses. It’s free food at least, which is decent, and as close as Impulse and Skizz are, every time one of Impulse’s family says something stupid, Skizz taps Joel’s leg with his foot or steals a roll or something, and it makes Joel feel…
He’d have been sad if Skizz had died, probably. Like, he wouldn’t know. He didn’t come here to make friends, he came here to get a degree and get out. Also, that’s stupid, because it’s not like Joel would have known he was missing a really awkward congratulatory family dinner in which Skizz kept on trying to sneakily steal beans. Probably would have just moved right on. He’s not… friendly.
But.
They stand outside afterwards, waving by to Impulse, promising to walk together so that neither of them Vanish. They’re quiet.
“Thanks, man. That meant a lot to them,” Skizz says.
“Yeah, well, I can do stupid things for free food,” Joel says.
Skizz laughs. “It was nice having you there, too. Man, they’re even worse with you! It’s like not knowing you means they’re even more awkward about family tragedy.”
“Trust me, most adults are way worse. You should see my social worker,” Joel says.
“Didn’t he ditch you, dude?”
“Haha, yeah, he did,” Joel says.
They stare up at the streetlamps together.
“I was really ready to go for a bit there,” Skizz says. Joel’s hackles raise. Oh no. Emotions. Bad. Go away. “It was like—man, it felt like the whole world was empty. But when you showed up, it’s like I remembered… I’d miss dinners, dude.”
“I have no idea why, that kinda sucked,” Joel says, baffled and sarcastic, because he’s a moron who can’t handle emotional conversations, this is why everyone avoided him at the funeral, stupid.
Skizz breaks out laughing.
“You’re great, man! I’m glad we met. Uh, my place is only a block away, and I won’t go following any stupid butterflies. See you at school?”
“Yeah man. See you,” Joel says—
I am thou.
Thou art I.
Thou hath formed a new bond.
With the power of the Chariot Arcana, you shall build the chains with which to hold on to reality.
RANK 1!
“What the hell?” Joel says, tripping over his feet. “What? What? Where did—what the fuck that wasn’t Pygmalion oh god do I have more than one voice in my head—”
“Dude, are you okay?”
Skizz’s almost frustratingly strong and comforting arms grab Joel.
“Tell me you heard that,” Joel says desperately.
“I—I don’t know what you’re talking about. I could take you back to the hospital—no?”
“I am either crazy or am going to end up in a government lab?” Joel says, voice getting high and squeaky.
“We can ask Mr. Hills about it? He came to talk to me after I woke up in the hospital, apparently he like, knows stuff,” Skizz says.
“I don’t wanna,” Joel says.
“Tough luck, buddy, you just almost fell over and cracked your head open!”
Suddenly, Joel remembers a long-nosed man and a blonde in a very blue boat. He remembers a cryptic conversation about bonds and power and their importance. He takes a deep breath. “Can you cover your ears for a moment?” he says.
“Yeah, sure thing, why—”
Joel, as loudly as he can, screams. He hears several birds fly away. He pants.
“…Joel,” Skizz says.
“Yeah thanks man don’t worry about it let’s never speak of this again I’m sure it’s nothing. I definitely didn’t have a weird dream about this and should go to bed.”
“Yeah, okay, whatever you say,” Skizz says cheerfully before laughing, which Joel continues grumbling about all the way back to his apartment.
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*downs coffee like a shot* Before we go back to our regularly scheduled Linktober/Linktober Shadow (because I don't leave things unfinished if I can help it), I gotta get the idea of Revenant First out of my system and y'all get to suffer with me until it eventually ceases being an idea and it turns into an actual story. For some reason we talk a lot about First already being alive or already a ghost by the time the Chain meets him, but I don't think I've ever heard someone talk about him actually coming back to life and so y'all get to suffer with my insane ramblings like I'm an 1800's psychic ward patient who believes themselves to be a witch.
Can be x Reader or not idk just an idea that won't leave my mind.
Might expand on this later so Part out of I/?
Revenant First, who died for his people and in the name of his Goddess. All alone on the surface, fighting, fighting, fighting, always fighting. Just to make the land a little safer before the next hero arrives, just to contain the Imprisoned for a little while longer with likely nothing than a ordinary, common sword to his name and a slowly rusting armor.
Always giving so so so much for his people, always doing his best to protect them, though they scorned him, loathed him, didn't believe or support him, rejected him.
