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johnny-coxville · 1 year

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How about a really cute johnny and female reader (she's johnnys girlfriend but she doesn't do any of the stunts) fic where they're playing with the Super Mighty Glue for the third film and one of the other guys sticks the reader and Johnny together and he's really cute with it and finds it hilarious?

Figured I might as well mix the two aspects of the asks ;P

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Johnny x fem!reader fluff

♡

Too Close!

The glue that rested inside the wooden drawer was saved for a rainy day. That day. Was today. Johnny opened the blinds in the bedroom, squinting at the bright sunlight. The rain beat down on the window, giving cool air through the cracks.

He turned his head to you, where you slept softly. He made his way back over to the bed and sat down. Scratching your head, and brushing the hair out of your face. You slowly woke up, greeted by a soft kiss from Johnny. You smiled and kissed his lips. Laying your head back down on the pillow. You stretched your arms and yawned.

“Time to get up sweetheart, heading to Bam’s. It’s raining so you’re being dragged along to watch a stunt. I swear it’s harmless.” He said rubbing your shoulder. You sighed. “Alright. But if you get hurt I’m not driving you to the hospital this time.” You muttered. Of course, this was a bluff you always got so scared when he’d do such a dangerous stunt.

You two got up and dressed. Johnny slipped into his blue and white long-sleeve. Looping the belt through his black jeans. Tying his signature skull and crutches Converse. You took one of his flannels, sporting a black t-shirt underneath. Leaving it unbuttoned. You never bothered putting on a raincoat.

Finishing with your shoes, he slipped his jacket on. Grabbing the hotel keycard and sliding it into his jacket pocket. Passing you the car keys, you both headed into the heavy rain. Driving through PA wasn’t your favorite thing, but at least it wasn’t California traffic.

Johnny chatted the entire way there. Finally pulling into Bam’s driveway, multiple cars had already been pulled up. You were honestly nervous. You really weren’t interested in whatever house-destroying antics they were going to get up to.

Johnny reassured you, their plans wouldn’t be putting themselves in danger. You simply rolled your eyes and got prepared to run through the rain. Entering Bam’s parents, you shook yourself dry. Being greeted by April as usual.

She led you to the kitchen where the entire gang sat. You knew this would be trouble. All sitting at the table, like rowdy little children. They greeted you and Johnny. Sat on the table were a few containers of super glue. You looked at it unsure, looking over to Johnny.

Kosick stood leaning against the kitchen counter, camera mounted on his arm. Along with a few of the other film crew, just relaxing, waiting for the action to start. You were giving quite an unsure look. What were they going to do? Glue their lips to each other's assholes? See how far they could run with glue stuck to their feet? It had to have been something extremely outlandish.

¨Don’t look too excited for this Cons.” Dave giggled. You smiled. He always called you Cons because he could never remember your actual name. Converse were the only shoes you and Johnny ever wore, so the name stuck. “Not really. I mean. It’s probably a lot better than most of the things you’ve done.” You said pulling a chair at the table.

Bam took the initiative and stood at the foot of the table. “I say Johnny and Cons do something together! She’s never in our stunts. There’s no way we could hurt her with some super glue.” Bam said pointing at you. April facepalmed. She loved you dearly, and always talked you out of a stunt, no matter how small and stupid it was.

You nodded your head. “What are your plans.” You said caving. What’s the worse that could happen? “Alright, so you’re going to want to take your shirt o-” Before Bam could even finish Johnny cut him off with a flat no. Tremaine in the corner gave a suggestion. “Wee-man and Preston first. Just to see how it works out.” He said pointing to the two guys who uncomfortably shuffled. Sighing Preston got out of his seat.

Wee-man follows behind and stands with his arms folded. Never really fond of actually having to do a stunt. “Shirt off. Both of you” Tremaine said stepping closer with his smaller camera equipment. “Fucking seriously?” Preston scoffed.

He discarded his shirt, annoyed, and stood waiting for the next move. Wee-man reluctantly removed his shirt and stood face-palming. “Wait wait wait, I wanna do the glue!” You shouted. Tremaine shrugged his shoulders. “Works with me.” He said giving the go for filming. Everyone began to shuffle into place. Getting out of their chairs. The camera began to roll.

“Hello, I’m Johnny Knoxville! And this isss Super Mighty Glue!” He said reading the name off the glue bottle. You stood with an excited smile. “Here we have two very willing and lovely participants.” He said presenting Preston and Wee-man, with incredibly annoyed faces. You snickered taking over the bit.

“Alright, Preston you’re on the bottom, and wee-man you’re on top.” You said helping Preston slide onto the counter. The guys were already hysterical. Once Preston was on the table, you lathered his stomach full of glue. It smelled awful but surely felt even more often to feel on the skin. Wee-man was assisted onto the table, Bam shoving him backward while he was trying to balance.

“Bam!” April screamed, hitting him in the shoulder. Wee-man’s ass now glued to Preston's stomach. “Hold on! Hold on! I got this.” Johnny said pulling out a stun gun. Before he could even take a few steps Wee-man started to scream and fight, painfully ripping himself off of Preston's stomach. Preston screamed in pain pushing himself off the table. Both men jumping around and screaming.

“Someone fucking lather up Knoxville. This shit hurts!” Wee-man screamed out. Johnny wanting to prove some kind of point, maybe that he was tough, laid on the table, pulling his shirt off. “Lather me up, baby!” He said rubbing his hands together.

You squeezed two different bottles of glue onto his chest, cringing at the glue glopping and running down him. You crossed around the counter cautiously not to be stuck to Johnny in some stupid way. Just as you were ready to put the glue down, Dunn hauled you up by your shirt. You couldn’t fight his grip, being picked up like some kind of toddler by their onesie. He pressed you directly against Johnny’s bare sticky body. Johnny found this hysterical, you definitely did not.

“No fucking way! Get me off of him!” You shout. Everyone laughing except April. Johnny was nearly in tears by this point laughing, carefully trying to slide off the table. Every time you tried to pull yourself off of him, he’d squeal in pain. Your t-shirt was basically infused into his skin. Your flannel awkwardly stuck to the sides of his body where glue had seeped down.

Aww’s and laughter were spread throughout the room. You rested an angry face on his shoulder as he held you against his chest. “She’s reaallyyy stuck to me, man!” Johnny said showing you off to the camera. Flopping his body around trying to detach you. “Definitely going to have to cut her off of me..” Johnny said scratching his head. Glue stuck to his fingers getting caught up in his hair.

Looking into the camera he cringed. Ripping his fingers out of his hair, he pulled hair straight from his scalp. “Yep. I’m done! Can someone just. Set my shirt on top of her hand so she can change..” Knoxville asked.

April let out a heavy sigh. “I’ve got it.” She said leaving the kitchen. Coming back with one of her t-shirts for you to wear. You kept trying to kick at his knees, nearly having Johnny buckle over a few times. Giggling each time you made a poor attempt. “I’m going to glue your beard to someone’s pubes Dunn. I fucking swear on it.” You said as April wrapped the shirt around your neck for you to use shortly.

He giggled in the corner shaking his head. Johnny carried you around the house, holding you close. You felt like a baby strapped to his dad’s chest. Once you were nearly in the bathroom you could hear the other guys hollering. Assuming one of them had continued the bit.

He closed the bathroom door and shuffled himself to the counter to grab the scissors. You let out a heavy sigh. He giggled to himself, making eye contact from time to time. “I swear I could kill him PJ” You said pulling yourself slightly back to let him cut through the fabric. Thankfully these weren’t “good clothes”. You’d be fuming.

Once he had gotten the shirt undone, he just tore the flannel off. You finally were let go, sitting on the bathroom counter. You stared at his now extremely patchy chest, covered almost entirely in your shirt. You shrugged, sliding your new shirt on.

“Pugs! Not Drugs!” Johnny read your shirt. “That’s fucking great.” He sighed trying to relax his laughter. April always provided the best shirts. Another one to the collection. Once you had managed to clean the shirt pieces off Johnny, you both walked out to the kitchen. Dunn’s beard glued completely to the side of Bam’s face.

Idiots.

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bloatedandalone04 · 1 year

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Warnings : mentions of smut, swearing, kinks, jackass related topics

Goes from young Johnny to older Johnny (briefly) <3

Do not copy or repost anywhere.

❥︎First things first, hello age gap.

❥︎You meet when you’re 23 and he’s 30 (Jackass: The Movie era).

❥︎From the first look, man was in love.

❥︎Like full on, head over heels, in love.

❥︎Obsessed, even.

❥︎Physical touch is this mans love language.

❥︎With that being said, he’s rarely not touching you in some way.

❥︎Will always have a hand on you when he’s driving somewhere.

❥︎Head kisses (side, top, forehead) are an everyday occurrence.

❥︎You are literally never sad as this man is just so effortlessly funny, you laugh at every little thing he does.

❥︎Seriously, one time he dropped a can onto his foot and the way he looked so offended at a can had you nearly crying yourself into an early death.

❥︎Of course, he brings you with him to set for every Jackass film, just so he can show you off.

❥︎Even lets you do a few, yet mediocre, stunts that end up in the .5 films.

❥︎You’ve pretty much seen every injury ever and think of yourself as a self-taught nurse.

❥︎People who don’t know either of you would think that you’re both on something with the way you fool around with one another, especially in public.

❥︎This man will slow dance with you at every bar imaginable, just ‘cause he can.

❥︎His focus is 99% on you whenever you’re in the same room as him.

❥︎Jeff could be going over safety protocols and Johnny would have his eyes on you the entire time, sufficiently ignoring everything that’s being said.

