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he’s worldwide handsome and he knows it
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Professor’s Pet
A/N: This is pure smut pwp. Couldn’t help myself. I know a few peole thirtsy for Professor Namjoon. So here ya go my lovelies!
characters; Professor!Namjoon x TeachersAide!Reader
Warnings: pure unadluterated smut, exhibitionism, voyeurism
Word Count: 4403
You entered the lecture hall just like all the other students. Letting the others pour in through the double doors, you waited until all seats were taken. You meandered through the maze of sleepy-eyed students, smiling as you recall your first year at Uni. You take your seat at the lone desk to the right of the lecture stage. Smoothing your skirt down, you slide into your seat and cross your legs. The doors to the back of the hall swing open, and all eyes turn to the sound. A collective sigh echoes off the walls as the young girls in the class take in the visage before them.
“Good morning class. Welcome to History of Sexuality 101. I am your professor Kim Namjoon.”
It had not been that long since you had seen him last. He took his annual vacation the last two weeks of summer break. And you had taken off for the States the month before that. What stood before you was a changed man. Usually his hair was clean cut, naturally dark brown, and skin a soft honey tone. But this, this man was gorgeous. His hair had gown out, now styled in a tousled mess. His skin was tanned to a deep caramelized honey and he was wearing wire rimmed glasses. You swallowed hard, hoping he wouldn’t notice you staring.
He made his way to the front of the room, coming to stand behind the podium. He eyes roamed the class,finally settling on you.
“Class I would like to introduce you to my Teacher’s Aide Y/N Y/L/N. She has been helping me teach for the past two years.”
There was a cacophony of hellos and sighs. You knew how the girls felt, you remembered how your heart raced the first time you saw him. Those eyes that could read your inner most thoughts. That smilet hat could melt the snow of a thousand winters’ snow. Those lips that could form words that sounded like a song as he spoke.
“Morning Class.” You stood slightly, bowing in greeting to the students first, and then to Professor Kim. “Morning Professor.”
The initial lecture went on without a hitch, and the sudden intrusion of the bell had you nearly jumping in your seat. Class was dismissed, and you gathered the papers from the long lines of conference tables. You carried them to your desk, shuffling them to make a neat pile. You felt warm breath fan across your bare neck, chills dancing down your spine. You turned around, finding him smiling down at you.
“So, Miss Y/N, ready for another semester?” You grinned cheekily, nodding in response. “Good, good. I must add, you look stunning as usual. The States treated you well, I see.”
“Yes they did. I had a lovely visit with my Auntie and Uncle. How was your trip this year? What exciting adventure did you take this time?”
“I visited Vienna and Norway. You know me, museums and nature.” You laughed, knowing good and well his love of the arts and Mother Nature. You chatted for a few more minutes while the both of you gathered your things. Just as you were about to dismiss yourself, you felt his hand encircle your wrist, turning you to face him. His eyes searched yours, lips trying to form words that never came.
“I will see you later? How about we meet up after your last class and go over the syllabus.” He nodded , his head lowering to the ground as his cheeks blushed a faint shade of rose. You placed your hand over his, telling him goodbye. He watched as you faded from sight, mentally kicking himself for not saying the thoughts that were jumbled in his head. He had to tell you, before it was too late. But he was afraid that it would change the dynamic of your close friendship, and that was something he didn’t want to lose. The meeting came and went, and still he was left speechless. He had to figure something out, and quick.
The next week of lectures sailed by smoothly, even with the occasional lame attempt from frat boy trying to hit on you. Namjoon was always quick to save you from their advances, telling them something akin to regulations and failing class. His chivalry had your heart racing,and your mind swirling. But you knew the repercussions of flirting with a professor, and your future hung on this position.
“Y/N, I need your help tomorrow with the lesson I am giving a live demonstration and I will need your assistance if you don’t mind.” He was sitting at his desk, fingers interlaced behind his head as he leaned back in the seat. “I know your going to think me mad, but I need you to dress, umm, seductively?” He was blushing again, and you could feel your own cheeks heating.
“Seductively? Well, okay. Anything in particular?” You began imagining all the skimpysexy clothes you had,but never wore because you were embarrassed. You had curves in all the perfect places, but didn’t think you should be showing them off. Damn self conscious negativity. But this was an opportunity to have people noticing you in the name of education.
“Well, how about that one skirt you have, the dark grey one. Oh, and that halter top you wore at the end of last semester.” He tried hard to hide the fact that he really wanted to see you in that outfit outside of work, but couldn’t bring himself to say anything.
“Okay. I guess I will see you tomorrow. Have a good night Professor.” You hesitate, looking at him with hopeful eyes, wanting his to see what is there without you having to speak it into existence. There is a heavy silence that fills his small office,and the tension is so thick , you can hardly breathe properly. He looked up from his laptop, tilting his head as he studied your features.
“Goodnight. Get home safely.” You left his office, cursing your mind for the images that were popping up. Images of him undressing behind that desk, eyes boring into your soul.
“Fuck” was all you could mutter as the door shut behind you.
The next morning you showered, taking extra time to shave every inch that had unwanted hair. You styled your hair with extra attention to showing of your neck and shoulders. Your make-up was light, accentuating your features and made your eyes pop with vibrant color. You slipped into the long skirt, loving the way it flared out, but still clung to your hips. The white halter top clung to your body, the swell of your breasts peeking just above the neckline. You slid your feet into strappy sandals, then looked yourself over in the mirror. You had to admit, you looked beautiful, and decided that if this didn’t do anything to the professor, nothing would. You gathered your bag and headed out the door. The short walk form your apartment to the campus took about ten minutes. You could feel eyes on you, the leering glances from young and horny college boys. You even garnered a few cat calls, which even though disgusting in nature, brought a faint smile to your lips. You arrived early, entering the lecture hall before everyone else.
Professor Namjoon was putting a long table at center stage, between your desk and the podium. When he heard the doors open he looked up, turning to face the direction of the sound. His eyes widened and mouth fell slightly open as he drank you in. You, in return, had to stop mid-step as you raked your gaze over him. His royal blue oxford was unbuttoned to the middle of his chest, the well defined muscles just barely visible. The sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, the outline of strained muscles etched into his forearms as he leaned against the table’s edge. His long legs stretched out in front of him, the taut strain of his thighs visible beneath his khakis. You felt a flame ignite low in your belly, the heat rising to warm you throughout.
“Good- good morning Y/N. You look… Perfect.” He licked his lips, the sudden parched feeling in his mouth had him begging for a drink of cool water. You lowered your head, your inner goddess standing up and taking over. You made your way to the table, stopping mere inches from him.
“Morning Professor. I hope this is what you were looking for?” You spun on your heel, the skirt billowing out as you took it in your fingers then curtsied. When you finally met his gaze, you couldn’t help but stare back at him. It was in that moment, when there as nothing around you, that you knew you were falling, and the bottom would never come.
Just as he was about to speak, the students began filing in, and you took a few steps back. You had to force your eyes to divert away from his and greet the students with a smile that was probably wider than it should be. He straighten, saying his usual hellos and other mundane greetings. His voice was an octave lower and harsh, something that took you both by surprise.
As the student took their seats, Namjoon made his way to the podium. He gave you a sly look, then addressed the class.
“Today students, we are going to have a visual demonstration on wanton sexuality. We will discuss how to seduce and enrapture your lover. We will talk about foreplay, specifically fallatio and cunnilingus.” There was a collective gasp from the students, and you even joined in. Just what did he mean by visual demonstration? You looked at him from the corner of your eye, and the look on his face had you even more confused. He had a flat affect, no sign of what was going through his mind at that time. You crossed your legs tightly, already feeling the hint of dampness in your silk panties. You shuddered noticeably, hoping the rest of the class didn’t see. Your head snapped up when you heard him say your name.
“Y/N. Could you please join me up here?” You felt all eyes on you as your rose from your desk and joined him in the middle of the stage. “Now, Y/N is going to help me with the demonstration. Pay attention class, there may be a test on this.” He gave a wink, the class going silent as they got their pens and pencils ready for notes. Namjoon took your hand and guided you to stand in front of the table he set up. Placing his hands on either side of your waist, he hoisted you up, seetling you on the side of the table.
“No class, imagine that you have this beautiful woman before you. You want her, and you want her desperately. You want to show her who’s in control. So what do you do?” He scanned the boy and girls, nodding at their various answers. “Those were all good choices. Now lets put one into practice. “Y/N, I want you on your knees.” Something changed in his eyes. They were dark and dangerous, and you felt your legs quiver in anticipation. You quickly obeyed, sliding of the table and onto your knees. He positioned himself in front fo you,his pelvis at eye level.
