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serenequeenofeverything · 8 months

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Daily pull-a-card reading

Daily pull-a-card, is a daily tarot reading in which ill pull one card for every group.

Disclaimer: sometimes i might pull an extra card or two that i wont mention but will definitely take into consideration.

Lots of grammar mistakes ahead bc fuck english.

For September 8-9th 2023

Group i, ii, iii, iv, v, vi

The high priestess

U seem to be very connected and in touch with ur emotions, you are at ur peak intuition-wise but why do i see you doubting urself? Why are u so unsure? Almost ur not giving urself the benefit of the doubt, actually quite the opposite. You are not sure of urself whatsoever, but im here to tell what the universe (god, the angels or whatever u believe in) wants you to know : you are on the right path. U are exactly where u r meant to be. U are as connected to ur higher purpose as one can be. There is nothing to fear. You are on the right path. Your own path. Trust yourself a bit more.

A song recommendation (which i reallllllllly urge to listen to bc u cant imagine how strongly this came through, U MUST LISTEN TO IT) :

Ten of wands (r)

Let go of it. The burden you are carrying is not worth it, i don't exactly know what it is, it might or might not be important but here's the thing love, you are more important. U r really precious, u truly don't deserve to carry this baggage, it is just weighing you down. So free yourself, love. I know u can do it, you too know too. My bird of paradise, fly.

A song recommendation that i really wish u to listen to:

iii

The world

My god, you are the girl. Darling you ARE THE GIRL. honestly i dont even need to advice u, all im gonna say, you are the girl. you are the one, i truly truly love your energy. Baddest bitch in the game lmaoo.

I said im not gonna advice you, but i cant stop me, so here it goes, STOP LOOKING INTO THE PAST. What's past is past. Fuck him, fuck them, they didnt deserve you. Look ahead so much is waiting for you, somewhere is waiting for you. And this time, they will deserve you. U will watch it begin again, only better.

A song recommendation that i NEED you to listen to (make sure u listen to taylor's version only tho 🔪🔪)

9 of swords

Hey love, listen to me very carefully, YOU CANT BALANCE IT ALL. whatever you are trying to balance, is taking a toll on you. It's too much work and it's fucking you up mentally. It's too much and read to this even more carefully YOU ARE NOT TO BLAME. Ur only human. Either give one of it up, or just free yourself from both( i suggest this). Life is much more than this situation that you are in. And there's better days to come. But you take this decision. U need to take this decision.

A song recommendation that im certain you already know but i think would a good awakening for u :

Knight of cups

He is very close. Nearly here. And my god, ur night in his shinning armor is one hell of a night ( THE BEST INTENTIONS LITERALLY ) . Idk girl what u have been manifesting, but that shit is CLOSE, very freaking close. My advice? Just keep doing whatever ur doing. U r doing good, and u will do even better.

Song recommendation(huh... interesting, idk i got this song, but it came very strongly, so listen u never know what's in it for u) / interestedly three things came on strong 1. "Combat" 2. " they see right through me, can you see right through me" 3. "Cause all my enemies started off as friends"

Page of wands

Oh my god, this was like the messiest group everrr! Here's the thing lmao u got many cards, but it just kept going back and forth but one thing im certain about is the page of wands energy all over you. So this group are just very young compared to the rest, or just not in control of their life whatsoever.

For some i see patents getting divorced, families arguing, not very good home environment. And then there's u, amidst all this mess, the shinning one. U have many goals, you are a seeker and a dreamer, u want more. Im hearing " an art deco, Shining like gun metal" and u want more. U want more for you, u want the light, the fame and everything else too. A hungry soul.

" i want my cake and i wanna eat it too"

My advice? It dont matter. U will do as u wish, no one can stop u nor change you. U remind me too much of myself, i know ur ache.

Your song recommendation? Art deco. That song describes you perfectly.

Anyways now that's over, y'all better follow me, i mean who will do u better than i?

Alsooo u can always submit what u want me to do a reading on next by simply commenting ur subject of interest ( no private readings bro i aint got no time for that)

Anyways peace out, bye.

#occult #pac reading #tarot #tarotdaily #pick a pile #pick a picture #pick a card reading #pick a photo #free tarot #daily tarot #tarot reading #free tarot reading #song recs #red taylor’s version #lana is god #lana del ray lyrics #lust for life #Spotify

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ca-suffit · 5 days

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yeah anon I don't want to publish ur specific ask for the reasons u said, but thank u for reminding me of this post. this post from nalyra-dreaming was part of the affirmative action drama and I think a lot of what's in this post got lost out being talked about because of that. so let's talk about it. let's comb thru this so ppl can rly understand nalyra's racism and what they're defending when they want to defend her.

first off, lol take ur own advice. but anyways. this way of speaking is crazy. this is why this whole group of besties put everyone off as time went on. that's why it's lol when ppl come to me saying nobody likes u, we prefer them. okay?? ur weird and u like being yelled at idk. these ppl read some dumb books and think they work on the show. they reference each other's fanon more than anything else. there's no discussions. they talk AT u. it's a bunch of ppl who want to be seen as smart and popular. that's it lol. "we've been trying to tell them" girl u don't work on the show stfu.

this bitch is a whole bitch. u act like u have been victimized by a black fan because you had a disagreement. u play up "I tried to listen and I agree too! poor me, THEY don't want to hear anything else but what THEY want to hear :(" and THEN u have the fckn audacity to say shit like why aren't u all listening to BLACK MAN JACOB ANDERSON. why aren't u listening to black fans? why are u here making this post to act like a victim to "mean" black fans who just don't listen to facts and logic and jacob anderson himself. why are u here twisting this shit up to pretend u have empathy for black ppl by stepping over everyone here (who does not have to filter anything for show press) and saying "actually ur all wrong and stupid and ur the REAL racists because u take away jacob and bailey's own voices."

this is a real level of fucking evil racist shit and why I'm spelling this out rly slow rn so u all understand.

