#like why did she poke that man in the ass with a pitchfork in the magic shop. whats wrong with her. i want to be her | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thechaoticdruid · 3 months

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[The Monster Hunter]

Plot: Another draft from my abandoned long fic. It takes place right before [The Bite Scene]. Basically, it's the encounter between Astarion and Gandrel rewritten to feature my Tav, Winnie. Just thought I'd share it.

C/w: Death, dead animal, Astarion being a bigot, Astarion being a manipulative little shit, dialogue straight outta the game. A wee bit of blood.

Truth be told it was hard to remember how any of this happened. One moment Winnie was on the streets of Baldur's Gate searching for her friend Arva after she and the other members of their gang had gone missing and the next the human was kidnapped by tentacle faced freaks, and infected with a brain worm before crashing from the sky in an alien spaceship. It's been a complete and utter nightmare and the only saving grace would be the fact that She'd been able to make some allies in the process.

"Dead pig. Yep that pig is dead." Winnie called out, her fuchsia colored eyes scanning over an oddly well intact corpse of a boar. "Weird….I don't see any wounds." Cautiously she poked it with her foot.

"Well, do you expect it to come back to life if you poke it enough?" Winnie’s elven companion Astarion, rolled his eyes, "just leave it. You're wasting our time prodding at a carcass."

The human female sighed, but just as she was about to walk off two small puncture wounds in the boar's neck caught her attention. The first rational assumption that came to mind was that perhaps a snake had bitten into the pig and poisoned it. But surely there would have been a trace of blood left by bite, wouldn't there?

"Darling, let's go. The brain worms aren't going to wait patiently for you to gawk at every corpse we pass." The elf huffed.

Deciding it was probably just best to move on, Winnie nodded and followed. Whatever happened to this pig was probably not important for them to worry about, surely. Continuing on, Winnie and her companions wandered off into a nearby forest as they searched for the creche that their gith friend Lae'zel kept insisting they find.

Winnie trudges through the mud, blowing brown curls out of her eyes before suddenly feeling a sharp sting in the side of her face.

"Ah! Godsdamn mosquitoes!" She cursed, slapping her cheek before swatting around, frantically. "Why the hells do they keep biting me!?"

"Looks like they have a taste for you, Winnie." Shadowheart teased.

"Why me? There are plenty of other people here to bite!"

"And here I thought druids were friends of nature." Gale chimed in.

"I'm friends with nature….Until it starts biting me in the ass." Winnie muttered.

"You must be quite the delicacy, given the swarm you're attracting…" Astarion smirked slightly, his eyes lingered upon the druid longer than he normally did. Winnie assumed he was enjoying her suffering. (The sadistic little shit.) Though she completely missed the hungry look in his eyes and just groaned in response, unable to resist scratching the irritated skin. Before anything else could be said there was a shouting off in the distance.

"Tell us where she is!" The voice of a man was heard.

"I told you both already I haven't laid eyes on your sister!" Winnie’s eyes blinked as she'd heard a familiar voice. It was an old woman they'd met in the Druid's Grove. She'd told Astarion and Winnie that she might be able to help with their tadpole problem. Winnie wasn't exactly sure if the old gal would actually be able to help them or if she was just demented like Astarion said. They hadn't promised anything when she invited the adventurers to visit her home, but Winnie did say they might stop by if given the chance. However, now things may be a little difficult.

The old woman appeared to be cornered down the hill. Two men had a pitchfork and torch and appeared to be harassing her. As quickly as she could the druid intercepted the scene.

"What's going on here?" Winnie asked in a stern tone, preparing to grab her staff if need be.

"Thank goodness you came sweetie! I have no idea what's come over these boys!"

"Shut it hag! We know you were the last to see Mayrina! Now where is she!?" One of the men growled.

"I already told ya, I haven't laid eyes on your poor sister. I will gladly help you look for her though." Ethel insisted.

"Enough! Tell us where she is right now!" The older of the two brothers raised his weapon up.

"Okay let's not do anything we'll regret. Leave the lady alone." Winnie stepped in, shooting a glare at the two men. She put her hand on her staff, gripping it tight.

“Sweetie be careful!” Auntie Ethel shouted.

“She's with the hag! Get her!” Without another word the two men attacked. Winnie quickly used her staff to block an incoming pitchfork, knocking it out of the way and then quickly smacking both of the brothers in the head. The two dropped to the ground, unconscious.

“Oh dear, I never meant for this to happen.” Ethel exclaimed looking over at the brothers.

“Can you please explain what is going on?”Winnie asked, eyes scanning the woman up and down. Something was off about her. Despite her seeming to show guilt and concern for the two men there was something in her tone that sounded off, insincere.

“It's their sister Mayrina, she's staying with me and she made me promise not to breathe a word about it to anyone. Oh, I do hope the poor boys will be alright…” Auntie Ethel said.

“I'm sure they'll be fine…Well….They probably won't die.” Winnie said with a nervous little cough as she looked at the two boys. Gods, she hoped she didn't accidentally kill them. Sure, they had acted like idiots, but it was clear that it was out of concern for their sister.

“Well, I can't dally around any longer, I best be going, but please stop by my house. I'd like to thank you proper.” Ethel had an all too sickeningly sweet smile before suddenly vanishing into a puff of smoke. A look of shock covered the young druid’s face as she began to think that perhaps Ethel wasn't the sweet innocent old woman she had claimed to be.

“Shit…” She cursed.

“I haven't spent much time around helpless old ladies, but was that normal?” Astarion asked, stepping beside Winnie.

“Ah….Well…My grandmother was able to turn into an owlbear at will…but I feel like this may be something else entirely.” Winnie replied, scratching the back of her head.

“Hag was the word the brothers used to describe her. If they're right, then we may have a very dangerous foe on our hands.” Gale added.

“Usually l’d say we shouldn't jump to conclusions, but this was very suspicious.” Winnie said before looking off towards the wetlands below the hill.

She began to walk down, the others slowly following, Her leather boots sank into the mud as she surveyed the area, spying a few sheep roaming around nearby. It looked pleasant enough, but something just wasn't right. There was this gut feeling that it was some kind of illusion at work. After a moment Winnie attempted to use some magic to dispel it.

Within seconds the beautiful wetlands turned into a disgusting and dreary looking bog.

“Oh…Well this is just wonderful…”Astarion murmured. Winnie huffed as the group walked off through the bog, ankle deep in mud and gods know what else. Gale kept his robes hiked up and Astarion seemed to be muttering something about his boots. Shadowheart rolled her eyes at the two of them. Venturing further on Winnie began to notice the sheep from before had vanished and were now replaced by angry looking redcaps. Many of them apparently making…..sheep noises.

“Baaa!” One said as they noticed Winnie starring.

“Uh…..Baaa?” She mimicked it, eliciting a chuckle from both Astarion and Shadowheart. The redcap glared at Winnie before waddling away.

The adventurers kept wandering through the bog, searching around for any sign of Ethel before eventually stumbling upon a disgustingly sweet smell and a man standing up ahead. He had long brown hair, a beard and a scar under one of his eyes. On his back appeared to be a crossbow and a very nice looking one at that.

“Ah stranger, forgive the aroma!” The man says as the sickening odor causes Winnie to grimace slightly.

“It's powdered ironvine. It'll make any monsters think twice before trying to make a meal of me.”

Winnie was about to introduce herself before suddenly Astarion cut in.

“You're a monster hunter? I'm surprised. I thought all Gur were vagrant cutthroats.”

“Don't be rude.” The druid scolded him then glanced back at the hunter apologetically, “forgive him. The elf doesn't know when to stop talking.”

“You should listen to your companion. Next he'll warn you that my people can curse your cow to give only sour milk or seduce your daughter to a life of roaming. I wish I had half the power settled folk think my people possess. Alas I am a simple wanderer. A simple wanderer and monster hunter. But I'm no witch doctor or cutthroat.”

“And what monster are you hunting exactly?” Winnie inquired.

“Something terrifying no doubt. Dragon? Cyclops? Kobold?” Astarion said, in a mocking tone.

“Nothing so dramatic. I'm hunting a vampire spawn.” The hunter replied.

“A vampire!?” The brunette haired druid’s eyes lit up at the statement. Her lips curled up into a giddy grin. “This sounds exciting! I've never had the opportunity to encounter one before!”

“I’d exercise caution friend, these creatures are not something you'd want to encounter unprepared. Nor are they as charming as the stories make them out to be.”

“Oh, I know they’re dangerous. I'm just very fascinated with monsters is all…” Winnie gave a shy chuckle. She seemed absolutely thrilled at the prospect of meeting a creature of the night. Her elven companion however immediately tensed.

“So, why are you hunting this vampire spawn?” He asked, his voice was laced with curiosity, but his eyes had a look of distress in them.