“Now, babygirl, take the zipper in your teeth and unzip my pants without using your hands.” You looked up at him through your lashes, searching for any sign that he was playing. You leaned forward, using your tongue to place the zipper pull between your teeth, slowly lowering your head as you heard the zipper unlatching. He undid his belt and unbuttoned the single button, leaving his pants now laid open. You could see the black of his boxers, you mouth watering at the sight.
“Now, pull my pants down with your hands, then place your hands on your lap.” You did as you were told, resting your noe trembling hands on your lap as you waited for his next command.
“As you can see class, her hands are slightly shaking. Is it from anticipation, want, fear? This is where communication is vital.” He looked down at you, his voice becoming soft as he spoke to you.
“If you ever want me to stop, just say so. I want you to always feel safe, and know that I would never do anything to hurt you.” You nodded in assent, desire evident in your gaze as you watched him.
“Now, be a good girl and pull my boxers down with your teeth, that’s it, just like that. Using only your tongue, I want you to guide my cock into your mouth.” The second your warm, wet, tongue touched the head of his cock, he let out a breathy sigh. His legs tensed,the muscles stretching tight under his heated flesh. He was heavy on your tongue and you could feel him growing harder in the warm cavern of your mouth. It was mind shattering how his filthy words, mixed with the salty taste of precum, made you hungry for more. In the background, you could hear the scuffling of seats as the students leaned forward. The thought of you on full display, letting someone watch you, had your body buzzing with need. The idea of you pleasuring someone, and having others know it was you doing this to him, and not them, made you feel empowered. His voice brought you back to the present, and you were ready to oblige his next orders.
“Hollow your cheeks, princess. I want to feel the back of your throat. I want to feel it tighten as you swallow around me.” You wondered if you could take in the entirety of his length and girth, but you were damned and determined to make it happen. You felt the prick of tears in your eyes, but you had lost all sense to back off. You wanted, no, you needed, to feel all of him in your mouth.
“Now class, shehow compliant she is. She wants this just as much as you do. She wants to please you, because she knows you will please her in return. Watch carefully as I then fist my fingers in her hair, holding her head still as I begin to thrust my hips and fuck into her hot, wet mouth.” The groan that escaped his lungs filled the large room. You could barely hear the clearing of throats and feminine sighs over the thrumming of your heart in your ears.
“See how well she takes me, my cock fully sheathed until I can feel the back of her throat. At this point- Fuck. At this point, i can already feel my orgasm building, just from watching that pretty little head moving back and forth as I set the pace. But,I’m not ready yet. She deserves some much needed attention too. Right?”
Everyone agreed, their own voices strained and thick. Without warning, he pulled his hips back, slipping out of your mouth with a sloppy wet pop. His fingers untangled themselves from your hair. You watched as he offered his hand to you, wrapping long slender fingers around yours as you took his hand. He helped you up, his eyes running up and down your body, finally settling on your lust blown pupils.
“Alright babygirl, up on the table.” He easily lifted you up, gently setting you back down where you had started. With a gentle push, he had you laying back on the table. He reached under each knee, pulling you towards him. You felt him move your legs as he told the class your next moves.
“Legs apart and spread them wide for me princess. Good, now just close your eyes and don’t open them until I say so.” You shut your eyes tight, every nerve fiber at the ready for a touch, for anything.
“Come closer everyone. I want you to really see what happens when she is worshipped and touched in the most intimate of ways. Watch how she reacts when I do this.” Your entire body shook with need, wanting to feel any part of him touching you. You almost came when you felt his tongue, wide and flat, run up along the seam of your folds which were already dripping and coated in your sweet juices. His hands were hot on your flesh as they held your legs apart, exposing your bare cunt to the class. Feeling you shake, he smiled against you.
“Don’t move baby or else I’m going to have to smack that pretty little ass of yours.” The ‘oohs’ and snickers had your head spinning. “Now class, watch and learn. She’s now laid open and needy, hungry for my lips to latch onto her clit. It’s buzzing and tingling, craving for attention, isn’t princess?” You nodded quickly, unable to make coherent words form in your head or on your lips.
He darts his tongue out, barely flicking the sensitive bundle of nerves. You can’t help the low breathy moan that falls from your lips in a whimper. Your back arches off the table, hands searching for purchase on something, anything, to keep you grounded.
“Did you see that? She how she shows me, without words, thats she wants more? Now lets see how she does when I do this, shall we?” He pullsyourclit between his teeth, nipping at it gingerly. Your hands find the tousled dark locks of his hair, gathering them in your fists as you push his head down further. He laps at your clit, the tip swirling tight hard circles over your nub as your begin to moan louder. He leans his head back, his mouth and chin glistening from your slick juices.
“Hear those sounds? That’s what pleasure sounds like. Those are needy desire filled moans.” You shook the desk with the force of your body shuddering. His voice was deep, almost menacing, as he spoke.
You nearly cum as he dips a finger inside you, slowly dragging it along your walls. When he take a second finger, entering you and scissoring them apart. You mewl and keen without caring who heard. You could feel the sting and stretch as he opens you up, making you ready to welcome him inside of you.
You are bereft of contact, suddenly cold with the absence of his lips on your dripping wet pussy. You turn your head left and right, searching for any indication of where he was. His voice guided your senses until your head was looking in his direction.
“Let’s watch her come undone class. Let’s watch her as she become raw and unbridled. I want to watch her as she looks at me. Let’s learn together, okay. But, I won’t let her cum until you all tell me if you think she’s ready.” He is looking at you, your skirt up around your waist, your panties at your ankles. He situates himself between your legs, the warm, a welcomed intrusion. He puts his fingers in his mouth, tasting your sweetness before hie dips them under the lining of your bralette. He brings the edges down, exposing your breast to the cool air. Your nipples harden as he blows cool air across them, taking one is his hand and twisting it harshly between his fingers while his mouth suckles on the other. You grip his arms, digging your nails into his strong biceps. He frees one breast from his hold as they trail down your sides and to your hips. His fingers dig in, hard enough to know you will have bruises later that day. He drags you across the table until your ass is just on the ledge. You feel his hard cock coming to nestle between your folds, slicking it from base to head.
“Open your eyes babygirl. Look me in the eyes, and don’t look away.” He wraps his hand around his cock, the head a deep purple, as he gives it a few slow languid strokes. His other hand is still buried between your legs, pumping in and out of you, bringing you dangerously close to release. Your eyes open, focusing in on his. His pupil are full blown, dark and dangerous if you didn’t know what he was planning to do to you. But you did know, and that hint of danger had you thriving for more. You had to have him filling you up, claiming you as his, if only for this moment.
“P-please.” it was barely a whisper, but he had heard your words. Something changed when he heard you. It was no longer a carnal need, but something more that made him want to have you. It was the long pent up feelings he had for you that made him want to claim you as his, and his alone.
He placed the head of his cock at your entrance, teasing you until you were a writhing mess. Forgetting about the class, he rolled his hips forward, inching deeper and deeper inside of you. You felt like home, the way hit fit inside you, your velvet wals stretching the closing around his length like you two were made for each other. The surroundings disappeared as he looked down at you. You were beautiful, in the throws of pure unadulterated passion, and he had never seen such raw unhinged beauty as he saw now.
“Fuck, Y/N. Do you even know how purely sexy you look right now? I will never get enough of looking at you, claiming your body as mine.” He could care less if the class was privy to the fact that he wanted you, craved you. He bent down over you, ghosting his lips over yours. When they parted in a sigh, he claimed your mouth in a fevered kiss. You could taste the heady mixture of your juices and him. Tongues danced and sought to claim dominance. You were lost in him. To hell with holding back your feelings, to hell with the risk that could come with wanting to be his.
He set a tortuous rhythm, your back lifting off the table to meet him thrust for thrust. You didn’t care about the hardness of the table as it dug into you ass cheeks, you only cared about how he was filling you and driving you to your apex. The coil tightened in your gut, burning with a need to snap. He reached under one knee, lifting your leg up and over his shoulder as he angled deeper, hitting your sweet spot with every thrust of his hips.
He was faltering in his pace, his own orgasm closing in. He wanted to hold out, wanted to see you come undone beneath him.
“Come on baby, cum for me. Let me watch you was you come undone because of me.” HIs words pushed you over the crest, rising like a phoenix from the ashes, before you were weightless and falling. Flashes of stars, in every color, filled your vision behind closed lids. The moment your walls clenched down around him, he was lost in the feeling. His cock pulsed and twitched, his seed spilling into you hot and thick. He collapsed onto your chest, both of you panting and gasping for precious air. Opening your eyes, you knew it, you knew you loved him, and from the look in his eyes, he felt the same way. He let his forehead fall against yours, hip lips pressing tenderly to yours. As the realization that there was a class full of people watching, you let out a small giggle.
