#i love it every time i open this too
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Creatures bred in some laboratory
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Omega and Crosshair with a little Jurassic Park inspiration
#the bad batch#tbb omega#tbb crosshair#tbb#the bad batch spoilers#omega#crosshair#my art#had this idea for awhile and was intimidated to execute it but I'm happy with it#Crosshair looks different every time I draw him but I think the likeness is starting to settle#anyway I love JP and the JP vibes of the s3 opener were so good#and yeah i did the reflective eyes again it's just too fun
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izuku didn’t just have to see katsuki’s dead body, he also had to see the fucking all might card right next to him. physical proof that katsuki always had a tender spot in his heart for izuku and their childhood together. evidence that katsuki fucking LOVED HIM THIS WHOLE TIME and now it’s TOO LATE. it’s actually so devastatingly romantic and fucking tragic. izuku really only finds out katsuki loved him all along when he thinks he’s lost him forever.
#bakudeku#bkdk#and then kacchan comes back and izuku stares at him with such open longing like#who can blame him he knows now#how can he not know!!!!#what else can it mean to hang on to a little card you got together years ago#and it’s right by his face too??#he was probably looking at it as he died???#it makes me fucking insane every time I think about Katsuki’s sentimental ass hanging onto that stupid card#carrying it around with him#his biggest regret not getting it signed#no matter what he never could bring himself to let it go#just has it on him at any given time apparently#like have you heard the phrase carrying a torch for someone#bc that’s#the metaphor is right there.#AND IZUKU HAS TO SEE IT HE HAS TO LOOK AT IT#WHEN HE THINKS ITS TOO LATE#HE LOVED ME THE WHOLE TIME AND ITS TOO LATE#ITS PEAK ROMANCE ITS SO BEAUTIFUL#I’M SO GLAD ITS NOT TOO LATE#in my mind bkdk is already canon bc this is just so damning#he only calms down when he’s told maybe it isn’t too late after all too#it’s so romance it’s to tragic it’s so dramatic it’s so JUICY ITS SO GOOD#I COULD TALK ABOUT IT FOREVER AND JUST MIGHT
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Thinking about that mural from DE
You know which one
TRUE LOVE IS POSSIBLE ONLY IN THE NEXT WORLD, FOR THE NEW PEOPLE. IT IS TOO LATE FOR US. WREAK HAVOC ON THE MIDDLE CLASS
The next world mural. In the game, you encounter this piece very early on if you interact with everything available, you probably see this mural before you've ever even heard of Dora or before you've started to get really serious about your commie tendencies, if that's how you choose to play. And the reaction is like, "wow, this is kinda profound actually". Or maybe it's like, "oh lol, this game really is commie af isn't it" (even though later on it turns out that the game is much more critical of communism than you'd think at first). And the story in the ledger provides some insight into Harry and Jean and how they work together too, so it feels like it makes sense, it fits in very well at that moment in the game and that's it.
But looking back at this mural after you've played through the entire game, knowing what you know of Harry's relationship with Dora...
It's Harry's own fucking love story in a way, isn't it?
Him and Dora came from very different backgrounds. He's genuinely poor, grew up checking the trash cans on the streets for tare and edible food, spent his teenage years running around with a bunch of kids who all OD'd or got themselves killed one way or another over the years. He had dreams of getting an education, getting a chance to use his creativity and curiosity and learn about all that that is worth exploring in this world (which is everything), but those dreams are long dead. She's solidly middle class, with access to all the education and art and music he's always dreamt of, with her family to always fall back on. She's everything Harry's ever dreamt of growing up. She might as well be living in another world.
They fall in love with each other and she moves to Jamrock to live with him. Jamrock, the biggest fucking ghetto in Revachol, full of tweakers and gangsters and just thousands upon thousands of poor people permanently down on their luck trying to get by, with no proper aid or government and a police station so understaffed and underfunded they never even stood a chance. And they can barely make ends meet even living in Jamrock, moving from shithole to shithole, never knowing when they'll have their electricity cut, when something will happen that gets them thrown out, desperately scrambling for a new place to stay. And Dora could never do that, not really - she never actually lived in Jamrock, she always had the possibility of leaving, of going to work across the river and visiting her parents whenever she felt like it or just escaping, packing her shit and getting on the tram and never going back. And as long as she knew she wasn't really, truly stuck in this miserable shithole forever, she wasn't ever really living in Jamrock. And it could never be enough for her.
