I don’t think I’ve ever been so happy after being on the phone for three whole hours. Holy shit. Originally, it was to play pokemon together so i had my headphones on for hands for the game and eventually it just turned into me doing laundry and talking about random shit. I mean, between my sister deciding to throw a deflated rotting pumpkin into the yard (which held up shockingly. It got pancaked though.) and me yelling at that infinite dryer buzzer all while on call. I’ve had so many doubts about getting with this guy simply because of the whole weird memory I have of him from high school, but genuinely, I’m getting really cozy with this idea. 

The thing is, i texted the FWB today to wish her a happy birthday, and i didn’t get a reply which is just a shame. I mean, she’s probably having fun, so can’t blame her really. But i have got to mention the fact that I’m abandoning the idea of getting into her polycule. Like, yeah, it would’ve been nice, and that week i stayed with her was great and felt like a real thing, but I’m 90% sure that’s because we were both Incredibly Touch Starved after isolation. Like, I’m still at that point, but I haven’t felt like I wanted to long distance fuck around with her anytime recently. I do want to mention this. I’ve reconnected with somebody and I Really Think it’s going to work out for the better.

Agh.

But back to that whole thing. Just listening to him go on about something was nice. I didn’t think I’d like his voice, but i like his voice. It’s not the same as it was back when we used to talk, but there’s still that soft pitch to it that is, just now deeper and a whole lot easier to listen to. I’d let him talk my ear off for longer if there was time. I remember reading once “you know you’re in deep when you fall for their voice” and yeah. Yeah, you do. Hell, the other night we got into another one of those more personal convos and something in me was like “yeah, I’d date him long term.” and i just went into this thing and drew an exact boundary that won’t freak me out which honestly allows so much more openness. Doesn’t stop him from replacing the L word with care though, but i can live with that and honestly, i really like that. Hm. I shouldn’t have looked away from the nerdy guy who was always tailing behind me back then. I mean, we started onto this thing about something in 10th grade and he just went “HANG ON.” and whipped out this half-finished yearbook he had from that year because he was on the yearbook team. Halfway through he just showed me the pic he had in there saying something about how pissed he looked, and I agreed. But also I just start wondering why i didn’t find him attractive back then. He was cute. Ngl. He’s cute. I mean, yeah, i was usually dating somebody back then, but this would’ve been nice. So much nicer than the 10th grade ex. But really. Why wasn’t I attracted to him then, but I am now? Like, we’re talking the sweetest damn guy, 6 foot, he’s got this cute, soft face and I’m just ???? I could’ve dodged so many bullets with this one.

Maybe it’s just the new outlook. Like how back then something in me was like “I’m totally not one of these dweebs.” and how I’d go out of my way to talk to the worst possible people i could spend time with. People i met outside of school. The ones who dropped out. The ones who’d lead me into oddly dangerous spots and weird situations. I just used to like how chill and calm the ‘stoners’ were back then. They accepted everybody. They were kind. Until you looked under the surface and realized just how much trouble you get into around them. Welp, i learned my lesson there. The hard way. Maybe I should’ve listened when i heard that one had a police record at 16. And here i am suddenly wanting to be surrounded by my old group of nerdy friends where the worst situations we’d get into involved wandering out into the woods and reenacting scenes from our favorite books in places we totally shouldn’t have been.  But sadly everybody is scattered across the state at different colleges with different lives. One came out as gay and ghosted the rest of us (hell, he was the one who nearly lit my backyard on fire anyways. What’s weirder is all of us came out as queer a year prior.), another ended up in a huge city with new people and new jobs and just a new life, another manages a whole restaurant (props to him, that’s a feat), and then there’s me and this guy who just kind of fell into this slump and likely are going to be stuck in the old hometown for a while. 

Huh. Either way I think I’m going to be happy in this one. It’s not everyday i find somebody who can talk their way past my walls so easily and make me feel so safe. You know, tomorrow is new year’s. He’s not doing anything, and I’m likely going to have a couple beers. I might flirt a little harder tbh. I don’t want to get too ahead of myself being this far out, but my god, do i want to open this up Just A Little More. If i’ve got him down there saying that he cares so much about me and just wants me to be happy, well by god, I’m going to make him happy too.

Ha. I also threatened to get him to watch some horror movies together. Gonna do that at some point, definitely cuddle the hell out of him, and likely scar him for life with some freaky ass movie. Perfect date night tbh. And I didn’t even frame it as a date night. But that’s literally my plan.

i played re4 for the plot only

114 was so fucking bonkers. what the hell man

sevika making you wear a remote controlled vibrator so she can fuck with you while she plays cards this. sevika making you wear a remote controlled vibrator so she can fuck with you while she plays cards that. okay hear me out, sevika making you wear a wearable remote controlled dildo so she can actually fuck with you while she plays cards. thoughts?

