#i get lorelai wanted more for her but the fact she wants to push rory to do something she doesn't want to do when lost sucks
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#jade rewatches gilmore girls#i hate how lorelai reacts to rory needing a break from yale#her own parents were more understanding of rory dropping out for a bit#richard saw rory fall apart and knew she needed a a break#and loreelai tells rory she's not coming home so ofc she moves into her grandparents house#i get lorelai wanted more for her but the fact she wants to push rory to do something she doesn't want to do when lost sucks#and i hate how she freezes her own kid out for it#like if she'd let rory have a break and move home she could've helped her quicker
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Midnight Rain | J.M.
📝 Title: Midnight Rain
📚 Requested: Yes/No
✍ Summary: The story of how you fell in love with Jess Mariano and how second chances exist
🎶: Midnight Rain by Taylor Swift
💌: my first Jess Mariano fic, hope you guys like it!
You never knew what love truly felt like until Jess Mariano walked into your life.
It was just another typical day, walking into Luke’s diner for your morning dose of caffeine with Rory while her mother went to get a newspaper.
Then there he was, wearing a metallica t-shirt with red long sleeves, bickering with Luke about his choice of outfit for the day.
“Hello?” Rory waved a hand in front of your face with a teasing smile, “Do you want to sit down or are you just going to stand there?”
Clearing your throat, you gave the mystery boy one more glance before you nodded, “Yeah, of course we’re sitting down.”
While Rory placed the order, you pulled out your current read and started where you had left off.
“Emily Dickinson?” A deep voice said as coffee was poured into your cup, “A remarkable poet and woman, or so I’ve heard.”
Looking up, you see the mysterious boy now standing in front of you, “She is. You’ve read her work?”
The boy shrugged, “A little here and there.”
You nodded to the book in your hands, “You can borrow this one if you want, I’m just rereading it anyway.”
“Really?” He asked, a mischievous smile growing on his lips, “You wouldn’t mind?”
“Would I be offering if I did?” You countered.
“Touche.” He chuckled as you handed him the book, “Thanks.”
“You’re Luke’s nephew right?”
“I’d rather be known as Jess. And from what I can deduct, you’re Rory’s friend?”
“I’d rather be known as Y/N.”
–
“Done.” Jess walked in pace with you as you were on your way to the bookstore.
“Done with what?” You asked, making him hand you the Emily Dickinson collection of poems you loaned him three days ago.
“The book.” He answered as you took it from him.
“What’s the verdict then?”
“It was okay, also I did write some thoughts in the margins.”
Flipping open the book, you were met with his neat handwriting filling up all the empty spaces, “Wow. I thought you said you haven’t read it much?”
Jess gave a smile, “What is much anyway?”
“Point taken.” You smiled as he pushed open the door for you.
–
“You seem to be alone today.” Jess noted as he sat in the chair in front of you, “Not here with the rest of your coffee trio?”
You laughed, closing your book to give him your full attention, “Sadly no. Rory is off tolerating Paris since the latter is freaking out over something and Lorelai is attending to something at the inn.”
“Pity.” Jess’ signature mischievous smirk in place, “But on the bright side, I guess I’ll have you all to myself.”
“Oh really?” You giggled.
Before Jess could give his witty remark, Luke could be heard from behind the counter, “Jess, I do not pay you to flirt with the customers!”
“First of all, you don’t pay me at all.” Jess stood up, coffee pot in hand, “Second, I only flirt with this particular customer.”
And before he left your table, he leaned forward and pecked you on the cheek.
You couldn’t control the smile that adorned your lips as the heat crawled its way up to your cheeks.
Oh, but Jess Mariano was far from done, “I’ll pick you up at 8 tomorrow night for our first date?” He calls out as he makes his way to the counter.
Looking over your shoulder, it kept all of your willpower just to stop yourself from laughing at Luke’s rather shocked expression, “Sounds like a perfect plan.”
