#i just wrote this in like 30 minutes so
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98. “if we weren’t in public right now i’d have my head between your legs” 👀
READICUS. Okay. Alright. I've caught the context disease from you though.
Rated M | tags: language, flirting, dirty talk, so much discussion about sex they might as well be having it, getting together, FWB to lovers
😉😉😉😉😉😉😉😉😉😉😉😉😉😉😉
It was just grocery shopping.
They were in a grocery store.
Eddie should not be getting hard watching Steve pick out the ripest bananas.
Like, genuinely, even he knew this was as ridiculous as it could get.
It's just that they'd been casually fucking for the last few weeks, letting off steam, just dudes helping dudes through their synchronous dry spells, and watching Steve pay so much attention to a fucking banana was a lot for Eddie to wrap his mind around.
Casually fucking might not even be the right term.
It was more like...fucking like rabbits.
Eddie spent more time at Steve's house than he spent at his own, and most of that time was spent either naked or trying to be.
He spent the night last night, and only agreed to come shopping with Steve after a very convincing blowjob against the kitchen counter.
It was working for them.
Except for how much Eddie loved Steve. Not like a friend, or a brother, or the way he loved his Hellfire minions. He loved Steve in the "would marry you in Vegas and have tons of babies with you if you wanted" way.
So embarrassing.
Especially taking into consideration that there was no way Steve saw their arrangement as anything more than convenient.
He watched as Steve finally settled on the perfect bunch of bananas and shuffled back to the cart that Eddie was leaning on.
Eddie leaned forward as Steve leaned over the cart, his lips brushing against his ear.
"If we weren't in public right now, I'd have my head between your legs," he whispered.
Which was bold of him considering the grocery store was packed with weekend shoppers.
Steve tensed, his body freezing completely as Eddie backed away, smiling and waving at an old lady glaring at him.
"What the fuck, Eds."
Steve's cheeks were fire engine red, his hands gripping the edge of the cart like it was the only thing holding him up.
"What? I just thought you should know how bad I want you," Eddie shrugged.
They flirted with each other all the time, that's what led to their situation in the first place: the flirting went a bit too far and Steve ended up on his lap, rocking his hips back and forth until he came in his jeans.
No big deal.
Just another day.
But never in public, barely even around someone they trusted.
"Here? Now?" Steve squeaked out, eyes widening comically.
"Why not? You're hot," Eddie's hand grazed his lower back, just enough of a touch to tease, not enough to really be noticed by anyone else.
"What the fuck are you doing?" Steve hissed. "You want people to see?"
"No, 'course not," Eddie smirked. "I just want you to feel."
Watching Steve struggle to find words, struggle to flirt, was possibly the biggest win in Eddie's book. If he could pat himself on the back for it, he would.
"We're in public."
"Stevie, I hate to say it, but being in public doesn't really stop me from wanting to get on my knees and suck your dick."
Steve's face got impossibly darker, only spurring Eddie on more.
"If I wasn't so worried about being walked in on, I'd drag you to the bathroom right now. Maybe fuck you in a stall. You'd probably like that, huh? You liked when I fucked you against the shower wall the other day," Eddie let his fingers trace along Steve's arm, subtle, easy to pull away if someone got too close to them.
"Eddie-"
"Or maybe you'd wanna fuck me. I know how much you like throwing me around and showing off sometimes. Think that would work for you?"
Eddie watched as Steve shivered, biting his lip and doing his best to hold back a whine.
"But we won't do that, right? Because only I get to see you like that. The way you fuck me, the way I fuck you, that's just for us, isn't it?"
Steve nodded.
Eddie looked around, confirmed no one was close enough to see, and settled a hand on the front of Steve's jeans.
"This is just for me."
"Yeah, just for you," Steve choked out, his hand grasping at Eddie's wrist to either pull it away or hold it in place. "Eds-"
"I know, Stevie. But we gotta shop. That's what you said when you were on your knees in the kitchen this morning."
"I can shop later," Steve gasped as Eddie's hand squeezed once before pulling away.
They were in public and there was only so much Eddie was willing to try to get away with, but Steve's reaction was everything.
He looked away, focusing on the apples in front of him as if he cared at all about apples when Steve Harrington was hard right next to him.