And she wanted more - for herself, for Harry, for their family, who even knows. Maybe she saw Harry struggling trying and failing to make a difference as a gym teacher and thought he could do more good with the RCM. Maybe she was getting desperate, living in this fucking shithole, and thought they needed more money. Maybe it was something completely else - but what is certain is that Harry ended up joining the RCM, and the 41st, and everyone there is on speed, everyone is miserable and desperate and always running behind playing catch up with the case load, with the crimes, with the drug addicts and rapists and murderers, and Harry, who's always been like this close to a genuine mental breakdown, just fucking falls apart. He needs to help people, needs to make a difference, and working at the 41st, with the budget and case load and staffing situation and the pure fucking misery in the area. He goes out and meets a miserable person after a miserable person and he can't do anything else than be nice, make their day a little bit more manageable, do his best- but he knows that no matter what he does, his best won't be enough. He won't be able to make a dent in the pure fucking misery that is Jamrock. But he needs to, so he drinks, he smokes, he does drugs, he loses any semblance of control he ever had over the voices in his head, the dude telling him to hit shit and the dude telling him to forget everything and just get fucked up and Revachol herself screaming at him about her imminent death. And in the end Dora can't stand it anymore and she leaves (and, honestly, good for her. I'm happy for her. But this is about Harry, and Harry isn't, he isn't able to be happy for her at this point in time).
And like. I personally doubt that she'd have left just because of the money if everything else was good. I honestly even doubt that the money was that big of an issue for her to start with, it was all the other issues first and then the fact that they couldn't even rent a fucking VHS and play it at times became just one more thing on top of this already massive pile of shit that broke the proverbial camel's back. But in Harry's mind, he was never rich enough for her. She was always the middle class girl who settled for the poor fuck, and he was never gonna be good enough for her because he was just a broke dude from Jamrock. She was perfect and so so beautiful and at one point her love was the only thing keeping him going, and then she left because he couldn't even
And from what we can see in the game she was the only person he's ever really, truly loved.
But in his mind, they could never be together again. They could try as they might, but it was never gonna work out, because she was a rich girl and he was just a poor miserable fuck. He grew up looking for change on the streets, she took piano lessons in a fancy part of town. The difference was just too large to ever truly be bridged.
So for post-breakup Harry, prior to Martinaise and even during the events in Martinaise, true love was never actually possible. It is possible only for the new people, in the next world. It was too late for him - he had his chance, and it was an impossible thing, it could never have worked out and now he's wasted it. Because of the inherent differences between different social classes. It is too late for him. So yeah, fuck it, wreak havoc on the fucking middle class. Fuck those rich bastards who took Dora from him, and fuck Dora too.
On another note, this was also one of the most recent cases him and Jean worked on prior to Martinaise. I don't remember the date exactly, but it was in his last ledger, it must have been pretty recent. Do you think he saw the mural and thought about it the same way I did? Maybe this was the one that truly pushed him over the edge? The impossible love. It truly was too late for him. The only way to fix it is a new fucking start. And how do you get that?
After life - death. After death - life again.
#disco elysium#harry du bois#harrier du bois#dora ingerlund#DE#herr's personal tag#next world mural#when first playing the game I didn't even really stop to think about the middle class line#the love part of the mural honestly felt very powerful to me#and I opened the compartment and read the letter right afterwards#so i had a lot to think about in addition to just this#anyway#this is more of a “what if” rant than any actual metaanalysis#our story about Dora is extremely influenced by Harry's point of view#but at the same time#every design decision in this game is deliberate#or most of them anyway#is this something the game designers were actually thinking of when designing the mural?#was that an intentional decision on their side?#or is it just me reading too much into random shit while missing important details elsewhere again?#who knows#midnight rant
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reading the third last binding book and god i love robin blyth so much literally everybody loves him everybody wants to fuck him he's a complete sweetheart a good egg he just looks pretty kisses his boyfriend sees the future and punches bad guys he has done nothing wrong ever in his life
#robin every time edwin opens his mouth : that's my boyfriend!! mine!!#love how both jack and alan pov are equally begrudgingly obsessed w him too#they're both like. well i Would. if i could#a marvellous light#the last binding#a power unbound
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a little update on what i've been doing in the sims lately! don't mind the huge walls of text for once i'm saying things in the post instead of the tags lmao
matthias's scars are very slowly coming along! i really love his left leg scar but can't really show all of it because i'd have to get him naked for that and it also wraps around his leg. um, but it starts at the side of his hip and carves down at an angle before abruptly following a steep line to the back of his calf. it looks gnarly which is exactly what i'm trying to achieve with matthias's scars! i'm also pretty pleased with the scars on his wrists and side, but the scar he has on the back of his right leg is... a little too crunchy? i don't know, it just looks weird. it's kind of hard to get the scars i'm making to look good on matthias's body. especially scars that're smaller or delicate... like the instant loss of quality makes me want to chew on exposed wires. but that's where i've left off on them! his arms and back are where he has the most damage but my god... it's SO difficult trying to get scars to look nice over his biceps and back muscles. also the hair ties i made for him look nice on his wrist <3
theo's apartment is also finally in the works. i've got the base layout finished and a general idea of what all the rooms are for. building and decorating isn't actually that daunting to me, surprisingly—instead, what's actually causing me a lot of grief is the realization that this is too big for theo to really be comfortable in. so, i was thinking, okay, that's fine, just get rid of three of the rooms and scale down the living area. only to pause and take into account the fact that theo's parents pay for this. they're controlling and also very big on appearance so i'm not sure they'd be fine with their son living in a shoebox—i mean, what would people say if word got to them that he doesn't even have a walk-in closet? like... that's the kind of people they are. but i wanted theo to feel comfortable in his apartment so now i'm feeling conflicted on how i want it to look. i'm definitely going to scale down the bedrooms and the living area... but it'll still feel too big to theo. there are just too many corners for him to ever fully let his guard down... which, hm... well, maybe that fits the story more anyway.
