It's odd that despite the fact I'm definitely genderfluid, I avoid publicly expressing or accepting my feminine moods bc I hate being misgendered so much, even if it wouldn't necessarily be misgendering at the moment.

Like I know a large swath of people on principle don't respect my gender, and only want to see me as a woman (or a man, depending on their initial assumptions. I've had that happen too).

As far as binaries, I'm more comfortable being gendered as a man, but I'm not just a man, and every time someone clearly overwhelmingly thinks of me that way, it's kind of nice because it's not the alternative, but I also find myself trying too hard to shove myself into an uncomfortable box again. I always hate when someone exclusively thinks of me as a woman. It doesn't feel right for me, it doesn't even feel biologically right because I have so many masculine features. It's the kind of thing where you go "i mean, technically yes I have lady genitals, but I also have really high testosterone, can grow facial hair, I have such an irregular and light period that most months I don't even get it, and my general build is more androgynous than one or the other." It's uncomfy to even shove my body into a binary box, even if it technically falls under female. It feels like a technicality. This is 90% of why I don't like talking about my AGAB irl, and the other 10% is because there are fair odds the person who asked is likely to see me as a woman only from there on out. It has been brought up before, but whether I'm intersex or not is a question for a gynecologist, and moving on from biology-

I just feel like I'd be more comfortable expressing all facets and ever-shifting variants of my gender if there weren't expectation-laden binaries attached.

I could be a girl one day and a man the next if people wouldn't just start misgendering me forever as soon as I show a touch too much femininity. I can't be a lady every once and a while because if I do, other people will just run with that. I have to actively struggle to assert that I am not a woman among people who know my AGAB, and I'm not comfortable being thought of as female so long as I know it is the default, or what some people think I "should" be. Because I am not.

how to build compelling characters

Sorry but Kabru is so fascinating to me as a character, in a pure mechanical sense, because of what Ryoko Kui does with him. Everything about him is a red herring. He's deliberately introduced as some kind of rival for Laios, a party leader who is hopeless against monsters but absolutely brilliant with people both in and out of combat, and who has good reason to oppose him.

By the end of chapter 31, you might even think Kabru's going to end up as some sort of anti-villain, an antagonist with the best of intentions who nevertheless tries to foil our hero's plans. He wants to defeat the Mad Mage himself, he suspects Laios of being too irresponsible to be trusted with control of the dungeon, and his crew even thinks that Laios's party stole from them (and they're kind of right!). All signs point towards an inevitable showdown.

And then ... none of that happens.

Confrontation over the stolen treasure? Kabru is literally too smart to fall for the classic miscommunication trope and correctly decides it's not worth making a big deal of.

Kabru's deadly PVP skills? Aside from trying to take down Falin, he never fights another human again.

Wanting to be the one who defeats the dungeon? Turns out he was only doing that because he didn't think any other adventurer would have people's best interests at heart, and he's more than willing to play a support role in the whole affair.

Thinking Laios is up to no good? He really did just want to get to know the guy more. He has his misgivings, but ultimately ends up trusting Laios with his life.

Is Kabru going to get some sort of comeuppance for hating monsters and not appreciating their ecosystem? Well no, he has good reasons for hating monsters. He ends up wanting to learn about them through Laios's eyes, but he's never forced into any "Wow, guess I was wrong about them!" revelation.

Hell, even his implied ladykiller ways, which might lead you to think he'll end up being the stock "chivalrous lech" type of character, don't really manifest. He has a lot of opportunities to act flirtatiously around women, but doesn't. He's just a guy whose natural charisma makes him into human catnip.

And that's all hysterical to me, to pull it off. It's a fascinating way to tell a story. To introduce a character explicitly as a rival, potentially even a villain, and instead make them a deuteragonist. It's like a magician making a coin disappear, then slowing down their trick to show you the misdirection. "Did you see what I did there?" they ask with a wink. "The coin was in my other hand the entire time."

ngl, I'm beginning to take issue with how in conversations about anti-intellectualism almost automatically, the face of girls and women will be slapped on the problem.

FNAF movie Mike isn’t wrong, but he’s not right either..

Based off @/Tanijrou post on twitter

They need a bigger bathtub.

you know what, since we've been talking about how annoying it is when people react like "what drugs were they on when they wrote this 🤪" when someone is creative, i just wanna say

everyone who says "HOW IS THIS A KIDS' MOVIE 😱😱", when a kids' movie is a little bit out of the box and features dark or deep imagery and meanings, owes me one thousand euros

Eddie casually touching Buck through the seasons.

If you follow my main you had to know this was coming… anyway. Enjoy these bloodweave doodles :)

found out today that Weird Al was almost Lucifer's VA and promptly lost my mind. Hell's Greatest Dad was almost a polka and im so upset about the fact that i can genuinely still HEAR the polka inspiration in it

Laios's three Boy Best Friends. And yes, they hate him.

How Aziraphale Responds to being Pinned to a Wall

Aziraphale trusts Crowley more than God, part 1/?

bonus:

I AM SO NORMAL ABOUT HIM

Evil!Sun my beloved (Edit// This Evil!Sun is from TSAMS and is not an AU of mine guys)

Bonus doodle

so like... teeth... fangs, even.........

(silly) xtra under the cut

smfh tfw ur trying to joke but friend snitches you tf out

I hate the sewers . jpg

Bribed with Chocolate. The way it should be.

Part 22 || First || Previous || Next

--Full Series--

More to come as this is a two-parter. But you know how I am with schedules.

Bonus:

I think this was an equally possible reaction from Chara.