#like spanish makes my brain hurt so much more 😭😭😭😭
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im slightly embarrassed at how much time ive spent studying this month (hint - not much compared to last month, will post EOM summary in another week)
HOWEVER i am productively moving forward and i am celebrating what ive done so far!!!
i got to buy a new tree on the forest app!!! she's beautiful 💜
THIS WORK WEEK im watching comprehensible input / destinos as soon as i wake up (7am), before work (8am), and for lunch (12pm or 12:30pm). one and half hours before EOD 😊 (waiting until i get off of work to study isn't working - this is plan A to compensate 5pm mental exhaustion)
i just sat for a Super Big Work-Related certification a little under two weeks ago (and passed 🎉), and im now studying for a Relatively Tiny Volunteer certification for a local nonprofit. i expect to be done EOD tomorrow, but itll def show up as my biggest time suck EOM. i just want to study spanish!!!!!! let me!!!!!!!!!!
last but not least I Am Getting Through that learn hangul in 90 mins video by EOW
#*#the work cert i studied for took literal months of active studying#and ljke a twenty hour class#this volunteer cert is total less than 15 hours of reading and such#so tiny!!!!!!!#baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!#i wish studying spanish was as easy as studying for these certs tho#like spanish makes my brain hurt so much more 😭😭😭😭
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Rosita Espinosa dating headcanons!! :P (fem!reader)
~slight NSFW!!! Minors DNI~
Okay i don't even know where to start
She's the jealous type girlfriend for real. She'd get so upset seeing other people touch/flirt with you and will definitely remind them that you're hers. (Inspired by a rosita fanfic i read a while ago🌚)
She'd act really tough in public, but as soon as the 2 of you are alone together, she couldn't keep her hands of you. LOL
Very overprotective, whoever hurts you gets a piece of her mind, she's gotten in trouble many times for doing things to defend you
Can be very submissive, would beg you to have fun with her and other stuff
But she can be very dominant too. It really depends on her mood, LMAO (i seriously don't know whether she'd be submissive or dominant, but in my eyes, she's a bit of both)
Will sit with you for hours listening to you talk about the most random stuff, purely just to listen to your voice
I dont know why, but Rosita really seems like the type of girlfriend to walk around the house wearing barely anything
Will sneak up behind you just to hug you from behind, covering your neck with hickeys
Enjoys placing hickeys in places that are visible, just so people know you're not available
Like i said, she's very overprotective. You guys are pretty much an unstoppable duo. If someone messed with one of you, the other will definitely do something messed up😝
Once again, very hard to decide, but i feel like the majority of the intimate things really depend on her mood. One moment, she is the most romantic, sweet, passionate person ever. The other moment, she'll be very rough with you
Takes aftercare very serious, she'd pretty much do anything for you lmao
If she wants something, she's gonna get it. She will literally pull you aside to a more private spot just to fuck your brains out
She'd definitely call you "baby" a lot, i just know she would
(My friends headcanon, and mine tbh) Will speak Spanish to you while fucking you, dunno while, she just would
Teases you in public a lot. She'd definitely "touch" you in public, too🤭 (upcoming fanfic? Yes😈) i can just imagine her randomly moaning in your ear just so show you how horny she is
Would randomly grab your ass, for sure
She'd do pretty much anything to make you happy, you're her whole world
(According to my girlfriend) Rosita likes getting her ass ate🤭
Very touchy in public
Doesn't care where you guys are, she'd fuck you anywhere, during runs, in the woods, she'd even pull you in another room to fuck you knowing damn well there are other people in the house
With you 24/7 just to make sure you're save
If you do get hurt, even if it's just a tiny cut, she'd do anything to make sure you're fine
She'd kill for you
He likes cooking with you SO MUCH, and even if she's not cooking with you, she'd be standing there just to see you cook. She'd give you hugs and kisses and other stuff (you would end up not finishing the food and just making out or fucking her instead🤭)
You, her and Tara are an amazing trio together, bffs🤞 (though you and Rosita are a bit more than bffs LMAO)
I dont have much else LMAO, might make another part if i get more ideas😘
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I finally posted something again😙 Rosita seems like she'd be such an amazing girlfriend😭 i will probably make headcanons for other characters, too (please request characters too if you want headcanons for them :3) Im currently writing 3 stories, Rosita x reader smut, Enid x reader smut and Tara x reader smut, i hope one of them is coming out next week but i cant keep promises, requests are open!! Have an amazing day <3
#the walking dead#twd fanfiction#twd x reader#rosita espinosa#rosita espinosa x reader#rositara#twd rosita#maggie greene#maggie rhee#enid rhee#michonne#twd spoilers#headcanon#headcanons#tqxky
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SOUP!!!!!!!
oh my goodness this halloween saga is INSANEEEE AND I LOVE IT SO SO SO MUCH AGHHHH😭 i’ve had one of the worst weeks ever and i seriously think that reading this saga was one of the main reasons i made it thru LMAOooo
PLS THE ANGST WAS SPECTACULAR I CANT EVEN EXPLAIN TO YOU HOW MUCH I LOVED THESE FICS. everything with vin and luke was fucking adorable I LOVE THESE BOYS and their friendship so freaking much <3 then bella with jon RAH CHEFS KISS BC??? i LOVE that she was all calm and nonchalant and caring but also super chill about it while jon was kinda dying on the inside bc he wasnt being a “gentleman”, but at the same they both stayed playful and silly <333 and THEN MY BABY GIRL MY QUEEN GETTING ROOFIED????????? EXCUSE YOU BC HOW THE HECK DID YOU MANAGE TO EXCEED MY EXPECTATIONS????? like i really cannot tell you how excited i was about this and i wasnt sure how you were gonna approach the whole getting roofied thing but i fully trusted that you’d deliver the angst, AND oh my DID YOU‼️‼️‼️‼️
leo being so protective and worried about her???? both him and bella getting ARRESTED protecting her??????? AND JON’S PANIC GOSHHHHH IT WAS EVERYTHING IVE EVER WANTED TO READ‼️‼️‼️ the lack of sympathy sickness with someone other than leo??????? THE REASSURANCE WHEN SHE WAKES UP AND THE HURT AND HELPLESSNESS WHEN SHES SO OUT OF IT AND HE CANT DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT????? THE WORRY AT THE HOSPITAL AND OMFG MY BABY VIN ALL PANICKED AND WORRIED AND BLAMING HIMSELF I CANT BREATHEEEEE 😭😭 and the arrest not being enough for him OOF I CANT DO THIS OMG THIS WAS SO FUCKING GOOD I LOVE YOUR OCs SO FUCKING MUCH SOUP😭😭😭😭😭
AND THE BELLA FIC HOLY MOLYYYYYYY😩😩😩 when i thought it couldnt get better and/or more angsty IT FUCKING DID and i enjoyed every minute of it AHHHHH🫶🏽 leo all worried and side eyeing her as he noticed something wasnt right and then giving her his jacket 😭😭😭 and then the whole conversation with luke where shes so out of it and OH MY GOODNESS WHEN SHE SPEAKS SPANISH WITHOUT REALISING IT‼️‼️‼️ THE WAY YOU INCORPORATED THAT WAS SO REALISTIC AND INSANE AND AMAZING AND TERRIFYING AND THEN SHE JUST PASSES OUT?????? HELLO I NEED TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS TO MY GIRL AHHHH THIS WHOLE SAGA WAS CRAZY GOOD IM OBSESSED.