❥︎Which usually ends up with Johnny hurting himself in the exact way he was warned about.

❥︎Anyway, mans a top for sure.

❥︎Also, dom af.

❥︎He is very experienced in bed, that much was obvious, and he only got better as he aged.

❥︎It’s a weekly, sometimes daily, occurrence, let’s be real.

❥︎Mans just can’t keep his hands off you.

❥︎Will literally go down on you at any given moment.

❥︎And man is he ever good at it.

❥︎Sex goes one of three ways, one; multiple orgasms from you, two; edging you until you’re literally crying, three; a one and done deal.

❥︎This man is far from vanilla, by the way.

❥︎He is so loud in bed, like seriously.

❥︎He also whimpers A LOT.

❥︎Absolutely WORSHIPS your body.

❥︎Hands; everywhere.

❥︎Clothes; discarded long ago.

❥︎Completely MELTS when you go down on him.

❥︎Very much whipped for you.

❥︎Pet names are a given.

❥︎Baby, babydoll, sweetheart, honey, doll - literally anything other than your name, really.

❥︎Will buy you flowers often.

❥︎Honestly, quite a chaotic couple.

❥︎But the vibes are there, for sure.

❥︎Y’all get married about three years into the relationship.

❥︎He just couldn’t wait any longer.

❥︎Now, fast forward to his Jackass Forever era and more specifically, when he embraces the silver and ditches the dye.

❥︎You never thought grey hair could be so attractive.

❥︎He’s still as in love with you as he was the day you met.

❥︎Still gives you flowers.

❥︎And he still fucks you with over another decade worth of more experience.

❥︎He just doesn’t last as long.

❥︎Overall, this man was yours from the second he saw you, and you were his.

#jackass 3d #jackass 2 #jackass 3 #Jackass 2.5 #jackass #jackass x reader #jackass imagines #johnny knoxville #johnny knoxville imagines #johnny knoxville x reader #johnny knoxville smut

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michelle-is-writing · 2 months

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Forgotten Dinner, Johnny Knoxville

Word Count: 1.7k~

Warning: Little bit of angst, forgotten anniversary, sexual themes mentioned

The food in front of me made me sick to my stomach, seeing all of it just sit there without having been touched. A couple hours of putting it all together and setting it up seemed like a waste now as I haven’t even taken a bite of it since I put it on the table. I wanted to wait for Johnny to get home, but even though he had told me he’d be sure to be at home by 6, I still find myself alone as the clock on the stove turns from 10 to 11 pm. Today isn’t our marriage anniversary, but it is the anniversary of the day we met, so I wanted to surprise Johnny with dinner and a new lingerie set I got. It doesn’t help that he’s not answering the phone either, and I’m starting to feel like it all of this was a waste now.

Choosing to head to bed instead of wait up any longer, I put all of the food away in the fridge and lazily toss the dirty dishes in the sink before heading out of the kitchen. Just as I reach the hallway, the sound of keys in the door stop me, leaving me to turn toward the front door and watch Johnny walk in. He wears a laughing grin on his face until he sees me by the hallway, still dressed in the velvet dress I picked out for tonight. At the same time, my eyes catch the butterfly bandages stripped across his eyebrow and the several bandages wrapped around his forearm.

“Hi, baby,” he says, an almost awestruck look currently on his face as he takes in my appearance. He certainly looks pleasantly surprised. “You look… fucking fantastic, what are you all dressed up for?” Hearing his words make me smile, but I still feel a small bit of heart ache at the reminder of the food I made and how much planning I put into tonight.

“Um, nothing anymore,” I almost mutter, reaching hand up to mess with the clip in my hair as I look to the carpeted floors. “You told me you were going to be home at 6, what happened?” I can’t help but ask him, crossing my arms in front of me as I swallow down the nauseous feeling in my throat.

“Jeff asked me if I could help film another skit with the guys, so I stayed to help them and kind of hurt myself,” he tells me, still lingering by the front door as he continues looking me up and down with that same facial expression. However this changes in a few moments as an almost scared look takes over him. “I… I think I forgot something important, what did I forget? What is today?” He asks, now closing the door as he begins racking his brain. Before he gets too far, I stop him and simply inform him by reminding him of today’s date.

“It’s the day we met,” I bitterly remind him, watching the color drain from him. My stomach somehow churns even more seeing the guilt take over his face. “You told me you’d be home at six, but it’s eleven now. I made dinner, it’s in the fridge. I think I’m just going to… go take a shower and go to bed,” I say, shaking my head lightly.

Just as I begin to turn to head up to our room, Johnny stops me. “What? I just got home, don’t you want to stay up for a little?” He asks, stepping into the middle of the living room. “Baby I’m so sorry I completely forgot today, please, I’d love to spend time with you.”

In any other moment, I would’ve smiled at the sweet words leaving his lips, but knowing he forgot that today was the day we met and that we had plans makes the smile stay away. “I think I’ve stayed up long enough,” I say to him, turning my face down to the floor again. “Goodnight, Johnny.”

Before he says anymore, I head up the stairs and into our room where I close our door and let my tears fall. He stayed back for the guys on the one night we discussed him being home on time. If only he could’ve done this any other night, then the issue wouldn't be as severe. There have been many nights in the past where Johnny has stayed late on set, but even then, he texted me on those nights to tell me - unlike tonight when he wouldn’t respond to any of my texts or calls.

After locking our bedroom door, I walk into our bathroom and stand in front of the counter. Staring into the mirror, I watch as my mascara slowly rolls down my face, causing me to wipe it away with a tissue. I really liked my makeup and outfit tonight, and I was really looking forward to Johnny seeing me dressed up tonight and how he might react. Although, I was anticipating how he would react to what I have on underneath my dress more.

With a small sigh, I throw the tissue in my hand away before sliding the straps of my dress down with the rest of the material following it. Looking back into the mirror, I run my hands down my lace clad hips and up to the straps of the matching lacy bra. As I adjust the straps to better hold it’s contents, I step back to look at myself in our mirror and smile. At least I like the way I look tonight. The set came with a waist band that connects to the underwear and it only helps to accentuate my waist and hips even more. I was hoping Johnny would enjoy it too.

A loud crash beside me scares me away from the sink and over to the bathroom window that is now open as Johnny clambers through it, putting his upper body through before almost throwing his legs in behind him. At the same time he does this, his head hits the corner of our bathtub, causing a groan to leave his lips as he crumbles on the floor and I rush toward him. Despite my questions over his head, Johnny barely pays attention to his own pain as his focus shifts to my lingerie clad body. “You were wearing that? For me?” He asks, still lying in the floor unmoving as if he were awestruck. “Baby, holy shit, when did you get this set?”

“Johnny, that’s not important!” I exclaim as I get on my knees beside him to observe his head. He didn’t crack it open, but that doesn’t mean he didn’t give himself yet another concussion. “You hit your head!”

“It’s not the first time, don’t worry please,” he reminds me, moving to sit up with a small smile. “I deserve it after making you wait for me all night dressed like this,” Johnny adds, looking me up and down with a sigh. “I’m so sorry, babe, after I got hurt, we sat around and iced all of our injuries. Not to mention, I broke my phone during the fall too,” he further explains, “I’m so, so sorry I forgot about tonight.”

After a few seconds, I sigh and brush the hair away from Johnny’s forehead where a goose egg is already forming. “I wouldn’t say you deserved to hit your head, specifically,” I tell him, “You’re not good at remembering dates, I know that; mostly because of the many times you have hit your head in the past,” My comment earns a guilty smile from Johnny as he turns to look away, knowing he can’t deny it. “But I do wish you would’ve been home earlier.”

“I should’ve been, and I am so sorry, baby,” he apologizes once more, closing his eyes before turning his head back to me. “You have no idea how sorry I am. I hate that I made you wait up, I hate that I’ve made you cry,” he adds, his eyes now open as he moves a hand up to brush against my previously tear stained face. “I’ll start being home by 6 every night, I’ll bring you flowers every week, I’ll let you tase me, whatever you want - please forgive me.”

His offers make me want to giggle, but I want to try and stay as serious as I can for right now. “I have a few ideas,” I tell him, taking his hands in mine before helping him stand up. He doesn’t wobble or anything, which is good; at least he doesn’t seem to have yet another brain injury to add to the long list of previous ones. For a few moments, Johnny looks me up and down like he did when he was on the floor, albeit this time, he doesn’t look so dopey. “Why don’t you start by helping me out of this?”

At my suggestion, he grins. “Of course, but babe,” Johnny starts, letting go of my hands to wrap one arm around my waist while he grabs my leg with his other hand. All the while, I brace myself on Johnny by holding onto his shoulders as he pulls me flush against him, my leg now curled around his hip with his arm keeping it secure there. “Tonight’s all about you, and I know it’s our anniversary but you deserve so much tonight,” he further tells me, sincerity deep in his voice. “I promise, I’ll try my hardest to make it up to you.”

After a few moments, I smile at Johnny. “I’ll hold you to that,” I tell him, earning a smile back from him. “I love you, Johnny, even when your bad memory gets the best of you,” I add, causing him to laugh before connecting our lips. At the same time, he takes his arm away from my waist to pick my other leg up and hold me, causing me to cling to him even more as he begins carrying me to our shared bed. Lying me down on it, Johnny breaks our kiss and pulls away to smile down at me.

“I love you too, baby,” he murmurs, staring at me with a hazed look in his eyes. That is, until a smirk makes its way onto his face. “Now, just relax,” Johnny tells me, his hands sliding underneath the lace of my bra as he perches himself between my legs. “And I’ll show you just how sorry I am.”