"Louis is not chained to his coffin guys, he could have left, and a fight which shows off power discrepancies within the show story line is not automatically domestic abuse."

u jump thru so many hoops for lestat's defense it has made u dumb as fuck.

where was louis supposed to go? he's black, his family hates him, his husband is a demon spawn who stalks everyone down who tries to leave. who BEAT HIS ASS already at the *thought* that he'd even leave. that's not DV?? he could have left?? how are u like 50 years old and victim blaming like this and then saying u have authority over analyzing these books for the peasants here lol.

the favorite go to line from this dumb group is "they're monsters" "they're vampires." anne rice was famous in the first place for using iwtv to humanize vampires. I think she used this type of "logic" over time too tho and that's prbly where this comes from. it's a bad excuse tho. we're talking about DV but u say it's not DV and then say "they're all murderers anyway so nothing matters." girl the redemption isn't about vampirism, it's about whiteness. u big fucking dummies who can't talk about race always want to pretend this is about lestat being a vampire and how we're too stupid to understand vampires and monsters. the horror of lestat rn is his whiteness. the horror is the power that gives him as he's the least capable of rational thought in that whole "family" unit. he's ignorant, controlling, and quick to anger. he never tries to fix his ignorance, he makes excuses for all his behavior because he CAN. because society allows him to do that! louis and claudia can't make any mistakes or be forgiven because black ppl are not given that same grace. u can call lestat a monster because on a white man that's still an attractive quality. ppl LUV white serial killers and abusers so much and hype them up like they're galaxy brain heroes. calling a black person a monster is just every day. with no benefit. that's the one u rly believe is the threat and then u shoot to kill.

she's so dumb omfg. isolation doesn't mean put in an empty room. lestat wove himself into every aspect of louis' life so that louis could not exist without him. yes, on a level, louis was showing off his man, but u see how the "roots" take hold more and more over time. he's living in lestat's house, lestat is now the one driving the car. more and more lestat is telling them what they're doing and becoming critical of what louis will not give up. acting up v loudly when he doesn't get his way (he brings antoinette in when louis isn't "acting right" so he can torture louis at his job so he'll fix himself already, then he "allows" louis to see other people except now I'm gonna overreact about that too, now I've chased claudia off but btw did u know I've always had a big dick and u not being fun for me anymore is why all of this has ever happened??)

again with the evilness of trying to prove ur shit point by saying "if u disagree with me then u hate black people (jacob anderson) even tho I'm speaking over all black ppl here with this post." ok lestat lol. u are always trying to excuse lestat's actions for being what they are by saying there's a book reason behind it or saying louis or whatever black or brown character is the REAL abuser. do u think abuse has to be intentional to count as abuse? do u rly think lestat's actions are justified when he could have easily explained any of it without doing all that? his response to louis' depression is to do everything I wrote above. u think that's not abuse? u think that's not isolation? "be my companion" but he didn't mean emotionally. u don't think that's maybe the arc lestat is going to have to go thru to be a better partner to louis? what do u think his arc is then, louis just made it all up and soon we won't have to care about race and lestat has been a cool guy this whole time just kidding?? anne rice rly gave u a smooth ass brain.

I don't even know what this means. u all love to skip over points and just say "okay SWEETIE u just don't understand dark themes and monsters, u won't ever get it." okay U, SWEETIE, ur 50 years old, talk slow for me. I know u can do it. if u want authority then prove u know ur shit. a loud voice by itself doesn't do anything but yell. but this is all mama rice taught u tho. so here we are lol.

"everything is unreliable narration except for lestat who is always telling the truth because his egotistical crazy ass white woman author who wanted to be a white man so badly and wrote in his voice IRL to yell at ppl for real said he's telling the truth" u are all so crazy and racist and then u get big mad when ppl notice how crazy and racist u are lol. this gap between series airing has been annoying af but it's sure exposed ur asses because ur not smart like u think u are. when someone rly shows up and breaks down ur arguments to ur face and that is the sole reason I'm here, u all have nothing to say anymore. so fuck u lol enjoy this well earned fallout.

#interview with the vampire #amc interview with the vampire #interview with the vampire amc #iwtv amc #amc iwtv #iwtv 2022 #fandom racism #nalyra-dreaming

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averagetmntfan · 4 months

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it’s crazy that 2023 is almost to an end! Another year that just flew by!

I’ll be honest, I was desperate to post my art somewhere. It’s been kinda a rough couple of years for me. And recently.

I was extremely sad last year. Around this time, actually. Let me paint a picture.

Last year, I switched schools. Which I guess doesn’t sound like a big deal, but it was to me. My whole life was at my other school. My friends. They were the best. As u can probably imagine, I starting at a brand new school is hard. Especially when everyone already knows eachother. This might come as a shocker, but I’m kinda Anti-social when it comes to ppl around my age. (Especially cuz ppl my age are such bitches Lmao) for the longest time, I coped using discord And tik tok. I Even made my own little group. But ofc, that had to come to an end too. after that, I was sad again. For the longest time I had all these ideas, but no one to really share them with.

(cuz none of my irl friends like nor watched tmnt) and recently I ended a friendship w/ someone. We were both in the wrong, I’ll admit. I did say somethings behind her back. Nothing too bad. But it did call her a hypocrite. Because she would always complain about our other friends leaving to hang out w/ other ppl. When she does the exact same thing. And I was alone. Alone at lunch. Just sitting there. She would treat me so..rudely. Just plain rude. I asked her a question (Idk what is was exactly) and she responded with such a rude response. And that was on fucking Halloween. (Which I was sick on) so that’s when the entire friendship fell to shit.

Since then I’ve been hanging out by myself in the library (well, the times it’s open anyway) so u can probably imagine how I feel. Then one day, it all changed. I discover this wonder escape. Tumblr. I signed up and made this acc. And I met such amazing ppl on it.

@allyheart707: has given me good advice on my little comic series, genially super nice, fun to chat w/. I think I’ve been mutuals w/ her for the longest.

@ghosty-0w0: very silly, I have so much fun doing art collabs w/ you!! Again, very nice and thoughtful. Mutuals for a bit but it feels longer!!

@mikey-rottmnt: the ultimate silly, whiteboard was to much fun (I’m gonna try and make another board for us lol), I have no idea how we became mutuals lmao. Very fun to chat w, always open to listen, caring and sweet. I enjoy having conversations w/ u!