“Umm, webetter finish class, professor.” you whispered. He looked around cautiously, a smile curling at his lips. The females were fanning themselves with their folders, and the guys were wide-eyed and slack jawed. The was utter silence as Namjoon began to talk.
“Well, umm, class. That is how you can tell if you are giving and receiving proper oral from someone you’re with. Review your notes, and if you get the chance, practice what your learned. I may give, pardon the pun, an oral test next week. Class is dismissed.
He quickly pulled finished dressing before the doors opened, helping you up into a sitting position. He aided you in getting your top back on and helping you down from the desk.
“I think we may need to talk about what just happened.” You said as you stood up, legs still wobbly. “I’m not saying what just happened was bad, but what happened during it.” You were hoping he would understand without you having to come out and say anything.
“Y/N. I have wanted to be with you like that for the past year. I couldn’t sit back and not do anything about it anymore. I will probably get fired for being with you, but I don’t care any more. I’m in love with you and I want the world to know it.”
You stepped to him, cupping his face in your hands. You forced him to look at you.
“Namjoon, I would be lying to both of us if I said I didn’t fell the exact same way. After what just happened, I am irrevocably yours, if you’ll have me. I only want you, only want to be with you, in every way. “ You kissed him, hoping you could show him how true your words were, when speaking them wasn’t enough. When you broke away, only parting because your lungs were desperate for air, he wrapped you in his arms.
“By the way, you would have gotten five stars and an A plus plus if that was your test.” You smacked his shoulder, your cheeks a bright hot red. He kissed the tip of your nose before pulling you closer. His chin rested on the top of your head as you placed your ear to his chest. His still rapidly beating say a thousand unspoken words.
“I love you Y/N. I think I always have, since the day you first stepped into my classroom three years ago.”
“I love you too, Joon. Always will.”
“That’s professor Joon to you.” He smiled down at you, his dimples deep and eyes bright. Yeah,being Teacher’s Aide had a whole new meaning now.
tagging my smut squad of beauties
@jungkook-me-down @namjoonieftw @seoulsunshineandstories @aspaceformyself @xjamlessparkx @flora-jimin @jinitude
@namluve
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Simple Galaxy
Edit: namjin-fangirling-again (that’s me!)
DO NOT REPOST!
first edit haha
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Official Post
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Welcome to the kimlinenetwork! This network was made as a way to appreciate the Kim line of BTS. This includes Taehyung, Seokjin, and Namjoon. We will do everything we can to ensure this network remains a safe environment for all content creators, new and old.
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The Bough That Broke Pt. 2
Synopsis: Jin is injured from an avoidable accident, leaving him partially paralyzed from the waist down. Reader is the nurse that is hired to take care of him once he gets back to the dorms and begins the physically and emotionally painful road to recovery. Will she have what it takes to spark determination in him to get back on the stage?
Characters: Idol!Jin x Nurse!Reader
Genre: Whump, Angst, Itty Bittyamount of crack, itty bitty amount of fluff, maybeeeeeee some smut
Warnings: First few chapters are rough, starting out of the gate with the Angst and Whump. I’m sorry!!! Don’t hate me for hurting Jin…. pretty please!!I promise to make him all better in the end!
Word Count: 5280
Each Chapter will get its own warnings. If anything is a trigger, please read at your own discretion
cr to gif owner
The clock on the wall had just struck one a.m. when a tired looking nurse entered the room. Yoongi was first to his feet, the remenants of his anger still present. Jimin’s hand still clung to Yoongi’s, as if to ground him.
“We have him stable. He is being taken into surgery as we speak.”
“Surgery? For what? Please just tell us what’s going on.” Jungkook pleads.
“MRI showed two shattered vertebrae at his L4 and L5. the vertebrae below those are damaged as well. We don’t know the extent of the damage until we get him under.” She looked to Namjoon who was now at his feet, hands holding him up on the small table.
“Is he? Is he going to be able to?” he couldn’t bring himself to say the word.
“I can’t answer that, I’m sorry. We will know more once the surgeon sees what he is facing. We will keep you informed throughout the surgery. Please try to rest, it’s going to be a long night.”
She left them alone, promising to fill them in as soon as possible. The six of them sat around the table, heads bowed and shoulders slumped. Occasionally, one would nod off, head hitting the table with a thump, or falling on another’s shoulder.
Four a.m.. Three hours and no news. Jimin, Jungkook and Hoseok were strongly, take that as forcefully ordered, to return to the hotel for some much needed sleep. Taehyung, Yoongi and Namjoon stayed behind, awaiting any bit of an update.
Five a.m. The nurse rapped lightly on the closed door, startling Taehyung from a fitful slumber. Shaking Yoongi and Namjoon awake, they focused their attention on the door.
“Come in” Namjoon’s voice was hoarse from lack of sleep.
It was the same nurse who had been with Jin since his arrival. She sat down at one of the empty chairs, hands resting on her lap. That was not a good sign as far as Namjoon was concerned. Yoongi scooted closer to Taehyung, all of their shoulders touching as they waited for someone to speak up first.
“We are waiting on the surgeon to join us. Your friend’s surgery just finished a short bit ago. Dr. Jo is the top in his field.” There was another knock at the door, a tall man, looking to be in his early forties, came in. He was still in his scrubs, cap still on his head.
He shook each of their hands, asking them to sit down so he could explain what was going on.
“I first want to tell you that your friend is stable. He is on a ventilator only for preventative measures. Hopefully he will come off of that in a few days. That is to make sure he doesn’t develop pneumonia while being immobile. The location of his spinal injury is in his lumbar region, which is his mid-back area. Two of his vertebrae were nearly completely crushed. We were able to remove the bone fragments and stabilize his spinal column. There are a plates and screws holding the vertebrae both above and below the injury. Our primary concern now is to keep swelling at a minimum as he faces the next twenty-four and forty-eight hours. We will not know if there is any permanent paralysis for at least a few weeks, until the swelling has completely diminished. There was a small injury to his head, but nothing serious. He will be closely watched for any secondary complications. The rest is up to him at this point. He seemed to be in very good health otherwise,which is a plus in his favor for healing. He will be transferred to the ICU unit where we can keep a close eye on him. I suggest you go back to your hotel and get some sleep. You can come back tomorrow and check on him.”
Namjoon thanked the surgeon and the nurse. Once they left, he turned to his fellow members, tears streaming down his cheeks. Taehyung embraced him, Yoongi joining as they finally let themselves cave after trying to hold themselves together.
By the time they arrived back at the hotel, their feet were dragging, and they had no more tears left to cry. They relayed the information to the other three before collapsed onto their beds.
Hoseok had been busy after they returned to the hotel. Making phone calls, researching the setup crew, anything and everything he could do to uncover what had happened. His last call was to the crew manager.
"There were two young women who showed up early that morning. Said they were from the local staffing company. They had credentials and proof of employment. I handed them over to Jongdae. He can tell you where he placed them."
"I had them help with lighting. They were eager to assist, told me they had experience with lighting and set up." Jongdae gave Hoseok their names and company they worked for.
Hoseok waited until Namjoon awoke later that afternoon before sharing what he had gathered through his phone calls. He recalled the two young ladies that had approached them before the concert and wished them good luck. “That had to be them, Joon. They sabotaged the set! I’m going to fucking kill them, Joon, I swear!”
Namjoon wrapped his arms around Hoseok, the younger man falling to the floor in a sobbing heap. “He’s going to come back to us Hobi, we have to believe that.” He rocked his friend until he was calm, helping him to his feet as they walked to Yoongi and Jungkook’s room.
“Guys we have to get packed up. They will be here soon to take us back to the dorms.” Namjoon announced to everyone.
“We can’t leave Jin here. He needs us. We need to be there for him when he wakes up.” Jimin was nearly screaming, and Hobi had to set him straight before they received any complaints.
“We will all take turns coming to stay with him. He will never be alone, I promise. We can take rotation, going in groups of two. Now get going, gather your things and meet me downstairs in thirty.” He left the room, leaving the remaining five to set the visitation schedule. Thirty minutes later, they were piling into the van, Yoongi and Hoseok taking first rounds of staying behind. Namjoon told them he would be back later tomorrow, after filling everyone in on the events that had transpired. The ride back was long and tedious. Namjoon was on the phone the entire trip, talking with police and the company that the two girls had given as their place of employment.
The moment they arrived back at BigHit, Namjoon and Jungkook were at the offices. They met with detectives, gave heir barely remembered descriptions of the girls, and set about discussing their schedules.
“We are not doing anything until we know that Jin is out of the woods.” It was agreed that they could adjust their schedules to accommodate staying with Jin at the hospital. When they returned to the dorms, Taehyung was pacing the floor, nails bitten to the quick. As soon as he heard the door open, he was running to greet them. He was to wired to sit still as everyone talked over the other, passing along the latest information on the two girls and that investigation. Just as they were about to turn in for the night, Namjoon’s phone rang. They circled around as he put it on speaker.