#johnny knoxville imagines #johnny knoxville imagine #johnny knoxville x fem!reader #johnny knoxville headcanons #johnny knoxville headcannons #johnny knoxville fluff #johnny knoxville fanfic #johnny knoxville fanfiction #johnny knoxville #johnny knoxville x reader #jackass x reader #jackass imagine #jackass imagines #jackass forever #jackass headcanons #jackass fanfiction #jackass

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ghostxpup · 1 year

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could you maybe do a story of everyone in the cky crew just chilling and having fun while you sit with bam and he’s being all sweet towards you and the others try and make fun of him.

love your writing <3333

Thank you so much 😭 I loved this request! (sorry the ending is ass) <3

Requests are always open

Me & You (Bam Margera x Reader)

It was a super rainy day in West Chester, so you and all of Bam’s friends were stuck inside for the day.

All his friends were currently being loud and running around the house, while you and bam were sitting on the couch next to each other smoking weed and giggling over dumb shit.

Bam is super flirty when he's high, so he suddenly moves you, so you're sitting on his lap “you're so cute babe” you heard him whisper in your ear, you giggle loudly and hit him in the chest lightly “shut up bam” his grip on your waist got tighter, and he's nuzzling his face into your neck.

Ryan and Dico come and sit right next to you, both smiling widely at you, and Bam.

“What do you two assholes want?” Bam said to them slightly glaring, “Oh, just wanted to see what you two lovers were up too” Ryan said loudly making everyone else come and sit around you and Bam. Bam sighed loudly and looked around, “Can you all go away? I’m trying to spend some time with my girlfriend” Bam said annoyed. You ended up moving, so you were sitting next to Bam as he started to throw pillows and whatever else he could find at his friends. Bam grabs your hand and pulls you to his bedroom, “let's get away from these assholes”.

You and Bam spent the rest of the day in his room playing video games.

#bam margera #viva la bam #cky #request open #jackass #bam margera x reader #bam margera imagine #jackass x readers #jackass x reader #fanfics #fluffy #jackass imagines #my writings

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omegasshyghuleh6661ghosts · 2 years

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Ryan Dunn x Fem Reader x Bam Margera Polyam Imagine Word Count: 4,181 Warnings: Alcohol, depression, angst, mentions of emotional/mental abuse, brief mention of suicidal ideation. Brief hinting at miscarriages, but it's not mentioned or addressed directly. ______________________________________________________________

Cigarette smoke, the smell of whiskey, beer, cinnamon and the faint smell of mint flooded your senses, a warm, gentle weight surrounding you as you began to wake up. Memories from the night before come back to you, your arms instinctively tightening around the pair draped across the curve of your stomach. Brandon's depression had hit hard lately and he finally opened up about it to you and Ryan.

You and Ryan had come home that afternoon from your doctor's appointment and impromptu lunch, expecting to see your blue eyed love up and excited to hear about how your appointment went. Instead, you were greeted with a half full bottle of Jack Daniels on the kitchen counter and silence.

"Go find him and get some cuddles, sugar, I know you need it."

You nodded and smiled softly, stretching upward a bit to kiss Ryan before walking upstairs to your room. The smile slipped from your lips as you opened the door, eyes taking in every detail of the sight before you. Bam was curled up in bed, blankets wrapped around him and a full glass of what you could safely guess was Jack in his hand. His eyes were bloodshot, cheeks tear stained, and lip bloody. He didn't seem to notice you take a step back, accidentally bumping into the taller of your loves. Ryan steadied you.

"Fuck…"

The word was muttered under his breath, hand resting on your hip as he took everything in. He didn't have to say a word, yet you knew exactly how he felt.

"Baby…"

Bam looked over to you, bringing the glass to his lips and taking a large swig before setting it on your bedside table.

"What?"

You moved to the bed, setting the sonogram pictures from your appointment down on the table before sitting beside him and wrapping your arms around him. No sooner had you done that, his body began to tremble slightly. Tears dripped over his cheeks as you let your head rest on his shoulder. Ryan sat in front of you both, worry etched across his face as he studied one of his closest friends.

"Bam, buddy… What's wrong? You seemed okay before we left--"

Ryan trailed off, eyes searching Brandon's face as the younger of the two shifted, wrapping you up in the blankets with him.

"I'm not okay… Haven't been for a while. My depression's back, and it's kinda kicking my ass."

Brandon's voice was far too quiet, drained and dull compared to his usual self. He sniffled, wiping his tears away with the back of his hand as you gave him a gentle squeeze.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"I don't want to, but I know I need to…"

Everything was quiet for a few moments as the younger man gathered his thoughts, you and Ryan sharing a look briefly. It broke your hearts to see Brandon this hurt, and both of you would be lying if you'd said that it didn't hurt that he kept this from you both. You shared everything with each other. Good, bad, ugly. All of it, without an ounce of judgement. Once he gathered his thoughts, the three of you talked everything out. None of you held anything back and by the time it was over, you were all curled up together. Brandon's tears had dried and you'd managed to lift his spirits, even if only slightly. Ryan and Bam had done most of the talking, which wasn't a surprise. You all shared the same love languages, words of affirmation and physical touch being the biggest ones.

"I'm gonna go get you something to eat, cutie."

You managed to wiggle out of the tangled mess of blankets and limbs, both men objecting to you leaving such a comfortable situation, especially since they knew it'd been a fairly stressful day for both you and Bam. You'd had a panic attack while waiting on the doctor, Bam holding you a little closer when you told him about it.

"You don't have to, honey. I promise I'm good."

Your brow raised slightly at Bam's words, grabbing his glass off the table.

"Honey, you haven't eaten today. Let me take care of you."

He nodded, knowing full well that you'd do whatever it took to take care of the men you loved along with your baby, and not a single thing was going to stop you. Ryan smiled as he reached up and ruffled Bam's hair before pulling him down for a quick kiss on the temple, causing the both of you to laugh before you walked out of the room and to the kitchen. You'd brought back lunch for Brandon, you and Ryan figuring he'd be hungry when you came home. You poured out the rest of his drink down the drain, rinsing the bottom of the sink and his glass before setting it down. You then grabbed the bag with his lunch from the fridge, setting it on the counter before going to a corner cabinet to grab a few snacks for the three of you. Reaching up in an attempt to grab a few small bags, you huffed out of frustration when you realized that the items you wanted were just out of reach. After a few moments of struggle you felt a familiar body press against you from behind, Bam's tattooed arm reaching up and grabbing the items you'd been trying to reach before setting them down on the countertop.

"Need some help, sweet little woman of mine?"

Oh.

A shiver ran down your spine at the last bit of his sentence, causing a chuckle to bubble up from his chest. He pressed a little closer, head dipping down toward your shoulder as he trailed a hand up, letting his arm wrap around you after a moment.

"You know, sweet girl, you have no idea how much I want you… How much I always want you."

You smiled at the memory, now fully awake. You carefully moved your lovers' arms as you stretched, opening your eyes before relaxing a bit and getting out of bed. Your hand rubbed over your stomach as you made your way to the kitchen, making a pot of coffee for your boys and grabbing some things for breakfast. You stopped for a few minutes, kicking on the TV for some white noise. After settling on french toast and omelettes you went back to making breakfast for you and your boys, getting lost in thought after a bit. Subtly muscular arms wrapped around you a short time later, easing you back to reality as someone let their head rest on your shoulder. The faint smell of whiskey and mint filled your senses after a moment along with an indescribable scent that never failed to make you smile and calm you down. You relaxed into the embrace, soft lips pressing a kiss to your neck.

"You're so intoxicating to me."

Bam's words were quiet, your head tilting slightly to rub against his for a moment. Another kiss to your neck, one hand on your hip, the other resting comfortably resting on your stomach.

"Morning, baby. Did you sleep well?"

He smiled, moving his head to press a kiss behind your ear.

"Always do when you're around, sugar. How'd you sleep?"

You smiled, letting a hand rest on top of one of his.

"Can't say it was bad. Slept with two smoking hot guys last night, woke up and they were still there. Figured the least I could do was make 'em breakfast."

He let you go, laughing as he moved to your side and began to help you with the food.

"Sounds like they're two lucky guys then, getting a girl like you."

You couldn't help but laugh at that, looking up at your blue eyed love. He smiled, raising his brows slightly.

"Am I wrong, sweetness?"

"No. Though I've gotta say, I think I'm luckier."

"Who's luckier?"

You and Bam looked up, Ryan walking to the kitchen island and sitting down in front of you both.

"I am."

Both your head and Brandon's turned toward each other, having spoken at the same time. Out of the corner of your eye you saw Ryan shake his head, smiling at the two of you.

"Neither of you are luckier, dorks."

"I'm not so sure about that…"

Ryan raised a brow, his blue-gray eyes gleaming slightly as he smirked.

"You gonna argue with me about it, little Mama?"

You contemplated mouthing off to the taller man, shaking your head before pouring him a cup of coffee and handing it to him.

"Nah, I'd rather let Preston fall on me from twenty feet up."

The three of you talked and joked around for a few minutes before getting your plates ready and enjoying breakfast. After eating and cleaning up, Bam stretched out on the couch.

"I meant it when I said I thought I was luckier, y'know…"

You looked to Brandon from your spot on Ryan's lap, raising a brow slightly.

"Alright, I'll humor you. Why do you think you're luckier, honey?"

