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#i love jay halstead
lily-174 · 1 month
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Saw you in the Jay Halstead x Reader tag! I was hoping you could do one where Jay is dating a black belt, and he keeps forgetting she can take care of herself bc she's been training for many years. Maybe she gets kidnapped, but escapes on her own? Thank you if you do! No problem if you don't! Have a good day 😊 💛
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you picked the wrong girl- Jay halstead x reader
AN: well, I’m back… sorry I’ve been gone for so long guys. But I hope you enjoy this, and If you’ve read fics from me before. I hope you like the change in writing style.. I’d love to hear what you think (I did write the at 1am tho and didn’t proofread)
trigger warnings: Angst, Assault, kidnapping, mention of endo
**
“yeah jay i’ll come over when i finish my shift tomorrow” you held your phone up to your ear, bag on the opposite shoulder as you left your apartment building.
“alright babe. be safe okay?” Jay, your boyfriend of 3 years spoke through the phone. A smile on your face as you thought of seeing him after your shift at firehouse 51.
“you too” you smiled before ending the call, shoving your phone into your back pocket as you began walking to your car. You and jay had met while serving in afghanistan yet had reconnected almost 6 years later after you started working back in chicago and got a job at firehouse 51 through your friend clark and everyone at 51 has quickly become your family.
As you approached your car you scrolled through your phone looking to message your best friend Gabriella Dawson to let her know you’re on your way to work. The two of you usually spend the start of your shift gossiping, it’s something you’ve grown to love. Especially when it comes to girl talks in a firehouse full of men. God just the memories of the boys faces—specifically cruz— when they walk in on a conversation about something they don’t want to know makes you laugh. Like the time you had cruz walk in on you talking to gabby about the horrendous side affects of your condition Endometriosis. Which you only got diagnosed with two years ago, and luckily it wasn’t completely debilitating for you as it was for a lot of women.
When you’d been diagnosed you were terrified of telling anyone, even Jay. But after hundreds of conversations with Gabby and Jay—who were both unapologetically supportive—it no longer bothered you and you’d come to the conclusion you’d rather talk about it and educate people on the subject rather than hide from it.
Shooting Gabby a quick text that read: ‘On way now. Got so much to tell you about the CPD party’
You smiled to yourself watching the three dots pop up signifying gabby was messaging you back. You and Gabby had almost no shame when it came to your conversations, so much so that you were sure you knew more about Gabby and Casey’s sex life than Casey did himself, and vice versa for Gabby and Jay. You knew Gabby had something to tell you too as she’d insinuated as such on the phone last night. And boy, did you have something to tell her too. The sex you’d had with Jay after that CPD party had been extraordinary, easily in your top 5 sexual experience—all of which had been with Jay. He was amazing, and with the strain and pain endometriosis puts on a woman’s sex life Jay had been so understanding and patient. He’d made sex something unimaginable.
‘Can’t wait. I have news too. 🫢’ Gabby replied. You smile as you reach your car pocketing your phone and pulling out your car keys. Just as you go to press the button on your keys to unlock your car what feels like a violent slam of bricks hits your head. Pain slices through your body, shaking your bones, starting from your skull and travelling all the way down to your toes. the pain is sharp, cold. So cold that black dots dance across your vision. You can’t process anything, every thought, every instinct you have fails under the pulsing pain in your skull as everything turns black.
Pain shatters the darkness enveloping you, cold air hitting the wetness coating your hair sending a shiver down your spine. Fear claws at you, digging into your flesh, pulling and tugging at your stomach acid just as the hands are. The hands? Pain and panic interlock as everything clicks. Hands. Gripping your waist dragging you across a stony path. Darkness, not the same as before, not the dark pain that had taken you hostage but the sun leaving you, leaving you vulnerable with your captor.
It takes a moment for your eyes to adjust to the darkness. Yet, when they do adrenaline takes ahold of you. Forcing the old you, the soldier to take over. Power floods your veins as soon as your eyes meet the evil ones of your kidnapper.
Where’s jay? Does anyone even know you’re gone? How long have you been gone?
Questions you won’t let linger stab you. And your limbs fill with strength, adrenaline. You pull your elbow back before forcing it into your captors ribs with every ounce of strength you can, ignoring the pain, ignoring everything. You refuse to be a photo on Intelligence’s evidence board.
Your captor grunts, weakening his grip on your as he stumbles unprepared. He quickly recovers, lunging forward aiming to take you down with his fists. You don’t let him. Your lungs clench, heart pounding as if a stampede lives beneath your ribs as everything you’ve been taught everything you’ve learnt and everything that’s ever made you feel powerful rushes through your veins. Army training, Boxing, karate, kickboxing.
