#like...being dead and losing himself
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I’m scared, and I need my brother.
s1/s4 (oh how the turntables)
#heroesedit#primatech#peter petrelli#nathan petrelli#heroes nbc#heroes#how to stop an exploding love#meant to do something extraordinary#am i an angel or a monster#anni edits#nbc heroes#i LOVE the s4 reverse of clingy vulnerable needy nathan who's begging for peter's advice and comfort#both are great. it just really is mutual ultimately. nathan just takes a long time to be desperate enough to admit it#like...being dead and losing himself#but HELL YEAH THAT CODEPENDENCE BABEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY i'll take a vat of it pls#heroes multiseason#heroes season 4
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no im still so unwell over this??? vince scribbled out the criticism of rody in the review of the bistro. help
Nooooo but literally. How he immediately discredits any bad word against Rody! It defo made me more convinced that the reason the party ended was because Rody's ex classmate made fun of Rody (and it is mentioned by one of the guests that Vincent can hear Rody very clearly from over there, there's no way he didn't notice that whole scene). I do wonder exactly what was said, since he's not afraid to be brutal to anyone that's not Rody.
If a customer ever treated Rody like shit in the typical way customers act towards service workers I don't think Vince would be too happy lmao.
POV: you treated your waiter like shit and now some white french man who smells like an ash tray starts glaring daggers at you.
Come look at my smiling deranged blorbo!
#dead plate#limon answers#seriously he's so...#his ass was never gonna fire Rody for shitty service. Why the fuck did I redo all the days to get perfect scores??????? orz#thought I'd lose the game but Vince is like kicking his feet and staring intensely at Rody (in love)#I was stressed!!!!! when I couldn't clean a table fast enough or making time to talk to vince while doing the shift?????#does he even care if i steal money???#oh also the implication of Rody being willing to steal money...for manon ofc#I really wanna know Manon...though she very much haunts the narrative haha. I have my own takes on their relationship-#but its not too deep and would probs be best supplemented by some further lore from the creator#but i do know manon was probably mentally in tears begging Rody to care for himself for once. boy your bathroom is flooding!!!#manon thinking shes going to finally date someone competent and stable when with Vince lmaooo#limon.txt
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Thenamesh. Tomb Raider. AU. Please.
Gil did his best to swim to the surface but it wasn't easy. The tunnel he had followed let out to a rather violent section of the river. He had chosen this slightly riskier path entirely because he had thought it might give him a head start on Thena.
Did Thena make it out okay?
He had bigger problems to worry about, like surviving this river.
He fought to the surface, gasping in what air he could before he was tossed aside again. Okay, so choosing the tunnel section close to the rapids was not his wisest decision. He was trying to think like his more reckless and impulsive colleague!
Colleague probably wasn't the right word for what they had. A frenemyship...a rivalry...some tension that he knew he felt, but was quite sure Thena was oblivious to. Not that it mattered now that he was drowning.
"Gil!"
He was hallucinating now. Much closer to drowning than he thought--great. He hit a rock under the water, its speed overpowering all the muscles he had worked so hard for. His air left him in one gulp.
He wasn't sure if it was a hallucination or not when he saw Thena in front of him. His eyes were barely open when she swam down to him. The river was calmer further from the surface. She swam right up to him, pressing her lips to his, pushing air from her lungs into his.
He must be dying, he thought.
Thena's hands gripped the straps of his bag, urging up back into the momentum of the river. He knew she was plenty strong herself. She would have to be, to be called 'Tomb Raider' by those in their profession, freelance or otherwise.
Thena gasped loudly as she surfaced first, then forcing his head up as well. "Breathe, you bastard!"
He didn't know how necessary the name calling was. But he did take in a breath--a real breath of air. So, he wasn't hallucinating, and he wasn't dead. He was surprised.
"Come on," she growled, still fighting against the current to keep him afloat. "Just keep breathing."
He tried his best, although he was waterlogged, to put it lightly. He felt her sharp talons of fingers creep around his pockets, finally pulling at the zipper of his bag, "hey!"
Thena grunted as she finally disposed of the counterweight he had in his side pocket, expressly for the purpose of switching out certain artifacts, potentially surrounded by traps. "Not a world of difference, but a stone is a stone."
He wasn't sure if that was a crack about how heavy he was or if she really was talking about the rock he was planning on switching out.
They did eventually make it to the side of the river. Thena grabbed onto the riverbank first, fingers dug into the grass and holding onto the strap of his bag for dear life. "Come on."
Gil groaned, dragging himself up out of the water after her. He did feel heavier after his impromptu river ride, he had to admit. He coughed up some water, although he was pretty sure he could hear Thena doing the same. "Thanks."
She remained facing away from him, also fighting to catch her breath. He had underestimated just how strong she was, apparently, given her ability to drag him to shore with those thin little arms. "Imbecile."