for real thank you so much for writing this and thus making my shitty week a lot less shitty❤️🩹 bc i swear that reading these restored the very much needed happy chemicals in my brain when nothing else could 😭🫶🏽
side note the whole ✨unknowingly speaking spanish✨ situation is so insane and important to me bc, as an international college student in the U.S. who plays a contact sport where it’s common to get concussions, this is LITERALLY ONE OF MY BIGGEST FEARS and OMFG you described the panic and confusion and fear (and just this whole situation im terrified of) SO fucking well AGHHHHH i know i say it all the time but YOU’RE SO FREAKING TALENTED DUDE PLS NEVER STOP WRITING 😩🫶🏽
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Otter!! Hi!!
I adore your wall of texts sooo much!
I'm so sorry you had a crappy week Otter 🥺 I hope it's better now or at least that it's gonna start looking up soon!
It's funny you mentioned the unknowingly speaking spanish thing, because I do that all the damn time. English is not my first language but daily I find myself switching to english and then just being?? So confused when the people around me are not understanding.
End of the day, don't freak out if that does happen to you. Gestures is an universal language. You've got my whole heart as another bilingual person in the interwebs.
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Give me A D and L of your Twisted OCs do it
ty for always enabling me and my twst crimes despite not twsting yourself kjdsfj 🧡
also tagging @cosmiccoincidence ty for the double enabling WOO
ok here's the sketchy whatever i did 2night, was gonna do some basic colors but i got sleeeepyyyy so maybe tomorrow ill do that lol
HEHFHSFEHFJK anyway. alda beloved none of this will make sense to u so ill try to give spark notes explanations as i go but. these two goobers are rsa [royal sword academy - the rival school that seems to be more based on the Good Guy™ disney characters rather than the main school's villains lol] students.
the very short summary is guy on left (Char - I looked thru sooo many names for him and that's the one i ended up on lol. some twst names are really on the nose like VIL for the EVIL QUEEN so why cant i use char!) is cater diamond's [a canon character who's said to have moved around a lot] childhood friend from when they were like 5 but lost contact w/him. Dañarte (literally not a name. it's spanish for 'hurt you' and it only came up/his existence spawns from a typo turned autocorrect in a message i was sending my frined and we just kept it for funsies and i made a character out of it lol 😭) is his shady cousin that has a charming friendly appearance but is going to cause problems on purpose bc hes a bitter baby or whatever.
i have a lot more details w/them and their connection with BESTIE CATER but that's not what the ask was about so i will HOLD BACK!!! for now.
ok answering the actual questions under a cut bc blahblahblahblah
A) Why are you excited about this character?
because!!! i see a lot of people make really creative twst ocs based off other disney characters and i think that's SO FUN!!!! i dont really think i myself am very creative of a person, but this was something i kinda got to have fun with. i had the initial thought with char based off one random fanart I saw like forever ago, so i borrowed the starting idea and then just completely ran off with it to do my own thing, SPIN MY OWN WEB!!!! [i think the fanart was like, just some random rsa guy recognizing cater; it was japanese fanart so i had limited google translate on my side - idr if the childhood friend thing was part of it or if that's just a thing my brain decided to fill in the blanks?? anyway i went from there / designed my own random guy / started LORE BUILDING and EXPANDING]
also their involvement is very much a soap opera esque TEEN ROMANCE DRAMA which i think is funny. a lot of this came from just talking to my friend in discord cuz there was no engtwst at the time and she was the only person i knew that i could talk to about twst, so even tho these are my characters, it's something that spawned from me going ham in our discord messages and us bouncing ideas off each other and just havin private fun. unrestrained goofs!!!
D) Have they always had the same physical appearance, or have you had to edit how they look?
HMMMM well according to all the doodles i'd compiled in one spot, it does look like i just went with my initial ideas for both of em and kept it. they r not that deeply thought out bc i am Not much of a designer - god bless the school uniform i could steal so i didnt have to come up w/clothes kfjlsdf. and tbh theyre pretty basic right now so for all i know, maybe this is the prototype. maybe they've yet to go through their first evolution. WHO KNOWS!!!! but in their case, their existence came more from the SOAP OPERA DRAMA storyline i came up with, and wasn't so much based on appearance/character design. i mostly just had doodles and sketchy concepts just so i could continue to doodle parts of said story for funsies to send my friend on discord lol
BESTIE THERE IS NO L!!!!! instead of asking u what u meant im just gonna assume u meant I since lowercase L looks like uppercase I 😌 SO YOU'RE GETTING I!!!
I) Do you prefer to keep them in their canon universe?
ya lol. this 'story' is very much based off like a few lines of canon lore that i just SPRINTED OFF with. drag and dropping these 2 guys into the story - not really related to much of the main story, but just kinda there to cause more teen drama. for funsies.
