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#i'm just gonna do one for each of my three
miguelhugger2099 · 2 days
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Just a silly little request👉👈
Do u think fem!reader likes to wear crop top with no bra and Miguel's boxer. You two are just flirting and teasing each other until Miguel decided to toss the remote to reader for movie night and reflex, she tries to catch it reveal her tits and Miguel just "😳... Nice catch..." And smut if u want. Having his hands speezing them I'm going insane 😭😭
Just One Touch
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a/n: this ask has been in my inbox for so long and ur not gonna believe what got me out of my month long stump to write this. everyone thank sir-mix-a-lot's song "ride" it possessed me and gave me energy. excuse the crappy writing, i'm still lowk having writers block so it's not my greatest work. please enjoy and as alwayssss i can rewrite this if you'd like <3 Art: mar_mar0u on instagram ! Unedited btw, plz dont crucify me ill die :(
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It wasn’t unusual for you and Miguel to wind down after the sun had set. Movie night was a must, whether it was cheesy romcoms for you to sob to, horror movies for Miguel to be annoyed at, or even action movies to make fun of–as long as it was together. Still, Miguel teased you by holding the remote up above his head and out of your reach. He grins with one hand on his hip and watches you reach up with no progress in sight. “Give it!” You laugh, trying to keep your anger believable. “No, first you take my clothes and I know you’re gonna pick one of those creepy knock off animated movies.” He chuckles and he walks off. Due to the size difference, every step of his was three of yours–practically chasing after him. “Put respect on Over the Hedge’s name! It’s not even a knock off!” Miguel plops on the couch on one side with a huff of laughter. “Fine, fine. Here–take it!” He throws the remote above your head and you pause and stumble back.
You reach high up to grab the remote. “You asshole!” You laugh. The remote hits your fingertips and bounces a bit farther back. Your crop top rides and flows up as you lean back onto one foot to finally grasp the device in your hand.
Miguel could feel everything happen in slow motion. The small glimpse of your underboob before your nipples finally come into view. The grin on Miguel’s face slowly drops and he could feel drool slipping from his lips. He watched your boobs bounce, the roundness of your flesh and perky buds making his cheeks go red. He can’t help the disappointment in his face when your arms fall back down, shirt hiding the glorious view of your tits.
“Caught it!” You smirk at him triumphantly. His eyes continue to glance at your tits.  “Yeah, uh…” He gulps. “Nice catch.” He adjusts his shorts, hoping his growing bulge wasn’t too apparent.
You don’t notice, too engrossed in your victory and making Miguel speechless. So, you crawl in his lap, Miguel’s hands suspended in mid-air as you nestle yourself in his arms. You feel his muscles surround you like a warm comfortable blanket, leaning your back on his firm chest while you click the buttons to turn on the TV.
“So what are we picking this time?” You ask, flipping through random trailers to find what you’re looking for.
“Huh? Oh, uh, anything’s fine.” Miguel shrugs half-heartedly. He’s too focused looking down at your crop top. Slowly and gingerly, his fingers caress your stomach–light and feathery as if trying to be discreet.
“Yeah sure, whatever. Don’t complain if you don’t like it.” You laugh softly, clicking on a random movie that looked good enough.
“Mhm.” Miguel mumbles, not even hiding his disinterest in a damn movie right now. While your eyes are on the opening scene on the TV, Miguel’s eyebrows scrunch together, his lips into a tight line as he resists his urges.
He can’t help it though. He gets handsy, Miguel carefully caressing your stomach. You barely notice it since the two of you always get snuggled up like this.
You only notice when he hikes higher up, his hips shifting slightly while his fingers run up and down the valley of your tits. You smack his arm around your waist with the remote.
“What are you doing?” You ask, trying to sound annoyed but the smile seeps through your tone.
“Nuthin’” He murmurs. Miguel then feels the curve of your breast, his fingers itching for a squeeze.
“We’re supposed to be bonding.” You move to turn your head up at him. You try to meet his eyes but he stays glued downwards to your chest.
“We are.” Miguel insists, his lips slightly parted. His thumb swipes across your nipple and you gasp, feeling your cheeks burn. He can feel the nub perk up and his tongue darts out to lick his lips, biting his bottom lip to hide the satisfied smile on his face.
Miguel takes his chances, bending down to kiss along your neck, tugging you closer to him and making you melt. His body moves against yours and your eyes flutter shut. His mouth gently sucks and licks your skin and you shiver. Miguel grabs your left tit, the plump flesh squeezed in his palm. His fingers flick your nipple, circling around before gently twisting it.
You back arches and you moan. “Ah–fuck, Miguel!” You hissed, a burning heat crawling up your neck. Your hand lifts up to curl in his hair while he attacks your neck, his other hand running down to his boxers you were wearing. He slips his fingers in the front hole of the boxers, using his index and middle fingers to spread your folds apart. You feel him nip your neck with a smile as he smears your slick around your clit.
He then uses both of his hands to lift your shirt up and over your head. Your breasts are now out in the open, the cool air hitting your chest and making your nipples hard. You barely get a word out, Miguel already cupping your boobs and squeezes them. Your hips buck back to grind on his crotch, eyes closing as he plays with you. Miguel used his fingers to tease your nipples simultaneously, flicking and tweaking them. He lifts them up and watches them fall down before squeezing them again. Your pussy is soaking through his boxers, aching for more stimulation that’s making you feel empty.
His eyes are dark watching his own hands play with your chest, the memory of the bounce of your tits as you caught the remote high in the air. He wanted to see that again.
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Miguel could feel his cock swell and twitch along with each bounce of your breasts. You have your body arching, hands behind you and holding onto his thighs. He plays with your tits switching with his hands or his mouth–but if you asked him, he preferred sucking on them. So that’s where he was now, lips attached to your right nipple and his right hand playing with your left. You slammed down on his cock, whining since you barely felt him thrust up. But in all honesty, Miguel could do this forever with your tits in his mouth and his cock buried in your cunt. While his tongue sucked and lipped your nipple, he knew if he didn’t focus, he’d cum instantly. He looks up at you after playfully biting down on your nub, your squeaks making his dick twitch against your walls. You look down with glossy eyes, hips stuttering and pussy throbbing when you see him smirk up at you with your boob in his mouth. One of his hands that was on your waist comes up to your back to keep your body arched. Miguel scrunches his eyes shut, eyebrows furrowed while he sucks on your nipple, his hips jerking and balls slapping against your ass. You wail with each thrust, falling forward and holding onto the backrest making your boobs squish in his face. Miguel groans as he lets you fall on top of him, hands falling down to your ass as you grind on him. His cock slips in and out of your wet cunt with a wet squelch. It makes you bite your lip with a loud whimper, the action making your man under you tug on your nipple with his teeth. He’s obsessed with you, Miguel pulling away just enough to make your tits swing in his face. He glances up at your pleasure filled face, sweat glistening down your face and body while you panted and whined. He’s entranced, eyes falling down to follow the way your boobs bounce as he fucks up into you. Miguel trusts you to keep fucking yourself on his while his hands leave your ass to come up and cup and squeeze both your breasts. He kneads them and watches your mouth drop open to moan. Your head hangs and your foreheads almost touch. Miguel doesn’t need to tell you a damn thing, his lips parted while he looks at yours. You lean down to kiss him, Miguel immediately slipping his tongue past your defenses with a low groan. He continues groping you, his hips smacking up with your thrusting and he can feel himself about to cum. He can tell you’re about to too by the way your pussy spasms wildly, sucking him in deeper and soaking him in your slick.
So he hammers into you, grunting as he puts all his strength in making you cream. Your eyes roll back, mouth separating from his to dig your nails into his shoulders and roll your hips. You can barely get a word out, garbled moans of his name escaping you while your body twitches, ecstasy flowing through from top to bottom. Miguel watches your chest heave as you catch your breath, your juices dripping out of your a making a sticky mess in his lap. You’re dizzy and weak, body flopping forward on his chest. Miguel soothes you, curling his hand in your hair and pressing you into the crook of his neck. He kisses the top of your head and you’re too numb to feel him take your body off him. He places your back down on the couch, hair sticking to your face with sweat, lips plumped from kissing. You’re whining when your sensitive folds feel his still hard cock rub in between them, accidentally slipping his tip in a few times. You swallow to get the dryness out of your throat. “Mig…Mig…” You’re cut off when Miguel slams into you, your body jerking and tits bouncing with the hard thrust. Your hazy vision rolls onto his face, Miguel glued onto your chest still. He gives another few soft thrusts and watches your boobs jiggle around. You feel his cock jump inside your walls, a soft hum of approval coming from deep in his throat. He bends down, biting and licking the side of your tit to add another mark to his collection. His teeth marks littered around your plump and round flesh–his favorites being the ones around your areola.
His face is buried in your breasts while he pounds into you, your head thrown back and legs locked around his waist. Oh, he’s in heaven.