"Okay," he huffed, turning over to sit on his butt and lean back on his palms to gasp in the rest of his air. "I'll send you a card, I guess."
"What were you thinking?!"
Gil stared at her as she grasped the front of his soaking wet shirt, shaking him. Her voice was raw and warbled from the shouting and the almost drowning. But it was more than that; she had tears in her eyes.
She shook him again, looking terribly upset (angry and otherwise). "Why didn't you follow me?"
"I-I-" he shook his head, still stunned.
She grabbed his shirt with both hands now, pulling him closer so she could really shout in his face. "Why didn't you follow me?!--down my tunnel! It leads further downstream, at a lower altitude!"
She seemed awfully upset with him for...almost dying? Gil let her grab and shake him all she wanted though. Whatever helped her get it out (and not start punching him). "I didn't know. This was the way I came in."
"You could have died, Gil," she asserted, since apparently it bared repeating. She never called him Gil.
"I-" he blinked, sitting up more properly and gently reaching up to her hands. He tried to pry them away from him gently, and she let go as soon as he touched her. But her hands were so small, and so soft, and now they were so cold, too. He held them in his, "I'm sorry, Thena."
She didn't have a clever response to him holding her hands and wholeheartedly apologising. He still wasn't sure why he was apologising for almost dying on her, but what the Lady wanted, the Lady got.
Thena sighed, her hair now hanging around her cheeks limply after their little log ride. "I thought I was the reckless of the two of us."
The two of them made quite a pair, he thought. He chuckled, looking up at her in her hunched position up on her knees. His hand drifted, and he almost wondered what it was doing. He pushed back some of her loose strands escaping her braid, tucking them behind her ear again. "Guess I had to beat you to it, just this once."
Fuck, she was beautiful. If only her very existence didn't interfere with every job he had ever taken.
Thena looked him over, determining if he really was fit to travel or if he was having one last surge before croaking right in front of her. But she must have been satisfied, because she rocked back on her heels before standing. "Just this once, Gilgamesh."
He mourned how she called him Gil.
"Are you able to walk?" she asked more genuinely, more firmly, and more like her usual self. She glanced at him over her shoulder (with as little effort as possible). "Or should I come back for you."
"I'm fine, I'm fine," he insisted, even as he let out a loud groan to get on his feet again. "Maybe if I tell them I almost died trying to get that stupid idol they'll still pay me for my trouble."
"You did technically find it," she shrugged as they began trudging back to the main basecamp around the remains of the city. "I would vouch that your finder's fee still applies."
He smiled, tired as it was. Her shoulders sat lower than before, and she had never looked more delicate to him. But he dared to nudge her shoulder with his elbow, "thanks for saving me."
She declined to respond to that.
If she wanted to walk in silence then so be it. But he had to wonder, "where's the idol."
"Bottom of the river."
Fuck.
"It was made of gold, Gilgamesh, I could not possibly have swam with that on my person."
She abandoned it...for him? He looked at her curiously, but apparently his eyes burning a hole in the side of her head was low down on her priority list.
"Which means my finder's fee also applies."
Ah, that was more like the Thena he knew. He chuckled, soaking up the sun, both for the warmth and in hopes it would help dry out his clothing. It was stuck to him like a second skin. He would worry about Thena, but her raiding outfits tended to stick to her like a second skin already.
Not that he had noticed.
"I can always go back for it."
He laughed more fully, even though his lungs still ached a little. She elbowed him for it this time, and damn her elbows were pointier than his. But he let it slide, given how she did forsake a great treasure to save him. "No racing this time."
"It was never a race," she rolled her eyes at him. "And if it were, I had beaten you anyway."
Ah, Thena never changed. And he kind of didn't want her to.
#Thenamesh Tomb Raider AU#I give the people what they want!!!#I hope you don't mind I'm continuing on that other prompt I had#I did my homework!#I watched the movies#tried to get a sense of her character#I like the idea of Gil being another freelancer#and the poor guy is constantly losing contracts because the Tomb Raider got here first#meanwhile he's like Thena please some of us have bills to pay#she looks at him like yes my house is huge it has many bills#They drag themselves to basecamp#Gil is like so I did find it...and now it's gone#they're like the fuck bro#but Thena glares at them like A MAN ALMOST DIED#she lays right into 'em because she doesn't give a flying fuck about these old bastards and what they think of her#Gilgamesh admits to himself that he's a little moved#not just that Thena doesn't want him dead#but that she would feel strongly enough to yell about it?#he thinks yelling is her love language#also he does send her a card#and flowers#and it thanks her for saving his life#and he draws a little 'x' to “return the kiss”#Karun and Druig back at the estate are like exCUSE ME???#Thena: *throwing the whole bouquet into the fire* it's nothing#pt 2
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Regarding the recent post:
Killer Queen is too short ranged of a stand to affect most sleuths and it's not in Kira's character to drop Sheer Heart Attack at the police departament and hope.