“You’re asking a monster hunter why he's hunting a monster?” Shadowheart spoke up.

“Why not? All vampires can’t be bad? Can they?” Winnie hummed, her mouth forming a disappointed pout.

“I'm afraid they are. Vampires are godless parasites. There is no reason not to destroy them. But in this case it is a sacred mission from the head of my tribe. My orders are to capture the beast and return it to her.”

“Capture? And bring it where, exactly?” Astarion asked, his eyes seemed trained on the hunter.

“Baldur's Gate. My people wait for me there.” The gur explained. It was then Winnie noticed Astarion’s tension. His hand inched for the dagger sheathed at his side. A fake smile spread across his face.

“You're asking a lot of questions.” She said, turning her head to look at the elf.

“There's a lot to know.” Astarion giggled, feigning innocence before then approaching the hunter, leaving little room between the two. “I've crossed paths with your people before you know.” Astarion suddenly drew his dagger and before Winnie could even speak he jammed it straight through the monster hunter’s eye. “It wasn't a good experience.” He growled

“Astarion, what the hells!?” Shadowheart shouted.

“Was that really necessary!?” Gale called from behind them.

“Please tell me you had a good reason for that.” Winnie asked, looking at Astarion cautiously as he plucked his dagger from the corpse.

“He was spinning a tale and you were falling for it. Vampires? Sacred missions? Pft. Honestly.” Astarion huffed before turning back at me, the hunter’s blood had splattered across his face and was now dripping down the side of his cheek. “He would have followed us to camp and slit our throats in the night. Trust me I did us a favor.”

Winnie glared at him, crossing her arms. This was conflicting. Astarion could be all too stab happy at times, but he had watched her back in several fights since they'd joined up.

“Now if we're done here we have more important things to get on to.” Astarion said as he began to walk off. Winnie turned back to the corpse, deciding she may as well make use of his belongings. Not like he'd be using them anymore anyway. She took his crossbow and some magic arrows he had before following after the others. Gale and Shadowheart appeared to be whispering about whether or not it was wise to keep Astarion in the group after this little incident.

After a while Winnie spoke up, stepping between Astarion and the others.

“You dispatched the monster hunter rather quickly.”

“I know. Wasn't it impressive?” Astarion smirked his eyes looking Winnie over.

“Doesn’t explain why.”

“Don't you worry your pretty little head about why. The gur are duplicitous reprobates. Didn't you see the look he gave you when you mentioned wanting to see a vampire? He was probably going to run you through for it. Claim you were some vampire fanatic. Luckily, you have me to look out for you, you sweet little thing.~” He purred the last few words. Winnie’s cheeks flushed and she mentally cursed. Damn him. Ever since they'd started traveling she'd found herself very attracted to him. Unfortunately he was able to pick up on it quite easily, and take advantage of the soft spot she had for him. “He won't bother us anymore. Now I've made sure of it.”

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slash-em-up · 4 years

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I Was (Not) Born To Be A Cowboy Pt. 2

Last Time:

‘Thank FUCK you’re both here! These ranch-hand bastards are trying to kill me!’

Asa sighed deeply.

“Hello Jesse...”

-------------------------------------------------------------------

You chortled at Jesse’s miserable look. You couldn’t help it.

“Weeelll howdy, partner! Golly, if you ain’t the cutest rootin’est tootin’est lil cow-poke I ever did see!”

Jesse glared at you then looked pleadingly at Asa.

‘Make them stop.’

Asa huffed and moved past you into the bunk house.

“...Oh, to have that power...”

You moved to follow, and judging by the look Jesse was throwing you, if there was a snowbank nearby you’d be tossed in head-first with no hope of rescue.

Thank heaven for little miracles.

Entering the cabin, you couldn’t help the small whimper that left your lips at the shabby conditions.

You’d stayed in a very similar place during camp one awful summer; but that had been summer. This was a frigid Montana winter, and from the looks of it the only source of heat was a wood-burning fireplace which was giving off the world's most pitiful excuse for a glow.

“Really, Jesse?”

You moved quickly to save the fire, re-arranging the logs so they didn’t smother the flame, and adding a few pieces of kindling.

Immediately the cabin brightened, and you smiled.

The aggressive unzipping of a duffle-bag brought your attention back to your partners. One of whom was trying his hardest to loom over poor Brody as he stood awkwardly in the doorway.

“Uh... Hey there Mr. Jesse...”

A stony glare answered him.

“You - uh – you look like you’re all recovered from your tumble this mornin’...”

Now he had Asa and your attention.

“No need to worry... everyone falls off their horse at least once... or four times...”

You were pretty sure you heard Asa mumble an annoyed “Jesus Christ, Jesse...” under his breath before carefully refolding his sweaters and placing them in the bedside cubby.

Under Jesse’s baleful gaze, Brody seemed to determine that it was time to beat a hasty retreat.

“Well, I’ll let you folks get settled!” he gave you a friendly nod and Asa an intimidated “Sir..” before turning to leave the bunkhouse.

“Breakfast’s at four!”

Jesse rubbed at his eye in a beleagured motion as you jumped up from your seat.

“Four?! WAIT... Brody, FOUR AM?!?”

But Brody was gone.

A large arm curled around your shoulders and Jesse gave you a sympathetic squeeze.

‘Welcome to Hell.’

*************************************

These bunks were not made to hold more that one person at a time.

You determined that Mr. Ephriam had to be homophobic. You could almost read the sign ‘No Brokeback Mountain-ing On My Good Cattle Ranch’ and it was about to make you cry.

You were so cold.

And Asa had the audacity to be sleeping like a baby, that bastard.

Jesse looked like he was wearing at least five pairs of socks, because beyond not being anywhere big enough to fit more than one person, the bunks were also clearly not built to hold anyone taller than 6’.

Even Asa was a little smooshed; but somehow he was making due.

Jesse, on the other hand, could almost plant his feet on the floor if he laid flat and he looked miserable.

“Jesse...” you hissed.

The veritable mountain of blankets covering the bunk to your right shifted, allowing a blurry brown eye to peer out questioningly at you.

“Bring your blankets over by the fireplace, I have an idea.”

Jesse seemed to intuit what you were thinking because he speedily shuffled himself and his pile of coverings in front of the fire, laying several down as a barrier between your bodies and the cold wood floor.

You did a shimmy of happiness as you laid down next to Jesse’s reclining body, already feeling the heat from the fire and the large form of your partner saturate your chilled skin.

Sighing in joy, you let Jesse pull you in tightly so he was spooning you, nearly covering you with his own body in his quest for heat.

His chest rose and fell with a deep exhalation as you both settled into a comfortable position for the first time that night.

You were so cozy that the pair of you only barely shifted when, a few minutes later, you heard soft grumbles and movement from the other bunk as Asa rolled to his feet and walked over to join you.

The heat of the two large men caging you in had you nearly purring in delight, and the atmosphere had lightened considerably – enough that moments later Asa jolted up and punched Jesse roughly in the shoulder.

“Hands off my ass.”

Jesse’s chest shook with laughter, and you couldn’t contain your tired giggles if you tried.

A hand rose from it’s resting place on your waist to make a dismissive gesture at Asa before spelling out ‘Thanks you two.’

You turned slightly to press a kiss to Jesse’s scarred chin.

“Anytime.”

Asa grunted in acknowledegement before telling you both in no uncertain terms that you had less than three hours before breakfast and he wanted to sleep – so quiet down.

********************

The loud clanging of a bell woke you from what had turned into a rather pleasant slumber.

“Nooooooo...” you groaned, burying your face into Jesse’s chest.

Asa was already up and sorting through his luggage, looking for his glasses as you and Jesse slowly untangled yourselves from your blanket nest and stumbled over to your own bunks.

“What does one wear to a proper chuck wagon breakfast?” you asked jokingly.

Asa smirked but Jesse was less than amused.

‘I think a gunny sack and fur cap would make you fit in perfectly.’

Apparently, Jesse was not at all impressed with the ranch’s dress code.

You played along.

“Aww and here I left my coonskin cap at home...”

The door to the bunk clattered, allowing Spann to enter.

“I have an extra if you want to make an impression...”

“Hey Spann. Love the flannel.”

It seems that Brody handn’t been exagerrating when he said Spann was settling in to the routine of the ranch. You couldn’t recall ever seeing her dressed so casually; and had NEVER seen her without a full face of makeup and jewelry.

Clearly, she was nothing if not adaptable.

“I see you’re making the best of ranch life.”

She gave you a small grin.

“My mom’s family owned a dairy farm. I was pretty handy with a pitchfork before I moved to Florida.”

“Haha, and I guess it’s just like riding a bike?”

“Something like that.”

Jesse interrupted your joking around with a curt ‘cute’ before huffing past the two of you out onto the porch.

You raised an eyebrow at Spann before following her out the door.