He froze.
He thought about everything he'd just said, how possessive he'd sounded, how he'd never quite crossed that line before.
How into it Steve was.
He looked back at Steve, who was still staring at him, face almost back to a normal shade, but lips bitten red and eyes glassy.
"Steve?"
"Hm?"
"Do you want that to be just for me?" Eddie should not be having this discussion in the grocery store.
"Do I what?"
"Do you want to be mine? Like, more than just...fucking?" Eddie should not be having this discussion in the grocery store.
"Is that...an option?" Steve was letting him have this discussion in the grocery store.
"If you want it to be."
Every once in a while, Eddie saw this look in Steve's eye, only ever when he was looking at Eddie doing something stupid or funny or when he was messing around with the kids.
He never let himself think that it was anything more than just Steve getting distracted while looking at him.
He could see it now, though, and he couldn't ignore what that look actually was.
"I want it. I want you."
Eddie was fucked. In more ways than one, it seemed.
"You do?"
"Why is that so hard to believe? You've practically been living with me for weeks, dude."
Eddie's lips curled down, disgusted.
"Don't call me dude, oh my God."
Steve laughed.
"I'll make it up to you when we get home," he winked, turning around and pretending that he didn't just make Eddie's brain short circuit.
"I- what-" Eddie sputtered.
"What? Can't handle my mouth? You handle it fine earlier."
God, Eddie loved this man.
"Stevie, how fast can you finish shopping?" Eddie started pushing the cart away, not even sure if he was going in the right direction.
"If you stop distracting me, ten minutes."
"I'll be in the car, then."
#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#stranger things#make me write#this was like a fever dream#i just wrote this in like 30 minutes so#it's fun but my god it needs to be edited i am SURE#this was a fun one!!!!!
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not to romanticize my mental issues but sometimes having adhd is very useful because today during a meeting that could have been an email i kept thinking about crabs wearing small tophats and having little dancing parties and how they'd sound in tap shoes.
and when my boss was like "raquel what do you think?"
i was like "well, i think the others have made good points about this, of course, and i'd be happy to circle around later on it, but i'd love to take a moment and resonate with this before offering my own suggestion. i want to hear what others think before anticipating the client's needs."
and then i went back to not listening but this time it was imagining snails that joust.
#me: hehe funny#the hatemail: you should be fired immediately the fact you are scum enough to NOT LISTEN#in a SINGLE MEETING#that was about a project you DONT WORK ON#means that you are EVIL and SUCKING UP TIME#like bro .... idk how to tell u this sometimes people be in meetings they don't need to be in#i only got asked to participate bc there's an element of the project that resembles#a piece i wrote a while back#and i know this element exists bc#we've already had a meeting where i told them what i did how i did it and what i suggest#so there's nothing else for me to add really#also im close with all the coworkers who are working on that element#and they just gchat me their questions#idk how to tell u this but someone zoning out in a single 30 minute meeting where they LITERALLY#don't work on that project ?#that's just fucking anti-capitalism baby#i was being a revolutionary
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HEY RICH GIRL!!!
ramshackle trio x rich! fem! Reader
TW: Robbery implied, violence implied,
Vinnie being vinnie
────────────────────── ✦
SKIPP
-The first few times you saw it, you probably didn't notice it was a scrap.
-Just a guy you sometimes had small talk with when you saw him around town.
-so focused on the conversation that you didn't notice how two other guys were taking things out of your purse
-or of the eventual feelings you started to develop for the boy.
-At first you didn't get it but then I bought it. Declaring yourself wasn't a problem as you hadn't experienced rejection in your life
-yet you were surprised to see that the guy accepted your confession… I mean, with so few conversations you exchanged a week, had he really managed to get feelings for you too?
-Well, going more into the relationship skipp DEFINITELY wouldn't accept a confession out of convenience, he really doesn't seem to enjoy using a person for that sort of thing
-but having you around is a real relief.
-Although sometimes he's a little embarrassed to ask you for money, he doesn't even have to, you usually give him money as if you were giving him flowers.
-And don't be afraid to give him things, he will accept and keep anything you give him, no matter if it's simple or something more elaborate.