Kira generally doesn't have many ways to deal with characters that:
Work in teams.
Work from far away.
Have any sort of records showing that they're invastigating him.
The man had to be bailed out by Bites the Dust and still lost
Most sleuths wouldn't even let Kira get away for long enough for him to aquire Bites the Dust so that's not even something to consider in most of these cases.
{But you're really ignoring one thing: It can't be detected by anyone but Stand Users. Why would they think they needed to investigate Yoshikage Kira specifically? There's no evidence of the killings, since in canon, even the police didn't try to investigate the mysterious disappearances. The sleuths would mostly not be able to understand that Killer Queen exists, and even if they assumed it was something supernatural, there's still no evidence. And the man managed to impersonate another man in front of his family, landlord, coworkers, and everyone who may have talked to Kosaku on the street, with only the man's child catching on. Had Hayato never thought to set up a camera in his parents' room, Kira would have never been caught at all. And Kira doing poorly against teams of people investigating him doesn't line up when he's gotten away from them twice (he would have escaped Jotaro and Koichi were it not for Act III, and he did escape the entire Duwang Gang when they were chasing him by severing his own hand), plus managing to keep his identity secret from EVERYONE except Hayato until the kid figured out how to use the time-loop to his advantage. You're right that most of the time Killer Queen wouldn't get to Bites the Dust, but it would be because Kira wouldn't need to. He has eliminated people in broad daylight before, and he could do so again when against someone who can't see Stands.}
#ooc response#not a poll#I'm genuinely a little pissed at the idea that Kira isn't terrifying in his own right#He was an uncaught serial killer even before he got his Stand#He was undetected until Rohan met Reimi#and would have continued being undetected if a literal ghost of his first victim hadn't been there#The man can blow you up#he can turn your watch into a bomb#he can turn your clothes into a bomb#He can create a bomb that will track you as long as you're the warmest thing in the room#And will likely do so if given the opportunity#There are multiple scenarios outside of BtD where if the heroes hadn't been as quick-thibking they would've died#Josuke and the dead man-guided air bubbles#Koichi and his distraction against Sheer Heart Attack#Josuke if Okuyasu hadn't come back to life#Okuyasu if Hayato hadn't sacrificed himself#Hayato if Josuke hadn't used Crazy Diamond at the perfect time#THE ENTIRE DIU CAST IF HAYATO HADN'T THOUGHT TO CALL JOSUKE#Kira is intelligent#Kira is subtle#And Kira could have won#Thank you for coming to my ted talk#And please stop suggesting that Kira would lose against Ordinary Goddamn People#rant post#ranting in the tags#killer queen#yoshikage kira#sorry for using you as an example anon but this has been annoying me and I needed to go for the throat
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The theory that it's Future!Emmet who's possessing emmet means that Future!Emmet got so off rails that he no longer ACTS like himself : he lost himself completely, not even his own brother recognize him. He can pretend, he can act, but there's always something in his manerisms that just isnt right, something he lost that he can never perfect, that Ingo will always notice
haha this is emotionally devastating :)
#can you believe if this was actually true like your brother is missing for years wrecking you emotionally and mentally as you try to#find him not knowing that it’s impossible to do so and so you just spend your time chasing dead end leads and trying to keep yourself sane#and the finally you actually do find him but he’s dead he’s dead he’s been dead for years#so you decide to fight fate and grab it by the neck and go back in time to prevent this from ever happening and it works! you find him!!!#but you can’t#even enjoy it because you’re not HIS brother just as he is not yours#but you’re still desperate to pretend that he is bc the thought of being alone again is terrifying#emmet has always had ingo so when he actually loses him a part of himself was lost with him#a two car train decoupled#his brothers dissaperance changed him so much at a fundamental level#he’s become so twisted that his ‘joking’ with ingo and him actually causing his brother pain is something amusing to him#like a sibling trying to make the other upset for laughs#it’s funny isn’t it brother!#he can’t see that this is killing ingo hurting him deeply bc he’s so fucking deranged#I love it#possession au#ask#angst
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GUYS HELP A JEDI!BATFAM AU SNUCK INTO MY HOUSE AND KICKED THE SHIT OUT OF ME LAST NIGHT