ANYWAY THANKS FOR ASKING LOVE U BOTH BYE!!!!!!
[x]
#gaminegay#cosmiccoincidence#asks#twisted wonderland#twst oc#cereal tries to draw#ummmmmmmmmm!!!!!#how come i was trying to be brief and concise and i still Talked So Much#i held back a lot of details. and yet.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#covers my face anyway bed time bye!!!#ocs#oc: char#oc: Dañarte
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Trueee trusting people can be super hard especially when you've been hurt multiple times before. It's okay to be cautious and take your time letting people in. The ones who are meant to be in your life will understand and be patient with you :)
Also omg your native language is Spanish? That's so cool!!! I find that language to be really romantic
And don't worry too much about the English stuff. Being fluent doesn't mean you have to know every single word perfectly. Mixing up phrases happens to everyone, native speaker or not. Do you have a preference between the two or do you feel equally comfortable in both?
One time I was chatting with this British person and I was completely lost 'cuz they were talking so fast and their accent was so thick I could barely understand a word 😵💫
I straight up just left from the call without saying anything... HAHAHA
Thank gosh it was a group thing so they probs didn't even notice I was gone 😭
Oh and my pride month plans they're basically just to make more queer friends online and maybe chat more with my irl queer friends too. Tbh there's not a whole lot going on around here. I've never actually been to one of those big pride parades. Have you?
Also what's your pride month plan? ^_^
From ♡
Awe thank you :,) and I've been told I sound kinder in spanish or that I seem like a different person but I don't do it on purpose🥲 so idk what they mean but also even though I think it be romantic too, I've never used it on someone. As in I've never been with someone who I've spoken sweetly to in spanish not even my ex I was with almost 4 yrs, plus i didn't want to lol, i dont think i had that much chemistry with her to bring that out of me. Plus she wouldn't even let me play mexican music, honestly I never used my spanish around her unless I was translating, it genuinely made me sad cuz if I translated or spoke more in spanish to my family then my accent would stick she would say "why do you sound like that now, you didnt sound like that" and id say i cant help it if im switching my brain back and forth so I kinda just stfu now lol or I try to focus when I switch back
But yeah i prefer spanish and I think I'm slightly better at writing,speaking and word knowledge in spanish plus when I feel things strongly i genuinely have a hard time saying it in english so if i dont end up saying it in spanish i just get quiet. or if I get high or drunk I might completely forget I'm supposed to speak English I've done it to my bestie lmao 💀
Also lmaoooo you being like nvm and then leaving is funny af I should do that more often instead of pretending ik what the fuck they say.
Those sound like good pride month plans!! I need to see if there is events near me I know in the city there is but it's like 2 hrs away and about 3 to get to the major one where I think they have pride parade there too. Yes I've been but only once. I might just focus on at home things this month tho I'm currently out of the country 😅
#do you know other languages? :) btw i do hope you end up having so much fun!#you mentioned being high femme right? so do you have any special way of dressing if you went to pride?#pride month#happy pride 🌈#anon#asks#lmaoo before you ask why i would stay that long when they wouldnt make effort with my culture or language its cuz i overtry lmao#i learned from that tho but unfortunately now someone would have to try hard for me to believe them#happy pride yall!!!
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I’m still suffering but I’m back✌🏽 Have you seen that meme that says “Cuando vea ____ no diré nada, pero habrán señales” (when I start watching ____ I won’t say anything, but there’ll be signs)?, that will be both of us with OP when we get that third piercing on our left ear LOL
And boy, yes, they have been in that dessert for way too long LMAO like I don’t wanna miss everything so I’m not skipping any parts, but I’m definitely watching at x1.25 speed bc I’ve just realized this arc lasts until 130 and I’m not even on the 20s😭
Iñaki’s and Taz friendship definitely cured some of the sadness in my soul, but same I would to get more sneak peeks behind the work. I have watched some videos about the make-up and wig work, the staging and props, I saw some performance proposals for Zoro’s introduction and I love how despite changing many things, they never gave up on including the middle finger LOL I just find very interesting the process of discerning which ideas make it into the final product, I’m a nerd what can I say😔✌🏽
SANJI AND CHOPPER CARRIED THE CREW IN THIS ARC they were very impressive😌✨ but okay mini rant that you might find funny since you’re clearly far ahead LOL 1) the heck no one d*es HAHAHA LIKE everyone. somehow. miraculously. comes back alive and I’m glad for the good guys, but damn people it feels like only Arlong and people from the backstories d*ed 2) again, glad no one from the crew d*es (for now?😭🤞🏽) but boy does it hurt to see them getting thrashed :c </3
I did enjoy Ace’s appearance respectfully<3 LOL but seeing Zoro smiling and laughing more frequently definitely does something to my brain<3 Also!! Saw you got your wisdom teeth removed: congratulations!!🥳✨ and since Spotify wrapped just happened, what’s your song #12?? Was going to ask based on the episode of OP I’m at but it’s already the 100s so the last two digits will do LOL
LMFAOOO if that ain't me. also wait do you speak spanish or this is like, the meme you know LSDKHGKL it's very important to me as a spanish speaker because i have one stupid ass op video i can't show anyone because it's in spanish and i've been going insane because it made me cackle (but also would have to ask what's your stance on shipping (not like hardcore i will fight others if they don't like what i like but like hehe their dynamic is fun))
honestly i respect you so much for not skipping anything because i just skimmed through over 10 episodes worth of someone's backstory (they've been dead for a long time so i'm like 🧍♀️ we didn't learn anything new with this but the lore is great i guess)
had no idea about that LMAO honestly it fits zoro so much that no matter what he was going to be flipping someone, actually that's something that i love about the live action like yeah let him and sanji curse we know these two idiots are the worst when it comes to cursing LMAO part of me is hoping that we'll get like a documentary kinda thing with the behind the scenes or maybe more behind content for the second season
NO BUT THAT'S SOMETHING I'VE BEEN COMPLAINING ABOUT AS WELL, like yay for the main crew not dying i won't have psychological damage because of it, but what do you MEAN not a single bad guy dies either some of them should've had their heads chop off give me a break
pre time skip zoro was so goofy and beloved truly a gift, god i can't wait for you to get to a certain part and lose your mind about him tho LMAO and i diiiiid! finally have all of them out, this last one is not bothering me as much so i'll take that as a win as well and i'm just happy to be done with the whole thing LMAO and my #12 song is tití me preguntó by bad bunny which honestly, a bit shocked by because i didn't think i listened to it that much. what's your 81 song i gotta know 👁👁
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5 Jan u ary 2023 Thursday jueves 6:27 am pdt part 2
6:28 am pdt
my youngest sister when 1 or 2 years old runs into glass shelf corner of display tower? In clothing store 🏬 (I’m almost 2.5 years older)
Her oldest son around same age (1 or 2 years old) was holding onto dog 🐕 and dog stopped 🛑 abruptly and he ran/stumbled into the probably brick 🧱 wall (under a window 🪟?) was New York.
