i dont like the idea that kids these days are doing their fandom rps with ai chatbots. that's how you're supposed to make lifelong friends as a weird really online teen.

A Less Obvious Toxic RPer: The Overaplogizer

I see a lot of RP resource blogs that talk about toxic RP partners in the cases of people who are overtly controlling, aggressive, demanding, and/or cruel, but rarely if ever do I see posts about a different sort of toxicity: The over-apologizer. These RPers don’t get defensive or aggressive, they get so submissive and self-hating and apologetic over the SLIGHTEST criticism or even suggestion. It’s not a problem of “not saying sorry” it’s a problem of TOO MUCH sorry. Here are some examples: Sally: “Hey there, I know we planned for our muses to end up together eventually, but some of your recent asks seem to suggest they’re already a close  couple. I was hoping for a longer slow-burn sort of thing, moving in too fast will definitely scare my muse off. Could we dial it back a bit?” Bill: “I’m so sorry, I completely fucked up! Please don’t hate me ! I should never have started RPing! Let’s just drop the whole thing I’m sorry I wasted your time!” Sally: “Hey, so in your last reply, you had a whole bunch of spiders come out of the walls. I probably should have mentioned this before, but spiders are kind of a trigger of mine. Could we change that to something else?” Bill: “OMG I’m so sorry I’m such an asshole! I should delete my blog, I’m so terrible at this! This is why nobody likes me!” Sally: “Hey, I really love our threads, but our last three have all focused on my muse saving and comforting yours, and the new plot you just suggested seems the same. I like writing with you, but I was wondering if this time around, your muse could help mine instead?” Bill: “I hate myself, I’m such a selfish prick. I push everyone off, why did I think this would be different?” Sally: “I love talking to you OOC, but could you stop messaging me about New Show? I’m just not really interested in that.” Bill: “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to annoy you, I’ll just shut up now. I’m sorry I’m such a loser.” So, why is this bad? Well, for one thing, insulting yourself isn’t what someone’s aim is when they ask you to change something or cease a behavior. It makes the Sally in this situation feel bad, like they’ve just bullied you, when all they’ve done is politely communicate a reasonable request. It changes the topic of the conversation from Sally communicating a need about RP, to Sally having to personally reassure Bill that she doesn’t hate him, he isn’t a terrible RPer, etc. This is really, really uncomfortable for the Sally, and usually, in my experience as a Sally, ends up taking a lot of time and emotional labor all focused on Sally comforting Bill and apologizing a lot herself simply for speaking up about something bothering her. All of this combines to making Sally more and more unlikely to voice any further concerns or requests to Bill, because she doesn’t want to go through this again and again. Which means Sally either suffers through threads that bother her in some way and aren’t fun for her. . .or she gets tired of that and just ghosts. This sucks for both Sally and Bill. Now, I don’t think most people are trying to be deliberately manipulative when they act like Bill. Some certainly are and I hate them, but it can also be that they’re genuinely extremely insecure, anxious people who think they have to over-correct due to either mental issues, trauma/abuse in the past, or both. So I genuinely try to be patient and kind, but I won’t lie, it is still manipulative and it gets my hackles up. It leaves me conflicted between wanting to comfort the person and reassure them, and at the same time being pissed at them. It’s definitely a frustrating experience. And honestly? I still don’t actually know how to handle this when I’m in the Sally position. So I tried to do the next best thing, and write this for the Bills out there, who might not REALIZE this is toxic behavior or why. Bills, you’re not a bad person, and I know this behavior can be hard to rein in, especially when it’s a trauma response, but please do what you can to try! I wish I had advice for how, but I don’t. All I can do is point out that this behavior, while it may have helped you survive a bad situation in the past, is actually really shitty to others now. And if someone WANTS this behavior from you? If someone WANTS you to scrape and grovel and insult yourself when they point out the slightest thing wrong? Get the hell away from them, because that’s toxic as hell too.

🤩 Who is someone in your rpc that you admire?

Unconventional munday asks!

🤩 Who is someone in your rpc that you admire?

(( aside from yourself? owo. whose positivity and passion is ALWAYS inspiring? well, i'm gonna limit myself to listing a few people here because if i list everyone, i will be here ALL day -

@midgarwhispers | amazing plots, mature & down to earth discussion, incredible writing, interesting muse, great GREAT dynamics, lovely ooc chat. i have so much admiration for this sweet lil carbuncle ( i say lil, she a giant ) - i've just had so many fun discussions and plots this year with her & ooc-wise, i cannot stress how kind & lovely she is. i just - urgh - 10/10 - massively recommend.

@stingslikeabee | when wont i waffle on about mari and how much i love her? you want mature, well-written content? you want an interesting oc who can squeeze into any kind of universe? you want a down-to-earth, interesting & intelligent mun with whom you can chatter everything from adult chat to films & culture? mari's a legend. i will forever simp.

@cloudvii | anything sayj touches turns to gold, honestly. not to say cloud wasn't already gold but - look - i admire sayj's passion and interest in their muses. their headcanons are in depth and powerful, but they're never without reason. like - they always make sense & make you do a double take and a little 'ahhhh!' when you read them because they're so interesting & in tune with the character. i just really adore what sayj does with the characters that they pick up. and their respect / appreciation for og? *mwah*.

@phoenix-flamed | hot damn, vonny. where do i even begin? i didn't follow vonny until fairly recently-ish. i jumped on them on my sylv blog and was barely there so HAD to grab em with heid and i just- the rpc should consider itself blessed to have such a wonderful write & a wonderful person in their midst. vonny's elwin is so incredibly weaved that i would read a book about him written by them; i always admire someone who picks up a side-character but someone who then gives that side character a well-crafted story, interesting headcanons and pushes it all with infectious enthusiasm and passion? sign me the F up. like, GODDAMN. and as a person? vonny is so incredibly sweet, someone i'd love to bug more honestly because wow. & on a personal note, someone who did something recently for me that really helped me in a great & personal way. i just - <3 - so much love and respect in my soul for this one.

@svnsworn | light is somebody who if you say to me 'recommend a user', im gonna recommend her. she jumps to the forefront of my mind like a lil froggy. i always mess up when trying to run multis but she makes it look EASY. the AMOUNT of times that light has told me a headcanon about a character and i've gone 'holy shit! of course!' she has that knack for spotting those details, and then expanding on them. and no matter who she chooses - from leon to luna - she injects this love & insight into them that they truly deserve. she's really incredible and there isn't a day i wouldn't recommend her. and as a person? light is always lovely. like, alwAYS.

@rikelusshinra & @ofgeneticperfection & @ivory-paragon & @steeleidolon | I DIDN'T WANNA KEEP LISTING EVERYONE CAUSE IF I DO THAT I'LL CRY CAUSE THERE'S SO MANY AMAZING PEOPLE TO WRITE AMAZING THINGS ABOUT BUT I DID WANNA MENTION THESE GUYS -

i look at them and i see original final fantasy vii. i see a love and passion for the media that has spanned years. i see these unique insights into characters / ocs & i just admire them a lot. i see them as being like, the people that all ffvii rpers should look up to and aspire to be. i just admire them a lot & love seeing them on my dash.

18. What makes for a great roleplay partner in your opinion?

19. Have you received anon hate? If so, how do you deal with it?

Questions for the mun! Accepting!

18. What makes for a great roleplay partner in your opinion?

Ok this is something I've been exploding about (positively) recently but. the people who take your headcanons and incorporate them into their replies? Oh my god I'd kiss them on the mouth platonically

It's the best feeling, genuinely, when someone takes your headcanons and weaves them into the observations/introspection of their own muse.

I'd like to shoutout two people who did this recently with me! @grislyintentions who made me lose my mind I went insane with this part of their response in a thread of ours:

Amusing. How quick he always is to sacrifice all that he is. It does compel the curious question: Does such a man possess any capacity, even in moments of weakness, to be selfish?