Fuck it. Aroaces your Docm77.

ive had this bouncing around in my head for a while, so here we are.

i am a sucker for pretty boys with kind brown eyes and jaime fits that description perfectly...so i decided to give him a lot of pining (that is definitely reciprocated), he has to be a big brave boy and confess 🫶🏾 also, this is placed before the events in the movie !

inspired by

hanging out with jaime has always been very warm, cozy, comfortable. ever since you were children when you'd spend weekends riding your bikes around the neighborhood, only to crash at one of your houses after having way too much food. it happened so frequently that it got to the point where it just was the new normal for both of your families (impromptu get togethers were very common).

the friendship you guys had only grown stronger with each year that passed and well- there were definitely feelings there that weren't strictly platonic now. you were trying your hardest to push them away though, and jaime was having the same issues...however neither of you dared to even threathen the sanctity of the bond shared by confessing. that is until one summer came along, you guys had gone to different universities, and even though you called and texted daily, summer was when you guys could actually hang out like the old days. and here you were, having gone to pick up jaime from the airport with the rest of the reyes. as he walked through the gate you let his family say their hellos first- it's safe to say he almost drowned in hugs and kisses, and when you finally got to say hello you didn't hold back with the bear hug either.

you missed him dearly, and the weird feeling of anxiety, excitement and happiness settled in your stomach as he squeezed you back and actually just fully picking you up. it made the feeling in your stomach even stronger.

"JAIME DIOS MÍO BÁJAME"

"Que no, don't wanna"

"okay so if that's how this is gonna go, cárgame bien, señor"

suddenly you guys were in your own world, talking and laughing and everyone could clearly see what was happening here. milagro was gonna have a field day with the teasing as soon as she had a chance. he ended up putting you down- but only after he carried you all the way to the car. it was embarrassing yes, but now as embarrassing as the older couple that chuckled as you walked past and talked to themselves in hushed voices about 'how sweet young love is' and how they wished they could go back in time and experience it all over again.

that got you both blushing...and made the drive back home for lunch a bit...strange. nothing really changed, you still sat together and chatted, but jaime couldn't stop thinking about what they had said. did you guys actually look like a couple? should he had said something to them? the fact that he didn't mind if they thought so made him feel warm and fuzzy.

two weeks pass, and while you've somehow managed to push away those fuzzy feelings, things have definitely flipped for jaime- and milagro did not help one bit. she woke up much earlier than he did, you did too, and it usually meant that as soon as he walked out into the kitchen he'd see you just having breakfast.

"buenas morning" you say, trying not to laugh cause his hair looked bonkers, but even if you found it hilarious, it was still endearing, and the fuzzy feelings you had to fight every single day before meeting him were back and they were looking for vengeance. and when he almost put his full body weight on top of you for a hug not caring that you were in the middle of eating? well, you felt like you were going to die. "mornin...." he didn't move off. "jaime." "Hmmm?" "get off of me and go shower, tenemos que encontrarnos con el grupo in like an hour". with one last, extremely dramatic sigh, he moves off and does as told. it's not like he didn't want to spend the day with you and some of your other friends, they were his friends too, but he would much rather stay in and chill.

not even two hours later and you guys are at the little picnic area everyone agreed to meet up at, playing silly games, chatting and just catching up! and jaime just wasn't feeling it, he couldn't really pinpoint the reason why until he sees how talkative and close you are with one of the guys there. okay. that's fine. it's just a hangout, nothing is happening, you definitely aren't flirting with him. thank god someone called the guy over cause he didn't know how much he could take.

"so how'd the flirting go?" he thought he sounded casual, calm, normal. he did not sound casual, calm or normal. he sounded upset and looked like a sad dog. "what flirting- what the hell happened to you? why do you look so sad? ¿qué pasó?" "hm? nothing." he shook his head, making you squint. okay, if he didn't want to tell you, then you'd just come up with absurd reasons as to why he would be upset. "¿tas celoso?" funny how you got it right first try. you don't know that, though. "what? no- ¿qué?" he prays to god the blush creeping up his neck isn't noticeable, prays it doesn't betray him. "Ayyyyy si es eso you don't have to be, tu sabes que you're irreplaceable" you laugh and god is definitely on his side cause you're called over a few second later by someone of the order people and he can feel his heart beating so fast he fears its gonna burst through his chest.

the hangout went by smoothly, he genuinely couldn't be happier, even if at first he didn't want to be there. he has to admit, he did miss his friends, so he's glad he could spend some time with them. now you guys are laying on his bed, chismeando and just debriefing when the topic of him being "jelous" came up again. maybe he could just do it. he knew it was risky, but....he was willing to take the chance. "....you know what? maybe i was. maybe i was very jelous, maybe i still kind-of am." he felt you sitting up and all he could do was pull a pillow over his face and keep this shit rolling "you've always made me feel so comfortable and...warm, and ive always loved you, but at some point i think it turned into love...? does that make sense- no- it's fine- okay- look i just- de verdad que me gustas mucho y pues no sé- i don't wanna fuck this up aunque creo que ya lo jodí-" he huffs and sits up to face you, looking embarrassed and flustered "you're so special to me and i really don't want to mess up the friendship we have, okay? but i'd just...i'd really like to be yours."

