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ivanaily · 1 year

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Sunny Suljic BAFTAS 2023

| 800 ISO | 1/60 Shutter | EXP +1.0 |

#sunny suljic #sunnysuljic #illegal civ #baftas #atreus #god of war

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isiahxcardenas · 2 years

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alexa demie behind the scenes of mid90s

#alexa demie #euphoria #euphoria hbo #maddy perez #maddy euphoria #mid90s #90s style #90s nostalgia #illegal civ #sunny suljic

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horriblehs · 2 years

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fourth grade is my boyf

#I literally have loved this man since before I had a Tumblr acc #fourth grade #mid90s #illegal civ

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jarjarblinks · 2 years

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i mean he just dont give us time to BREAVe

i cant BREAVE

happy annual holy fucking shit nak is hot day

#would risk it all #oops #its NAKEL SMITH #nakel smith #illegal civ #illegal civilization #bi girl

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zingingqt · 1 year

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#earl sweatshirt #illegal civ #ofwgkta

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ivanaily · 1 year

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A bunch of Sunny Suljic gifs I made from the Illegal Civ YT channel (and other sources)

#sunny suljic #illegal civ #illegal civilization #skaterboy #skateboarding

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autogyne-redacted · 8 months

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what’s wrong with building codes?

Ok fair, this isn't a line of critique ppl talk about much and probably isn't intuitive from lots of positions.

But they're a fundamental piece of how capitalism (tries to) force us to play its game and of how it destroys alternative lifeways!

Also worth noting that nearly all traditional indigenous dwellings are gonna be illegal by most building codes. That alone should make you real skeptical of them.

For most of human history, in most places, people could build dwellings at the individual or small group level out of readily available, natural materials. (Eg from what I've read 1-2 people can build a wigwam in 3 days that'll last well over a year).

This kind of set up gives individuals way more power over their housing and isn't conducive to landlording or housing debt. Readily available housing means way less pressure to stay with shitty family/housemates/partners/jobs. It removes one of the primary forms of leverage.

Building codes make it difficult or fully illegal to live in anything other than a modern, conventional home.*

///

Modern homes are convenient in tons of ways. But:

Older tech gets portrayed as way worse than it was, and:

A lot of that convenience primarily matters if you're spending most of your time/energy working because you're living thoroughly inside the market and if you're separated from the skills and knowledge to take care of your shit without modern conveniences.

Civ has a gravity to it. You (theoretically/legally) have to pay a certain amount in taxes, at the point at which you're working a little, probably you find at least some things you want to buy. As you work more you handle less shit yourself and pay more so other people handle it for you. As more people are doing this community becomes harder and harder to find if you're holding out. And the skills, knowledge and lifeways for living outside of civ are harder to access.

While mass violence is needed at times, that's not needed or sustainable long term.

With the commons enclosed, the genocide and forced relocation of indigenous people enacted, industrialization and urbanization complete, more mundane and bureaucratic forms of coercion tend to do the trick for the few hold outs and breakaways.

Shit like telling you you have to install a septic system you can't begin to afford, or condemning your house.

*while the details of what's allowed and what's prohibited vary massively from place to place, it is a practical tension I and friends come up against with the state, and even if it wasn't I think it makes sense to object on principle/with an eye towards the future.

Child custody standards (what's grounds for the state taking your kid/what's gonna count against you in a custody battle) often go above and beyond building codes in requiring normative dwellings.

I'm thinking of details like: septic/sewer standards, requiring electric/water hookups, requiring buildings made to last decades vs easy to build structures that are rebuilt every few years or require more active maintenance, making it difficult or impossible to use natural materials, etc.

Qualifier: I think building codes serve a purpose in landlord-tennant relationships but without them it'd be way easier to escape renting

#anti-civ #theory #writing #none of this is about me #obviously since i would never break any laws #thanks for the ask!!

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handageddon · 11 months

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Hello to the anti civ tumblr I accidentally accused of unabomber memeing. Not sure why you followed me. But I'll have you know I participate in the anti civ activity of letting plantains grow freely on my lawn, which is technically illegal here, because I like that they have purple flowers

#i cant eat them because the property behind me is most likely loaded with copper pesticides to keep the mint at bay #but also like #purple #broadleaf plantains are lamiales similar to mints #not like bananas

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killed-by-choice · 1 year

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Margaret Louise Smith, 25 (USA 1971)

When New York legalized abortion on demand, the results were catastrophic. People from across the country were lured by the abortion industry and persuaded to undergo the deadly procedure. One of many killed by early legalized abortion was Margaret Smith.

