"I suppose I would be a good Christian, but the church did everything to turn me into a complete atheist." -- Friedrich Schiller

they're pinning my wings to a cork board tomorrow,

and i will stretch them out to be pierced.

i will offer no struggle or complaint,

i will lie there with obedience and docility

and let them make a show of how i chose to let them pin my wings.

look at her, they will point and say to my fellow winged creatures,

look at how she let us pin her wings!

she is so much happier like this.

flying is an abomination. 

and i will hang there,

suspended,

until i slip off of the nails eventually

and the holes heal.

then i will realise,

when my mother is taking me back to them to pin me down again, that 

i do want to fly.

i will no longer let them pin my wings to a cork board.

inspired by x via @papayajuan2019

RAMADAN IS ONCE AGAIN HERE THIS YEAR EXMUSLIMS !

Just reposting some old tips again on my blog!

If you’re secretly eating, be wary of wrappers, bags, empty water bottles, etc. Have a designated place to put them if you can. After iftar, quickly dispose ! Time is important with this one, as it collects your stash is most likely to get noticed. I typically hide them in a corner in my closet, under some clothes I don’t really wear.

If you’re a girl, feel free extend the days of your period if you can. Be cautious when using this since you can only do this once during Ramadan. Sorry boys 😭

Don’t be afraid to look kinda dusty. You’re “not eating” for most of the day so a typical person might look a bit busted and tired.

There’s extra eyes on you since more Muslims are expected to be more religious. If you’re like many of us closeted Muslims, you got to keep up a facade. Make sure this mask stays up to avoid suspicion!

Music! Listen to it in secret and don’t get caught with earbuds in!

Believe in yourself ! You are strong and can get through this.

Quotes That Will Hit Formerly Religious People Where It Hurts: Pt. 5

When they told me god was always watching I said, Who wants to worship a diary thief? I didn't dare say who wants to worship anyone

who would see everything and just sit there doing nothing while the devil flossed his teeth with the bow of my prettiest violin?

Andrea Gibson, Good Light

I should pursue a relationship with God but why doesn't he show effort? If he does, it's just breadcrumps. I was looking for the slightest bit of love.

i’ve found myself getting weirdly internally defensive recently over (atheists i guess?) people making fun of creationists as being these like, stupid crazy people. on the one hand, i get it, it looks and is pretty crazy from the outside and it’s not true so how could they believe this? but on the other hand i lived that and i believed that once. i was that kid that sat through science class internally saying that i would learn this but it’s not true. i understand how this stuff is taught to you as not just a silly little “the earth was created in 7 days and is only 6,000 years old! isn’t that neat?” but in reality is “if you don’t believe in creationism as we teach it, and fully disregard evolution, then you’re going to hell and can never be truly saved because if you don’t believe this god doesn’t claim you as his own.” it’s terrifying. it was terrifying. it feels like now, when i see people making fun of them, especially people who remind me of myself, it feels like they’re attacking me. i don’t believe in it now and i love learning about science and evolution and things like that but it feels like they’re attacking my younger self. they weren’t stupid. they didn’t know any better. they /couldn’t/ know any better. i guess all i’m saying here is i wish people were a little less, antagonistic? maybe? i don’t think that’s the word i’m looking for but i don’t know. it’s just that making fun of the religious kid can usually make it a lot harder to ever leave religion. they teach you that everyone outside your group is mean and scary and evil so when they then laugh and tell you how stupid you are for believing what you “believe”, it just reinforces that worldly view. i get it though. it’s silly

Repost: Should I stay or should I go?

Should I stay or should I go? Exploring a journal prompt from chapter 2 of “Changing Paths” Excellent post from Jarred reflecting on one of the journal prompts from Changing Paths. Hello dear readers! It’s Friday morning so that means once again exploring a journal prompt from the wonderful book, Changing Paths… Should I stay or should I go? Exploring a journal prompt from chapter 2 of…

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Should I stay or should I go? Exploring a journal prompt from chapter 2 of "Changing Paths"

[Content Warning: Mentions of suicidal ideation, religion trauma,] Hello dear readers! It’s Friday morning so that means once again exploring a journal prompt from the wonderful book, Changing Paths by non-binary witch Yvonne Aburrow. This week’s prompt comes from chapter two, which is titled “Leaving Your Religion.”1 Today’s chosen prompt reads as follows: Imagine yourself staying in your…

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https://quranx.com/hadith/Bukhari/DarusSalam/Hadith-6922/

Narrated `Ikrima:

Some Zanadiqa (atheists) were brought to `Ali and he burnt them. The news of this event, reached Ibn `Abbas who said, "If I had been in his place, I would not have burnt them, as Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) forbade it, saying, 'Do not punish anybody with Allah's punishment (fire).' I would have killed them according to the statement of Allah's Messenger (ﷺ), 'Whoever changed his Islamic religion, then kill him.'"

https://quranx.com/Hadith/AbuDawud/DarusSalam/Hadith-2670

Narrated Samurah ibn Jundub:

The Prophet (ﷺ) said: Kill the old men who are polytheists, but spare their children.

https://quranx.com/4.89

They wish you would disbelieve as they disbelieved so you would be alike. So do not take from among them allies until they emigrate for the cause of Allah. But if they turn away, then seize them and kill them wherever you find them and take not from among them any ally or helper.

December is Ex-Muslim Awareness Month.

the terrifying thing about trying to leave catholicism behind after being born into is that you can't. you cannot be unbaptised, you cannot wash the blood you were bathed in off of your body, you cannot divorce your body from the human sacrifice it has already eaten.

it feels like ripping yourself apart.

Daily reminder to my exmuslims that feeling occasional doubt about leaving Islam is completely valid! Most of us has grew up with being a Muslim for a long time, it’s part of your journey when it comes to distancing yourself from religion. Love to you all! :)

Are your glasses a result of unconfessed sin, Deborah? Then neither is my mood disorder ☕