"Because I've got you two. Nobody's ever really loved me like you do… When we first met, I had given up, but you came into my life and I brought myself back. You both have spent years with me, just fucking loving me for me. You make sure I'm okay, unknowingly give me so many reasons to keep on living, inspire me day in and day out… You pick me up when I'm down, help me with a lot of shit most people would give up on… You two are my fuckin' world. Whenever we're together, I feel at home. I feel like I'm safe, and like everything's finally gonna be okay. Nobody else gives me that feeling, and I crave it. I crave you, us… All of it. I need you like I need to breathe, and I'm so fucking sorry about yesterday."

His words tugged at your heart, Dunn giving you a gentle squeeze as you sniffled in an attempt to fight the tears that began to form in your eyes.

"Brandon Cole Margera, don't you dare apologize for that. You're gonna make me cry."

You'd managed to get the words out, moving to get up to go comfort your love when there was a knock at the door. The three of you looked between each other, questioning which of you would get it.

"I've got it, cuties. You two relax, alright?"

Leave it to Dunn to take control, wanting to take care of (and more often than not, spoil) you and Brandon.

"Yes, Daddy."

"Sir, yes Sir!"

You and Bam broke out into a fit of giggles at the other's sarcasm as you got up and moved to the couch, glad you'd chosen to wear one of Dunn's massive hoodies this morning. Brandon's arms reached out for you, a goofy smile showing on his lips as you curled up on the couch with him.

"C'mere, cuteness."

He gently pulled you close, burying his face in your neck for a moment.

"Y'know… I wouldn't be here, or be who I am, without you two either."

Your words were just loud enough for him to hear, his bright blue eyes meeting yours as he looked up at you knowingly. He pulled you into a deep kiss as you heard your friends' telltale laughter, both you and Bam glad you'd opted to sit up as you broke the kiss after a few moments and moved a bit closer to him to make room for whoever was about to come crashing onto the couch. The door closed, Knoxville and Pontius wandering into your living room before flopping down onto the couch on either side of you. Steve, Ehren, Jason and Ryan walking in a few moments later. Ryan chose to sit on the floor in front of you two, passing it off as just wanting to leave other seating options open for everyone else.

"I'm surprised any of you are over this early. I mean, hell… It can't be later than seven, maybe seven fifteen? What's the deal?"

"We're going on a road trip, no ands, ifs… Probably some butts."

You couldn't help but shake your head and smile at Steve's words, Johnny chuckling.

"That's a hell of a way to put it, Steve."

"We've got a few days off from filming, and wanted to take everyone to this kickass waterpark, amusement park thing. It'd be good for us."

You fought off the nerves that'd popped up in your chest, glancing to Ryan before looking at all of your friends.

"I'm in if the rest of you fuckers are."

"I'm going if she's going."

"Good, because we've already got a van ready and we weren't really gonna give you an option. Now go pack. You've got a couple days of triple r to enjoy. Rest, relaxation, and rowdiness."

Bam rubbed a hand over your arm, feeling how you'd unintentionally tensed as Ryan stood up and made his way to your room to pack for you both. The rest of the group fell into small conversations of their own, talking about what they wanted to do at the park, where we were gonna stay, and other random things. You gave Bam's hand a gentle squeeze, trying your best to relax as you tried to figure out how you'd handle the trip. Neither you, Bam or Ryan had said a word to any of the crew about your relationship, though you could safely guess there'd been at least one conversation between the rest of the men to take bets on who you were actually with. Knoxville draped an arm on the back of the couch as he leaned over toward you and turned his face toward yours.

"You're too quiet, gingersnap. What's up?"

You playfully nudged him at the nickname, a shortened version of the 'Spicy little gingersnap cookie' he'd called you when you first met. His coffee colored eyes hadn't dropped their gaze from you, both of you knowing full well that there wasn't much you could hide about your mood.

"Just thinking, PJ, that's all."

He raised a brow, opting to not push it right now. His attention was pulled to Pontius a moment or two later after the other man had asked why Johnny'd called you gingersnap. The older man explained that it was because when you met, your hair had been dyed red, you were considerably smaller in stature than everyone else, and you were feisty as hell.

"Hey short stuff, c'mere! I need your help really quick."

Both you and Jason instinctively got up, the group laughing as you looked at each other, brow raised.

"You gotta specify, man."

"Which of you do I call baby?"

You'd started to walk to your room stopping for a moment when you noticed Bam stand up, the group bursting into a fit of laughter again as you shook your head and finished the walk up.

"What'd you need, baby?"

"Wanted to make sure you were alright, plus I can't find Bam's trunks anywhere."

You smiled genuinely at the taller man, kissing him for a moment before moving to your dresser and rummaging through a drawer before pulling out two pairs of swim trunks that had somehow gotten mixed in with your swimsuits. You tossed them onto the bed, closing the drawer and leaning against the smooth wood surface. Taking a moment to get your thoughts in order, you made a mental effort to keep yourself quiet.

"I'm just… I dunno. I'm probably overthinking shit again, honestly. I can't really do much at a waterpark at the moment--"

He looked back at you as you gestured to your concealed bump, shaking his head.

"And PJ knows something's off with me."

"Baby, you can still have fun at the park. We've just gotta be physically careful, that's all."

He stopped packing for a minute, joining you and pressing a kiss to the top of your head as his arms wrapped around your waist. You relaxed into the embrace, closing your eyes for a few moments as you gripped his shirt.

"I don't want to hide anymore. It's not fair… To you, Brandon, me… Our baby…"

You opened your eyes as he pulled back from you for a moment, his eyes studying you intently.

"Then let's not hide anymore, sweetheart. I love you, Bam, and our little baby. It's not like we've made a huge effort to hide this lately anyway. Besides, I'll bet anything that most of them already know, if not everyone. They're probably just waiting on us to say something."

You nodded, the taller man pressing a kiss to your temple before letting you go. You'd calmed down a bit while helping him pack, holding his hand as you walked back to the living room after a few minutes. He set the suitcase and duffel bag down behind the couch, Bam looking back at you both and smiling.

"All good?"

"All good."

A few hours later you were well into the trip and stretched out in the back, your back facing the rest of the group as you let your head rest on Ryan's lap, legs stretched out over Bam's. Your eyes had been closed for a little while though you were still very awake, trying your best to avoid motion sickness. Most of the group had been joking around with each other, the topic of conversation changing for one reason or another.

"How long have you guys been together?"

You could almost guarantee that your loves shared a look, Bam finally breaking the silence.

"Fuck… Eight years at this point, right?"

You could hear the smile in his voice, Ryan laughing.

"Eight and a half, almost nine. We got together at the end of Sophomore year, beginning of Junior."

"Damn, that long already… Doesn't really feel like it's been that long, Ry."

"That long already? Why'd you hide it for so long?"

"None of us honestly wanted to bring it up until we were comfortable. We got shit for it the entire time we were together in high school, and just said fuck it basically. We're together, we're happy, we've got our shit together for the most part. It's not really anyone's business except ours."

"Yeah. Especially during high school."

You heard the pause in Bam's voice, knowing what he was about to bring up and subtly moving your arm to rub Ryan's hip before giving him three tiny taps against his skin. 'I love you.' Without a moment of hesitation, he mirrored the action on your back.

"I mean, shit… Outside of school, her family was the fucking worst when it came to us. They gave her so much shit for being with us, and kicked her out because of it. We split her stuff between our houses, and she kinda moved in with both of us until we got a place of our own. Ape loved it because there was finally another girl in the house, so she got to spoil her, be all Mama Bear, and do all the girly shit that moms do."

Ryan laughed, more than likely remembering something April had told him during the beginning of your relationship.

"I think the only thing she really hated about that time was how often she'd see this little spitfire covered in hickeys and freak out because she thought she'd gotten into a fight, or we hit her or somethin'."

"We'd never dream of giving you guys shit for being together. You're happy, and that's what fucking matters."

A smile formed on your lips at Knoxville's words, the others piping up in agreement.

"She thought I got the shit beat outta me by the assholes who kicked me out the first time, fight the second time, thought one of you dorks accidentally hit me on a couple of occasions. She kinda left it alone after she accidentally heard some x rated noises one night."

You finally spoke up, the group laughing at the story as you turned over carefully to look up at your loves and get more comfortable. The three of you ended up spending the rest of the ride telling your friends stories from your many years of dating, after you'd elaborated on what made April stop worrying about your hickeys. After a few more miles, you all pulled into a rest stop to stretch and do whatever else the group needed to do. You sat up as Pontius parked the van, the other guys getting out of the van pretty quickly before Bam got out and helped you out as well. Ryan stayed behind you, tucking a hand into your back pocket as he closed the door behind him.

"You know… I know you had your reasons, but you didn't have to hide. We'd kick anyone's ass for fucking with any of you, and you know it."

You smiled as Chris walked away after ruffling your hair, moving to slip out of Ryan's hoodie. He stopped you for a moment, laughing when you explained that you had one of Bam's CKY tank tops underneath. You slipped out of the oversized material, tying the arms around your waist before leaning against the van.

"Hey sweet girl, I'm gonna go grab a drink from the vending machine and make sure no one's doing anything potentially dangerous. Want anything?"

I shook my head, tilting my head slightly as Ryan leaned down to kiss my cheek before removing his hand from my pocket and walking to the main building of the center. You looked to Brandon, catching him getting lost in thought.

"What're you thinking about?"

"Huh? Just still thinking about yesterday, I guess."

"Honey… Stop worrying about it."

He moved to stand in front of you, his bright blue eyes studying yours as his hands came to rest on your hips. You knew him well enough by now to know that he was going to apologize for it, or bring up something he'd said yesterday, so you cut him off for a moment.