#me: haha what if batfam and star wars#my brain: ... plot#me: oh no#i even have the timeline already figured out#bruce used to be a jedi who was sorta outcast for being a little ruthless#he never wanted to take on a padawan#but then dicks master dies and bruce who also lost his master as a Padawan sees himself in dick and takes him in#this is around when anakin is taken in too#so like years pass and eventually dick graduates to knighthood#and then bruce finde a force sensitive street urchin and bahm he decides Padawan number 2#then the clone wars starts#he trains jason until he tragically loses jason in a sepratist battle#he thinks Jason is dead but jason is actually captured by the separatists#bruce takes on tim because Tims master was feeling overwhelmed by the war and raising a Padawan and tim begged bruce to take him on even tho#bruce decided no more padawans#he reluctantly takes on tim and trains him until order 66#order 66 is given in their venator and dick is present for that mission#its a jfo situation where bruce dies helping dick and tim escape#tim believes Bruce isnt dead and wants to find him while dick just wants to find a safe place for them to hide on the planet they crashed on#dick eventually kinda picks up tims training but everything changes when thalia (possibly a separatist force user?) shows up and reveals#damian. she doesn't think its safe to raise him as hes force sensitive anymore and gives him to dick#eventually theyre hunted by inquisitors and GUESS WHO THE INQUISITOR IS#is Jason :3#eventually they manage to convince jason to leave the inquisition#soon it becomes a jedi knite a padawan a untrained force sensitive and a former Inquisitor take on the empire#jin rambles#i lost sleep over this
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Everything ok buddy I keep seeing gifs of that blue haired guy getting strangled
NO EVERYTHING IS WRONG EVER
#😭😭😭 Thanks for asking??#I never get asks from you guys it's nice 🥺🥺#But genuinely uhmmm#There's this idol scifi horror series on YouTube called Alien Stage#And the premise is like.#Aliens keep human beings as pets and some are signed up onto this competition to outsing each other#And whoever loses dies#And today's episode the guy who's been in love with this other guy since they were kids sabotaged himself and let himself die 😭#So I'm absolutely emotionally wrecked#IT WAS UNREQUITED LOVE TOO#God I can't wait to see how Tills doing next time we see him he didn't even KNOWWWW but now he knows#And Ivan's fucking dead he'll never know how Till feels knowing Ivan was in love with him#Ivan you drive me insane nobody understands you like I do. Little freaky guy.
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I'm not really a fan of Hawks losing his Quirk to AfO. If it serves any purpose it will probably be used to help Izuku fight AfO in the vestige realm which is a fight I was never looking forward to in the first place. Otherwise I don't think it really serves much purpose for Hawks as a character because we're at the end of the story and we just won't get a big focus on how it effects him going forward.
I mean, I see people saying that him losing his Quirk has set him free from the HPSC but he was essentially free from them after the first War. They have been non-existent in the story since than besides passing mentions. From what the reports said last chapter it seems that all the Heroes fighting are doing so of their own pure desire to help, not because the HPSC is paying them or anything. Keigo isn't working for them and given the world ending stakes if he wanted to do anything but beat AfO it'd be a negative trait, not him finding his freedom.
I know people want Keigo to find himself outside of being a Hero and his Quirk but that doesn't really seem to be a theme in the story. If Hori wanted to tell that story he could have done so with Mirio or All Might but he didn't. Instead Mirio was given his Quirk back with little fan fair and All Might's inspiration and Hero heart was reinforced. The story is about people being Heroes not about themselves as just people.
Which is honestly how I see things going with Hawks. His Quirk will be a force for good that helps Izuku beat AfO from the inside proving that despite his saying his Quirk was dirty, he really did/does have the heart of a Hero.
Also, I do think it takes real Hawks out of the story most likely, which is a bit disappointing, though understandable. I never really understood where people got the idea he was going to have a full mental break down anyway and besides him flipping out because he can't help anymore I still don't really see it happening. I mean, Hori is going at light speed here, why would he take the time to focus on Hawks having a mental break when he hasn't even managed to do that for his main three villains yet, who actually need that for the story to end.
I could easily be proven wrong given that Hori's writing is unpredictable, but for the moment my guess is that Hori did this so he could take Hawks out of the fight so he wouldn't get involved with the Todoroki or Ochako/Toga stuff, while also leaving open the possibility to give Izuku a strong ally in Hawks Quirk if needed.
I know people wanted him in those fights, but Hori has a hard time juggling characters in fight scenes, something we've seen a lot in this arc and the one prior. And to be honest he doesn't serve much purpose in them either. I've seen theories of wanting him try and kill Dabi and being devastated because Enji saves his son, essentially picking Touya over him, but Hawks has been nothing but positive about Enji trying to change and help his family. He didn't try and attack Touya or even mention him when he came through the portal, so don't know why he'd suddenly decide to attack him Quirk or not.