Like. holy shit. This blew me away I loved it so much. And Kafka's use of the phrase "self-punishing," which I'd never once explicitly mentioned to A was a flaw of Jing Yuan's at all at that moment, but they knew. And they were very correct! And I just HIFUDHFJDJFJ HOUGH!!

The second person is @celestial-narwhal who I've been writing with for a long time, about four years now! She's always always incredible when it comes to call-and-response in terms of headcanons and indulgences, as well as knowing which buttons to press and the limits of what her muses would know and/or observe. One of my favorite examples of this is her nod to my ideas regarding Jing Yuan's divine nature and responding with Luocha's own, and it's just. Hough. That's the good shit dude that's the good shit right there.

TLDR: read! your partners'! headcanons! and utilize them!!! they are there for a reason and that's the biggest way to show you're an attentive RPer. Also like your partners' headcanons to show you read them that's super important

19. Have you received anon hate? If so, how do you deal with it?

If I did, I don't remember!

Real answer is no, I haven't. Everyone has been really nice and kind to me for the most part throughout my RP experience. I have dealt with someone trying to whiteknight for me though. That was unpleasant. You've heard that story!

I've followed your other blog for a while, I was wondering if you recommend any roleplayers to try giving a shot at rping with?

I'll take a wild guess you're askin' specifically about Haz.bin / Hell.uva RPers since you sent this in to my Adam blog lol. But, honestly, I may not be the best to ask for recommendations. I have yet to interact with too many Haz.bin roleplays or really get to know any but out the gate I do believe I do have a few I'd recommended out of the people my picky ass has come to like over time via talking with them or watching them interact with friends.

@cxncrie / Star who's a friend of mine is someone I'd definitely recommend. She writes Alastor, Charlie, Lute, some other canons as well as some of her OCs plus a canon muse that's crossed over into Haz.bin. She's been great to talk to and write with, is rather patient with me despite how horrifically slow I write, has been consistently kind to me, and is the reason I'm even still in the Tumblr RPC funnily enough. All the stuff she writes is great, her writing is worth consuming. She's also one of the few people that seem to clearly communicate with her partners anymore or, at least, try to as much as you can when a bunch of people seem allergic to it. All around Star is great and someone I'd always recommend following / writing with if you vibe with her and aren't already writing with her. Also, her OC Nimue is great. Like. One of the few OCs I would ever genuinely recommend and is the first OC in a long time I willingly shipped some of my canon muses with on my other blog.

@shadowzgather / Tera is also great. I have yet to actually get proper threads fully going with her, albeit that's the fault of my slow ass more than anything, but Tera has been great thus far as I said. She communicates, cares about her muses, and writes them quite well from what I've seen. It's been fun watching her and Star write their stuff with Pentious and Nimue. Not to mention Tera does write the funny snake man quite well and is probably someone I'd consider making my main Pentious on my other blog. I do really like how Tera tries to do more with him despite how he was mostly a joke in canon, trying to emphasize how he can be more serious and isn't just a joke while also managing to keep Pentious. Well. Pentious. It's pretty neat to me how she manages to make him more serious while also keeping the quirks that make Pentious himself. This is to say I like how she manages it without accidentally turning him into an OC wearing his skin like I've seen happen with other characters with other writers.

@xluciifer / Luci isn't someone I've had a lot of chance to write with, again because I'm a slowass bitch, but Luci is also like one of the few Lucifer roleplayers I genuinely like. I've privately recommended Luci to people before but, hey, here's a fuckin' public recommendation now. They genuinely put thought and effort into writing Lucifer, they actually looked into scripture for writing him. He isn't just "quirky and depressed father" with them. He isn't just "omg innocent wittle man who did no wrong" with them. He isn't just "husband to Lilith !! omg precious ship!!". They also don't write Lucifer just to shit on Adam like I've seen several other Lucifer writers do. They have Lucifer be hostile to Adam a realistic and in character amount based off how they choose to write Lucifer. They're like a god damn blessing because I thought I'd never meet a Lucifer roleplayer who wanted to write with my Adam that didn't want to either harass / bully him, straight up murder him, or try and get me to write Adamsapple as an autoship. They're also just very sweet to speak with and quite nice to speak to OOC when we have / do talk now. Very nice writer, splendid take on Lucifer.

@edenhazbin / This is someone I have yet to properly write with, but from what I've seen myself and heard from friends, I've come to enjoy her interpretation of Cain. It's been quite interesting to watch Cain's interactions with Star's OC Nimue. Also, her Cain is just an interesting take to me because I typically saw people interpret Cain as some sort of evil, malicious, violent hellion. Making him unnecessarily violent and malicious to all, like some sort of edgy overpowered villain OC, but her Cain isn't that and is quite an interesting difference from that usual I tended to see.

I'm sure there's plenty more people I could recommend here but I'll stick to just recommending these four for now since I feel comfortable with recommending them. And this isn't to say I dislike anyone I didn't recommend or anyone who writes the same muses as those I did recommend. These people are just who I felt most comfortable recommending due to being friends with them, people I've talked to OOC, or people who know friends of mine.

Below the cut is all of the responses that were in the inbox related to Fandom Problem 3954 and the subsequent asks. These will be all of the ones that were sent as anonymous.

The following ask came in on April 19:

I just want to say I appreciate the DID asks on this blog. It was a nice sanity check for me. One of my friend's kids who is in high school got sucked into it, he started "switching" at 17, and she's getting him to go to therapy to find the source of the problem, but he's apparently really argumentative with the psychologist and keeps insisting he only has DID, for very wrong reasons. Symptoms that don't match any kind of DID I've seen. His mum was really careful to find someone who was familiar with DID, I know she wouldn't send him to someone who doesn't know what they're doing because shes amazingly good with google-fu, so it can't be because the psychologist doesn't know what DID is or how to spot it. For a while the whole thing made me feel a bit crazy because his obviously fake symptoms and onset (?) didn't match how adamant he was that he had DID, I was starting to believe him too. I want to thank the asks for resetting my perspective. He certainly needs help it just isn't going to be help for DID.

Here are the ones from April 17 and they are out of order because of how I added them from the inbox:

1:

I'm in college and know multiple people who are barely even minors anymore who just started faking tourette's out of the blue. One day they just showed up and started doing tics. Obviously fake tics for that reason, also because it's obvious they have a brief "wind up" period before them when they look like they're contemplating just how to pull off tics. They're all neck tics and arm tics too, nothing is ugly or painful. So I can confirm a lot more people are faking these things than people think. Dhar Mann even made a good skit about it because it's such a popular thing for kids (even college age adults who have trouble making connections and getting attention) to do

2:

Oh god this is syscourse

It shows up on my dash once in a blue moon and I never have any idea that the fuck people are taking about. All I know is it has two sides who both despise each other and years of grudges

3:

just wanna say that i'm glad most people here seem to have sensible takes regarding the "DID" boom online

4:

As someone who knows someone who uses a system and has DID, the anon that said they were not responsible for making someone feel safe in the discord server is awful.

That anon makes my blood boil because it literally happened to my friend who has a system. My friend's fictive is part of who they are, and it is them. They have the right to feel uncomfortable when people do strange things with the character the fictive is.

In my friend's case, they had been in that server before the rper had joined. But the server mods decided to take my friend's "character rights" away since they said "technically you aren't rping as the character, so someone else can have them." Would you all agree with the mods in this case?

Y'all saying people with systems who are uncomfortable with how people portray characters that are their fictives should just accept it do not get it.

Would you be okay with someone portraying a real life person in a different way?

Would you be okay with people rping as real people?

If the answer is no to both of these, then y'all should understand why people with fictives feel uncomfortable with people portraying their ficitives in such ways.