-he even gets surprised on some of his dates when you insist on taking him to expensive places when he was planning on just going to a field and hanging out together.
-enjoying the company together
-because at the end of the day, it doesn't matter your money or if you take him to fancy places, as long as you and him spend time together he will be satisfied <3
────────────────────── ✦
STONE
-Honestly, at the beginning he didn't notice you much, in fact, he didn't even know your name.
-He's not really the type to be interested in a specific person.
-However, that time you helped the three of them steal some things, you really caught his attention.
-A rich girl helping the poor? He even doubt your intentions for a moment, but it seemed like you did it with good intentions so he don't really question it too much.
-However, you and him continued interacting until eventually it came to something more, even if at the beginning he refused to accept it, he couldn't hide the nerves he used to get when he was next to you or just looked at you…
-he probably even confessed to you by accident by telling this to you, and you just stood there like "so you like me?"
-after that it was kind of awkward, lucky for the boy that you shared these feelings.
-getting more into aspects of your relationship,
I feel like he's not really the type to express his love through gifts or physical affection. He's more about spending time with you or showing that he appreciates you through his actions.
-although it doesn't bother him at all when you insist on giving him gifts and taking him to all sorts of places in ramshackle.
-even if he acts a little angry, he really enjoys spending time with you.
-although that doesn't mean he likes to spend so much time with a crowd of people
-but out of everything, he really appreciates your efforts and sacrifices you make for him so he tries to return the favor... in his own way...
- and he knows that you know that you both know that no matter what, you will always be together
-even though it still bothers you that he smokes and gets drunk
VINNIE
-Let's be honest, she didn't see you as a potential partner at first.
-It's not that she didn't like you or appreciate you, in fact, she was surprised by your kindness as a rich person and that you genuinely got together with her despite your status.
-so you would be partially out of the scams and weekly robberies.
-although you insisted on giving her money, and of course, who was she to refuse?
-Eventually and eventually she started to feel strange when she was around you, I mean, she didn't feel that way with anyone, why with you?
-Skipp was probably the first to find out when he asked her what was that weird feeling in her stomach every time she talked to you.
-and ohh when he found out it was a low blow
-She? Falling in love? It was such a far out scenario that even she didn't think it would ever happen.
-but it happened
-ok, and definitely (again) Skipp was the one who was most supportive of her confessing, stone wasn't that interested but he did his bit each tale
-although even with the extra help you were the first one to propose, haha. -Ok, she doesn't know much how to show her love in a more "cheesy" way so she probably tries to throw compliments at you that end up in a somewhat awkward situation, but no amount of laughter will not lighten the mood.
-She loves it when you give her things, even though sometimes she feels indebted to you, she gets over it quickly.
-do you need support? She is your support! She would never really leave you alone, no matter the situation
Need help beating up some guys? She can do it for you! And even with her eyes closed!
- even if it means you have to stick up for her and her friends when they get in trouble with some of your colleagues.
-But, even with her flaws, Vinnie is the best company you could have, and the best partner you could have wished for.
-even if she did steal money from your mom.
— Not a request, but I wanted to write this, so sorry if it's a bit OOC lol, I'm cooking up a stone one-shot, so stay tuned guys.
#ramshackle#ramshackle x reader#ramshackle x you#stone x reader#stone ramshackle#vinnie ramshackle#vinnie x reader#vinnie x y/n#skipp ramshackle#skippskipping#Skipp x reader#ramshackle pilot#this is so stupid#I write this in like 30 minutes lol#Ignore this I just wanted to write smth#And not letting this blog so abandoned#i wrote this
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you ask people about why they think shadow's characterization is bad in his game and here comes the most surface level criticism of all time. "blabla swear words something something guns" who cares!!!! superficial at best and irrelevant at worst is what this is. not a peep about character motivation or themes
shadow's motivation in this game is to find out who he is. obviously. it's a real identity transexual self-actualization closet queer coming out game. but it's also about how vulnerable minds who are lost and in need of guidance will be manipulated taken advantage of and brainwashed into following those who prey upon them. about how trauma and confusion can be weaponized to lead you to become the worst version of yourself, and how stumbling on the wrong or right information can lead you to very different conclusions.