Margaret Louise Smith was 25 when she was exposed to the rubella virus, also known as German measles. Afraid of the effects that the virus may have had on her baby, she left her home in Michigan and came to New York.

Infamous abortionist Jesse Ketchum had a criminal career selling illegal abortions for quite some time before New York legalized them. He then went to Buffalo, where he was allowed to endanger women without as much fear of legal consequences.

Ketchum performed a vaginal hysterotomy on Margaret at 10:30 A.M. on June 16, 1971. This method was perfectly legal, but had an especially high maternal mortality rate. Margaret was left almost entirely unattended until 2:00 P.M. when her boyfriend Billy Ray Ellenburg found her unresponsive. He begged Ketchum and his staff to do something until someone finally called the paramedics.

Margaret was finally taken to the hospital that was just across the street, but she was declared dead on arrival. Her autopsy showed that Ketchum had lacerated her uterus and her cervix before leaving her unmonitored, causing her to bleed to death.

Margaret’s parents sued for $350,000 and Ketchum was charged with criminally negligent homicide. Until his case went to trial, he continued his career as an abortionist and killed Carole Schaner in a strikingly similar way only four months later.

Tonawanda News “Abortion MD surrenders for jail term”

Traverse City Record-Eagle, November 1, 1974

US District Court, Western New York, Ketchum v. Ward, No. Civ-75-79, 422 F. Supp. 934 (1976)

#tw abortion #pro life #unsafe yet legal #tw murder #tw ab*rtion #abortion #abortion debate #death from legal abortion #tw blo0d #pre roe legal

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cat-esper · 1 month

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PALADIN | Adrianos, Quincy, Marr, and Reaver

He had dark hair, neatly groomed, and broad shoulders. He wore a shirt and tie, slacks, and a brown jacket, polished shoes. He reminded Chelsea of the math teacher she'd had in Junior High, the one everyone secretly feared. No one ever cheated in his class. Only her teacher never carried a knife at his belt. "Adrianos Nephus, you are under arrest," Ferric called across the hangar. Adrianos Nephus. The man who ran the Syndicate. Even without Ferric's confirmation, she thought she knew. "You haven't the authority for that, I'm afraid," Adrianos said. His voice was smooth and bitter. "Run now and I may just forget this little interference."

Name: Adrianos Nephus

Birthday: September 12, 1973

Age: 51

Home: Chicago, Illinois; Earth

Personality Type: ESTJ-A

Cunning and ruthless, Adrianos founded the Syndicate in his home city of Chicago where he made his money through the sale of illegal drugs and weapons. But even becoming a wealthy crime boss wasn't enough to satisfy his ambition so when he discovered a portal to another world, what he saw was an opportunity to expand his empire.

This has led to him influencing the outcomes of various conflicts in the Big Civ as well as making powerful enemies. But he's a man who believes in maintaining power and control and he's willing to do anything to get it, even if it means sacrificing his own family for it.

"You'll want to watch yourselves," Quincy said. "Arla Swin may have been running the show on Autolk, but Adrianos Nephus is the one calling the shots. And you do not want him as an enemy. I recommend you back off." Shay's expression hardened just a little as if he recognized the name. "You'll never get the full picture from a guy like me," Quincy said. "He knows better than that." Shay grunted and backed away from the table. "In that case, we'll just keep you here a while. They won't miss you." He opened the door, nodding for Chelsea to go through first. "Oh, and you're wrong about what you said. Adrianos Nephus doesn't want me as an enemy."

Name: Quincy Reid

Birthday: May 22, 1990

Age: 34

Home: Sable, Utah; Earth

Personality Type: ESTP-T

Quincy is very much a product of his environment. He ran with the wrong crowd, made the wrong decisions, and simply ended up in the wrong place at the wrong time. Growing up, he idolized his brother, who himself wasn't a great influence, and he has a tendency to give in to peer pressure. When his brother started a family and attempted to get his life together, Quincy felt left behind and betrayed, which was how Adrianos found him and how he ended up working for the Syndicate.

More concerned with just keeping his head down and doing what he's told, Quincy is content to stay within this comfort zone. But as circumstances change, he'll have to decide whether to stick with it or try and repair his damaged but not permanently broken moral compass.