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daydreams-after-dark · 12 hours
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This is in response to you saying dont be shy about our asks sooo
Fem reader with Channie Sungie and Hyune like they just take turns at her 🥺
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Well this is a heavenly combination. Thank you for not being shy my dear anonnie.
My mind is thinking so many things right now. Like:
is she tied up or free to roam around?
is it day or night?
do they know each other, in a relationship, or strangers to lovers?
Who fucking knows - it'd be amazing however it was written.
🔞MDNI // 18+
But I'm going with living room sex. It's movie afternoon on a Saturday. You and the three men have some series running on the tv. Chan is watching it while working on his laptop. Sungie is engrossed in the story.
Hyune is both working and engrossed - in eating out your pussy! He's been sucking on your clit and finger fucking you for twenty minutes straight. But your noises are becoming too much for the other two.
"You gonna hurry up and make her cum? Those pretty sounds are not doing my dick any favors." Chan looks up from the laptop.
"Yeah, my cock is literally leaking in my pants, dude." Sungie adds.
Hyune looks up at you and smirks. "Not yet." he answers. "When it's time for her to come she has to come three times." he decides. "One on each of our cocks."
Chan's laptop is snapped closed, the tv is forgotten, The two of them surround you as they watch Hyune slide his cock into your wetness. You are more than ready, it only taking two or so thrusts for the familiar sound of wet cunt to fill the room.
Your legs are held open, someone plays with your clit, and Hyune slams into you making you fall apart.
"That's one." he whimpers as he chases his own orgasm and filling you with his seed.
"Fuck! Me next. I gotta feel you, baby. Let Sungie make you feel good." Sungie sinks in, pushing Hyune's cum back up into you. He fucks like some sort of animal in heat, he's so horny. His hips move quickly and rough, his hands grope and squeeze anything he can get a hold of. He doesn't slow down as he pants heavy in your ear. "gonna fill you, baby...gotta come for me. Do it... fuck...come on my cock."
You both come at the same time, your body shaking from the intensity. It was suck a quick orgasm that when Chan pushes himself into you, you know the next one is going to be intense.
Slow, deep, thrusts. That's Chan's method. He needs for you to feel every drag of his cock as he withdraws it, and every impact of his body slamming into yours when he bottoms out. He folds your legs up for a mating press position. Extra deep this way. "Good girl. Feels big, yeah?"
You nod and sob.
"That's okay, just be a good girl and come for daddy. Can you do that? Come for me." he picks up the pace. Still deep, but faster now.
It's too much and you come for the third time.
"Hmm, I think we should change the rules..." Hyune says, pumping his renewed hardess. "We get to come three times each." he tilts his head and looks down at your exhausted body. "And it's my turn again."
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More Sherlock & Co Headcanons
Because y'all like the first ones so much.
Mariana is one of those heathens who eats the kernels at the bottom of the popcorn bowl and enjoys it.
John and Sherlock have a rotating cast of answers to the age old client question, "So are you two...?" which only serve to confuse the asker even more. It's an incredibly enjoyable sport. Sherlock often just plays dumb, to John's enormous amusement. It's their favorite inside joke.
When he does actually eat it, Sherlock's go-to breakfast food is a boiled egg and soldiers. Fight me. I will not stand for boiled eggs and soldiers slander they are amazing and Sherlock knows it.
John keeps a collection of bloopers/funny moments he's recorded during cases in a folder on his computer. When he's feeling down, he puts in his earplugs and listens to them. He never fails to get a laugh out of it.
Speaking of language headcanons in the last post, Sherlock speaks fluent Spanish (because of course he does). Sometimes he and Mariana have innocuous conversations in Spanish just to mess with John. He finally gets what it's like to be a stranger watching them all converse in BSL.
Sherlock has a strong appreciation for the musical arts. Once, after a particularly sour case, John took Sherlock to the orchestra to lighten his mood. Sherlock didn't express much outward enjoyment, still drained from the previous week's labor, but the next day the pieces they'd heard rang out through the flat as Sherlock's touch brought them to life from memory on his violin. John found this version infinitely more beautiful than any orchestra. and he even glimpsed the ghost of a smile as Sherlock lost himself in the music.
You know how everyone has a different little doodle they do when they're bored and they've got a pen and a bit of paper around? Well, Sherlock does mandalas and circle scribbles, John does little smiley faces and zig zags, and Mariana writes peoples names in calligraphy.
@obsessed-sketches and I both agree Sherlock wears a really heavy, well-worn coat for the deep-pressure stimulation. And a scarf, because those are absolutely splendid to play/fiddle with and being all wrapped up just adds a whole nother dimension to it all.
John uses Microsoft Edge as his default browser. Mariana's exasperated protests have been completely futile in convincing him to switch and to be honest, who knows if there's any hope left for him anymore.
Speaking of browsers, Sherlock would be such a boss at the 2048 game.
Someday I'm gonna have to write a dance lesson fic, because the idea of Sherlock teaching John to dance for a case lives in my head rent free for literally every SH rendition but these two especially. Sherlock freely infodumping about the history of each song he plays as he shows John how to waltz, John filling the silence with nervous rambling, that rapport setting in and them just falling into step after a few minutes and forgetting time is even passing... I know I mostly HC them as a QPR but dear god the intimacy in that may kill me.
Mariana once introduced Sherlock to the National Day Calendar. National Cellophane Tape Day, National Life Insurance Day, National Raspberry Popover Day, and the likes are now slipped happily into conversations at 221B under Sherlock's firm belief that each one is on par with Christmas in terms of their significance in the public eye. Slay, Sherlock. National Days are awesome.
John makes the cutest sleep noises.
Yk how i said Sherlock likes rainbow sour straps. If you've ever eaten sour straps, you'll know there are two ways to eat them: whole, or by tearing the colours into strips. Clearly, as a civilised human being, Sherlock does the latter.
SHERLOCK WOULD TOTALLY WRITE AWESOME POETRY AND READ IT OUT AND JOHN AND MARIANA WOULD BE STUNNED INTO AWESTRUCK SILENCE
Mariana wears those really big hoop earrings. You know the ones.
AAAAH i should stop before this becomes a mammoth block of text. Maybe I'll make a part three.
Thank you kindly for being unwillingly subjected to my opinions coming to my TED talk.
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fullsunstrawberry · 3 days
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[Part 29: the end]
word count: 2.6k
synopsis: when your old college decides that your major isn’t worth the money. Meaning you have to transfer in the middle of your last year to neo university. But luckily you have three fuckboys to bring you out of your shell and help you get off
warnings: smut, no mention of protection, baby and princess used, overall all fluffyish smut
a/n: final :( gonna miss these characters! the masterlist will be updated monday or tuesday (im away from my pc)
taglist (18+) CLOSED
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“Already have a whole family huh?” Jaemin teased, glancing up from his phone.
“Yeah, no more babies!” you responded
“But we can still practice” " Jaemin winked, and you couldn't help but cringe, giving him a playful shove on the shoulder.
Jaemin chuckled at your reaction, his playful demeanor lighting up the room. "Come on, where's your sense of humor?" he teased, nudging you back gently.
“But I know you, you definitely weren't joking!”
Jaemin's grin widened at your accusation. "Okay, maybe I was half-joking," he admitted with a mischievous twinkle in his eye. "But hey, can you blame me? Practice makes perfect, right?"
You shook your head, laughing despite yourself. "You're insufferable," you teased back, though there was warmth in your tone.
Jaemin's eyes softened at the sound of your laughter, the corners of his lips curling up into a fond smile. "you love me," he said softly, not even realizing he used the “L” word.
You felt your heart skip a beat at Jaemin's words, "I... I do," you confessed.
Jaemin furrowed his eyebrows for a second before he realized what just happened, and his eyes widened in surprise. The room seemed to grow quieter as his gaze locked with yours. For a moment, neither of you said anything, the weight of the unspoken hanging in the air between you.
But before the tension could escalate further, Jaemin broke into a grin, his eyes crinkling at the corners as he let out a relieved laugh. "Well, well, well, looks like someone has finally admitted it," he teased, though there was a softness to his voice that betrayed his true feelings.
You couldn't help but chuckle nervously "Don't let it go to your head," you quipped, trying to lighten the mood.
Jaemin reached out to tuck a stray strand of hair behind your ear, his touch gentle and tender. "I'll try not to," he said softly, his gaze unwavering as he searched your eyes. "But... I have to admit, I've felt the same way too, for a long time”
“A long time?” Jaemin nodded, a hint of shyness coloring his cheeks. "Yeah, a long time," he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. "I didn’t want to scare you by moving too fast”
Your heart swelled at Jaemin's confession. Without a second thought, you reached out and took Jaemin's hand in yours, intertwining your fingers with his.
A soft, genuine smile spread across Jaemin's face at the touch, his eyes shining with a mixture of relief and love. "I'm glad we finally said it," he murmured, squeezing your hand gently.