"Just listen to me for a minute, alright? I would never let anyone hurt the ones I care about, and that includes you."

You paused for a moment, completely focused on him as you reached a hand up and rubbed a thumb over his cheek.

"Both you and Dunn told me that each time I spiraled because of something we went through. I mean it now. We both do."

He nodded, you stretching up after a moment to rest your forehead against his.

"You of all people know that I went through the same shit when we first got together. You and Ry were there holding me when I got blackout drunk and wanted to end myself after I got kicked out, disowned, and told that I didn't deserve to live by my quote unquote family."

Another pause, the memories flooding back for a moment before you pushed them aside.

"Who held me together the handful of times I got beyond blackout drunk each time my depression came back with a vengeance because of what happened in '97?"

He gave you a gentle squeeze, neither of you having to mention the events for you both to know what you were talking about.

"Me and Ry."

"You and Ry. Do you really think we'd be mad at you for doing the same thing because it seemed like it was the logical thing to do at the time? 'Cause we aren't. We're gonna help you deal with the shit up here in this wonderful, crazy brain of yours, and we're gonna try our damnedest to make sure it doesn't happen again. You got me?"

"Yeah… I've got you, and I'm gonna try. We're gonna try."

He smiled softly, leaning down a bit to kiss you. Your eyes closed as you mirrored his actions, the fingers of your free hand finding their hold on the belt loop of his jeans. His right hand moved up from your hip to the swell of your stomach, rubbing a thumb over it before breaking the kiss a few moments later.

"I love you, sweetheart, so fucking much."

"I love you too, baby. To the moon and back."

"Thank you… For staying with me through everything. I don't know what the hell I'd do without you, or without Dunn."

You moved your hand up from his cheek, ruffling his hair as you opened your eyes. He smiled genuinely, moving back a little bit to get a better look at you.

"You don't have to thank me, Bam. I'd do anything for you, and we both know Ryan would do the same."

He nodded, visibly more relaxed than he'd been in a while. Ryan walked up, pressing kisses to both of your foreheads.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah. Needed to talk some stuff about yesterday, but we're all good now."

Brandon's words brought a small smile to your lips as you both relaxed and managed to joke around until your friends got back to continue on with the trip.

#Ryan Dunn imagine #Bam Margera imagine #Ryan Dunn x Fem Reader x Bam Margera #Jackass Imagines #To be continued maybe?

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yyyeahduuude · 2 years

Text

Jackass & Co Headcanons: What Song(s) They Would Put on a Mixtape for You || Part 1

Bam Margera:

Dave England:

Ryan Dunn:

#jackass #Ryan Dunn #Bam Margera #Dave England #Headcanons #Jackass imagines #jackass fic #jackass x reader #Spotify

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punkdooley · 2 years

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maybe a dico kmart fic?

Ooh I have a specific memory from the old Kmart that they tore down by my house, I can definitely use that as a piece of inspo.

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m4rgera · 2 years

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i need more poopies😫🤲😫🤲

ok but like imagine the first time sean met you on the set, and he knew right away that he thought you were cute as fuck. like literally love at first sight. he would get all flustered around you during filming (even if you were just a crew member.) like they would have to reshoot so many stunts cuz that mf was zoning out. never did a good job at hiding it either, from day one it was pretty obvious to you. you were the one to make the first move just cuz he was so scared??? shy???? you know what i mean.

#jackass #johnny knoxville #dave england #chris pontius #ryan dunn #bam margera #ehren mcghehey #danger ehren #steve o #jackass forever #jackass imagines #jackass headcannons

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dunnswrld · 2 years

Note

johnny fucking you so good that you start to get tears in your eyes so johnny just keeps talking to her whilst fucking her, telling her how good she is?

i said it once and ill say it again i love my dirty anons.

nsfw/smut! fem!reader, dacryphilia, praise!

it had been such a long four weeks without johnny by your side. he had went to shoot with steve-o and chris for wildboyz in god knows where. but now that he was finally face-to-face with you again it didn’t take long for things to get rather heated. you two were all over each other before you even managed to open the front door to your guys shared home.

which is why your face was now pressed into your soft pillow on your bed as your back was arched. you could feel the firm grip of johnnys hands on your hips as he pushed your hips into his while he also drove his hips into yours.

it really showed how much johnny missed you with the way he was fucking you, rough but so loving and gentle at the same time. from him holding your hand, placing gentle kisses along your spine, or the many sweet words that fell from his lips.

“i missed you so much sweetheart, thought about you every second of every day.”

“god you feel so good- never leaving you for that long again doll, don’t think i could manage.”

“you fuck me so good sweetheart- fuck- miss ya so much.”

everything was making your head spin in pleasure, it was almost overwhelming how good johnny was able to make you feel right now.

your head was so fuzzy from the pleasure to the point where you didn’t even feel your nose begin to feel prickly and your eyes welled up with tears. you were too focused on the way johnny was slamming his hips into yours, the lewd noise of skin slapping and your own broken cries filled your ears as hot tears rolled down your cheeks and onto the soft pillow on the bed.

johnny was also too caught up in his own pleasure to realize his girlfriend was crying, the feeling of him being inside her and touching her once again was so distracting in every way possible. he was almost melting at the feeling and the pretty noises that were falling from your mouth- he wishes he could listen to them on loop for the reat of his life.

but what pulled him out of the trance you had him in was a large sniffle. he stopped his movements so fast after hearing your sniffle his hips sputtered. concern washed over him as he realized he may have been too rough with you-

“hey, hey, sweetheart are you crying? am i being too rough? im so sorry-“

but when johnny was going to finish his sentence he felt your hips begin to grind on his dick, a soft moan falling from his lips as the grip on your hips tightened.

johnny was taken aback at first, unsure of what to do since tears kept falling from your eyes onto your pillow but your hips seemed to grinded against his in such a needy manner.

“feels s-so good johnny. please keep going and don’t stop- please.”

your begging was all johnny needed to finally start slapping his hips into yours again, the same lewd-skin slapping noise filling your guys bedroom again.

johnny thought before that the sex you two were having before this moment was amazing, but now after he realizes he was making his sweet girlfriend feel so good to the point where it brought her to tears he know thought that this was the best sex he’s ever had.

as johnny watched himself slip in and out of you at a fast pace various loud groans fell from his lips.

“by the time we’re done- holy shit- you’re gonna have that pillow soaked in your tears sweetheart from how good im about to make you feel.”

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johnny-coxville · 1 year

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I was thinking maybe for a really smutty Johnny fic. The reader asks Johnny if he wants to try something new, she’s wants to see if he’ll cum inside her as they’ve never done that, Johnny gets super excited and super into it. With some dirty praise along the way and goofy excitement from knox ?

I'm sorry it's a bit short and not exactly on promt, but I'll gladly remaster it as soon as I'm free! Hope you enjoy it. :)

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

At Last.

Johnny Knoxville x fem!reader nsfw

Time in bed with Johnny was never a bore. He always found something new to task you with. Position, praise, you name it. He made you feel good in everything he did. This time was entirely different.

You sat across from him at the wooden dinner table. A cute tablecloth laid across the table complimenting the decorations of your apartment. Johnny fiddled with the bottom of the cloth as he ate. Looking up at you every now and then to smile.

Once you were nearly finished with your plate, you paused. Taking a long gaze at him. He paused as well, his chewing put on hold. “What’s the matter?” He questioned with a mouthful of food. You grinned. “Nothing. I was just thinking about something.” You said twirling your fork around the plate.

He swallowed his food and cocked an eyebrow. “Anddd that iss?” He said with a side smile. You blushed with a small giggle. “Nothing!” You said teasing. Standing up from the table, emptying the rest of your leftover pasta into a pot. Heading to the sink to wash your dish. Johnny scooted out of his chair and followed.

He dropped his food into the pot and sat his plate on the counter. You ran the water for a moment, squirting the soap onto the sponge. Behind you, he wrapped his arms around your waist. Kissing your neck and exposed shoulders.

You leaned into his touch, scrubbing the plate in front of you. You pressed your ass out, pushing it against his crotch. “Is this what you wanted to tell me?” He said pressing himself closer. You shook your head. “Johnny.” You said softly. You purposely drew out the situation just for the thrill. “I want you to cum in me.” You said nearly silent.

His movements were still a second. “Wait… Really? He said with almost a giggle. Like a child being told they were allowed to have a puppy. “Yes, Johnny.” You said setting the cleaned plates on the drying rack and twisting the sink off.

Mere seconds passing, he spun you around. Shoving your back against the ledge of the sink. Dipping down to your face to kiss you. His hands gripping onto your waist. You kissed him back, bringing your hands up to caress your face.

You pulled back with a small. “Calm down killer. You’re hurting my back on the sink.” You said giggling. He chuckled and stepped back. Letting you adjust your back. “If I had known I would’ve worn my cute g-string!” Johnny joked.

You sneered. “I’ll pass on that one.” You said walking towards the bedroom. You could feel the excitement radiating off of him. He had been waiting for this moment for months. Johnny entered the room behind you, shutting the door. You turned towards him and backed away slowly.

Your legs hit the front of the bed. He approached, pulling the shirt off of your body. He smiled wide. A smile that was almost always plastered across his face. You reached out and pulled off his own. Revealing his toned chest. He backed away a couple feet.

“Let’s not waste time honey. I know exactly what I want, and went I want it. I want you. Now. Get those clothes off.” He said beginning to unbutton his pants. He sent shivers down your body. You did what he said, and wasted no time. Sliding down your jeans, and slipping down your underwear. Looking up, all that he was left in was his boxers.