Oh, well that explained why Jesse was in such a mood already...

Two horses waited by a hitching post for their riders to join them.

It was pretty easy to tell who’s was who’s.

Spann’s horse was a beautiful little red thoroughbred – already saddled and waiting for the petite woman to mount and take off towards the mess hall.

Jesse’s was... sized appropriately... you guessed.

The huge draft horse stood untacked, and you could swear it was glaring as Jesse approached it slowly.

Asa joined Spann and you in leaning against the railing, watching the battle about to commence.

“Her name is Sugar...” Spann muttered to the two of you.

“Mr. Cromean’s has fallen off at least twice every day we’ve been here, and he still can’t get his saddle on tight enough...”

You could hear Jesse making clucking noises with his tongue at the huge animal – but you were sure he was simply cussing Sugar out internally.

He’d pulled a large Western-style saddle off the porch railing before approaching the horse, and you watched with amused disbelief as your boyfriend proceeded to charge at Sugar – saddle up – who quickly danced out of reach.

This chase continued for several minuted before Asa shifted away with a snort of disgust, pushing his glasses up his nose before stepping to intercept Jesse as he tore after the prancing horse once more.

“Give that to me, idiot. We’ll be here all day if we wait for you.”

You had to admit, you were a little turned on watching as Asa swiftly took the saddle out of Jesse’s limp grasp before confidently walking over to settle the blanket and leather tack comfortably on Sugar’s back; pressing his thumb lightly into the horse’s flank as he tightened the girth with swift and sure movements.

One final check, and he’d gripped the reigns and mounted.

Jesse’s back was to you; but you could just imagine the mixture of awe and embarrassed anger that was probably plain as day on the tall man’s face.

Asa rolled his eyes, giving a click of his heels into Sugars sides and trotting over to where you stood.

“Ready to go?”

You couldn’t hold back your stupid grin as you nodded quickly, grasping Asa’s offered arm and holding tightly as he swung you from the porch to sit in front of him on the saddle.

“Hold the pommel and grip with your thighs...” he murmurred into your ear.

“Well you know I’m good at that.” you teased.

“Cheeky...”

Asa’s eyes sparkled with a hidden grin as he moved the large horse towards the mess.

“Coming, Spann?”

You nearly let out a hoot of laughter at the sound of boots rushing over to catch the two of you.

Jesse skidded in the muddy ground and jerked back as Sugar moved her head to nip at him.

‘Hey, you stole my horse!’

Asa snorted.

“It didn’t look like you were using it.”

‘It’s a quarter mile to the mess hall do you expect me to walk?!’

“I suppose you could round up a posse and arrest me for horse-thieving; but I think breakfast will be over by then...”

Jesse looked like he was about to start stomping his feet in anger.

‘I hate how much you’re enjoying this.’

You giggled as one of Asa’s arms wrapped itself around your waist and he motioned Sugar into a quick canter, Spann and her red mare following close behind.

“Better run, Jesse!”

#jesse cromeans x reader x asa emory #asa emory #jesse cromeans #the collector 2009 #the collection 2012 #laid to rest #chromeskull: laid to rest 2 #spann #jessica writes #Horror Movies #slasher fiction #this is completely self-indulgent mkay??#the collector slasher #chromeskull #its lets booly jesse hour 24/7 in my house

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eirist · 5 years

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Little Bits and Pieces of Heaven

THE IMPORTANCE OF NOT BEING NOSY

One-shot #: 13

Disclaimer: One Piece (and its characters) belongs to Eiichiro Oda-sensei.

Reminder: I have no beta-reader. Any grammatical and spelling errors are solely mine.

Warning: OOC possible. One shot.

Rating: M (Not too much though)

Note: Because I always love Zoro-Nami-Usopp interactions, I went ahead placed them in one crazy situation where Usopp, obviously, takes the brunt of everything. And somehow I keep on hitting 7k words and up recently. Though I already toned this one down because the first drafts of this story would’ve ended in a two-shot or even a multi-chap fic and I don’t want to drag it that much. Anyway enjoy.

Summary: “Because poking your long nose in other people’s business, is never a good thing.”

Soft wind blew from the sea making the white curtains of the open window flitter lazily. The port and the nearby market started to come to life as the townsfolk poured into the street for their afternoon errands. Their noises drifted inside the rather inconspicuous room along with the lulling sound of the waves, making a smile appear on the lips of one engrossed observant.

“What’s amusing out there?”

Nami spun around to look at the speaker who—very obviously—had just woken up, as he sat up on the bed, sleepily running a hand through his disheveled hair.

“Hmm…” she hummed in answer. “Nothing really.”

“Aren’t you coming back to bed?”

The corners of her lips quirked up at that as their eyes meet. There was that familiar, mischievous glint in his that she always adored as it never fails to send a delicious shiver down her spine.

She smiled impishly at him and he in turn threw a cocky smirk her way.

“Now that you are awake, yeah,” she murmured before sauntering towards bed, never breaking their eye contact.

The moment she was near enough, he reached for her robe’s belt, yanking her brusquely to him and simultaneously untying the knot as well. The silky fabric immediately slid down her shoulders to pool at her feet.

His rough hands grabbed her waist, effortlessly lifting her, only to friskily push her down the bed. The mattress dipped from their movements and she laughed when he playfully trapped her underneath his well-built physique; the blankets tangling around their legs.

He grazed her lips with his teasingly, before kissing her fully.

“We still have time?” He asked huskily against her mouth, before moving to that ticklish spot just below her jaw.

“I think we do…” she breathed, angling her head to give him more access.

“Good.” He muttered before attacking the slender column of her neck with soft, tantalizing kisses.

She moaned when he nipped at her skin, and gasped his name when he deliberately traced the shell of her ear with his tongue. She ran both of her hands through his hair as she felt him grabbed at her thighs, urging her to wrap them around him as he settled comfortably between her legs.

A sudden commotion outside interrupted them as shouting and loud, running footsteps can be heard all over the street. There was an unmistakable sound of explosion somewhere. Followed by another and another.

“Uuuh…” the orange-haired woman groaned irritably.

The man above her stopped his ministrations and stared at her amusedly with a smirk on his face. “Duty calls?”

“I think my captain just got himself into trouble again,” she pouted. Planting a sweet kiss on his jaw, she looked at him slyly as she let her hands caressed his well-toned pectorals. “Too bad,” she said with a sigh as she lightly pushed him away from her so she could sit up.

His deep laugh filled the room and he leaned down to brush one last kiss on her lips. “It’s alright. We can always do this some other time.”

Nami smiled brightly at that. “Well… I guess see you on the next island then.”

-------------------------

The galley of the Thousand Sunny that night was startlingly at its quietest. Dinner was put on hold for the meantime as Nami all but bit off the heads of their two nakamas; who were both sitting soundlessly on the galley’s couch like two children being reproached by their mother.

“That’s it aho sencho!” Nami hissed furiously, gripping the front of Luffy’s red shirt tightly. “The next time you create a ruckus and gets us chased out of town again, I swear I will drown your sorry ass!”

Usopp watch edgily from the sidelines. He was one of the unlucky ones (aside from the cooking Sanji), who was in the galley the moment Nami entered while dragging Luffy and Zoro inside.

Luffy just grinned sheepishly in response to her. “Shishishi! But Nami, we did make it out of there!” He tapped her in the shoulder in an attempt to appease her. But that only served to ignite the orange-haired’s temper more.

“WE ALMOST DID NOT!” Nami roared and clocked him with enough force to plant his face on the galley’s floor, almost breaking it.

Everyone present inwardly winced at the sound it made.

Usopp’s eyes met Zoro’s. The green-haired man seemed unfazed with Nami’s anger. Most probably because he was used to it since he is usually the person at the receiving end of it.

But much to the sniper’s surprise, he was just silent all-throughout Nami’s outburst. Zoro kept his mouth shut with his arms folded across his chest. Not once did he answer back to the navigator.

Though Usopp had seen the way the corner of his mouth twitched slightly indicating that he was trying really hard to stop himself from snapping back at her.

From the way Zoro was looking, he was probably planning an absolutely painful demise for Nami right now… if he still hadn’t killed her a dozen times already inside his head.

He heard a huff from the kitchen. Sanji had busied himself with preparing their dinner, never once butting in like he usually did lest he join the other two morons on the couch.

“Serves you right, shitty gomu,” he finally muttered, peering at them from behind the bar counter. He lit a cigarette and took a drag. “Three times in a row. In every damn island. I can’t believe it.” He blew out the smoke with a slight shake of his head. “Wait I take that back. Actually I can since it’s you.”

Luffy lifted his head off the floor. “But Sanji. It’s not my fault!”

“Shut up Luffy!” Nami snarled. “I don’t care whose fault it is! I swear you piss me off so much right now!” She closed her eyes, fingers rubbing circles on her temples.