With a spirit so strong and lovely that a Goddess fell for him, hated herself for having to manipulate and put him through such horrid experiences just to save the many, just to turn the diamond of his soul into an unbreakable lonsdaleite blade agaisnt a mad deity.
Someone whose will would be enough to keep him going, just one more fight right? Just one more kill right? Forward, forward, ever onward, it doesn't matter if the flesh decays, if the blood drips drips drips until he is dry of it, if the liver doesn't process nutrients, if the lungs don't draw air, if the nerves feel nothing but the cold cold numbness of the winter of his final years, if the heart doesn't beat. If the armor rusts or the sword breaks. He must keep going, he must keep fighting.
To keep them safe he must have faith, faith that he can keep going, to grasp onto that one.single.thread of purpose until the day that fiery, indomitable, determined will finally burns out. Even if his Goddess may have forsaken him knowingly or unknowingly, even if his people have rejected him to the point he isn't even human anymore, even though they reviled him, even if that rejection should by all intents and purposes chained his spirit to the land or ground the jewel of his unbreakable soul into dust, he still loves them, still adores them, still wants to protect them.
No matter how long he must keep going for it. He wishes to see those he holds dear happy, though they cursed and imprisoned him once.
The Chain getting dropped into a completely empty, desolated and undeniably dead version of Sky's Hyrule, only to find the only living thing besides monster is a single man, with rusted gold armor and an old sword, a faded tunic of green with a long, crimson scarf like a bloody banner. With hair and eyes like theirs, undeniably a Link. But so very frigid, so very silent they almost didn't notice him, that they can't help but wonder just how many years he has spent there, eroding away, ruined but still kind, kind, so very gentle. A shadow of his former self, yes, but still himself, still so so so good, doing all he can until Sky's Era comes and maybe, just maybe, he can finally rest.
Or maybe not, after all, someone has to keep the land safe until the Hero after Sky comes around, no?
Just Revenant First in general.
Or maybe we give him the House in Fata Morgana treatment, the House in Fata Hylia Au if you will- *collapses from sleep deprivation*
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i'm reading a breach of trust (re? reading? it has more chapters than the last time i read it) and not only has it made me miss homework assignments because i can't STOP reading but the latest chapter makeshift=mogami twist is SOOOO well done. like the cycles of self abuse the mogami/ritsu parallels the way ritsu's character arc is breaking those cycles the AAAAAAA the themes. really good job thanks!
(ABoT)
yeah yeah yeah yeahyeahyeaheyah you get The Themes I'm
Mogami was present, this entire time, for Ritsu's whole character decay. Mogami got to affirm his whole poisoned world view through Ritsu, in real time, the whole way. That as an esper, you will be exploited by everyone who has the opportunity to take advantage of you. Mogami watched Ritsu retrace Mogami's own steps: taking desperate measures for the sake of saving a family member, violent measures, eating spirits, actions other people may suffer for, only to have the rotten consequences tear him down - because the people taking advantage of him were smarter, and more manipulative, and more powerful, and you--esper--are left to wonder how you could ever live with the consequences of your actions.
And Ritsu DOES reach the same conclusions as Mogami!! That people only ever want to use him. That being manipulative first, and violent first, and taking advantage of others first is the only way to protect yourself. That the world is rotten, and cruel, and dangerous. And--devastatingly, as of ch46--that those who stand to benefit from manipulating you absolutely will, and those consequences will be your fault (as Mogami did TO Ritsu).
...But.... but but but.... Mogami (Makeshift) was absent for the stretch of chapters between 37 and 43 (subtly, SUBTLY, Slipshod tells Ritsu as much ["Oh where is Makeshift?" Slipshod cooed.] and of COURSE Makeshift is absent. He has Mob back! He doesn't need to pal around in Ritsu's horde anymore, and he only reappears once he knows Teru, Ritsu, and Reigen have found the house and he needs a defense strategy.)
Which all means Mogami was absent for the time Ritsu spent with Reigen. He was absent for the talks Reigen had with Ritsu--for the bear and the burger and the meltdown in 41 and the apology that followed. For Teru coming back and apologizing. For Ritsu getting a taste of what it's like to have people who actually want to help.
He was absent for Ritsu breaking the cycle.
So even though Mogami got to have his big grand you and I are the same villain speech in ch46... he doesn't know the full story. He doesn't understand that Ritsu has something Mogami never had--support, patience, forgiveness, a reason to break the cycle, and a desire from Ritsu himself to do better, and get better, and be better, and live through this.
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