I'm gonna delete this later but I will say I think a very very important skill to have, specifically for autistic people with special interests/hyperfixations in content creator fandoms is the ability to disengage when necessary for your own health. and it is absolutely a skill, like you can't just stop caring about something and be able to distance yourself whenever something triggering happens without practice. I'm saying this from experience.

i have hyperfixated on content creator's media since I was eleven years old. I was in the trenches over Markiplier when he had controversies every few months, I had would literally have nightmares over the idea of him being a bad person. Which isn't healthy!

Not even talking about parasocialisms or whatever because that's been talked to death, but I mean for me! For 11, 13, 17, 20 year old me that is not healthy! It is exhausting being stressed out and worried that someone who makes stuff I like is a bad person, especially when you engage with the fandom on twitter. It is fucking vital to unplug in these situations, and to learn how to. And it's not an easy skill to learn it has taken me since I was a literal child to know to develop that skill. But it is important.

And it's not just suddenly not caring about something, but it's disengaging in the moment if necessary, and to be honest I think for a lot of people it is necessary.

Listen, you don't have to explain yourself, you don't have to say goodbye or give a reason why you'll be staying, you don't have to make a statement on your blog or answer anon asks. you owe everyone literally nothing when it comes to online fandom. It is a hobby and sometimes you have to be okay and stepping back when necessary. Undownload twitter for the next three weeks. Block every tag under the sun that'll upset you.

This is rambling but the last thing I'll say is you are a whole complete person without your special interest, and if an interest disappoints you or hurts you that is not then inherently a reflection of you. you are a full complete complex person without it, and you don't have to loose it completely even if right now it might be important for you to step back and regulate yourself. and it is hard and it can be incredibly upsetting and you are valid and real for feeling whatever you're feeling. it's okay.

anyway im going to go read national treasure yaoi now✌️ xoxo gossip girl

YES! JOIN ME IN THE DELCIOUS DUNGEONS!

jungkook + mic stands for @cosmicdreamgrl cr. 0613data, namuspromised

idk how to live so im going to talk to myself out loud until i do

beaming everyone on the dashh with good brain day vibes!!! i hope that you all can remember to extend self-compassion to yourself whenever you're feeling down about something 💙

Sorry about the theater of emotions going on my face from across the room. I'm trying to resolve an argument that I made up between two fictional characters.

call me crazy but i don't think you need to be a martyr to be educated

hi egg!!!! ive seen the tag a couple times now and im just so curious who is lady terror 👀 an oc? a ship personified? can i peer into your mind for a second (the answer here can also be Who's to say or just NO)

YES! Lady Terror (real name: Genevieve Sinclair) is my sortof self-insert (though she’s gained a bit more of a life of her own now) OC for the Terror. She and Francis as the most disenfranchised from british empirical thought and good society are falling horrifically in love with each other over the course of the expedition in spite of their respective past romantic rejections and dejections and it being the literal Worst Time To Do That. And I tag them when I am… reminded (I’m certain some think I do this too often… but it’s my house). I’m painfully (and soul crushingly at times) trying to get the canon novel for them written (though I have an excerpt of the first chapter in my masterlist in my pinned, should that be of interest), which intends to have the most insane gothic jane austen vibes one could hope for, and I have like 20 au’s for them including a particular western au that is gaining increasing real estate in my brain recently. Loads of content in the “egg’s oc’s” tag if you wanna take a peek (I say mostly bc I’m exclusively on mobile atm bc my computer is in the shop and linking over isn’t very easy😭) and I have some mini fics for them in my masterlist as well!

sometimes i'm full of thoughts and feelings that are harsh and negative and i have to mentally pick myself by the scruff of the neck like a naughty kitten and say "no. stop it!"

ok time to try to blame someone else instead of me

kids these days don’t know shit about how to act at concerts (group of 17/18yos managed to lose one of the 17yos in the festival crowd and not realize it until an hour and a half later at the preplanned rendevous time, despite having been explicitly instructed to stay in groups of 3 or more at all times)

I miss you all and I wanna come back, but the minute I’m back here I sigh and close the app I just can’t 😭 but I hope you all know :

something something the inherent horror in your body being treated as an instrument

:(

Very bad grade in therapy today

modern clem/gus is like "can a fashion diy instagram girl and a reddit r/nosleep boy find love" and the answer is yes

when the audhd is fun until you become "i really really really have to give my input/side/idea and i dont give a fuck who's talking or what everyone was initially talking about" and before this site's illiteracy kicks in i'm certain we're all guilty of this to some extent