this is his general aesthetic for the interior btw... i want it to be brown, cream, and green all throughout the apartment with splashes of orange (this mix between his old dorm and his childhood home but with something new blending it together). i really wanted him to have stained glass windows in his kitchen and bathroom but couldn't find any </3 so sadly that's not happening. and i need to find a nice curio cabinet for his collection of bells... along with bells too lmao. but that's where i'm at so far! i'm seriously going to just sit here in build mode for hours just... trying to figure out how to make this place more comfortable for theo. like it's supposed to be where he feels safe but it's just too much rn.
#river dipping#matthias evanoff#theodore doe#echthroi#also if anyone has any tips on getting scars or other skin details to look good let me know please...#i'd love to try projection painting again but my laptop is too slow and i can't get opengl to function on my desktop </3#like i get an error every time i try to open matthias's .obj and even reddit is failing me on a fix for it <///3#and okayyy theo's apartment!! i'm so torn up abt it now#but does his bed not look super fucking comfortable...#i might have to change his bed to that queen bed in the guest room just because the one in theo's room is... interestingly colored.#i'm going to recolor it to just plain white/cream sheets... and maybe mess with the mesh a bit. really i should test the bed in game#bc i'm not sure it'll work very well...#i wanted theo to have a wooden headboard but all of the ones i had like that just didn't look like he could nestle into them#he's just. a little guy. if i can't picture theo curling up in the center of the bed then it just won't work#but yeah. that’s my update ☝️#........i'm super excited to start on the home matthias buys shortly after he starts falling in love with theo btw#the floor plan in my head is so beautiful and it's all very open... bc <3 matthias was thinking abt putting theo in his home from the jump#long post
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G'raha looked so serious while he pleaded his case to venture into the World of Darkness with the Warrior of Light. The sudden conviction in his tone had Arsay at a loss for words. Still, she did not hesitate to meet his request with an accepting nod. He was an important friend and in the passing moons that they'd come to know each other, a strong fondness for him had taken hold of her. The prospect of helping G'raha find the truth behind his mysterious inheritance made Arsay's heart pound. It was the perfect venture for them to embark on. The first of many, she hoped. The two turned towards the impossibly tall spire that dared to pierce the heavens above. Arsay's resolve strengthened in its presence. When they next find themselves gazing at the tower -with their quest completed and the world no longer under threat of total destruction- she'll properly ask G'raha to be a companion in her travels. A grin crept its way onto her face as her gaze shifted to him. If Arsay could find it within herself to bare her heart to others so readily just as he does… perhaps their future adventures will find them together, hand in hand.
#ffxiv#wolgraha#WOL posting#G'raha tia#Arsay Nun#graharsay#idk just a random passage in my head that I needed to get out#im not a writer and im not pretending to be one but it was in my brain so sorry if its not as readable as I think it is#anyways imagine you are the loneliest catgirl in the world#and you meet a guy who is so swagless and cringe but in a charming way and he connects with you on a fundamental level#and you become really good friends and every time you show up he smiles in a way that makes your heart do somersaults#and you start thinking that maybe people actually like having you around not just when they need you to kill and destroy things#you let yourself open up a little and you're met with kindness and you realize you are very in love actually#but because you're still figuring out how to talk about your feelings you wait a little too long#and that guy seals himself up in a tower and tells you he'll think about your heroism in the future#and you are very sad and angry about this but thats not allowed so instead you put that energy to being the hero of all time#and every day you go to work you see the structure that reminds you of him and you cant let go of those what if feelings n ur cursed 5ever#would that be fucked up or what
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The hands holding yours are not clean either.