You squeezed back, "Me too," you whispered, unable to tear your gaze away from his.
As if on cue, Jaemin leaned in closer, his breath warm against you as he pressed a tender kiss to your lips.
As Jaemin leaned back, his warm breath mingling with yours, you could see the raw emotion in his eyes. They glimmered with love and tenderness, reflecting the depth of his feelings for you. He whispered softly, "I love you," before placing a gentle kiss on your forehead, his lips lingering for just a moment longer. Pulling back, he gazed into your eyes.
With tender care, Jaemin trailed soft kisses down your face, starting at your nose and moving down to your jaw. Each touch was like a feather against your skin, sending shivers down your spine. As he reached your neck, his lips became slightly rougher, filled with passion and desire. Another "I love you" escaped from his lips as he peppered you with kisses, each one leaving a trail of warmth in its wake. You couldn't help but melt into him, feeling loved and cherished in every moment.
Lost in the haze of emotions, you wrapped your arms around Jaemin. Pulling him closer to your body, needing more of his touch. Jaemin moved his attention back onto your eyes, staring deep into them.
As you softly whispered the words "I love you," Jaemin's eyes filled with tender adoration. His hands reached up to gently cup your face. Before capturing your lips in a sweet, lingering kiss.
The soft warmth of Jaemin's lips against yours sent a rush of heat through you. In that moment, nothing else mattered but the connection between you two. His touch was tender yet filled with a passion that made your heart race.
As the kiss deepened, the world around you seemed to fade away, leaving only the two of you in your own little bubble of love. Every caress, every whisper, spoke volumes of the unspoken bond that had been growing between you for so so long.
When you finally pulled away, Jaemin's eyes met yours once again, filled with an intensity that made your heart flutter.
"I love you," he repeated, his voice soft yet unwavering.
"I love you too," you replied, your voice filled with the same depth of emotion..
With a contented smile, Jaemin leaned in to rest his forehead against yours, basking in the warmth of your embrace. “You’re so beautiful,”
“You're my everything,” Jaemin continued, his voice filled with sincerity.
It was a moment you wished would last forever. Jaemin's hand found its way to the bottom of your shirt and with a question in his eyes he slowly lifted the fabric, exposing your skin to the cool air of the room. His touch was gentle as his fingers traced patterns along your exposed stomach. You closed your eyes, lost in the sensation of his touch.
Jaemin's lips found yours once more, his kisses becoming more urgent, more fervent as desire flared between you. Your breath mingled with his. With a sudden gasp, Jaemin pulled back slightly, his gaze locking with yours.
“What’s wrong baby?”
Your heart pounded in your chest, “Please…more..more please!”
Jaemin’s eyes darkened as a smirk grew on his face, he brushed a gentle hand against your face. “Are you sure?”
You nodded, your eyes meeting his desperately. "I'm sure," you whispered, the longing evident in your voice.
Without a word, Jaemin’s hands were already exploring your body, his touch was on fire has he worshipped every inch of your skin.
Jaemin’s movements were quick but graceful as he lowered himself on the bed, just right between your thighs. Pushing them apart and leaving a small kiss on your right thigh.
You couldn't help but moan at the sight and feel of him, your heart pounding in your chest as anticipation filled the air. Jaemin's gaze never left yours, his eyes usually filled with hunger, but this time all you saw was adoration.
"I need you," you breathed, your voice barely above a whisper. Your breath hitched as his tongue grazed the sensitive skin beneath your belly button, making you arch into him. He chuckled softly, a mischievous glint in his eye. Before you knew it, he was working his way further down, leaving a trail of kisses as he went.
Your heart raced as you felt his lips and tongue exploring your most intimate places. You couldn't help but let out a whimper, your need for him growing more with each passing moment.
With your legs spread wide open for him, Jaemin continued to tease and torture you with his tongue. Each flick of his tongue, each gentle suck, seemed to drive you closer and closer to the edge.
You could feel your body responding, your breaths becoming heavier, your skin flushing with desire. You wanted more, needed more, and you were helpless to resist the pleasure he was giving you.
It wasn't long before Jaemin began to make his way back up your body, his eyes never leaving yours. You could see the hunger in his gaze. He positioned himself between your legs, his breath hot against your skin as he stared intently at your entrance.
With a single motion, he slid himself inside you, filling you completely. You both let out a gasp as your bodies connected.It was like a dream, but this was reality, and you were completely and utterly in love.
As he began to move, his pace slow and deliberate as your eyes locked. You could feel every inch of him as he delved deeper into you, your heart pounding in sync with his thrusts.
His lips found yours once more, and the kiss became just as passionate as the rhythm he was setting between you. You clung to him, your hands tangling in his hair, your bodies moving in perfect unison.
Moans escaped your lips, matching the ones that Jaemin was making. His breath was hot against your skin, and the scent of him enveloped you.
Jaemin's pace increased, and so did the intensity of your pleasure. Your body arched, meeting his every thrust, and you could feel yourself nearing the edge.
His eyes never left yours, and his voice broke through the haze. "Princess, are you close?" he asked, his voice low and filled with concern.
You nodded, your breath coming out in short, sharp pants. "Yeah, I'm so close, Jaemin."
He picked up the pace, his hips moving faster and harder. The room was alive with the sound of your moans, his grunts, and the slick sounds of skin on skin.
Your body seemed to have a mind of its own, arching up to meet his every thrust. You could feel the building sensation taking over your whole being.
Suddenly, you were there, on the edge of an orgasm. Your body seemed to freeze for a moment, every muscle tense, as you hovered on the edge. Then, with a sharp cry, you fell over, waves of pure pleasure washing over you. Your body shook with the intensity of the pleasure, your eyes rolling back for a moment as your orgasm took hold.
Jaemin's expression softened as he watched you climax, his own body trembling as he continued to move within you, matching the rhythm of your contractions. Your release seemed to ignite something in him, and he quickened his pace, his hips moving with a newfound intensity. The room was filled with the sound of flesh slapping against flesh as he continued to thrust.
"Jaemin, I can't take much more," you gasped, your voice barely audible over the cries of pleasure that filled the room.
He didn't miss a beat. He leaned down, his lips finding yours in a intense kiss, his tongue delving deep. The sensation of his tongue in your mouth seemed to heighten your senses, sending you even further over the edge.
Just when you thought you couldn't take it any longer, Jaemin's body stiffened, and you felt the first spasms of his release. He let out a deep moan as his body shuddering as he filled you completely.
As your body relaxed, he pulled you into a tight embrace, your sweaty bodies pressing against one another.
His lips found your forehead, your cheek, and then your mouth once more. "I love you," he whispered, his own breath coming out in short, sharp bursts.
"I love you too," you replied, your heart still pounding with the intensity of the pleasure you had just experienced.
Jaemin's eyes met yours, and you knew that this moment, right here, he was your future.
“So about that baby?”
You lifted your head to meet Jaemin's gaze, a playful smirk spreading across your lips as you spoke “Not for a while, and I expect a ring first!”
Jaemin laughed, the sound filling the room with warmth. "You have a deal," he promised.
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[previous] —> [masterlist]
taglist (1): @manooffline @jaeimjaemin @haechansbbg @lowkeyjaemle @nominsgirl @222brainrot @neobowlingshoez @rockstarhaechan @dorkyji @fullsunahceah @gucci-95 @toroufriteh @anna-357j @ditzydaisyy @haobinzzy @darlingz99 @b90lt @jwiloves @w0nslvr @alethea-moon @leep0ems @luvlyrenwoo @erizapanda @nanasbaby @mystverse @hyunjungjae @jaeminnanaaa17
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babsvibes · 1 day
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Boblin Fic Recs
Fics centered around Bob and Linda from Bob’s Burgers. This is by no means a comprehensive list, so please feel free to add your faves in the replies!
