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hwsforeignrelations · 10 months

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As a hobby sketchbooker, its a favorite pasttime to go chronologically through old sketchbooks and note improvement. Im gonna supplement the rant below with old art, cuz its relevant and i think they're neat

I accidentally deleted my old tumblr like five months ago which held a similar sentiment (*SOB* but no use crying over split milk)

I see a lot of fan artists getting burnt out. I see a lot of Hetalia artists stay for a bit, then leave for other fandoms (higher pastures, if u will). I use to not understand. How did people become bored so fast?!?!

Ive never been one to switch interests quickly. I was solidly leg deep in my superhero phase 5-8th grade. I started reading exclusively usuk fanfics in 8th grade, and have hardly ventured beyond usuk.

I'm trying to branch out more.

Hetalia is unique in its ability to teach crash course history and have enemy soldiers devouring each others cocks in the same paragraph. Double win!! The concept of international relations translated to human ones, of a nations pain having physical embodiment, of fantastically diverse headcanons dissecting the intrigues of Nation biology... Its all very yummy thinking food

Ive never read the manga, ive hardly watched the show. Im fandom built thru and thru!

Like the pic above, I use usuk as experiments to run all my ideas thru. Mix media,

World building, swatching, expressions and unfamiliar subjects. Theyre my go-to! since I started taking art seriously in 2021 and those events were mainly usuk themed

my styles always changing, and I'm usually using America and England to do it

Combined with writing and a poor conceptual understanding of base material (aka CANON) i have trouble knowing WHO alfred and england are, in my style. They're constantly changing designs make it hard for my writing to capture their characters consistently.

I get so fixated on solving my own inconsistent characterization writing. Its stupid! Im going to college across the country in ten days, for Christ's sake!

Its no use getting worked up over an inconsistent style- this IS the period of constant change, of constant growth and its great fun processing new interests through art, through two characters i am familiar with (even if i somehow don't know them at all)

Ive been reading stories about the royal navy: so i practice some made up naval uniform on england! That's just an example - i really do process new information through them, finding fun in research

Once i couldn't stop thinking about the scene below, about the intrigue of gore (a genre id never taken an interest to). And i was cringing about doing it to myself (about how ouchi it would be), but like all my creative ideas j filter them through characters - it feels safer that way. Then drawing myself in there. Yuck.

So i practice the idea in Alfred. "Oh ouch yup- looks just as gross and painful and I'd imagined. Perfect!!" Now ive got an Alfred doing this gross thing, now i have a headcanon about nations cleaning their tongues witn razors.

Now i wanna write about it. Haha its all a very self-feeding pattern.

Not sure if this rant makes much sense, but basically i STRUGGLE to establish characters. Partially because i play so much with them in my doodles with anything and everything i find interesting - perhaps it makes too many factors for one character.

#.txt #this literally... makes no sense im sk sorry if u read it TT #just a bunch of thoughts ive had #looking for advice ig #idk if this is a common issue but i can't imagine its THAT unusual??? ? TT plz?

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maudiemoods · 3 months

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Aight I feel like I should go ahead and officially say this! I probably won't be drawing much of sun and moon anymore! I'll still reblog art and fics of them but I will no longer be a creator! Just a consumer!

#i thought id be obsessed till the day i die #i do still love fnaf a whole bunch #i think ive just drawn everything i want to see for sun and moon? when i try to draw them it just feel repetitive??#guys watch me draw them as soon as i post this im gonna lose it #i just had the sudded urge to draw them #but for real thanks for everyone for following 🥹 especially the people who interact with my post #the past two years have been the online experience i had dreamed for! lots of support and interest in my art! means a lot to me #ren won't shut up #I'll probably occasionally draw them but I have new interests now ❤️#my life is a lime green jeep (that's a metaphor)

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melatien · 4 months

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tiny yoichi (unwillingly) lures out soldiers by being his helplessness little self so his brother can strike