Her 2nd child 👶 also a boy, now more than a year old, born during COVID, recently dropped cell phone 📱 on floor, with my face on face time and stomped on the cellphone 📱. The Then away from the cell phone I think 🤔 he started crying 😭 I asked what happened, and my sister said he smacked his face/head into the floor. Seemed hard and rough to me. Demonic possession and generational curses.
I had a crush 😻 on a boy when I was in kindergarten and bcz I didn’t know what to say I pushed him when we were on the soft grassy field. Might have gotten the wrong idea from the devil 👿, maybe through him and bongo the bear cartoon movie 🎥 say love 💕 with a slap 👋. He didn’t cry or seem hurt but he said he was going to tell on me.
3rd grade year? After 9th birthday party 🥳, I say something I didn’t plan to to my crush 😻 and I’m too surprised at what I say. Didn’t seem to come from me - the devil 👿 possessed my mouth 👄/voice. 6:48 am pdt. He gets mad at me and pushed me when I was on Barbie roller skates 🛼. I landed 🛬 on my wrist and it broke went to doctor 👨⚕️ and got a cast on it.
When I’m around 11/12 years old mom’s first car got hit and the car spun. I got whiplash and my mom got a goose egg 🥚 bump on her head.
Also around 11/12/13? (Years old, 7:04 pm pdt 6 January, thought 💭 I remembered wearing a skiort and maybe white t-shirt I got middle school years w/ embroidery? Scallops detail on u-neckline (7:07 pm pdt #3 😖)) Tried to learn how to ride bicycle 🚴🏼 without training wheels and I flew over the 🚴🏼 bike’s handle bars and land like an airplane ✈️ on the sidewalk? On my shoulders. I almost hit my head first but I pulled up my head enough to not.
got mad 😡 at youngest sister when should not have for doll’s neck breaking and raised thin cardboard Barbie doll box 📦 to hit her on top of the head. She started crying 😭 before the box touched her head. I t was soon after separation of parents. Don’t recall any prior time of hitting her, especially the head. Was probably stilll 8 years old.
before 4th grade photos/picture day fell from tallest bar in school 🏫 playground across the street from shirleys house 🏠
6:58 am pdt I have a lot to recall and might need to edit. Tired 😓 😴 6:59 am pdt
8:06 pm pdt 8:07 pm pdt they’ve been burning my skull 💀. I believe they are trying to make my skull weak so they can easily crush my head. Incubus + company. 8:08 pm pdt
6 January 2023 Friday 2:06 pm pdt
my mom put her hand on my forehead and it was too hot! 🤬😱😭 incubus + company leave my mom alone! She’s my only person! Leave her alone! You don’t own us! You are fiends! Demonic! My mom work so hard and has been through a lot in her life! She could have married young and to a richer man but she didn’t whether she knew it or not (she said she didn’t know he was rich until after his shot gun marriage to his ex-gf) she went to school! She had a hard life you’ve done too much to her! LEAVE HER ALONE!!!!!!!!! You’re all the worse creatures in the UNIVERSE!!!! You already put her through brain surgery!!!!! LEAVE HER ALONE!!!!! JERKS YOU ALL ARE!!!!! 2:15 pm pdt incubus is the cause of all illness/disease/ailments. 2:17 pm pdt
5:12 pm pdt several (s eve r al/ eve r y ...) minutes ago felt pain in skull behind left ear. Found a big dip forming. Found the black pen I’ve been using in the corner of blue Spanish dictionary and I opened it to the page. Bottom of page 137 where the pen was is the word “drilling.”
5:17 pm pdt incubus/demon lord and people similar to them who are probably in covenant with them, they probably DON’T feel and don’t think and don’t believe the same way and things that a lot of us have been brought up to believe. They form no attachments to anyone. They will easily double cross anyone and then spin it around and say you double crossed them, even though they with hold live from you in all sorts of ways, such as withholding direct communication, using triangulation through signs. If he wants to have s*x/be promiscuous with a lot of other women - and the law is in California as far as I know it’s a one-to-one deal on marriage and there are other more formal contracts in addition to that for adoption/surrogacy probably/artificial insemination, Et cetera - then why we would have any reason to believe that s*xual intercourse/kisses/embraces/caressing/painting a picture with my hands 🎶🎼🎵🎤🎸 would be promise of anything at all, including marriage vows bcz peopjane hermanle annull/divorce/break up. Incubus has demonstrated a kiss is only a kiss, a sigh is just a sigh 🎸🎵🎼🎶🎤 it doesn’t mean anything to him. He’s got his hands, tongue, lips 💋👄💄😋👅🖕✋🤚and 🍆p*nis in many women. Jane Herman (something in the song this love probably fingering) Rebecca ginos - 1st night they met, Anne V (Russian vogue magazine and heard something that another source said he talked about the contraception? Methods? (Don’t know - pulling out??) (stomach gurgled 😞😖), Candace Bailey in goodnight goodnight there was real tongue 👅 kissing 💋 in that! They rolled around under sheets almost naked and with the hints that they took off each other’s underwear 🩲 it looks it frankly that they aren’t trying to hide it! 5:39 pm pdt now she’s married to someone else??? It doesn’t matter to him. He will double cross if he wants to. 5:40 pm pdt no attachments. He is a whore with no love 💗 in his heart. 5:40 pm pdt. Don’t be fooled. 😞😖😭😤🥵😤🥵 it doesn’t matter how attractive you are they will ALWAYS cheat. 5:42 pm pdt.