VegasPete + Hands || KinnPorsche (2022)
#Disclaimer: I have very complicated feelings about this show and this couple after everything that's happened over the past month#I actually started these in late december for a friends birthday but the colouring ended up so complicated I didnt get it done#and while I'm still untangling how I feel about the fandom and fan culture and the whole situation (tldr: bad sad parasocially betrayed lol#I was so proud of these for my 3rd ever gifset the absolutely insane amount of time I spent on the colouring and masking against shaky shot#like I genuinely had to keyframe adjust about 8 different overlapping layers frame-by-frame for at least 1 of these lol#and perhaps selfishly: I need to post bc I can't bring myself to work on new sets while this was staring back at me every time i opened PS#And I'm proud of it and it meant a lot and even though the shape of the fandom and friendships have changed its still worth something to me#anyway. enough rambling. on to the actual tags lol#VegasPete#kinnporche the series#vegas theerapanyakul#pete saengtham#asiandramasource#asianlgbtqdramas#lgbtedit#vegas kp#pete kp#idk idk idk I feel like this is my one last little love letter to these silly little characters that meant a lot to me#and to the friends that inspired it too#on a lighter note: the caption is an adapted taemin lyric and the colours were inspired by the criminal MV lmao#so like lol its not that deep :')#aaaand post.#bee.gif#kpts
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Judas Tree: unbelief, betrayal.
Purple Hyacinth: my regrets follow you to the grave.
Asphodel: i am sorry, please forgive me.
#the eret#dsmp#faeskech#finished#ITS DONE OH MY GOD IM FREE#AND I DID IT BEFORE THE YEAR END TOO#yall dont fucking understand ive had this in my wips folder since february this year#it wasnt difficult at all to do and i love how it turned out#but for some reason every time i opened this file i would get irrationally angry and have to close it after 15 minutes#and then i wouldnt open it for another 2-4 weeks#i finally said fuck this last night and spent an hour to finish it#AND OUT OF THE WIPS FOLDER IT GOES#NO LONGER WILL IT LOOM AND TAUNT ME#definitely learned a lot about fabric while doing this#sts
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kenjakus character design is too good
#this goes for geto too I just love the simplicity of the stitches and brain body horror#might delete#kenjaku#myart#id in alt#one day I’ll draw something other than a bust of a character#and color it in#I can’t stop doodling kenjaku every time I open my drawing app
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bisexual men who I want to sink my teeth into and shake around like a chewtoy
#em is yelling#this is honestly applicable to a bunch of guys but obv i am still losing my mind over yesterday. help#it's so bizarre though like. i don't really feel as many weird attachment things with him? he just. puts me so at ease idk idk#like i've been thinking about him constantly since he dropped me off yesterday but i don't feel as much of an urgent need#to have an immediate response to a message i sent#or constant validation he really likes me#i mean the fact that we first got together when i was 16 and we've both tried to get together like every year since is just like.#a sigh of relief?#this person has been through so much and knows that i have too and is just so open and understanding and kind in such subtle ways#and it's just. a lovely experience to get to know him and feel him in small pockets of time even if that's all we get. yknow?
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i think it’s really beautiful how mha slowly makes you realize that “this is the story of how i became the greatest hero” won’t mean what you thought it would. you’re rooting for izuku, thinking he’ll be number one after all might, that’s so cool, that’s a dream come true, and then, oh, wait, maybe the chart does more harm than good. it affected the todoroki family, it’s part of the villains’ social critique and oh, maybe it’s also a bit fucked up, because it creates pressure when you’re at the top, leading you (toshi) to self sacrifice, and maybe it’s also a bit empty, because when endeavor was finally at the top he thought he had a role to play instead of working with sincerity and oh, maybe it’s a bit meaningless at this point because the number two is a kid who was brainwashed to become a weapon and killed a man in cold blood and there’s absolutely nothing heroic about that so is it even a good thing at all? is it even a list that we should or want to strive to be on? the whole system doesn’t work, the old generation wants to kill and sweep the core of the problem under the rug meanwhile the mc wants to actually listen, to give villains the time of day, to reach out his hand, to save them or at least to keep trying, which is the actual effort the hero makes. and so you slowly realize that greatest hero doesn’t mean number one hero at all – but something more true and much, much more meaningful.