#bases are the most reliable way to find food afo found!#yoichi is crying bcuz he pitys them <3 #not because hes nervous #im gonna be honest i made this idea up on the spot when drawing this #pewdiepies new art video awakened something in me I NEEDED TO REMIND MYSELF I CAN STIL DRAW BANGERS TOO #i didnt disappoint myself!!!! competitiveness is my enemy and my bestie literally #anyways his right eye was an absolute horrendous nightmare to draw it was going so well until i did the hair then it ruined the eye #i actually thought yoichi was wearing shoes at this age but then i looked back at those chapters and realised yoichi was shoeless #WITH ONLY A BANDAGE ON HIS FOOT??!?!!?!? agony #can yoichi not make me wish he had something good in life for ONE SECOND #think of this as like how he responded to afo killing those people that (presumably) beat yoichi up beforehand #we dont know if hes crying because his brother is killing or if he was crying before being 'saved'#ill try do some fluff art soon ive been really interested in body horror related art lately so i wanted to play around!!!#i have a BUNCH of ideas written down ive yet to do #i just keep doing whatever i feel like #i am the master of ignoring the instructions and winging it #mha #my art #yoichi shigaraki #one for all #my hero academia #first ofa user #shigaraki yoichi #mha yoichi #tiny yoichi #tiny yoichi in his shabby little clothes #ive actually been dying to draw tiny yoichi again but KIDS ARE SO HARD TO DRAW!!!!!#i had an art moment though #HALLEJUHAH #art gods had my back fr

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phlyaros · 3 months

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creating physical and digital media scratch WAY different itches its so unfair

#i have the urge to paint but i want actual paint but uh. i dont have any lol #i have a bunch of wax i COULD mold some for carving but i'd also need to makeshift a bunch of carving tools #not the worst thing to get up to but making tools ergonomic is annoying #ahhhh cest la vie #what i actually want is workable waxed yarn but beeswax is too hard to make it sticky i need uh paraffin wax for that.#making a 3d model out of yarn for donut makes drawing him wayyyy easier #ive thought about the viability of using the beeswax to 'set' waxed yarn sculptures but i worry it would melt the paraffin #make it undo itself #won't know until i remember to get some and try #i would still love to work with paint to be clear just. if i had to pick one lol #phlyaros' nonsense

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hantheheart · 2 months

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yknow what

i got some 4kota headcanons/thoughts

im gonna share em

Donny has the uncanny ability to make every single member of the Percy and Tristan Platoons to act their age. They'll be in the middle of doing something important and Donny will run over with a drink and yell "IM GONNA CHUG THIS, SOMEONE TIME ME!" and half the group are pulling out watches or something while the other half cheer and encourage him on and as soon as he's collapsed from not trying to breathe through that, they're back to serious mature mode. Percy often makes it much worse because he overestimates everyone else's limits and they're dumb teenagers, why would they pay attention to that. Meliodas has found them all in a heap before from trying some stupid thing Donny and Percy came up with in the middle of the night.

Lancelot and Anne are catty lil gossips. They talk mad shit all the time. Affectionately when its about their friends of course, but anyone else and they'll talk some life ruining shit up for the fun of it. They're Mean Girls TM and they definitely drag Tristan and Isolde into doing "spa nights" which is just them fuckin around with each other's hair and gossiping. Tristan is a closeted gossip, he feels bad about it but that boy can pin you like its nothing for the most inane, deep cutting things.

I definetly need someone to draw Anne putting a face mask on Lance while he talks shit about their friends or something. Tag me in that shit if you draw them being catty, i need that in my life

Thanks to his fairy heritage, Nasiens is just crazy good with plants and has a bunch he keeps in whatever place he stays in. He makes a point to learn what kind of smells his friends all like and find plants that smell like that. I don't know if perfume would be in his repertoire, but I can't imagine him not trying to make smelly things like that for his friends.

