one of my very stupid and very specific little issues (that I don't know if other multilingual people experience) is that sometimes, I can only think of a word that feels perfect for what I want to say, in a language that isn't the one in which i'm currently writing. and it's almost never a word for which I just don't have a translation, or it's not like one of those "untranslatable" expressions/cultural phenomena/whatever, they're just... words. that have a vibe their equivalent in another language doesn't have the same exact way I want it.

like right now, I'm trying to write something in English. I'm trying to describe a character saying something quietly, and tenderly, but my brain is being very helpful by supplying me with only the Spanish phrase "al oído". Which has the perfect feel to it: it's soft, it's round, it essentially means "to the ear" or "by the hearing", and to say something al oído is... kind of to whisper in confidence so softly, that it can barely be heard. The words are more breath than sound, and you're saying it in private, for that specific person's hearing only. But that's just so many words, compared to saying that he whispered his agreement al oído.

or I want to say that someone is "szabadkozik", which is Hungarian for... kind of to make flustered excuses? Not really in a way that's reluctant necessarily, but it is to... kind of faff, and play at reluctance in a manner that may be slightly embarrassed, or just politely playing at embarrassment, being coy? And I could circumscribe it like that, I could say that he's excusing himself coyly or something, but my brain just keeps going "no, that's wrong, he's szabadkozik, you should say that". It's frustrating.

I kind of want to write a piece where I just... let myself code switch as many times as I want to. Just to see what it feels like to let my brain do its thing without trying to contain it. It would be fucking incomprehensible.

Birbna going through a molt... Maybe she'd let you help her with pin feathers. You ought to be very careful - they hurt when disturbed. But if you open the pins gently, you can free the stuck feathers and soothe the pain. Brushing Birbna's wings with a soft hairbrush, only to find out later that many birds only trust their mates to preen them anywhere but the head.

she tries not to let you see, not to force you to bear witness to this... mess. Binah knows she's hideous now, a warped beast of feathers and eyes and claws. you shouldn't have to deal with this. it's her burden to bear, her punishment

but alas, you're perceptive, as you always were, following the scattered feathers to where she's tucked herself away, hunched over and scratching erratically at her skin. she stiffens when you approach, then slowly slumps and extends one of her wings at your gentle request, trembling when you begin to carefully run your fingers through the feathers

you use the utmost care as you straighten bent feathers and remove loose ones, Binah leaning more and more of her weight on you until she abruptly sweeps her wings around you for a close hug. you're so gentle with her, so sweet and delicate despite how she's a monster now. or, more of a monster than she was. her claws run through her feathers, plucking a particularly glossy one with an iridescent sheen and pressing it into your hands. you'll keep it, won't you? to show that you're hers, and she's yours?

sue me idc but i think that Jason and Tim would both like things that are considered "childish" typically, i.e. Legos or dinosaurs or stuffed rabbits random stuff like that and they would both try and hide the fact until one of em found out, in my brain it goes like this:

Jason is rearranging his room and has a box of action figures n Legos set out and Tim comes in while he's cleaning and sees the box and Jason starts to get defensive but then Tim just grabs his arm and leads him to his room where he has a similar bin filled w various stuffed toys n Legos and colored pencils. they bond over this shared trait, building new Lego sets together or on some occasions playing with action figures of themselves. they both have this trait for different reasons tho -

For Jason, his parents couldn't afford toys or wouldn't buy them for him and wnv his mom tried to get him a toy his dad always ended up breaking it or it wouldn't even be a toy in the first place it'd just be some trash, and then when he became homeless he just couldn't afford toys/didn't want to seem "weak".

For Tim tho, his parents wanted him to succeed and they thought having "childish interests" like drawing or playing with Legos would hinder his maturity and so he never got to experience those various joys after the age of like, 6

So for both of them, moving to the manor and having some amount of wealth gave them the opportunity to relive parts of their childhood that they were never allowed to experience fully.

This isn't to say that none of the other batkids would play w Legos or have stuffed animals, just that i think Jason and Tim would feel like they had to hide it moreso than others.

Amnesia is a comedy, actually.

art vs artist 2023

how not to be lay on the ground and cry forever about some small comparatively minor instance of things not going my way

Kinda surprised I've never seen anyone draw Jin with a Decidueye before, it fits so well with his thief outfit.

I feel like this Hylia is like, the ultimate most Hylia I've ever done. After this I'm done with her, no more!! Hahaha

I need to find better hobbies because all I want to do rn is draw and crochet but my right hand is like. Screaming bloody murder at me to not to. Like. Carpal tunnel is not an "if" but "when."