She was forced to run all over the town earlier looking for her doofus captain. Much to her trepidation, Luffy was being chased by two different pirate crews for reasons she doesn’t even want to know.

The navigator nearly got trampled when the idiot cheerfully ran towards her direction, waving at her enthusiastically, with the pack of enraged men still at his heels. If it wasn’t for Zoro suddenly appearing out of nowhere and sending a powerful attack towards Luffy’s pursuers that had them flying everywhere, she would’ve been flattened beyond recognition.

Relief washed over her but it was short-lived. Before she can stop him, Luffy drew his arms back and released a Gomu Gomu no Gatling on the remaining pirates who were luckily at the far back of the horde they were missed by Zoro’s attack.

She looked on in horror as other pirates arrived to help their fallen crew mates. Luffy and Zoro plus a horde of violent pirates in one place…

It was a disaster!

Nami can only watch in dismay as the two dove head first into an all-out brawl before she can grab them by the scruff of their necks.

A vein popped on her forehead, then another and another. Not only did Luffy put a stop to what was supposedly an intimate and enjoyable afternoon. But here he is with the other idiot of the crew, in a scuffle that will flatten this town in a matter of seconds. Summoning Zeus, she unleashed a powerful lightning blast enough to fry everyone in the vicinity into oblivion.

Then she dragged the two by their ears just as the townspeople, who weren’t caught in the crossfire, started amassing with clubs, wooden sticks and pitchforks (much to her surprise); eager to beat up the pirates who nearly destroyed their town.

The navigator let out an exasperated sigh and announced a bit wearily. “I’m going to take a bath,” she turned towards the blond chef. “Sanji-kun, you can go ahead and serve dinner.”

The cook nodded. “As you wish Nami-san but how about you?

“I’ll eat later.”

Sanji frowned slightly at that. “You know that I don’t like starting dinner if my lovely angel is not going to eat.”

“Uhm,” Usopp choose to intrude this moment or all the boys will starve. “Robin’s probably hungry. She did a lot of book shopping earlier.”

That swayed the cook into action. “Ah my Robin-chwan! Of course!” He cried out. “Go ahead Nami-swan. Take a relaxing bath first! Do you want me to prepare it for you?”

“It’s ok Sanji-kun. I can manage.” Nami said with a dismissive wave of her hand as she proceeded towards the ladder leading to the upper deck.

“I’ll prepare a special meal for you later my love!” Sanji called out after her. “Just take your time and wash away all the stress and worries these two dumbasses,” he glared at Zoro and Luffy. “Gave you!”

Zoro scowled darkly at him.

Luffy automatically pushed himself into a sitting position when he heard the word dinner. Glancing at Nami with a sulky pout he complained, “Nami! Why aren’t you also mad at Zoro?”

The green-haired man stiffened as Nami stopped in her tracks. Zoro glared at his captain for deliberately throwing him straight into the witch’s wrath. He was not in the mood to start a row with her… that is why he kept mum all throughout her rant.

“Luffy, I attacked to save her.” He reminded his captain flatly. “Not because I wanted to start a fight with them.”

“But you also attacked again to fight them.”

Zoro opened his mouth to retort but was interrupted by Nami clonking Luffy on the head. “It’s because I’ve exhausted myself too much on you! I will get to him later once I have enough energy again!”

As Luffy whined and nursed the bump on his head; Zoro grumbled curses under his breath, muttering that he should’ve let the enemy pirates flattened Nami to the ground.

She turned towards him and smiled sweetly. Too sweetly it was actually bordering to scary. “I heard that Zoro,” she said through gritted teeth. “Hold your horses. I will make your fucking ears bleed later.”

“That couldn’t be good,” Usopp mumbled from across the table. A re-energized Nami would definitely wage a verbal war with the swordsman no matter what time of the day it is.

Zoro stood up and met Nami’s gaze directly. “How about some gratitude for saving your ass onna?”

Nami scoffed. “Thank you for saving me Zoro! It should have ended with THAT instead of you two engaging in a fight! Argh!” She shrieked at the green-haired man. “I swear you and Luffy are absolute headaches! I’m not even halfway finished with my shopping…”

“How is that my fault woman?!” Zoro seethed. “You had all day today to—”

“Just shut up Zoro. I’ll deal with you later.” The navigator said exasperatedly. “Just know that your debt and Luffy’s went way past the roof today! Kami, I need a really warm bath to relieve all this stress!”

“You witch!” The tall lad finally snapped at her.

Usopp gulped. Zoro seemed to have reached the end of his rope. From the way the two were now glowering at each other, they’re gonna start quarreling in a matter of seconds. No thanks to their stupid captain and his big, rubber mouth.

He stood up suddenly and before he knew it his hands slammed down the table, louder than he intended. That got their attention. Though he balked a little when Nami and Zoro shifted their gazes to him.

“G-gu-guys! Please,” he stuttered. “Can we just eat? I’m already starving. Aren’t you all?” He swallowed the lump formed in his throat.

Luffy seconded his grievance. “Yeah! Sanji! Meshi! Meshi!”

Nami did not answer. Instead, with one final, furious look directed at Zoro then at Luffy; she turned her heel and headed towards the ladder again without another word.

Usopp exhaled in relief. That was close!

The door of galley opened and the other Mugiwaras started to pile in, probably aware that it’s already safe to venture inside.

A smiling Robin tilted her head slightly when she entered. “Ara… I’m glad we don’t have any fatalities tonight.” She giggled behind her mouth as her blue eyes settled on Luffy and Zoro. “I was afraid Nami will choke the life out of you two from the mêlée you’ve caused in town earlier.”

“Robin… you and your morbid thoughts.” Usopp grumbled.

“Well, disappointingly she didn’t, Robin-chwan.” Sanji said as he stepped out of the kitchen, balancing a tray filled with steaming dishes in one hand. He held out the other to take the archeologist’s own and guided her to her chair. “Anyway, dinner is served!”

-------------------------

“Nami?”

“Usopp?”

The sniper and the navigator ran at each other on the lawn deck a few hours after dinner. Or to be more specific, Usopp was on his way to the galley to sneak some midnight snacks for his watch duty later when he ran into Nami, who looked like she just got down from crow’s nest.

Usopp’s eyes shifted towards the nest then back at her. “Did you seriously climb up there to give Zoro a dressing-down?”

“So what Usopp?” Nami folded her arms across her chest. “You got a problem with it?”

He shook his head. “None actually. I’m just surprised that it didn’t end up in a spat.” He scratched his head. “Kami knows how you two can go all night yapping at each other…”

“I have my ways.” Nami muttered grumpily. “I told him if he piss me off anymore tonight, I’m gonna stab him with his swords while he’s sleeping.”

Usopp looked horrified and scared all at the same time. Nami can be really freaking scary.

“That’s horrible!” He gasped and stepped away from her. “Why are you so mad at them anyway? Are you still not used to them starting trouble everywhere we go?”

The navigator’s face scrunched up into a frown. “That’s not it Usopp! I’m just furious at them for ruining my afternoon!”

“Uhh ok…” Usopp scratched his cheek. “They ruined your shopping or something?”

“You can say that.”

Usopp nodded in understanding. He knows how Nami hates going back to the ship empty-handed whenever there is a chance to shop. “Uh, speaking of shopping… I haven’t seen you in the island earlier. Where were you?”

“Me?” Nami raised an eyebrow at him. “I was exploring the island. They have lots of shops and stalls after all.” She looked at him curiously. “Why are you looking for me?”

“It’s just that I haven’t ran into you. Not once!” Usopp explained. “I saw Robin twice and even she had not seen you!”

“I think I may have wandered a little off the beaten path to survey the island’s layout.”

This time it was Usopp’s turn to lift an eyebrow at her. “With no tools?”

Nami pursed her lips. “Why? Can’t I do an ocular first?”

“Well you can. Did you go alone?” His eyes were wide when he asked her that question. He doubts if she can fair pretty well exploring on her own knowing how much of a coward she is.

“What’s with the hundred questions Usopp?”

“Nothing! I just find it weird that I didn’t come across you earlier,” Usopp explained with a shrug. “I met everyone twice, even thrice, while looking around.”

“Why are you looking for me anyway? Do you need something?”

“Not really. I’m just wondering why no one has seen you on the island. It’s like you disappeared!”

Nami huffed. “Like I said, I was surveying and shopping. Our paths just didn’t cross. It’s no big deal.”

“Well I was worried something happened to you!”

“Don’t be such a drama queen Usopp. But thanks anyway,” The navigator smiled at him slightly. “I’ll just turn in early tonight. I’m tired from all that.”

Usopp nodded. “Alright. Good night Nami.”

“Good night Usopp.” She gave him a small wave as she started to walk away from him. “Oh and by the way, I’m charging you three hundred belis for every question you’ve asked!”