“It’s Yoongi. I just wanted to give you an update. He is sleeping. They tested his nerve responses, and-” The choked sob had Namjoon sinking into a chair.
“Joon? They didn’t get a positive response. They said it could be temporary. We’ll just have to wait and see.”
“I’m getting ready to leave soon. I want one of you to come back and get rested up. They need one of you here, to be their support system.” Namjoon, hung up, rising from the seat with effort. He headed to his room without a word and packed a small overnight bag. After making sure that the others were settled and comfortable, he called for a driver. Pulling his face mask up and pulling the ball cap down just above his eyes, he headed out the door and for the two hour ride back to Jin.
When he arrived, Yoongi and Hoseok met him in the private conference room once again. They gathered around, Hoseok filling Namjoon in on everything from the night before.
“He isn’t our Jin, right now. He is puffy and covered in bandages and tubes. I thought I was looking at a robot, not Jin. I’m really scared for him Joon. What if- What if he never gets to walk again?”
Namjoon shook his head at Hoseok’s words. He wasn’t going to accept a fate for Jin where he would never walk again, never set foot on another stage. He made a silent vow, that he would do whatever it took to have his hyung next to him, singing his heart out. He told Hoseok and Yoongi to go home and rest, and that Taehyung would be by later to stay with him. They hugged, and left Namjoon alone with his thoughts.
Next round of visitation was approaching, and Namjoon was let in through the staff entrance. He stood outside Jin’s room, willing himself to steady his nerves and think positively. His hand reached for the handle, pushing it open as quietly as possible. His eyes lifted up, and what was before him broke his heart and filled his eyes with tears he thought he no longer could release.
Jin was lying so very still, wires and tubes coming from every direction. His head was bandaged, his neck still supported in a brace, and machines beeping and humming. His chest rose and fell with a smoothness, too automated to be natural. His face was swollen, as were his hands. Namjoon, reached down, taking two puffy fingers in his hand and wept. This truly wasn’t the Jin he remembered, and he longed to see Jin’s smile more than anything.
“I’m here Jin. We are trying to find who is responsible for all of this, and we will bring them to justice for you. Just rest now, get better. You will be on that stage again, standing with your brothers, singing like you’ve never sang before. We will walk with you every step of the way. We will be your strength and your encouragement. We aren’t BTS if you are not with us, you make us whole.” He kept Jin’s fingers in his hand as he sat down beside him, taking the few precious moments to watch his friend, his brother, sleep and recover. When his time was up, he headed back to the private waiting area, pulling out his phone and texting the group.
He is resting. Please give him encouragement today whenever you think of him.
Send him all the positive energy you can muster. Rest today brothers, sleep and eat well.
After hitting send, he leaned back in the chair, closing his eyes for a moment of peace and reflection. The door opening roused him from his thoughts, and he gave a weak smile to Taehyung as he walked in. He explained how Jin looked, not wanting Taehyung to be shocked when next visitation came around. It still wasn’t enough of a warning. Taehyung entered the room at the next visit, only to take one look at jin and leave. Namjoon, found him sitting in the private meeting room curled into himself in the far corner.
“I know it’s hard to see him right now, but remember, most of that is just very temporary. They just want him to be comfortable and still while he recovers. He needs to know that we are here for him.”
“I can’t, hyung! I can’t see him like that, and not feel helpless. I’m sorry, but it’s just too difficult right now.” Taehyung looked up at Namjoon, cheeks damp and eyes still spilling over with tears. Namjoon felt helpless himself, but he had to be strong for his members. If they saw him crumble under the weight he now carried, he knew he would fail them as a leader.
The next two days were a whirlwind of rotating visits and drifting through the time of wait and see. By the fourth day, they had started weaning Jin from the medically induced coma and the ventilator. It was a slow process, but the others were anxious to see him open his eyes for the first time since the accident.
They had gathered around the meeting room table, eating lunch, when a nurse cracked the door open, peeking her head around the edge. They snapped their heads up, a look of fear carved on each face. They were never disturbed, unless it was something serious.
“Which one of you is Kim Namjoon?” she asked softly, a kind smile on her face.
Namjoon raised his hand then stood.
“That would be me. May I help you?” he scanned over the others giving them a hopeful glance.
“Yes sir. I just wanted to let you know that your friend is coming out of the coma and is starting to wake up. His vent was removed just a few minutes ago and he is breathing on his own. If you would like a few of you at a time can come and see him.” She told them where to go, and they decided that Namjoon and Yoongi should go visit him first. The rest were too nervous and afraid of scaring or overwhelming him.
Yoongi stood behind Namjoon as the door was opened. There on the bed was a very scared and groggy Jin. His eyes flashed in their direction, eyes going wide as he took in their expressions. As hard a Namjoon tried to hide his concern, Jin was able to read him like a book. When he spoke, it was barely audible, scratchy and hoarse.
“Joon? What-” Namjoon hushed him while Yoongi came from behind him as stood next to Jin’s bed. He placed his hand over Jin’s, giving it a tender but firm squeeze. Jin gazed at his friends, worry etching the corners of his eyes and forehead.
“Don’t try to talk. You’ve been through a lot, so just try to rest. We will tell you everything when your feeling up to it.” Yoongi tried to easy Jin’s worry, but Jin was having none if it. He shook his head, wincing at the throbbing pain from the movements.
“Why? Why can’t I feel my legs? Joon? Yoongi? Please.” Jin was beginning to panic, and Namjoon had to tamper the rising fear quickly.
“It’s just temporary. Do you remember anything? There was an accident. But your alive and getting better, That’s all that matters right now. The others will come see you when you are a bit more alert and rested. Just try to get some sleep. Worrying isn’t healthy for you right now. Besides you have nothing to worry about at the moment, except recovering and getting back home.” He smiled at Jin, hoping it was good enough to reassure his hyung. Jin nodded, then closed his eyes. Just as Yoongi was about to let go of his hands, Jin gripped it firmly, not letting go.
“Don’t leave me.” he pleaded.
“Jin, hyung, we can’t stay for long, but one of us will be back in later to visit. Now go back to sleep. You’re in good hands.” He let his hand slip from Jin’s grip and left. Namjoon told him to sleep and followed Yoongi out the door.
As soon as they were out the door, Jin let out everything he had been holding in. He was scared. He didn’t remember what happened, didn’t know where he was, and was terrified that he couldn’t feel anything from the waist down. He silently cried himself to sleep, only waking when Hoseok and Jimin entered two hours later for the next round of visits. Hoseok had Jin smiling, telling him some of his own dad jokes. It was a relief to see him smile, and Taehyung knew at that moment, that no matter what, Jin was going to be okay and they would be there on his journey.
Later that evening, the six of them were granted permission to visit Jin together. His eyes lit up when they all filed in through the door, one after the other. He pushed his hands against the mattress, wanting to sit up, forgetting the dead weight and brace that hindered him. His head turned away, letting it shake back and forth in defeat. Jungkook and Jimin stood on either side of him, grabbing the small sheet underneath Jin. They easily scooted him back to the head of the bed, straightening the pillows around him once he was comfortable.
“I hate this damn brace. I can’t sit up, I can’t move. This is not living, this is being a prisoner in your own body.” Clenching a fist, he slammed it against the bedrails, startling Namjoon who was sitting beside him.
“I know it’s hard right now Jin, but you’ll be out of it soon, I pro-” Jin cut him short.
“Don’t promise me something that you can’t back up, Joon! Not one of you have told me anything about what happened. All the nurses and doctors tell me is that I was in an accident and injured my back. So someone better fucking tell me what the hell happened that I am stuck in the foresaken place, flat on my back, and paralysed!” His face was red, voice raised enough to have a nurse rushing in to check if everything was okay. Namjoon nodded to Hoseook who stepped back out with the nurse.
“Do you think you’re ready to know what happened? Do you want to know, deep down, everything we know?” Namjoon looked back to Jin as he spoke, his tone stern and demanding. Jin let his gaze settle on his leader, a small nod telling him to continue.
“What do you last remember? Do you even remember the concert?” Jin told him the last thing he remembered was getting ready for his solo.
“You were performing your solo, the part where you walk out to the front of the stage. The lighting fixture had been improperly set up, the support beam wasn’t bolted in place. There were some females who weaseled their way into stage set up, just to get close to us. We are searching for them now. The beam and light fell on you, and that is why you’re in here now. You had surgery on your back to repair damaged vertebrae and plates, rods, and screws are holding you together right now. The paralysis could be temporary. Or.” Namjoon could not bring himself to finish.