@c00kietin: I had a lot of fun drawing u!!!, Irish gang 🍀☘️, that one time I didn’t get sleep was chaotic, very chill, a local amphibia fan!! I wanna talk more w/ u, cuz ur js so cool!!

I Hope y’all have an amazing new year! May the year bring u luck, kindness, adventures (hopefully) not artblock, and alot of ideas!! (Not that anyone of u need them, cuz ur so creative!!)

and dw..Hehe..I will make u all suffer w/ ANGST ANGST AND…fluff. JK MORE ANGST >:))

(no but real talk I will not js do all Angst I swear—)

I APOLOGIZE FOR THE OTHER MUTUALS THAT IK AND ARENT ON HERE, ITS CUX I FORGOT UR TAGS!!!

#<3 #jj rambles #jj rants #Jj…vents??#Happy new year!#2024 :0

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hyuk4sbf · 2 years

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txt as best friends 😔

this is so cute and literally my fave thing to talk abt aaaaahhhhh!!

yeonjun’s the friend who gives u upfront honest advice on your outfits, who throws his own clothes at u because no ur not going out looking like that!!!! he drives to your house when u send him a message about being sad, picking you up and taking u to get food and talk abt whatever’s bothering u :( he doesn’t care what hour of the day it is, he’ll be there!!! will let u play whatever music u want on the drive and compliments every song u pick!

soobin as a bestie i think would be very affectionate, and very attentive!!! attentive because he gets into all your interests, he wants to know what u like and why u like it, and most of the time he’ll end up liking it too!!! tell him every detail and he’ll recite it back to u weeks later! hes a good listener, so if u ever need someone to just listen rather than give u feedback, he’s ur guy!!!!

beomgyu is always eager to make u laugh. he’d love playing games with u online and discording until the sun is rising and his eyes sting from prolonged screen time. he knows when to be serious, so if ur ever having a bad day he 100% knows how to dial it down and do whatever he can to make u feel better !! will send u the stupidest videos unprompted, random shit he sees on his timeline that brings him to tears from laughter and he decides you need to see it too, even if u only send a simple ‘wtf’ in return

taehyun as a best friend would be fun and humbling. u can tell him absolutely anything!! just expect him to give u his honest opinion and even more honest advice. that being said, he will absolutely bitch with u at sleepovers about people u don’t like until u both eventually pass out. gossiping with u and making fun of each other is his favourite thing in the whole world he wouldn’t change a thing!

hueningkai as a bestie would be so excitable!!! he’s so happy to talk and talk about ur mutual interests, despite getting a little bashful sometimes that he might be talking too much. once u reassure him tho he’s back at it!!! he’s the type of friend to get some gut feeling of when ur having a bad day, and immediately makes sure to message u to check in!!! hugs u so tight ur afraid ur bones r gonna pop out when he sees u on a bad day :( my sweetheart

inbox here<3

#txt fluff #beomgyu fluff #yeonjun fluff #soobin fluff #taehyun fluff #hueningkai fluff #hueningkai x reader #beomgyu x reader #taehyun x reader #yeonjun x reader #soobin x reader #txt x reader

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transzilla · 1 month

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listen i dont know if ur the guy for this- but ive been examining my dysphoria and apparently i view my disabilities (and yk how i have to act bcuz of them) as emasculating and im not sure how to break thru that? i mean any kind of 'self-care' is firmly placed as feminine in my mind which is obviously stupid but then not being able to work or having to take naps due to fatigue just adds to this feeling of emasculation and i dont know how to start unpacking it? anything vaguely similar on ur end?

I'm able bodied but unfortunately i notice this is a really common sentiment with a lot of disabled men and in my opinion isn't a trans thing at all tbh, people really will feel and be emasculated because of their disabilities. If anything we as trans men have kind of an edge over cis males because we have the sense to know that taking care of yourself isn't gay, lol. I live in a town with a high disabled population and a lot of the guys I know have gone deaf or lost mobility in their limbs from accidents at work, like this cadence is definitely something I've heard before and it's brutal especially in places where your masculinity is tied to your ability to work and be independent. Like some guys will be a hair away from completely deaf and still refuse to wear hearing protection, like they're concerned about looking like a sissy cnxndnx. You're not alone on this at all and the fact that you can grab your balls and do what you need to do and take care of urself without being a little bitch and doing something fucking stupid is highly intelligent and a sense that you have over a lot of men, LMAO.

tbh everybody should stand to learn this but the most important thing you can do is value your own opinion and your own judgement over anybody else's because genuinely what the fuck does anybody else know. Like I know very little about your situation and my advice is probably going to be dog shit because the man with the most knowledge and authority is going to be you. Knowing your limits and finding ways to work past them or work around them is being a man. Other people in your shoes wouldn't have accomplished the same things you have.

Also with work, idk if this is something that everybody says but i know a lot of people who have mobile impairments will do freelance work because you can decide all your own hours and work at your own pace, they just care about the work you get done. It's like transcripting phone calls for insurance or editing YA novels or whatever. I know ratracerebellion.com lists a lot of jobs, you have to check out the companies yourself but there's a pretty solid wealth of positions they have on there. Idk, let me know if that helps. I appreciate you sending me this and I have faith in you.

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phagvision · 2 months

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girlll where do you find girls who aren’t queer or who don’t support this queer shit n other stuff…

YOU NEED 2 GO OUTSIDE QJIXQHWKUXUW

or join some forums on da internet.. they usually have da same vision we do, i only know ONE and I used to be there a lot..but it's just miserable PLZ DONT DO THAT OKAY DONT 2 DO IT that forum just made me hopeless..but if you wanna kno da name DM ME OR SMTH 😹 also on twitter there are some accs but they're all private and it's been years so idk their @ anymore

my HONEST ADVICE.. just thug dat shit out lil bitch. talk 2 girls. make sure they knw your name, outside of your house...its scary..blah blah blah COPE. i also used to be so lame like.. i would make a move on a girl and when they pull up da queer/bi card i'd get scared 2 try anything else cause they lowkley we're all the same.. and i do have some trauma.. but some of them we're actually nice PAST DA ANNOYING SHIT... they we're cool.. nawt 4 a full on relationship/ but def to be friends with for a while or hook up in da future.