#people have been discussing this since izuku might lose ofa and i just got hit with the realization of how beautiful this is#and supported by almost every storyline too! todofam stain gentle actually i don’t even need to name them because it’s EVERYWHERE#this is about the whole new gen ofc because he also speaks in plural at times (WE became the greatest heroES) but ch412 filled me with the#urge to open my window and scream IZUKU MY MOST BELOVED I LOVE YOU FOREVER#the whole point is. never give up [in tears] mha i love u forever#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#mha#bnha#my post
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Reminiscing 💔
My first time participating in the Obiyuki AU Bingo in years~ the prompt was “video game” so ofc I had to do something Rimworld-related <w< the now-baroness and baron Shirayuki and Obi having a tender moment outside of their settlement, mourning the loss of two of their sons, Dario and Fukuro. They lost their lives to a flu outbreak. As head medic, Shirayuki took their deaths particularly hard.
AnS (c) Akizuki Sorata
Art: Me
#akagami no shirayukihime#ans#snow white with the red hair#obiyuki#obiyuki bingo 2023#rimworld!au#myart#in which we space kitties#i simplified a lot this time to not end up spending a week on every entry#but if i dare say so myself#this came out lovely#cw child death#the jewel in shirayuki’s forehead is the amplifier to her psychic powers#which was granted to her along with her title#obi has one too but idk where#their settlement is called stonefalls#and has been built into the solid rock of a mountain#opening out towards the fells
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Favorite Pacey/Joey Moments Per Episode: 3x12 A Weekend in the Country (Part 1)
#sorry not sorry too many good scenes not to keep making mega posts#pacey going above and beyond for joey thats the post#the cold open in the beginning is hilarious#every time i watch this episode it cracks me up#paceyjoey moments#pacey x joey#joey x pacey#pacey witter#joey potter#love#katie holmes#joshua jackson#gif#gifs#gifset#dawsons creek#3x12
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Ohhh heheheeeeeHEHEEHHEEEEE giggles and rubs my hands together evilly. so we’ve had cult leader!geto and you who’s mad at him… and we’ve also had you who’s slowly accepting loving him…. But what about cult leader!geto and reader that’s just. Moved on. Accepted it when he left because of the understanding that it’s just the way life goes. Doesn’t mean to say that you didn’t miss him, that you still don’t, it just means that you understand that there’s no point being angry about things you can’t change, so you let it go. Obviously, it’s sugu. There’s no replacing him. But you don’t try to replace him, you just carry on with life. You find other people who are special to you and you don’t try to fill the hole he left in your heart, you accept it, heal it, and work around it. He sees you again years later and he excepts you to be angry at him — wishes that you’d be angry at him — but you’re not, you just smile at him. There’s no anger in your eyes, no bared teeth or quips of bitterness, just a soft kind of understanding that you can forgive him and carry on with your life without allowing him back in. IM ACTUALLY GOING INSANE PLEASE…. It’s not quite you forgiving him and loving him, moreso just understanding and accepting that he was someone very special, but just not accepting him into your life again. He can’t exactly tame you because you’re not angry. There’s no storm to wait out, there’s no rage for him to soothe. Nonchalance and acceptance I think is the best way to combat him methinks… :333 OMGGG think of that beabadoobee song “the way things go” ohhhhh..
“Passed your house when I was on the train, in my mind you’ll always stay the same.” “And there’s so much left to say, I guess I’m just the bigger guy.” “A distant memory I used to know, oh I guess that’s just the way things go.” SCREAMS!!!! AUGGHHH IM SORRY THIS IS WAY TOO LONG BUT. AUGHH I could scream ab sugu forever…. <333 — stsg anon !!
STSG ANON i need you to know that this broke me. gutted me. i feel numb inside THIS IS SUCH A TASTY SCENARIO I’M SCREAMING
okay so. just putting this out there; i think this would break him. lmao. this is the cruelest thing you could do to him because it’ll hurt him like nothing else. and he deserves it!! this is the best possible scenario for you, but the worst for him. and that’s just….. soooo bittersweet.
He sees you again years later and he excepts you to be angry at him — wishes that you’d be angry at him — but you’re not, you just smile at him. There’s no anger in your eyes, no bared teeth or quips of bitterness, just a soft kind of understanding that you can forgive him and carry on with your life without allowing him back in.
goshhhh stsg anon…………. the way you wrote this…………. :(((( i’m in awe of you always. this made me so so emotional i’m just ……… hhhhhhh…… my heart is crumbling a tiny bit but i’m gonna try to be coherent…… T_T
i think geto would be happy for you. i think that despite his own feelings, he’d ultimately make the painful choice to respect your wishes and stay out of your life. it hurts him but there’s also this sense of inevitability — this is the natural consequence of his actions. he was a fool for expecting anything else, hoping for anything else. but a part of him always wished that you could be together again; and i think that wish hurts him more than anything.