–
“Fine, laugh all you want but no one else can change my mind on the fact that Romeo and Juliet is a complete scam.” Jess said, stabbing his chocolate ice cream with the small spoon the dessert came with.
You were quiet for a moment as you took a bite off your mint chocolate ice cream, making it seem like you were thinking about what he said, “I know right! Rory refuses to hear a word I say on the matter but how stupid can Romeo be to see that Juliet was breathing?”
“It was a sleeping potion, it would be impossible for her to not breathe.” Jess interjected.
“Yeah, and people have the audacity to call it the greatest love story of all time when the title clearly belongs to ‘The Notebook’.” You said, taking another spoonful of your ice cream.
“Mhm.” He nodded in agreement, “Alie and Noah beat out Romeo and Juliet anyday.”
“You know, you’re adorable whenever you talk about books.” Your boyfriend added.
You swear that your face is 13 shades of red right now, and not because of the summer heat, “So do you.”
“I’m serious.”
“I am too.”
He rolls his eyes with a chuckle, tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear, “Everything you do is adorable. From the way you would practically scrutinize every single bad decision in a tv show to the way you like to smell newly-bought books before putting it away.”
“Oh, so now we’re pointing out my awful quirks?” You teased.
“Lorelai’s sarcasm is now starting to rub off of you.” Jess mused, “Can I kiss you?”
“You better. ‘Cause I’ll be so mad if you don’t.”
–
It was surprising how you didn’t break the door as you ran into the diner.
“Luke, where’s Jess?” You said, hoping that the envelope in your hand wouldn’t be too crumpled with how tight you were holding on to it.
“In the apar-” He didn’t need to finish his statement as you bounded up the stairs faster than anyone has ever done.
“Looks like somebody’s excited.” Lorelai noted with a smile to which Luke just shrugged.
Immediately jumping into his arms once the door opened, it was a surprise how Jess was still able to keep his balance.
“Woah, someone might’ve got a sugar rush today.” Your boyfriend teased as you started to calm down a little.
“My book is getting published!” Finally brandishing the news you wanted to relay, you held out the envelope to him.
“See? I told you, they’d love you!” Jess grinned, taking the letter out and reading it over.
“I mean it’s nothing permanent yet.” You said, smile still intact, “The book still has to go through a round of edits and all, there’s no contract yet but they’re interested!”
In his delight, Jess picked you up and spun you around before pecking a kiss to your lips, “C’mon let’s go out.”
“What for?” You asked, still dizzy yet you weren’t sure if it was from being spun around or being kissed.
“Duh, to celebrate? What else would we go out for?” He then grabbed his coat before pulling you out of the apartment.
–
“Jess, you know it’s not that easy.” You sighed, tired of having to explain this over and over again.
“You’re the one who’s making it complicated.” He argued.
“Jess, the publication firm specifically told me that if I moved out of Stars Hollow then the deal is over. My book won’t get published.” You said, exasperated, “Hence, I cannot move to Philadelphia with you.”
Jess was getting tired of this discussion too, “Then pull it out! I’m going to be writing my book too, then we can look for a publishing firm together.”
“And put my dream on hold?” You gave a humorless chuckle, “Let me think about it, oh wait, the answer is practically obvious - I won’t.”
“So you’re going to choose your dreams over me?”
“Yes Jess, why on earth would you expect me not to?”
“I don’t know because you love me!”
You scoffed, shaking your head in disbelief, “Just because I love you doesn’t mean I’ll compromise my dreams, my future for you.”
“I would’ve done that for you.” Jess countered.
“Then I’m sorry if I can’t say the same.” You could feel your throat tightening with every passing moment, you knew how this would end - and you hated it.
“If that’s the case, then I’m going to Philadelphia with or without you.” He said, packing up the last of his clothes and stuff.
“And I’m not stopping you.” The tears were now freely dripping down your face, like raindrops on a windowsill.
“Fine.” Jess said, not being able to look at you since he hated seeing you cry then without so much as another word he left your apartment, slamming the door on his way out.