They are animals who believe in their superiority even though there are twins 👯♂️ and doppelgängers. Sam Clemens/mark twin prince 🤴 and the pauper. Did life imitate art or art 🖼 imitate LIFE!? 5:43 pm pdt. They rely on trickery which involves complex ? Psychology???? They are not capable of real love friendship intimacy??? That’s why incubus comes to rape while sleeping 🛌 putting her in a trance like state??? Like a puppet!!😖😞😫😤🥵😤🥵😤😭 5:47 pm pdt
6:13 pm pdt
instagram
6:15 pm pdt
instagram
6:18 pm pdt probably a “joke” about incubus:
instagram
6:19 pm pdt
6:20 pm pdt caption said: No face no case 🌚
6:21 pm pdt
7:01 pm pdt auto-lock is still stuck on 30 seconds. I getting tired 😴 a lot today or pre-vertigo state. 7:02 pm pdt
8:11 pm pdt it feels like they roasted my heart ♥️ I felt heat/burning inside behind the I’m between breast area and felt my heart ♥️ feel stressed and starting breathing out HOT air. My dad air brush painted hot air balloons 🎈 when I was a baby 🍼. And I think I wore onesies with hot 🥵 air balloon and another with an elephant 🐘 with trunk down. I think Jesus Christ was conned. Cat fished probably by his own dad. Sounds like a bad dad who didn’t want to pay 💰 child support and did not want to be around for him and made him sleep in mangers and endure probably hard labor and hardships and pain and suffering. “Reckless [?] abandonment” Elle woods legally blonde 👱♀️. What does reckless mean??? 8:20 pm pdt. Other kids get to grow up with slaves and harems and armies to do the dirty stuff for them but they’re also brain 🧠 washed like Uriah trying to be a loyal good soldier not “sleeping” with bathsheba his wife because of the rules he thought 💭 he should abide by. Then the king 🤴 he was loyal to plotted to kill him. Seemed like his only punishment was to lose the kid that was born during his adulery. No whipping? No death 💀 sentence on him? Special? In what way? Did bathsheba have a choice? Did she want this powerful misbehaving king 🤴 for herself? Or was she intimidated by his power? 8:26 pm pdt. Don’t trust incubus he already demonstrated he don’t care for me even though he played games trying to get on my soft side only to bite me back with abuse destruction of my body to make it absurdly ugly/unattractive and almost burned 🔥 me alive and then publicly intentionally have those words revealed and used in opposite situations than can be misinterpreted and seen under a different light 💡 than what it really is intended for (heart pain 😖) to make him look like a good guy when he’s not. More warm air exhaled. He mislead me to distract me from what he really meant, distracted me with social issues and past educational lectures and probably false intentions to someday have a more egalitarian society that respects women’s rights and other people not based on color Et cetera. That I became oblivious that he was addressing my current situation and state. Ever since I was a kid 👧 I had to learn to keep going as best I can even with pain and ailments? Such as having a period, maybe ibs, chronic eczema, Et cetera and had to try to ignore my pain. That I get caught up 🆙 in ideas 💡 that were given to me through school 🏫 and life experiences. But now I’m questioning everything! Insults, injury. He LIKES 👍 that stuff but hides it SO WELL. Don’t give them an inch!!!!!!!!!!!! 8:39 pm pdt. They’ll mess with your mind, memory, body, feelings. If they don’t want you to have something they make you forget about it, they control the thoughts 💭 that go into your head, they make you fall in love 😻 immediately even though you should wait it out to get to know someone. Feelings! Even if things seem like they are on your side only bcz of “words” look 👀 at the actions, rely on that if your body looks absurd to them and they made it that way and they roast you to the point of pain and feels like you’re heart cannot take it anymore and your dying, pay attention to that and take it to mean that they don’t like you, but they need you so they have free time to f*ck. 👌🖕🙌 8:46 pm pdt
I typed a lot of stuff but the post didn’t save the update. They roasted my head. When I was typing 💬 it. A lot of important stuff. I think they have sacrificial lamb 🐑 bcz of above and they want a “manageable” number of people to control. 11 pm
3:39 am pdt 7 Jan u ary 2023 Saturday
The boney 🦴 area between my breasts have become bumpy like I can feel the individual ribs. I don’t remember if it was like that last week. It’s been very hot for weeks in that spot. I think he’s reducing this spot so that it easily breaks. There was an article I read about Adam Levine having an accident with gym equipment? And he did something stupid with it that made it like a sling shot that hit him I think I’m that spot and it broke and he had to go to the emergency room 🚨. He said that they fixed it, probably put a clip on it to hold it together? The rib cage meeting in the center? He said it was like a harbinger. I don’t know 🤷🏻♀️ what that means. 😰 but I fear for my life. Incubus is doing everything at once to me to keep me guessing how he’s going to kill me. Hospitals 🏥 won’t help me with anything. They all hurt me. It’s best not to talk about it bcz I don’t know if talking about it enables them to take the memory away? Or if you’ve already been talking a lot all your life that it doesn’t matter? But when I review things it seems that they have controlled me all my life anyway. They controlled my nephew very well making him drop my sister’s cell phone on the ground and stomp on it when my face was on FaceTime and then they made him fall on his face and probably hurt his forehead a lot because he’s only started learning to talk. Born during COVID. I think 🤔 his first birthday 🎂 passed. 3:50 am pdt yeah life sucks. 3:51 am pdt
3:53 am pdt i was trying to type “in that spot” NOT “I’m that spot” I don’t know if that hand tattoo is near that spot or a different tattoo, but I really don’t believe that the incubus loves 💕 me. Gypsy hand ✋ was it? Gyping Eve. I’m a sacrificial lamb 🐑, my moms name has “Abel “ in it and I’m born in the sun 🌞 sign 🪧 Aries ♈️. My dads first name looks almost like Jewish for “son of.” 3:57 am pdt It’s meant to be that I have a rough life and be sacrificed. God is a con artist 👩🏽🎨. 3:58 am pdt he likes Caesar more. 3:59 am pdt
6:49 pm pdt I’m starting to wonder 💭 if a lot of pictures I saw 👀 since 2017 are photoshopped. And theater (between breasts is hot 🥵 again 😖😖 heart ♥️ pain and diarrhea 😖pain) that other people don’t see the pictures I originally saw online up until this month. It didn’t occur to me until now that all those pictures were photoshopped in that way. I believe it was made to mislead me into thinking 🤔 behati and Adam’s marriage was a lie. It was an on/off thing for me to see the pictures, juggling 🤹♀️ one idea 💡 to the other of what was going on with them. They kept me guessing the whole time and why I didn’t realize until now that that was a lie, too 😞. Nothing else makes sense now. I think they have been toying 🧸 with my memory too to make this possible. She really looks like she is into him. She looks like she likes touching him and they are all over each.
