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secretpeaches · 10 months

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solo trip, part three

part one, part two, part four

idol bang chan x gn!reader

words: 5.75k

warnings: alcohol consumption (assuming reader is 18+), some cursing, a bit of angst but ends sweet, still pining LOL

summary: strangers to friends to more than friends. reader finds out their partner cheated on them while traveling alone, chan helps them forget.

note: this one is even longer than the last one…i am so sorry LMAO thank u everyone again for reading my stuff (': i still have more parts planned so look out for those (i guess i can do a tag list anyone would like). i also have more ideas for other members, which will come after this! im always open to suggestions as well <3 thank u thank u thank u

—

chan returned to what he thought was an empty dorm. since his group had nothing scheduled for the day, jisung, changbin, and hyunjin should be out right now, or at least that's what they claimed in the morning.

he wanted to just collapse on his bed and replay everything that just happened with you in his mind. his heart was still beating 100 miles a minute inside his chest. sliding off his shoes, he quickly locked the door behind him, about to make a beeline for his room.

"hey, chan."

chan jumped at the sudden voice calling his name in the emptiness of the dorm. it was jisung.

he exhaled, a hand on his chest. "you scared me, man-"

"what happened yesterday?” jisung said matter of factly. he stood in front of his older friend, hands in his pockets, and looking him directly in his eyes.

chan was even more startled by the sudden question, directly calling him out. he had never seen him so serious.

“what are you talking about?”

“last night. you were acting weird. something happened and i want to know what.”

there was a long silence. jisung was onto him, there was no way to hide it. he couldn’t lie to him now that he was standing right in front of him, eyes glaring into his soul.

so he spilled. he told everything that happened between him and you, starting from the previous night under the bridge, to your meeting outside the cafe, to the selfie you sent not even half an hour ago. he didn't forget to leave out that you had no idea of his idol status as well, and were leaving the country in just two days. jisung listened intently to every word. he was relieved it wasn’t anything serious but at the same time, he knew that chan had dug himself into a hole he wasn’t going to be able to pull himself out of.

“i don't know what to do.” the two had moved to the couch, chan burying his face in his hands and resting his elbows on his knees. “i know it's only been one day but… ah.” he couldn’t finish the sentence, shaking his head and opting for a different choice of words. “i’m going crazy. i really don't know what to do.”

“hey, it could be alot worse.” jisung chuckled, trying to offer a smile to diffuse the tension.

“no, i think this is the worst it can get.” he talked through his hands. “they invited me out tonight. like, to a club or something.”

“i- they what?”

chan remained silent.

“you said no, right?”

no answer.

“you know how impossible that is, right? like, actually no way it can happen.”

still no answer.

“chan, what if you get caught?”

“i won’t get caught.” he finally spoke, looking jisung in his eyes and shutting him up.

there was another long silence as chan turned his head to look forward with a deep sigh, his mind filled with only you. from your hair, to your eyes, to your smile, basking in the memory that was burned into his mind only an hour ago. he didn’t want to forget a single second of it. he just wanted to relive that feeling he had with you again. it felt exactly like a movie, the big drop on a roller coaster, the burst of fireworks that you feel in your chest.

“i’ve never felt like this. ever.” his eyes dropped to his hands in his lap. suddenly, the barrier of denial he was holding against himself was breaking. it was more than just your features in his mind now. he thought of the way you told your stories, your little jokes that were easy for him to bounce off of, your flustered expression when your face made direct contact with his chest, the electricity when your hand touched the bare skin of his arm. he had no idea that the person he stopped would have such an effect on him. he had no idea that stopping you, a complete stranger then, would lead to this. he thought he was just being polite, and then he thought he was just making a new friend, but now he realized the feelings were stronger than just that. maybe it was just a crush, but it felt real.

“i like them, jisung.” his gaze remained on his hands that he was wishing were holding yours. he tried to picture what your hands looked like, and how they would look intertwined with his. “i don’t care if we just met. and i don’t care if i get caught.”

“wow,” jisung was speechless at the confession. never in his years of knowing bang chan had he ever see him act this way. “you’re serious about this."

once again, chan remained silent, lost in thought.

“you know you have to tell them right? about you- this-” he gestured to their surroundings. “about stray kids. if you don’t tell them, they’ll find out eventually. they’ll see your face on a poster outside or something.”