When it comes to Toga/Ochako thing he only complicates it. Yes, he killed Twice, but as we've seen Toga's main problem isn't that Twice was killed, it's that Izuku and Ochako, kids around her age don't like her. She feels like no one cares about her because she has a bad Quirk. If getting revenge for Twice was her main objective than she wouldn't have been crying. She doesn't even think about Hawks or name dropped him to my knowledge. If anything she treats all Heroes as guilty. To add Hawks into this fight draws attention away from Ochako, Toga and her main issue of identity. Plus, again I don't see Hawks being upset if Ochako saves Toga in the way he couldn't save Twice. He liked Twice and did try to save him. At most I think we'd see him watching with a happy smile and some tears, not having a full existential crisis.
#bnha spoilers#bnha 385#bnha Hawks#keigo tamaki#i admit I'm bias in this because the idea that Hawks having to lose his wings to find himself feels a bit gross#like Quirks are shown to be a big part of a person#and he is essentially losing body parts#why can't he just get to enjoy his Quirk outside of being in the HPSC?#it's like if you let a bird out of it's cage but them ripped off it's wings#that's not really any better#and I also don't really want him to have some crisis either#the one caused by Enji makes no sense given he praises Enji for trying to fix things with his family#so idk why he'd suddenly be shocked that Enji wouldn't want his son dead#and although it'd make more sense with the Toga/Twice stuff#I still don't see why it'd end up with him having a mind break#crying tears of joy sure#admitting to Toga he shouldn't have killed Twice maybe#getting a full on mental break down where he screams and cries because he's realized he was the biggest bad#I don't really see#again part of that is bias because Hori made the stakes to high and his villains to eager to murder all of Japan#that it's hard to see Hawks as fully wrong for killing Twice#but also i don't see Hori spending the pages when he already has so much to wrap up#and a lot of those are way more pressing than Hawks having a midlife crisis
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Girl like. The reason he said "this is how it should be" and faced death with a smile....is cuz he wanted to die. For 2 years he sat there thinking he was worthless and deserved to die. If he hadn’t be shot, his death would’ve been suicide, he was fully planning to die in a gutter somewhere undetected. When saying "this is how it should be" hes literally saying "don’t cry because I’m dying, my death is a good thing actually because I fucking suck and you are better off without me". I don’t think that’s badass even slightly, it’s actually really sad and really shitty. Shinjiro is so convinced that he deserves to die and hates the idea of anyone giving a shit about him because he literally can’t wrap his mind around the idea that he will be missed when he’s gone, that his death is a bad thing actually. And his last words were meant to be comforting because he fully did not intend for anyone to be there when he died, he intended to die alone, so he says them as a reminder that he’s not worth crying over
Personally, if it were me, if I was holding my dying best friend in my arms who was deeply depressed and suicidal and he said "this is how it should be" uh. I wouldn’t admire him for it??? Like am I losing my mind when I say the way this game handles Shinji is bad or is anyone else seeing this too 😰
#its like okay listen i understand the basic math of any persona game they say things and everything they say is actually#very bad when you think about it for more than 3 seconds#like what theyre intending to do with the death of this character is be like oh no your sad friend dies tragically thats so saddddd#but that doesnt mean you cant live a wonderful life full of meaning you cant let grief consume you life is beautiful awagga#and i guess shinji is a specific character whos used cuz i guess its more tragic that he never realized he was worthy of life and shit#and i guess its also like ‘dont be like this guy who let grief consume him and then died you gotta Be Different’#which i dont. love. that last part cuz if you think about shinji and what led him down this road#its like. of course hes depressed! he accidentally killed a woman with a child when he was 16!#he himself is an orphan and he just made some other kid an orphan as well and it happened cuz his persona went out of control#which very much can translate to ‘this must mean im dangerous and can hurt everyone if im not kept under control’#so of course he isolated himself and believed he was evil and became suicidal like who wouldnt feel that way#like am i supposed to be mad he left sees and took drugs cuz uh while i dont think isolation or Evil Drug is good for his mental health#i dont think him continuing to fight in sees is something he can just easily do again given how he killed someone like he shouldnt have to#be a part of this thing anymore like how would he even safely get castor to not do that??? he cant kill more people on accident!#so yeah like using shinji as an example of bad coping mechanisms is already just. a big fucking oof to me like it just feels like the game#is saying he shouldve gotten over it and simply not be suicidal and stayed on the team. idk if thats the intent but uh it wouldnt faze me#cuz persona games are notoriously awful at writing characters who are traumatized and abused#but what makes everything even worse is how the game kinda like. acts like shinjis death is a stepping stone#like we’re supposed to use it as a wake up call and understand the stakes but keep going on anyways#and akihiko and Ken get. ‘great character development’ according to the game telling you they have now developed#but damn all akihiko is is just repressed he cries for 3 seconds and then is like I SHOULD MAN UP and then neglects a depressed child#shinjis dying words are words to live by now even though they piss me the fuck off like girl am i crazy HES FUCKING#HES TELLING ME NOT TO CRY OVER HIM BECAUSE HE SHOULD BE DEAD ACTUALLY AND THIS IS A GOOD THING ACTUALLY#like if the game wants us to still find meaning in life despite losing someone it just really hurts that shinji has to die for that to work#apparently. cuz the character i see myself in is shinji. not some perfect prettyboy who does everything perfectly and has 4 gfs#his death seems like a punishment for bad behavior. the bad behavior being of course depression and drug use. and im simply supposed to be#better than that if i want to live. and we dont get to form a connection with him cuz thats gayyyyy#and his death is like a NOBLE HEROIC SACRIFICE idk its just such bullshit to me i hate it so bad#how is killing a suicidal guy and then treating it as admirable that he said ‘this is how it should be’ supposed to make me feel#makes me feel sick personally and it ruins the entire game’s theme to me because its fucking shallow and the story is bad and im tired
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i actually like ballas as an antagonist. hes believable. hes just some guy some fuckin nepo baby. whatever the orokin equivalent of a tech ceo was. this guy was like space roman apple guy. i want to put him in a jar and study him like a bug.