5:

Replying to a comment on 714814266546470912: "that doctor literally took videos from their tiktoks without permission" Bruh, first off, someone does not need permission to share something that was posted publicly on a public website. Once you post something to the internet, it's fair game. This is why adults tell you to never put something online unless you want it to be there forever, because once it's up, it's up for good, and people can save it, share it, edit it, however they want. If someone has posted selfies on the internet, someone has probably saved them, for whatever reason, because they thought the pictures were cute, because they're collecting dirt on them, etc, and even if that's not the case, the data will always be there. Maybe it's not pristine ethics to share videos of minors, young adults, etc with mental disorders (not DID, obviously they have something else like factitious disorder), but it's not illegal at all. And if you actually watched the video (which I doubt), you would know the doctor, faculty, etc had covered all legal bases by repeatedly saying they cannot diagnose anyone over the internet or thought videos. Repeatedly. And they were strictly looking at the behaviors which they see regularly in people who fake, behaviors which are a strong indication (but, again for legal reasons, not a guarantee) someone is faking. They said this. You really need to brush up on your knowledge of laws, most of all in medicine, research, studies, etc and actually using nuanced thinking.

6:

Sorry to add to the fire but in my fandom I see LOTS of "traumagenic systems" (DID) who also claim to "support endos". That raises so many red flags too because if someone really did have DID and was well educated on it as a result, they would know how DID really works and they wouldn't in a hundred years support people who are pretending to have something with totally wrong, obvious fake symptoms and consider them "part of the community". I guess it makes it easy to know who to block though?

7:

I want to thank the person who sent 714815628520898560 for sharing that video, I watched it this morning during my shift and it was really insightful!! I learned a lot :)

8:

I’m thinking about Roman genius and Juno spirits, and also of the post made by EarlGrayTay about how the English language struggles with nuance, when it comes to degrees of intensity.

We don’t have a word for something between having some tulpas and having DID, and so people are saying they have the latter even when they don’t clinically qualify. I do think that in most cases people who self diagnose with DID are more likely to be closer to the tulpa end than the disordered end.

Also, as memory stuff is part of it, it’s entirely possible that the apparent excess of people with DID in fandom is because the nature of the internet allows for pseudo-sockpuppeting, with multiple personalities creating different accounts, potentially unaware of what the others, as memory is a big part of the diagnosis

9:

714820580417863680 2% of the world's population as of 2020 is 156 million people.

Say that again, slowly.

156 million people do not have DID.

10:

These asks are wild lol. My thoughts are, fine, maybe "endogenic systems" exist in the context of not being actual DID, but if someone really thinks they can have multiple identities or parts without having trauma to predicate that, well, I hate to say but that's basically a religious belief at that point, and not even remotely related to a medical disorder. The human brain usually has one continuous, cohesive identity. Unless, like someone already mentioned, you experience harrowing trauma in your early childhood. You can call yourself a tulpa, you can call yourself endogenic, you can believe you have fifty fictional introjects, five different Resident Evil characters living in your head, but that doesn't make it science. If you want endogenic systems to exist, call it what it is: a religion. And stop trying to bully and force your way into getting medicine to accept these ridiculous things, because it will never happen

11:

Got diagnosed with did in my 20s. Here’s a thing most of the issues I’ve had with the online system community in general. Also this phone im typing on doesn’t show text cause tumblr so ye spelling mistakes a plenty.

1: the whole community regardless of endo or traumagenic is kinds crap. Came to it for resources on how to manage things like persecutors and understand wtf was up. Covid was a wild time. Therapist officially diagnosed me in 21. Why is this important, cause the whole ass community hted endos or trauma or whatever and all unanimously hated tiktok

2: the whole fictive debate became even more dumb when there were 50 different i ndividaula claiming to be a fictive from genshin. Really weird. Cause the peeps in multiple communities threw a fit making those name close cultures. Personally i think it was due to so many fictives or some blue haired guy?

3: the fact people treated it like fictionkin something i thought i had because yknow issues with dissociation well the fictives got treated more like kinning

4: the biggest thing is the community allowed delusional attachments to become such a common place thing. I get it identity be fucky but its an issue when delusional attachment’s cone into play. Mainly cause most if not all system communities used carrds and tiktok as resources.

5 or 6? Cause phone be fucky: despite claiming to hate endos the community was nothyper critical to self dxing without reseach and minors self dxing. There’s a lotta reasons why it normally os pouring gasoline on a fire.

Finally most system communities are primarily white and it shows cause of how much they prioritize racial relations and closed cultures along with treating introjects like shit.

So the submission about bein a fictive whos tired of people treating em like they’re gonna be identical as the character iscorrect. Rampant problem

12:

Re: all this DID stuff and certain people digging in in the comments to defend what they're doing, I think it's interesting to contemplate not just why people do this for DID delusions, but also for fandom things in general because I think it applies to both (and to keep things a little more on topic, ha). I read a comment recently where someone was talking about personal truths, which are subjective feelings and beliefs, and social truths, which are laws and social constructs. When someone loves themselves and has confidence, they're able to maintain personal truths that may differ from other people without feeling threatened, and they can maintain those personal truths or values. This is what happens when someone has strong feelings about characters, or identifies with a character, but is able to witness people sharing opinions without going to war over them.

On the other hand, people who have insecurities and a lack of self confidence (or worth) will fight to make personal truths into social truths, to make up for that self loathing. They feel they can force society to accept their personal truths to make them feel comfortable, because they can't derive any actual comfort from simply existing with their personal truths that differ so much from social truths. This is what happens when you have, like a lot of confessions lately have mentioned, people bullying others over headcanons, calling them bigots for not sharing a gay ship or something. Or when people have low self-esteem and might be struggling with mental health problems, and are trying desperately to find answers and find self-worth, but have accidentally opted for something that is not a social truth, but a personal truth (believing they have DID when it is very obviously not), and so they fight tooth and nail to make that warped version of DID into something officially recognized. That is the only way they can get validation beyond their bubble. I think it's a growing problem not only because it seems like the world is kinda imploding right now and people need some kind of stability, when personal truths may not suffice for that because of the above issues with self-confidence or insecurities, but also because we've reached the point where kids are growing up without ever NOT having known social media, and they have near-constant access to that social media, which makes for an increasingly bad precedent. Not just for kids, adults with underdeveloped coping strategies are susceptible too.

13:

I'm pleasantly surpirsed by the convo around DID here, because I read the post and was half expecting a horde of endogenic or willowgenic or (word)genic systems to come stampeding in here calling everyone ableists lol, I'm kinda relieved there hasn't been a bunch of that

14:

Honestly laughing at how a word like sysmed exists. Are people "sadmeds" or "anhemeds" for telling someone they're faking depression? Are people "schizomeds" for saying people are faking schizophrenia? This is absurd and it's ao fricking offensive to compare the above to being a transmedicalist.

So fellers, I can't promise that this'll be the last post I make about them. They don't fucking listen when they're the reason why nothing's going their way. I may be petty, but blocking, reporting, and IP banning them with the handy dandy statcounter is STRONGLY recommended (if you can afford to anyway, statcounter has a monthly payment thing).

I personally suspect that they have an alt account that none of us are aware of, and I'll say with full confidence that I could be wrong.

I started knowing they existed on account of their dry writing and their godmodding, and after, they'd start to ask a mutual some intrusive and condescending messages on why they're so kind to me. Not my character apparently, me. They don't bother to learn character names and just use URLs to shit talk. They'd ask why there's fanart of my woof child and their muse, which lmao, why's that a fucking problem? Mind your own beezwax. They would also bombard that mutual with asks about their shadowban issue, why can the mutual see other people's asks instead of theirs, and the most the mutual could do was tell them what it means and how they can fix it (which they never did). And as you might've seen earlier, they said me drawing fanart of fictional characters was "weird" and talked about it like it was self insert art I was doing. Self insert art's not even an issue to begin with but yet they took it personally lmao. Perish. Also I wouldn't make my self insert be a fucking child, and the art wasn't even shippy in the slightest.