“i know, don’t remind me.”

this time, jisung was the one to sigh. he felt bad for his group’s leader, and he hated seeing him so torn up. jisung rested a hand on his shoulder, leaning forward to try and find his eyes. it’s not like he didn’t want him to be happy, he just didn’t want him to get hurt. but if this is what chan wanted, he would support him no matter what.

"what are you going to do?”

“i’m going to go out tonight. they invited me and i said yes, so…i'm going. i’ll make it work." he stood, facing jisung who was still sitting. “they leave in two days, so i have to do this no matter what.”

—

you felt like your mind was on another planet when you returned to your friends, instantly telling them everything. it was kind of amazing how chan was able to make you feel like nothing could go wrong for the rest of your day. forget anything that happened with anybody prior, he was the positivity you needed to keep you going on this trip. it was a shame you had to part ways, but at least you would be seeing him later. and later couldn’t come soon enough.

you hung out with your friends for most of the afternoon, returning to your respective places of stay when the sun started to show signs of setting. the plan was to meet up in a few hours to go clubbing, something you hadn't done yet on your trip that you were really looking forward to. it was saturday, so any club in seoul will be packed. your friends were just as excited as you were about chan agreeing to join you. even when you expressed how nervous you were about meeting him again, they ensured it would be okay, and that this would be good for you.

after the selfie you sent chan hours ago, he had only replied "see you later (:" and nothing else since then. you thought of texting him again all day but once again were held back by the thought of coming off too clingy or bothering him. so you just kept yourself busy all day with your friends and told yourself you would text him again closer to the time you were meeting up.

that task proved to be extremely difficult, the memory of you slamming into him outside the cafe popping up in your mind every so often, making you blush each time. the more you thought about it, the more embarrassing you realized all of that was, each time picking a new detail to kick yourself over. yet, chan was still so kind, jumping to help you just like the first time you met. he was just…warm. his personality that is. for a second your mind wandered to the warmth of his body when your face made contact with his chest, but you quickly shoved those thoughts away.

as you got ready in your hotel room, you paced around, anxiously going back and forth on outfits and hairstyles. this wasn't a date, so why were you so nervous? this wasn't a date, right? no, you were just meeting up with your friends as a group, he's just tagging along.

"is he going to like this?" "is this too much?" you kept asking yourself out loud, obviously with no one there to answer. you weren't the type to send pictures of your outfit to your friends for approval, but you almost wanted to send something to chan to see what he would say. you ultimately decided to just let it be a surprise.

you picked up your phone to send him the details of the meetup location, but noticed a new text in a different conversation. not just one- 20. it was your ex.

your entire body froze in place, mid walk to the bathroom. after everything that happened over the past 24 hours, you had somewhat forgotten about them and what they did to you. the parts of your brain that were filled with sadness and hurt had been replaced with excitement and butterflies. even then, just seeing your ex’s name made you want to throw up.

“no.” you thought aloud, firmly reminding yourself. “not now. you need to keep getting ready.” you quickly texted chan as you originally intended, and turned off your phone before you made any bad decisions, setting it aside to continue your routine. you thought that ignoring your ex might come back to bite you later, but at this point you really didn’t care. you had the whole night ahead of you that you had been looking forward to, and you would not let them ruin it.

you finished up getting ready, making sure your hair and outfit were to your liking, giving yourself once last glance in the bathroom mirror, before grabbing your belongings and heading out.

you: i’m on my way!

chan had been getting ready himself with the help of jisung. he made him promise not to tell the other members about everything, despite jisung's complaining (he wanted to gossip a little bit). jisung did everything he could to help chan and offer him positive advice despite his constant uncertainty "don't worry chan, just have fun! seriously! don't be too hard on yourself."

he had already left the dorm when his phone buzzed with your text. thankfully, the meetup spot wasn't too far, and it was already pretty late. it would be easier for him to silently slip out of the dorm at this time of night as well without being noticed by anyone.

chan: ill be there soon!

chan: are you walking there?

chan: are you by yourself?

chan: its late, i can walk with you

you rolled your eyes at the string of texts. there he went again with his kindness.

you: okay dad

chan had to bite his lip to prevent himself from laughing out loud.

you: ill be okay, it's not that far

"hey! hello!" one of your friends called out to you while your head was still peering down at your phone. you didn’t realize you were already at your destination. "earth to y/n!"