#It Speaks#he put himself in a position to get leashed up and chimerafied just to gain power. i want to think too long and hard about this#what would bring a man to do that#a woman? it was a woman. but not her as a person. an immitation would do. a doll? a doll.#but then these children who love their wire mother so so much show up. half dead void devils. vile beings.#to him at least#and ballas never learned to share. but he doesnt realize that. he lets her have her corpse children. or so he thinks.#but these children are affected by his resentment. and so does the flesh mother. she hides them away like dionysus in the ivy.#he sees this act. he sees betrayal. use of love meant for him used on these... things.....#so he plunges himself into a self defeating chain of events. loses his wife. his empire. his legacy nothing but war. defeat and extinction.#but he cannot exterminate what has been recrafted and sent back by forces greater than himself.#is that not why he hates them? the fact that THEY were blessed? they were LOVED? but not him?#but instead of moving forward he kept gripping the past. harder and harder until it too shattered under his cruel grip.#i just think hes neat
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was just having a casual thought abt how both swanfire and jamieclaire have their big reunion (or for sf their second big reunion) in the 6th ep of the 3rd season as i do from time to time and then accidentally started thinking abt the similarities/parallels of those separations and reunions and now im spiraling send help
#teresa talks#the separation being at the hands of a magic portal to a diff land/time#neal forcing emma to stay and letting himself fall (to his death supposedly) bc their son needs her#and emma begging him not to bc she loves him and doesn’t want to lose him#jamie making claire go thru for the safety of their child while he stays behind to die (supposedly)#and claire begging him not to make her bc she can’t bear to be parted from him#emma and claire walking away from this believing their respective partners are dead#jamie and neal ultimately surviving and knowing their respective partners are out there#and then emma and claire later finding out from someone that their partners have in fact survived and they can get back to them#and the reunion that follows that#even tho the reunions are VERY different situations with very different feelings surrounding them#but also it’s still a reunion between two people who love each other and one party thought the other was dead#(and like the sf reunion doesn’t have the weight of the time gap reunion but it is still a thought you were dead reunion)#anyways. if u see me make a gifset abt this just mind ur business it’s fine#3x06 reunion ep supremacy
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the brainrot is so bad that i'm sitting here trying to watch the godfather just thinking to myself "damn..... how can i make a byIer au outta dis... 🤔📝"
#karen's actress is italian... maybe karen is too... she's a civilian but mike gets roped into it bc ted is more involved as an accountant.#her family loves him and ted loves money and being able to provide for his family and all that Macho Family Man^tm stuff and#sure karen wants mike to do big things—bigger than just messing around with his friends—but she isn't sure that having him get#chummy with her family is the right idea. mike does it anyway bc it's what he's Supposed To Do and he's Getting Older and karen#thinks well... okay... if this is what you want... ❤️ and mike just nods and agrees like he always does bc thts easier than speaking up#or trying to figure out what the hell to do after uni and Much less scary than working on that book he's been working on since forever.#will's a civilian ofc he gets brought along to mike's family things bc mike wants the company but he doesn't Like that world and the#way they look at him. whenever lonnie used to get fired from whatever job he was working at then he'd end up doing ''favors''#for one of the other families and even though will's nothing like his father and he and his brother and his mom aren't even remotely#involved in that kind of life he still has his last name and it's a brand tht sticks. smth smth the romeo n juliet vibes of it all....#in this au maybe hopper hasn't been reformed bc there's no tragedy to pull him out of that so maybe he's on the wheelers' payroll#and he has a daughter tht they want to introduce to mike... smth smth mike going to will's apartment in the dead of night to get#patched up.. smth smth mike taking el to things instead of will.. smth smth will and mike getting into A Big Fight bc will doesn't#want to see mike continue to get hurt or lose himself in this world and become this person that he doesn't even recognize anymore#and mike starts goading him like oh why do you care so much huh blahblah and they've been dancing around this all their lives#but it finally comes out and it doesn't fix anything bc will doesn't want This mike and mike can't stand the way will looks at him now and#will storms out after having said the unspeakable.. goes somewhere and gets caught in the crossfire.. cue the body pulled from the quarry#parallel when el calls him immediately after she finds out from hopper and there's a horrible few hours where they don't kno if will's#gonna pull thru. he does ofc much to their surprise.. wake up calls n apologies are eventually had... hurt/comfort ensues.. mike talks#to karen and opens up for the first time ever bc they've gotten closer now.. smth smth um . gay people 🫶#mike in suits n gloves + will learning to not ask questions + el seeing tht will's apartment looks more like it's will-And-mike's#apartment bc there's so much of him and his things there and he always walks in n moves around like he owns the place +#will's hands shaking as he tries to tend to mike and he manages to keep it together until mike's all patched up but when he turns around#to clean up his shoulders are shaking and mike jus comes up behind him n hugs him through it bc he knows this hurts will more than it hurts#him (which is saying smth bc mike's blood is literally all over will's hands n dinner table rn so like)#SOOOOO self-indulgent but idc im free . (<- said thru gritted teeth and while closing my eyes so i don't have 2 look at this post)#also i say brainrot but i think tht has bad connotations now. i am just an Enjoyer a Lover a Scholar an Enthusiast one might even say..#mine