Jade gets on pretty well with Donny and the two of them tend to gravitate together when the groups convene. Something about being the "normal" guy of their respective platoons makes it easier for them to chat.

#can you tell ive only been watching the dub and had random things told to me through the internet #i do not care about spoilering shit for myself #nanatsu no taizai #4 knights of the apocalypse #mokushiroku no yonkishi #just a bunch of random thoughts #maybe some apply to the high school fic #4kota

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sualne · 4 months

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Question why does law have uh skin discoloration....? In the modern au?

it's permanent scarring from Amber Lead Syndrome! in the au i want to explore stuff like disability and chronic illness, he's got nerve damage in the discolorated skin, his hair also got white patches but he dyes it to make it less obvious he's got ALS because of the everything with flevance.

#maudern ask #this is partly cause im mad that he just magically recovered from it!! like i get it! but since its a modern au without magic i decided #this was a good opportunity to keep him sick. there's a lot of researches i need to keep on doing. it's a lot of fun. if anyone knows #idk threads or forums where ppl talks about their exp with: lead poisoning. transplants. chronic fatigue (got that but i want other ppl's #thoughts). arm amputee. chronic pain and many other id love to have a link 💪#since ALS is a fantasy illness i dont need to be accurate cause its not real but i still want it to be familiar/real enough to work so ive #being reading a bunch of things.#ive only got a chapters and a half done and a snippets/future scenes file thats huh. +15k words long. ok. need to work on chapter 2 #i had actually planned on doing so this weekend but i went insane over kingmaker instead ○|￣|_

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youredreamingofroo · 22 days

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everyday is another day of considering deleting 99% of the content I enjoy on my laptop just to play Sims 4 (a game that I would only use to worsen my OC-Obsessive sickness and also make silly sims)

#the amount of times ive laid in my bed and thought “i should get up and just delete a bunch of shit rn”-#-and had to stop myself from doing so was way too many times 😭#yapping

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phantastragoria · 9 months

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The tragedy that is the majority of viewers not catching onto the fact that Gamora had tons of internal cybernetics and an entirely replaced skeletal system when those are the only things that will remain long after she's gone.

#lex thoughts #universe: mcu #gotg thoughts #ive seen many people assume the silver markings were just. weird alien makeup and not the metal poking out of her skull #but granted i can't really blame them when the only mentions of the internal stuff being a quick aside during the briefing on Xandar #but. i still think about it and how it never really got brought up. almost as if it didn't matter because it was all mainly on the inside.#odd and offputting.#especially when it was always made a point to highlight the cruelty of involuntary body modification enacted on Nebula and (mainly) Rocket #bummer moment sorry i just can't get over vol 3 and watching everyone try to cover up her death as if it didn't happen #and that meaning they didn't go to Vormir so they'd be able to give her a funeral nor do they even seem very bothered by that.#very sad and depressing when yondu was allowed one and appearance beyond the grave multiple times but gamora..? Denied.#i also dislike OG Groot becoming nonexistent to the team post Vol 1 so i guess you could say the precedent had been set. but #even rocket buried a piece of him in that planter.#i wouldn't want to be a bunch of metal bones rattling around but i guess you don't always get a choice #and Gunn's tweet that he did think to include OG Groot and Yondu in Rocket's afterlife scene. but very specifically left out Gamora. sigh.

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jacksprostate · 3 months

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hey i was thinking about uploading a bunch of my snippets to ao3 for storage/ease of access since tumblr sucks. figured i'd ask yall your preferences before i spam the shit out of you

#im leaning towards all the same + every few days #id put f fc seperately regardless i think. not sure thats ready for ao3 yet #point blank #but yk the rest of it #obv downside to all one fic means it would be relatively untagged #but i dont tag my stuff in a very detailed manner anyway #idk! if u have more in depth thoughts for some reason feel free to comment #ive never had to navigate bringing over a bunch of 500-1500 word drabbles before #i might also separate out my more crackish little drabbles too. though tbh there may not be enough to bother. idk need to review #all of them will have few to no changes #just a quick beta for misspellings #my thought with the upload every few days is yeah it increases the spam (unfortunate) but it does feel a bit fun... nice little treat #both for myself and yall lmao

