dottie my dear friend dottie i need that kikura essay

My dearest friend Ari you probably know all of this already FDSFDSFJLSD

Classmates. Maybe less.

I think the relationship between Uotora and Beika is "I know you better than anybody". And i think between Kikura and Beika is "I understand you better than anybody", despite how different they are, and how far they've come together, because they did not like each other AT ALL at first.

I think of them as being foils to Ichiya, and having a reversal of his character arc. Despite being Splatlandian, Kikura grew up in Inkopolis but their family had to move back to Splatlands when their fortune took a turn for the worse, which Kikura... disliked. Kikura , kinda spurred by how their family thought of Splatsville, thought themselves better than everyone in Splatsville through the virtue of being raised in Inkopolis and made this very well known to anyone.

I think they are quite the formidable fighter now, but back then their attitude got them bullied a lot. I especially headcanon people used to pull their hair to piss them off, which they could do nothing about since their mother wanted their hair to stay long, no matter how much they wanted to cut it. Speaking of parents, I think they had very controlling and over-perfecting tiger parents that to a degree meant well but overall restricted Kikura. They thought through their smarts (which i headcanon them to be, quite so) they could make it back to Inkopolis and (bring their family with them as a duitful child and) never have to think about Splatsville ever again. With all this stress and discontentment, their form escapism from Splatsville and their parents was... That one demo from that Inkopolis band that got leaked on the internet.

So Kikura's "shit" taste got someone specific's attention, and Beika told as much to their face that she thought their taste was shit, and reccomended some better stuff.

More under the read more bc you'll never guess, this got long

They didn't get along at ALL. Beika was kind of the person Kikura could not stand, satisfied with everything Splatsville could give her without wanting more (as far as they knew). And yet, because there seemed to be no true malice, mostly snark and sarcasm that Beika matched Kikura in energy, they. Talked. Mostly because there was no one else who would talk to them.

They were asshole kids angry at the world in their own way, but Beika seemed to be especially able to get under Kikura's skin.

"Does your parents know you are listening to -agasp- Rock Music?? Or is it your way of rebelling?" (They did not. Yes, it was.)

"Do you only do things your parents tell you to do" (Pretty much.)

"Will you ever do anything for yourself?"

And with how competitive and how much of a perfectionist Kikura was, i think they found themselves wanting to somehow impress this inkling and prove her wrong.

I think Kikura used to basically dream about doing somethign crazy like, learning the guitar, and the guitarist from that SQSQ being also self-taught gave them... hope? It's not quite hope but like, it felt like if they went out of their way, they could actually do it. WELL, if they didn't fear their parents' anger and dissapointment.

Well now they found pettiness in their heart, so they got themselves a guitar as soon as possible, in secret. The unbridled joy and terror they felt, the adrenaline rush kept them practicing more and more until Uotora learnt about them, and forced Beika to accept letting Kikura into the band and play.

Bit by bit, Beika (and Uotora who is an angle but also at times a pushover) got Kikura to rebel in small other ways till they were able to cut their hair.

As their love for the band grew, they came to appreciate the town that made them who they were. I think in their current state they are rather embarrased of the little shit they used to be. They started to wanting to stay and make Splatsville a better place.

I think Kikura realized Beika was hurting due to... Something, that she didn't talk about and Uotora glazed over. Something in the shape of Beika's ex guitarist hanged in the air. As the trust grew between them, Beika bit by bit told the story of how she was left behind and learnt to not want much from life, that thing Kiki hated about her. She and Uotora painted the picture of a selfish person Kiku came to hate for hurting their only true friends. (Uotora might have even exaggrated a bit) But I think they realized the full scale of everything when they heard the song C-side was playing on the radio. Things made a lot more sense then.

They made it their duty to become the best guitarist that there is. They had the ambition, they knew how to study and practice. And as it turns out, biggest idiots in town taught themselves how to play the guitar, so it shouldn't be too hard.

I think them leaving for a while was Beika getting it into her head that Kikura would leave too, and pushing Kiku away until Kiku was basically made to leave. I think it was a nasty fight they didn't thought they would recover from, but they easily did with how much the two cared for each other. (This isn't like a full-fledged idea, perhaps i can talk about it another day uwu) With the confirmation one way or another, Kiku would always end up coming back, Beika loved them as freely as can be.

In some way Beika and Kikura gave each other the means of saving themselves, in a way saving each other. So, yeah. owo.

something that i've been struggling to articulate but has been bothering me for a while is how some christians engage and interact with science and what i'm realizing is they have a like... almost love-bombing/discarding relationship with it. and i recognize science isn't a person and that's not literally happening but the christians that i grew up around have this relationship with science where it's real/valid/correct if it supports their side and fake/invalid/wrong if it doesn't. it's this like... engaging with science to get something from it when it can prove their point and condemning it when it doesn't. and this also ties into the belief that you, a layperson with no background in science, are more knowledgeable than actual scientists simply because you have god on your side, and therefore you can use science in whatever way you see fit, which means engaging with it in a way that is ultimately anti-science (but that also doesn't matter because god said it was okay). and it's exhausting engaging with these people for me because it's not that they believe all science bad, it's that they believe most science bad but some science good and they have the authority to determine what is bad and what is good, despite, again, not having a background in science (because what is a "background in science" to an all-knowing god that you have a personal relationship with?). the thing that is so frustrating to me is how these people recognize science is valued and use it to strengthen the validity of their points and to gain credibility while simultaneously refusing to acknowledge the validity of science as a field at all or put in any effort to understand/respect it.

i think asura is very intriguing but in the like i love exploring how fucked up asura is as a character. Like.