Canon Compliant
I'm in love with every song you've ever heard by @jimmypesto When Linda has one too many Pesto Coladas, Jimmy calls Bob to come collect her
I like the way you sound in the morning by @jimmypesto Six "morning afters" over the course of Bob and Linda's relationship
What's That Song? It Goes Pike... by @babsvibes Linda has a song stuck in her head, and now it's everyone's problem
gonna make love last forever by @neopetting soft otp prompts with boblin
After Date Night With the Belchers by @thestarstho A look into Bob and Linda's alone time after a date
Mixed Collections
you're in the kitchen humming, all that you ever wanted from me was sweet nothing by @jimmyjrsmusoems A few important moments in Bob and Linda's relationship, as seen through the eyes of others
Boblin Week 2023, Day Extras: Unused Prompts by @sailoreuterpe Collection of ficlets using the prompts not selected for Boblin Week 2023
Bob's Burgers Drabbles by @aimmyarrowshigh Collection of Bob's Burgers drabbles
Sips From Your Lips by Gaynin Linda and Bob have always enjoyed wine and spirits, almost as much as they've enjoyed each other (mature)
Things You Said... by @daddygrandpaandthebeaver A collection of Bob's Burgers ficlets based on "things you said..." prompts
Pre-Canon
I didn’t have it in myself to go with grace by @jimmypesto Bob and Linda break up for approximately twelve hours; wallowing ensues
not while I'm around by @jimmypesto Bob picks Linda up after a girls’ night just in time to find her being bothered by a creep
i think we do this love thing right by @br1ghtestlight Bob and Linda try to cuddle without waking up Louise
Through a Child’s Eyes by YAJJ There was romance and love in the world, and Teeny Tina knew it for a fact. All she had to do was look at her parents, after all.
just lay entwined here, undiscovered by @tully-blue Tonight, it goes: shelf, doorknob, nightstand, undressing with three stumbles and several muffled curses, vanity, and finally, Linda climbs over him and into bed. Well, if he wasn’t awake already, that would’ve done it
Canon Divergent
still my patron saint by @jimmypesto A Boblin Ghost AU (explicit)
I belong with you, you belong with me (you're my sweetheart) by @daddygrandpaandthebeaver Five universes where Bob and Linda Belcher are soulmates, plus one where they chose to be together anyway
clair de lune by @weatheredlaw Five things that didn't happen, couldn't happen, wouldn't happen
Of Pregnancies and Bumped Heads by @burgerspeople Linda's second pregnancy puts her on her ass.
Had Me at Hello by @golden--doodler Bob and Linda's big day has finally arrived after what feels like forever.
Explicit
brought purpose to your hips by @jimmypesto Linda wakes up in the middle of the night
falling for you is easy (like sunday morning) by @thisaliennerd Maybe there’s no such thing as fate, but one chance meeting is about to change the course of two people’s lives forever. Bob and Linda are falling in love fast, but can they balance their feelings with the practical realities of dating? (explicit)
Cheesus the Meatsiah by @babsvibes The night Bob almost gets the Meatsiah right
know that body like it's mine by @jimmypesto Bob and Linda always use hotel rooms as opportunities to experiment
our love's the only thing that could matter (must be signed in to view) 31 days of my favorite married couple doing sexy things. Sometimes kinky and sometimes vanilla, but they’re always very in love
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the-apocrypha · 3 days
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Hello!
I've had a brain worm about your cottagecore verse stuck in my head for a month now, so I'm finally sharing it.
The mob that stormed Hob's cottage in Eskham didn't come out of nowhere. Someone has been spreading rumours about a dangerous creature in the hedgewitch's cabin for some time. Someone who doesn't particularly like their older brother. Desire knew that they would have to stoke the tension in the village carefully, so that when the villagers' fear got the better of them, Dream would not be there to save Hob. They knew very well that even armed with torches and iron, a mob of peasants wouldn't stand a chance against a fae prince. That didn't matter though - Desire didn't need the mortals to hurt their brother directly; he just needed to be taught a lesson about taking human lovers. Getting banished from the realm of the fae just wasn't enough. 
What Desire didn't expect was to be on the recieving end of a similar fate as their brother - turns out that Mother Night does not approve of her children taking human consorts, even if that child might excel at cruel games and bargains. Long story short, when Desire falls in love with a travelling sorceress named Unity, they are yeeted out from their mother's court much like Dream was.
I think it would be funny if Desire ended up getting tossed into Hob's garden while Dream is away doing fae things™️ in the forest. At first Hob panics (understandably, they aren't really expecting visitors in the middle of nowhere), but once he recognises that the being currently squishing his strawberries is another fae, he brings them inside (does he hope that seeing another of his kind might make Dream happy? Maybe. Think of it as enrichment for your lover). Needless to say, Dream isn't exactly thrilled to see his sibling, especially when they let slip that they're rather surprised to find them both alive and (relatively) well. Oopsie, your sibling might have had something to do with your recent troubles, Dream (who would have thought).
I'm hoping for some sort of reconciliation and some reflection from Desire? Maybe being shunned by their kind might help them reconnect. After all, Desire's gonna need all the help they can get if they are to find their beloved out there...
OMG I love this so much, thank you for sharing this glorious brain worm! I love the idea that Desire is out in the mortal realm doing market research for plotting his brother’s downfall and in the process meets Unity and—I’m imagining it wasn’t quite so Love At First Sight, because sorceress!Unity definitely knows better than to tangle with the fae and wants nothing to do with any of Desire’s shit. (Desire’s always liked a challenge.) But eventually, somehow, despite both of their better judgements, the love does happen. 
Also love the idea of Desire getting dumped into the (Dream’s! Special!) strawberry patch—they’re probably not looking too hot, ala Dream when he was first exiled. Hob absolutely takes them into the house as soon as he sees the ears. He’s learned to be wary of his fellow mortals but he’s still a sucker for fae, especially ones who bear a familial resemblance to his lover, and especially ones who are all alone 😩 and hurt 😩. (Dream obviously is unimpressed with all of this, but Hob is at this point well-practiced in tuning out Dream’s Are You Trying To Get Yourself Killed, I Don’t Care That You Survived Thirty-Three Years Without Me, You Won’t Be Surviving The Next Five Minutes If You Don’t Start Apologizing, You Useless Fragile Mortal Tirade).
Also! The idea of Dream and Desire hissing faeish insults at each other over the dinner table while Hob is desperately trying to steer the conversation back to English—hysterical. Dream getting possessive of Hob when Desire looks at him a few seconds too long, and Desire being like “I absolutely do not want your grubby little bear-man, Dream, calm your tits. Unlike you, I have standards.”—excellent. I love it all. 
(Though let’s be real, in this particular AU the moment Dream finds out Desire was the reason that Hob got shishkebabed, this goes from a family feud to attempted murder real quick. IDK if Dream would get over that for… at least a few decades. Desire would be turfed out of the house so fast their head would spin. Their only saving grace might be if Hob suggests that the faster they find Unity, the faster Desire will be out of their hair.) 
I’ll be honest, the possibilities for fae!Dream + siblings are limitless and wonderful, and I’m constantly sad that the cottagecore ‘verse ended up constructed in a way that means—without some very exceptional circumstances, as you have crafted here—we won’t ever really see Dream interacting with his family ever again. At least, not in the official version. Please feel free to tell me all about the elaborate ways in which fae!Dream and Desire get forced into a metaphorical Get Along Shirt, or Death dropping by with little fae care packages with all the stuff Dream misses from his home, or Delirium going on forest walks with Dream and asking him ten million questions about all the strange mortal animals and plants. Dream deserves better relationships with his siblings than what I dealt him in this ‘verse. <3
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melanieph321 · 3 days
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Hi lovely,
I’m actually kind of new to Tumblr so I don’t know how this works but you were actually one of the first bloggers that popped up on my feed with your post about Kenan Yildiz 😭and I really enjoyed reading it so much. And then I clicked on your feed and noticed that you take request I don’t know if you do that anymore but I wanted to give it a try. I was thinking that maybe the reader and Kenan are dating but keeping it private since she’s the sister of one of his best friends on the team (maybe Vlahović) So when Juventus celebrated their win ,against another club, they went to a restaurant to celebrate and the waiter was constantly hitting on the reader which made Kenan very jealous so he made sure the waiter knows who you belong with(maybe giving the reader a hickey) and he made sure that the waiter saw how Kenan followed you to the bathroom.
I don’t know if that makes sense to you but anyways just wanted to get that of my chest 💕🎀
Love this! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🔥🔥🔥🔥
Kenan Yildiz x Reader - Claim Me Part 1/3
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Enjoy!
"I have to go."
"What, no. Five more minutes."
"Kenan." You chuckled. The hardest part was always to get him off of you. After Juventus successful Copa Italia win against Atalanta, it was practically impossible. Kenan had you escaping yesterdays celebrations by sneaking back to his hotel room. There you did unspeakable things to each other. Fun. But unspeakable things.
"Fuck, you're so hot." He mumbled and planted soft kisses against your neck.
"Thank you." You giggled and did not reject the way he wanted to keep you in bed with him. However, there was just one small problem...
"I have to get back to my room before my family notices that I'm gone."
"Relax, I saw your sister dancing on top of a table before we left the club last night. I'm sure she'll still be passed out drunk by the time you get back."
"Yes, my sister perhaps, but my brother won't be."
Kenan raised his head from the crook of your neck. The mentioning of Dusan always set him off, especially if you mentioned him in a moment of intimacy, which has happened more than once before.
"He'll be the first one to look for me." You nodded.
Kenan sighed and rolled onto his back, letting you go.
"Thank you." You bent down to kiss his lips before rushing to the bathroom. However, you did not remain in there for long.
"Fuck!"
You were quick to stumbled back into the room, a hand covering your throat and a struck of panic in your eyes.
"What?" Kenan asked, seeing the expression on your face.
"I hate you."
"What did I do?"
"Kenan, you didn't."
"I didn't do what?" He said, rightfully confused.
You released the hand covering your throat, revealing a hickey the size of a coin.