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matchandelure · 2 months

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i fear that the undercover top secret government assassins are growing on me (cp9)

#I HAD ZERO THOUGHTS ABOUT THEM AT FIRST #IN FACT I WAS DEVASTATED THAT THE WATER 7 QUARTET WERE ACTUALLY CP9 #BUT THEN??????? I READ CP9'S INDEPENDENT REPORT AND. I!?!??!?@?!?#the thoughts are endless ive been having one piece dreams every night for the past few days and they have all been cp9 related the brainrot #is so bad. i am sodgjkadhg #i love one piece there are so many characters with each new arc i get to i get some new characters to obsess over i love it i feel so alive #ive been fighting tooth and nail avoiding spoilers for the latest episode BUT GOD IM SO SO TEMPTED TO. TAKE A PEEK #anyways last night i was once again doing a wiki deep dive and i found some silly things on cp9's pages #JABRA AND LUCCI ARE THE SAME HEIGHT!!!!! THIS IS SO FUCKING FUNNY #CAN YOU IMAGINE?!?!?! the kid you've had beef with since he was 13 (maybe even earlier since lucci alreayd knew him when he was 6) who you #used to have a whole head over is now at eye level with you i would actually be so embarrased #KAKU IS FROM EAST BLUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS OS IMPORTANT ACTUALLY!! THE MOST IMPORATNT FACT EVER!!!!!!!!!!!#so he knows the strawhats are...also from the east blue right?!? right??????! and ik the wg steals these kids early on to train them so i #doubt he has lingering attachments to his home sea but i still think this so both so so sad and so important :'((#also not getting over how oda's depiction of tiny kaku has him holding a toy boat BC ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!?! ARE YOU K IDDING ME #kalifa and jabra's favourite dishes are both lamb based!!!!!!!!! silly because her animal motif is a sheep haha #BUT ALSO considering how her father was also cp9 and she's probably been conditioned since birth to also follow his footsteps and how jabra #holds seniority in the current lineup id like to think that these two have known each other a very long time and there were influences #the most dysfunctional fcked up family ever. cp9 #blueno and jabra are both from the north blue!!!!!!!!!!!!! and that one falshbakc we see that the two of them plus 6year old lucci trained #together but also it would be so fcked up if the two actually knew of each other before being roped into the governemnt #idk how the wg works do they just??? routinely scout around and pick up a bunch of kids ata time???? were jabra and blueno taken together??#also wondering if ... kalifa jabra and kumadori knew each other the longest as fellow agents or soemthing #i feel like im entertaining a gazillion thoughts all at once its so hard ot balance but we know both kalifa nad kumadori have #parents in the governemnt/assassin profession that also influenced them right #idk maybe one thing they can bond over #cp9 to me is just a fucked up family of some sort. they are not found family they are like some weird forged family where they were all #forced together and somehow made it work and they all love lucci and care for his wellbeing enough to raise all that money to get him to a #doctor and they cared about each other enough to get off enies lobby together without leaving anyone behind and they went cafe hopping and #shopping and bowling together and they all care for each other in their own way

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waitineedaname · 1 month

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apparently someone in my friend's program thinks I'm cute. this is doing insane things to my ego

#apparently they went up to my friend and were like 'i see you play board games every week with a bunch of lesbians'#and my friend was like. what.#and apparently by a bunch they just meant me specifically lmao #they were like 'that little blond one'#and they thought im cute :')#i told my friend to give them my number next time they see them but they apparently have a girlfriend akdbfkdhd #but this is amazing to hear #bc i dont think ive ever had this happen!#at least not to my knowledge #ive never had someone be like 'your friend is cute' referring to me #especially not in a queer way!!!! ah!!!!