He grabbed your waist, pulling you close to his warm body. Resting his forehead against your own. He was significantly taller than you, his head tilting down to you. He shifted his face and began to kiss you. Immediately entering your mouth with his tongue. You explored each other’s body’s like you always did.

Though the interactions were more aggressive- more- yearning. You couldn’t wait any longer. You tugged his boxers down, and he took this as an invitation to remove your shirt and bra. Both of you struggled to shimmy off your articles of clothing but now left skin to skin. The warmth of your body’s burning each other.

You two backed against the bed, hitting the edge. He smiled and gently laid you against the made sheets. Soft against your bare back. The smiles shared between you two were genuine, and full of anticipation. He inched his way on top of you finding a comfortable position.

You knew he would start out gentle, inevitably leaving you a sore mess. He clicked his tongue and grabbed a pillow from behind you. Making sure both your head and lower back was supported.

Kneeling down into you he traced his fingers around your curves. He slowly pushed himself inside. A brand new sensation you had never experienced before. Thankfully with the grown anticipation, you were unbelievably soaked. Making his entry smooth.

His mouth just barely agape as he fully entered. “Wow.” was all he could mutter. You snickered at the dorky look on his face. Though admittedly just feeling him inside of you, entirely bare, was enough to make you howl.

His arms caged around your sides as he was inches away from your face. His warm breath tickling your nose. He began to pump. A slow pace for a start, but he was never patient.

As he picked up on his pace, your eyes were locked with his. Trying your best not to change expression. Johnny pushed himself deep and hard. Grunting every now and then when he changed pace. “Does it feel good sweetie?’ He whispered, a smile still wide across his face.

You nodded your head in response, hoping for something more. Noticing your lack of expression, he pulled out of you. He took your left breast into his mouth, and your right was graced with his twiddling fingers. Switching breasts he sucked and licked you in contentment.

He pulled away from you, standing up. He grabbed at his aching cock, and gave it a pump. Biting down on his lip as he admired your body.

He reached a hand out for you to grab, not saying anything. Giving a confused look you took his help and stood off the bed. He let go of your hand and stepped away from the foot of the bed. “You’re really going to feel it now. Get on that bed and arch for Johnny.” He said stepping over to you, giving you a firm smack.

You couldn’t help but giggle, and by that point, Johnny completely lost his composure. Letting out a hardy laugh. “I can’t take this so seriously! But god you’re fucking sexy.” He said rubbing his hands together in a silly manner.

You rolled your eyes and made your way back onto the bed. You got down on your hands and knees and arched your back as far as it would give. Pressing your face into the pillow. “Thatt’s it.” He said pressing his knee’s into the bed.

As you felt the weight shift, the anticipation that was long growing in you was ready to burst. He grabbed at your waist and shifted you until you were lined up with him. He was a lot larger than you, making for easy access to his favorite parts of you. He pressed inside of you rubbing your sides.

Though this time he wasn’t going to be gentle, nor slow. He slammed in and out. Scraping his nails along your figure. Pressing his head against your side. He rocked your body into him as he kept his pace. You screamed in pleasure, soaking the pillow you rested your face on.

For the first time you had heard Johnny moaning and howling almost as loud as you. “I’ve been waiting for this moment for so fucking long.” He said grasping for your hanging breasts. Squeezing one with one hand, using the other to press bruises into your side.

"I've never felt you so soaked. You really wanted this huh? I bet you've wanted to feel my bare dick sooo fucking bad." He said with a strained laugh.

You grunted in response. Finding it hard to hang onto your breath. "I'm going to make sure you're fucking dripping with my cum baby." He said squeezing you harder.

Neither of you lasted very long. Screaming each other's names, almost drowning out the wet sounds of you both. As he nearly came to his edge, he bit into your shoulder. Making you cry out in painful pleasure.

“I’m going to fucking cum..” He grunted, pressing himself as deep as he could. As he hit your sweet spot, you thrashed in pleasure. Needing to be held still as you screamed. You could feel his hot cum filling you, a strong pressure making you feel even more full.

He didn’t stop until you were overfull. Pulling out you leaked cum. Your ass was covered in handprints, and your pussy was swollen. Though it was the most satisfaction you had ever felt. “I’m so glad I had been saving that. If I had any idea you were planning this I would’ve made it much more special.” Johnny said heading into the closet for a towel. “Rammed you harder than any bull that’s ever rammed me.” Johnny giggled. You sighed with a laugh. Relaxing your back, and laying on your stomach. Your body throbbed, but god. It was so worth it.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

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bloatedandalone04 · 1 year

Text

➪the one where you’re bam’s sister and become pregnant with johnny’s baby. (requested)

Warnings: jackass related topics, swearing, bam being bam, pregnancy, brother bam, fluff, angst, age gap (reader is 24, johnny is 33 - not really mentioned)

Word Count: 4.1k

Do not repost this anywhere.

To say you were the happiest you had been in a long time would be a massive understatement.

You were beyond happy, ecstatic, even.

However, there was a downside to your happiness.

While you were the happiest you’ve ever been, your brother, Bam, was the most pissed off he’s ever been. And it was half your fault and half Johnny’s.

Bam didn’t know what to expect when he offered you the option to tag along with him one day when he was filming the first Jackass movie. He thought that you’d find the experience boring, traumatic, even, and was sure that you’d skip out on the next time he asked if you wanted to come with him to the set again.

The number one thing he never expected was for one of his castmates to fall in love with you - and he didn’t expect you to feel the same way Johnny fucking Knoxville felt about you.

It was cruel, really. The one time he decided to be a good brother and involve you in the craze that was his job, you start a relationship with one of his best friends.

You weren’t all to blame, though. Bam had spoken about you to Johnny countless of times, describing you as his pretty, too kind for her own good, sister who had no business getting swept up in the drama that comes with being a ‘celebrity’. He wanted to protect you from all that, shield you from the harsh reality that was his world.

But, the second someone found out about Bam Margera’s little sister being involved with Johnny Knoxville, you were outed to the whole world. And gone was your privacy.

While Johnny tried to keep it a private relationship, keeping his interactions with you in public as minimal and friendly as possible, he had no control over the swarm of articles that he woke up to one morning, his arm sore from having you lay on it all night.

At his sudden tenseness, you questioned what was wrong, only to find out that your private relationship was now public, and it was all anyone could talk about.

You wanted to be mad, but it was now officially out that Johnny Knoxville was taken and off the market. How could you be mad when it was you who he had chosen to settle down with?

Sure, you felt bad that Bam wasn’t happy with the relationship. You had always seeked his approval for your past boyfriends, none of which he cared for, and you thought that since he not only cared for Johnny, but knew him as well, he would accept your relationship almost as soon as it formed.

But you were wrong.

It was nearing five in the afternoon when you bounced your way down the stairs, nearly bumping into Bam who was going up. He had his phone in his hand, his thumb on the keypad as he looked up at you from his spot on the stair. “Hey,” he greeted you. “Want me to order pizza for dinner?”

“Um,” you trailed off. “Sure, if you want. Maybe you can share it with Dunn and Jess.”

It was only then that Bam noticed the bag you brought with you whenever you were sleeping over at a friend’s house in your hand. His brow raised, already knowing exactly who you were going to see. “Where are you going?” He asked, the look on your face answering the question. “Knoxville’s place? Again?”

“Yes, again,” you rolled your eyes as you pushed past him, walking down the last few steps. “We’re dating, remember? Couples normally see each other more than once a week.”

Bam copied you by giving you an eyeroll of his own. “Thanks, I had no idea,” he says. “But you were just with him yesterday. How come you and I and Jess can never hang out as actual siblings for once? He’s never here, and now I hardly see you anymore thanks to Knoxville.”

You laugh, shaking your head as you slip on your shoes, leaning against the wall as you tie them. “We see each other all the time. We live together, and have been for twenty four years now,” you point out, standing up straight once the laces were tied. “And as for Jess, he’ll be home for the next two weeks. We can have a pizza night tomorrow, if you want.”

“Fine,” Bam mutters, turning his back to you. “Tell your boyfriend I said hi.”

With one hand on the doorknob, you let out a sigh as you watch your brother sulk up the stairs. “You know, one day you’re gonna have to accept our relationship,” you call out to him, making him pause on the middle step. “He makes me happy, okay? I’ve never felt this way about anyone before.”

Bam gives you a look of disgust, shaking his head afterwards. “That’s awesome,” he said. “As long as you’re happy.” And with that, he disappeared upstairs.

The conversation stuck with you all the way to Johnny’s house. Even as you were sitting next to the man himself, tucked protectively under his arm, your mind was elsewhere. “Hey,” his voice broke you out of your thoughts. “What’s got you so distracted today?”

You shake your head, chewing on your lip in slight embarrassment. “Sorry,” you mumbled. “I was just thinking about Bam. He really doesn’t like us being together.”

Johnny laughed, kissing the side of your head. He kept his mouth pressed to your hair as he said the next words, making them come out muffled, “Well, he’s just going to have to deal with it,” he pulled away to be able to look you in the eye. “We’ve been together for seven months now. He’s lucky he doesn’t know that I popped your cherry a few months back.”

At his words, your face heats up and you shrink into his side, a warmth spreading throughout your entire body. This guy could never be too serious for too long.

Johnny laughed at your reaction, his hand sliding down your body to poke at your side. “That would probably be his breaking point, us sleeping together,” when the tip of his index finger pressed against the skin of your stomach, you jolted forward, an uneasy feeling seeping into your lower torso. “Sorry, did I hurt you?” He asked quickly, sitting up with you as you hunched over, your arms wrapping around your frame.