this is why thematically speaking, the canon ending is the way that it is. none of the other hero endings would cut it because although shadow makes all the morally right decisions in those, it's also not a true representation of who he is as a person, thus having one of them as the true ending would be anthetical to the message of the game. as opposed to the canon ending which offers the complete unforgiving truth the good and the bad... because this time shadow had all the information available to him and thus he was able to make an informed decision that was the most reflective of his core self and what he believes in and cares about . this is what shth is about this is why all the endings are important in their own way (yes, even the edgy ones), it communicates all facets of shadow he can be your angle or yuor devil.... hes literally all of that. hes literally all that and it goes hard as fuck
#it is 1am here and i wrote this in like 30 minutes so take it with a grain of salt#but also ive been trying to find out ways to articulate this for a real long time#kinda struggled to get my point across but oh well (just like the game itself lol)#shth#shadow the hedgehog#blingee.txt
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My insomnia theory is that the MC was also raised by Seki before Tobi but it didn’t work out so he just abandoned him for reals and forgot about him and then took Tobi in…does any of this make sense? Ofc not but it’s really funny to think Seki goes around Tokyo creating generational trauma on kids just because he can
#I have no proof but also no doubts#also Tobi calls him in the insomnia teaser so that’s enough proof to me#the otogiri siblings universe is expanding bro#also yeh I know Seki also abandoned Tobi but he was keeping track of him the whole time I’d like to think Seki just#told insomnia mv to wait at a park 30 minutes away from home and never came back nor kept track of him#which honelsty? pretty in character he would do that#I just realized I wrote insomnia mv instead of mc oops I’m not typing all of that again
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hi so i just finished bridge to terabithia and now i’m unwell and my eyes are red because i’ve been crying before i’d even reached 20 minutes of it for i actually knew what was going to happen and by the time i reached an hour something something i just straight up sobbing screaming into my pillow. and now it’s 12 am and i’m still thinking about them. because god, look at them, how they were, the little world they lived in, wouldn’t you just love that, to run away, to escape, to grasp that childhood naivety and innocence that you lost a long time ago, to feel the sun in your skin and the air in your lungs and to paint fantasies and laugh and play and run hidden away from the world and find an old run down tree house and decided to make it your own little shelter and pin up canvases on the worn wood and paint and let your creativity goes wild and have someone understand you and gets you and do it with you, and wouldn’t you just love to have something so constant, so sincere, so genuine, so pure, so real, that there wasn’t anything else. if i knew i was going to cry this much, if i knew how much space this movie would make in my life, i wouldn’t have started this movie tonight. i would have been in peace on the floor of my room, not realizing how badly i actually want something like this even though i would never unironically admit this to anyone in my life or even myself when i’m outside of the familiar place of my mind, for that matters
#bridge to terabithia#how am i supposed to recover#i wasn’t planning to write a paragraph about it but yeah i kinda love this movie i guess#i needed a good cry and the universe didn’t stop me from choosing this movie i don’t know if that’s nice or simply mean#i was going to watch la la land after this but that’s not gonna happen now#i’m not reading back what i wrote otherwise i would just delete it because i’d think this movie deserves better more coherent thoughts#and i’d say that i’d just rewrite it tomorrow but then i wouldn’t#because nothing would ever beat the “everything i create has to be great or nothing” in me#and i never am proud of what i made unless it’s supposedly only for my viewing#so i actually don’t know if what i just wrote make sense but yeah#my eyes feel so weird right now#also the ending was definitely up to interpretations!! (spoiler alert* just in case)#i myself personally like to believe he dreamed up the last 30 minutes of it and didn’t even go to the museum#and so he’ll just wake up definitely shocked but then still find leslie in her house who was just about to meet him so they could go!!#and because the rope was cut off by the lightning from last night they decide to build the bridge so everyone could cross safe and sound!!#i like my ending better they really should change it#but no all and all the end was really beautiful#even though it took me maybe even an hour to get through it because i keep sobbing and have to repeat over and over to hear what they said#yeah okay anyways sorry for the rant<3#i’m not sure what this is#but glad i could get it off my chest#let’s see how to tag how to tag#movies#just#childhood#whatever <3#nadirants
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literally need my emotional support paper
#need my notebook so bad im gonna EXPLODE#i have a different notebook in front of me but its. not the same. i had dstuff written in the other one#i jsut cant rememebrt ahts why i wrote it down#wish i had super ultra crazy good memory so i could just store everything in my brain#i feel like when ur trying tobuild a lego set but u lost like. 2/3rds of the set#im fine though ill be good in like. 30 minutes. i probably wont even go get it tomorrw ill worry abt it the next day#i dont even need it im find im find imfineimfine#affirmations#when i get my notebook back im gonna b so happy im gonna click my heels together