“Or permanent.” Jin concluded. Namjoon just bowed his head. “Well, I refuse to let this be permanent. Look at me Joon. This is not going to be that. I will be back on my feet again.” Jin was determined and it showed in his features. His jaw was set, eyes focused.
Each of them agreed with Jin, wether just to encourage or real believing it, but Jin needed to hear their positive words. One by one, they left, until it was just Jimin and Jungkook.
“Can I tell you something?” Jin chimed in before they walked out.
“Sure, anything. What’s up?” Jimin turned to walk back to Jin’s bed. Sitting in the chair beside the bed, he scooted closer. Jin’s hand searched out for Jimin’s, then Jungkook’s. Taking both of their hands in his he looked between them before swallowing hard and choking back tears.
“Don’t let them get discouraged, okay. But I’m scared, really scared. I have lost almost a week and I’m afraid that I will never walk again, let alone leave my bed. Don’t say anything to Namjoon, promise me.” Jimin wiped away his tears before nodding.
“We won’t, promise.”
“Good, now go away and sleep, you all look like shit. I don’t want to see you all until tomorrow. “ Jin gave a weak grin before shooing them out the door. When he was finally alone, sure that they were out of ear shot, he gave his heart permission to let out the anger, fear, and hatred. He screamed, cried, cursed the heavens and hell. His nurse came rushing back in, making sure he was okay before she went to get him something to help him relax and sleep.
Sleep, the only escape from this hell he was living.
(Three Weeks Later)
Jin was now allowed to sit up, but still had to wear the brace. He was trying to gain some of his weight back, now that he was allowed to eat regular food that the others snuck in for him. He was starting light therapy. Building back his upper body strength. He had regained some feeling in his legs, but not enough to hold his bodyweight upright. He had hard days, and nights. But through every day, one of members were by his side, encouraging, learning this therapy, taking his mind off his frustration as much as possible. It was during one of these therapy sessions that he was informed of the preparations to send him home with home health. The hospital’s home health staff would be meeting with them all later that evening, once everyone came for their nightly visits.
“You’ll get the best care when you get home Mr. Kim. The staff is amazing and their main goal is to get you back on your feet. You’ll get to meet those who will be working with you before you get home. They will tour your home and make any needed arrangements first.” Jin’s mind was flooded with this new information. How would he do once he was back at the dorm? The changes that would need to be made would throw chaos into the mix.
Evening rounds were being made, and Jin had mentioned meeting with home health. They handed Jin the take out bag, even handing him the soda that Taehyung pretended was his. Jin scarfed it down, relishing in the juicy burger and fries.
“So, they are getting you ready to go home? That’s great news, Jin. That means your getting better every day.” Yoongi tousled his hair, earning a mock glare from his hyung.
“Yeah, I suppose. I’m just know that there are going to be changes made, like moving furniture, adding a ramp and other things. I will have to move rooms too.” he sighed as he thought of all that was about to happen because of him.
“Actually we already moved rooms. You have the one closest to the bathroom and with the most space. We moved furniture around already too. The staff is coming tomorrow to see what else may need to be done.” Jungkook slyly smiled at his friend, knowing that he had given up his room for Jin. He didn’t mind, but wanted to ensure Jin that he was perfectly fine with it. Just as Jin finished his food, the home health staff came in. There was physical therapy, occupational therapy, case manager, and you, his new nurse. Each staff member introduced themselves, leaving you for last. You sat on the side of his bed, a bright happy grin on your face. You extended your hand to the other six before turning to the side and greeting Jin.
“Hello Mr. Kim, my name is Y/N. I am going to be your new favorite person and your newest enemy.” Jin cocked an eyebrow at your statement, which had you hurrying to clarify.
“What I mean by that is this. You will be seeing me every day. Even when you don’t want to. My job is not to see you only when you feel like it. I am there to make sure that your therapy is going as it should, and that your pain is managed, with precise strictness, and to help you with some of the therapy. You will be seeing a lot of me. Twelve hours a day to be precise. So wether you like me or not, I am going to do my best to get you back on your feet and walking again with the help of these other staff members. And as far as you all are concerned, I’m not just here for Jin, I am here to help you guys with this transition too. If you ever have any concerns or questions,I will do my best to help. So, do you have any questions for us?”
Jin was looking at you with a blank expression. You were cute and chipper and all, but twelve hours a day? He could barely stay awake half the day as it was. How was he going to tolerate some chipper, always happy and smiling person making him do things he didn’t want to do?
“Twelve hours? You’ve got to be kidding me.” Everyone looked at Jin, who was seriously looking like he was shocked that you were planning on that much time, each day.
“Yes, twelve. We will tour your place tomorrow morning, and start getting you ready to go home. It was nice meeting you all, I look forward to working with you.” You shook Jin’s hand, then bowed as you left them alone.
“Guys, I don’t know about this. Isn’t it too early for me to be going home yet? I mean, I can’t even get out of bed by myself, or even. You know. Go to the bathroom without help. And besides, I don’t want some female seeing me, well, undressed. Can’t we get a male nurse at least?” He shrugged at the look Namjoon gave him.
“I have met the staff already, and she is the best from what they’ve told me. She takes her job very seriously, and she only takes select cases, private duty cases. She has worked with some of the most elite and famous people. She has security clearance and everything. You have the top of the top on your case, Jin. Trust her and at least give her a chance, okay.” Jin agreed, reluctantly, and the conversation drifted to other things.
The day had finally come that Jin would be going home. You came to his room early, paperwork in hand. You pulled the chair up beside his bed, setting the papers on the small table.
“Now, let’s see what you can do. Physical therapy is on their way and we are going to get you up in this chair so you can sign paperwork.” You removed your badge and set it at the foot of the bed. Jack from physical therapy entered, a long board and woven belt in hand. He handed you the belt which you wrapped around jin’s waist, securing it in the front. He watched you, curious why Jack wasn’t getting him ready instead.
“Umm, isn’t Jack going to get me up?” You laughed, but quickly recovered when you saw his surprised look.
“I’m going to be the one doing most of the lifting with you. Are you afraid I can’t do it? Let me get one thing clear, Mr. Kim. I may be smaller than you, but I have lifted men twice your size with ease. You just have to trust me. I am not going to let anything happen to you, as long as you are working with me and not against me.” That being said, you reached around his waist, gathering the belt in your hands. Telling him to lean his upper body towards you, you maneuvered his feet into place with your own foot. Once he was in place, you rocked back twice, lifting him off the bed with the third rock. You skillfully and carefully turned him and lowered him gently to the chair. Straightening up, you smiled down at him.
“See, that wasn’t so bad now, was it?”
Jin huffed, looking to you, then to Jack, as if to question if it was. Jack chuckled under his breath, giving you a wink.
"I told you, she's the best. Next time though, don’t fight against her. Lean into her, not away." Jack explained how body mechanics play a huge role in staying safe.
After finishing the paperwork for his release, Jin asked to stay in the chair for a bit. " It's nice to be upright for once." You agreed to give him fifteen minutes if he could tolerate it.
"Don't overdo it. The minute you start to hurt or get uncomfortable let me know. You may have some feeling, but you're still at a great risk for problems." You plumped the pillow behind his back, then took a seat on the side of his bed, clipboard in hand. "So tell me a bit about yourself, your likes, your goals, anything that will help me to get to know you and understand you better."
Jack was working on stretching Jin's legs, keeping them limber and loose. Jin, in the meantime, was finding it very difficult to focus on the question while his legs were being manipulated into near inhuman positions.
"Ma'am, I'm having a time trying to concentrate on what he's doing, let alone answer questions that you can easily find out from the others. Not trying to be rude or anything, but could one of you wait until the other is finished?" You could tell Jin was becoming agitated. His scrunched facial expressions, the grip his hands had on the chair's armrests. He was reaching his point of exasperation, and you needed to defuse his ticking time bomb before it blew.
"Why don't we stop then for today, and start again tomorrow back at the dorm. I'll get him to help me get you back in bed, and then we can turn in the papers and get you out of here." You and Jack got him situated back in the bed, pillows stuffed and fluffed like a nest around him. The content look on his face was enough to tell you he had already had a long day, and it has only started. You saw Jack out, turning back to Jin, only to find him already asleep.
"You’re going to be a tough one Mr. Kim, but we will get you back on your feet. You have my word on that." You left, turning the light off and shutting the door behind you. Sitting at the nurses desk, you pulled Jin’s chart from the rack. You wanted to get things moving quickly, your gut telling you that once he was home, his true demeanor would emerge and his facade would falter. You needed to see who he was deep inside. The drive that would emerge, once he admitted to his new limitations, hinged on him accepting them first.