"Fuck."
"Yes, fuck you." You sprung towards the bed, ambushing your boyfriend with harmless punches to the sheets.
"Baby." He chuckled. "I'm really sorry, okay."
"Sorry? Sorry won't cut it Kenan, Dusan will kill me if he sees it."
Kenan caught your hands, preventing you from throwing any more punches. "You mean me." He said. "I'm pretty sure I'll be the first one your brother would want to kill."
"Think again. He doesn't even know that we're seeing each other Kenan,  I'm the one he's gonna kill."
"Well, maybe it's time we tell him that we're together then?"
You paused, eyes searching your boyfriend's face. He had soft features. Trying to cover them up with a cut to his eyebrow only made him look more like a puppy dog. "You're out of your mind." You said and climbed off of him.
"Right. I'm out of my mind for wanting to be able to hold my girlfriends hand in public, or better yet, kiss her in public."
"Yes, Kenan. You're out of your mind for that. I've told you that my brother won't allow it."
"Well, maybe it's time you stick up to your brother then? Or perhaps our relationship is not worth the hassle?"
It's not that easy, you thought.
Despite what Kenan thought, it was not that easy. You had always been the baby of the family, the youngest three. Your oldest brother Dusan always watched over you like a hawk. But as you grew older, you began to feel suffocated by his constant protection. You longed for the freedom to make your own decisions and live your own life. But that wasn't the case right now.
"I'm back!" You announced, after receiving about a dusin text message from Dusan on your way up the hotel elevator. You had just shut the door behind you when his head popped out from the bathroom.
"Where have you been?" He asked. Getting up before seven AM after a night of celebrations was mental. But that's just who your brother was, a control freak in all things.
"I was just out for a run." You said.
"Wearing heels?"
He shot a glance at the pair that you were holding in your hands.
"Yes, Dusan. In my heels. It's a trend, look it up."
He shook his head but did not question you further. "Remember, be ready for lunch with the team this afternoon."
"Right." You crossed the joint living area on your way to your bedroom.
"I mean it, Y/N. Remind Nina to be ready on time as well."
"Yeah, yeah. I will."
You shut the door behind you and were quick to peel down the laces to your dress, stepping out of it. You left it on the floor,  amongst the other scattered clothes in the dungeon that you and your sister had been sharing for the weekend. She lay fast asleep as you joined her under the covers. Sometimes, you wondered how the two of you turned out so chill while Dusan got the off gene. I guess you'd never find out.
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hellfirecvnt · 9 hours
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Light my Fire
Lee Russell x Fem!Reader pt. 5
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Summary: Your plan goes awry. Tensions are high. What's everybody gonna do about it? Ooh.
Warnings: sex, edging, creampie, quickie, crime makes him horny, low-key fluff at the end (idk how to end stories????)
Notes: EW this chapter is so short, but it's only bc this is the end of this series and I'm about to do another Lee Russell series I'm really excited about. Stay tuned!
Read part one here. // Part two here. // Part three here. // Part four here.
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The night air is brisk as you park your car in the far-off lot behind the school. You're swift and careful sneaking inside, unseen. You beeline straight for the principal's office where Neal and Lee wait for you.
"'Bout fuckin' time, Y/L/N," Gamby barks, holding the door for you and scanning the surroundings as if you've been followed. You haven't. That's just how he is.
"Shut up, I forgot we were even doing this until Lee texted me."
"Both of you shut up, this is serious," Lee takes a seat at the desk and Gamby enviously joins him on the other side as if an audience of just you is enough to require them to validate their seniority.
"Why're you so serious? We're just scaring her a little," you laugh, unable to imagine anything going wrong with a plan that's meant to knock a vase or two over.
"Might have something to do with it being a felony." Neal arches his brows.
"You know what else is a felony? Doing hallucinogens on the school campus during a football game. You're already in it, Gamby. I hope you look good in orange," you taunt, earning a pair of narrow eyes from him.
"Will you two fuck sticks shut up for five goddamn seconds?!" Lee bursts, his voice hitting that cracked note it does when he's stressed. You and Gamby look at each other, confused. It seems the two of you have underestimated how much pressure Lee is holding right now.
"Damn, dude. It's alright, calm down." You place a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "Let's just get in there and get out. Easy." Your pep talk seems to do the trick and all three of you file out to the bus lanes to hop in a rented white van.
The trip is silent and eerily long. You and Neal exchange tense glances, but Lee stays stone-focused on the road. He's not even driving, Gamby is. Lee's just unwavering his attention from the asphalt, deep in thought, you assume.
The van pulls up to a house in a small neighborhood, stopping out front. It's a little bold for your tastes, but you don't plan to be in there long anyways.
"Oh shit, is this where she lives?" You ask.
“What a shit-hole.” Neal adds, laughing.
"This is my house, motherfucker." Lee looks at him with wide, angry eyes. "It’s a mid-century sea ranch!"
"It's a... It's a great sea ranch, Lee." You attempt to talk down his stress, but he just shakes his head as he climbs out of the van, promising to be back after he grabs something from inside. When he comes back, his hands seem empty, but you don't question it.
The act continues and Neal pulls the large rental van into the nearby cul-de-sac and parks, turning off the headlights. You stare out the window, scanning for any movement inside the house.
"Looks still to me," you whisper.
"She's gonna be at that game all night," Neal mumbles, unbuckling his seatbelt.
The three of you pile out of the van quietly and make your way up to her back porch. Neal begins to wrap his tie around his fist.
"Are you seriously gonna punch out that window?" You ask, concerned about the risk factor. Gamby only raises his eyebrows.
"Oh, fuck you. No you're not," Lee's laughter is cut off by the shattering sound of a small window in Dr. Brown's back door.
"Oh, shit!" You and Lee exclaim at the same time.
"Bitches first." Neal holds out his arm, welcoming Lee inside. The three of you scramble to find things of value to knock around and stage a thorough break-in. Suddenly, you hear the sound of a loud crash.
"A little much, Lee, don't you think?" You hiss, annoyed by the monstrous volume of the crash.
"Gamby broke the fuckin' window," he protests.
"Yeah, so we could get in. It's a fake robbery, you think they're not gonna break a fucking window?" Neal's sass only amplifies Lee's.
"Darlin', smash this mug and we'll leave right now, I promise." The look on his face tells you loud and clear that he's lying to you.
"You're a lying piece of shit, Mr. Russell," you huff and he shrugs with a "shy" grin.
"And yet, you're gonna do whatever I say, aren't you?" His eyes twinkle and you know he's right. Your expression is one of defiance as you snatch the mug from his hands and slam it on the ground. The tiny shards of porcelain explode in every direction against the polished hardwood floor.
"Well, look at you, hardened criminal." Lee grins, breaking out into a damn near rampage. Gamby seems to have caught whatever enraged bug bit Lee and the two of them tear through the house like maniacs.
"Oh, no..." You stare in horror as the two buffoons tear Belinda's home to shreds. You're watching Neal in horror as he wrecks her china cabinet. The only thing that can tear your eyes away from the mess is the unmistakable stench of burning synthetic fabric. "Lee?!"
"Don't look at me like that, sweetheart. We need her gone," he says with an emotionless face. He tilts his head to the side, still looking at you as the flames get higher. It's like he's someone else for just a second, and while you know you should be off-put and even scared, you can't stand how much you want him right now. The two of you are frozen in a stare-off as the house fills with toxic black smoke. Gamby's yelling something, but everything's muffled as all your attention belongs to Lee.
"Y/N, come on!" He screams one more time before cursing aloud and grabbing your arm. Neal drags you out of the burning abode and shoves you out the back door onto the lawn where you land with a thud, only then being knocked out of your lusty trance. Gamby hacks and coughs from the amount of smoke that filled his lungs while he waited for you to get out of the house.
"Neal?! What the fuck? Where's Lee?" You scramble to your feet, blackened by the tarish nature of the soot. You look around frantically for your third other superior, but he's nowhere to be found. "Gamby!" You snap at him, demanding answers.
"Hey, motherfucker. Let's not scream each other's names out here while the place is burning down," Lee appears from the bushes like some sort of Halloween trick. You roll your eyes, relieved to see him.
"Let's get the fuck out of here!" You whisper harshly, leading the men to the van. The drive back to the school is silent. You're unsure what everyone else is feeling now that the heat of the moment has cooled. Have you all gone too far? Did anyone see you? Your mind races with anxiety. You've just been an accessory to arson just because the man behind the lighter looks a little too good in his silly patterned suits.
The van pulls into the school lot and Gamby drops the two of you off by your cars.
"I'm gonna... Get this thing off the road. Return it tomorrow." Neal drives off, leaving the two of you alone in the parking lot. Mr. Gamby is clearly distressed and dissociating from the reality of what he was just a part of, but Lee? Lee's calm. More calm than you've ever seen him. So calm, you wonder if it's an act or if he truly did find that much release and relaxation in destroying another person's home for his own gain. It's disgusting behavior, and the way he's carrying it makes your knees weak.