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I have quite a few messages to get back to, but I have read all of my inbox messages so far, and I am so relieved to have so much support. Thank you so much you guys. I’m so sorry I haven’t responded to many asks or dms yet, I got hit with a flood all at once (which isn’t a bad thing at ALL), I’m just not used to talking to people again so I’m gonna be suuuuper slow with my responses. But I will get back to as many as I can, I cannot tell you how much it means to me that you’ve reached out to me. This is literally my first time in nearly 9 months that I’ve started to speak to people again, I’ve been completely isolated and only spoke to the ex-friend for so long, convinced that I’m too unlovable to receive kindness anymore. I’m shocked at how much positive support I’m getting, I was told for many months that I wouldn’t have anyone on my side. But so many of you have told me that you’ve got my back. I am overwhelmed by all of the love I have received in such a short amount of time and I am so grateful.
I’m a little shaky and tired, writing everything that happened in that post out took a lot out of me, so I’m gonna head to bed pretty soon and then I’ll try to respond to more messages in the next few days if I have the energy.
Seriously, thank you so much to anyone who took the time to message me or write a response. I was so scared that people were going to think I had no right to be upset. And my post is so scatterbrained, I was crying when I wrote it, I have been dealing with so much anger and heartbreak and grief for so long. I wrote it with the mindset of “nobody is going to read this, nobody is going to help me, I have been alone this whole time and nothing is going to change”, but reading all of your kind words has made me feel a little bit like myself again. This is the first time in almost 9 months that I have felt a small bit of weight lift off of my shoulders... it means so much to me. I really care about you guys, even to the ppl I’ve never interacted with directly but you leave Likes on my posts, I see you and I appreciate you. I always remember ppl who extend kindness to me and I promise I never take it for granted.
#i feel so bad im leaving 30 messages just Sitting There but like!!! i am so happy to have you!!!!!#i am so!! relieved!! i know ive said that a million times but its true!!!#i was hurting so bad when i wrote that post and not even 30 minutes go by and you all managed to#make me feel so seen. and so heard.#i feel a little bit of hope now like maybe i AM really capable of feeling love from TF again#i miss starscream so much. i love starscream so so so so much. i will do anything to get him back#thank you guys for having my back and for supporting me 😭😭💖#i feel like ive fallen into a deep dark pit and youre giving me the strength to finally try to crawl out of it#i promise to respond to more messages at least by Thursday 🥺 thank u so much again guys#i hope you have a good night. i love u. be safe. i am sending u so so so much of my love
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Afloat
#horizon forbidden west#hfw#hfw photomode#aloy#wanted to check something for my gf at the end of the poseidon quest#took about two hours longer to complete#because this pic alone kept me for at least 30 minutes#such a pain to align aloy with the dragon and rotate#because despite of what it looks like#it's a +25 rotation#which majorly hurt my brain#they should really have the soundtrack playing in photo mode too#maybe the entire affair would be more relaxing then#(but maybe it's so that i spend some time outside of photo mode as well)#(sure way to get me to wait taking pics is the sun setting somewhere)#(and 'where the wanderer goes' playing in the background)#(ever since i wrote 'transposition' to it that track just holds my entire heart)#(SO GOOD)
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If Red Lantern Rankorr has 1000 haters one of them is me. If he has 100 haters I'm there. If he only has 1 hater that is me. If no one hates him I am no longer on this Earth. I hate Rankorr. Fuck that bitch
LMAOO going through my drafts rn and damn I really hated this guy. I mean I still do but idk this is funny to me
#the fact that i have more drafts than followers...#which ok isnt that impressive theres like 30 of you guys but still all my shitty dc drafts#i say shitty but its really just a mix between posts that i feel like i havent read enough comics to back up fully and dont want to seem#ignorant about (comma) stuff thats more shippy than usual (still like incredibly tame though)#and then like the stupidest fuckin future 0 note posts youve ever seen#also like some reading guides and meta in progress but thats split between here and my notes app generally#its so funny though bc i always get my best ideas abt comics like 2 minutes before one of my classes start#and then i forget about it in my drafts#like theres an absolutely devastating (to me) jess one that has like 2 sentences written#which i should like actually write#what was i saying?#oh and theres a lot of reading guides/comic recs thats where i save those#which now after scrolling thru rlly makes me want to read#where tf was this post going again? oh i was laughing at me hating rankorr#if i wrote comics id ressurect him off panel just to kill him again. if hes dead. i dont remember if hes dead but i think so? who tf knows#blah#i can make a vers without my dumb little comment on here btw if anyone actually wants to rb this lol but i doubt it
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👁👁
I have ur charger. If u want it back u have to hug me.