"oh, hey!" you smiled at them, but before you could say another word, they grabbed your wrist, pulling you towards the glitzy club ahead of you. music and cheering poured out of the open windows and doors. it was a little daunting from the outside, but the closer you got to the entrance, the more the noise drowned out your own noise in your head.

"you look amazing! lets go in! i'm so excited!"

"wait- i have to wait for chan, i told him i would meet him outside"

"right, right,” your friend gave you a weird look, with a smirk and an eyebrow raised. “you can find us inside then, right?"

you nodded, and as you were about to verbally agree, your phone started ringing from where you held it in your hand.

“oh that’s probably him, right? i’ll leave you to it.” before you could confirm their statement, your friend slipped away back to the crowd of the club. you had assumed they were right, thinking chan was probably calling you to ask where you were. you quickly moved away from the loud club entrance to a quieter spot a few strides away, but when you looked at your phone, instead was your ex’s name and picture enlarged on the screen.

you couldn’t move, and you felt the sick rising again. you just stared at your phone, waiting for the vibrating to stop and the name to disappear. you thought that your message from this morning would be enough to make them leave you alone for the rest of your trip, until you inevitably had to face them back at home, but apparently not. you wanted to breathe a sigh of relief when the name went away, but it reappeared just as soon as it had disappeared, telling you that they were calling back and that they would keep doing so. this couldn’t be happening right now. were they just going to keep calling you? should you answer? your mind became clouded with questions upon questions, and all the emotions you had buried were starting to flood back. you wanted to leave, run back to your hotel, and just ignore everything. the noise from the busy club next to you mingled with your thoughts and completely overwhelmed you. maybe going to a club was a bad idea.

“y/n!” hearing your own name pulled you back to reality, forcing you out of your intrusive thoughts. to the rest of the world, you were just standing there, spacing out at your phone screen. to anybody else, you probably didn’t seem like something happened.

when your eyes lifted from your phone, you saw chan walking up to you, giving you a shy wave. pretending nothing happened, you quickly shoved your phone into your bag, even though it was still buzzing. suddenly, all your concerns evaporated and everything around you muffled. it was just you and him.

this was really happening.

“hey!” you smiled, chan now standing directly in front of you. he was wearing all black, combining a sleek black button up with black jeans and black shoes. a silver chain hung from the loops on his jeans, and the top two buttons were open on his shirt, implying he chose to drop a few buttons to reveal his chest. a small earring hung from each of his ears, matching a silver necklace. the silver reflected the lights of the club next to you. this look was quite the contrast to the chan you had seen in your past two interactions. before he was in hoodies and tshirts and sweatpants, but now he was clearly putting in effort. was that just for you?

his face, however, was still covered by a black mask, and his hair still hidden underneath a black hat. you were a little disappointed, thinking now would be your chance to see his face, but you had to respect his decision. even without showing his face, the outfit looked amazing on him, and complemented all his features perfectly.

upon seeing you, chan had to restrain himself from gasping out loud. your appearance was breathtaking. for him, this was also a look from you that he wasn’t expecting. you had both seen each other before in a natural setting, both dressing comfortably, but now that your meeting was intentional, way more effort was put in on both sides. the fact you were meeting at a club also contributed to your outfit choices. chan couldn’t help but let his eyes take note of each part of you and your beautiful, and somewhat sexy, outfit.

“wow, you look really nice.” was all he could manage to say in that moment.

“oh, thank you,” you suddenly felt self-conscious seeing his eyes wander. “so do you.”

for a second, you both found yourself standing there, just existing in each others presence. no words needed to be said. there was a silent agreement between you made only between your shared gaze, lost in the beauty you found in each other. something connected you on a level neither of you could explain. some would say soulmates, but you would never admit that.

whether or not either of you acknowledged it, this was very real.