geto really is just a lonely guy at the end of the day, and the thing about his ideal world is that it doesn’t even just boil down to a world without non-sorcerers — to geto, it boils down to a world where i don’t have to see my loved ones suffer. that’s what he wants more than anything!! and i think that even though he knows it’s unrealistic, even impossible, a part of him was always hoping that you’d wait for him to create that world for you. that you could one day go back to the way things were.
so meeting you again, and being forced to accept that it just won’t happen… that he’s just a person of your past and nothing else…. yeahhhh. it breaks him a little. then again, he always wished for your forgiveness; at least he has that. at least he knows you don’t hate him. there’s a kind of comfort in that, even though he probably would’ve preferred feelings of hatred to no feelings at all. :(
no but this is genuinely heartbreaking from geto’s pov and it’s even worse because you’re just doing what’s best for you!!! there’s no anger, no hard feelings, and it irks him because there’s nothing he can do!! you’re so right stsg anon!!! there’s no storm to wait out, there’s no rage for him to soothe….. there’s nothing he can do to change your mind. it just is what it is.
i also think this forces him into unveiling himself. this is just my own take but my interpretation of cult leader!geto is that he’s pretending to be something he’s not like . 80% of the time…. i think he copes by creating all these new personas, silly and overbearing and cruel, when deep down he’s still just sad and a little bit lost. a little lonely. it’s very telling that he felt the need to create a new family, because that’s just the kind of guy he is — he needs to have people around him to protect and cherish. very similar to gojo (stsg soulmatism strikes again)…. when he meets gojo in jjk 0 he feigns nonchalance, but later, when he’s watching the sunset and thinking about their history, he just looks sad. resigned. there’s a softness he’s trying to hide, but it never quite leaves him.
and i think that with you being so open, so sincere, he really wouldn’t have any choice but to meet that with a sincerity of his own. i can see him giving you one last sad smile, and honestly telling you that he’s happy for you. that he wishes you nothing but the best. and he truly means it. he wants you to be happy more than anything; it’s fine if he can’t be there to see it.
it’s a shame, but he’ll learn to live with it — for you.
so anyway this made me cry AND THEN YOU TOP IT OFF WITH BEABADOBEE????????? ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME????????? THAT SONGGGGG STOP STOP PLEASE I CANT TAKE IT 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 it’s so geto i’m abt to throw up blood
can’t remember how to say your name // let alone count all the freckles on your face // a distant memory i used to know // oh, i guess that's just the way things go // oh, i guess that's just the way things go
can’t remember when you said you called // miles away, and it was still my fault // the love you said you had, it sometime showed // oh, i guess that's just the way things go // oh, i guess that's just the way things go
passed your house when i was on a train // in my mind, you'll always stay the same // i’m happy now, i ought to let you know // but i guess that's just the way things go // oh, i guess that's just the way things go // and i don’t mind that that's the way things go.
:(((((( stsg anon i’m not even joking this made me tear up …… he’s just so lonely. you’ll always be you, and he’ll always be suguru. i don’t think he could ever stop being fond of you, even if you were to forget him one day. in my mind, you’ll always stay the same………….. sniffle. he’ll always, always remember you.