*sighs and hugs you* Give them back, ya damn gremlin
#red!#and after i wrote you some floyd? i kinda need my chargers so i can actually write ya know#next time i'm squeezing you harder than floyd ^v^#also i'm going to bed; should have been asleep like 30 minutes ago#but i just was finishing up the drabbles for my event; now i got some downtime to rest and decide where to take my wip#but no writing for a few days first; cuz i don't want to burn myself out#know your signs kiddos! and take a break!
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(absolutely zero pressure ask) i wouldn’t suppose you’d be interested in writing some wolfstar hurt/comfort…i’ve been craving your wolfstar stuff recently
Had to really dig through my old drafts for this one, but here!! <3
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Thunder rumbles ominously, and a flash of lightning illuminates the dorms. As Remus listens, he can just make out a whimper from the other side of the room, and oh — Sirius.
Remus walks quietly across the room to Sirius's bed, pulling back the curtains. There's a heap of blankets in the centre of the bed, and Sirius is lying, trembling, underneath them.
Remus places a hand on his back and, almost immediately, Sirius is flinching away from his touch. Remus moves away, nearly tripping over a book as he steps hurriedly back.
Sirius is already back on his feet, looking cautiously at Remus. "Sorry," he says quietly. "I didn't..."
"You don't have anything to be sorry for."
Sirius nods, slowly taking a seat back on his bed. Lightning flashes once more, and he tenses.
"Can I hug you?" Remus asks. He walks around the bed to Sirius, and sits beside him.
Immediately, Sirius pushes his head into Remus's chest, and Remus wraps his arms around him. A few moments pass in silence, before Remus eventually speaks again. "Do you want me to stay?"
Sirius nods again.
"Alright." Remus manoeuvred them so that they were lying down, Sirius's back to his chest. "Try to get some sleep, okay? I'll be right here."
#only for you robl#(i mean i'd probably write something for theory as well but that's not the point)#oh god what the fuck tags do i use#it's been so long since i've wrote wolfstar#marauders#wolfstar#remus lupin#sirius black#it's short but today is not a writing day. so.#however i did just write this in like 30 minutes#maybe it is a writing day#i need a tag for you#robl tag#!! :)
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in an unexpected turn of events i'm having to edit down the content in my aubrey monologues so that i can actually fit all four of them in my final performance for my standup class and on the one hand it sucks bc i really love some of the jokes i have to cut but on the other hand someday i'll be able to write more monologues and possibly expand upon this cut material so i can get a whole monologue on a topic that would've just been an aside
#the actual standups in my class who have only ever done a tight five having to stretch their new material to fit the 20 minute final#vs me‚ an extremely extra fag who's used to writing full-length scripts‚ realizing the 3 monologues i've timed already add up to 20 min#and i'm working on a fourth one that works better as an opener than any of the existing pieces so it has to get in#(it'll be short tho i'm making sure of it. it's just like ''here's some material about aubrey's relationship to zir mom!'')#(then immediate segue into the uncle reg bit)#got the catcalling monologue down to 5 minutes and 30 seconds when the first draft was nine minutes#(tbh i'm fine with most of those cuts i think they were mostly filler)#(there's a bit about androgyny that i liked that i cut but tbh it doesn't work as just one paragraph it needs more nuance)#the uncle reg monologue is having the ''dumped at the pride parade'' thing trimmed down which is funny bc that was the original premise#tbh i could probably stretch my toronto pride material ft. uncle reg to a full 20 minutes bc the first stream of consciousness was so long#i wrote it right after i myself got back from toronto pride and tbh i actually wrote it as the outline for a sitcom episode#so the monologue version is very reduced down bc there were so many details that didn't fit in#and i'm realizing the material about the person who dumped aubrey should be its own monologue that i'll do another