It got to the point where my mutual blocked them, and they moved onto a Vegeta blog, and really milked that cow dry for how long they'd keep messaging them and whining about them not jivin' with the godmodding, along with complaining to that Vegeta and someone else about everyone making bad comments about their oc. If you look into their blog, you'll see that this person does not have a bio what so ever. Not even in a separate post. So quite clearly they're just expecting everyone to submit to her Mary Sue powers despite the fact we know nothing about them. They even info dumped the same Vegeta through an ask which, dude. Limited text. Look it up.

And then, they would bombard a Raditz rper and bitch about how he's not submitting to their random stranger shit while Raditz accepted a fucking BLT from one of my adult muses, bombard an oc blog like "you're flirting with Raditz, I can tell, your oc's not any better than MINE", AND, try to act like they're such a hotshot at writing, which as you might've guessed, they're not. And they're actively painting themselves in a bad light instead of listening to people and accepting boundaries. They also bugged the shit out of a Beerus mutual, and another mutual who writes ocs, just 'cause the other's muse was just vibin' and giving Beerus food. There's literally nothing wrong with that, yet they'd keep bugging the other mutual with shit like "oh beerus is only keeping you around 'cause you're giving him food, beerus isn't nice blahblahblah".

Do you see a pattern here? They'll get pissy when they don't get any attention from all four of those characters, and send jealous, petty bitch-sounding messages over two friggin children that are just being nice. Imagine being jealous of a fucking child. Actually suck in that shame like a juice box, 'cause that is PATHETIC. Jealousy is legitimately not a healthy thing to have, especially over something like roleplay, and when you actively guilt trip or shit talk them just 'cause of that, that's even more pathetic. And hella possessive. Good luck being possessive when the muns aren't interested in your oc to begin with lmao.

They also chased off somebody after stalking them for a full on year, as I've been told, which from people saying "that explains a lot" when I said who they were, that's...unsettling. Not surprising, but unsettling. And they're suspected to be another individual named Skye. I dunno if that's true but that's why I say "suspected."

TLDR; Please for your own sanity, block @phoenixissims and report them for their harassment. Do whatever you can to keep them far away from you as possible. The Dragon Ball side of the RPC is not the only RPC they've harassed over the years, so it isn't their first rodeo with being annoying and creepy. Do not waste your time with a message.

Now with all that out of the way, phoenixissims, go fuck yourself with a pitchfork, and everyone else? Have a nice rest of the month. I'm going back to my usual tomfoolery.

😈 🎢🤩 for the emoji asks! :)

Thank you! (ask from here)

😈 Has there been a point in a story where you did something just to be playfully mean to your readers?

Oh uh. Hmm. I'm not sure. I ... don't think so. It's rare I'm thinking of "readers" when writing something, unless it's a gift fic, in which case I am usually just trying my best to deliver on the prompt that I was given. OR I'm thinking of readers and trying to do something they will like.

Although. I might be close with something upcoming, we'll see.

🎢 Which of your fics would you call your wildest ride?

I feel like for me to consider my writing a wild ride... it would need to be on the longer side and I really only have a few fics that are long enough to even like. Qualify?

I guess simply because it's the longest and actually has a completed like "arc" I'll choose Poison Paradise. I haven't actually managed to do that with any of my other longfics. But it doesn't really feel like a "wild ride" to me.

Unless you mean the actual writing process, in which case Who's the Mutt Now?. It's not finished and never will be, but I fucking ate dog food as part of writing that fic.

🤩 Who is your favorite character to write?

What kind of terrible question is thissss aaaa. I love writing so many characterssss.

Marco from One Piece is definitely up there. I love tragedy of immortality and he is so great for it just with (spoilers: all the loved ones who die in canon while he can't).

Seto Kaiba from Yugioh also has to be on this list. I can't have been a Seto Kaiba RPer for that long and not even mention him. That man has carried so much projection I can't even. (And also a fair amount of confidence that I don't/didn't posses but have gotten better about through him. I went through so much with Seto Kaiba.)

James Bonde gives me so few problems when writing, his voice is clear and I feel like he makes sense to me and like he always can fill his narrative purpose without going ooc. That's very nice to write because it comes easily. I love him coaching Louis in Poison Paradise. He's kind of this nice mixture between light/silly and serious so he doesn't ever get on my nerves or pull the story directions I don't want it to like Sherlock, but he doesn't make the story as heavy as other characters seem to. Very nice breath of fresh air.

Honestly, I think I genuinely enjoy writing the side characters more than the main ones with yuumori even if the main ones are my favorite characters. That's a little silly, isn't it?

But I will stay silly :3

🔥

🔥:  This  one  is  really  just  a  personal  peeve,  but  people  who  look  for  other  people  to  block  in  the  rpc  are  uncomfy  af  to  me.  Like,  I  just  don’t  think  anyone  has  any  reason  to  scoot  around  the  rpc  blocking  random  people  they’ve  never  interacted  with  before  &  who  are  otherwise  not  doing  any  type  of  harm  or  posting  any  kind  of  “harmful”  content  &  couldn’t  really  be  bothering  them  in  any  way. 

LIKE  its  fair  to  make  an  exception  to  this  if  the  blockee  is  close  to  /  interacting  with  someone  who  is  “problematic”  or  who  has  done  harm  to  the  blocker, but  they  really  should  AT  LEAST  avoid  treating  the  blockee  like  someone  who  is  out  to  get  them  personally  when  they’re  no  where  near  them  &  probably  don’t  even  know  about  anything  the  person  they’re  interacting  with  did,  nor  is  it  likely  that  they  condone  it  or  would  patriciate  in  it  themselves. 

But  people  are  def  the  weird  to  me  when  they  stumble  upon  someone  else’s  blog  &  feel  the  need  to  block  them  because  of   nothing.   Like  the  people  that  get  upset  when  they see  someone  who  seems  to  have  more  rp  partners,  threads,  friends,  ships,  nicer  graphics,  more  complex  hcs,  etc  than  them.  ( WHICH  IMO,  I  really  think  feels  red-flaggy.  I  remember  when  people  used  to  go  BATSHIT  at  people  for  having  “high-follower”  counts  &  that  was  ugly  ass  envy  &  imo  a  lot  of  the  time  so  is  this. ) 

This  is  super  common  with  dupes  because  ““dupe  anxiety””  but  its  also  taken  off  just  as  a  general  conduct  thing  &  I  really  hate  it,  imo.  I  think  its  really  not  suited  for  something  that  is  meant  to  be  a  community  environment  /  experience.  There  is  nothing  more  awkward  than  stumbling  upon  a  random  person  in  your  fandom  who  has  you  hard-blocked  for  no  noticeable  reason.  Like  sure  its  their  “”right””,  but  its  my  right  to  think  thats  weird  &  probably  unnecessary.  Like,  I  can’t  imagine  being  that  pressed  by  the  existence  of  someone  who  has  done  nothing  to  me.  Like  if  your  mental  health  is  so  negatively  impacted  by  the  perceived  success  of  a  total  stranger  who  is  not  doing  a  single  thing  wrong,  let  alone  doing  anything  toward  you, it  feels  like  maybe  a  community  environment  isn’t  the  most  suited  for  people  who  have  those  kind  of  issues ? 