You dodge his attempted assault and quickly throw a balled fist toward his jaw, and it connects with enough force to break a knuckle. You move quickly, precise like you’ve got forever to calculate his next move. But you don’t. It’s the adrenaline, rushes through your veins giving you enough energy for the final push. With another firm punch he stumbles, and in the next moment you land a hard kick to his most precious area. He falls, losing his balance and stumbling with a pained groan.
Run. You barely process your next movements as your legs carry you, each step shakier than the last as you take your chance, sprinting away. Your lungs burn, your skin igniting against the harsh chicago wind. You don’t even know where you are but you keep running, running, hoping to find something familiar. Some landmark, somewhere you know, someone you know.
Your body weakens, you feel as if you’re your legs will fail at any moment as you push on. The wind brushing against your tear stained cheeks leaving a chill in its wake.
95th and Trent. The familiar street sends the final wave of adrenaline through your body. You don’t stop running, you can’t. Not until your safe. You don’t know how long you’ve been running for, how long you’ve been missing. But when you reach the familiar 21st district it almost feels as if your heart stopped. Racing up the front steps you barrel through the door. Panicked, irrational, exhausted.
Trudy Platts panicked eyes meet yours and a wave of comfort makes your eyes well up. She rushes out from behind her desk ordering a officer away, “Get Halstead. And call a damn Ambulance and 51. Tell em we’ve got her.” She bites out before rushing towards you and taking you into her arms.
As soon as the warmth that is trudy Platt touches you, your heart cracks. Almost loud enough your worried it could’ve been heard from miles away. Tears poor from your eyes and you clutch onto her uniform as the adrenaline dissipates.
“Baby” A distraught familiar voice takes you by the hands guiding you home. His arms, his smell. You’re home, you’re safe. Jay takes you in his arms, tightly. Letting all of his worry and anger seep from him in the form of your touch.
“Are you okay? Y/n, I was trying to find you. I was gonna find you baby.” He whispers as your claw at his muscular frame. “You’re safe, I’ve got you” he whispers, his voice only causing the crack in your chest to grow. A crack that only he can fix, now that you’re home.
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xofeno · 8 months
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Hey, do you have a couch guy?
CHICAGO P.D. 3.05, "Climbing Into Bed" (2015)
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"I love you, more than I ever thought possible."
"I love you. I've known for years that I want it to be you and me always"
Chicago PD - 9x01
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manhandlememando · 6 months
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he’s so goddamn pretty it’s not okay
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I watched Undrafted last night (totally justifiable research for the Grudge Match chapter) and man, I forgot how much I love that movie. It's ridiculous. Like...
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Exactly the kind of energy I was looking for as I worked on that chapter. 😂😂😂
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laurambrose · 10 months
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#i'm fine. #once we catch this son of a bitch i'll be JUST fine Chicago PD | 9x13 - STILL WATER
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aromanticbuck · 2 months
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Moustead + Animal Control AU
Jay didn't know how to do anything but follow.
After coming home again, he was the one floundering. With the divorce finalized and his brother halfway across the country, he had no choice but to follow along on the heels of his best friend. Mouse managed to get a job, one that paid enough to pay for an apartment. The space wasn't exactly meant for two people, with one bedroom, a small bathroom, and a kitchen that was barely big enough for one body at a time, but it was enough, temporarily.
It didn't have to be forever. It was just until he got back on his feet again, since he couldn't exactly go back to working in Intelligence, and whatever odd job he picked up didn't pay enough to live off of. He still had his truck, but delivering food around Chicago for less than minimum wage was far from ideal.
Then, he got lucky.
"You know, my truck partner got promoted. I can put in a good word, if you want to apply while we have openings." "As great as that sounds, I don't want to work for Animal Control." "Why not? You might even get to hang out with me all day. That would be fun." "Mouse, with all due respect, I already live on your couch. I don't think we could handle spending that much more time together." "Just apply. If you don't want the job, you can say no."
He felt stupid, filling out the same government form he was used to filling out just for a job that boiled down to cats in trees and stray dogs in alleys. It was ridiculous to think that he could have been next in line to lead the Intelligence Unit, with his wife at his side, and he didn't have any of it because he'd thrown it all away in the middle of an identity crisis. Surely stooping so low as to ride around in a white van all day couldn't really be better than what he was afraid of turning into before.