We are given just enough about him to piece together how he got to the point where he is, but not enough to fully have a detailed backstory, but you don't need a detailed backstory to understand the basic facts of this god's life:

He was made, a full adult, and he just simply was. He did not grow up, he was not born, he was simply made.

He is afraid of all things, and many things. Asura's anxiety and paranoia has made him a very sad and pitiable man before becoming a kishin. He couldn't speak up properly and mumbled every single thing he said. He would cover his face in scarves, and wear six shirts. He was that afraid.

He ate his weapon partner eventually because of his paranoia.

He became a kishin soon after gaining the ability to eat souls after devouring his weapon partner.

From then on, he has enjoyed a more erratic and hysterical and manic personality, feeling the extremes of every emotion he couldn't feel prior thanks to his anxiety.

With all of these, it's not hard to put in the puzzle pieces with a few more breadcrumbs:

Asura was a fragment of Lord Death, mainly his fear, and that is why he was so afriad.

Asura was not one to make friends or get close to anyone, he has been very isolated his entire life and he was afraid of even his weapon partner.

He devoured his weapon partner, a very out of the blue thing for everyone because nobody knew how far he was spiraling then, and started descending into a way to defeat his fears, eventually becoming a kishin and finding that peace he's been looking for.

He does not feel remorse, or regret. And from his perspective, why should he? Asura finally found peace after his entire life being nothing but fear, and anxiety, and paranoia, and now he feels free from those awful and terrifying thoughts that had a hold on him. Now he can show his face, speak confidently, he can smile and laugh with everyone, he's not afraid anymore. He's no longer afraid! It's a win, it's a win for him at the cost of everyone else and he doesn't care about everyone else so it's no biggie. I mean if I was Asura, I wouldn't wanna give that up either!

but his very existence is harmful now because of what he has become-- his very presence can drive people to madness and he does not care. So what if other people are afraid now ? Not his problem, not his to deal with.

my man's fucked up but let him be fucked up he's an interesting creacher that way

Added a fourth ingredient to my most complicated food dish I can make >:3 I even wished I had some butter to add! Ill have to remember to buy some ^w^ I don't think I've bought butter in months

forming one-sided beef with my sister's english teacher

Fanny, my sweet, beautiful girl

17.11.2012 – 14.04.2019

i logged into work an hour and a half earlier on friday, worked thru lunch, then continued working after hours, and logged in to work even more hours over the weekend. and this morning i get an email that said i did something wrong (unrelated to the work i did unpaid ot for) and it broke something inside me lmao what if i just quit and walk into the nearest body of water forever and ever ??????

im so so sad i wish i could be an adult

The pinkberry fic I want to read more than anything is 'the end'. I don't know, the more I think about Chloe the more toxic she seems. I analyze the way she behaved in canon and apply it to other aspects of her relationships and honestly, she's probably ruined Brooke's self-esteem beyond simple high school girl fights. Brooke probably bases her own value off of Chloe's opinion of her, and irreversibly so (to some extent), and I bet Chloe knows it, because she did it on purpose. I want a fic where Brooke begs in tears for Chloe to stay because she doesn't know anything but Chloe, because she's endlessly loving and forgiving and, as Chloe spent years constructing and perfecting, she's all Brooke has. And Chloe, finally, after everything, realizes the best thing she can do is leave. That the only way Brooke can ever learn to love herself is if she gets as far away as possible. As a Chloe Valentine hater, that is the only way I will ever see Chloe as truly redeemed.

Anyone else who went to highschool in the mid-late 2010s have to learn about a real life murder trial via a true crime podcast as an english assignment or was that just our school

i genuinely feel so bad for my ex's gf though because she's out here posting on her insta that it's their 3 month anniversary but boyo is making me playlists with unrequited love songs and posts stuff about being nostalgic about when we were dating, keeps complimenting how i look, and literally yesterday was telling me he still has the sticker we stole from the library where we held hands and cuddled like. he's such an important friend to me but really i guess i will have to cut him off (again) bc i thought we were both over this but apparently not and it's just going to hurt a lot of people if i don't

some of y’all should. go outside. touch some grass maybe.

i think as time goes on itll be easier to like the beatles as long as we keep up the trend of younger people not liking them.

Hm I'm not putting this in yhe main tags bc. Yeah but I'm blocking ppl who call the step mother hot

sometimes i'll just be chilling with my bf and i start talking about something weird that happened to me as a kid/when i was younger and it turns out that was a whole ass trauma and then we sit there looking at each other like 😮