incubus mislead me intentionally with signs. I believe I have to believe an old tweet 🐣 of his that everything that is from him is bullsh*t x3. I cannot believe he would stoop so low to tell me we are married with children 👶 (7:22 pm pdt BUT it look 👀 now as if he meant it as a joke.. a joke that I am his real wife.. bcz my body IS absurd NOW bcz of them... & They have been boiling 🥵 me for years now.. it is unreal how HOT 🥵 they’ve made me that I smell 👃 like cooked meat 🥩 teriyaki crosses my mind bcz yaki =cook. Yak =ox. Ki=tree/sounds like key 🔑 🚗. Teri = tearing up 🆙 my heart ❤️ when I’m with you but when we are apart.. 7:27 pm pdt) When it’s signs 🪧 but not actual explanations he leaves 🍃 a lot of wiggle room for misinterpretation and he knows this and uses it to his advantage to lie. And then he spins it around to blame us when we misinterpreted what he meant - which actually ironically is what he wants us to (head pain 😖) believe but we don’t realize at the time bcz (7:32 pm pdt: that) the signs 🪧 can simultaneously mean something else Bcz they are signs 🪧 (symbols). 7:05 pm pdt I never 👎 told anyone that I had their children 👶 /never told anyone I was pregnant 🤰 with their children 👶 and I don’t believe I ever was pregnant 🤰, although there were 2 times in my life I skipped periods - once when I was 16 years old when I was a virgin and another time when I was still with my first real boyfriend when I was 20? (We broke up 2005, were together since ≈April/May 2004, lasted ≈1+ years, we had 2 summers together I recall I used to think in my mind but now I cannot remember how I remembered that there were 2 summers. We had one anniversary, & he was around for my sister’s graduation 👩🎓 in 2005. I had started a semester of fashion classes to see if it was what I wanted to do and he broke up with me after classes started.) And I was unhappy and thinking about breaking up with him but I didn’t know how I should approach him about it so I chickened out, but one day I let myself show him that I was upset 😭 the whole day and called him and left voicemails of myself crying and hanging up 🆙 and he took it as a cue that it was time to break up 🆙. God plans ahead. (Inside left ankle pain 😖) I think it is really unfair to lie to me like that - So I don’t think they can justify it saying it is “karma” to lie to me about it. 7:19 pm pdt 7:27 pm pdt ⬆️ 7:32 pm pdt why is it difficult to write ✍️ this correctly?? 😞 ⬆️)
7:37 pm pdt he was not a bad boyfriend, mostly he was kind. He said a few things here and there but I guess I forgive him. He fed me a lot. And at the beginning of our relationship I was given a very nice gently used futon couch 🛋 from my mom’s best friend and I gave it to him. I think 🤔 I don’t recall asking for money 💰 and I don’t recall him giving monEy 💰 for it. I don’t think I realized how much it was worth at the time. But he took me out a lot before that I think only to hang out as friends and gave me rides home 🏠. And he coincidentally was thinking of getting a new bed 🛌. 7:43 pm pdt and he took me out a lot after that. I didn’t realize until now that this was probably a deposit 💵 on our relationship (probably by god). ??? 7:45 pm pdt
8:24 pm pdt I think 🤔 I lost my virginity to my first real boyfriend when I was 19 years old. I think 🤔 I remember we always used a condom. He is kinda silly sometimes and sometimes he is serious 🧐. The s*x unfortunately was usually not satisfactory. I think 🤔 I can only recall it being satisfactory ONCE ☝️. He I think was an inch too short for me at the time. His previous girlfriend was probably a little shorter than me. I usually didn’t complain and would try again hoping next time it would do it for me. 8:30 pm pdt. I don’t know 🤷🏻♀️ if he realized that usually I don’t climax but there was one ☝️ time I thought I was on the way to climaxing and then it stopped?? I forget what happEnd exactly but I remember saying to him alluding? To that I liked that one position and to try it again and he said something that I think 🤔 alluded? To him understanding that or maybe he can tell that I haven’t been climaxing and that one moment was different and closer to climaxing. For some reason I thought that somehow he figured it out. 8:36 pm pdt and he wanted to try it again, too. 8:37 pm pdt 8:39 pm pdt he did it again messed with the time it looks like it skipped or he did something to me 8 pain gum scratch via incubus 8:40 pm pdt I already begged him so I don’t know 🤷🏻♀️ why he would put it more infront of my face. What good is trying aga??? They made fun of me when I begged this summer. 8:42 pm pdt I guess it’s going to be a rough end for me that it’s going to make me beg again 8:43 pm pdt
I have probably only Had 2 ☝️🖕satisfying s*x experiences... and I tried a lot with the first, and a lot with the 4th guy. And that’s including the experience mentioned above ⬆️. I don’t know 🤷🏻♀️ why I tried so many times thinking that it might be satisfying again... I know now they were both too short.. sorry 😓. 8:49 pm pdt. Sagittarius ♐️ incubus friend Was HUGE yet somehow there was no pleasure. Maybe 🤔 bcz I really didn’t want to, even my vag didn’t let him in with condom on and with expecting him to try. He got in when I was not expecting him to try bcz he asked if he can without the condom and I did not reply. Maybe he wadis it too fast? Maybe somehow my not wanting to somehow deactivated my pleasure sensors??? It was almost as though I were numb but I felt him moving in and out. 8:54 pm pdt. Big ≠ guarantee pleasure. In this case. 8:55 pm pdt it feels like he was only concerned with how he felt bcz of how fast he was going and i was cornered bcz he did Not respect my first “NO” type of answer. 9 Pm pdt and he didn’t respect me more for doing that without waiting for me to respond, and even further when I yelled out while he pumpEd in/out of me, “I don’t think we should be doing this!” 9:03 pm pdt