&  I’m  sorry  but  MOREOVER,  9  times  out  of  10  when  people  are  feeling  the  “need”  to  be  blocking  other  rpers  who  don’t  engage  with  them,  they  don’t  just  stop  at  blocking.  That  need  is  coming  from  a  weird  place  so  not  everyone  is  content  with  “blocking”  someone  &  going  about  their  day.  They  gotta  be  looking  for  reasons  to  justify  their  “feelings”  &  if  they  can’t  find  or  twist  things  to  make  reasons  they’ll  just  make  them  up  cos  that  feels  better  to  a  lot  of  people  than  simply  acknowledging  that  have  jealousy  issues  &  managing  themselves.  Because  honestly  blocking  rarely  ever  solves  this  type  of  “”issue””  in  the  first  place  because  there's  not  really  anything  blocking  can  do  to  someone  who  doesn’t  follow  /  interact  with  you.  Literally  nothing,  tbh.  The  only  thing  blocking  does  is  stop  someone  from  following  you  &  removes  their  ability  to  contact  you  on  the  blog  you  blocked.  How  does  that  solve  anything  if  the  person  doesn’t  talk  to  you  &  doesn’t  follow  you  in  the  first  place,  its  really  the  stupidest  thing  when  you  actually  think  about  it  &  to  insist  to  everyone  who  finds  this  behaviour  off  putting  that  there  is  rarely  hostile  or  shady  motives  behind  it  just  feels  a  little  gaslight-y  to  me  with  all  that  in  consideration. (  &  completely  contrary  to  my  lived  experience  with  this  type  of  thing,  hence  my  problem  with  it. ) 

This  works  fine  in  normal  fandom  environments,  by  the  way.  Like  for  example  you’re  blocking  someone  because  you’re  sick  of  seeing  their  flaming  hot-takes  or  awkward  headcanons  in  your  fandom  /  character  /  ship  tags.  You  don’t  have  to  have  ever  followed  or  interacted  with  that  person  for  blocking  them  to  have  benefits  for  you  in  that  respect  because  you’re  encountering  them  in  a  very  public  place.  But  rp is  totally  different.  We  USUALLY  don’t  post  ourselves  in  fandom  tags.  We  usually  don't  try  to  exist  in  public  places  from  the  get-go.  We’re  all  kind  of  restricted  to  our  little  communities  were  you’re  probably  not  gonna  be  seeing  much  of  someone  if  you’re  not  following  them,  least  of  all  their  “opinions”  or  “headcanons”  or  “ships”,  that  might  rub  you  wrong,  unless  you  are  actively  visiting  their  blog  &  looking  at  their  content  directly. You’re  only  gonna  see  them  on  your  dash  if  your  rp  partners  are  writing  with  them  &  blocking  will  not  solve  that.  Filters  solve  that.  Filtering  out  the  URLs  should  be  where  it  ends.  It  doesn’t  give  any  hostile,  discouraging  (even  if  unintentional)  signals  to  anyone  who  doesn't  deserve  them  &  preserves  the  community  spirit.  But  thats  just  my  opinion  on  that,  heavily  influenced  by  unpleasant  experiences. 

I’m old, I’m tired, and I have a massive headache right now. I want to just knock this stuff out so I can be done with it and move on because honestly, I’m sitting here trying to think of WHAT the fuck half of this shit on the callout means. So I’ll be putting all talking points under readmore and tagging it accordingly. But I just need to straighten out my own thoughts. And maybe answer the questions people might’ve had about it but were too afraid to ask.

“ manipulation (most commonly using self-harm and suicide), abuse, vague-blogging, rallying others to attack various people, intimidation towards others into silence “

I haven’t talked about my suicidal tendency for a couple of years now, in fact, recently I had someone use that tactic on ME which is why I cut her off, she had made my whole server anxious to the point nobody wanted to confront her and because I had gotten angry about that, she had told me that she told someone ELSE she was considering self harm. I have NEVER used my suicidal thoughts against anyone. I don’t really tell people outside of my server about how I feel in that regard. Do I make jokes about dying? Yeah. But that’s how I cope and that’s my dark humor. 

No. I have not vague blogged, not in years. I made that mistake when I was younger and I have not done it since. I’ve gone off on people who have vague blogged and the person who THOUGHT I vague blogged never bothered to talk to me and find out that I was talking in general. This person also seemed to think the world revolves around her but I don’t want to get into that.

I don’t have the energy to rally attacks, Yes I’ll admit, I DID standby when I witnessed a rally of attack against someone instead of putting a stop to it, but it didn’t occur to me how bad it really was until afterwards when I pieced together this group of people had actually broken her friends off from her. I am NOT going to go into detail because the person who was attacked passed away. If any of her friends see this post, I apologize that I did not put a stop to it and that I let it happen. I hope you’re all genuinely doing well. 

If me being angry when I’m wronged is intimidating, you’ve got only yourself to blame honestly. People are allowed to be angry, to be upset. I never once intimidated anyone into silence. Why the fuck would I do that? The same’s been done to me so I’m a little lost on that but okay.

“ Force-shipper. Almost everyone who has brought me information has had this rper force them into a ship, and abuse them when they did not wish to do so “

Hate to be the bearer of bad news but honey? I barely ship. I’ve actually had ships shoved down MY throat on multiple occasions. I RARELY get excitable for the very reason of not wanting to upset my partners. I am VERY PICKY in general about shipping because I became shipping fodder for people or I’ve had ships cut off due to friends breaking up or otherwise. The most I do is gently offer, but I have never told someone that they HAVE to ship with me or else kind of thing. 

In fact, all my partners that have cut me off have shoved ships we’ve had down my throat and honestly?? I didn’t say shit. I just went with the flow. I have a habit of not saying anything. Yeah, it’s a terrible habit. But I’d rather not say anything instead of risking setting people off. Why? Because I’m tired and I don’t want to deal with this shit. 

Thank you for attempting a smear campaign but unfortunately I’m willing to actually admit to what I HAVE done wrong since I’ve become a better person since the things I have done.

What made you want to write Souji? When did you decide to make him more canon divergent? Do you miss PMK roleplayers? What’s your favorite part about writing Souji? How did you come up for the idea for Ayato?

Send anons asking things you’ve wondered about my muse, me, or the blog in general! (accepting) @fckin-bubbles-multi

Kasey you're a doll and I love you so much!!!

Firstly I had actually watched Hakuouki and had been on a Shinsengumi binge when I was like "I wanna roleplay a Shinsengumi member but no one in Hakuouki is calling to me... Oh I know Imma watch my fave Shinsengumi anime!!" and so I grabbed my boxset of Peacemaker and after watching it it was like.. he was around the corner, peeking out going "...Hijikata-san??" and it was like "YES I WILL PLAY THIS BOY"

He became canon-divergent (or basically canon what canon??) when all the Shinsengumi rpers started falling away. School, work, family, other interests... one by one they started either moving to new characters or leaving the site completely. I was surrounded by OCs and modern muses, and Souji had to adapt to survive in the changing times. In the 8 or so years I've been roleplaying him he's changed quite a bit, but I'd like to think the core parts that make Souji who is remain (even if he doesn't fight nearly as much as he used to)

Boy oh boy PMK rpers are hard to come by!! Even when I started they were. In fact, for a long time, it was just me and @byakushisakura-rp who did any PMK rp. The rest of my Shinsengumi fandom fam were Hakuouki. They were kind enough to adopt my Souji so he has a lot of history with them. I'm lucky to have @youmatou-kaiken still as a PMK rper (and @peacemaking-gunslinger when Izzy isn't busy with things) but many others have fallen away which makes me sad. It's my hope that Chrono-sensei will finish and then they'll re-do the anime like they did FMAB and then canon Souji will be like MY FAMILY HAS RETURNED!!!

My favorite part about writing Souji?? Oh boy, it's that he's so flexible and complex. He's kind but he can be stern. He's loving but he can be cold. He's violent but he doesn't like to fight. He's bold but he's shy. He's slutty but also pure. He's a walking mass of contradictions which makes writing him in different situations so much fun. He's just... he's very real and human.