–
It’s been years since that fateful day. It took you a while to get over it but as Lorelai said, “Trains barely even wait for you at the station, so why would life?”
Part of you didn’t regret staying in Stars Hollow, you already had 3 published books to date and was now working on your 4th one. But a part of you would always ask the “what-if?”
The other night, you saw Jess on the news - proudly promoting the book he had just published. You had forgiven him, after all the time had passed, but you can’t help and wonder about the life you gave away.
“Oh hey, can you go get some coffee to-go? Mom needs me to save her from another one of Ms. Patty’s set-ups.” Rory said, looking up from her pager.
You nodded, “Yeah sure.”
Personally, you could never tire of the ambience that meets you when you walk into Luke’s diner, it’s hardly changed over the years.
“Hello Y/N, let me guess, a cup of coffee?” Luke greeted you with a smile, thankfully still fond of you despite what had happened with his nephew.
“Three to go actually.” You said, returning the smile.
“I see some things never really change.” A familiar voice, one you had thought that you would never hear again, reached your ears.
There he was, standing by the door in all of his glory, as if he never left.
“Jess.” You said in awe, not noticing that Luke had started tending to other customers - giving you and your old flame some privacy.
“Y/N.” He may have been older, but the same boyish, mischievous smile was there.
Even if you had imagined this day before, every word you had rehearsed was reduced to rubble. You tried to think of something to say, but everything you could ever possibly know in the English language is now gone.
“I see you’re now one of Stars Hollow’s pride and joy.” Jess teased, slowly walking towards you.
“Pride and joy may be a little of an overstatement.” You said, “I see life’s been treating you well too. Loved how you foreshadowed the plot twist.”
Jess sat down on the bar stool nearest to you, “All of your books were simply impeccable.”
Then with a smile, he pulled a book out of his bag, “Though, I must say, your second one is my favorite.”
Your heart sank as you braced yourself for the teasing/mocking you get in a few short minutes.
Jess had started to read the synopsis, “He was a montage. A love potion that works in slow motion. He could hardly be described as sunshine but he wanted it comfortable and stayed the same. She was midnight rain, she wanted that pain, would rather chase that fame and all of her changed. Their love was like a postcard of paradise, picture perfect - a guaranteed happy ending. But is anything in life ever guaranteed?”
You sighed, “Jess-”
“It’s about us isn’t it?” He said, not a trace of any childish humor in his tone.
“If you mean that our relationship served as an inspiration, then yes.” You said.
“Hm.” Jess contemplated, tracing the small picture of you on the jacket cover, “But they had a happy ending.”
You shrugged, “A part of me dreamed of getting that ending.”
“And who says that it's too late for us to have that ending?” He asked, pushing himself off the stool and now standing right in front of you.
You tried not to get your hopes up, “Do you think we could make it work? Pick up where we left it off?”
He reached forward to push the hair out of your eyes, “I mean it won’t always be sunshine and rainbows. We’ll have fights and all but I think that I want to be able to have those fights with you and resolve them with you. Remember when we had that discussion about Romeo and Juliet?”
Furrowing your brows, you didn’t have a clue where this was going, “Yeah?”
“Alie and Noah may be able to beat out Romeo and Juliet anyday, but I never thought that their story was the greatest one.” Jess said.
“Then who’s?” Your heart was beating faster with every passing second as you had a hint on what the answer was.
“Ours.”
“But, what about your life in Philadelphia? What about your publishing firm?”
“I can work remotely, then I’ll just go down to Philadelphia if I have to fix something and all. I lost you once, I can’t bear to lose you again.”
Persistent. One of the many things that made you fall in love with Luke’s nephew in the first place.
Without missing a beat, you grabbed him by the collar of his leather jacket and pressed your lips to his.
“I’m guessing that’s a yes then?”
“Obviously.”
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THOUGHTS WHILE WATCHING GILMORE GIRLS: SEASON 3, EPISODE 3-“Application Anxiety" (Part 2)
bint. / (bɪnt) / noun. offensive, slang a derogatory term for girl, woman.