time#and maybe even add in the rest of the sitcom-style story at some point bc tbh that's some of my favorite aubrey material i've come up with#and the cishetman monologue is getting the intro part about facetime trimmed a bit bc it meanders#and the ''sugar and spice and everything nice'' joke is being cut even tho i like it bc i actually have a ton more material in my notebook#that's just me riffing on how weird those expressions are. and the material isn't polished but i could make it something later#the song isn't being trimmed bc it has a very specific run time and imo is the strongest. so that's my closer#anyway thank you to everyone reading my aubrey updates i'll be sure to post the final 20-minute-special on youtube#and i hope i get to do more monologues soon so i can put the other ideas mentioned here (as well as some i haven't) out into the world
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a handful of chinese songs that give me big robit energy
translating cpop songs is like my second favourite hobby so it's frankly surprising I haven't made this post sooner
Him - Floruitshow (马 - 福禄寿)
I've talked about this song on here before but this is the 3.7 song for me
the second chorus is definitely MR-SN but i like to think of the first chorus (Let me take a good look at your visage as we count down the time till the curtains’ close. Forgive me for holding back my voice so soon, do you know, in your graceful escape, all I see around me is disaster?) as VR-LA during the flashback sequence
specifically 'all I see around me is disaster' because yeah not wrong
'This time I’m not here to bring you home' just kills me like the please please take care of yourself because I can't be there with you anymore of it all
'Oh spring, oh warm sun, please come sooner, grant him a smooth and safe journey' same point, just the desperate plea for the universe to protect VR-LA because he can't do it himself anymore
How can I make you stay - Floruitshow (我用什么把你留住 - 福禄寿)
(conveniently I have actually done a full translation of this song!)
definitely one of the Maxim songs of all time
"You’ve believed that you can let your life pass in numbness, but [...] why do your tears fall in the moment of letting go?' YEAH because we've seen so many times how Maxim keeps trying to convince himself that he can stop just caring but it never works
'You say don’t fall in love, yet you’re unwilling to let go' same point, this man is in such denial about how he just can't stop caring
specifically the second verse feels a lot like Maxim waiting for VR-LA to return from Tu'narath
'You stay silent, holding onto starlight as you wait through your darkest hour. Your mind is struck, when familiar murmurs pierce your ears once more' aaaAAAAHH
the bridge (?) as a conversation between VR-LA and Maxim, VR-LA inviting Maxim to see the beauty and wonders of the world ('Do you want to see the sea of flowers blooming?', very 4.5 wedding invite honestly) but Maxim's trauma just would not allow him to take that risk ('If none of them come back, then who should I live for?')
fun fact the second version of the bridge in my translation ('You must stay to see the flowers bloom' onwards) is exclusive to that live performance of the song so it's not in the spotify version i linked here. as for which version you think fits Maxim more.. well.
Borrow - Mao Buyi (借 - 毛不易)
finally banging out a translation for this song was kinda the inspiration for me to make this post actually
the tldr of this song is that it's an unnamed/unidentified speaker asking to borrow various small things for the sake of somebody else (like 'an inch of frozen sunlight' to provide warmth in a cold world) so you can probably see where i'm going with this
'A simple ‘we have plenty of time’ etched into the soul to prepare for the chance of forced separation' ouch ow okay
'Those blown apart by these winds will say that they never loved deeply' / 'There is a sincerity that cannot be blown apart by this wind' DX-TR betraying the old crew vs VR-LA fighting through so much just to get them back
'There are tears that cannot be washed away by this rain' this line just haunts me. like in general
'An acre of land for him to call home, an ordinary life for him to live' as MR-SN watching over the old crew like I can't be there for you but I hope you will find peace and a home...