#if u listen closely u will hear the sound of me sobbing . pls ignore this#STSG ANON WHEN I CATCH UUUUUUUUUU#ALSO pls plspls never worry about ur asks being too long THEYRE NEVER TOO LONG!! i love reading them sm!!!!!#feel free to drop a whole fic in here ill eat it up happily#TYSM FOR UR THOUGHTS <333333 every time i get an ask from u it’s like opening my fridge and finding a fresh treat :33 ily!!!#no but pairing this w a beabadoobee song is genuinely so evil i cried real tears he’s sooo beabadobee coded … so mitski coded …..#wahhhhhh i miss him :((((((( i wanna give him a big hug.#ask tag ✩#stsg anon !! ✩
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Why I Am Not Coming In To Work Today [abridged], Jess Zimmerman
part one | part two
#toronto maple leafs#HELLO EVERYBODY THIS HAS BEEN MONTHS!!! MONTHS IN THE MAKING BECAUSE i AM UNHINGED AND NEEDED THE PRECISE PICTURES THAT I KNEW I WOULD GET#like. seventy five percent of this has been done since the first time i posted this and while it has gotten better with time because#my narratives simply got more complex and there's so much of this that is For Me but don't worry i will explain but aLSO goddamn mitch coul#you have gotten married any later in the year. also willy you truly disappointed me by not getting an absurd haircut this year (now that#i've said this he's going to debut it on instagram like. tomorrow. but anyway that meant y'all got to enjoy my neuroses of#Loving Tyler Bertuzzi who is a goddamn leaf. the joys of having to wait to post this (was not a leaf at the time i started it) and anyway i#have at length i think had the breakdown about tyler in pigtails girl dad & how i got a bob & then tyler copied me which was rude. that's m#gender. ANYWAY starting from the top we got sheldon keefe documentation which was really just the personal decision that i wanted all the#coaching staff to be the markers in the poem/the bold & also at the TIME keefe hadn't re-signed &we thought it might be everybody out w/kyl#anyway the title of the scrap of an old lover's flannel is literally 'u think this is about sheldon & kyle NO it's about timothy liljegren'#bc. liljegren was on the marlies winning cup team & has had a contentious relationship w/keefe ever since & was healthy scratched in playof#& the narrative is sooooo. also at one point for the ryan o'reilly i was going to edit the stlb out of his grandma's shirt or cover it w/th#childhood dreams line but THEN i found the gio snapped stick one which was too perfect for 'crumbling copy' the ryan o'reilly To Me is so.#ur insane in ways u did not think for that one. like. how soft her hands were. his grandma you guys. he grew up a leafs fan. if he ever get#to lift the cup with her again i will lose my shit. the cup run a movie i remember nothing--OKAY the spezz one i knew i needed him stresse#but also i believe in the spezz/kyle narrative so. it comes up later don't worry ALSO SPEZZ FOLLOWING HIM TO PITT CAME AFTER I MADE THIS bu#the muzz tea one makes me a little sensy bc muzz was out with an injury for most of this season & it was a really scary spinal one & so yea#& then the simmer one just straight up makes me cry bc i love him so much & the work that he does for anti-racism in hockey means so much &#if you have that video open & watch it i promise you will cry i do every time it's so beautiful he had to be on comforted by beauty & sammy#boy is on the a man who doesn't know me because EYE remember the caps goalie tandems. baby lilya. the mo one is a little funny bc it is#solely due to wade's thread about mo rielly the coal miner homestead husband. that's why he moves to omaha also i think it suits him (quiet#OK NOW OLD MEN IN LOVE NARRATIVE this one's in contention for my fave bc it's spezz coping w/retirement fundamental meaningless of existenc#u heard abt tyler already that's for me the minchy picture was just too good i had found it earlier & i spent SO LONG looking for an empty#leafs rink picture for bathtub i have some cool construction photos but i wanted the melting ice ones (thought about tahoe lol) & the sprin#one i manip'd a lot bc i needed a spring picture bc playoffs clinch in spring & that one fit so coincidentally perfect bc it's 7 straight#seasons 7 guys so. :) & i KNEW i swore to god they did more milk advertising i knew i was gonna do this one from the minute i saw the poem#the milk patch & it took a hot minute BUT I FOUND THIS ONE this one's for funsies. AND THE PIC I WAITED SO FUCKING LONG FOR this is actuall#from kerf's wedding but i was like i know on god mitch is getting married this summer & that's about to be the drunkest shenanigans wedding#i'm waiting for the pics. & then i was BLESSED with this one which is beautiful & perfect & LOOK AT THEM. anyway the last one is bc
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Hello again, I'm here to request once more. Feel free to take all the time you need btw! I would always be patient for your wonderful works ^^
This time I'd like to request from the Drabble List#2 - 47 with the 020607 Trio (mainly Mahiru though). And yes, this is hugely inspired by that one minigram with Mahiru. And as usual, feel free to change the scenario and/or the characters.
Thank you again, good luck with your future studies and take all the time you need!!
Woo thank you so much!! :'D This one was a ton of fun (and once again led me to get smacked in the face with unlikely character parallels I wasn't aware of before). It's from Kazui's pov but it's still mainly about Mahiru. I ended up going canon-compliant, but I did consider sticking super close to the minigram and do a little normal-au where Mahiru drags them across Japan to make a perfectly homemade cake 😅
Everyone knew Mahiru had a tough time distinguishing genuine from joke, but Kazui hadn’t expected it to come back to bite him. Mahiru wasn’t stupid by any means; sometimes she just forgot that others weren’t as unabashedly honest as herself. When she said something, she meant it. Kazui… not so much.
Which is why, following a conversation about her skills in the kitchen, in response to being pressed about his own household, he thought it would be inconsequential to utter the following words to her.
“Bake me a cake, and we’ll talk.”
Kazui had laughed his booming laugh, Mahiru had giggled in her sweet little way. Neither realized what had just transpired.