According to Mr. College Admissions Dork, the following fatal errors will guarantee your REJECTION! From Harvard.
Bad handwriting (how quaint)
Your chosen after school activities are considered boring to Mr.Dork.
You don't have enough after school activities. Not enough means you're not trying hard enough.
You take too many after school activities. Too many means you're trying too hard. As per Mr. Dork, nobody is interested in everything, and if you like too many things you will be !REJECTED!
You submitted your application too early. You are a hopeless idiot if you believed the myth of "Early Admission". Ha ha! Dumb idiot kids!
You're too intense. Hyper intense students will FAIL their admission interview!
Mr. Dork along with his cohort, Mrs Dork, the delightful rays of sunshine they are, seem to find great joy in publicly dragging their own future students, mocking children who dare to dream of Ivy League admission and cover their walls in university paraphernalia, calling them "hungry and immature". These people are assholes. I think Season 1 Spitfire Rory would have pushed these admission dorks right off the stage. QUIPPY!
Rory is wetting her pants and Paris is twitching.
Let's flash back to early season 2, where Rory was contemplating some potential after school activities.
*sparkly flashback music*
The extra cirricular/summer school options visible behind Rory were: Junior life saving, rock climbing, botany, contemporary art, hiking, loom weaving, local geology, role playing (????), field hockey, and Shakespeare. Harvard will be jumping to accept the applicant with a strong Role Playing/Loom Weaving background.
I guess the Asshole is technically not wrong that the school newspaper seems passe* with those options available.
The Dot-Com Bust. How quaint. I'm old enough to remember hearing about it at the time (I was still a teenager) but thanks to GG I decided to do a little research on the topic and learned more about it. Thanks Emily!
The notion that college=guaranteed success? How quaint. And Rory majoring in journalism is the cherry on top of the Quaint Jello. It's okay, she couldn't know.
The brutal and hilarious truth is that Jess (who didn't finish high school but is already a published author and running his own business by 21) and Dean (who ended up working in construction, which tends to pay very well) were more succesful than Rory with her Yale education in the end. In fact, Rory had the nerve to needle Dean in S4 about his construction job when she has an Ivy League education but won't even take a job waiting tables. Hell, it's even implied that Luke is sitting on a lot of money and he didn't go to college (although maybe not the best example, as that might have been an inheritance, I can't remember if it was ever discussed in detail). Hell, pretty much everyone in Stars Hollow didn't go to college and they seem very happy with their little working class lives.
And if Jess didn't dismember Shane and dump her body in the lake she'd have made a good living as a hairstylist or makeup artist. In a later episode this season, Lorelai turns up her nose at the thought of Rory not going to the most elite college and implies that beauty school and community college are beneath Rory. But lemme save that special rant for when that episode comes along.
However, in a few moments, Lorelai does tell Rory, "You HAVE to go to college." I get it, okay. I get what she's doing. She wants Rory to reach for the stars and do better in life than she did, get a good education etc etc. But this notion that attendance at an elite college as the only possible means to achieve success and anything less is just short of failure feels short sighted.
Emily continues: the competition is fierce for admission, every student takes honors classes and works on the student council, a high GPA is not enough anymore, Rory needs to do something to stand out, extra cirriculars, etc, etc, we know, we know.
Emily: Now even celebrities are going to college. I was watching that insipid Kate Hudson and even she talked about going to college. She's going to get in over Rory!
Kate Hudson must have been a big deal in the early 2000s (I vaguely remember it) because they reference her a lot. Almost Famous came out in 2000 and How To Lose a Guy in 10 Days came out in 2003 and she made 11 movies total between 2000-2004. So that tracks. Back on her home planet, AmyShermanPalladino must have picked up an Earth People magazine and read about how Kate Hudson was popular with Earthlings.