I had a bunch of sewing to do these past two weeks, so I was finally able to get some listening time and start @breakerwhiskey

And I was expecting it to be good because I have utmost trust in the compatibility of Lauren Shippen's writing with my tastes in stories (plus even years after finishing the Bright Sessions main series her voice still feels like home in a very comforting way)

But it's just..... It's so good. It's so so good. I'm about halfway through with what's been released so far (about to start episode 86 after posting this) and I love all of it. I love Whiskey and I love the mistery and the small crumbs we've been starting to get (especially the past ten episodes)

The narrative device (woman talking in the void of her CB radio and eventually getting some response while on a roadtrip across America with weird/veeery low-key horror-y vibes) is reminding me of what it was like to listen to Alice isn't Dead for the first time, and I mean that as a very high compliment

So idk. If you like audio drama take this as me heartily recommending this one, and if not thanks for letting /me/ ramble in the void

🙂😈

I haven't sculpted much in my life but since I'm queer I can just watch a tutorial and do it you see

/kind of ref

binah’s #1 fan do you wanna see my binah merch when it gets here

yes.

Ya know, of all the things coming to PRSK for the 3.5 anniversary update, the one I'm the most excited for is being able to switch a sixth character. Because not a lot of videos are like that.

In fact there are like, what, 5 (?) MVs that feature 6 characters.

Miku (Anamanaguchi)

Gunjou Sanka

Journey

NEO

And that one VS song I can't remember the name of and can't be bothered to look up (sorrynotsorry)

And in those songs, unless she was in your team, Miku was always the sixth person. If she was in your team, it'd be whichever Unit Leader (or VS for the VS group song) was lined up first or not in your team.

Finished Danganronpa Lapse and tbh nobody gets it like I do because every review I've seen wasn't made by someone who's played zero escape Why did Echo do that? ZTD shifting strats that's why! Lyle's canonically a zero escape nerd who brings up the morphogenetic field as a quick joke and is introduced arguing about the funyarinpa, do I think all these references get in the way and that it's a bit underwhelming when this comes unexplained out of nowhere? Absolutely! But it's so clearly an element the creator was inspired by and wanted to include and play with rather than a lazy last minute deal to fix 'plot holes'

To @novafirst1 who's been leaving so many funny and thoughtful tags on my old End of the World art (waving back at you - yes I see and appreciate you, thank you so much), I saw you were wondering about some things regarding the fic's development and whether my drawings still fit in or not, and I thought maybe I should officially clear that up or whatever, because I don't think I ever have?

So, some things to keep in mind about my drawings:

1) I almost always draw scenes while I'm drafting them, not after they're done, so often they diverge from what ends up in the fic. This is especially true of anything from chapter 21 and forward. The story takes a big turn around there and it's where I started fucking big things up in my old, old first draft. Sometimes I feel like deleting some of the art that has nothing to do with what actually happens in the fic anymore, but I also have a lifelong policy of never deleting anything, so…

2) My OC Ren was written out of the story a long time ago because she was introduced way too late in the story and her role could be redistributed between other characters, mainly Serizawa. I still love Ren, though. I've stored her away in a little corner of my mind, hoping some day she'll be of use in a different story.

3) Shimazaki was also written out of the story quite long ago. I honestly don't remember what his deal was that well because every time I change something in this fic, the old version is immediately purged from my mind so I don't confuse myself too much. Ehh, he kind of had the role Iida has now, except not really? Like, the end purpose of that role was similar, but his methods and motivations were wildly different (and more uninteresting) and it was executed in a way where it forced other characters into situations instead of letting them decide to go there on their own, taking too much of their agency away. It didn't work well, so I axed him. I don't miss him. Well, okay, I had one scene where he dumped Shou in the middle of a desert, I kinda miss that one, but apart from that, don't miss him.

4) I don't know if this is very apparent from just my art, but several of my OCs/might-as-well-be-OCs (like Shou's mom or Fukuda, Higashio, and Ootsuki) have been tweaked quite a bit along the way. For example, speaking of Iida, he started out as some random Claw henchman, and now he's one of the most central characters to the main plot line. Whoops? Satsune and Himiko's personalities drifted from what I originally expected from them, affecting their actions in the story. I've recently made some huge changes/additions to Higashio's scenes because I felt like you didn't get to know him well enough. I know I'll have to do the same for Ootsuki. The list goes on...

5) Bottom line: Everything is fluid! Sometimes I draw stuff and then change my mind with reckless abandon the next day. Nothing is real until it's on AO3