anyone else remember my incel lesbian era? im still lowkley trying 2 be normal and get past that, im over all these dumb terms..girls LISTEN lets get all clit to clit..and think about it just a little.. we need to get past that AND ACCEPT IT..we already lesbos so we're lowkley fucked. every girl nowadays is queer? what are we thinkingggg.. while men are having full on banquets we lesbians starve ouserlves to death.. STAWPPP find ur own girl and eat dat queer shit up.. you have to, at least for now.

usually i just try 2 do my own thing like go play voleyball..some sport, anything outside ! at least where i live.. girls like us are always there. they usually just stare at me, and it's very telling who is one of us and whos nawt..i have never used an dating app before, but i did met my ex on instagram, i remember she DM me first, she was a real lesbo and nawt queer brained so it can be really RANDOM, out of nowhere kinda of thing, just make sure people know yr a lesbo talk about it idfk knw but just DO YOU, be real about where you stand..but plz dont starve yrself because of it, GET LAID..don't be stupid.

just don't expect 2 much of anyone, live your life, take care of yourself YOU ARE A REAL ONE 👍

#seedavision #just_lesbo_and_real

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honeytonedhottie · 2 months

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I joined alot of grps and made online friends and now I regret. They always made me feel bad. I was friends with some kpop stans too. They attacked me when I said that I didn't like the same song as they did . They all attacked. Even a 27 yr old women attacked me and shamed for so. Why are kpop stans like this ? 😭most of the time its army and blinks ngl.There was some girl I used to talk to online friend I thought she was my friend only to realize that she was using me as an option . One day when I got into some drama and shared that with her FIRST but she behaved like she didn't understand . But when others in the grp were saying sh*t against all of a sudden she understood everything thwy said and started being angry at me. Even twisted my words and things I told her earlier. Uk why she came back and apologized ? When all her friends left her and she probably had fight with her bffs. Also when she got her friends back she would start ignoring my messages or not reply at all like she used to .

Again one more girl she was kind first but one day we had some misunderstanding .I apologized and cleared it to her as well. I even asked if it affected our friendship and she denied . But I noticed how rude and mean she became. As I said some people attacked me when I didn't like the same music as they did an she was one of those. When I shared how one actor's own wife didn't like her husband own movies doesn't mean she hates him . This girl started saying dumb stuff like " u are comparing the people u love with being an army "🗿💀 tf this doesn't even make sense tbh. Army are fans of bts and they love bts too . What was she trying to say ? Why did all got mad at me for not liking 1 song 💀💀😭😭😭😭😭😭 and made me awful for not liking it. This girl wouldn't stop saying rude stuff , she would nitpick stuff like me sharing or even just talking about stuff and saying how they all were tired of if. When the thing is the things she mentioned those people in grp were tired of , the fight fidnt even happen coz of that. She was saying really rude stuff and being mad at me. She wouldn't understand my pov and if I would try to explain myself she would be like why are you repeating yourself I mean girl ?? 💀💀Btw while I was texting her I was outside somewhere and I fell down from stairs 💀😭cuz I got zoned out when she said awful things to me. I was like " am I really that bad ?? " She attacked me. I really feel that she was just a bitch pretending to be nice at first but then she showed how toxic she was. She was online friend too.

I wonder why i didn't take stand for myself at that time 😭😭😭😭😭and listened to her rude words. They attacked me for no reason _Also last but not the least one day a girl got mad at me when I shared a video of lizzo on my story , a girl shared the same video on grouo chat . Lizzo made some unnecessary comments and I just wrote WTF LIZZO. THIS GIRL THOIGHT THAT I WAS TRYING TO PICK FIGHTS WITH HER ??? I MEANN LIKEE WHAT 😭😭😭 it wasn't even against her . It was against lizzo making disgusting comments .

These online people made me feel so bad. Alot of drama happened similar like this this is just 3% 😭I really want to know ur opinion and advice on these people and how yo deal with these ..sorry for spamming too 😭😭😭

WOW 🥹 hi anonie, my input is this ;

ppl who feel threatened by or dont let u have an individual opinion are red flags. U ARE ENTITLED TO UR OWN OPINION. anyone who disagrees or tries to shame u for it can kick rocks 💀. protect ur peace, drop them cuz they aren't good friends, and listen to music that u like 💗

#advice #honeytonedhottie⭐️#ask🌸

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voidsquidd · 3 months

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//TW// Suicide + self harm + eating disorders + abuse

-MASSIVE VENT-

Things are so bad rn omg, I hate that I feel this way at all, ik it's bad and ik it's only my fault

I don't have to be there for them, I don't have to deal with all of their fucking issues but if I don't then I feel like anything bad that happens is my own fault. And bad things do happen when I'm not there to help them. Sometimes I feel like I can't actually let them be alone for a day becuz I'm sure by the end of the day they'll be about ready to kts, and that has happened before.

We didn't talk for maybe a day and they almost offed them self in that day and almost relapsed into multiple different things, it was horrible and it was my fault for not being there to comfort them for a single fucking day. I love them but I legit can't do this, I'm not going to be able to be there for them as much as they need. I've already done so much, skipped school and missed out on hanging with friends becuz they were struggling, or even just outta paranoia that something bad would happen. Hell I can't even take a bath without worrying any more becuz ofc some shit happened while I was having a bath and now I'm scared to leave them for that long without being able to check on them

I wake up I check on them, I get ready and I'm always checking thru their messages that I missed to see what they say and they almost always say something bad, I go to school and I think about them and then at break I check on them and then I do the same at lunch, once I get outta school I check on them and look at the messages I've missed. They consume every single one of my thoughts

And then they lied to me, they fucking hid things. I stood up for them and said that the whole time I've known them, they've only lied once, but turns out they had been lying the whole time I knew them, they had been hiding shit from me and then got angry with themselves when they couldn't recover while actively triggering themself and bitching bout calories, like idk maybe ur not getting better becuz ur on about trying to drop to 200 becuz u used to be able to and apparently 500 is too much for u now, so sorry the amount I eat daily is for fat ppl, and maybe ur not getting better becuz ur counting the cals of individual mushrooms. If u wanted to get better then why are u doing this, and why are u hiding it from me, why didn't u tell me, why did u say u were fine when u were thinking about killing urself and why did u say ur sh wasn't tht bad when it was, when it kept bleeding, when it was infected. And u still didn't go to a doctor for u infected cuts. And why did u say that about me? I can't look at myself anymore, I feel like my body triggers ppl but u triggered me and now I wanna starve more than ever, if u hide things and say horrible shit on secret accounts I can do the same, and I'm gonna fucking starve myself more than ever, I'm gonna go days without eating, will my body trigger u then? U won't fucking know becuz u don't have this app

They won't go to the doctor for their head injuries either, they should've months ago but always found a reason not to and now the wounds healed and they've probably got fucking brain damage, the doctors won't find shit and they'll just keep getting hurt and losing brain cells each time.

