"It has taken me all my life up to now to fall in love with the world, but
I’ve started to feel it the last couple of years. To fall in love with the world
isn’t to ignore or overlook suffering, both human and otherwise. For me
anyway, to fall in love with the world is to look up at the night sky and feel
your mind swim before the beauty and the distance of the stars. It is to hold
your children while they cry, to watch as the sycamore trees leaf out in June.
When my breastbone starts to hurt, and my throat tightens, and tears well in
my eyes, I want to look away from feeling. I want to deflect with irony, or
anything else that will keep me from feeling directly. We all know how
loving ends. But I want to fall in love with the world anyway, to let it crack
me open. I want to feel what there is to feel while I am here."
John Green - The anthropocene reviewed
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03.04.2024
Don’t know how Gem puts up with me anymore, all I wanna do is braid her over and over again 🤷♀️😅
Attempt number 53946274931 to repel biddybids from taking over her mane and making me go insane!!!
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Shout out to the survivors...
... who are in therapy.
... who want to be in therapy, but can't afford it.
... who aren't sure if therapy is going to help.
... who cope with trauma through art and writing.
... who cope with trauma in "ugly" ways.
... who have personality disorders.
... who struggle with executive dysfunction.
... who are trying to catch up on the childhood they never got.
... who are LGBT+ and closeted.
... who are LGBT+ and out.
... who are still finding themselves.
... who struggle with body image.
... who need reassurance and encouragement to get through the day.
... who have cut ties with abusers, and those who haven't.
... who keep themselves going for the little things.
... who have a hard time finding reasons to live, but keep on going anyway.
... who have lost people close to them.
... who might need to hear this today...
You are worthy of love. You are worthy of respect. You are worthy of healing. You are loved. Be patient and kind with yourself today. You're amazing! ♡
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Dialogue is fun until it has to be grammatically correct.
For context: Cassey's Stick and Murder Machine from the Future gets oop-de-doo's after one too many missions. But no fear, for Donnie's here to save the day!--aaaand get his hand on the tech he's been trying to get his hands on for months, right. In for a dime, in for a dollar, as they say.
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I don’t see anyone talking about it but I’ve been thinking so much lately about the five times Jean was SA’d by the Ravens at Riko’s demand.
We see so much about Andrew’s past and I think that’s super important, as someone with a similar past I find it oddly comforting to see that representation within a character that means so much to me. But I feel like as a fandom we gloss over Jean’s sexual trauma. We talk a lot about his torture at the hands of Riko but nobody ever talks about how horrific it must have been for him to be raped not once but five times by his team. And it would’ve been more had Riko not gotten bored of it when Jean stopped resisting.
I get that Jean isn’t as big of a character as the Foxes or Riko but his storyline is absolutely heartbreaking and I wish there was more content that delves into it. His torture is mentioned in fics but I’d love to see more of his story. I’d love to read more about how people think he heals. I want to see him be able to get past this. Obviously we don’t see him struggling after the assaults but one can only assume it left a lasting affect on him.
Anyways, this is my proposal to have more Jean content talk about the grimy parts of what happened to him and then show how he heals from it all. There’s tons of Andrew fics like that and I think Jean deserves the same healing.
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My week has been shit but I finally managed to start writing the next chapter of Bite the Hand by projecting my own insecurities onto Frost.
unlike me though, Frost is crying while getting hot and heavy with Graves and I’m just crying with my cat…
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quietly gritting my teeth every time I think "ugh I'm writing these characters talking like they've had way too much therapy" and reminding myself "bitch you LITERALLY write this shit rather than going to therapy yourself, a couple thousand words of subconscious wish fulfillment around working through identity and relationship anxieties is actually NOT a bad outcome here"
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