"You are too late. You have lost. The dragons are being returned home," Voh said, much too brave considering the circumstances. Chelsea wished she were half that brave. "This isn't about the dragons," Marr said. "It's about you now. You're a loose end and Nephus doesn't like loose ends." He adjusted the black gloves on his hands, casually. "So you're just going to kill us?" Chelsea asked. Marr pressed a button on something strapped to his wrist. "That's the plan."

Name: Marr

Birthday: January 18, 1981

Age: 43

Home: Hnavah

Personality Type: ISTJ-A

Having grown up in the blood dens of Hnavah, Marr learned from an early age that the only way to the top is by destroying the competition. To gain his patron's favor--and the food and protection that comes with it--Marr built himself into someone to be feared, someone brutal and merciless and not worth crossing. It served him well on Hnavah and when he finally escaped the cesspit that is the Hvroivian homeworld, that brutality was the only skill he had.

Adrianos hired him to work for the Syndicate specifically for this skill, which he puts to use against Adrianos' enemies. It's earned him a fearsome reputation which is just fine by him. As long as he is something to fear, he will always be safe.

"It's in our heads," Reaver said simply. "Whatever it showed Quincy was to the south and made him want to run away from it. What I'm seeing now is to the north and I'm compelled to approach it." "What do you see?" "It's..." Reaver hesitated. "Just someone I failed to protect. It doesn't matter. It's not real. I suggest we veer south." Chelsea looked where Reaver's gun was pointing but saw nothing. Marr looked too and fired a shot in that direction. "You won't hit it," Reaver said. "Just keep going."

Name: Reaver 20-309

Birthday: June 30, 1987

Age: 37

Home: N/A

Personality Type: ISTJ-T

Reaver model synths were designed and mass-produced for war. Reaver 20-309 served in several conflicts as a sniper. Like all Reavers, he was designed with minimal empathy and excellent situational awareness as well as strength, quick reflexes, and a number of combat styles. Considered dangerous to the general public, it is necessary to destroy Reavers once they are no longer needed. However, Reaver 20-309 was instead stolen and sold on the black market which is how he ended up in the Syndicate.

He knows he's not a person, but a tool and does Adrianos' dirty work because that was how he was programmed to be. He absolutely cannot allow himself to feel for any of the Syndicate's victims and he especially cannot consider any of them friends.

#oc: adrianos nephus #oc: quincy reid #oc: marr #oc: reaver 20-309 #the last paladin #writeblr #writing #character intro

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cowgirlcherrie · 9 months

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FR even low rise jeans are getting so expensive again. i will forever blame the rich

YOU'RE SKATER? PERIOD YOU'RE AN ICON 'm terrible at it but I know how to roller skate!

(i'm sorry for the late reply! I failed a very important exam)

THIS !!! like ok I buy a lot of my fashionable clothes second hand so the minute I go on depop and I wanted low-rise jeans I got so upset BC why is it almost $70-100 for ONE PAIR that was definitely thrifted for $2 like am I crazy???? I honestly mind as well just thrift it myself!!

Not a good one baby! It was during my middle school years, and I wasn’t all that good but my friends were — I used to watch skate vids (thrasher mag channel, illegal civ on youtube, skate 3 compilations) but I love that you can roller-skate!!! thats so amazing that’s something I wanna learn amongst one of my many whimsical talents

Also don’t apologize my love!! I’m sorry that you didn’t pass but don’t beat yourself up over it! I have failed so many times and failed my french final and nearly cried bc I thought that I would have failed the class but she pushed my grade up bc my attendance was perfect

I say we share a victory slice of cake if you enjoy it ! (ɔ ˘⌣˘)˘⌣˘ c)♡

(btw do you want a name nonnie I refer to you as my purple anon hehe)

#cher 💌 answers #cutie angel #💭ᜊ cher thinks

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musingsinmountains · 1 year

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Masquerade Chapter 3

Synopsis: Your name is Keisuke Baji and it's your third year of studying veterinary medicine in college. Now that the semester is almost over, you’re in danger of losing your scholarship because of your chemistry lab. You may be a pretty smart guy, but that’s not gonna save you. Maybe your lab partner can (even if she’s a bitchy nerd)? Maybe the extra credit you’re gonna get for going to the fine arts festival to support one of your mysterious colleagues? Who knows what happens when the house lights go down and the curtain opens.