Oh boy... Ayato came from a long stint of me not feeling good about my writing, of people losing interest in me (all my head btw) and thinking "what can I do??" I wasn't feeling interested in writing but Souji wanted to be out and about, so I devised a scenario. What if he met someone connected to his mother?? It was only meant to be a friend, a connection he didn't have that would lead to more connections so he would get to know more about his family. As I started working with him, however, Souji and Ayato clearly were becoming attracted to each other, and this was before I even finalized my plans. Ayato was never really meant to be involved with Souji in the way he turned out, but you know what?? Sometimes the best things happen when you're being rebelled against lol. It was clear immediately that they were going to be together and so I was like "fuck it they're a thing now..." God, I remember the backlash from that LOL but I don't regret doing it. And since then I've got quite a few NPCs that I write from time to time. It was an attempt to remind myself that I wasn't writing for others, but for myself.

2. Favorite class/job?

gonna do this for the overall classes ! tank : dark knight. for the lore, aesthetic & story. also for the play style. I legit enjoy playing DRK & even consider just. tanking content from now on. DPS: reaper. it’s fast, fun & very flashy !! wish the class had been here earlier for more rpr quests tbh. healer: WHM. yesyes, cue the ‘haha brainless jobs, real gamers play the other healers’ sorry I like whm. I like my hands not hurting ( yes I am bitter about these jokes cause i don’t think ppl realize just how entitled they sound ... )

5. Favorite character(s)?

ysayle, venat, y’shtola, sadu, lyna, hythlodaeus & zenos .... also known as zenos going “let’s go lesbian’s let’s go” .

7. Least favorite character(s)?

because you never know if this kind of answer might not hurt someone, I elect to not answer it ♥

10. Favorite dungeon?

already answered but I will happily say sohr kai & amaurot again !

11. The trial/dungeon that you will never do again unless forced to do so?

neither trial nor dungeon but raid : the 3rd nier raid. just because my health can legit not stomach it, I ran it once & had to sleep for like 5 hours afterwards, it was absolutely awful & I am still really sad bcs I would love to farm some of that glam.

12. Favorite beast tribe?

pixies and moogles ! ...even if unlocking the damn fluffbats was hell, I enjoyed the overall story & some of the dailies were really cute ( like the one where you make toy ships for dragonets )

15. Favorite mount?

... the seretonin I get from how the magitek death claw holds the player character is unreal. also the shadow gwiber because it was the first time I did a current ex ,,, honorable mentions: lamb mount & the alkonost ...also middy. bcs middy.

20. Do you use glamours? What’s your favorite glamoured set if so?

does any RPer not use glams? I really love the wayfarer glam we got from tataru. also this set that was my msq set for endwalker. kinda wanna learn how to convert items so amaya can keep wearing it, despite being DRK in my replay of msq.

26. What’s the most number of recommendations you’ve received in a single instance?

... heck if I remember, probably smth like 4-5? 

FINAL FANTASY XIV questions // @salveticn .

Hello, very curious! Did your blog start as a canon yuri and overtime become this massive au or had it always been an au? If the former, why still say they are yuri? if they doesn’t go by the name yuri or have any resemblance to his canon? I would love to have the courage to do something like this but I also do not wholelly understand it? I apologize if asking this upset you at all!

Lore question?

LORE QUESTION

I LOVE LORE QUESTIONS!!!!!

*cough*

This is absolutely not upsetting at all! I don't get to talk about Koun's beginnings very often, so I'd love to explain a bit!

So consider this a lore dump for Koun's history as a character! Also this got very long so i'm sorry friend.

A little history on Kie and Vesperia

First thing to note, I've been a Yuri Lowell fan for years. And I really mean years. He's been an absolutely fascinating character for me, and I adore how layered he is even in his official canon. It's rare that you get a morally grey main character in a video game, and Yuri was my first introduction to that kind of character in media that wasn't portrayed as a throw-away character. The struggle of good and evil in video games (and media in general) is not a new concept....but at the time, the struggle of a morally grey MC was something I hadn't experienced before.

Good and evil aren't black and white. It's always grey, because it's always based on introspection, environments, and personal experiences. A society can see someone as a good person, but in reality that person is corrupt. Or a person can do something for the greater good but end up scorned by society due to their actions. It's all about perspective....and Vesperia in general handles this topic extremely well. Both in how it handles Yuri's actions, as well as how it handles government corruption and planetary crisis.

This really got me to love not just Yuri, but the game in general, as it was a very real story that...without the fantasy elements, could happen. It wasn't like Graces, in which Government corruption and planetary crisis was solved by friendship....but through war and death that Yuri had to do with his own hands most of the time.

But enough of my gushing over Vesperia and Yuri! I just wanted to explain why I chose Yuri of all characters.

RP History Before Koun

So we've established that I've been a Yuri fan for years. Lets talk about RP. I've been rping on tumblr in general for about....10 years. My first blog was a blog known as @novelisticartist which i had converted from a personal blog to a rp blog thanks to a couple of friends I'd made. My first ever rp post was made on May 14, 2014 (I just went and looked) and it was with a Yuri rper (AU Yuri). The character on that blog was originally a character I'd made up on the fly, an OC that grew along side the blog and the characters I interacted with.

I've been a writer for a lot longer than 10 years. I have massive stories in my head, hundreds of characters, etc....but until that moment, I'd never really set them out on the internet proper. I had rped a little on Deviantart, but nothing to the scale of tumblr. And I wouldn't be here today if not for that one AU Yuri lowell rper giving me the push I needed in order to try.

I used that blog for 2 years, before I moved over to a new blog. This blog was at that time a multimuse blog called musesofadenvale. Originally I worked with both blogs, but thanks to my ADHD I had a hard time focusing on both. Plus, interest had waned for my original character on novelisticartist. So eventually I moved over completely to the new blog.

Origin of Koun

For years, I had been playing a game called Aura Kingdom off and on. It's only been recently that I've completely quit playing, due to them moving servers and not giving enough warning to players to move their stuff over. I lost years worth of work due to this, and it completely turned me off the game. But I still have very fond memories of it, and it's existence has cemented a lot of lore for Koun in general.

Around September or October of 2015, I met some new friends on there. We'll call them M and A for privacy. They were avid rpers and we just....started rping together. I had styled my character in Yuri Lowell style, long black hair, used a sword, etc.....and we all just kind of ran with it.

This was what he looked like in game, and it was really fun to just kind of shove him in the situations that were in the game. I was doing my best to keep him as canon in personality as possible and We had a lot of interesting rps. one of which was where we were all demi-humans, and were trying to escape and it was just silly fun.

Unfortunately, me and A did not last as friends. She was a minor at the time and was not in a good household, and often times used me and M as venting stations. I was handling a lot, taking care of my mother at the time, who was recovering from a transplant, and we ended up growing apart after I put my foot down and requested that I not be vented too at the time.

But me and M continued to be friends for years. It was to her that I initially suggested the basic idea I had at the time for Koun. We were playing the game together and an idea hit my ADHD brain like lightning. She was aware of my love for Vesperia, and Yuri Lowell. I'd introduced her to the game and we had fun talking about it. And as we were playing, I just....had the thought of "what if Yuri Lowell was a god of luck?"

M absolutely lost it at the question, and started talking about how ironic it would be, hilarious even. Since in Vesperia, Yuri often talks about he's cursed with misfortune. The irony of him being a literal being of Luck was hilarious.

And yet...the idea stayed with me. Dug itself in my brain.

At the time, I was already rping on tumblr, and had already divided my attention between the two blogs. I was also playing Okami at the time too, and I have a weakness for japanese folklore in general. I played around with him on Aura Kingdom for a while, did a lot of research into some aspects of folklore, and fleshed out a lot of things on pen and paper (most of which were destroyed in an event at my old apartment which sucks but it is what it is.)