It was always the same, with each patient you worked with. They would have a honeymoon mentality of their predicament, think that it was only going to be a few days, weeks at most, before they were back on their feet. The sooner you got them to the point of recognizing that it wasn’t going to be easy, and that there were going to be struggles and realities that they didn’t want to face, the sooner they could truly begin to heal and make strides in their recovery. You had seen it hundreds of times, and you would see it a hundred more. Sighing, you placed the papers he had signed into his chart, closing it with a loud thud.
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Phases
@lacabloodclatzette asked:
hi! i absolutely love your writing do you think you could make a namjoon imagine based of the song phases by prettymuch? thank you love! ❤️
Here ya go sweetie! Sorry it took so long to get out to you. Hope you like it.
Oh-oh-oh, hey
I know you're tryin' to do you but you fell over
After a couple bad nights And 20 cold hearts (Mhm)
Tryin' to find a new you but I heard you got lost
Tryin' to figure your worth
What the hell does that cost?
He watched you from the sidelines, always right there, waiting and hoping. Every year, when you were no longer happy with the way you were, you would come back a newer version of yourself. But he always wanted you the way you were when you were both kids. The fresh faced, kind hearted, beautiful soul you that you used to be. College came, and so did another you.
“Y/N?” Namjoon questioned when he saw you walk into your first lecture together.
“Hey Joon.” You looked surprised, even though you had both talked about having one class together each semester.
“You had dyed your hair some combination of vivid rainbow colors. Your make-up was heavy, eyes done up a bit too dark for his liking. Namjoon just shrugged his shoulders, and continued talking.
“Wow. You really did it up this time huh? Anyway, here, I saved you a seat.” He moved his bag, allowing you to plop down beside him. You lugged your notebook and several pens out, placing them on the long table in front of you.
“Yeah. I wanted to stand out this first semester, you know, push the limits. Besides this is college, you can be whoever you want and no one will really care.” You situated yourself and waited for class to start. “You going to the party tonight?”
“The first weekend of college party? The one where everyone will be smashed out of their minds and not remember a damn thing tomorrow? Sure, I’m here for it.” He rolled his eyes. He knew he would go, just to keep an eye on you. He was your self appointed guardian, or so he thought of himself as such. You were always the outgoing one, the party-goer that was the life of the party. He always watched out for you, keeping all the horny seniors away with his threats of misery if they ever touched you. He would take you home at the end of the night, help you change into your pyjamas, and tuck you into bed. He would then set a glass of water by your bed for when you woke up.
The weekend was in full swing. You got ready with some of your roommates, opting for the skin tight black skirt that rode up a bit too high when you walked, the see through black netted tank with your lacy black bra underneath. You wore your black net stockings and black knee high boots to complete your look.
“Y/N. You will definitely knock some guy off his rocker tonight!” Che said from behind you as you smoothed over your outfit one last time. You kissed her cheek, downing the last of the glass of whiskey on your dresser.
“Let’s go fishing girls!” you screamed as you headed for the door, a huge grin on your bright red lips.
Fraternity row was bustling, people everywhere. There were jocks, preppies, bookworms, and the outsiders. Everyone mingled with each other, already going off in pairs.
Namjoon sat on the stairs of one fraternity, scanning the crowd for you. When he caught sight of you he shook his head. Tonight was not going to be fun for him, he could feel it in the air.
You mingled here and there, a red solo cup always full in your hand. You had last count after the fifth one, not caring how drunk you got tonight. This was the first night of the rest of your life, you thought. If only you knew then.
Come two a.m., Namjoon had finally found you for the umpteenth time. You were half laying on some guys lap, his hands caressing your arms in a way that made Namjoon’s stomach churn. The guy’s hand was inching its way to your barely covered breast. Namjoon grabbed his wrist, jerking it away at the last minute.
“Hey! What’s up? She’s mine tonight!” The stupidly drunk guy hollered.
“Yeah, Joonie! I’m his tonight! He’s gonna take me home, and then ya know what? We’re gonna-” Namjoon, covered your mouth with his hand, not wanting to hear the end of the statement.
“Joonie!” Your protest muffled by his hand. He removed it so you could continue. “Joonie. Really! I’m a big girl now! Just leave me alone. Imma gonna have some fun.”
Namjoon shook his head, leaving you without a word. You watched with hazy glazed eyes as he walked away. You left that night with that guy, and regretted it the next morning. You woke up with puke all over your bed and clothes, the guy naked and sprawled out on your twin bed. You hurried to the bathroom, emptying your stomach of last night’s contents. When you finished, you slowly made your way to the sink. What was looking back at you was a disaster. There was a bruise on your cheek, your make-up was smeared, and your hair, well that would take a week to untangle. You quickly washed your face, not liking the minimal improvement.
Namjoon stayed up all night, worrying about you. But you had made it very clear you didn’t want him to interfere. Instead, he waited until morning and texted you.
Namjoon
Wanted to make sure you got home okay
Your phone chirped, the sound making your hangover worse by the second. You picked it up, seeing Namjoon name in bold. You pulled up the text, rolling your eyes when you saw it.
Y/N
Yes dad. I’m home.
Namjoon saw your response, his heart breaking a little when he saw the condescending name you gave him.
The rotation of school and partying went on every week for the first full month of school. You stayed up late, trying to catch up, only to get further behind by the weekend. Namjoon watched over you from afar, never trying to save you from yourself.
After your fourth weekend of going home with some stranger, sometimes waking up in a place you didn’t know, you realized that you were sinking. You always had Namjoon to save you. He always took you home and cared for you. That was, until you told him you didn’t need him anymore. But you were sure he would come around eventually, right?
Like clockwork, he would check with you via text and that was all. He even avoided you in class. You were starting to miss him. But you weren’t sure why. Sure, you had made out with him when you were in high school. But it never went past the heavy petting and deep kissing. This particular morning, for some strange reason, you thought back to those days. Namjoon, sitting in his dorm, was doing the exact same thing.
Great minds always think alike.
Aye!
When I'm kissing ya, grippin' ya thigh
I realized you are destined and meant to be mine
Who am I to conflict with you living your life
Just know when you call
I'm at the end of the line
Damn those were the days. He knew from the first time he kissed you, he wanted you to be his. Unfortunately, his brain told him to ignore his heart, that you would never want to date him. He was a complete one-eighty from you. But he was there when you needed a shoulder to cry on, when you needed someone to bounce ideas off of. He was THAT GUY. The friend-zoned friend.
I'll practice my patience
While you're getting wasted
'Til fate brings you home
I'll wait through your phases
You'll shuffle through phases
Like songs on your playlist
'Til fate brings you home
I'll wait through your phases
Namjoon waited for you to come around, but it seemed like it would never happen. After the first semester, you changed yourself once again. The novelty of partying was beginning to wear thin, the chance of you failing bringing you around. This time you were close to being the girl from your childhood. You hair was back to your natural color, your make-up softer, you personality friendlier. The two of you were starting to get back on track, until you met Jin. Once again, Namjoon had let the opportunity slip through his fingers to tell you how he felt. He was still there when you called him with news of your first date. He comforted you when you and Jin broke up. He even helped you get back up and back out there. When Jimin came along, he forced his fake smile, greeting Jimin with a cool ‘hello’. Namjoon was always there to pick you up and dust you off. He would always be THAT FRIEND. The friend that loved you in secret.
Hitting all the right cues
And you leaving your mark
But that ain't you (Ain't you)
You're just playing your cards, baby
Tryna fit in those shoes but you take it too far (Too far)
It doesn't matter where it takes you
I'll go wherever you are
Oh-oh
When you moved in with Jimin, Namjoon helped you move your belongings.
“Are you sure this is what you want to do? It’s a bit away from campus.”
“Joon, yes I am sure. I’ll get there on time. Seriously don’t worry about me. Thank you, but I am good, I promise.” You smiled at him, kissing his cheek quickly as you took the last box from him. When you had everything in its place, you and Jimin thanked him with a quick meal. Namjoon ate, then saw himself out as you settled in for your first night with Jimin. The next morning Namjoon set about finding a place close to you, for the just in case. He moved in his new place quietly, not letting you know.
I'll wait, I'll wait through your phases, phases
I'll wait, I'll wait through your phases, phases
For you, I'll wait through your phases, phases
I'll wait, I'll wait
I'll wait through your phases, oh
It was three months later, Namjoon had settled into a routine of making sure you made it to class when you couldn’t get a ride, always telling you he was close by for whatever reason. You would talk about your future with Jimin, the plans the two of you had made. A future that didn’t seem to include him. Namjoon just smiled and nodded, telling you he was happy for you.
Yeah, I'm really tired of being soft-spoken
You got me broken
Writing songs about you daily and it's messing with my focus
You fucked with him but we both realize that he was bogus
I'm the one for you but why do I feel like I'm go unnoticed
I'm talking more than clothes hitting floors
We're falling off track but not the rack like a chore
The call came at three in the morning. Namjoon, blindly searched for his phone on his night stand.