C/W: AFAB!Reader, making out, cursing, nicknames, suggestive themes, fluff, angst, College AU,

Pairing: Keisuke Baji x AFAB!Reader

Previous. Next

Chapter 3: Baji’s Distraction

That might have been the best night's sleep you ever had. A beautiful woman who checked everything off your list, giving you the most private show in your dreams. While you did awake well rested, you also woke up needing to take care of yourself. It was Siren in your seven o’clock in the morning fantasy that got you off. “F-fuck,” you grunted, heat surging in your blood. You grab a shirt from your clothes hamper to clean up with. With a stretch and several pops to your spine, you get ready for the day.

You hurriedly shower, change clothes, feed the cats, grab your breakfast of champions (an energy drink and a slice of dry toast), and grab your school bag. “See yah later ‘Fuyu!” you call out as your head to your bike. Luckily the traffic this early in the morning won't delay your arrival to campus. At least it's a short day, working with Mouse for a little bit, and then going to the show tonight. Your first class today is Asian Civilization at eight am. Then you have an hour break before Technical Writing at ten, followed by Chemistry at 11.

Lecture was easier for you to sit through, especially with the note guide that was handed out today. Nine times out of ten, your professors have all the notes up on the board or provide a note guide/presentation for each class. Today’s Asian Civ lecture was all about the cultural revolution in China and dear god how your professor bird walked on that one. At least you got a good laugh out of that class. With all the tangents, the period went by real quick. So did your break and writing class. You make your way from the lecture hall in the library to the science building. When you made it to the lecture hall where chemistry was, you saw Mouse at her seat. If you weren’t mistaken, she put on makeup today. You approach her with caution, it's not often that she looks like a regular girl and not a bog witch.

“Mornin’ Mousey,” you yawn. Your caffeine high was fading and you felt like you were gonna crash, “You look normal today.” She’s wearing jeans and an off shoulder peasant top.You dont see any sort of strap, which makes you wonder if she's wearing any sort of bra. Your eyes dart away from her, hoping she doesn't catch on.

“Isn’t it a tad early for backhanded compliments?” she asks, looking at you with a content smirk on her face. She returns her look to her notebook, jotting down the almost insane and illegible scribbles from the board.

Your face scrunches and you sit next to her, “I’m trying t’be nice.” Professor Sato quietly entered the hall and all voices quieted. Today, the lecture was the start of the review for the midterm next week. Part way through the lecture, you feel your phone vibrate.

‘Fuyu: Yo, you left a book and a bunch of papers on the table.

An odd text to get but you feel in your bag and sure enough, you left a book at home. And it was the book you were gonna need for working with your lab partner. “Fuck,” you mutter, causing Mouse to glance at you as you text

KB: Fuck. I need that book. I’m fucked. ‘Fuyu: Sorry man, I can’t bring it to you. I’m at work.

“What’s wrong?” Mouse whispers as she nudges your arm with hers.

“Don’t wanna talk about it now,” the tension in your voice was palpable. You were disappointed with yourself. It's not like you were even running late today, but you were on auto pilot. You really gotta remember to put reminders into your phone.

“Ooh,’ she breathed, “well we can talk about it after class.” She sounded so calm and relaxed. It was nice seeing this side of her. You gently tap your face to keep awake as you continue filling out your notes. The hour that Professor Sato took for the lecture today was long. You’d catch yourself daydreaming of the Siren, seeing her up there lecturing you on molecular bonding.That helped time pass faster.

“Alright class,” Professor Sato began her closing statement, “I will email you a review worksheet with problems that correspond to today’s notes. They are due at our next lecture session. Dismissed” The room cleared in an instant, even the professor left quickly. Soon it was just you and Mouse, heading out together.

“So what happened?” she looked at you with her head, cocked to the side.

“I left all my lab stuff in the kitchen at home. I wasn’t even running late and I forgot it,” You didn't look at her.

“Oh,” she pushed her glasses up, “That's not that bad, why not go get them?”

“I have to come back to campus later and I don't want to do that much riding,” you shrug.

“Riding?”

“I have a motorcycle.”

“That's pretty cool,” she smiles, her dusty rose lips slightly parting, “We can’t do anything without your book. I could pay you for gas. I also have to be back here later tonight. We could just go back to your place and either work there or get it and come back.”