11:25 pm pdt to further clarify about the breakup with the first real boyfriend (my head is too hot 🥵) I was most likely upset that I couldn’t feel what I thought I needed to feel to make the relationship last long. I guess it was not meant to be. We were both half Asian half white, around the same age, (same high school) 🏫 same grade (didn’t hang out until college) , both lived with our mothers, and grew up with a sister. 11:32 pm pdt
11:33 pm pdt I feel very concerned that I’m only being treated as god’s piggy bank 🏦 for bone materials. 😥😤🥵😤🥵😳🥵😖😭 and have been put through a lot to keep me mostly single and at home most of the time, through: manipulating my feelings, thoughts 💭, (stomach gurgle 😖😭🐒💨 11:37 pm pdt), actions/voice, bodily functions, pain/trauma/injuries/diseases/illnesses, money 💰 situation, family, other people, Et cetera. I was shy 🙈 since probably forever: kindergarten I hung up my raincoat and hid behind it. Sometimes I would make a bad decision based on current emotions and beliefs. When my sister was born I was jealous and insecure 😞 (I m Aries ♈️ she’s ♌️ Leo ≈2.5 years apart in age. I got a 🪣 bucket put my favorite toys 🧸 in it, put on a 🧢 hat, frowned and showed them I was thinking of running away (illogically irrationally). I think we played nice for the most part: we played barbies and Nintendo most of the time together or watched tv 📺 or movies. In the car 🚗 we listened to music 🎶 and sometimes sung or played board games that were made for car trips. (11:48 pm pdt tummyaches 😖😭 diarrhea feeling. I don’t remember if I ate solids today. 11:49 pm pdt).
11:56 pm pdt incubus is the greatest source of cruelty. He has the resources to deceive effectively. I ddon’t trust him. He gives me too much diarrhea for no good reason. I think I’m becoming weaker. He seems to have this goal 🥅. He has all sorts of stories on the internet but I’m afraid it’s probably all lies/a cover up 🆙. The Jesus Christ story to calm the nerves of those he abused - designated sacrificial lambs /rams 🐑 . 12:02 am pdt I just don’t believe he had motivations to save anybody he has hurt. Like a rapist trying to hide his crimes with murder. 12:04 am pdt
12:20 am put I’m afraid that at the center of every man 👨 no matter what is greed and viscous ness and cruelty.
visciousness 12:22 am pdt
O
especially in Adam Noah Levine bcz he’s not afraid of doing cruel things to me all the while misleading me.. 12:25 am pdt. Even though my name translates to shavah/ I was trying to type chavah ... using Greek letters for the v-> nu, it is also might be the secret name of Jesus Christ which is a manipulative controlled to take advantage of people who are willing to work harder with more disadvantages. He hurts my heart and my whole body and makes me anxious with everything he does to
me and makes my family Do to me
12:32 am pdt only his own amusement matters to him 12:33 am pdt
I will forever be afraid 😱 of that man 12:34 am pdt
1:15 am pdt men have no problem killing off life, they do it everyday. 1:16 1:17 am pdt sacrifice and pleasure go hand in hand 🤚 for them. $-‘d <-what’s that????? hand 🤚 🍆💦☃️ 1:19 am pdt.
is it sane for a woman to want a monogamous relationship with such creatures?? I’m starting to think NOT. 1:21 am pdt don’t know what’s right or necessary or true.
1:22 am pdt I’m so lost now. Is jealousy an illusion and if not what purpose does it serve???? To show you care? Is it natures way of keeeping us in relationships? Is it something only a woman feels if men easily detach and find more women to have s*x with? If he does is he worth keeping??? When does the relationship exist?? Is there nothing special about being human??? If a man chooses to leave fine let him. Know that he will never be anything to you other than a special donor. 1:29 am pdt sweet nothings, we should know by now that it means No commitment. 1:30 am pdt and that’s all we will ever get. And I don’t want it anymore Bcz he scares me. And he kills me. There are parts I thought I had bones 🦴 and I don’t think I have bones there anymore. ☃️😭😭😭😭 1:33 am pdt
1/36 am pdt look at the size of his head compared to behati . That’s a lot of brains 🧠 to think of any weird scheme to get his way which is filled with greed. Viciousness. 1:37 am pdt
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Call down the hawk spoilers!!!!!! these are just random thoughts while i was reading the book maybe later i’ll write something more coherent??
BUT the tl;dr is that I liked the book, I surprisingly like Declan more, pynch made me ache and I like Hennessy and Jordan as the new characters (the others idc). There are some stuffs that made me go “oh right this is a YA book” but overall it was an enjoyable book, I look forward to the rest and i’ll draw smth soon-ish??