you aren't sure if you should just kiss him or shake him by the shoulders. so you settle for taking his hand in yours, feeling your face grow warmer- if that's even possible after that confession. "jaime, look at me." that boy is holding onto the pillow for dear life, using it to still obscure his face while he shakes his head. he's trembling. you use your other hand to grab his face and look at you "please, just kiss me" "really?" "si-" and he does, like he's been starving. he almost doesn't let you pull back even though you both need to breathe. "jaime mi amor, you will always be my favorite pretty boy and im so happy i can finally tell you."

me in 2014: thinking about sherlock and john

me in 2024: thinking about sherlock and john (podcast edition)

Episode 56 of HxH. High-key love the moment when Gon asks chrollo how he can kill people who he doesn't know and chrollos response is to have a philosophical micro meltdown and leave without answering. He's so real for that. As far as shonen villains go, this guy's kinda fun

it’s Kiyazan anniversary!! Well, it is an hour before midnight so technically it’s tomorrow BUT that matters not the entire world must know now, immediately, ab the reason @cashweasel and I have moved to the goofy pool

Got my first meeting with a psychiatrist in over a year since the last one demanded details about trauma when I was visibly sweating and shaking! Let’s hope today goes much better and that I have the prefrontal cortex online enough to leave if necessary instead of tolerating that kind of thing again

Actually im going to develop on my "Alejandro and Izzy friendship" HCs

they (hint: Alejandro) would be so awkward around eachother at first because Ale's trying to figure her out and see if he can take advantage of it but it's Izzy and Izzy is wacky as shit and has clocked him IMMEDIATELY (as what? i'll let you decide!) and knows he's not being genuine like ever. and she wants to know what's up with that guy.

He would not realise he's befriending her, or that he would consider her a friend until it's too late and he's let her drag him into pranking Duncan or whatever and he finds that he doesn't really care.

They both soooo have vulnerability issues up the wazoo it's crazy. They'd need character developpement for it to work out in the end but if it does it would be so wacky. fuck it Noah Izzy and Alejandro scheming. The only thing preventing them taking over the fucking world is Heather not being there with them (and Noah's too lazy to go through with it)

mondstadt couldnt handle one ethically skewed witch.how are they gonna handle end game all hexenzirkel oh dear

i don't know what timezone you're in (or whether your sleep schedule follows it, hell knows i barely do) but i always try to make an effort to check in with mutuals every now and then and i haven't yet with you so far! so i hope your week is going well thus far ^^

ooh hallo!! thank you very much for stopping by!! my week is going very well i think, lets see.... i went on a very lovely walk recently and got some new scalpels and another sketchbook since i filled all of the previous ones. which reminds me i still have some drawings i need to work on. i hope your week is going well also!!

GOD. OKAY—

I’ve legitimately been thinking myself into a downward spiral for the last 3 hours straight about how not enough people give Hatoful Boyfriend a fighting chance long enough to ever get through the full game.

It shouldn’t bother me so much, but it REALLY bugs me whenever I see a Big YouTuber™️ pick up the game on their channel for shits and giggles (because “haha silly bird dating game”) and then only do one or two of the routes before dropping it and never touching it again with the assumption that the entire game is just one big meme when there’s SO MUCH MORE to see. But it’s so hard to convince people to actually stick with it and play through the whole thing without spoiling everything about it and all its twists and turns.

Like it’s seriously one of the best games I’ve EVER played with amazing storytelling, character development, horror, humor, and literally everything in-between but nO ONE EVER KNOWS BECAUSE THEY DON’T EVER MAKE IT PAST THE PUDDING GOD JOKE ROUTE.

Gonna sound like a broken record, but with the resurfacing of trolls (on twt) trying to bully Hakyeon out of the group and the other side scrambling to defend him, i need to rant once again and say: while i absolutely do not condone troll behaviour, i need yall to stop acting like hakyeon is the only member with a successful career outside of vixx. When in fact he's the only one whose solo career yall care about and is admittedly more accessible to most ppl, unlike musical which only a very small group of fans will ever get to experience.

Taek and jaehwan have been doing musicals way before vixx went into a hiatus, and hyuk has ad.a now and it's clear that he's going to be very successful.

Jaehwan opened up about how difficult it was on his body and how his vocals weren't in a good condition BECAUSE he was doing a musical when they were doing comeback preparations and album recording during thr documentary. Taek was doing the mv on no sleep. Hyuk was involved in the directing and creative process of the album while also being the subject.

So I do not think it's unreasonable or even unfair to ask hakyeon to be honest with; 1st himself, and 2nd with the fans. Because over the last 4 (?) Years since he was released from the military and changed labels, he has not shown up for vixx (once in a blue moon where there was anything to show up for) when it mattered. If showing support and promoting them on social media is all he can do, he can do that whether he's officially in or out of the group.

Bottom line is: i respect that he's taking his acting career seriously and I'm proud of his achievements so far, however, he needs to be honest about where his priorities truly are. It's not fair to fans or leohyuken when he insists he's part of the group and cares about it but never actually shows up for activities. It's his words vs his actions, and it hurts people.

juan ruiz i need to give you so many smooches and tell you how much of a good boy you are bc you really are one of the best boys :')