“Oi! You money fiend!” Usopp shouted. “Take that back!”

But his retorts fell on deaf ears as Nami bounded up the stairs and disappeared inside the girls’ room.

-------------------------

It was two islands later that Usopp confirmed something.

Nami was acting really odd whenever they dock.

Just like before, he didn’t run into her the whole time they were prancing around the island.

He didn’t see her anywhere. Literally anywhere.

The only time he laid eyes on her was when she got back to the Sunny a bit later than usual.

And when he asked her about it again, he received the same answer as before.

She was surveying the island and shopping and stated in a rather condescending tone that the island was big that it is possible not bump into each other.

It was rather strange because when he saw her return, she was not lugging any shopping bags nor did he saw her spend some time in the library to sketch a rough draft of the island they’ve been… something that she normally did whenever she does any visual map outs.

Besides, when did Nami window shop ever?

It was driving him nuts. What the hell is she doing? Why is she disappearing in every island they dock?

And more importantly, why is she not telling the truth?

He had been making lies all his life. The liar of course knows when someone is lying.

He made up his mind to find out.

-------------------------

The slight movement of the waves made the Thousand Sunny bobbed lightly above the water.

Up in the crow’s nest, Usopp can feel the lazy movement of the ship. Usually it lulls him to sleep even when he’s on watch.

But not tonight.

Tonight, a dozen questions were running inside his head. Questions that needed answers, it’s not giving him a moment’s rest. Questions that surfaced because of what he had discovered earlier.

“Usopp?”

The sniper jolted out of his daze at the voice. Zoro had just climbed the nest to relieve him of his shift.

“Oh hey Zoro.”

The swordsman dipped his head in response. He strode languidly towards the bench and placed his swords there. He was grasping a bottle of sake in one hand which he obviously filched from the Sunny’s stock.

“I’ll take it from here Usopp,” he said while removing his green robe. He threw it beside his precious katanas.

Usopp absent-mindedly nodded but did not move from his position.

“Usopp?”

Zoro tapped him on the shoulder and his head snapped up to look at him.

“Huh?”

“I said I’ll take it from here,” Zoro repeated, the impatience clear in his tone. He regarded him curiously. “Is there something wrong?” He asked when he noticed the sniper was not responding.

Usopp inhaled deeply. He doesn’t know how to begin explaining it.

But the swordsman is a really keen observant. Maybe he already noticed something.

“Say Zoro?”

“What?”

Usopp looked up to him again. Zoro was chugging down almost half the content of the bottle. “Have you noticed anything different with Nami lately?”

Zoro stopped drinking and was silent for a moment. Then he raised an eyebrow at him. “Different?”

Usopp nodded.

“I haven’t noticed anything different with that wicked witch.” He cocked his head to the side. “Why?”

“Nothing. It just kinda feels like she’s hiding something.”

The green-haired lad sat down beside him. “What do you mean?”

“It’s just that Nami’s acting a bit weird lately.”

Zoro scratched his head. “And?”

“She keeps disappearing whenever we dock in an island. When I questioned her about it, she said she was just out shopping and surveying.”

“What seems to be the problem with that?”

“She returns without any shopping bags Zoro! Nor is she drawing any maps as of late.” Usopp explained getting impatient himself.

“Maybe you just don’t see her doing it.”

Usopp stared at him as Zoro casually downed his drink. “Has she been pestering you to be her pack-mule-for-the-day lately?”

“No.”

“And don’t you find it strange?”

“Not really. Works for me.”

Usopp exhaled loudly. Figures. He had forgotten that Zoro have a soft spot for the navigator as big as an ant.

Silence hovered between them for a minute before Usopp choose to break it.

“I think Nami’s meeting with someone Zoro.”

That made Zoro pause with his sake bottle midway to his lips. “Meeting with someone?”

The black-haired lad nodded.

“That’s kinda, uh, vague?”

Usopp glared at him. “She’s meeting with someone. Meeting. Like she’s seeing someone.”

“Seeing someone?” Zoro repeated.

“Yes!”

Zoro let the information sink in before commenting. “First time I’ve heard of it,” he brought the bottle to his lips to drink again. “And what if she is? You jealous or something?”

“NO!” Usopp almost shouted. “No. I’m not!”

Zoro quirked an eyebrow at him.

“More of worried.”

“Worried?” The former pirate hunter looked like he was thinking. “Usopp, what’s it to us if she is seeing someone? It’s her life and her choice.”

“She’s keeping it a secret from us! She’d been lying about her whereabouts and what she’s doing!”

Zoro snorted. “And she can’t?”

“I’m worried Zoro!” This time Usopp pushed himself up and started pacing back and forth. “What if she’s seeing a bounty hunter in disguise or a marine undercover? She could be in danger and she and all of us are none the wiser!”

“Nami can handle herself well.” Zoro barely batted an eyelid as he said that. “You made sure of that when you made her that stick.”

Usopp frowned at him and the way he referred to his invention. “I know you two don’t usually meet eye to eye and that you couldn’t care less if something happens to her…”

“Oi,” Zoro said in a warning tone cutting him off.

Usopp back-pedaled. “Ok, maybe you care a little. She’s our friend after all. But Zoro, what if she can’t handle it like you’re saying? She’s not as strong as you or Sanji or Luffy!”

“Wait Usopp calm down. And stop pacing damn it!” Zoro rubbed a hand across his face. “How do you even know of this?”

That halted Usopp’s nervous outburst. “Uhm… I might’ve followed her?”

“Might have?”

“Alright! I followed her earlier! I’m worried!”

Zoro let out a ‘tch’. “And? Is there a reason to be?”

Usopp wiped his forehead with his hand frustratingly. “I don’t know! I’m not sure. That’s why I’m telling you! Maybe you can… help me?”

“Help you? How?”

“You know… that haki thing?

“Haki thing? But you also have it.”

“I don’t know how to use it!” Usopp confessed. “Unlike you, my haki’s not that developed. I can barely sense who she’s with inside the room.”

The swordsman held up one hand to stop him. “Who she’s with? Inside the room?”

Usopp bobbed his head up and down and started to explain.

“Like I’ve said, I saw her in town earlier and followed her. I saw her head towards an inn in the discreet part of the town.”

Zoro was now staring at him seriously.

“She went inside and I did too. I saw her head upstairs and knock on the door of one of the rented rooms. When it opened, she just went inside and that’s that.”

“So you didn’t see who was there in the room?”

“I didn’t.” Usopp shook his head.

The swordsman huffed. “You know, Nami’s business is her business,” he gulped down the remaining sake in the bottle. “If she wants to spend the day shacking up with someone, then she can without us meddling.”

Usopp blushed at that and Zoro shrugged at his reaction.

“You’re worrying too much Usopp.”

“And you’re worrying too little.”

Zoro look irritated at that. “I just don’t like prying in other people’s business. You know that. If you are really worried why don’t you just ask Nami about it?”

“Are you kidding? Usopp gasped. “I don’t want her to sic Zeus on me!” He grabbed Zoro’s arm.

“Have you tried asking Robin? That woman knows everything.” Zoro suggested. “Nami might have told her something.”

“Like she’d tell me if she does.”

“Ok. Point taken,” Zoro said, scratching his chin. “Though she might have an idea if Nami is seeing someone we should be wary of.”

Usopp pouted. “True. But I want to know myself.”

“Now you’re just being nosy.”

“I call that being protective!” The sniper retorted. “Zoro are we going to just wait for the day when she comes back here injured or she doesn’t come back at all?” Usopp argued. “I want to make sure that whoever the hell is that, he is not gonna cause her any harm!”

The former pirate hunter was quiet. As much as Nami always rubs him the wrong way, there’s no way in hell he would sit back and do nothing once she gets hurt.

“Usopp,” Zoro muttered his name with an edge on his tone. “Let me ask you again. You’re really sure she met with someone?”

“Uhm… yeah. I heard her talking to somebody while inside the room.”

“You heard?”

“I kinda tried to eavesdrop.”

“What did you hear?”

“It’s muffled. And they are talking in hushed tones I can barely make out what they’re saying.” His face colored suddenly. “Then I heard her giggle and there was a sound of the bed creaking or something…”

The expression on Zoro’s face was unreadable and they stared at each other awkwardly for a few seconds. “Uh,” Zoro rubbed the back of his neck, looking uncomfortable. “What did you do then?”

“I waited up for her in the bar downstairs. Until she came out of the room and went back here.”

“You didn’t think to wait up on who will come out of that room after her?”

Usopp cringed. Well he didn’t think of that. “It kinda slipped my mind,” he confessed sheepishly.

A snort came from the Supernova.

“That’s why I’m asking for your help!”

“Usopp…”

“We are crew mates! I just don’t want her getting involve with someone who might be dangerous!”