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shadowedvales · 1 month

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so… in the additional media of stranger things (specifically the comics i’m mentioning), it was initially brenner’s idea/plan to kill off the other test subjects because they weren’t performing as well as eleven was. it was his best solution because that way, all the resources, time, and money could instead be placed only to her. and i just…. sure henry is a fine character and the massacre makes a lot of sense to me, but i think i am once again gonna change up my canon to actually fit this potential narrative instead.

i genuinely think the comic canon of the lab and brenner is far more intriguing than the show. everything with 9/9.5, ricky, and francine. eleven being the only one who grew up completely in the lab. those other kids were either volunteers, well into their teens, or had some semblance of a home life. eleven was the only one practically moulded from the womb. and they all had such a range of interesting powers. i firmly stand with the idea that jane is the only one who can contact the void.

brenner’s entire point of view on the lab subjects changed the second he found out terry was pregnant. he discovered he could steal this baby and make her his own. there would be no convincing the child because it’s all she would have ever known. because of this, i would not put it past a man like brenner to kill the other subjects for the sake of the “greater good” in this case, eleven.

eleven’s gifts just continue thriving beyond his wildest expectations. brenner would never dare assume that having moulded her from the womb, she would still be able to grow into her own person, her own mind, and one day be able to see him for exactly who he was.

back before season four aired, it was obvious there were other test subjects because jane was 011. so there were at least ten kids before her. but i always liked the idea/assumed that she was the last experiment because she was the most successful. that they didn’t need anyone after her because she was fulfilling everything they set out for her to do. with flying colours.

i just think the whole rainbow room idea, pitting the kids against each other thing… been there, done that. boring and predictable. i think at this point my portrayal of her time in hawkins lab really stems from the complete isolation she endured. where having the rainbow room, although eleven was obviously the most isolated out of the kids, brings that sense of community and sister/brotherhood. albeit extremely warped and toxic. knowing that she wasn’t alone in that experience just. doesn’t sit well with me. i think it’s important to note that she was alone, physically and mentally. which is why kali is also so important to her growth. i thought a lot of the flashbacks of her time in the lab during season four was really boring, repetitive, and just very predictable. although peter becoming vecna was a surprise to me, and was a nice little twist, the idea of her having an ally on the inside was really interesting.

maybe they did get as far as they do in canon, peter ballad was telling the truth about everything, about some of the workers there being prisoners like him, and he really wanted to get her out and to safety. but before they can escape through the pipes, they’re caught. peter is shot on the spot, and eleven is put into the isolation room for a few days as punishment. in this timeline, henry would be vecna, but henry would not be peter ballad.

when eleven turned seven, and was already showing extreme promise, where the other children were average at best, brenner had the eight children killed. kali had already escaped. this was the main cause for peter to gain eleven’s trust and try to get her out. because if brenner could murder his “children” in cold blood, there’s no way eleven was safe even in spite of her power.

when eleven is allowed out of the isolation room, her testing becomes more rigorous in attempt to distance and make her forget about what she attempted to do with peter. brenner begins gaslighting her, saying that there was never a peter, that she must have been dreaming. eleven does ask “papa” about “mama”, given peter told her of the day terry broke in the lab, but brenner is convincing enough to make eleven believe it was all in her head. say she is around eight years old, meaning the same timeline of season fours canon flashbacks.

i still do wanna keep the henry creel canon, and keep him as 001. brenner didn’t have him killed alongside the other test subjects, because who knows, one day he could become an even better asset than 011. brenner definitely wants to be able to control henry, but keeps the chip in him because, for the moment, doesn’t know how. killing him would be too big of a loss.