But Jay applied, and the job was offered to him, and, if he was being honest with himself, it wasn't that different from the army. He was in a truck all day, next to his best friend, and it was fun. They got to choose the music, and when they took a break, and where they got lunch. It even made carpooling easier. And, with two incomes, it didn't take more than a couple months to save up for an apartment that could actually accommodate both of them.
He just hadn't accounted for how much of the job had nothing to do with stay dogs and stuck cats.
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lady-rhaesnow · 3 months
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I have come to the heartbreaking conclusion that I will not be watching the latest season of Chicago PD.
Honestly the last season nearly destroyed me and I don’t think I have it in me to watch Gwen ruin what was once my safety ship. Hailey and Jay deserve so much better and I will not be relying on the ridiculous writing that is happening in the writers room for any sense of closure because as we can clearly see that is just not going to happen.
I would like to believe that Hailey and Jay got married and are very much happy together thank you very much. Because that is what they deserve.
I refuse to be disrespected by this atrocious storyline for them. We know this is not how things would have worked out had there been some real writing happening.
I will gladly stick to the fanfics written by the very talented people in our fandom who know how to deliver on an ending.
I wish I could stay I would stay just to watch Tracy but honestly I did that with the previous season and it didn’t do me any favours. I won’t be doing that again.
Sorry, but I’m out.
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mrs-jamesbbarnes · 19 days
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The amount of Chenford fans who have also been hurt by Upstead is both comforting and horrifying.
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weird-kid-maxx · 5 months
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*The group is getting into the car* Jay: I’m driving. Adam, out of view: Shotgun! Kim, turning to face Adam: Aww! But you had it on the way here- Everyone except Adam: WOAH- Adam, holding a shotgun: No! I found a shotgun! And I want the front seat! *Pumps gun*
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uncasualfangirl · 2 years
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The only reason I'm ok with last nights episode. This fucking dorks smile
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lily-174 · 1 year
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can i request a jay halstead with prompts 3, 5 & 10? very insecure reader going through some mental health troubles 🥺 i need comfort 😂
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we all have bad days, even bad weeks. - jay halstead x reader
overview: jay had noticed the difference in your behaviour at work when he shows up to your apartment you finally open up to someone about your mental health.
requested: ‘hold me please’ ‘don’t you see i’m trying’ and ‘i’m afraid i’m not good enough for you’
trigger warning: anxiety, depression, mentions of alcohol and bad self image.
a/n- i hope you enjoy and this fic brings you some comfort, if anyone’s having a bad day and needs someone to talk to i’m here <3
this is a bit of a short one, i really don’t know if i like this. please let me know what you think anyway i hope you enjoy <3
i just realised i should’ve made the reader a little more insecure, i’m sorry this isn’t my best fic. if you have any other requests please let me know :)
chicago pd masterlist
**
depression and anxiety. they weren’t new to you. you’d struggled before even in your teen years. but after joining the police department you found ways to deal with it and it rarely ever bothered you. of course you still had bad days, but you could manage it.
but that one bad day, had turned into a bad week. so much so the days were blurring together, a feeling you were all too used to. you’d tried to distract yourself write in your journal but this time it was just a little more difficult to rise above.
you’d tried spending time with your new boyfriend jay, he was a blessing. you’d only recently made it official after seeing each other for a few months and keeping it a secret from everyone in intelligence. but you were so socially drained you couldn’t even bring yourself to spend time with jay after work.
jay noticed the change in your behaviour first at work, nothing drastic just you staring into space consumed by your own thoughts, then the bags forming under your eyes which was paired with you drinking almost double the amount of coffee you normally would. then he’d noticed the way you would try to stay away from big groups of people.
he’d already asked you multiple times if you were okay only for you to brush off his concern which only made his worries grow. he asked before you both left work if you wanted to stay at his and he’d make dinner in an attempt to make you feel better but you declined his offer feeling like sitting on your couch alone with a glass of wine and your favourite tv show playing would be a better idea.
so that’s exactly what you did. sat on the couch your hair tied up dressed in jays hoodie and a pair of shorts with a blanket wrapped around you and a glass of wine in your hand as you stared at the tv. you couldn’t pinpoint what had triggered you to feel like this, the crippling anxiety, the dislike you had for yourself as a teenager rushing back, and the amount of doubts you had about yourself and your relationship. you tried thinking back to if it was a case that could’ve triggered it but you couldn’t put a finger on it.
consumed by your own thoughts you sat sipping from the glass of wine, did jay really love you? where you good enough to be in intelligence? the only thing that brought you back to reality was the loud knocking on your door. sighing as you placed your glass on the coffee table you got up from your comfortable position on the couch and walked to the door, your slipper clad feet slowly walking you over to the door.
opening the door you were shocked to see who was stood on the other side. jay. there he stood with a six pack of beer and a plastic bag full of snacks with that cheeky smirk on his face. he could instantly tell you weren’t feeling yourself just from the look of pure exhaustion on your face.