Its like they don't wanna get better with how little they listen to my advice, I'm trying to help meanwhile they're acting like what is clearly sh is fine and that they're fine.

Be fucking honest for once

If this relationship fails is becuz I lost trust after the months of lying. I've already thought about ending it multiple times becuz ik I shouldn't have to feel responsible for all this, and that they would be dead without me, but I feel bad leaving them and I still love them

It hurts me sm but I do love them a lot

And idk if I could ever leave, even if this doesn't stop, even if they keep doing this and making me panic and feel insane, even if ik they're not worth it and that I could so easily trigger them over just calling out their bullshit

I think I might start threatening to leave them, otherwise they won't listen and they won't get better

If I hurt them they'll let me becuz their standards are so low anyway

Ik I'm not perfect but I sure as hell wasn't a liar until this point, I was actually trying but now I don't feel like trying becuz I don't feel like they actually respect me, I feel like they like the fact I help them and that's it, ik they'd settle for less then me but that's becuz they've been so abused they don't know how else to be treated, I really don't need to go the extra mile to make them like me when they'd like me even if I hurt them

Ik I'm not perfect but they've pushed me too far and I can't keep doing this

I hope they somehow see this, I hope they learn how it feels, how I feel. Idk how they would find this but they better and I hope it hurts them and ik I'm shitty for wanting that and ik I'll regret this eventually, ik I will

Ik they'll cry and hurt them self and maybe attempt suicide but rn I can't care

I want them to know how it feels

#vent shit #ed vent #sh vent #personal vent #vent post #tw abuse #toxic relationship #kms #i want to ⭐️ve #i wanna lose weight #self h@rm

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highpriestess-stuff · 1 year

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So my day started out well i started with self love affirmations which ive been doing for the past 2 days starting off with a spiritual bath and i must admit it has mad quite a difference im excited to see how this will help me i didnt realise how much i truly needed self love i honestly thought i was such a confident person but im starting to realize how harsh iand negative i can be and im starting to see exactly why all these bitches are jealous of me especially the ones that i work with ive never really had a hard time with making friends but ever since me & T broke but damn did it do a number on me.. Getting cheated the first time was just traumatic & left me with anxiety but having such a strong support system and going to the gym almost like everday and letting it out really helped but this break up just left me completely distraught and just made me not want to live life anymore and isolate myself & i didnt realize how it was affecting all my relationships with my friends my family and co workers like damn this narcissistic gas lighting bitch sucked my fucking soul like end all be all and not a single person there to pick up my pieces my like damn had to get myself out of this shit and i feel powerful as fuck never will i let anyone tear me down like that again LESSON LEARNT: Never settle for less. Took 2 years of my life to realize that but hey it coulda been worse.. still trying to see the positivity in this lol coulda gotten married to this bitch ass but thank god he really had to take me off this path this person refused to understand me & the lesson i learnt was that im not for everybody i am simply a Diving Feminine and we aint for everybody if people dont get u then dont waste your time arguing or explaining yourself cause the right people to get you like how did i become so lost and desperate? i just really wanted him to see me for me i just really wanted to make my family happy .. & he wanted to make his the only difference was im not what his family wanted and u know what thats their loss because as soon as i came out i was told i was going to be a motherfuckin champion it truly is his loss lol he fucked up big time and his family is a peice of shit if they really loved him they would want him to be happy but i guess whats what he deserves OH WELL now i see why they dont want the best for him he deserves exactly that shit even the lord dont want the best for him but me i am truly blessed and protected so thank you Jesus!

Going thru that experience really left me feeling emptier then even it felt like people could also see right thru me it left my fuckin boundaries all over the place i allowed people to step all over me cause i constantly thought i was the problem but now im starting to see i was never the problem its this cruel ass world no matter how nice u are to people or how much u just want to help them because u truly see what the can become and u see their potential it doesnt mean that their going to follow that exact path that u want for them it means giving up control letting people have their own experiences and im just trying to be comfortable with that like hey you wanna go fuck up your life go ahead like who am i to control u not like i got super powers cause if i did bruh. People are wylin & then godforbid i wanna do something for myself then they got a problem like what? are yall on. For example Victoria shes so far up my ass but yet cant even be there for me when i need her like bitch step aside and all day at work today she was so sad like what are u sad for... what happend to that advice that u give everytime "Dont Care" like lets see u do that now you dumbass u look fuckin stupid i have completely lost my respect for her like she looks for pathetic how dare she tell me not to care when i share my feelings with her like hows that going for you? keep ur bitch ass advice to yourself the only reason i ever listened to her was cause i actually respected her i thought she was someone i wanted to be like fuck no! i am so much better then her im better then any of these people how dare they show my any fuckin attitude ever like put some motherfuckin respect on my name or get the fuck out of my face and my energy aura cause i aint for everybody you wanna be around me? show some fuckin respect or get the fuck out because i value myself and my opinions and i can find people who do do i dont need you bitch ass people clearly YOU NEED ME like these people need to realise they need me at the end of the day so show respect or get the fuck out. Even will came in with some wack ass attitude but the second i refused to acknowledge him this nigga really started sucking my dick like are you for real why do i need to be rude like is that what turns you people on like is this why im working in this type of environment to learn that i just need to stay away from people who dont respect my energy why because you people cant do the work and become great like me??? ive done the work ive done the time ive earned to be where the fuck i am and if maybe yall put in the work you guys would be on my level but u aint thats why you bitches are so fuckin miserable and just focused on me unfortunatly thats what comes with the fame and i aint leveling down for no fucking body i came a long fuckin way and i deserve this shit put my crown on again & im knock it off * & this bitch shan like i thought she was the nicest girl ever bitch HAD the audacity to show me attitude like girl do u know who ur dealing with ur 20 nothing its actually cute and laughable because she looks like that character from ice age she thinks shes really doing something i cant with these hoes thinking they affect like.. like bruh this is my partime job lol this is your lifetimes career ofcourse u going to be mad lol stay mad cause what im winning? so u think showing me attitude gonna do something um no it just shows me that ur a terrible person ur disgusting and fuckin ugly i was just being nice and now that youve shown ur true colors i no longer need to loook go crawl back in ur dark cave u hoeeeeeeeeeee.. anyways ill be back for more updates byeeee