Zoro pinched the bridge of his nose. “I’ll talk to Nami.” He suddenly announced and Usopp panicked.

“No! She’ll have my hide if she finds out I’m suspicious of her and stalking her and her… I don’t know what to call it… lover?”

The Mugiwara first mate grimaced at the word. “Then what do you want to do Usopp?!”

Usopp grabbed both of his arms. “Just come with me and figure out who she’s seeing and if that man is dangerous or not! That way we can protect her if need be!”

The swordsman sighed. Nami will have their asses for this. “You know talking to her is still the best way Usopp.”

“Come on please! It will help me sleep at night! Besides I’m scared of her.” Usopp proclaimed firmly.

Zoro rubbed a hand on his face. “You’re a good friend Usopp. Even if you’re poking your long nose where it’s unwanted,” he then smirked. “Alright. I’ll help you.”

“Really Zoro?”

The green-haired man nodded. “Who else knows about this?”

Usopp looked startled at his question. “Uhm, just me. I don’t want anyone else to know,” he answered. “This is not the kind of thing you tell Luffy or heaven’s forbid, Sanji.”

“Keep it that way,” Zoro advised. “The next time we dock, we’ll see what this is all about.”

The sniper had tears in his eyes. He cannot help but wrap his arms around the tall lad. “Thanks Zoro! You’re the best!”

“HEY! GET OFF ME USOPP!”

-------------------------

“So?”

He was immediately at the receiving end of a sharp glare.

“I can’t sense anyone with her Usopp.” Zoro replied.

“Are you sure?” Usopp whispered.

Zoro’s good eye narrowed dangerously at him. “I’m pretty sure.” He crossed his arms over his chest.

They Straw Hats had just anchored in another island and Usopp all but drag Zoro to follow their navigator as she made her way into town. Honestly, he didn’t know if it was a really good idea to lug the tall swordsman who always gets himself lost after three steps but he needed help.

Just in case it ends in a confrontation and Nami’s lover is someone Usopp cannot defeat. He can just let Zoro do the honors.

And he gotta hand it to the green-haired man, even if he did managed to turn them around wrong corners and streets and almost lost the mapmaker they were tailing. Zoro was still able to find they place where Nami is.

Thank Kami for haki. Maybe Zoro should use it more often and avoid getting lost anywhere they go.

Usopp fidgeted nervously. They were in the inn where they saw Nami disappeared into. They headed straight upstairs, thankful that the innkeeper was preoccupied with a fight that broke out in the first floor bar.

“Maybe the guy she’s seeing found out we’re trailing her!” The sharpshooter remarked fretfully. “And since he doesn’t want to reveal himself, he just stood her up! Oh Kami! She’ll be in a pissed off mood later!”

“Well…” Zoro clicked his tongue. “If you suck at tailing someone then yeah that is possible.”

“I hate you!”

“Look Usopp,” Zoro ran a hand through his hair exasperatedly. “Maybe he’s just late or something. We better not be here in case he finally shows up.”

“But…”

“Tell you what. I’ll do the stake out here until Nami gets back to the ship.” Zoro suggested much to Usopp’s shock.

“You would?” Usopp breathed out.

“Yeah,” Zoro nodded. “But in return you buy me booze.” He pointed towards the bar with his thumb.

Usopp stared at him.

“Favor for a favor.”

The long nosed sniper sighed. He can’t very well stay. If the man Nami is meeting already discovered she’s being followed, then he might not show up in the inn.

Maybe leaving it to Zoro is a much better idea. The man has razor sharp senses and he can sit tight in one bar drinking the whole stock empty but still be aware of everything and everyone around him.

This would definitely burn holes in his pockets. But he made it his mission. So he has to see it until the end.

Besides, if Nami sees him, it would only look like Zoro just randomly ended up in this establishment after getting lost in his wanderings.

“Alright,” Usopp agreed. “But you have to tell me everything you’ll find out.

Zoro bobbed his head slightly. “Sure.”

“And don’t go picking fights with anyone.”

Zoro growled at him. “I’m not Luffy.”

“We have to find out who that man is ok?” Usopp gripped him on both shoulders.

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever helps you sleep at night Usopp.”

-------------------------

The door of the room opened and Nami immediately swiveled around with a huff and marched towards the man who just entered the room.

“So?” She asked, raising one delicate eyebrow.

Zoro locked the door behind him and met her impatient gaze with an amused one.

“What happened?” The orange-haired woman placed both hands on her hips as she waited for him to tell her the details of his afternoon with Usopp.

“Told him I’d do the stake out and spy on you, the swordsman answered. “Then send him off his merry way.”

Nami pouted. Zoro told her that Usopp was getting suspicious of her and her activities and that he followed her on the last island and actually saw her go inside an inn. “I swear his long nose isn’t just for show!”

Zoro laughed as he removed his swords, resting them against the small bedside table. He approached Nami and wrapped his arms around her.

“Usopp’s just looking out for you,” he kissed her forehead. “Even I couldn’t get annoyed with him being nosy with that kind of reason.” He tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. “He’s a good friend that much I can say.”

“I know,” Nami mumbled. “And I appreciate his meddlesome self just this once.” She rubbed her hands on his shoulders tenderly. “He didn’t need to go this far though.”

“He just wants to know if you are seeing someone dangerous or a threat to your safety.”

Nami arched an eyebrow at that. Then a cheeky smile spread across her lips. “I am seeing someone dangerous.” She patted him on the chest.

“You are?”

She nodded and she pushed him towards the one arm chair available inside the room. He ungracefully plopped down on it and smirked when she sat herself on his lap.

“Yes,” she murmured as she brought her lips closer to his. “Former bounty hunter?” She kissed him light and fleeting. “Supernova?” She kissed him again, deeply this time. “More than 300 million bounty on his head?” She grinned. “Dangerous.”

His hands roamed across her body freely, liking the way her silk robe was clinging tightly against her body and how it feels against his calloused palms. “Guess he really have a reason to worry.” He said in a gruff tone before capturing her lips with his.

She pressed her body closer to his. Zoro’s one hand settled itself on the curve of her hips while the other grabbed at her nape so he can kiss her deeper.

Nami opened her mouth for him, coaxing him to slip his tongue inside and play with hers as her hands busied themselves undoing the sash that held his green robe.

She moaned in frustration when he pulled away to gaze at her. Her hands slid inside his clothing, pushing it down his broad shoulders as he started kissing her neck, his warm lips sending shivers all throughout her already heated body.

“Maybe he deserves a thank you something for this after all,” Nami whispered, raking her hands through Zoro’s green hair. As much as it was irksome, she can’t help but feel lucky that she have friends who looks out for her and has her back.

“Maybe he does,” Zoro agreed as he stopped showering her neck with kisses and instead moved to that ticklish spot behind her ear.

She grabbed a fistful of his hair and whimpered. That spot always drives her crazy.

Zoro suddenly pulled her closer to him, their nose almost touching as he stared at her with raw desire behind his gray eye. “Enough about Usopp, we’ll deal with him later,” his voice was rough that it almost came out as a growl. His hand was caressing her backside. “Are you naked underneath that?”

A Cheshire cat-like grin appeared on Nami’s face at his question. She playfully removed herself from his embrace and stepped away from him.

“Why don’t you find out?” She mischievously walked backwards to the bed as he continued to sit on the arm chair, watching her intensely.

“You take the fun out of undressing you.”

“Well maybe if you are here sooner you would’ve been able to take all my clothes off.”

Zoro just chuckled.

“Don’t fret,” Nami smirked at him, pulling at the knot of her robe. “I saved one for you.”

She turn around, letting the garment drop down the floor and climbed on the bed, giving Zoro a full view of her irresistible bottom in lacy red thong.

She heard his breath hitched and the sound ignited every single part of her body.

The navigator swiveled her head to look back at him, teasingly and sexily, as her wild orange locks fell on one shoulder. Zoro was now on the edge of the seat, his one eye trained on her as he took in the sensuous sight. He was almost devouring her with his gaze as he ran a tongue on his lower lip, looking almost predatory.

Oh she knows how he loves seeing her on all fours, just as much as he loves seeing her spread out deliciously in front of him.

“Come on Zoro,” she called out seductively. “Are you just gonna sit there and stare?”

-------------------------

Usopp grumbled as he trudged glumly towards his factory. The day had been an utter waste. And he was nowhere near getting any answers to his Nami-related questions.

He went back at the inn earlier to check on Zoro and the idiot swordsman disappeared on him.

How can one get lost while just sitting on the bar drinking? Gosh this is a whole new level of Zoro’s getting-lost-talent!

Strangely when he asked the barkeeper if he had seen a green-haired man drinking within the vicinity, he said he did not have any customer like that.

The idiot swordsman tricked him into paying for his drinks and probably went into another bar!