“Hello?”
The sobs coming from the other end had him sitting up and wide awake in two seconds flat. You were crying, and the sound of your heart being wrenched from your chest had his nerves on high alert.
“Y/N? What’s wrong? Talk to me.” He waited as you tried to halt your tears enough to speak.
“He. Jimin. He’s been cheating on me!” The keen wail emitted from your chest had Namjoon jumping out of bed and looking for his clothes.
“I’m on my way. Just tell me where you are.”
“At the park.” You had left your ideal lie of a home, seeking solitude and to cry. Your dreams were shattered, your future destroyed in one singular moment.
Namjoon found you sitting on the swings, rocking back and forth, shoulders shaking with each sob that echoed through the night air. He came up beside you, sitting in the swing next to you. He didn’t say anything letting you guide the conversation when you were ready.
You sat in silence, afraid to say something. You knew that you had taken him for credit all this time. You knew he was always there, even after you told him to leave you alone. You thought back to all the times he was watching and waiting, your knight in shining armor. The one you put on the back burner while you lived your life and he patiently let you forget about him and your friendship.
Oh look, another butterfly, feel it in my core
Even though you ain't mine it's the fact that I'm yours
It's the fact my life ain't complete without yours
It's the fact that at night I be trying to ignore
Catching overseas flights just to knock on your door
“I’m sorry Joonie. I didn’t mean to have you come out here this late. I just needed someone to talk to.” You finally looked up at him. The look in his eyes made your breath hitch in your throat. He was tired, hair still a mess from sleeping, but he was there. He was always there when you called. He would traverse the earth if you asked him to. He would weather any storm, sail every sea, fly across the world if you just called him. He was THAT MAN. The man that would fight the world for you, if you only asked.
'Cause you put my planet in orbit
But, star girl your body's so soft
Look, I promise you, baby, I'm sober
Just wait 'til you give in and finally come over
I can't wait to tell you
I told ya, I told ya, I told ya
“Let’s go home, Y/N. I’ll fix you some breakfast and coffee. We can talk there.”
You looked at him, confused.
“Go home? Have you been drinking Joon? I’m not going back home.”
“Silly, home with me. Like I would let you step foot back in that place with his cheating worthless ass. He doesn’t know what he had.” You chuckled, though half-heartedly.
“You’re right. He doesn’t does he?” Namjoon stood and took your hand, helping you up. It felt so right, your hand in his. Like it was home. HE drove you to his place, laughing nervously when you asked how long he lived so close to you.
“Do you think I would let you go on some hairbrained escapade and not be there to catch you when you fall? Y/N, I will always be close by for you. I will always be there for you. Always.” He led you inside, sitting you on the couch and covering your lap with his blanket. Your favorite blanket of his. The blanket you always curled up under when you were with him.
“You still have this old thing?” You asked. He was in the kitchen, making coffee.
“How could I get rid of your blanket? You would kill me if I threw that thing out.” He was right. It was basically your blanket, since you were the one that claimed it every time you came over when you were younger. That blanket held so many memories.
“Thank you Joon, for everything. I can’t believe I didn’t see it coming.” You sighed heavily. Namjoon came back in carrying two mugs of steaming hot coffee.
“I tried to tell you, Y/N. Remember when you first moved in with him? I asked you if you were sure. I wanted to tell you that I didn’t feel right about it, but you wouldn’t let me. “
“I know. I know I should have always listened to you. You have always been there for me, Joon. Why?” He gazed at you, finding the strength within to tell you how he felt. If he didn't, he knew he never would.
“Because. Even with everything you have done, I have loved you. Every turn, every change, every thing. All the phases, I have loved you through every one. I will always love you.”
You jaw dropped, your eyes wide, as you took in what he was saying.
“Always? You have always loved me? Even when? Even when I did all those things?” You suddenly felt embarrassed and shy. He had been there through all your highs and especially through every low. “But. But why?”
“You are my entire world, Y/N. WIthout you, I’m not complete. I would have stayed by you until the end, if it meant having you in my life, in some way. I will always love you, It has always been you.” He poured his heart out to you. It was your turn to be there for him as he cried, telling you the pain he felt when you pushed him away. How his heart broke for you every time yours broke.
“Joonie. I’m so sorry. I wish you would have told me. I would never have put you through all of this. I would have saved us both so much grief if you had told me sooner.”
Both of us? What do you mean?” you took his hand in yours, holding it to your chest.
“I never told you how I felt because you never let on that you had feelings for me. All of those others were because I was trying to fill a place that was empty. That place was only for you. I have loved you since forever, Namjoon. I will always love you.”
“You know, for us to be educated college students, we were pretty dumb huh?”
“Maybe, but at least we wised up, and found each other at last.” You leaned close, your lips just a hairsbreadth from his. “How about we see if we can remember how each other kisses?” With that, you pressed your lips to his. It was soft, natural. It was home. You and Namjoon, together, was the final phase you would ever go through.
@lacabloodclatzette @kwonnansi @aspaceformyself @xjamlessparkx
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Always, Forever
A/N: I don’t know why I had to write this heartbreaking piece!
Characters: Jin x Reader
Genre: Ghost! AU
Warnings: heart breaking angst
Word Count: 1354
Jin stood in the doorway of the bedroom you shared with him. His shoulder rested against the frame as he watched you sleep. You were still wearing the shirt from two days before, crumpled and torn in places. When you stirred, he straightened himself, bowing his head low, not wanting to see your face. You struggled to roll over, whimpering as you readjusted yourself for the umpteenth time. Your face was puffy, hair matted to your forehead from sweat. You roused yourself from the fitful slumber, sitting up and leaning back against the headboard. Looking around the room, your eyes settled on where Jin was standing. He perked up at your slight movement, only to look away when he saw your damp and red eyes. He had watched you cry, over and over again the last two nights, and it tore his heart to shreds. If only you could hear his words, if only you would look at him one more time.
You felt the cool air engulf you, shivering at the sudden nip of cold on your sweat soaked skin. It had been two days since he walked out the door, out of your life for good. You didn’t want to accept it, didn’t want to feel the physical pain that went with him leaving you so suddenly. If only you had one more chance to tell him that you were sorry and that you still loved him.
Jin watched as you pulled the blanket tight around you. He wanted to reach out and wrap you in his arms, nestle you close to his chest and make you warm, but he couldn’t, no matter how hard he tried. When you finally got up, hurrying to the bathroom, he trailed close on your heels. The sound of you throwing up for the hundredth time in the last forty-eight hours had him dropping to his knees beside you. He didn’t dare try to touch you.
Your sobs filled the small bathroom, your body convulsing with each painful peal of agony that racked you. You laid yourself on the cool tile floor, not caring that the cold had followed you in. Your fingers fisted the shirt you were wearing into clenched hands. You tugged it firmly, trying to still feel his arms around you, to inhale the now fading scent of him that still clung to the fabric.
“I miss you, Y/N.” he whispered, head bent close to your ear. Your head moved to the side, a sudden stillness freezing you in your place. His voice still echoed in your head, clear as the day he left you alone.
“I miss you. Why, Jin? Why?” you cried into the air, your voice hoarse from all the crying and screaming you had been doing.
“I don’t know baby, I don’t know. I’m sorry, princess, if I could turn back time, I would. Believe me on that.” He tried to soothe you as he spoke, the words not reaching your ears.
You sat up, knees curled to your chest as you looked around the cramped space. You saw everything that reminded you of him. His toothbrush still in the cupholder, his bottle of cologne you had just given him for his birthday with the cap still off. The towel he had used after the shower still laid on the floor, and you grabbed it up, bringing the soft cotton to your cheek.
“Baby you have to be strong. You have to get up , start living again. I will always be with you. Please, if you don’t do it for yourself, do it for me.” His dark chocolate eyes were swimming in unshed tears as he spoke to you, but you didn’t hear him. Instead, you shook your head, anger rising from somewhere deep within.
“I can’t go on without you, Jin. I don’t want to. You were my everything, my world, my strength. With you gone, im already dead inside.” You cried into the towel, hands clutching it as you buried your face to muffle the screams that emitted from your chest.
“You have to, Y/N. I can’t change what happened, and I’m sorry. If only I had told you that I loved you before I left, instead of leaving you mad. I will never forgive myself.” His apology fell on deaf ears.
Jin turned when he heard the sound of rushing air behind him. Standing just a few feet away was the one person he didn’t want to see. He was dressed in the finest of clothes, all black but shimmering in the faint light of the breaking dawn.
“I’m not ready to go yet. Please just one more day. One more day to make sure she’s going to be okay.” He pleaded with the figure. They only shook their head, letting him know it was timet o go.