Lee Russell looks you up and down with a flat face. His lack of readability makes you nervous and excited. His eyes trail back up your body and to your eyes, inviting you to follow him inside the dark, locked school. You can barely stifle an excited squeal as you trail happily behind him. He's uncharacteristically silent, bubbling at the brim with adrenaline and desire. The feeling of conquering his enemy is almost as orgasmic as fucking you senseless in the principal's office.
He opens the door and you giddily trot inside, taken aback by how dark it is in here at night. You're attempting to let your eyes adjust when you hear the door close and feel Lee's nimble, needy hands groping roughly at your chest from behind.
"You looked a little scared back there, darlin'." He kisses and nips at your neck, whispering with warm breath in your ear.
"Lee, we could get in so much trouble," you speak through small gasps.
"But we won't," he chuckles against your skin, tightening his grip around your breasts. "I'm fucking invincible." He suddenly spins you around, almost like dancing, before he guides you backward toward the desk, laying you back on it so he can lift your legs around his waist. Neither of you pays attention to any of the small ornaments and stationary that fall off in the process.
He crashes his soft, balmed lips against yours, moving his head back and forth in sync with yours. It was unclear to you until now how touch-starved you were before he had his hands on you so roughly, never mind having him only a few days ago.
"Lee-" you huff his name, hoping to speed this heated affair along so you can feel him inside you.
"Shh, sweetheart," he whispers, placing a thumb on your pouting lips. "Let me savor this." He tilts his head back, hands gripping your waist, pulling your clothed cunt to his growing erection straining against his slacks. You lie back on the desk, accepting each of his sexual prods and squeezes. Primal groans of pleasure rumble lowly from his chest as he slides his palms up and down your body, studying every inch of you, mesmerized.
It feels like he's toying with you forever. Pressing your breasts together and slipping his hands under your bra. He catches you off guard when he finally slips a hand up your skirt and skillfully slips your lace and silk panties off your legs. You gasp, suddenly fully exposed to him yet again.
"I really don't give a shit if they bring in a new principal as long as I've got a claim on this tight fucking pussy of yours," he sighs, jaw hanging slack as he slips a well-manicured finger up and down your throbbing clit. "Fuckin' Christ."
You release a string of hearty moans, desperate for more and more. He smiles a big, white smile as he plays you like an instrument, filling the room with the sounds of your pleasure. Lee's lips part as he focuses intently on his fingers scissoring inside you, bringing you closer and closer to your climax. Just as it seems you're going to give, he pulls away without so much as a kiss.
"Lee!" You whine, quickly replacing his fingers with your own. That's not part of his plan, though. He grabs your wrists and holds them in front of you, staring into your face in the very dimly lit office room. He holds your wrists in place and watches your shifting, desperate face. "Please!" You arch your back, attempting to run against him like you're in heat, but he doesn't let you reach. Your climax quickly dwindles away and your knees feel like they're made of gelatin.
"Shhh," he whispers, but it turns into a taunting chuckle. He's laughing at you. Laughing at the puddle of a woman you turn into for him. He truly feels invincible. "Do you want it, sweetheart?" He asks with the same emotionless face and tilted head he had in Belinda's burning home.
"I need it, Lee. Please," you moan, hoping so badly this is finally it. Lee reaches for his belt and unfastens the metal and leather painstakingly slowly.
"God, look at you, begging for me to fuck you after what you helped me do." He frees his throbbing cock, positioning his pre-cum soaked tip at your awaiting cunt. He hovers there, hanging his mouth open and tilting his chin up as he looks down at you, taunting. "So close..."
You do all you can to meet him halfway, to feel him inside you, and to dismiss this erotic display of dominance. Lee slaps the head against your sensitive slit a few times, collecting your arousal with his before sinking his tip into you. You release a filthy, guttural moan that makes him shudder as he slips in all the way to his hilt.
"Fucking, god damn it," he groans. "All I've been fucking thinking about..." He slowly slides out, nearly withdrawing completely, but then he slams his hips against yours. This brutal thrust defines his rhythm and he begins to fuck you like he hates you. His bucking hips slam into you hard and fast as ravenous moans pour from his lips.
"You're... Fucking insane," you giggle between rough thrusts.
"This pussy's fucking insane." Lee quickens his pace, throwing his head back in ecstasy. He quickly removes himself from you, only to yank you off the desk and spin you around. Once you're facing the desk, he bends you over and roughly lifts your pencil skirt to expose your round ass. He repositions himself at your pussy and slams his way in. The room is an echo chamber of the two of you expressing your pleasure through loud, sensual moans.
"Lee!" You gasp, arching your back to better present yourself to him. He fucks rhythmically as you're quickly pushed closer and closer to your orgasm.
"Come on, darlin'," he whispers, chasing his own high. After a few more minutes, a vulnerable groan escapes Lee's lips, and the two of you climax at nearly the same time. He finishes inside you as you flood his desk and pants. The two of you hold still for a moment before he slowly slips out of your sensitive entrance and allows the rest of the mixture of cum to pour out of you.
"Lee... That was-"
"You're coming home with me tonight, Y/N." Lee smiles warmly, almost as if he's waiting for you to accept or decline. You're still fuzzy-brained and dripping with the evidence of his violations.
"Oh, yeah. I'd, um, love to," you accept shyly, confused and aroused by this new genre of dominance from him. Lee stands next to you where you lie face down on his desk, knees buckled beneath you. He gently strokes your hair as he speaks.
"I don't wanna go scaring you off or anything, but" he pulls your hair away from your face. "We don't have to call this anything-"
"I wanna call it something," you say, quickly. He grins.
"I don't care what you wanna call it. I'm calling you mine."
End.
•••••
Taglist: @therest-stillunwritten // @its-in-the-woods // @justme12200 // @sixx-writes // @littlenosoul // @itsyellow // @blackwoodtree // @hiddlebatchedloki // @ivyinthesun // @alastorsw1f3 // @sexy-monster-fucker // @writtenbyhollywood //
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Text
BALDUR'S GATE 3 x MAMMA MIA! AU
CHARACTERS
[YOU HAVE PERMISSION TO USE MY IDEA FOR ANYTHING YOU WANT, I ONLY ASK YOU CREDIT ME]
(break to save your dash)
Now, not every character is going to fit cleanly into character slots (there are too many characters to fill the main cast) so some of our Baldur's Gate loves will be sharing character traits and plot devices amongst each other.
Let’s start with Donna: She will be played by Tav obviously. I mean there really is no other choice here. We need someone who has gotten romantically entangled with multiple if not all the companions. The one unfortunate snag is that Tav has to carry or otherwise create the child of dubious parentage without the other parent knowing. That does pigeonhole the characterization a bit unless you want to go the magic route with it (which opens a line of ethical questioning beyond not telling the Parent of your child about the existence of said child)
For the purposes of this thought experiment, I'm operating under Tav being AFAB and having a womb to carry the baby. I’m also operating under the idea that all the companions have the reproductive organs of the gender they present as in game. If anyone wants to actually do something with this they are free to do whatever the fuck they want and use whatever headcanons they want. 
Sophie is going to be played by Tav’s kid. This one doesn’t have a hard and fast gender rule (TIL Sophus is the masculine version of Sophie) but they have to want to know who their other sire is and be generally chaotic which is not hard when they’ve grown up with the Tadfools as their role models. It is important that they display mostly Tav’s traits with others that could be any one of their other parent’s. (think Amanda Siefried and Meryl Streep are both blonde and similarly built. Sophie draws like Sam and sings and plays like Harry and has Bill’s adventurous spunk)
For ease of writing Tav’s Kid will be referred to as Soph from here on out.
Speaking of Sires, the Dads:
Sam: I waffled a LOT on who to choose out of the Baldur’s Boys because I wanted to keep it to just the traditional three and to just companions. You can obviously shuffle around people (I'm sure the Rolan girlies (gender neutral) would love putting him in this AU) and expand the possible dad list (though I don’t know how to split the characteristics like the Donna’s Friends). I chose to go with Gale here. I think he fits the very no nonsense and very anxious vibes from Sam in the show/movie. Instead of a business person who “went home to get married” perhaps Gale got called upon by Mystra as her Chosen and left to focus on his Wizardry. He is definitely the kind to break Tav’s heart over duty and be so ashamed he doesn’t really speak to them for 20 years. 
Bill: This one was damn near a no brainer once I was considering it. It’s Halsin. Who better to be the Hippie, fun-loving, sex god and travel writer? He retains all his Baldur’s Gate characteristics. His experience with Tav is truly just a bit of fun before they both go their separate ways. Their relationship is HEAPS less frigid than Gale and Tav’s. 