“what are you doing here?” you asked a part of you kinda upset he’d invaded your alone time but another part of you telling yourself he could distract you from your thoughts.
“i came to find out what’s wrong and not let you just sit alone and be all tired and sad.” he spoke making his way into your apartment, you watched as he turned on the lamp making the darkness disappear and he put the bag and the six pack on the coffee table next to your glass of wine.
“i’m not sad” he turned to look at you with a look on his face as if to say i know you’re lying. he wasn’t stupid, he could tell when something was wrong especially when it came down to someone he cared about.
“if you’re gonna lie put some effort into it, for me” he smiled his cheery voice making a slight smile show up on your face as you walked back over to the couch. you knew jay wouldn’t leave until you gave up some reason as to why you were acting differently.
“jay seriously i’m good” you huffed returning to your warm blanket curled up on the couch. he shook his head and sat next to you one of his arms going around your shoulders so he could pull you into his chest. as soon as he did you felt that familiar feeling of security and safety that jays arms always provided. he was your safety blanket.
“y/n i know you’re not. you can’t keep avoiding everyone and drinking 5 cups of coffee every morning. you can’t let yourself give up” jay wasn’t stupid, that bad day had turned into a bad week and a part of you was starting to believe you wouldn’t be able to get yourself out of the hole you were digging.
“can’t you see i’m trying? i don’t want to feel like this jay” he gently pulled away from you so he could look into your eyes, his face laced with a look of empathy and concern as his beautiful eyes looked over your face admiring you. his freckled face you loved so much inches away from your face you could almost feel his breath.
“feel like what baby? you gotta talk to me that way i can help you” the soft tone of his voice warmed your heart, butterflies fluttering in your stomach as you looked up at him. you didn’t understand how you got so lucky to have a man as perfect as jay halstead. he was perfect in every way.
you contemplated telling him, you didn’t want him to think of you any differently. you knew he’d understand having he’d opened up to you a little bit about his ptsd. but your brain liked to play tricks on you and trick you into thinking he wouldn’t care because his problems were worse. that’s the thing about mental illness, it’s competitive. but the look in his eyes made you feel so safe and loved, maybe you could tell him without the fear of being judged. so that’s what you did. you told him.
“i just, i don’t know what it is. i feel stupid.. i just this week everything i used to struggle with it’s all just come back. i know how to deal with it, i really do it’s just these feelings are so strong this time” you explained in a way that didn’t let up too many details, you watched his face as he listened intently to you words. he seemed to really care about what you were saying, the eye contact remained strong as you spoke proving the fact he was listening to your every word. as he listened he was mentally coming up with strategies and ways to attempt to help you.
“what are you feeling? i can try and help” he offered as he looked down at you one of his hands reaching for yours as he interlaced your fingers with his, the pad of his thumb gently rubbing against your hand in a way that just made you feel cared for. he had that effect on you. he could make you feel safe and cared for in minutes.
“my anxiety jay, i can’t sleep, i feel this constant pit in my stomach. i have doubts about everything and i was learning to love myself, my body everything just sometimes it’s harder to accept what i look like and i just look at myself and pick at things no one else would notice” jay listened nodding as you spoke, taking in every word, you hadn’t ever felt so listened to in your life. jays heart stung thinking about the fact you’d be struggling and as your boyfriend it’s taken him a week to intervene, he felt as if he should’ve said something sooner.
“i’ll stay here tonight, you can have a shower i’ll cook and i’ll do what i can to help you get some sleep. i know what i say isn’t going to change the way you look at yourself or the way that you feel, but y/n you’re breathtaking. i love everything about you.” jay whispered softly rubbing the back of your hand with the pad of his thumb in an attempt to comfort you. his words almost brung tears to your eyes, he was perfect. there wasn’t one thing you would change about jay. he was everything you ever needed.
“can you tell me what you have doubts about?” he was so careful with his words, it confused you how he was so emotionally intelligent. most guys didn’t care for anyone but themselves but jay. he was the most selfless man you’d ever met.