when eleven is ten years old, henry’s concealed powers break free and he manages to get the chip out himself, and unleashes hell onto hawkins lab. he almost kills brenner by snapping his bones, but eleven manages to stop him. her extreme abilities are unleashed, and she sends henry to the upside down. she does fall into a coma due to the extremity of the situation, but she does not forget what happened. brenner believes she’s the perfect weapon as she stepped in to save him without a second thought, was able to defeat henry, and opened a door to something he never thought possible. eleven is rewarded for her efforts. although she remembers the entire battle / confrontation, her memories regarding the portal are very hazy.

brenner decides not to focus on the portal straight away, instead gets her training harder and harder to see what else she can accomplish. also loved the idea of brenner sending her into the void to “look for him” so that will definitely be kept.

by the time she escapes and season one begins, her knowledge of the upside down is basically what we see in canon. because she passed out the moment after she sent henry away, she was once again gaslighted into believing she merely threw him through the glass and killed him. for two years she believed this, until making contact with the demogorgan, and those memories return completely.

due to her saving brenner’s life, (it was pure instinct. she happened to be there. saw her “papa” hurt and knew she had to make him better.) brenner constantly thanks her. but in a very condescending way. tells her: “you saved me so i can continue saving you.” aka, harness your abilities and see what else i can achieve from you. despite the fact that she saved his life, these words and phrases make her feel indebted to him. that she owes him something further.

i don't realistically see her thriving with her speech improvement until she's well into her twenties at least. her slowed development, sensory and social deprivation causes a serious delay in language. surrounded by other children she would have overheard conversations, some would have spoken to her. her conveniently forgetting her upbringing pre the battle with henry just isn't good enough for me anymore. it makes more sense for her to have been raised alone.

it also helps indicate why she gravitated towards the boys when they found her in the woods. they would have been the first people her age she ever remembered seeing. as far as she knew, during the lab there was no one like her. everyone was much older, they were adults-- although she stayed with benny, i'm not sure if she would have stuck around very long. where she followed the boys home without thought.

also it's important to note that after time, jane does understand that peter ballad was a real person, and was truly the first person (aside from terry) who wanted the best for her. when she remembers him, knows that brenner was lying, she deals with immense guilt regarding his death. he was shot right in front of her eyes, because he was trying to help her. this is another catalyst as to why after season two, jane never refers to brenner as papa. she does not give him that sort of credit.

#study‚ in my dreams it's all real and my heart has so much to reveal.#THINKING THOUGHTS. i have had this concept in mind for a while but i THINK i’ve fleshed it out properly now.#will write this up properly one day (never).#although henry offering eleven a place at his side wouldn’t be canon #he would definitely still look at her as an enemy for basically stopping his revenge.#AND the whole speech between he and jane never sat right with me.#saying brenner made him what he was / that it wasnt his fault etc. Like. No? henry was a sociopath. he killed his family.#brenner didn’t do anything to make him who he is. so jane always saw him for exactly what he was #and there’s absolutely no sympathy there.#and then regarding my season four canon as her regaining her powers by remembering the massacre/the fight. i am changing that to her #regaining her powers by simply confronting her past. understanding what she went through. finding ways to cope with it physically and #mentally. getting coping mechanisms from her therapist. seeking help. not needing to know WHY this happened to her (because there is not.#and will never be a reason.) but finding ways to accept it and move on. how to move on from eleven and become janessa ives.#also just because in this case henry doesn’t massacre a bunch of kids? It doesn’t make him any less evil. in this instance i am following #the idea that some of the workers were prisoners there in hawkins lab. and henry killed a bunch of the workers. so would definitely have #killed some innocent people.#just because i am separating peter from henry. does NOT mean i am excusing anything from henry/vecna.#in this case they are two completely different people. although i highkey wanna use jcb as peter because he just did the role SO WELL and #was SO BELIEVABLE i’m not sure about it yet. because i don’t want anyone to get the impression that i’m making excuses for henry.#BUT YES.#this be the new canon. <3 #idc brenner is such a good fuckin villain he’s disgusting but so intriguing.

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