Now this is where you can go two ways with this. You could give Halsin is canon good ending (Reithwin with the kids) BUT we miss Bill being scared shitless at the prospect of having a child which I always loved as a characterization (Skarsgard plays it like a champ in the film, he looks like he’s gonna have a heart attack lmao). I feel like Clan Dad Halsin after 20 years is way too open to the idea of having something permanent like a kid. Wandering Arch Druid Halsin might be a little more scared shitless at the idea. That one is a personal preference, I think I’d prefer Reithwin Halsin even though I miss the majesty of an internal conflict.
Harry: Now this one also was a no-brainer but needs to be explained with some tact. It’s Astarion. It is not because Astarion is the most effeminate of the group. For those that don’t know, Harry is canonically gay. The companions are all pan. I chose Astarion because there is an opportunity to do something else transformative with Astarion and Tav’s tryst. 
In Mamma Mia, Harry talks about how Donna is the last and only woman he’s loved and their time together helped him accept his sexuality. In the stage show he’s in a committed relationship (his partner's name is fully escaping me atm). It always stuck out to me that Donna changed Harry and that’s why he still loves her after all these years. Sam obviously regrets leaving to do what was expected of him because he didn’t love his first wife. Bill sees the life of adventure and companionship he could have had with Donna but acknowledges that that time is behind them and still loves her anyways. And Harry loves that Donna made him see himself clearly for the first time in his life and loves her for it. You can see why Astarion came to mind I hope. 
Astarion’s night with Tav was him figuring out what intimacy meant to him after finally closing the Cazador Chapter of his life. The encounter was brief but it changed him for the better and allowed him to start healing.
EDIT: I realized I didn’t cover Astarion’s Vampirism at all. For story purposes assume he has some kind of temporary solution to the sun issue because I need his ass to be present when this is set on a fantasy Greek island. The Dhampir issue is… something. I sludged through some further thought experiments. Tav and the kid being Tieflings hides the fang coloration issue. Explaining away that the characteristics haven’t presented yet because the kid is still quite young by nearly all standards (20 is just barely of age for humans, and though they are full grown biologically they are still children in Elven society) and also have been largely sheltered from danger their whole life also works.
But to be honest, despite what the second movie and its director want you to believe, I think Harry is the least likely father of the three. I am comfortable extending this to Astarion. 
Okay now we are into the Dynamos! Fuck yes! Rosie and Tanya are my favorites (it helps that they are PERFECTLY casted in the movie oh my god). I have split their characteristics across the girls. There are some of the companions that are obviously one or the other (Karlach is the most Rosie coded while Minthara SCREAMS Tanya) while others send mixed signals (Shadowheart is the most even, skewing towards Tanya slightly while Lae’zel has Tanya’s bitchy attitude and Rosie’s  “lone wolf” outlook) SO I’m going to make a chart
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Like Astarion, for story purposes, assume Karlach’s heart issue has been solved.
Graphic design is my passion
ANYWAYS you may have noticed three of our friends are missing from this line up. Our intrepid Folk Hero Formally Known As The Blade of Frontiers, Wyll, Pack Mother, Jaheria, and her trusty ride or die Rashamen, Minsc (and don’t forget Boo!). 
I had some trouble with these nerds because initially I was playing with making Wyll the second half of Sam, he would have usurped the businessman and maybe the gone home to get married bit while Gale was the heartbreaker and took something from Bill’s characterization, but I was having trouble with losing character motivations. Plus Wyll is canonically not the type for flings. So I am having him be a good family friend invited to the wedding but not involved in the parentage. He essentially is a more involved part of the Greek Chorus. He could take Sam entirely if you are not the type for Gale but you will see why I did this when I get into the songs (yes I am that fucking insane about this.) 
Jaheira does have the countenance to be a Dynamo BUT there is this minor character that I think about way too often that I wanted her to take. She is only mentioned in the first movie and the stage show in one line and seen a little in the second movie (which is a fever dream and convolutes the “lore” but I love it anyways). It’s Bill’s Great Aunt Sophia that left Donna the money to start Villa Donna. OBVIOUSLY she isn’t directly going to be playing Halsin’s Great Aunt or be dead (though she will be ancient by then) but she’s going to fill the mentor role for Tav and help out with Soph. She is the only one who knows that Gale Halsin and Astarion are the possible fathers until the beginning of the shenanigans.
Minsc, like Wyll, doesn’t have a direct parallel. He is also a part of the more involved Greek Chorus. He is Soph’s crazy uncle. He got them into all kinds of trouble and still does to this day. He gives a less emotional and personal version of Sam’s “are you sure you want to do this, you are so young” speech that essentially is offering to run off and be warriors (His plan does not get them away from anyone, he’s unanimously elected that the entire tadfool group is coming with them). But he does it after Gale gives the original speech that severely upsets Soph so it serves as a cheer up speech (“Minsc is unsure if the Wizard should come along seeing as he has upset the little warrior so, but Boo says he is very useful and Minsc agrees. So he can come with, but he does not get to pet Boo’s furry little bottom!”). 
The rest of our Greek Chorus and people like Sky and Sophie’s Friends are filled out by various NPCs. Pepper is played by Mol. Ali and Lisa are open to OCs to be honest but the idea of Yenna and Arabella hearing the saucy details of a story they were partly involved in is really funny to me so they are listed in the song list as the backup singers. Sky is an OC because I wasn’t fully comfortable using any of the child NPCs. He’s referred to as Soph’s partner.
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goodluckclove · 2 days
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hey clove ! long fucking ask wow i apologize. this is just me rambling so conserve your brain if you wanna
i was thinking a lot about fancy foods today and had some interesting thoughts . i work at my local mall selling frozen macarons/chocolates/gelato and other pastries etc at a little kiosk in the middle of the food court for "luxury" prices (like almost 4 dollars per macaron). everything in the display cases is visually enticing - the macarons are brightly colored, the chocolates are in different shapes and colors and textures, the gelato is, ,, well you know how cute gelato is it's pretty damn cute. and the kiosk is white and generally pretty spotless as well, and the decor is french-themed cus that's the genre of stuff we sell. overalll it's marketing toward the WASPs of the area and their young kids. but something i've realized is that while everything we sell might be super yummy to look at, it's not really that yummy to eat. the macarons largely taste the same, and that flavor is mostly just almond. the colors are just colors, they're like froot loops. the gelato - which i've only recently properly tried - tastes pretty damn good (we sell a praline hazelnut one - OH BABYYYYY. i will be embalmed in that stuff when i die) - but the texture is just way, way off. it's grainy and just not like gelato at all. it feels like a scam or a multi level marketing scheme. its advertised as being super high end and bougie but it's really not.
compare that to the other restaurants in the food court. they're not glamorous. there's only a few chain restaurants; the rest have generic names, have fast-talking employees with beautifully diverse accents, have graphics with three different logo iterations and menus with low-quality photos. today i bought an egg and mozzarella crepe from one of these restaurants, and watched it being made while the employees threw friendly jabs at each other in a language i didn't recognize as an icon of the virgin mary gazed at them from the wall. the crepe wasn't pretty or brightly colored or aesthetically packaged. it cost me ten dollars with a tip and it was more food than i could ever eat. i sat crammed next to the sink in the kiosk using our big rubbermaid freezer cart as a table and tried not to cut the aluminum foil and styrofoam container along with the crepe. that thing made me so nostalgic and calm; the flavors were so familiar and comforting.
there's bigger nuances here than just "pretty food bad, unpretty food good", but it was a really interesting observation for me. i already knew my job was lowkey scam-ish, but to see real food actually being made without much fretting over how visually good it is to focus on how good for the eater it is - it was cool. i'm quitting my job soon. who knows, i might apply to the pancake place they're putting in.
anyway this was just a neat day, and i thought you might find it interesting. i hope you're doing well, and congrats again on blind trust !
God I loved reading this. Your descriptions of these two conflicting environments ring so true in my head. I'm gonna go ahead and drop a read more because I do have some food thoughts related to this and I'm also feeling like rambling.
Because we've all been there, right? The type of fancy bakery that sells a cake for like six dollars that looks amazing but is mostly moose or like stale almond cake. Macaroons are so enticing in theory, but because of the effort it takes to actually make them in the way they're intended they're surprisingly difficult to do right. You have a good macaroon and it's fucking worth 4 dollars, though. The combination of the crisp outer shell with the plush meringue and thick frosting. Plus they come in fun flavors - rose, lavender, earl grey. Yum yum. But a bad one just turns into paste in your mouth.
One of my favorite things in the world is what I call a medium-fancy dessert. It's usually a cake for me, although gelato would also suffice. It's something that feels fancy without losing that base level of quality and satisfaction. There's a bakery in Portland that stocks a 24-hour vending machine with their cakes (I know man it's crazy), and they're a pretty solid source of medium-fancy treats. They look pretty, but they have a ratio of soft, moist cake to quality frosting that really gives you a filling experience.
If that's not accessible, tiramisu works nearly every time for me. Plus it's not usually that more expensive than other cakes.