“let’s just go in, yeah?” chan stated so you both wouldn't be standing there too long. being reunited with you made him completely forget that he needed to be mindful of his surroundings to not get spotted. he had made it this far somehow. he was still crossing his fingers and praying to every god in his mind to not be recognized.

he held his hand open sheepishly for you to take, and you happily fit your fingers between his, letting him pull you inside the bustling crowd.

as you forced yourselves through the mass of people dancing and standing around, you were quickly able to find your friends ordering drinks at the bar. chan politely introduced himself, and without further conversation, shots were being passed amongst your group. chan reluctantly accepted, saying he would only have one. he knew just one would have no effect on him.

you, however, were easily persuaded by your friends, making you believe that getting absolutely shitfaced was the answer to your problems. one shot turned into two, which turned into three. chan was glad you were laughing and having fun, standing close by you with a protective hand on your lower back, but was worried you were drinking too much too quickly. from the moment he pulled you inside, his hand never disconnected from you, whether it was holding your hand, or resting a hand on your shoulder or back. he didn't want to lose to you to the crowd, or to your friends for that matter.

chan was right. you hadn't drank like this in a long time, so even three shots was enough to give you a bit more than a buzz.

before you could accept the fourth shot being offered to you, chan grabbed your hand with his to intercept.

"actually y/n, let's go dance. cmon." before you could protest, he quickly pulled you away from the bar and you could hear your friends cheering behind you.

he pulled you through the mass of people, squeezing around dancing bodies and dodging drinks. he stopped at a break in the crowd big enough for both of you to fit.

once again, you were face to face, chan's hand still holding your own. maybe it was the alcohol, but suddenly the music wasn't so loud and the crowd wasn't so packed. again, it was just you and him.

in any other situation, you would have been lost or anxious, but the few drinks you did have clouded your judgment and made you feel like you had all the confidence in the world. or maybe it was because chan was with you. your heart was pounding with excitement.

you danced to the music, swaying your body to the muffled rhythm, and chan followed suit. you closed your eyes, letting your body move on its own. chan watched you, smiling endearingly as you danced, getting lost in the music. you were in your own world, but your happiness was beautiful. when you opened your eyes to look up at him and grin, he wanted to melt right there. he had so many things he wanted to say to you in that moment, but was too stunned by you to speak. you looked amazing, your dancing was amazing, you…were amazing. it was right then and there that he decided, you were the most beautiful person he had ever been given the chance to interact with.

you didn't need to see his face to know he was smiling back down at you as you both danced. even just his aura was beaming. you didn't need to see his smile to know it was gorgeous.

"chan, your-"

before you could finish your thought, someone behind you took a step back too far, bumping you forward into chan. you stumbled, but chan caught you by your waist, exclaiming a “woah” as the two of you were now in each others arms. before you could correct yourself, the crowd pushed closer around you, making it impossible for you to step back to where you stood before.

you were right before. he was warm.

his hands held you securely, making sure you didn't fall. he couldn't help but think you fit perfectly in his hands. he had been longing for this moment deep down, and now it was reality. he didn't think these things happened in real life, let alone a hectic life like his.

"i got you." you heard him say, but you weren't sure if it was spoken or whispered. you were positive he could feel your heart beating in your chest as your bodies were now pressed together.

you looked up at him, hands resting on his chest. for the first time, you could no longer deny how you were feeling. yes, chan was your friend, but you wanted more. you had never felt so connected to someone in your life, as if you were meant to meet. the night before, you said fate didn’t exist, but now you knew that everything you had done in your life had lead up to meeting this stranger under a bridge in a country far from your own. the way he looked down at you in his arms made you think that maybe he felt the same. this was crazy. was the alcohol making you feel this way, was this a rebound from being heartbroken, or was this really how you felt? looking into chans eyes, the way his hands held you close to him made you believe there there was no way chan could ever hurt you. you knew the answer to your own question, finding it in the depth of his dark eyes.

your longing for one another was shared.

“chan. i-”

you were once again interrupted by the buzzing of your phone in your bag, making you jump. it had been buzzing on and off the entire time, but you only noticed it then. you were both broken out of your trance, letting go of each other and attempting to step back.

it was your ex.

you breathed an annoyed sigh at that being the reason such a nice moment had to end. “i’m so sorry, i have to take this call.”

chan caught on to your annoyed expression. “is everything okay?”