“Okay, Food first though,” you gesture with your head towards the cafeteria. There were a few odd glances as you and your lab partner headed into the cafeteria. You go your separate ways to the various counters to make choices and then meet up again at the drink station. “Where d’ya wanna sit?”

“I saw that the garden room was open. How about there?” She smiles, her volume is at a normal level and she's not screaming at you. The two of you find a high table in the garden room. The atrium was warm and had large plants, obscuring the view of your seats. For what seems like forever, the two of you eat in silence. It wasn’t until she let out a very controlled sigh that anything was said. “So what time do you have to be back on campus,” she inquired.

“I have to be back in time for the fine arts festival event,” you say, swallowing your mouthful of noodles, “So sometime between five and five fifteen. I want a good seat at the showcase.” You notice her eyes widened and she swallowed hard, like she was choking on her lunch.

“Oh,” she breathed, “I have a study group at five fifteen. So if we went back to your place, we could work through maybe a quarter of our reports.” She’s just staring at her tray, moving her salad around her plate. It’s almost like she's nervous about possibly being in someone else's home.

“That works for me,” you move your head to get into her line of vision and give her a sincere smile, “I’ll text my buds and let them know you’re comin’ home with me”. You tap away on your cell, sending a message to the roommate chat. Kazutora and Chifuyu text you back real quick with thumbs up emojis. You both continue eating in silence. At one point you look up from your lunch and notice her swaying rhythmically. “They’re okay with it. We can head out whenever.”

She grins, “Sweet. Let’s roll.” She’s quick to clean her seat up and grab her bag. You follow suit and you walk out to where you parked your bike. You hand her your helmet. “Thanks,” she said, clipping the strap under her chin. You took your seat and motioned to where you wanted her to sit. She gets on and tightly wraps her arms around your waist. You can feel your heart race. It wasn’t the first time you had a woman on your bike, but it was the first time that having someone hold themself so close to you. You take just a moment to try to slow your pulse back to normal, then you’re off. Your lab partner is holding you just tight enough that you can feel her laughing and you're pretty sure she squealed with glee. Mental note, ask her if this was her first ride. Having a passenger with you always makes the ride feel not as long. Especially when there is light traffic.

“We’re here,” you say slowly pulling into your parking spot. She hands you the helmet and she's got this huge smile on her face. “Was that your first time on a motorcycle?”

“Yeah,” She’s messing with her hair, finger combing out the tangles from the wind. “That is exhilarating. What a rush”. Her pupils are dilated and her breathing is slightly labored. You motion for her to follow you up to the next floor. You usher her into your apartment and lead her to the kitchen, where the table (and your lab book) were.

“Ya want anything to drink?” You grab two glasses of water and head back to the table, offering her one. She accepts it graciously as you sit down, pulling out your notebooks and laptop. “I’m gonna set an alarm for four forty five. It’ll take us ‘bout half an hour to get back to campus”. She nods and sets up her laptop. The two of you start in on the revisions to the first lab report of the semester. The conversation is very academic but you feel like looking back on these reports that you are able to understand it better than you did. And she’s being so… sweet? Maybe that's not the right word, but it feels sweet to you. You work on edits and show them to her. She gives you pointers on where to improve your wording. By the time your alarm goes off, the two of you are one report short of being a quarter of the way done with the reports. You put your things in your room before grabbing a bunch of snacks.

“We did some great work,” she smiles at you as she’s learning in the door frame of the kitchen sending a text message while you pack up for your return to campus. She looks content, relaxed, and so much more human. Up until today, you would have thought she was just like Professor Sato; cold, calculated, robotic.

“Yeah,” you reply, locking eyes with her. She smiles at you, fidgeting at her shirt’s hem. Your face feels warm, causing you to shake yourself out of blankly staring at her collar bones. “We should head out. The ride to campus will take us about half an hour.” You motion towards the door with your head. Your newly formed duo headed out the door, down to your bike. She grabs the helmet, secures it in place, and takes her seat behind you. Her grip on your waist isn’t as tight as the first ride, but she still closes the gap between your bodies. You can feel your stomach fill with butterflies, the intensity of this feeling grew with each minute you felt her body against yours. There is a pang of guilt for having these feelings when you know she’s holding on for safety. It is for safety right?