So much for helping him out!

But when he saw Zoro in the Sunny before dinner, the swordsman gave him back his money pouch.

“I wasn’t able to use it,” Zoro said, patting him on the shoulder. “Thanks anyway Usopp.”

“Why aren’t you in the bar earlier?” Usopp hissed at him. “I went back and you’re not there!”

“Well, no one showed up,” the green-haired lad explained with a shrug. “No use staying there waiting for nothing.”

“Oh,” Usopp mouthed. “Oh my god! Nami’s gonna be furious!” He grabbed Zoro by the arm. “Where is she? Is she back here already in the Sunny?”

“I don’t know,” Zoro grumbled.

Their conversation was interrupted by Sanji yelling ‘dinner’.

“I’ll talk to you later,” Usopp muttered and Zoro just yawned in response.

“If I’m sleeping don’t wake me.” The tall lad reminded him as he headed towards the galley.

“But…”

“Don’t worry. We’ll talk Usopp. I just have nothing to tell you about earlier that will be helpful.” Zoro grunted before leaving him on the deck.

Usopp sighed. Now he’s back into square one.

He pushed the door to his factory open and stopped short.

There was rectangular-shaped box, gift-wrapped with an orange bow, resting quietly on his work table with a note attached to it.

He warily approached the gift and studied it. It was kinda heavy. He shook it a little, hoping to get an idea on what was inside. He glanced at the note and was surprised to see what was on it.

It said ‘thanks’ in a very familiar handwriting. And as if to make sure he’s not going to be mistaken as to who it was from, a mikan was drawn on the bottom right part of the paper.

What the hell?

A cold, clammy feeling suddenly enveloped him. And he started to sweat profusely.

Nami had found out! She must’ve caught Zoro earlier. Damn it!

-------------------------

Usopp made his way up the rope ladder to the crow’s nest. He doesn’t care if Zoro’s asleep or not. He had some explaining to do.

He heaved himself up the metal rung and when he reached the top, he called out. “Zo—”

“Hello Usopp.”

The sniper’s eyes widened when he saw who was in front of him and he froze. What is Nami doing here? From the way she was standing near the hatch, Nami seems to be aware that he was on his way up.

His gaze shifted towards green-haired lad sitting casually on the bench, looking at him a bit smugly. Zoro must’ve sensed him and told the navigator.

Usopp all but stammered. “I-I-I’ll just return later.”

Nami suddenly grabbed him by the nose and pulled him inside.

“Hey ouch!” He cried out, slapping her hand away. “Let go!”

The mapmaker relented and placed her hands on her hips, smiling wickedly at him. “So did you like my thank you gift?”

Usopp gulped from his sitting position on the metal floor while rubbing his nose. “I haven’t opened it yet.” Actually, he did not have the courage to open it. He just stared at it as seconds turned to minutes before coming to a decision to head to the crow’s nest and talk to Zoro.

Nami pouted. “Why? You’ll like it. I promise!”

That sentence scared him even more than Nami who was right in front of him.

Zoro was watching them from his spot, the amused expression clearly visible on his face.

“Zoro!” Usopp suddenly yelped. “I can’t believe you told on me!”

The swordsman laughed at his accusation. “I had too.”

“You didn’t have too!” Usopp growled at him. “Did she caught you earlier and threatened you into confessing?”

Zoro scowled at that. “She didn’t.”

“That’s right. I didn’t. He went and told me on his own volition.” Nami suddenly leaned towards him so they were face to face. “So you were following me around recently?”

“Uhm…”

“Because you want to know what I’m doing and who I’m seeing huh Usopp?”

Usopp refused to answer. After all when this is over, they would probably be fishing his dead remains on the sea… that is, if the sea kings didn’t get to it first. He glared daggers at Zoro who was looking so calm for someone who was also involved with snooping on Nami’s afternoon tryst.

Then it struck him. Zoro must’ve sold him out! He cannot believe it! He cannot believe he is capable of that. Wasn’t he a man of honor?

Nami peered at his face when he did not utter any word. “Are you still in there Usopp?”

“I think I’m already dead.”

Zoro snorted at his response.

The navigator laughed. “You’re exaggerating.” She grinned cattily at him. “You really want to know who I’m seeing Usopp? From what Zoro told me, you already know what I’m doing…”

The sniper blinked at her, startled by her offer. Then he blushed at her statement.

“I will introduce you to him,” Nami offered. “So you don’t have to follow me around or exert too much effort spying on what I do. Kami knows what you might see.”

Zoro coughed at that as Usopp turned a darker shade of red.

Then his dark eyes shifted from Zoro then to Nami. And he realized something.

If Nami knows what he was doing because Zoro told her straight away…

…Zoro must’ve known what she’s been up to all along!

“I can’t believe you Zoro,” Usopp unexpectedly cried out, that Zoro was taken aback. “You should’ve just told me that you knew what Nami’s been up to!”

Zoro folded his arms across his chest, leaning back into the bench. “Why would I do that? Do you think I want her pissed with me?”

“Whatever happened to loyalty?”

The swordsman’s face scrunched into a frown at his accusation.

“Of course Zoro’s loyal,” Nami interrupted, huffing. With a roll of her brown eyes, she grabbed Usopp by the straps of his suspenders, dragging him towards where Zoro was sitting. “He’s loyal to me.”

“Huh?” Usopp was dumbfounded. When did Zoro gave precedence to Nami over him?

Nami’s grin was too mischievous for his liking.

“Say hello to the man I’m seeing Usopp.”

Usopp’s eyes widened and his jaw dropped off its hinges.

Zoro barely smirk and shook his head at their antics. He and Nami agreed that maybe it would be better to let Usopp in on the secret rather than watch him spiral down into anxiety.

The sniper spent the whole five minutes gawking at them. “But… but…” he managed to stutter after a long while. “You don’t even like each other! You always fight and never agree to anything! You actually cannot stand each other! How did this happen?!”

Zoro and Nami shared a glance.

“Well…”

“I’m so confused right now.” Usopp declared with a shake of his head. He studied his two nakama who never in his wildest dream would eventually get together.

“Sorry Usopp,” Zoro chuckled as he leaned forward. “But Nami and I agreed to keep this a secret. Though I really appreciate that you’re looking out for her.”

“And I hope this helps you sleep at night,” Nami winked at him before settling down beside the swordsman.

Usopp closed his eyes. It feels like someone’s playing a joke on him. Nami and Zoro? Of all the strangest things to ever happen in this side of the New World…

… THIS tops it all.

“And now that you know our secret,” Nami wagged a finger at him as she tucked her legs under her. “You are going to help us keep it that way!”

Usopp’s eyes widened. For heaven’s sake! How was he going to keep this a secret? It nearly drove him crazy when he was keeping his mouth shut about Nami’s strange behavior. And he actually went to Zoro to talk about it.

Because he cannot fucking keep it to himself!

Now THIS?

This is a nightmare!

And Nami seems to be aware of his dilemma because the grin on her face when she rested her head against Zoro’s shoulder was purely too evil.

This is what he got for poking his long nose into her business—their business—regardless of the reasons.

He’s now in on their secret.

And this secret…

He realized with a sinking feeling.

… Is gonna be hell to keep.

#zoro x nami #ZoNa #zonami #zonalove #zona one-shots #zoro nami fanfiction #one piece fanfiction #roronoa zoro #nami

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dusty-cookie · 7 years

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Through The Valley - Chapter 5

Fic Summary: A deeper look into The Sanctuary.

Boy meets girl. Girl meets boy. Boy has a weird obsession with a baseball bat, promiscuity and the word “fuck”. Girl has to find out if she can look past these things. Also, zombies and shit.

AO3 Link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/10075958/chapters/23378913

Tags: @rickdixonandthefandomlifeposts @embracetheapocalypsewithme @redisunamused @kinkozan @lupienne @theblack-wolf @lovingzombiechaos @dragonracer @miiraal

Pairing: Negan X OFC

Chapter Summary: Mornings are for coffee and contemplation.

The first light of morning was starting to pierce the blue of the night, carrying promises of another hot day under the merciless Virginian summer sun.

Lilly was standing on top of the stairs that led down to the small garden and enjoyed her first cup of coffee, brewed on the little cooking station she had set up on the back porch. It had been her daily ritual for the nearly three months that she and Jax had been staying at this place. Get up at the first light of dawn, make coffee, plan another day of hunting, scavenging and piercing skulls. She had never been a good sleeper, but living outside of a community had resulted in her tossing and turning each night with barely four hours of sleep in between nightmares and lying awake, listening to every sound inside and outside of the house.

She leaned against one of the porch posts with a content sigh and blew into the steaming cup that she was cradling in her hands. Better to enjoy some peace and quiet before the horde of men came back from their little sleepover in the school. She couldn’t wait to see if Jax was okay, of course, but the thought of having her home invaded by strangers again made her anxious.