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I do need to add a little note to the "hes not a fan of kurt that twink annoys him thing" which is that in one verse they are in love with each other and dating but the twink still annoys him at the start bc his parents r hunters and theres a Lot going on there but he fucks kurt and then falls for him so. hes not a fan. The twink annoys him. He is also in love with the twink
#hes in love with kurt but also. shot kurt in the head one time bc he Had To#and then turned kurt to save kurts life despite knowing kurt didnt wanna be a werewolf#and while he Did save kurt there was. a Long While that kurt was very upset and wouldnt even look at liam#bc being raised the way he was by hunter parents and having the intense conditioning he had#theres a very. its a very complicated thing for him to be a werewolf#especially bc his parents are More Likely to kill him that way (and Boy do they try)#forgot how much liam and kurt go thru when mia and i wild out. forgot ab kurts intense hallucinations after theo died#or ''died'' bc he wasnt dead but kurt didnt know that#and just the. the way he entirely lost himself and liam had to deal w his own grief ab losing a mate while trying to. keep kurt together#god it makes me emotional actually
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jjk spoilers for manga leaks under the cut and in the tags .....
ik its too soon to speak but... im excited to see a post gojo jjk world... i think its too early to call it good or bad writing but me personally? i think gojo dying makes for more interesting possibilities for the rest of that cast and their growth and development as characters
#jjk leaks#jjk spoilers#all of this depends on how the rest of the storie goes of course#we wont rlly know how everything will end up until jjk ends#but like. i WANTED gojo to die#something something gojo being born into the world made it unbalanced and only him dying will restore balance something something#which is funny bc him dying actually shakes things up so much#pre gojo sealing he was there sort of as a safety net as the strongest#even tho his title never meant anything bc he didnt really save anybody or anything#but then post gojo sealing the cast has one goal of freeing gojo#all of these expectations on one guy who they deem the strongest even tho the strength doesnt mean anything#which cant rlly sink in unless he. yknow. dies#OR loses his infinity or six eyes but too late he died#and now that their safety net/strongest sorcerer isnt there. what'll they do?#everybody needs to take a step back and reevaluate and realize they cant keep relying on him#hell even gojo wanted everyone to get to a point where they didnt need to rely on him#to not rely on one singular person for all their troubles and their fucked up system#a system that gojo WAS a part of and didnt dismantle himself because he got benefit from that system#he killed the higher ups and now hes dead too#or well. the jurys still out on who killed the higher ups. but theyre all dead and so is gojo#what now? u dont have ur strongest anymore! r u gonna cling on to the system that created this in the first place? or will u forge something#new. somwthing better. something that doesnt beget an endless cycle of destruction and death and loss of innocent lives#also. karma for gojo thinking the solution to their problems could be another fight#oh u think the solution to this cycle of violence is another big fight where all u need to do is win?#idiot. get cut in half.#u want to make jujutsu society better but given the choice of saving the new generation (megumi) or fighting the strongest sorcer of the#heian era. u choose fighting the strongest sorcerer#like u had a month surely u couldve come up w a plan that involved putting megumi first and finding a way to save him#and (as far as i can tell) everybody went with it!!! bc theyre all in the system and cant see past it to make alternatives!!!#well now gojo is DEAD! u better start finding some alternatives
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like idk. i miss seeing content from s.igne (though i respect gab wholeheartedly). i miss fanart from my favorite artists. i miss older eras of j.se at times (and yes, there were older eras, the way people pretended he Never Changed is just weird). i miss old anti designs. i miss the old fic trends. i miss having a very active fandom (though i am so happy to see the new arrivals) and i miss seeing him interact with fans the way he did on tumblr back in the day. i miss the way i used to interact with some of the blogs here before i decided to fuckin,,, wage holy war and make enemies out of them (joking, but i have seen sides to some of these people that i wish i could tear out of my memory). i miss feeling confident that i could trust the good intentions of people here and even the big man himself (not god. that makes sean sound like god. you know what i mean). i miss when some of you weren't so fucking bitter which is funny because i'm the bitterest bitch alive. idk. i don't think it's bad to miss any of these things because i'm not going to be an ass and act like it's anybody's fault. i'm not going to be bothered by gab for being happy because i'm glad she is happy, and i'm not going to get bothered by sean taking a reasonable step back from this hellsite when people were cruel to him, and i'm not going to get mad at trends for changing because that is how time works. but i do miss things and i know its cringe and parasocial and perhaps even problematic but i hate having to pretend like i never have Any feelings about the past lest i break a hypothetical rule of what is the Normal level of attachment to an online community. okay. i think i'm done now.