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stopfunkinwmyheart · 1 year

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so beyond like the normal bullshit I deal with with dirty ass lying women. my own sister is a fat ass dope fiend. she is lazy as fuck, so stupid, so psychotic. just listens to her kid cry. leaves him on the bed and goes into the bathroom with the door shut to do her makeup for literally an hour at a time. she will be sitting next to him just listening to him scream while she scrolls facebook. this bitch will literally just do anything to annoy me. steals shit out of my room just for the chaos. does retarded shit just so I’ll “get mad”, as if it proves that I’m the psycho that she’s playing games with me. this is really the logic of you stupid ass bitches. you all really got me bro, I’m the one who is retarded. meanwhile she’s spoiled as fuck and anything my family doesn’t give her she just goes out and sucks dick for. she has this dude who has been good as shit to her since she was pregnant. I literally thought dude was her baby daddy. she drives him nuts just for fun and he’s always good to her until he’s had enough and leaves. she hides his phone and just does retarded shit. argues about literally anything. there is literally no helping her. you offer advice when she does dumb shit and if you don’t get ignored then she’s screaming. literally just ignores me as much as possible to try and get a rise out of me. u got me, so salty that a retarded fiend won’t say thank you or answer basic questions with human decency. she fuckin got me. and like at the end of the day the only thing I can assume is either my family is hating that I’m not smoking crack or doing dope, or I’m designated babysitter. like it really makes no fucking sense to me at all. I’ve been asking for normal ass help that literally every single person in my whole family has gotten, for 10+ years. I’m the fucking retard because I’m not smoking crack. like that’s deadass how they treat me. my mom is a bipolar crackhead and if I ask literally anything at all, like “do u know when x..” “did u talk to x...” “RERERERE THE DISHES” meanwhile our tub has been clogged for like 2 fucking weeks. you need to pull our door extra hard to open and slam it to close it. the toilet overflows every few days. I would bet my life right now that my sister clogged the tub and broke the door. she also broke a 44~ inch tv that my mom bought just months earlier. just for the chaos, because she’s a girlfiend. literally for the first year or more that we lived here I did do dishes and was the only one taking the trash out. after a while why the fuck am I going to keep doing what you ask of me when you don’t do one thing that I ask of you. my mom will work all day for like 7 dollars an hour at a place that she’s close to the dope set, then come home like 4 hours after she gets off. when she gets home the maintenance guys are gone already, tough luck, guess we’re beat on anything getting done around here. I better sprinkle comet all over, wipe the counter, and sweep the floor. then I’ll bitch like nobody is doing anything. fuck the tub, the toilet, the door. I swear to god her logic is like “look im doin shit ur not” “forget that I smoke the rent money and you can’t take a shower without using a bucket to drain the tub” “forget that I’m sleeping, out of my mind high, or not here 24/7, look at me sprinkle this comet”

like yeah. after literally over 10 years of me doing everything for all the fiends I’m not doing anything until I get some help. if that somehow turned me into the crackhead then so be it. I’ve literally tried breaking it down too. like listen. why the fuck am I going to keep mopping the floor every day if it gets us nowhere. we need our priorities in order. I can help you a lot more if I had a license. “u did the dishes 15 times”

#just to be clear I have literally been asking for a ride to the dmv since I was 17 #I'm not asking for a used car like literally everyone else got #or the money that all the fiends siphoned #just drop me off

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havoc-bloom · 2 years

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Hiiii I hope im not bothering you but i saw that request r open nd i was wondering if i could get a Madness Combat match up XPP

My pronouns r he/him(transmasc mlm). I’m pretty short nd it really doesn't help that I slouch alot..I have piercings (septum and ears) nd i luvv them nd i want more i think piercings are cool. I have awful resting bitch face but im nice guys i swear🤓

I think I'm an overall friendly person. I love my friends a whole lot and i love doing stuff for my friends too... I love making people laugh even though my humor is really really stupid(i do think im the funniest person ever tho LOLOLOL). Also kind of have anger issues erm🤓.. 'm pretty hardheaded and stubborn. I act out before I think ALOTT… I’m pretty dumb, things fly over my head alot nd I don’t really understand sarcasm alot of the time. I am very touchy, If they are comfortable I always have a hand on my friend or im either playfully smacking them . I'm not very good at handling my own emotions at all i let them get the best of me alot but I think I'm good at giving advice to help other people with theirs.

My biggest hobby is art I love drawing stuff for my friends alot, Nd i have a big passion for cooking. I’m kind of lazy but i can fight nd kick ass I used to take karate classes so I think im pretty good at fighting heehee💪🧐 also becos of karate i have cool weapons like a bo staff, sai,nd moar 🤤 I love things like fire, music blah blah blah, i especially love cats i love them so much they make tme so happy ☹️☹️☹️ all cats r my little baby fr.. all of them id kill for a cat tbh

Okay I hope thats enough >_> thank u verryyy muchh!!!!!!!! Have a good day/nighttt!!!!!!!!!!!

Hello! I haven't been online recently due to school stuff, but I just got out for the summer! Sorry I only just got to your request :')

Anywho, your pairing is...

Deimos!

Deimos finds you absolutely hilarious. Like, can't-breathe-oh-god-this-hurts type laughter. He was intimidated by your resting-bitch-face at first, but the moment you started joking with him, he knew you were good. He loves joking around as well!