It was probably best if she stopped thinking about this place as her home and those men as strangers real quick.

Lilly knew that Jax could handle himself. When he wasn’t glowering at a bunch of invaders, he was actually a very friendly and outgoing guy. He’d probably come back with four new best friends, beaming happily at her and demanding breakfast and sharing inside jokes they had collected during the night.

She took a sip of coffee and thought that her own guest probably wouldn’t be as enthusiastic about seeing her again in the morning. She still couldn’t decide if it had been genius or insane to pull her little handcuff stunt. She may have ruined her chances of joining a new community, but her fear of being alone all night in the house with a man she had just met had drowned out all reason. She would just have to think of something to placate him and hope that he was as reasonable and friendly as he had been before she had gotten his cock up and then blocked.

Negan. Impressive name. Impressive man.

Lilly thought that he had done a damn good job convincing her and Jax of joining his community. The combination of logic, jokes and promises of a safe home had won them over in the end. Negan had laid it on a big thick with the compliments, but Lilly guessed that that was his way of ensuring people that he and his men were friendly. Though she had no doubt that his friendliness would be quickly replaced with something far more sinister when provoked. She could only hope that she wouldn’t be on the other end of a bad tempered leader with a baseball bat when she went upstairs to uncuff him later. Maybe she should have just fucked him. He was attractive enough.

Fucking her new boss before she even started at this new place, great idea.

She would just present him with a nice breakfast and a big pot of coffee for him and his men and hope for the best, she decided.

She was so lost in thought, sipping her coffee, looking over the garden that was slowly basked in soft sunlight and thinking of tall men with foul mouths and leather jackets, that she nearly jumped out of her skin when she heard a loud SLAP and felt a stinging pain on her right butt cheek.

She yelped, dropped her cup, which shattered at her feet and spun around, while simultaneously going for the machete on her hip when she felt a hand around her wrist, applying just enough pressure not to hurt, but making sure that she couldn’t draw her weapon. The object of her former musings was baring his teeth mere inches away from her face, his broad frame towering over her. Lilly’s eyes widened in fear and she was sure that she had fucked up by once again utterly failing to read a person’s behaviour. This wasn’t a strict, but benevolent leader who just wanted to recruit new people for his community. He was here to kill her; Jax was probably bleeding out on the school’s linoleum floor at this very moment. These weren’t Saviors, they were killers. And Negan, if that was even his real name, would now proceed to take what he didn’t get last night and then murder her in the most brutal way.

“Told you you’d get a fucking spanking.”

He was grinning at her and she opened her mouth to say something, but her mind was drawing a blank.

“What? You don’t like it? I got the impression that you’re into all this freaky shit after that fucking show of yours last night.”

She blinked. Why was he cracking jokes? Was that some form of sick psychological torture before bashing her head in with his bat? Where was that weird thing, anyway? She looked down at his hands and then back at his face. His grin had been replaced by a look of concern and he released her wrist and took a step back.

“You… you’re not going to kill me?”

“I still might if you don’t pull the keys out of your ass and take these off.”

He held his arms out in front of him and she realized he was still half naked and handcuffed. She fumbled for the small key in her jeans pocket and gave it to him with shaking hands. He took off the handcuffs, which fell to the ground and put on the shirt he had stuffed into the back pocket of his pants. He then stepped in front of her again and poked his index finger into her shoulder and looked at her with a very serious expression.

“What the fuck was that all about? I offer you a place in my home and go out of my fucking way to make you fucking comfortable and you thank me by going all dominatrix on my ass?”

Lilly sucked in two more shaky breaths before answering.

“Look, I’m sorry, okay? You wouldn’t be the first man I met to turn into fucking Ted Bundy in the throes of passion.”

“What the fuck? Are you fucking kidding me? Do I look like a fucking raping serial killer to you?”

“I have no idea what you look like. I only just met you, you were adamant about being alone with me and I figured, if we were still cool in the morning, it was a sign that you really are just a bunch of normal people who are interested in us joining your community.”

“Oh we are so fucking far away from being cool, you might as well paint me red and hand me a fucking pitchfork.”

Lilly put a hand on his forearm and the small gesture seemed to calm him down a notch. She noticed him staring at the heavy rise and fall of her chest and figured that she wasn’t above using her female charm to get herself out of this situation. It had already worked on him once, after all.

“I really am sorry, Negan, for deceiving you like that. I panicked. Please don’t be mad at me? I do like you a lot, but being with you last night brought back some really bad memories. It’s a fucked-up world out there, especially for a woman.”

She felt like she needed a shower after spewing so much bullshit.

She hadn’t panicked. Not last night, anyway. She had it all planned out from the moment he had suggested to separate her and Jax for the night. But he didn’t need to know that. She could play the frightened little princess until she got one foot in his community.

His eyes softened and he took his hand away from her collarbone. He looked around and noticed the steaming pot on the camping stove.

“Is that fucking coffee?”

“Yeah. You want a cup?”

“Fuck yes! It’s the least you can do to get back into my good graces. Or my pants. Offer still stands.”

She laughed and hurried to the plastic garden table to pour Negan some coffee. She handed him the cup, took a fresh one for herself and couldn’t help being curious:

“So, uhm, how did you get free?”

He took a sip and grimaced, though she couldn’t tell whether it was from the question, the taste or the temperature.

“The fucking headboard came off. Next time you want to try out some kinky shit, make sure your fucking props are a bit sturdier.”

“Oh… well… I’m not exactly used to having such a hunk in my bed.”

“Stop fucking buttering me up, bitch. I won’t fucking kill you, but I also don’t want to hear any more of your bullshit sweet-talk.”

Lilly frowned and muttered “Don’t call me a bitch.” under her breath and his eyebrows shot up.

“Are you for fucking real right now?”

“I hate the word. It’s degrading to women.”

“Says the bitch that left me with my arms tied over my head all night.”

“Apparently not all night.” she murmured and Negan scoffed, before she gave him a half smile: “By the way… thanks for staying in your room and not taking your baseball bat to my head.”

“The day has only just begun, so you better play really fucking nice from now on. At least I got to fire one off before I fell asleep… would have been a waste of a perfectly good boner.”

Lilly hid her grin behind her cup.

“Okay, I’ll think of something to make it up to you.”

“You can start by giving me a run-down of all the fucking things we’re going to take home with us.”

“Can I at least finish my first cup of coffee? I really don’t function properly without a good dose of caffeine in my system.”

“Again with the fucking demands.” he sighed dramatically, “We’re not even home yet, and you’re already busting my balls. But yeah, sure, finish your fucking coffee. Might be a long time before you get another cup. My people at the Sanctuary are going to fucking rip each other apart to get their hands on the fucking stuff.”

“The Sanctuary? You named your community?” she looked at him in amusement.

“Hey, don’t fucking look at me like I’m some fucking weirdo. Just for your information, there are quite a lot of fucking groups out there with much stranger names. And it serves a purpose. It increases people’s sense of community. Strengthens the team spirit.”

“Wow. That actually makes sense.” Lilly sat down on one of the plastic lawn chairs and propped her feet up on the table. She was rather impressed with what she had seen of Negan’s leadership skills so far and she allowed herself to relax and soak up some of the sunlight that was hitting the porch now. She watched as Negan eyed the other lawn chair suspiciously, clearly contemplating whether it would survive an attempt of him sitting down. She pointed over her shoulder.

“There’s a wooden one folded up against that wall.”

Negan followed her directions, unfolded the chair and happily sat down next to her.

“Thanks! I’ve destroyed one too many of those fuckers in my life.”

“Yeah, wouldn’t want you to land on your ass first thing in the morning, Big Guy. One person with a hurting backside is quite enough… Ouch!”

She rubbed her butt where Negan had slapped her earlier. No doubt there would be an imprint of his giant hand there if she cared to look. He seemed to find her discomfort incredibly funny, judging by the devious grin creeping up on his face.

“Fucking hurts, doesn’t it? Good. You’re lucky you pulled your fucking stunt while we were alone. Can’t let shit like that fly in front of my men. So you better keep your fucking mouth shut about last night. Unless of course you really are into kinky shit like handcuffs and spanking, then by all means, be my fucking guest.”

She grinned and, after taking a final sip from her coffee, swung her combat boots off the table and stood up to look down at him.

“Oh please. Handcuffs and a pat on the butt? A bit vanilla, don’t you think?” she had to keep herself from laughing when he choked on his coffee and asked him with a sweet smile: “Breakfast?” just before a loud knock came from the front door.

The boys were back. Time to get this show on the road.

#negan #comic negan #comicnegan>#negan fanfic #negan fanfiction #negan x oc #The Walking Dead #twd #the walking dead fanfiction #twd fanfiction #here's negan #through the valley

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