This time, your return to campus was quick, taking only fifteen minutes. The road was literally clear of ninety percent of vehicles. When you finally pull into the motorcycle space at the fine arts building, you feel a little sick. Who wouldn’t after having intense butterflies in their stomach for fifteen minutes. You dismount your bike and offer her a hand, which she accepts. “Thanks,” she quietly breathes, “Do you have Paypal? I’ll wire you some gas money.” She hands you her phone for you to input your info. You do so quickly, but reluctantly, and hand her phone back.

“You didn’t have to,” you shrug.

“I’m a woman of my word,” she says, “Let me repay your kindness, you didn't have to give me a round trip ride.” The silence between you feels odd, you wanted to reach out and touch her shoulder. Then you hear another voice.

“HEY MOUSEY!” It was some guy, calling out to her and jogging to meet the two of you. “Hey, we gotta get to study group.” You felt a twinge of jealousy as he grabbed her by the hand and pulled her away.

“I’ll text you,” she yelled as she was pulled around the corner. You manage a faint wave just barely raising your hand. Something felt off about this, but you didn’t question it further. It was still light out and the weather was nice, so you decided to walk over to the quad to eat your snack dinner. You pick a nice sakura tree to sit against while you eat. It had a great view of the reflective pond. Time passes slowly and you finish just in time to trek back to the art building to go get your seat.

Tonight the performance space is a little brighter, very much resembling that of a stage production. You found your way to the seat you had yesterday. Hell yeah, best seat in the house.The handout for tonight says that tonight is about ensembles, duets, trios, and so on. This should be interesting, you think flipping through to where you see Siren pictured. The first page you see her on is a recreation of the poster from Wicked with the one they are calling Butterfly. Looks like she's portraying the evil one. The notes on the page talk about the song choice, what it means to the singers. A few pages later there is a two page spread featuring Siren, Pomme, Fox, and Lizard. They were featured in a quartet exclusively found in the stage production of The Little Mermaid. Again, interesting. I’m guessing she's the mermaid.

The house lights flicker and you settle in for an evening. You shut off all sound on your phone just as the MC girl came onto the stage for the welcome spiel and to let the audience know that order for tonight would be the same for both . Siren’s first performance tonight was right before the intermission. You sat through plenty of performances from RENT, Sweeny Todd, Little Women, and Hamilton. They were good, but maybe the acting could have been better. What do you know? You are certainly NOT the type to be up there on stage. Could you hold a tune if you tried? Maybe, but it would be a stretch.

The MC girl came out to start the transition from Cabinet Battle #1 to For Good. Siren and Butterfly found their positions on the stage. The intro began, “I’m limited, just look at me,” Siren gestures to her whole self, looking out at the audience before turning slightly to Butterfly. “I’m limited, and just look at you. You can do all I couldn't do, Glinda,” she takes a step back, “So now it’s up to you, for both of us. Now it’s up to you”. She glides to mid stage, met by Butterfly. Siren takes Butterfly’s hands. Then the Butterfly starts her verse and her chorus. Her gestures are soft and flowing like water.

When Siren comes back in, the verse is full of emotion. It feels like she’s truly preparing to go into hiding. Siren goes into her chorus and your breath catches in your throat. Suddenly the two women’s voices come together for a line. Their voices are powerful and continue to grow as their lyrics move apart and come back, blending their choruses into what resembles a call and response moment. There is a dissonance that just pulls the lyrics together, and you feel a chill move down your spine. The women continue to sing together, trading off lines and coming back to unison until the song ends. “Because I knew you, I have been changed, For good”. As they let the last note go, Siren pulls her hood up and “flees” into the shadows just off stage. When applause begins, Siren and Butterfly come together, join hands, and take a simultaneous bow. Once again, the MC girl comes out to announce the intermission. Ten minutes to stretch, grab a drink of water and write a couple notes for your paper.

While you are enjoying a drink of water from the fountain, you decide to text your lab partner.

KB: Hey Mouse, Thanks for working with me today. KB: When’s your next break where we can work on the next set of reports? KB: It was nice hangin’ out with ya today.

You don’t normally send that many in a row, but getting your thoughts to where they were coherent was difficult tonight. You lock your phone quickly as you head back to your seat. The MC returns and welcomes everyone back from the intermission.Then the next set of ensembles start. They’re good, but not what you wanted to hear. You did watch them and applaud them, but they were ultimately forgettable. Only when the MC came out for the final time, you were snapped back to the current reality. “Thank you for coming! Without further delay, our final number, If Only performed by Siren, Fox, Pomme, and Lizard”. The MC seemed to poof away from the stage as four singers came out and became statue-esque. You notice that Siren is towards the middle of the left hand side of the stage. Soft warbles of woodwinds cue the first entrance.

