TW: paranoia, homicidal thoughts, aggressive thoughts

Something I feel isn't talked about enough is the guilt.

I feel so guilty.

I'm sorry I don't trust you, I know you're my sister, I know you're my family, I know you're my soulmate, I know you're my best friend. I don't trust you. I can't. And I'm sorry for it.

I'm sorry I scared you, I'm sorry I can't listen to you, I'm sorry I annoy you, I'm sorry I took your time.

And it's more than that.

How do you deal with the guilt of homicidal/agressive thoughts ? How can you ever forgive me ? How will I ever forgive myself ?

I get so paranoid in the street I scream in my head "come close to me and I'll punch you, I'll make you pay, I'll make sure you can't walk again" and is the fact that I am terrified an excuse ? Is it a good enough excuse ? Is it forgivable ?

How can I ever look people in the eye when I daydreamt I unalived them ? What if they knew ? What would they do ? Would they make me pay ?

I am a mess and I am guilty and I am scared which makes me enraged which makes me even more guilty which makes me even more scared and it's never ending but how could it ever end ?

No one who hasn't had thoughts like this will ever understand. I know how they'd look at me if they knew. I look at myself the same way.

Sorry for the vent.

a mirror wip, to go with my mirror rant from last night. So close...

mirrors >:c

I hate any school assignment or thing that has to do with myself since I know nothing of myself, don’t want to know anything about myself and don’t want to speak about myself.

I can’t even lie because I don’t know how to lie about myself really and I can’t even think about doing it.

same with self portraits, reflections. I hate self portraits I hate mirrors and looking at my face and body.

I wish I was born faceless. I can’t stand looking in the mirror and knowing that thing on it is me. that I am that and I hate it.

I fucking hate mirrors like why do I look like that? Why is my face shaped like that? Why is my hair too flat on that side and has too much volume on that side? When did that pimple get there?

My spectrophobia is worse than I thought 😭😭

So when taissa sees that guy that steals eyes in the mirror when she’s a child?

Worst thing I have ever witnessed

The girls are here!!!

I HATE MIRROR MIRROR IM GOIGN TO FROW UP

telling myself my legs r good and strong and let me do amazing things so I don’t cry at training

it's so heartbreaking how in the first season shiv is pretending so hard that she's uninterested in being a part of the company and that she has her OWN Good Liberal Agenda and her OWN desires and beliefs and her OWN ways to get power and success and no tom don't worry I don't even want it!!! ofc she wants it more than anything in the world but she knows that to express desire is to be vulnerable to humiliation. but then that OLD CUNT coaxes her out of her shell and makes her believe she has a chance only to humiliate her over and over again and make her entire life about him because he can't stand for any of his kids not to be obsessed with him. "I've managed to get myself into this situation where what does my dad think is my entire fucking universe." sarah snook emmy logan roy kys 1000 times

🚨 ATENTION 🚨 WEE WOO WEE WOO 🚨 NEW POSUKA ART FOR RAY’S BIRTHDAY 🚨

GOD BLESS THIS BEAUTIFUL DAY. HAPPY BIRTHDAY RAY!!!!!!! 💜💜💜

Link to Posuka’s Twitter post with the art

i drew a second outfit design for sumi wayyyy back so now i've decided to redraw it and make it better! and also, i chopped her hair off! now THATS what i call character development

favorite bits from the terror screenplay, 20/20

"Still trying to intimidate me? Cute."

(ID: Kirby series fanart of Meta Knight and Galacta Knight based off of a couple dynamics template by @/ReddsMess on Twitter. Original template and source below the cut, as well as a HAL language variant. Top-left panel - high-angle shot of MK lit from above, standing firm and glaring up through his mask, his wings curled out and breaching the panel in places, subtitled "Well well..." Top-right panel - low-angle shot of GK lit from below, looming in the air and leering down through his mask, his wings curled out and his hands spread wide in challenge, both of which breach the panel in places, subtitled "Look who came to see me..." Bottom panel - MK & GK stand next to each other, the latter leaning towards the former and gently caressing the side of his mask with the back of one hand, grinning smugly and wrapping a wing around the knight, subtitled "My Knightmare." MK stands stiffly with his fists clenched at his sides, blushing vividly and glaring away from the warrior. A little flurry of white hearts emanate from GK, while one small one hovers above MK. END ID.)

Started 03/30/24, finished 04/02/24.

---

HAL language variant:

Original by ReddsMess (template link) NOTE: The artist has marked 16-18+ in their bio, so browse at your own risk!

Do you ever think about the fact that Neil is number 10 while Riko is number 01 and they had polar opposite reactions to being raised in abusive environments?