He finds your piercings really cool! He also has a piercing on his tongue :)

Yeah ur both dumb as hell together it's fantastic

PLEasE MAKE HIM SOME ART, he thinks people who do art are so cool and he wishes he could do something like that lol.

He LOVES food, especially when he gets to help make it, so try making something like muffins or cookies with him! He'd love it!

Cat people <3

His main hobby is making music, please listen to some of his stuff it's actually rlly good :D

Enjoy being paired w/ Deimos friend :]

#deimos #madness combat #madcom #madness combat deimos #match-ups

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transdeify · 6 years

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Honesty I feel you, I haven’t gone on a date in YEarS

anon you are so valid bro

#in my case its like ever adshdbd #google search: how do you follow ur own relationship advice #20gayteen better start delivering on its promise smh #bc if this goes on any longer ima have to start a lonely hearts club #everyones allowed to join and we bitch abt how couples suck while eating heartshaped candy #we listen to marina and the diamonds and asking alexandria and binge watch barbie movies #its gonna be great #anon #ask away tag

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wooobuddyletsgetnasty · 3 years

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cliche prompts w/ smut 🤠

3. fake to real dating (if u show up to another family function without a fine piece on ur arm u are sure ur grandma will die of a broken heart. who is better to be ur fake lover? ur best friend’s hot sibling. perfect.)

*say it with me- big cock kank 😗*

it was that time of year again. the time that made your stomach churn, the time that made your intestines twist uncomfortably- your family reunion. it was coming up faster than you expected, and your entire being began to dread the very thought of spending two whole days surrounded by your family.

if you had to listen to your aunties talk about how your eggs would begin to dry up if you didn’t find someone to fertilize them- your brain was going to fucking implode. those old hussies were all working on their third husbands anyways. if you thought about it long enough- you were positive at least one of them had killed their first husband, with that being said, you and your shriveled eggs wouldn’t be taking any advice from them.

oh, and you couldn’t forget your sweet grandmother, who questioned exactly when you were going to give her great-grandchildren. she’d bat her grey eyelashes in an attempt to ease your nerves, only to hit you when you least expect, “you aren’t getting any younger, you know.” you could hear her already.

and then their was your mother. a she-devil in her own right, one that was damn determined to set you up with any man that looked twice in your direction, “well look at him! he could give you strong children.. probably has loins like a stallion..” you’d shudder, and continue on your way- loins like a stallion be damned.

if you were honest, you were comfortable where you were now, and children were the last thing on your mind. you were happy enough on your own, focused on you, and your career. you considered finding a way out, using an excuse like work... or a broken leg... but ultimately decided that you could deal with a little harassment if it meant you didn’t have to face the wrath of your mother. even then, the dread in your chest was urging you to make some risky choices- which is exactly how you found yourself where you were now- asking for advice from your best friend.

she had a plan, and in your foggy, anxiety filled brain- it was genius. a fake date! you would actually kiss her if she wasn’t married, but the idea brought on another issue- who would you ask? she, of course, ever the shifty bitch, had someone in mind- one of her brothers, preferably the one you’d been lusting after for years.

Temari had been your best friend for as long as you could remember, even if you were closer to the age of her youngest brother, Gaara. you could only imagine the reaction your family would have if you showed up with the fucking kazekage on your arm, but you weren’t as close to him as you were with Temari’s other brother, Kankuro. now he, he was more your type. if you recalled correctly, he always had been.

he teased you from time to time, and you couldn’t help the rush of embarrassment each time he brought it up. yes, you had an extra large crush on him as a child, one that started with the thought of holding his hand, and kissing his cheek, and then morphed into you waking up from a dream drenched between the thighs, and grinding against your pillow until you came with his name on your tongue. try as you might- he would never let you forget. you would also like to think that you had grown out of your pathetic little crush, but if you caught him on a good day- he still made your stomach tingle in a way that was just downright fucking sinful.

it wasn’t fair that he was allowed to wander around looking like that.

————

it took longer than you had thought it would to convince him, including lots of bribing and pleading. you were going to be doing his laundry for a long time for this, and at this point— just hoping it would work.

you needed a game plan, a stupid relationship story, but you had both decided that the way you had actually met was just fine- meaning your cover up was him being your best friend’s brother, and somewhere along the line you fell in love. easy to believe- you’d probably spent more time with the three of them than with your actual family.

Kankuro also knew your family, and he was accustomed to them, and the way they would react. so he was more than prepared to be hanging off your arm in a few days. your trophy husband, that’s what he had called himself. you told him you thought he was moving too fast- you’d only just begun dating.

————

the day had finally come, and fuck you hated it here. settling down after the longish walk to your childhood home- your old bed was already calling your name- but you weren’t done yet. your aunts were due to arrive at anytime, and the very thought of them made you sick.

you were jerked out of your thoughts by a warm hand on your lower back, and your head tilted to meet Kankuro’s gaze, he grinned, looking slightly uneasy, “you okay?” you sucked in a deep breath, holding it there, and willing your nerves to vanish, “uh.. is no an acceptable answer?” that pulled a real smile from him, the paint around his mouth shifting with it, “it definitely is.”

you heard the door click below, before loud chatter began to erupt. you eased yourself next to Kankuro, your arm linking with his, hand gripping at his bicep, “show time.” you walked slowly down the stairs, practicing your fake smile. Kankuro’s free hand moving to cover yours, before squeezing, making the smile you were faking suddenly very real.

you felt at ease beside him, which was strange, as he had always been nothing but a jackass. it made your chest tighten with anxiety, and you pulled away from him as quickly as you could. not fast enough apparently, as his hand caught yours, and he pulled you in tightly, arm wrapping around your shoulders in a backwards hug, something like a real boyfriend might have. it made your stomach drop to your feet.

maybe this wasn’t as good of an idea as you thought.