And just as you predicted, it’s Siren playing the mermaid. Fitting considering the creature she chose as her moniker. Her voice is ethereal and you feel those butterflies come back to your stomach followed by the hair on the back of your neck standing on end. “It’s in my ev’ry glance, my heart’s and open book. You’d see it all at once, if only you would look.” She looks right at you, there is no mistaking it. You can feel a deep heat engulf your body as you hold her gaze through the phrase she’s singing. The one called Pomme comes in as the Prince. His lyrics seem to speak to you, make you think about Siren and oddly Mouse. Then Siren comes back in, “If only you would notice how I ache behind my smile,” Her eyes glittered in the light. Just as this mini-duet began, the voice of Lizard came in as the crab. Lastly, the one called Fox comes in as what you think is the mermaid's father.

At the end of the song, there is a haunting cacophony of these mixed voices; rising, falling, echoing, reaching out. It’s emotional and you feel it. You can feel the hurt, love, confusion, and ache of wanting to be seen. None of the other performances moved you like this, to tears. You weren’t the guy who would burst out in tears by listening to music. You decided to ignore the tears running down your face. As their final notes disappear into the walls, you are staring at her and how she's looking up into the rafters of the theater. Out of the corner of your eye, you see the entire theater is standing around you. You join them as the MC comes out, “Two nights in a row our final act has received a standing ovation. All performers will be in the lobby following their exit from the stage. Feel free to come talk to your faves.”

That was an invitation and you didn't know if you should go say something to her. What would you even say? It would be disrespectful to comment on her appearance or would she want to hear that you appreciate her costume choice. But would you want to tell her that she made you cry? How many opportunities would you get to talk to her before her identity is revealed? You grab your bag and file out of the theater. The lobby was crowded with audience members talking to the various acts. The dark silhouette of Siren caught your eye. She was standing with the guy in red, named Pomme, with his arm wrapped around her waist. You can feel your pulse quicken and you feel shaky as you approach them. “Uh, Hi,” you manage to choke out.

“Hi,” she smiled. Her voice was sultry and silky, like chocolate. “Thanks for coming tonight.” She extends her hand to you.

“The pleasure is mine,” you breathe and you gently shake her soft hand, “I’ve never been moved to tears by music before. That last song was an emotional roller coaster.” You could feel heat rise into your cheeks.

“I think I know what you're getting at. I love that you could appreciate it.” Her lips curled around the words and you were mesmerized.

“I saw you at yesterday's show,” Pomme interjected. His voice sounded like the ocean. “Thank you for supporting us.” You watch as he holds Siren’s waist tighter.

“I can tell there is a lot of hard work being put on display,” you respond looking him in the eye. You hate small talk. Shifting your gaze back to Siren, the fluttering in your stomach is almost too much to bear, “It was nice to meet you. Thanks again.” You turn on your heel and head out to your bike. The cool of the night helped settle your stomach. After a quick check of your phone, you text your roommates to let them know you’re on your way home. Still no reply from Mouse.

Kazutora meets you in the parking lot when you get back to the apartment. “Dude, you look like crap. What happened?”

“Nothing, just a good show,” you playfully punch his shoulder and head up to the apartment. Tonight, you make sure all your books are in your bag. As you are about to call it a night, your phone lights up.

Mousey: Sorry I got pulled away. Mako is very type A. It was nice hanging with you too. I’m busy all day tomorrow but we could get lunch after class tomorrow and then repeat our work session the day after. Mousey: I’ll bring us lunch. Maybe we could go back to your place to work?

Seeing her respond to you makes you smile and your pulse quickens. Almost exactly as it did when your thoughts turned to Mouse during the final number at the concert.

KB: Yeah, that was a little weird. Figured it was important. KB: That sounds great. See yah tomorrow. Mousey: Great. Have a good night :3 KB: Night.

You fall asleep thinking of your lab partner.

Dividers by @benkeibear

© All works belong to musingsinmountains. Please do not pirate my work onto other platforms. Support my releases with likes or reblogs on Tumblr and Kudos on AO3. Please support the official release of Tokyo Revengers

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