“You can’t change the past, Seokjin. The future, her future, is set already. You can do nothing to change her path.” the tone was tender yet firm in it conviction.
“Will she be okay?” Jin gave a hopeful glance at you before he stood. Not matter what the answer was, he knew it would make no difference.
“Can I let her see me one last time? Please, just for a moment, then I will go with you.”
The figure thought it over, finally nodding at Jin. “You have five minutes. Say what you need, then you have to come with me.” Jin exhaled, the act amusing him slightly.
Squeezing his eyes tightly, he gathered all the strength he had left in him, watching as his hands came into view. The audible gasp that escaped you alerted him that you saw him.
“Jin?” Your voice was so, so small. He had never heard you sound so fragile in all the years he had known you.
“Hey baby. I don’t have much time. I just wanted to tell you that I love you. I want you to know that I will always be here.” His hand came to rest over your heart, the warmth no longer there in his touch. “I will never leave this spot. But, I need you to be strong. I need you to pick yourself up, eat something, begin living again. I want you to find love again. I want you to be happy, and I will be here, by your side, and share in your happiness. But you have to go on without me. Promise me your going to do that.” His tears were streaming down his cheeks, your face a mirror image of his. Lifting a trembling hand, you cupped his cheek, falling apart at being able to touch him one more time.
“I miss you so much, Jin. I’m sorry. I’m sorry that we fought that night. I’m sorry I called. It’s my fault you left me.” You crumpled into his chest, his strong arms holding you against him as he smoothed your tangled hair with his hand.
“It’s not your fault princess. It’s noone’s fault. Stop blaming yourself. Just know I love you and that will never change." He lifted your chin, making you look him in the eyes. Tenderly, he pressed his lips to yours, taking the time to burn the feel of you against him into his memory. The figure in the hall cleared it throat, letting Jin know his time was up.
“Baby, it’s time for me to go. I will be watching over you, i’ll never be far away. You can always talk to me, and I’ll be listening.” He stood to his feet, letting your fingers slip from his grasp as he faded away. The mist spreading through the air like a heavy fog. The last image you saw of him, was his face, tearful and pained as he drifted into nothingness. His final words etched forever in your mind.
“I will always love you. Always” and then he was no more.
“I will always love you too, forever” you whispered into thin air.
And so you began the process of keeping your promise. Until you would see him again on the other side of forever.
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Captured Moments Pt. 6
A/N: You are an artist given the chance to work with BigHit Ent. as their Creative Art Director. Getting to spend time with BTS, you form a friendship with them. But With Namjoon, could it grow into something more?
Characters: Namjoon x Artist!Reader
Warnings: soft Namjoon, soft and fluffy OT7, fluffiness galore
Word Count: 1272
WHY IS HE SO FLUFFY!!!!!!!! cr to gif owner
Jin, Taehyung, and Jungkook were playing Overlord on the television when Namjoon got home. "It's about time you.." Jin started before he glanced up and saw Namjoon's wistful look. "What's got you all smiley?" He quipped, a hint of a smile showing. "Did you have a good time today? Y/N really put a lot of thought into your shoot today, didn't she?"
"Yes, yes she did. I wanted to thank you all for helping out with keeping it a secret. I feel refreshed and revitalized", he wasn’t really looking at any of them as he made his way to the kitchen. Jin handed his controller to Jimin and followed Namjoon. Once they were alone, Jin placed a hand on his friend's shoulder. "What happened?"
"Nothing?" Now, Namjoon was not good at lying, especially to Jin.
"Look at me Namjoon." He waited until Namjoon looked at him, a dream look in his eyes. "Shit! Did you? Did you two do something?" Jin's signature smirk came into view and Namjoon covered his hyung's mouth with his hand. "Shhh! You can't tell anyone! But yeah, we kissed. Jin. It was amazing. It felt like, I can't even describe it. But you have to promise me you won't tell anyone. She's afraid of losing her job, and worried that if anyone finds out I'll lose everything too."
"You know you can trust me. So, what now?" Namjoon looked around, making sure no one else could hear them. "we're just going to see how it unfolds. Let time lead. Who knows. I really like her, Jin. She feels like a kindred spirit and when we're together, it's comfortable. We get each other."
"Man, you've got it bad!" Jin laughed, quickly hushing before the others heard.
Stolen glances, finding ways to see each other in the halls, an ‘accidental meeting’ here and there in the cafe. That's how you and Namjoon found ways to connect. Sure, it wasn't ideal, but those moments led to learning about each other. One day at lunch, you told Namjoon about the upcoming shoot for Yoongi's theme. " I know he's struggled with things in his past, I hope it doesn't make him uncomfortable" you told Namjoon over one of the sudden 'run-ins'.
" He's come a long way, he told us that he really liked what you drew up, I think if it bothered him he would have told you."
“I just don’t want to dredge up old memories that would be uncomfortable for him.” You sat back in your chair, mulling over what you had envisioned for Yoongi. He had been vocal in the past about his struggles, even writing a few songs about it. You could only hope that he had come far enough out on the other side to look back and see just how far he had come. “Maybe I can meet with him beforehand, go over it once more before filming.” Namjoon agreed and you pulled out your phone to text him.
Y/N Artist Extraordinaire: Yoongi can you meet with me?
I want to go over your shoot for tomorrow.
Yoongi: Sure, how about later today.
Will be in the recording studio
Come by whenever
You looked at the time, noticing that Namjoon’s lunch break would be over any minute now. “Will I get to see you later?” you asked hopefully. “Yes, of course. We are breaking early tonight, we have an interview tomorrow. Maybe we can catch up before everyone goes to bed?” Just then, his alarm went off, alerting you both that your time together was over. Clearing your table, you walked with him to the elevator, the two of you stepping inside alone. The moment the door closed, he had his arms around you. Pulling you against his tall frame, he bent down, placing a chaste kiss to your lips. You craved more, but knew that the doors would open an second now. Holding his arms for support, you let him lead the moment. He kissed your nose then your forehead, pulling you tightly against him in a hug. “I can’t wait to see you tonight.” He said wistfully.
“Me too.” you whispered against his chest. Feeling the elevator come to a stop, you released each other just in time for the doors to slide open. You told him goodbye, then exited, turning down the long corridor to your studio. After sitting at your desk and accomplishing nothing, you figured it was as good a time as any to go see Yoongi.
You could hear the music wafting down the hall as you approached Yooongi’s studio. You opened the door carefully, making sure to make as little noise as possible. You leaned against the wall, letting the sounds wash over you. When he was here, he was in his own universe. He poured his heart and soul into his music, that was evident. The world around him disappeared as he immersed himself in his art.
“Jenjang!” he swore under his breath. You cleared your throat, letting him know you were there. “Aish! Y/N, you scared me.” He spun in his chair, turning around to face you.
“Sorry Yoongi, I just wanted to listen for a minute. It sound really good. Is this something new?” He nodded, placing his headphones on the soundboard.
“ Yeah, I just can’t seem to get this one part just right. I keep playing it over and over, but something is missing.” You frowned at his frustration. Of all the members, he was the hardest on himself, spending long hours until everything was perfect.
“Maybe setting it aside for a bit will help? Hopefully tomorrow’s shoot will be a good distraction?” You were hoping it would be just that, a time to step away and reflect.
“Ahh, yeah. You wanted to talk about tomorrow. What’s up?” he leaned back in his chair, arms crossed behind his head.
“Well, first off I want to say am really excited for what your shoot will be, but, I want to make sure that you really are okay with it. I mean, I know your theme is a bit dark, so to speak, and I want to ask if you are good with what I am hoping to portray.” He rocked in his chair, thinking over what you had envisioned for him.
“I think I am. I am at a good place right now, and I know that you want to use my theme as a way to reach others. For that alone I am excited for the shoot. Will it be hard? Maybe? But I know your intentions, and I know that you would work with me if any problem arose.” You nodded immediately.
“Of course I would. I want all of you to be at ease during these. I think you will be pleased with the set, and the young man who will be the younger you is very sweet. I think you two will get along nicely.”
“It’s settled then. I really am okay with this, Y/N, so don’t worry. What time do you want me on set?” You told him as soon as the interview was over, to meet you at your studio. The set would be ready when he arrived. Hugging him bye, you got up to leave. Stopping at the door you turned back to him.
“You’ll get it Yoongi, I have faith in you. It’s in there and you will find it. Just don’t fret over it.” He smiled that gummy slime and waved you goodbye. Heading back to the studio you could once again hear the music filling the hallway, a smile on your face.
@min-shookga-yoongi @beautifulseoulliar @agustd-suga-yoongii @astronomyturtle @aspaceformyself @dreamyoongi @holy-yoong i@trashkazuya @maxinaptak @micky1518 @rosiemilas @karri570 @xjamlessparkx
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