Finally, in January of 2016 I posed a question to my main blog Novelisticartist. I'd spent 2 years building up lore and fleshing out the character on that blog, and I had quite a few people who praised me on the sheer amount of work i'd put into her....so I posed the question of "would you all be willing to rp with an extremely AU version of Yuri Lowell?"

I wouldn't have even suggested it if the first person I'd interacted with had not been an AU Yuri themselves. Unfortunately, that blog is no longer on tumblr, and I hope wherever they are, that they're doing well.

Past Koun and Current Koun

When I first started rping Koun, I really focused hard on keeping what I believed to be the main elements that made Yuri...well Yuri present.

Sassy, Sarcastic, a being with a authority issue. A self-sacrificing idiot sometimes who travels around due to wanderlust.....willing to do something dark for the greater good. I worked hard to integrate similar lore into his AU as his canon...similar things happening. He has a Flynn, he has a Estelle (though their names are slightly different)

Everyone's interpretation of canon characters is different, after all. This was what I believed to be what the main elements that made Yuri up. Kind, but sarcastic. Blunt, but willing to help.

But he's had roughly 6ish...7 years (math not my strong suit) to develop. I'm quite aware that what I intended to do with him is not exactly what happened. he's evolved, changed as a person, with each interaction he's had over the years.

He is not the person he started as. But does he still count as an AU?

In some ways, yes. In others, no.

The basics of him are still the same. He's still sassy. He's still a self-sacrificing idiot. He definitely still has problems with authority figures. He has a thirst for adventure, he works easily with others despite whoever they are.

But there is a rather large divide now between Yuri Lowell, and Koun no Yuuri. Yuri rushes into danger, has a thirst for battle along side of adventure.....but Koun has become cautious. He has legitimate fears, he's cautious about who he interacts with, he has learned from mistakes and events.

The reason I still call Koun a "Yuri Lowell AU" is because I still see Yuri in him. Yuri was a core part of who he was for so long, it's not something I can just get rid of. I've debated with myself numerous times on whether or not to just call Koun an OC at this point....and I think he does qualify as one by now....but i talk myself out of it every time, because of what I see in the character.

As for the name thing, it's more....Koun's full name is Koun no Yuuri. This means "Luck of the Lily" very loosely. One of the things that I liked about Yuri was he gave nicknames to everyone...silly ones, but still nicknames. Koun is merely a shortened version of his own name, and he will often introduce himself (if he gives his full name) as either Koun or Yuri, giving the person the choice as to what to call him.

End Stuffs

I'd like to note, I'm dyslexic and neurodivergent, so explaining things isn't exactly my forte, so some of my reasoning may not make sense. It's hard to get the right words out to explain what's in my head.

In my years on tumblr, I've seen many things. Many different variants on how to rp different characters. I've seen sort of AUs, massive AUs, characters based off canon but not canon nor AU. Heck, the first person to get me rping on tumblr was a "Hipster" Yuri Lowell. The most important piece of advice I can give to a person...

Is do what you like.

Sure, there's lots of discourse over how things need to be "completely accurate to canon" if you wanna call yourself canon.....but I really honestly think that's bullshit. Because as I said earlier, Canon is subjective. Everyone will interpret differently. In the end, what everyone else thinks doesn't really matter, because you should write how you want to write.

Write what you want too. Write what makes you feel good. Find yourself some people who will write with you to have fun. Because that's important. It's important to have fun in what you do. What you write.

If you want to write a mostly canon character, do so. If you wanna write an OC, go for it. If you wanna write an AU canon character so AU that it passes an OC, jooin uuuuus. We welcome you with open arms.

I am always open to questions, or if you need advice! And I absolutely love lore questions! I'm sorry if this long ass reply was intimidating, but I love talking about Koun's backstory, his conception, and meta posts in general!

Can you explain more about your “do not reblog” rule? /gen

Do you not want reblogs of anything ever or just certain things? I try to check tags but tbh I’m still not really clear on the why so I do t know if I’m doing this right.

Hey, thanks for asking!

What it really boils down to is that it is incredibly hurtful when you've spent years looking to make contact in an RP community, and no one will reach out for RP, or show genuine interest in your OC... but complete strangers in the RP community will come by to take your OC aesthetic for their OC, and never interact otherwise, which is ultimately just using another person for your own gain.

If you like a character's aesthetic, and it's similar to your own OC's... why not go ahead and interact? (Send asks, or comment on posts or reblog writing or gposes with tags about how much you like the character, or whatever! ) Wouldn't that be a good first sign that your characters might get along, or have similar interests of some kind? It's a social hobby, after all, so you gotta talk to strangers eventually... so who better than someone whose OC blog intrigued you to begin with? If you like the aesthetic but not the OC... why not just follow the same resource blog they did, for more of the aesthetic you like?

An RP blog is essentially for helping to meet other RPers; it's like making a scrapbook about your character to show/advertise to others, to see if they might be interested in RP with your lil guy - "here's what they're like, are you interested?". But when people come by and only take from you, and don't engage in any other way, shape, or form? They don't reblog, or even hit the heart on your original works ( ie they literally just take aesthetic posts they could have gotten from the same resource blog that I did, so I get a notification, thinking it was someone actually interested in engaging in our shared, social hobby - but it's just someone who wants something from me) - or support you by maybe sharing your original work at all... well, it certainly makes *me* feel used, and it's both hurtful, and frustrating. It makes me feel like I'm just an object, and not a person behind a screen looking for contacts in a community that only seems to stop by when someone wants something; it makes me feel like people don't think about the person behind the screen.

That said, I explained it recently like the old "neighbor asking for a cup of sugar" thing - if I know you and we interact and I know you're not some stranger who only comes by to take from me what you will? Why wouldn't I be willing to share/ 'give you a cup of sugar'? There are definitely people I think are great on here, who support not only me, but so many others in the community, by sharing creative works and writing fun tags on them, etc. But if a complete stranger showed up at your home and didn't ask for a cup of sugar, but barged right in and started helping themselves to everything in your fridge... wouldn't you be upset in some manner? They didn't say hi, didn't introduce themselves... they didn't say anything at all, and you have no idea who this person is! You'd probably lock your door, and not open it to strangers anymore - plus, it's not like you wouldn't make them a sandwich if they were a friend in need, but it's off-putting to be used... and doubly so when you don't even know who this person is.

I've lost a lot of my desire to try and be active, myself, because no one seems to reach out for RP anymore (all my longterm RP friends from years ago have quit RP over the last few years because of this - they were always the ones putting in all the effort with reaching out to new contacts - among a handful of other reasons), and as a fellow anxious person... you just gotta bite the bullet and be social at times if you want RP, you can't hide behind social anxiety in a social hobby (don't I know it). You can't just hope it falls in your lap. But between being regularly ghosted by people (who seem to only want ERP, and disappear when it doesn't happen) - and Tumblr mostly just being a hurtful experience... I've largely gone inactive, and try to share others' stuff when I do log on.

Tl;dr If the only thing people want is aesthetic posts... why not just follow the same resource blogs - why use the blog of someone trying to make connections? If they want to RP, or establish some sort of connection by mutually sharing each other's creative works, and sending asks and doing tag games, etc. - (ie if they want to establish a rapport) then that's amazing! Full steam ahead.

But it hurts, and ultimately makes me feel pretty worthless when I love a character I've worked hard on and tried for years to establish, and then most notifications are just another name of a stranger who only comes by to take aesthetic posts they could have gotten anywhere else.

Sorry for being long-winded - the ADHD contributes to that, but I've also had some people be incredibly entitled and cruel when I was blocking them, and pointed out to them that the only notifications I had from them for many months was them simply taking aesthetic posts, and never interacting otherwise... as if they felt entitled to pump my blog for their own OC's aesthetic (or its someone who follows me and just instantly starts combing my blog for their OC's aesthetic... conveniently skipping anything that's actually original work I spent time creating) - so I tend to overexplain, these days, so it's clear that it comes from a place of hurt, and trying to protect myself and cultivate a healthier circle of people around me... its not out of malice, or grudges, etc.