#one of my favorite writers left because they couldn't deal anymore and one of my favorite writers turned out to have shit views and one of#my favorite writers left because of something that was partly my fault and one of my favorite writers stopped writing because of two of the#others and one of my favorite writers hurt someone i love over and over and over and one of my favorite writers left because they were the#someone i love. two of the big names hate queer folk that don't align with their ideals and half the artists left for twitter or for dead.#the man himself left because criticism always becomes cruelty and people lie to make themselves feel good.#the editors all turned their accounts private and my favorite told me on livestream that i was good and starting somewhere but then forgot#my name. and i thought maybe i was the bitter one but then i look at some of the other people who have been here so long and wonder why#they even bother anymore because they care more about complaining with everything j.ack does than anyone who actually enjoys his stuff.#and you know i poked fun at *** for a lot of things. some deserved some not. and one of them was the fact that she compared fandom#to warfare. and yes that's still silly i don't think it's a fair comparison but i do know that she wasn't fully wrong.#when you've been here for a long time and ive Been here for a long time you start to get really used to names and faces#and the change can be like waking up to a new wallpaper in your room. not a bad one just a new one.#i don't want to pretend that this fandom is just a silly little hobby for me when lets be honest i know some of yalls personal lives a#little too dearly for that. ive loved people here ive lost people here the first person who showed me this place fucking DIED and i still#lose it sometimes over the fact that he would have loved jameson so much and we couldve been closer friends had he stayed alive a few more#years. so yeah. sorry for being fucking cringy or whatever but there have been times where i've felt like im on a sinking ship watching#everybody else row away and i refuse to go. so like. cool. cool. im glad things are good again but i never really got to process the bad#things.
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i have been trying to write lately and it's been insubstantial but of course I get struck by absolutely random inspiration at work huh
#crow.txt#kaeluc#genshin#snippets#angst#have i even USED that tag#sfw#god i just very much love the idea of kaeya (with diluc ONLY cause hes not telling anyone else) just like#happening to think of Everything and flippantly go haha crazy how things work right?#and for diluc to look him dead in the eye (figuratively at least unless/until i change stuff around here) and go#no thats actually extremely fucked up that you were subjected to that. its not right and it should never have happened much less to a child#possibly even going so far as to flat out say kaeya is stronger than he ever could be because he cant fathom how he would ever live with it#if it had happened to him instead#and kaeya having an extremely strong moment of oh. he's right huh.#like sure hes probably had the thought himself but there was nobody he could TELL and have it AFFIRMED for him that hes not being selfish#to not want to have to live with something like that#and for it to be DILUC that tells him? OUT LOUD? directly indelicately (toward everyone else not kaeya) and not mincing words at ALL?#indelicate isnt quite the word but yknow. zero regard for whoever thought it was okay to do that#like just KILL ME at that point. im already fucking dying#absolutely losing my mind over this#imagine!! the relief!!!! he cant change it sure BUT at least he FINALLY fucking has someone go thats fucked up and youre allowed to hate it#kaeya being flippant abt his own trauma is going to Fucking Kill Me.#over a week since ive posted something decent. shameful smh. idk if theres anything else worth sharing yet tho..#i just need kaeya to be told that it WASNT his fault and hes NOT inherently irredeemably horrible forever because of shitty circumstances#or else i will fucking explode cartoonishly like a water balloon full of red paint#grabbing his shoulders and shaking him like a ragdoll. its fucked up and you dont have to laugh it off all the time I Promise.
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