“No,” you say through gritted teeth, exhaling shakily as you try to breathe through the sudden wave of nausea. “No, I’m okay. I’m good.” You push through it and sit back once again, making Johnny raise a brow.

“Are you sure?” He asked, hesitating to wrap his arm around you again. You force out a laugh and grab his hand, wrapping his arm around your shoulder and lacing your fingers together. “Do you feel sick?”

“I’m fine,” you assure him, leaning up to press a chaste kiss to his lips. “I promise.”

You bid Jess a goodbye as he once again had to leave for his job, before walking back to the living room on shaky legs.

You hear Bam bolt down the stairs, followed by the sound of the front door opening. He shouts a quick ‘bye’ to his older brother before the door is slammed shut, making you jump slightly from your place on the couch.

Bam soon walked into the room, his eyes landing on your figure almost instantly. He would’ve walked past you had he not taken notice of your shaking figure and the way your face was glistening with a light layer of sweat. “Hey, are you okay?” He asked, sitting next to you and placing his palm flat against your forehead. “What’s wrong?”

If you weren’t feeling like death itself, you would’ve swatted his hand away as soon as it made contact with your skin, but clearly that was something you couldn’t do at this moment. “I don’t feel well,” you whimper, wrapping your arms tighter around your middle. “God, it hurts.”

Bam removes his hand from your head, wiping away the small bit of sweat that gathered on it on his pants. “What does? Your stomach?” When you nod in response, Bam tried to move your arms, but you just shook your head and sunk further into the cushion. “How long has it been hurting?”

You shrug as best as you could. “Few weeks,”

“A few weeks?” Bam repeats your words, not bothering to hide the shock mixed with annoyance in his voice. “Why haven’t you gone to the hospital?”

“I thought it would go away,”

“Yeah? How’d that work out for ya?” Bam shook his head as he stood up, feeling the pockets of his pants for his keys. “Come on, I’m taking you to the hospital.”

“Bam, really, I-”

“Shut up,” he cut you off, gently grabbing your arm and pulling you up.

“What?” Your ears were burning as you tried to process the words that were being spoken to you.

“Honey, this is great news!” The doctor said in a cheerful voice, clearly not reading the room.

You blink at her from your hunched over position. “I’m….what?”

“Two months pregnant!” She smiled at you. You begin to hyperventilate at the confirmation, your breathing becoming quick and unsteady. “Oh, sweetie, you shouldn’t hunch over like that, you’ll crush the baby!” She walks over to you and places her hands on your arms, gently lifting you into a stiffer seated position.

“I’ll what?” You failed to clue in that she was just joking.

“That was just a joke, honey,” she laughed awkwardly. “I can see you’re a bit tense at the moment and wanted to lighten the mood.”

You shake your head. “Oh, my God,” you mumble. “What will they think?”

The question burned in your mind on your way back to the waiting room. ‘They’, obviously being Bam and Johnny. Would Johnny want to have a baby with you? Will he leave you? Will Bam kill Johnny for knocking up his little sister? Will Bam still talk to you after this?

“Hey,” Bam stood up from the plastic chair once he saw you enter the room. “How’d it go? Is everything okay?”

You couldn’t tell him, not now. You couldn’t.

So, you wipe away the terrified look you had been wearing since you received the news and nod. “Yep,” you say, your voice nearly betraying you with how forced it sounded. “It’s just a common flu. I should be better in a few days.”

At that, Bam sighs in relief. “Okay, good,” he says as you begin to make your way back to the entrance. “What now?”

“Rest,” you tell him as the automatic doors open. “Now I just need to rest.”

And figure out how the hell to tell you I’m pregnant.

“Please say something,” you were begging for any indication on how he was feeling.

Is he mad? Pissed? Excited? You had no clue as Johnny’s mouth seemed stuck open and had been since you told him you were two months pregnant.

You huff quietly, furrowing your brow in frustration. “Johnny, please, talk to me,” you pleaded. “Anything, anything at all would help.”

Johnny shook his head, seeming to have broken himself out of the trance he was in. He swallowed harshly, looking over at you from your spot beside him on the couch. “Are you sure? I mean, how do you know?”

“I went to the hospital,” you begin, looking away from your boyfriend. “Well, Bam pretty much forced me to go when he found out I hadn’t been feeling well lately, and-”

“You haven’t been feeling well?” Johnny cut you off with a question. “Is that why you haven’t let me touch you for the past two weeks?”

At your look of guilt, it all started to make sense to him.

“Yeah, sorry,” you trail off, meeting his eyes once again when you realized that he had yet to tell you how he felt about the whole situation. “The doctor confirmed it. But, Johnny, I need to know what you’re thinking about all this. Are you mad at me?”

Johnny’s face dropped at your words, his brows furrowing in confusion. “Mad at you?” He asked, slightly insulted at your question. “Baby, why would I be mad at you? We’re going to be parents! This is good, right?”

He tugged on your hands, his words calming your racing heart more than he would ever know. “R-right,” you nodded, raising a brow in surprise. “I just thought you wouldn’t want me to have this baby. We haven’t been together for that long and this is a pretty permanent thing.”

Johnny shook his head, pulling you into a hug. He wrapped his arms around your shoulders, his chin pressing against the top of your head. “Of course I want you to have this baby. I want you to have our baby,” he continued to assure you, providing you with the comfort you desperately needed. “Yeah, we’ve been together for seven months, but I think I’ve made the way I feel about you pretty clear, haven’t I?”

You nodded against his chest, your fingers twisting his shirt. “Yeah,”

Johnny pulled away, keeping his hands on your shoulders and looking you in the eyes. “I love you and I’m so excited to do this with you, I promise. This kid is going to have the best parents ever,” you laugh tearfully at his words, pressing the heel of your hand against your eyes to stop the tears from falling.

“I haven’t even told Bam yet,” you whisper, looking back up at Johnny while wiping your hand on your sweatpants. “He’s going to kill me.”

Johnny waved off your words, taking your hand in his. “He’ll have to deal with me first,” he said, giving you his signature smile. “Move in with me.”

The sudden change of subject caught you off guard and you let out a small, surprised laugh. “What?”

“Yeah, why not?” He shrugged, leaning back on the couch. “Been wanting to ask you for a while now, I think this is a pretty good time, no?”

You grinned up at him, snuggling into his side. “Yeah,” you hum in agreement. “I think now is the perfect time.”

“I can’t believe you’re moving in with him,” Bam muttered as he grabbed yet another box from the car.

You roll your eyes as you tug your suitcase behind you. “Are you going to say that with every trip into the house?” You ask as you both enter Johnny’s house. “You would think that it has been processed completely in your head by now.”

He eyed you, his brows pressing together in a way that showed you how much he didn’t care for your words. He looked at your outfit and further furrowed his brows. “What’s with the sweater? It’s hot as fuck outside.”

Your eyes widened as you looked down at your shirt. It was one of Johnny’s as his clothes were much bigger on you and covered your growing bump quite well. You should’ve known that Bam would’ve pointed it out sooner or later. “I was cold earlier and haven’t taken it off yet,” that sounded like a decent lie, right?

Bam just shook his head. He turned left and entered the living room, putting the box down near the couch as he watched Johnny silently struggle with building the dresser he bought for you. Oddly enough, he never bought one for himself since he moved into this house. Instead, he just kept his hundreds of t-shirts and jeans in his closet. “Hey, Bam,” Johnny said as he held onto the piece of wood tightly, trying to come off as if he wasn’t severely struggling. “Feel like helping me out?”

You hold back a laugh as you lean the suitcase up against the wall. “Yeah, sure,” Bam mumbled as he made his way over to his friend. “You got the rest of the boxes?” He asked, glancing behind him and meeting your eyes.

“Yeah, I got ‘em,” you say as you lean against the doorframe. You watched for a bit as Bam seemed to drop his grumpy look and actually started to give Johnny a chance, something that made your heart leap in happiness.

Before they could catch you staring, you turned back around and grabbed the rest of the boxes and bags.

Months have gone by since you moved in with Johnny, and today you had the house to yourself. He went out to pick up some stuff to renovate the spare room and make it suitable for the baby and you decided to stay back and clean out the room. You were trying to help out as much as you could, but you were nearing your sixth month, and things were getting harder and harder to do by yourself.

Dressed in a black tank top and grey sweats, you were halfway down the stairs when the front door opened. It was in clear view from your spot on the stairs, but before you could call out to your boyfriend, the person who opened the door had any and all words becoming caught in your throat.

“Bam..”

He closed the door behind him, not looking up from his phone as he typed out what you could only assume to be a text. Once it was sent, he tucked the phone in his pocket before finally looking up at your frozen figure on the stairs. “Hey, is Knoxville home? We need to go over some stunts for the new movie-” he cuts himself off when he notices your round belly. “What the fuck.”

There was, quite literally, nothing you could do to hide the fact that you were pregnant and had been for the last five months. So, you say the only thing you could think of, “Jesus, Bam, don’t you know how to knock?”

He stepped closer once you resumed your walk down the stairs. “You’re pregnant?”

You inhale sharply, guilt seeping into you when you knew you’d have to tell him that you lied to him at the hospital. “Yes,”

“What the fuck, Y/n? How long? When did this even happen?” He was shooting out one question after the other and it made your head spin.

“A while, Bam,” you trailed off, scratching your neck. “I’ve been pregnant for a while.”

He glared at you. “How long is a while?”

Deciding to just get it over with, you huff out a breath and stand a bit straighter. “Five months,”

His eyes widened even more. “Five months? When the fuck did you even find out?”