“yes, i’ll be right back,” you rested a hand on his arm, giving him a reassuring squeeze. “don’t worry.”

he didn’t believe you, but he let you go anyway.

you slipped away, pushing through the crowd to find the exit. your head was spinning and none of your thoughts made sense, but you had to compose yourself for two seconds so you could get this done. you’d had enough of this constant painful reminder. if your ex was going to keep bothering you, then you were going to have to answer. you didn't have enough time to collect your thoughts or think this decision through, you just wanted to give them a piece of your mind.

outside, you went back to the same quieter spot you had been standing before. you took a deep breath and pressed the green button to answer.

“what, what is it?” you snapped angrily. “can’t you take a hint? i didn't answer, that means i don't want to talk to you.”

“please,” they started, but you knew it would all be excuses. “please just let me apologize, i just want to explain-”

“no.” you cut them off. “you know i don’t give second chances for this shit, and yet you still have the nerve to bother me when i said to leave me alone? do you have any respect for me?” at this point, you were raising your voice. you felt tears brimming your eyes, threatening to spill.

they started to answer but you cut them off again. in your slightly drunken state, you really had no idea what they were saying to you.

“i don’t want to hear it, whatever excuse you’re going to give me, i don’t want to hear it."

“well if you were with me here, then maybe this wouldn’t have happened. and now you’re not even giving me the chance to explain myself, i never knew you were this heartless, y/n.” they were now raising their voice as well. those words hit harder than anything else. it felt like they were slapping you in the face.

“what the hell? how dare you...” you balled your hand into a fist at your side, your voice breaking as you spoke again. the tears were now freely pouring down your cheeks. “how dare you blame me. this has nothing to do with me-”

you argued like this for hours it felt like. in reality, it was only ten minutes that you had left chan inside. he started to worry, knowing that if you weren’t back, that meant something had happened. he forced his way through the crowd to the exit, looking around for you outside. it didn’t take long for him to find you based on your voice, and he knew from the tone that you were upset. as he quickly made his way over to you, he heard you call out a name you had never mentioned, that could only be one person. that one person who could take your happiness away that he was cursing the first time you met. if it was possible for chan to be more angry than you, he was already there and above. he wished that person was really here and not just on the phone, so they could see him protecting you, shielding you from the pain they were causing you. he wanted them to know that he would be better for you then they ever could.

chan snatched the phone from your hand, startling you. “chan, w-what are you-” you could see his eyes burning with anger.

“hey, asshole. leave them alone, yeah?” he said into your phone. “i think you’ve hurt them enough. don't call back." when he pulled your phone from his ear, you could hear your ex frantically saying “wait- what? who is that?” before being cut off by chan slamming the red end call button.

you just stood there, completely taken aback by what just happened. even chan had no idea what he just did. he just acted on impulse, upset himself from hearing your pained voice in your argument.

“i-” you started to speak, but when chan looked at your face, he could see your makeup running with the heavy tears spilling from your eyes. it reminded him of how you looked when he found you before, upset and heartbroken. he felt his own heart shattering inside him.

“i..” you tried to speak again, not even fully sure what you wanted to say. everything was overwhelming. you were still upset because of your ex, but you wanted to thank chan for stepping in. nobody ever did something like that for you in your entire life. taking a step forward, chan quickly took you in his arms, wrapping you up in his warm embrace. with that, you broke, fully sobbing into his shoulder as he held you tightly.

"it's okay," he caressed the back of your head as he held you. "it's okay, i've got you. i'm here."

the tears wouldn't stop. you weren't even sure why you were crying so hard. from frustration, or pain, or sadness? or from the way chan held you, the way he comforted you as you cried into him. all your emotions mixed together into a blurred mess, like mixing colors of paint into a muddled brown puddle. it didn't matter if you were in public, he made you feel safe. you wanted to stay just like that forever.

why did you have to leave in two days?

chan waited for your breathing to slow to a more normal pace before pulling away. he wiped your makeup stained cheeks with his free hand, his other hand still holding your phone.

"better?" he spoke softly, his hand that just wiped your tears now resting on your shoulder.

you shook your head.

"no?"

"my head hurts." it didn't just hurt. it was pounding, splitting, and still spinning. probably from the combination of sobbing and drinking one too many shots too fast.

"let’s just go,” he stated, his hand finding yours. “i’ll take you back to your hotel so you can get cleaned up. it’s pretty late anyway.”

you nodded, eyes down at your feet. you sniffled, afraid your nose might be running.

“chan?” your voice was hoarse from yelling and crying.

"hm?"

“thank you."