Also pls talk to me about this book and send me memes thank
- What i like most about siblings relationships is how different can they be, so when the Lynch brothers get this whole ass trilogy I really look forward to them not being bffs but just learning to live with one another. Anyway this roadtrip its giving me december 2018 miami trip with my brother and sister, which yeah im matthew in this scenario idc to drive lol
- Ronan: /says something passive aggressive or sarcastic me: god i missed this lil shit
- “Adam. Ronan missed him like a lung” maggie starting strong here huh
-Yes talk about those hand kinks of ronan, thats why we are here for
-Ronan’s love at first sight began with Adam’s HANDS jk but that desperate inexplicable prayer??? ugh pls love it
-If not for the tweed vest i’d have nailed how adam dresses in college in my trc lookbook djkfjdkfs the vest is good idea tho 👀👀
-”You smell like home” DJFKDFJKJKDFJKDF
-POCKET SIZE BLUE
-Ronan describing all his friends and never mentions noah: me: this is fine :)
-This Ronan is resonating too much with me even tho im a college graduate. But all this talk of being the same as he was in high school and hiding away oh boy
-”I want it too much” UUUUUUUUUUUGH I LOVE THEM
-”extraordinarily tall and extraordinarily hunched, blonde, skeletal features” ALL MIGHT??!?!??!?!?!?!?😲
-”He has a german accent” me @ my brain: don’t read it like flula dont read it like flula
-”Dreamspace” Kirby’s dream land but with ronan
-declan adding “text/call gansey” in Ronan’s routine?? Thank you Declan
-”gasoline” seriously ronan names his dream things like kojima does characters
-"ronan’s pale skin” me: ??????????????????????????????????? right im in the wrong here
-oh declan idc about you for the other 4 books but damn now i do thx maggie
-the other characters of this book are somewhat interesting but because idk about them is really hard to care haha this happens with every book i read
-oof declan laughing genuinely it hurts
-ok but I ship declan/jordan. DECLAN AND A DREAM like father like son
-Ronan and his black goo thing reminds me of death stranding, can’t unsee it
-Declan you smooth mofo wTF i want this date, someone take me to a museum and gift me a rare color pigment
-”...she was the banksy of the gallery world” i’ve never rolled my eyes so hard
-Maggie downloaded my trc lookbook and said “yeah this is Whack™ enough for adam to wear” bc im feeling self important
-Can’t believe Adam drove for HOURS on a dream thing he didn’t know how to use just to see Ronan before his bday for 3 hours and almost d-word™.
-i don’t need to learn latin, i dont need to learn latin
-I can’t translate any of this, there are some words that obviously seem similar to spanish but do they have the same meaning?🤔🤔🤔🤔
-Latin, their love language. WAIT IS THIS WHY ITS CALL ROMANTIC LANGUAGES??? jk this is not right fact check everything i say
-Ronan meeting the Hennessy girls finally and he is as rude as he can be, and Jordan too. CUT BY THE SAME DREAMED KNIFE.
-Declan is making me sad.
-fuck you niall lynch
-JORDAN FEELING BAD ABOUT TRICKING DECLAN pls girl stop it.
-Bryde if you had a physical body i’d punch it.
-Declan and Ronan at some point:
-i care more about declan than visionary and his handler ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
-MATTHEW NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO😭😭😭😭
-ok my german is shit but.......isnt versucht used for er/sie/es or with an auxiliary verb like hatte/werde/habe for ich????
-already in love with how IN LOVE declan/jordan are of each other this is tragic
-HONESTLY I SAW THIS COMING with declan being so cold to Aurora fdkjfsdkjfdskj GDI BUT HE STILL LOVES HIS BROTHERS SO MUCH.
-LISTEN, book 1: DESTROYING DECLAN, book 2: MORE DECLAN DESTRUCTION and then probably my favorite book 3: DECLAN GOES FERAL
-This starting a sentence and repeating it but only changing the end is fucking with my short attention span brain, idk if im re-reading the same sentence like i do when my brain does anything but read or a new sentence. Is this common writer technique???
-GDI IDK WHATS HAPPENING i mean ofc niall made a copy of himself, wait no was it a copy of ronan? DID HE COPY DECLAN’S MOM?? dkjdfjkdf idk
-ok but Jordan is so in love with Declan my heart😭😭 she cares for him too
-so this is the book we all join the declan protection squad huh??
-”Lindenmere loved him” this made me miss cabeswater😪😪
-OPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL😭😭😭💖💖💖💖 i thought she was dead, she is so happy to see ronan GOD IM DRAWING THIS
-Ronan is so terrible at explaining things is both hilarious and frustrating
-I know maggie said opal is like a pet to ronan, but im gonna ignore that HARD
-Dreamscaper is like a game of ronan’s life fkjfsjsk this has nothing to do with the book haha
-can ronan materialize bryde into a punching bag???
-DECLAAAAAAAAN
-gdi he is soooooo gentle and sweet with jordan even after he confirms she is a dream
-happiness for declan 2k19 last wish of the year
-that was the awkwardest knuckle bumping ever, i have second hand embarrassment
-omg what is this a romance novel and declan is the hero???! ON MY FANTASY YA???
-DONT TOUCH MATTHEW
-sundogs....i mean you can do better?? SolarHounds beamcanine ok whatever nvm
-poor jordan :(
-declan broken like this??? He feels soooo young someone protect this child MAYBE HIS MOM
-sargento. thanks this confirms my hc that blue is latina bc i said so
-pffft what if dreamers can contact each other in dreamspace like sense8 and they all chill with each other. Ronan dreaming about adam’s hands and then hennessy is like “lol kinky”
-ooooor?? everyone has a beach, yeah im not letting go that death stranding comparison
-the end of the world trope is so overdone in YA but i like it when its done well so far i like this, but ofc there are 2 more books
-THEY HAVE SUCH A SOFT SPOT FOR MATTHEW same tho??
-can declan and ronan HUG?!
-i like ronan with hennessy, he seems more honest. Not his "evading telling the truth" honest, but actual truthfulness. Although is a bit weird/unsettling
-adam is OKAY and safe with gansey and blue ready to keep ronan safe
-RONAN AND HENNESSY NEW BEST FRIENDS
-everytime Great Falls is mentioned i read Gravity Falls instead
-"a sword that glows?" THE MASTER SWORD. Great idea given em swords it tickles my rpg/medieval love
-KAVINSKY YOU MENTION KAVINSKY BUT NOT NOAH??
-"one man 3d printer" maggie you comedian
-aw ronan is the sun and hennessy the moon awwwwwwww
-the hoverboard, what is this back to the future?
You got this far here is your ⭐ lets go to the mall on our hoverboards
#cdth#call down the hawk#cdth spoilers#llllllllllllllloooooooooooooooooooong post#trc#the raven cycle#sorta#ronan lynch#anne has THOUGHT#i took forever to read this#dont send me art#i wanna draw the new characters#and declan??#as i imagine them#maybe#!!#iread
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