“Like three months ago…with… you,”

Bam gave you a confused look, shaking his head slightly. “With me?” Then it clicked. “I took you to the hospital and you told me it was the flu. You lied to me?”

At your silence, Bam got his answer.

“Why would you lie to me?”

“Because I knew you’d react like this,” you mutter, taking your brother by surprise. “You never accepted my relationship with Johnny. Never even gave it a chance. How was I supposed to tell you when I was terrified you’d never talk to me again?”

“What were you expecting, Y/n?” The way he said your name felt like a stab directly to your heart. He sounded as if he was beyond disappointed, and if you were being honest, you didn’t blame him one bit. “What, four months from now when you have the fucking thing - were you planning on hiding it from me then, too? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I was scared,” your voice was barely a whisper at this point.

“That doesn’t matter, I could’ve- I-” his hand came up to tug on his hair. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me for three months. I don’t even know who you are right now.”

His words brought out a whimper from you and you reached out to him. He stepped away and turned around, opening the door and slamming it behind him.

You step back and sit down on one of the steps, trying to calm your breathing down as you feel the hot sting of tears form in your eyes.

An hour passes by before you hear the front door open once again. Still sitting on the second stair from the bottom, you look up with teary eyes and meet Johnny’s. He had a smile on his face that faded as soon as he saw the tear streaks on your face.

He dropped the bag on the floor next to the still open door and moved quickly to sit next to you, wrapping his arm around your shoulder and pulling you into his side. “What happened? What’s wrong?”

You blinked back more tears as you held onto his shirt tightly. “Bam came over today,” you begin and already Johnny felt like he knew where this was going. “He knows, Johnny. He saw me.” You pressed a hand to your belly and Johnny watched as you held back a sob.

He tugged you closer to him. “What did he say?”

“He doesn’t know who I am anymore,” you whispered. “He’s so mad at me, Johnny, he’s so disappointed. I lied to him.”

Johnny shook his head. “Probably because you knew he’d act like this,” he muttered, more to himself but you still heard him.

“I feel so bad. This should be something I share with my brother,” you whimpered. “Now he wants nothing to do with me.”

“You don’t know that, right?” He asked and you just shrugged. “And if it means anything, the guys are so happy for us. Steveo says he’s going to be the best uncle to our kid, he can’t wait to meet him or her. You’ve got a whole team behind you. Bam will come around eventually.”

“But I lied to him,” you point out.

“And he’ll get over it,” Johnny assured you, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “It’s gonna be okay, I promise.”

His words, like always, provide you with comfort and you nod, moving so you are sitting on his lap and wrapping your arms around his shoulders.

Days go by, and Bam has successfully ignored every single one of your calls. You hadn’t spoken to him since he found out about your pregnancy, and not being in contact with your brother was slowly driving you insane.

You wanted him to be a part of this chapter in your life as you knew he’d be a great uncle, but how could you fix your relationship with him when he was constantly dodging your calls?

Today was the sixth month mark, or so they say, and you were scheduled for a checkup. Johnny grabbed the keys from off the table beside the door and placed his hand on the small of your back. As soon as the door was opened, you were met with the sight of your brother.

He was about to knock, seeming to have learned his lesson from last time, and dropped his hand when he saw the two of you. “Hi,” was all he said.

“Hey, Bam,” Johnny answered for the both of you.

Bam noticed both your attires and asked, “Are you going somewhere?”

“Yeah,” you say. “Um, just a checkup.”

Your brother nodded, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “That’s… good,”

Furrowing your brows, you refrained from reaching out and hugging the guy you missed more than you care to admit. “Bam, I’m sorry,” you settle on saying instead. “I shouldn’t have lied to you and kept this from you for so long. Can you forgive me?”

Bam avoided eye contact with Johnny as he slowly nodded. “Yeah. I’m sorry, too. I didn’t mean what I said, I was just pissed off,”

At the rare apology, you smile and discreetly wipe away a single tear that managed to fall. “You have nothing to be sorry about,” you say and step forward, wrapping your arms around him. Surprisingly, he returned the hug with nearly as much desperation. He meets Johnny’s eye and gives him a small nod. “You should come with us, if you want.” You offer once you pull away.

Bam nodded. “Sure, okay,” he answered. He stepped away and watched as Johnny helped you down the few steps that led to the walkway. “You guys are good together. This kid’s gonna have some pretty cool parents.”

The words of his approval made you tear up again and you glance at Johnny, who looked shocked as well. “Thanks, Bam,” he once again answered for the two of you, wrapping his arm around your shoulders. “They’re going to have a pretty cool uncle, too.”

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michelle-is-writing · 11 months

Text

Bathtub, Johnny Knoxville

Word Count: 1.1k~

Over the years, I’ve learned that Jackass comes with a lot of laughs as well as sore muscles and achy bones. Now, I don’t have to experience anything like this, thankfully, as Johnny has essentially banned me from ever doing the crazy stunts with the guys. He’s made it clear to me that he doesn’t want me to get hurt, but that’s coming from the same man who has done the infamous cup test more than once. Even when I somehow manage to get caught in the crossfire of their ridiculous yet hilarious stunts, he’s still very protective and takes care of me.

Of course, I do the same for him when he gets hurt; granted, his injuries are more severe than my occasional small skin grazes. Still, whatever he thinks will make him feel better, I do. Tonight, he suggested maybe a hot bath would help with his tender back. The guys had engaged in a paintball war for one of their stunts in their new movie, and Johnny managed to avoid every paintball in front of him. On the other hand, his back is littered with purple circles with pink and red splotches surrounding those bruises as well as cuts from the harsh impact of the many paintballs. As soon as he showed me his back after finishing the skit, I knew just how bad his back was going to bruise after a while.

With warm water surrounding us, Johnny lies back against me in the tub as he lets relaxation take over him. It’s so calm in here you could almost fall asleep, but it’s never a good idea to do that in the tub. Johnny does that enough behind the wheel, which is something I absolutely hate, but at the same time, it’s also an excuse for me to join him up front and spend time with him.

“Babygirl, thank you for this,” he tells me, releasing a sigh afterward as he nuzzles his head further into my chest, getting his hair wet in the process. He doesn’t care about this, of course, as he’s now comfortable, and with the way he’s closing his eyes, he is definitely going to fall asleep.

“Nuh-uh, Johnny, don’t fall asleep,” I tell him, guiding my hand through his damp raven locks. This action gets his attention, but he doesn’t open his eyes. “You can’t go to sleep in the tub, I won’t be able to get your ass out.”

He laughs at this, his eyes crinkling together before opening them to reveal his beautiful brown eyes to me, shining up at me with nothing but adoration. “I love you so much, honey,” he murmurs, his tone showing how heartfelt he’s being right now. These are the moments I crave, the moments where we’re joking one moment, and the next, we’re declaring our love for each other.

However, just before I get to respond to Johnny's words, a loud bang sounds throughout the bathroom as the door swings open, revealing Johnny’s friends as they laugh crazily. Immediately, I slide down further in the tub with my hands covering my chest as Johnny pushes his back against me with his arms covering my sides. He’s always protective over me, no matter what, even if that means revealing himself entirely at the same time.

“May I ask what the fuck you guys are doing here?!” Johnny exclaims while Bam and Dunn try to catch their breaths.

“Dude, we didn’t think (Y/n) was in here with you,” Bam admits to us, making me roll my eyes. Would it have been so hard for them to check beforehand? Then again, this is Bam and Dunn we’re talking about; they share a single brain cell as it is.

“Well, if you don’t mind, I’d like to get back to enjoying a bath with my wife,” Johnny says, his voice being blunt with each word. “So if you could all leave now…”

“Got room for one more?” Pontius’ infamous voice makes its way into the bathroom, making me reach my breaking point. With a groan, I grab the nearest shampoo bottle before throwing it at the boys, hitting Bam in the head before it bounces and hits Dunn. They all laugh at us, shortly leaving afterward while Johnny faces me and shakes his head. Not to mention the loud bang we heard was Dunn kicking the door in, meaning the hinge is now broken. So, as the guys left the doorway after realizing they couldn’t close the door, they all muttered a small “sorry” while failing to fight off their laughter.

“I’m sorry about them,” Johnny murmurs to me, closing his eyes as he shakes his head. I don’t know why he’s apologizing; these are our friends after all, but then again, Johnny is very protective of me. “I don’t know why the hell they’re like that, and I don’t know how the hell they got in, but baby, please-“

Before Johnny can say anymore, I gently grip his chin and tilt his head back to me so I can connect our lips. The action silences Johnny immediately as he kisses me back, ignoring the sounds of his friends still messing with each other in our home. Although, once he parts from me, he looks over at the bathroom door and groans, his previous moment of calmness now replaced by frustration.

“They knocked the damn door off its hinges,” he points the obvious out, making me sigh with him. The door wasn’t even locked since this is mine and Johnny’s house; we’ve never had to lock the doors. Again, because Bam and Dunn share a brain cell, they didn’t think of that beforehand.

“I’ll make them fix it,” I assure Johnny, leaning down to kiss his cheek. “But why don’t we go ahead and get out before they destroy the house? The water is getting kind of cold.”

Johnny lets out a short laugh at my suggestion before ultimately snuggling into me like before. “Just a few more minutes,” he murmurs, his eyes now closed as a tired sigh leaves his nose.

Knowing there’s no winning in this situation, I give in to Johnny and find myself relaxing back against the tub like before when the bathroom door could still close all the way. No wonder Johnny was stressed when he came home. Then again, I would be too if I came home to escape the incessant jokes and pranks at work, only for it to follow me here too.

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