Compare that to smaller, usually immigrant-run restaurants that sometimes choose to let the quality of their food speak over the aesthetics of the storefront. What comes to mind when I imagine that is Sivalai Thai Restaurant, which is my favorite place for Thai food in my part of Portland. That's saying a lot too, since there are a TON of Thai places here for some reason.
Riley and I order from there a lot, and the portions are really good. The Thai Iced Tea is delicious. But I'm always impressed by the little touches the owners add - mainly how they always throw in a free portion of mango sticky rice, but also that they don't mind packaging a container of their Prik Nam Pla, which is like my favorite Asian condiment ever. It's Thai chilis and green onion in fish sauce and it is this insane mixture of sweet tanginess and sharp, fresh spice. I just learned how to make a vegan version from scratch and it's changed my life.
What I've loved to do in food service is combine these two experiences. I worked at Zupan's which is a boutique grocery store here in the Pacific Northwest, and one of my favorite things to do was provide an extra homey quality to the place that is otherwise asking you to pay like seven dollars for a bag of Doritos.
We had a different meat special at the deli every day, and on Sunday (I think) it was prime rib. Like, actual prime rib - very good, very expensive. A serving for one person would be like thirty bucks. We were allowed to give out samples though, so I'd summon like everyone I saw and invite them to try it.
They'd all love it, of course. It was fucking spectacular. Crispy, but with the perfect amount of rich fat and meat. Delectably salty. Rubbed with herbs and spices that would char as it smoked on the grills outside the store. It was truly remarkable stuff - but I'm not about to push cooked meat that's like sixty bucks a pound, maybe more.
What I would say, though, is that while Sunday is our prime rib roast day, we cut the ribs off in advance and cook them up for people to buy on Monday. So you can essentially get the deliciousness of the prime rib for like a forth of the price. People always seemed to like to hear that.
Food takes care of people, you know? And the people that serve food also take care of people. And I've always found that to be an incredibly important thing. If I am ever in a situation where I have to go back to a conventional full-time job, I'm far more likely to go back to food service than copywriting. I feel like I did much more good waiting tables at a Denny's than I did writing pest control websites for my bullshit media job.
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kallistcs · 2 years
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CHARACTER TRIVIA GAME !
instructions: describe 10 random headcanons about your muse of choice that will rarely ever have the chance to naturally come up in threads. Go wild, go random, go meta! repost, do not reblog!
Ganymede working as a shepherd; I usually just handwave it (myth-wise it's clear it's a perfectly fine occupation even for princes to have), but since finding out that royal Hittite princes probably spent a couple years in a "real" profession (one of the kings had been a stablehand, for example!), probably when they're late teens or something, that's what I go with when it comes to Ganymede herding sheep on Mount Ida. It's part of his "education".
He does have quite a number of various pieces from his culture (both Luwian and Hittite) up through the Neo-Hittite era (even if the countries that far east wouldn't have wholly shared the western Luwian culture, undoubtedly) but Ganymede always regrets not taking the opportunity to pick up more when he could.
Ganymede doesn't often hold grudges, but he's actually extremely "good" at it. The most prominent ones are against Achilles, Neoptolemus and Diomedes (the last potentially awkward if one acknowledges the possibility of Athena giving Diomedes immortality). Yes, all the way into modern day. No, he doesn't care how unreasonable that is.
He's really good at several instruments, but he never got the hang of lyres and other similar string instruments played with your fingers/a pick.
Is absolutely fascinated by anything relating to space and their solar system. In conjunction to that, rather tickled pink by the fact that he's got a moon named after him. Fond of the Aquarius constellation for similar reasons, but the moon is much closer and a far more concrete "thing".
Simply cannot get used to how Troy's location ends up firmly inland, even long after the bay silted up. Sure, it means his grandfather's river is longer now, but to him the location should still be next to water, not at a good distance away from it!
Was more nervous around Persephone than Hades, early on. A goddess ruler of the underworld is what he was more used to, so Persephone and her position as Queen of the Underworld was much more prominent. (Doesn't seem to be known of any in specific Luwian god and goddess of the relevant underworld, so I go with the Hittite Sun-Goddess of the Earth for that.)
In conjunction with the above, will sometimes slip up when speaking languages that aren't Greek, and call the Underworld the "Dark Earth", because that's still how he thinks about the location in his head.
Has had a number of different pets through the years, but he prefers dogs. Usually gets shepherding or straight up companion breeds. Alopekis and Kokoni are recent favourites.
Learned Turkish out of necessity and to be able to blend in when moving about his native land, not out of any sense of affinity.
Tagged by: no one! Tagging: @mvndrvke
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ereborne · 3 months
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Song of the Day: February 20
“Run Away” by Sarah Jarosz
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fantasy-costco · 1 year
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After this semester ends in like a week I won't have any more religious studies classes like. Ever again. My religious studies advisor already told me that people have tried to put religious studies classes towards history degrees in the masters program but the school won't let them. I can always keep researching on my own and part of the point of this minor was to get the tools to do so but religious studies is a field full of so much bias and it's nice to have someone to guide me through that.
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rorsry · 10 months
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watched uhh dorothy returns ro wizard of oz (2013) and i'd give it a 6.5/10 in general but entertainment wise i'd give it an 8.5 (tbf i was watching it with my brother idk how i'd rate it if i was alone) theres a part where they need a boat and dorothy snaps a piece of wood off a tree who yells in pain and then every tree there starts throwing rocks and acorns at her but then it cuts to a tree hunched over and hes like "take me... take me." and i csnt properly explain why it's so unbelievably funny. the line delivery makes him sound so accepting like he's really willing to die to help dorothy get a boat and i can't stop thinking about it
#also watched dino king. uh. 29 minutes in my brother and i thought it was gonna end soon so we paused and saw we still had an hour left#and we both visibly went HUH??? and i was like are we gonna power through this movie or watch khumba......and he chose to power through#for a dinosaur movie it's not bad i actually really like what they tried going for? ie using footage of real landscape and cgi-ing dinos#in it to make it seem like it's Real Life. obviously the cgi is so very noticable but they did pretty good👍🏼#when speckles (main character) fell into water instead of cgi-ing the water the dropped something irl but put his model over ir#which i find neat i didnt think they'd do that. kinda sad at the lack of blood when the dinos would kill each other#also speckles' family dies which i expected and when the timeskip happens and he finds a girl and then she dies i expected however i did no#expect them to kill two out of three kids like i'm glad junior survived but god damn after the first one died i was hoping the last two#would survive at the very least. also fuck one eyed i thought he was just survivng at first but no he literally started beef#with a one year old dinosaur baby and decided Yeah Im Gonna Ruin Your Life Forever Buddy#my brother and i when speckles finally kills one eyed: yoooo YOOOOOO#movie would have heen better with like 98% more blood but when they did sue blood they used both cgi and fake irl#which i'll admit was kinda cool#fuck you one eye i fucking hate you#ok anywaus we tried watching khumba but didnt bc it was getting late so we watched the first 20mins and then skipped to the end#i think it wouldve been a nice movie? i have no idea but i mean i didnt hate what i saw#if you guys rver wanna watch a movie just got to free with ads on youtube ive been obsessing over those for months now#btw dino movies are very boring to me i forgot to add that. so yeah dino king IS boring to me but i had fun
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pathsofoak · 11 months
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I tried to build Justin's house/farm in the Sims last night and I regret to announce its mental image in my head breaks the laws of physics and therefore it cannot be visualized
#Look. I just want the outside walls of both floors to be precisely on top of each other even though the downstairs hallway#and landing upstairs are right on top of each other#yet the rooms attached to them are deeper on the ground floor than on the first floor#also the entry downstairs is as deep as the bedroom right beside it which is also about three times as deep as the entry hope that helps#and the basic shape of the house is one large rectangle on both floors even though the backside of the house on the top floors has nothing#there and is practically unreachable#could I fix this by looking up some floorplans online and revising my idea? Yes. Do I want to? Ehhhhhh#I also have this problem with the camper they use to get around throughout parts 2 and 3 because I keep forgetting that Brenda and Chuck#excluded no one in this story is nearly as small as I am so I keep underestimating how much space they'll need#Technically I took care of it by putting little narrow bunks over the twin bed in the back of the camper and adding in an extra backseat#(making the camper quite long but fine)#and it already had convertible driver's and passenger's seats plus one of those foldable sleeping areas up top#but this is a recurring problem#I'm gonna build the WCKD facilities from part 4 after I solve the farm problem that's gonna be fun#I would love to build the house they all live in after everything's over but it relies on attic space and custom-design beds which the sims#is simply not capable of doing justice to#so. I guess I'll practice some drawing skills though I don't think that's a project I'll finish in the near future
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ferberus-skull · 1 year
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trying to get back into the swing of things. somehow got the inspiration to make a new skin. which i haven't done since 2021.
but i completely forgot that i hate the skin printing process and managing a thread so so much. why am i doing this again.
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