————

you took back what you said earlier- this was an amazing fucking idea. your family loved Kankuro, and you were more than willing to take the backseat at let him brag about his endeavors. after all, if they were paying attention to him, you could come away from this unscathed.

it was going all well and dandy, until your grandmother started in, however this time, all her questions were pointed at Kankuro. it started with a flutter of her lashes, and then a change in her smile, “children,” she started, almost like an absent minded thought, “they’re great, huh?” you choked on the bite of food in your mouth, Kankuro’s hand moving to rub at your back, before he began nodding along slowly. her gaze flickered between the two of you, before continuing with, “when are you planning on having some?”

you caught your breath, looking over at him, waiting for whatever bullshit answer he would come up with, bringing your glass to your mouth in an attempt to calm your nerves. you watched his grin turn to mischievous, “soon... we try for one all the time.” you choked on your drink. that bastard.

even your grandmother seemed shocked at his reveal- not only was he your boyfriend, but he was trying to knock you up. fantastic. you gave her a polite smile, before turning the conversation to your aunt’s work. now this, this was a fucking nightmare.

————

it was late now, and everyone had long retired to bed, other than you of course. you had a bone to pick with your boyfriend. you crowded him the moment he stepped out of the bathroom, stopping for only a moment to ogle at his bare face and unkempt hair, before deciding to let into him, “are you joking?” he huffed in response, before continuing to towel dry his hair, “relax, would you? it’s not like I’m actually railing you.”

your eyes widened, but you didn’t respond to him. that was unusual, you always had a quip back at him, and he paused in the door frame of the room you’d be sharing for the night, turning his gaze back to your face- your bright red face. oh.. oh.. now that, that was interesting.

“what’s wrong, princess?” you refused to meet his eyes, pushing past his broad frame to settle on the bed- and hopefully die in your sleep from embarrassment. he paused, watching you carefully before huffing a sigh, “ ‘as just teasing you.” you scowled, “ ‘snot funny.” he settled in next to you, and you turned, putting your back to him— it didn’t help the feeling of his dark eyes burning a hole through you.

you could have died, honestly and truly, when he spoke again, but this time in barely a whisper, “you ever think about it?” your body twisted, turning to face him again, only to find your face inches away from his, close enough to share his warm breath, “think about what? us dating? or you railing me?” this time, it was his face that turned red, “both?” you sucked in a deep breath, taking in the his features- the shape of his eyes, the curve of his nose, the outline of his lips, “yes.”

your breathing was more shallow now, Kankuro’s mirroring your own, this time with him observing you- the curve of your jaw, the shade of your eyes in the dark light, the bob of your throat with each heavy swallow, the swell of your breasts, “me too.” you kissed him before he could finish the words, your hands tangling tightly in his hair, fingers rubbing over his scalp— and he let you, if anything, he wanted you to.

you moved to straddle his hips, panty-clad pussy dragging easily over the heat of his cock. he was big, oh fuck— you keened against his mouth, louder when his hands gripped at your hips, and tugged you forward against him— until your clit rubbed deliciously over the fabric of his boxers, the friction rough enough your spine arched at the feeling. the dizziness from him kissing you breathless only adding to the pleasure of finally feeling him after all these years.

you were impatient with undressing yourself, you would have been embarrassed if it wasn’t for the urgency Kankuro displayed as well. the crown of his cock was pressing against you in no time, and you wondered if you were moving too fast, but he definitely didn’t seem to mind. his thumbs continued to rub tight circles on the meat of your hips as you sunk down on his cock— whines of his name pulling from your chest with each inch— he was going to split you in fucking half. you couldn’t find any part of yourself that cared when the first rock of your pelvis against his stung more than it should have.

he urged you to slow down, be easy, he wasn’t going anywhere. but you were insatiable, and too drunk off his cock to care, your glazed eyes meeting his as you moved to press another kiss to his mouth. you didn’t care if it hurt- you could take it. you were taking it.

maybe your eggs wouldn’t dry up after all.

#naruto x reader #naruto #naruto imagines #smut smut smut #kankuro x reader #kankuro #kankuro smut #kankuro imagines #kekekkeee #naruto smut

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taylorkellyreporting · 2 years

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i hope no one minds if i liveblog this bitch: scream 5

i wish i could say i’m going into this completely blind but unfortunately i got some major parts of the movie spoiled :/ still excited to watch it tho

opening to a phone ringing i feel sick

God i’m already holding my breath

“ANSWER THE PHONE BITCH” 😭😭

“it is gale weathers, you motherfucker!” lmfaoo

jenna ortega acted her ass off oh wow

so…richie isn’t sam’s dad. alright.

not hobbs and shaw 😭😭

uglier michael myers dkfkfkdks

he’s just collateral damage i bet

i have so many questions. first one being: what the fuck?

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE’S BILLY’S KID WHAY

the picture of dewey and gale oh i cant breathe

“give me one good reason to talk to you!” “i’m billy loomis’ daughter!” “that’s a terrible reason to talk to you” i love dewey so much 😭

gale talking about her bangs fjgjgjdks

i wonder why gale and dewey got a divorce ☹️

SIDNEY’S A MOM IM GONNA CRY

SHE HAS TWINS OH 🥺

“i’m sidney fucking prescott, of course i have a gun” ugh i love her

this is their last conversation, isn’t it? :(

“hope you’re doing well 🙂” FKGJGKDKD

“my brother would be so proud!” lmao he so would

“maybe you’re the killer cause that cut deep” 😭

“i’m starting to regret coming here” fr

“you’re safe”

“i’m gale…riley. weathers! i’m gale weathers!” ☹️

God gale and dewey still love each other so much

“you know we have to live through this to help her, right?” pls

oh God i can’t do this i’m not ready for dewey’s death i’m not strong enough

“who gives a fuck?!” “i do.” GOD

GOD HIS SMILE WHEN HE LOOKED AT HIS AND GALE’S PICTURE IM GONNA BE SICK

can’t even appreciate gale and sidney hugging bc of the fucking circumstances

they made it so obvious that richie is in on it bc why wouldn’t ghostface kill him too?

i don’t like amber and i sure as shit don’t trust her

mason gooding fine as hell

“don’t take this the wrong way” 😭

chad? chad? his name is chad? are you kidding me?

well chad is deffo dying next

“well he’s dead.” i love mindy 😭

“turn around!” maybe listen to ur own advice, mindy

“there are always two killers!” and ur one of them

“i’m bored.” I LOVE HER

“you killed my best friend!” i hate it here

“enjoy that torch” 😭😭😭

i’m so sad about dewey ☹️ like i get why it had to happen but he was one of my favorites

my God this was so good i’m shocked lmao

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