That is, until Yuno dragged Kazui across the prison the following day to make him aware of the monster he had released upon the kitchens. The two hurried over to find a massive operation underway: Mahiru had several layers in the works, she was stirring multiple fruit fillings, decoration choices scattered across the countertop, and anyone who dared venture too close was shooed away with a slap from her wooden spoon.
It took a few minutes to get the situation all worked out.
“So… you didn’t really want a cake…?” She asked, pausing mid-stir. Her eyes were so big and round.
Yuno came to the rescue. “Of course he does!” She interrupted. “Everyone here would die for a taste of your baking~”
Kazui nodded. “I just didn’t mean for you to work so hard for my sake. I’m really not worth all this effort…”
Mahiru’s jaw fell, offended on his behalf. “Yes you are!” Her attention was momentarily caught by a timer chiming. Kazui took the bowl from her so she could take a pan from the oven. He picked up where she left off stirring.
“Either way, why don’t I help you out?” Yuno had grabbed some ingredients from the counter as well. “While we bake, I’ll tell you a little bit about myself. A little,” he repeated.
And he did. Her questions were easier than he’d expected. While the others knew how to poke and prod about each other’s murders, Mahiru really did just want to know about his home life. While she buzzed around the kitchen switching pans and creating intricate icing patterns, she asked him about his childhood, his hobbies, his job. As soon as she saw his wife was a touchy subject, she let it drop (though with a bit of disappointment, to be sure). He scrambled a bit as Yuno the human lie detector would shoot him a look now and then. Overall, though, his measured answers managed to satisfy both women without giving much of himself away.
When they carried the spectacular cake into the common room to everyone’s amazement, Mahiru prodded him with her elbow.
“We should talk more! I mean, come on. How difficult was that?”
If only she knew the half of it.
———
“Hey, Mahiru.” Kazui traded weak smiles with Yuno as he joined her by the bed.
“Oh. Hi Kazui,” came her weak voice. She tried her best to smile under the tangle of bandages that surrounded her. Then, silence.
Aside from a few coughs and small requests, that silence stretched on for hours. He and Yuno usually had a lot to talk about, but neither could muster anything up today.
He thought Mahiru had dozed off, but she surprised him by taking his hand. “Kazui?”
“Yes?”
“Do you really think I’m unforgivable?”
He blinked. “I can’t really say.”
The moment the words left his lips, he knew they were the wrong ones. Well, the glare that Yuno was trying to murder him with also helped. “Er, I forgive you, of course. But… I don’t know anything about you, Mahiru. Not really. I can’t say why others would think you’re unforgivable or not.”
“...I see.”
Yuno looked like she wanted to add something, but couldn’t find the words. Traces of emotions flickered over her face before she could cover them up. Kazui guessed she wanted to defend Mahiru. But maybe she also agreed with him. And that was when the realization struck him.
“I guess, I always thought you were so much better than me and Yuno when it came to talking about yourself. You do it all the time, and very easily. But now that I think about it, I probably know just as much about your situation as you know about mine. For such an honest person, you hide everything just like we do. Or maybe, you hide from everything, like we do.”
More silence.
A teary smile appeared on her face. “You know… you could bake me a cake… and maybe we’ll talk.”
Kazui didn’t laugh, and she didn’t giggle. He nodded, solemnly. “I think that’s a good idea.”
#milgram#mahiru shiina#kazui mukuhara#yuno kashiki#i know yuno faded a bit into the background but shes in the same boat as kazui ;-;#i love that minigram so much asdfdsf she would have such massive ambitious projects 😅#(and if the day 16 feast is any proof we know she really can pull them off!!)#so i think she could make this spectacular cake with limited prison resources -- the problem is no one is actually asking her to...#i know all the prisoners arent super open about their crimes but like if you ask the others directly it feels like theyll say a few things#even just to defend themselves#but yuno-mahiru-kazui may not even give you that much...#also picturing kazui very bad at baking so yuno definitely helps him with that cake he promises mappi :')#thank you so much for your kind words and patience ahh <3#i actually struggled a lot with this one (as in it took a while to physically write despite having the ideas early on) so it meant a lot ✨#i was so obsessed with this one --#one day i want to expand that first section and play out their actual conversation - i just love the concept of them baking and chatting#yuno coughing or bumping into kazui every time she can tell hes lying#mahiru subtly hiding things too without realizing#and cake shenanigans of course#it was way too much to cram into a drabble without getting lost but i do want to eventually 😤#and thank you-- studies are going well 😤 wishing you well in your current endeavors!#drabbles
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