“for what?”

“everything.”

“no, no-” chan breathed a single laugh. “there’s no need to thank me.”

“i mean it!” you slapped him lightly on the arm. “if you hadn’t stepped in, i’d probably still be on the phone out here arguing.”

“no, no, it’s nothing, really-”

“if i hadn’t met you,” you gulped. you couldn’t stop yourself from speaking your thoughts, still a bit of alcohol in you blocking your filter. “if i hadn’t met you, i’d be all alone out here. i truly mean it. thank you, chan.” you finally met his eyes, and gave him a very small smile.

he was surprised by your choice of words. if you hadn’t met him… something about the way you said that gave him a new kind of butterflies feeling he hadn’t experienced yet.

“ah- of course, y/n, of course.” he was blushing, he squeezed your hand where he held it. “i wouldn’t let you be stranded. never in a million years.”

you felt his words, you knew he meant that with everything in him.

“let’s get going.” he started to walk, his hand still holding yours. he didn’t want to let you go, and you didn’t want him to let go either. he held your phone up with his other hand, showing it to you briefly before shoving it into his pocket. “and i’ll be holding on to this, just in case.”

—

you both walked back to your hotel together, never letting go of each others hand. even if your feelings weren’t admitted to each other yet, there was still comfort in just holding each other’s hand. it didn’t matter what people around you thought.

chan was firm on his stance. at this point, he really didn’t care if he got caught. of course he didn’t want to, and he didn’t want either of you to get in trouble, but he couldn’t let this moment go. he was still careful, looking around himself at all times to make sure there were no cameras or phones pointed in his direction, and avoiding all the busy main streets. past midnight in the dark of the side streets near your hotel, there weren't many people around to recognize him anyway.

the closer you got to your hotel, the sleepier you got. after expending so much mental energy, and just having a busy day in general, you were completely exhausted. you didn’t even process that chan was going all the way up to your room with you. in any other circumstance, you’d be freaking out, but you didn’t have enough energy to express it.

in the elevator up to your room, you were almost falling asleep on chan’s shoulder. as much as he didn’t want to, he had to nudge you awake when the doors opened.

you fumbled with your keycard at your door, chan opening it for you instead. he honestly didn’t think he’d go this far but he wanted to make sure you got back safe. this was the longest you had been alone together, and now the two of you were actually alone. there were a million possibilities flying around in his head that he had to force himself not to consider.

chan remained by the door as you shuffled inside.

“will i see you tomorrow?” you asked, facing him.

“i have a lot going on tomorrow,” he answered honestly, pulling your phone from his pocket to return to you. “but i’ll make time, okay?”

“okay.” you gave him a tired smile, letting your fingers brush against his when you took your phone from him. your other hand was still held in his. “i’ll see you then.”

before you could let go of him, he quickly pulled his mask off and lifted your hand to his lips, kissing you once on the top of your hand.

you were speechless, and your stomach completely flipped inside you. the face you were picturing behind the black face mask was now in front of you. he was far more handsome than the picture showed, each detail of his face matching perfectly with the other parts of him. under the bright white lights of your hotel room, you were noticing new details about him unknown to you in the dark of the nightclub. your entire face burned red, from your neck to your ears, and you noticed even his face was tinted pink. was he embarrassed by his own action? his dark hair curled slightly from where it peeked out from his hat. his lips were kind of shaped like a heart, and when your hand returned to your side, you noticed a dimple on each side of his cheek when he smiled at you. his smile was absolutely stunning. you could tell leaving you with a kiss on your hand was fully intentional, just like the extra button open on his shirt that you made note of before. he was definitely the most attractive man you had ever met, and somehow you were lucky enough to call him your friend. not only was he beautiful, but he was so unbelievably sweet as well.

seeing him in that moment, everything made sense. all the pieces of your feelings connected at once, and you were suddenly completely sober with the realization. no, friends wasn’t enough. you liked him way more than that. on a level that you felt deep, deep inside you. your heart longed for something more.

“i’ll see you tomorrow, y/n.”

#im more nervous to post this than the last one #idk how to end it so i just did that #i hope thats okay #bang chan x reader #bang chan scenarios #bang chan fanfic #stray kids scenarios #stray kids fanfic #stray kids fanfics #stray kids au #stray kids #bang chan

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