“us, work anything i’m just afraid, i’m afraid i’m not good enough for you” you answered his question and he pressed a kiss to your forehead before pulling you back into his chest and hugging you gently rubbing your back as he did. those words made him sigh, he loved you. and he felt as if you were too good for him, like he wasn’t good enough for you, he loved everything about you, from your looks to the way you made him feel.
“you have nothing to worry about with me y/n, you’re more then good enough for me. i love you. a lot” that was the first time he’s said those three words and it sent a shiver down your spine, you looked up at him in disbelief and he pressed a kiss to your lips which you gratefully returned, the kiss full of love and admiration.
“i love you too” he smiled at your words bringing you into his chest again, the conversation making tears brim to your eyes, that had been the first time since high school you spoke to anyone about your anxiety and the fact jay was so understanding made tears fall down your cheeks as you felt the relief of finally getting everything off your chest.
he noticed you crying and laid down on the couch pulling you gently down on top of him, he rubbed your back as you softly cried into his chest as he whispered sweet words into your ear, words that made your heart flutter, he wanted to help he wanted to make you feel okay.
“is there anything else i can do?” he asked softly his free hand interlacing your fingers with his, while his other hand rubbed your back as tears fell from your eyes that you’d so desperately tried to hold back but you couldn’t help them falling.
“just hold me please” that’s all you had to say and jay would stay there and hold you all night. he would do anything to make you feel better. and you knew he would, he pressed a kiss to your head as he held you against him whispering sweet words into your ear.
you’d lost track of how long you’d been laid there on top of him, staining his shirt with your tears but he didn’t care, when you finally stopped crying your eyes felt heavy, you focused on jays breathing and the beating of his heart as you felt his hand still gently rubbing your back before your eyes closed giving into sleep. when jay noticed you’d finally fallen asleep a small smile raised on his lips as he hoped you would finally get a good nights sleep. he didn’t stop rubbing your back he stayed doing the same and he wouldn’t dare move in fear of waking you up. he loved you and wanted the best for you.
he spent the next hour planning ideas in his head for what he could do to make you feel better, anything that he could do to reassure you to make you feel loved and appreciated. he planned out a few ideas knowing you’d scold him in the morning when he presents his ideas to you but he didn’t care. a few dates to bring your spirits up sounds good to him, and gave him an excuse to spoil you.
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xofeno · 7 months
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CHICAGO P.D. 6.15, "Good Men" (2019)
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Upstead wedding - giggly trasse version
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solesommerso · 6 months
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blacklit paradise au! — aftermath —
“You’re smoking?” Jay startles at Sarah’s voice, quickly taking the cigarette out of his mouth, about to crush it out in the glass ashtray sitting on the small table he keeps on the balcony of his apartment but Sarah shakes her head to stop him.
“Don’t tell Voight.” She lets out a small puff of air, Jay thinks it’s an attempt at a laugh.
“Calm down I won’t tell your boss you’re smoking, your brother on the other hand…” Reese trails off and grins when Jay glares at her.
“Don’t you dare.” He points his two fingers holding the cigarette at her with a serious tone, though the smile on his lips cuts through it all. He’s just happy Sarah’s outside, and smiling.
“Your secrets safe with me.” The plastic chair Sarah pulls to sit in front of Jay makes a scraping noise against the concrete. It sounds oddly like the scrape of the dresser in front of the door the night Jay had to— he shakes the thought away, taking a drag of his cigarette and holding it a little longer than normal.
“Natalie went back to work today, I’m officially the last one left.” Sarah tries to sound nonchalant but Jay can see the hurt written across her face as she plucks Jay’s half drunk soda from the table, looking anywhere but at Halstead.
“You’re allowed to take your time, your stitches haven’t even healed.” He assures and leans his elbows onto his knees, a way to be closer to Sarah, as if some threat is going to pop out of nowhere and he’ll need to jump up to save her. God he feels like he did when he got home from Afghanistan, which is a scary thought he chooses to ignore.
“I know, that’s all anyone’s been telling me. I just- I’m staying in your apartment, waking up either panicking so bad I throw up or start sobbing, I can’t even look at my own clothes so I’ve been wearing yours and- I just feel so fucking broken.” Her chest heaves as she sighs, sipping at the coke in her hands, leg bouncing against the chair under her.
“Hey I haven’t gone back to work either, and I catch myself counting your breaths when you’re sleeping on the couch, and I triple check the doors locked after I come home, and I could keep going. The point is, we’re both going through a lot and that’s okay, we’re gonna be okay.” Their eyes meet and Sarah nods faintly before bringing her drink to her lips again.
“But stop stealing my drinks.”
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spiritcold5 · 1 year
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