#rolling with difficulty#rwd starship#rwd professionals#my feel good hobby! as opposed to art: my feel bad hobby /j#im actually learning to play how can i make you stay on the guitar right now its a lot of fun but ow my fingers#ive also found a score for him but its super outside my skill level so we'll see how that goes#bmadd11 my beloathed#/also/ working on a little something based on that song but that wont... come into play for at least the next few weeks so#its an absolute monster of a project and school has started so i dont have high hopes for getting it done soon#i dont think i got to mention this on the actual post for borrow but ive literally been spinning that song in my brain since like 2020#genuinely. i've been thinking about how to translate that song for upwards of 3 years#grammar is just weird sometimes#i was gonna include let's go wandering by bibi zhou but i couldve SWORN i wrote a translation for that song before i just cant FIND it#spent 30 minutes hunting for the doc in my drive thats 30 minutes of my life wasted#but 'lets go wandering with a smile because we carry our home in our hearts' just fucks severely#also considered including forget your sorrows when the flowers bloom by zhou shen#bc im not gonna make a cpop post and *not* try and subject more poeple to zhou shen#but like that songs vibe is too... cottagecore to really make a good point there im just obsessed with one specific line#'If my memories are stolen and I forget all my love; I'll say to you “Hello!”#post amnesia vrla to the old crew??? the 'i dont know you. id love to get to know you again' of it all????#did this instead of my programming homework :|
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Against my better judgement I’ve acquired two new books from Ollie’s: Coriolanus by William Shakespeare and Empire Games by Charles Stross (which I didn’t know was a series when I got it lol whoopsie… I usually don’t read series; but this is classic-style dystopian sci-fi with time travel so it’s a little different).
#I’m a little over halfway through Time Jump by John Brunner and the consumer report parts get me every time 😂#He has normal short stories in there; interrupted by consumer reports on time machines and wishing machines#The whole thing is basically one extremely well-executed and beautifully written shitpost. Top-tier.#About every ten to twenty minutes I’m doubled over with laughter over something this guy wrote#I had no idea it was a comedy going into it but holy shit it’s wonderful#The longer you keep reading certain parts the funnier it gets because he has such a dry and pedantic voice#but he’s describing the most outrageous events in that dry and pedantic voice#I’ve had to put the book down on numerous occasions because I was laughing too hard to continue#I am not to be trusted at Ollie’s. I always forget about the giant book section and I get lost in there for 20–30 minutes#I found Beautiful Oops and Midnight at the Tuscany Hotel there#and also a calligraphy book and a bread book and a soup book when I was younger#I’ve been hoarding books since I was a little kid#I like carrying them around the house with me#I don’t even read them half the time; I just like to hold them and reading interferes with holding them#They have The Fox comics there but I don’t dare get those with either of my parents present#because they’re quite gory#I hate the stickers so much though. You can never get them completely off
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What if I just don't sleep. What then.
#it is 11:01 and i just finished taking a shower that was supposed to have been taken at 9:30#look. unless someone (steve usually) forces me to go to bed i will not despite knowing i will be complaining the entire day#“im soooi tiiiiired” well maybe its cause you only slept 6 hours you fucking microwave oven#ik its recommended for teens to get about 10 hours of sleep but if the school system wanted me to be healthy they should not make an entire-#-essay due in three days and maybe consider letting kids have more than 10 days absent or even not starting the day at 8 am what about that#huh??? huh??? wisconsin school system i have a complaint to make#see i get 6 hours of sleep. 7 hours at school. that leaves me 11 hours for personal stuff and a good four of those are spent eating and-#-doing chores and talking to family etc etc. so i get about 7 hours to myself add in showering homework and laying on the floor sobbing#and ive got like 5 and a half hours of free time so excuse me if i like to. yk. do thingsand maybe im not getting the recommended 10 hours#- of sleep.#im regan thank you for coming to my speech i wrote it in 10 minutes it is now 11:12 goodnight of youre going to bed if not?#join me in being a fucking goddamn disaster all the time :)
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