Write your RPer Resolutions for 2024! (What are some goals for yourself as a writer? Improve descriptions? Plot with more members? Etc.)

Plot with more people! I get really awkward about this, and sometimes when I’m more stressed out or bone deep wiped from working with kids I don’t follow through on things I definitely want to follow through on. So this year I am determined to plot with more people and make more connections for the muses. Because everyone is doing such cool things with their writing and I want to connect with them.

Descriptions - I am still not the best at these. I need to practice a bit more on actually describing places around my characters and some details to enrich a thread. I want to make my posts a little deeper. Maybe I gotta do what I did in the past and look at some more examples of descriptions and get inspired that way. I just want to improve as a writer and I think I’ve slacked a lot and gotten a bit lazier.

Self Paras - I want to get in the depths of my characters and their backgrounds this year. I wrote two sort of one shots for Tad - his uncle’s perspective and then his thing with his parents. I want to do more stuff like that and make my muses characterizations deeper.

A Big Plot - I did one once with Arthur and it felt really satisfying to tell a story that involved a bunch of people and created a fun direction for the rp to go into. I would love for a chance to do one again, though idk how or when I will do something like it again.

Write at least one resolution, or “goal,” that you have as an RPer for your character(s)

Tad - My goal for Tad is to have him realize what his major will be. I’ve finally figured out what direction I want to go there, so now it’s all about getting him to the point where he actually can choose that major and go forward with his studies. I want to get him excited about that and the direction his life can take him.

Shang - I want to have him fall in love with the town more and really get attached. I want him to have a nice romance. He’s the kind of guy who will really try to be a gentleman and pull out chairs and all that. I want that for him. But I also want his biwakening to happen this year. I’m not sure how to go about it yet but I do have that in my mind as things I want to happen.

Tink - This is the year of chaotic mess. I am having Tink mess around and meet with anyone who gives her attention and I don’t care how wild it gets. I want her to really dive deep in the regretful behavior. I also do have a goal to get her involved with the Hollow more. I just haven’t figured out how to approach it yet or have her approach the other fairies.

Finn - My goal is to involve him in college social groups. I’m already starting the process to get him involved there, but I just want to be sure I follow through! I am determined to get him to experience a lot of the college things.

Write at least one resolution IN CHARACTER for your characters. What do THEY want to accomplish or change in the New Year?

Tad - Tad wants to patch things up with Hiro and Pip. He also wants to figure out what he wants to do with his life. He feels restless and he wants to work out how to change that. He wants to figure out what his dream is.

Shang - Shang wants to find out what truly happened to his father. He also wants to work out the issues with the company. Figure out what the next steps will be if his father doesn’t reappear.

Tink - Tink wants to be successful! She wants to do something great that she can brag about in the Hollow!

Finn - His resolution is to reconnect with his friends and to try to grow even more as a person.

List one or more characters you have never interacted with that you would like to do so

Lightning - I don’t have any sort of plot idea or anything, but I love Lightning and the energy he gives off and I’d love an opportunity to have one of mine interact with mine. Somehow in some way.

Clarion - She is the Queen, and I am definitely curious about the dynamic that she and Tink would have. I just imagine some friction since Tink is the way she is, but idk. I’d definitely like to know.

The Madrigals - truly any of them. I don’t think I’ve had much of a chance to interact with any of them other than Isabela. But I’d love for that to change. Idk with who or how but I’d like that.

Milo - I want to bother him with Tad. Truly I do. I also just want to write with him! With Tad or anyone else. Gimme a chance at writing with Milo man.

Angel - another case of a character I like that I don’t really have any ideas for plotting…just yet.

Talk a bit about your plotting style – what plots are you most drawn to? Do you prefer to come with a fully-formed idea and plot off that, or throw stuff at the wall and see what sticks?

It honestly kind of depends. Sometimes I have a solid idea or a direction and I hit up the person that I think could help me go in that direction. A lot more times I throw stuff at the wall and see what sticks. It really depends on the muse. With Shang it’s more directed. I know he needs to figure stuff out with his dad so it has a general direction I know where to go.

With Tad it’s much more flexible and open. I’m sort of happy to go with the flow of things that come up. Or I’m also more willing to toss out a wild direction like for New Years. Tink similarly right now is me tossing out some fun things.

I’m really drawn to I guess characters with a lot of self-doubt. Or things that they’re really stuck on thinking they’re not good at. With Tad he thinks he’s dumb, Tink thinks she’s a total failure, Finn thinks he’s too socially awkward. Shang might be the only one who really knows himself (or thinks he does anyway).

Family dynamics! I haven’t been able to really dive into a plot like that but I’m planning for that in this coming year once I figure a few things out. I love the tension and bond of siblings, loved it a lot with the Mallards when I wrote Louie and want to do it again with another family group.

Talk a bit about character relationships – what relationships are you most drawn to? How do you prefer to approach shipping (if at all!)? What, specifically, are you looking for right now for your character relationships?

I really love found family stories. Maybe it’s because my own family has had a lot of issues with each other and toxicity (that we’re now healing from yay), but I’ve always been drawn into that. Tad and Finn especially let me explore that with their close friendships, and with the messiness of their actual families. I love the deep bonds friends can have.

I also really love romance in stories. It doesn’t have to be an otp situation. It can be a messy fling, it can be a one time chaotic affair. I just like exploring things that do go into feelings and romance in some type of way. I love faking dating plots, I love marriages that start fast and end fast and messy. I love the drama of those connections that are imperfect.

I am open to all ships and all possibilities for my characters. I don’t feel the need to rush it or anything, but I am willing to plan things out if characters have that spark of chemistry. You know? I’m happy to be open to any potential of a ship. I do get a little nervous about reaching out to someone if I feel there is a vibe, but I want to try to do it. But if anyone feels that energy with one of mine, please lmk because it’s always possible I’m feeling it too and am kinda like ahhh how to say this. But yeah I’m also open to different types of ships so if people want to go a direction for a short while too I’m all for that.

Plotting Exercise! Pick one of the resolutions/goals in #3 and plan a rough guideline to how you could accomplish it.

Tad figuring out his major!

TAD is convinced to go to a career day by PHINEAS.

TAD gets overwhelmed by all the options and ditches halfway through to hang out with Hiro.

HIRO goes through something and Tad tries to comfort him.

TAD has a brain blast and chooses [redacted].

♒ Thoughts on the fandom you're currently rping in?

I came from being fandomless and just in the indie rp tag, and I really do feel more at home here than I did there. There was always something wrong with how everyone had their blogs, it was never enough for some people when the "elite majority" where who made the rules. ( elite majority being gifmakers who provided the resources, who set down sometimes the most nutty rules about how and when someone could use their gifs. )

I know that every fandom has their problems, but I've personally been very lucky, I think? I haven't met anyone problematic and most of everyone here has been so nice and welcoming to me when I'm so awkward and nervous because of how badly I had it in indie rp. I consistently was having to look over my shoulder because there were people who had used my kindess to others and were incredibly abusive toward me and other people, simply on the fact I had been kind to them and when they wanted me to do something problematic, I said no.

The indie rp fandomless group is gross. The only way you could get any attention is having the same 4 faceclaims and then only writing smut, and if you didn't have a "Diverse" group you were just fetishizing, even if you had all diverse faceclaims because it was "clearly a YOU problem" if your diverse faceclaims didn't get attention over the 4 most popular ones in the tag.

The fandomless rpers need serious help because I don't think any of them have touched grass in a minute. I love being here compared to there and i've told my friends I don't think I'm going back to indie rp for a long time unless it gets an extreme overhaul.