Really funny that Emily is more aware of current pop culture than any character under 35. Lorelai's still over here spouting references to Yo Yo and Dingus from 1973 or whatever.
Lorelai: Don't worry about it Mom, Rory's special, she'll get in to Harvard.
Emily: Of course Rory's special. She knows that, I know that, you know that, we all know that.
Years of that "Rory's a special snowflake who can do no wrong" talk is definitely not going to have adult Rory up to her eyeballs in therapy bills.
Rory shows up at Emily's and Lorelai, Rory, and Paris (on the phone) proceed to have a three way simultaneous Nuclear Panic Attack over the Harvard applications.
The next morning at the Gilmore abode, Lane is visting and fielding phone calls about her rock band personal ad. Still no Rygalski.
If that's what you want.
A SMALL CHILD IN STARS HOLLOW! HOW DID IT BREACH CONTAINMENT!
This dapper gentleman addresses Luke as "Sir" , orders an "Egg cream" and offers to pay for his meal (so he's definitely an outsider). Another child and then a manchild (Kirk) followup with requests for other malt-shop items that nobody has ever ordered outside of a 1950's Archie comic.
,...
Waaaaait a minuuuute. I know what's happening.
These children are Taylor's operatives sent to scope out Luke's Diner. The "Taylor Opens an Ice Cream Parlor Next Door" plot will soon have liftoff.
Between telling a small child to go to hell and insulting Dean to his face for no other reason than he felt like it, I could not love Luke more in this episode.
Things googled while watching gilmore girls:
*Passe (I definitely think I used this word incorrectly).
Bint
Common extra cirricular activities
Dot com bubble burst
Kate Hudson IMDB
How To Lose A Guy in 10 Days
Almost Famous
#gilmore girls#denise rewatches gilmore girls#application anxiety#gilmore girls season 3#luke danes#rory gilmore#lorelai gilmore#paris geller#PariMore
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what's the difference between julie and tami's relationship vs rory and lorelai's. What makes tami the better mother?
what's the difference between julie and tami's relationship vs rory and lorelai's.
Boundaries.
So, in the post that probably initiated this ask, I said this:
while Lorelai had her moments, like telling Rory she was treating Dean like dirt and then telling Rory she was wrong for sleeping with Dean when he was married and then telling her she was wrong for dropping out of Yale, for the most part I didn’t think the show really portrayed Lorelai as a mom at all. Like even when they talk about Rory growing up, it’s like Rory raised herself, she came out as this booksmart, curious kid and Lorelai just happened to luck out because what do we really know of how Lorelai actually shaped Rory as a person?
and I stand by that
although after the rewatch I did a couple of years ago, I will say we do see more moments than mentioned where Lorelai pushes Rory like when she encourages Rory to go to the formal because she doesn't want her to miss out on experiences simply because she's scared or during the Dean break up where she tells her it's OK to just wallow in how she's feeling and later on, when she says she doesn't want Rory to be closed off to love. Fine. But.
Boundaries are still an issue.
So to reiterate ... this is interesting as someone who doesn't like Julie as an individual character but Tami is understanding, she's gracious, she's communicative, she can concede things, admit when she's wrong
but she is a parent and reacts to Julie like a parent
as opposed to
she is interested in having an open relationship with her daughter, she is interested in having a relationship in which Julie will be able to come to her and talk to her
she specifically tells Eric that she will not be her own mother, she says that a daughter is entitled to an open relationship with her mother
but she is not saying this
and that's a healthy boundary to have.
Julie doesn't have to take off from school and comfort her mother over a breakup; she doesn't have to tell someone to stay away from her mother because she's worried about how Tami acts around them; Tami isn't encouraging behaviour like devil egging a seventeen year old boy's car because she doesn't like him. Tami definitely has to contend with judging other characters on the show when it comes to hanging out with Julie i.e. Tyra, although that's presented imo as a very typical parent doesn't want their kid to hang out with a 'bad influence' and not what Lorelai does and Tyra and Tami end up having their own relationship, which... not that Lorelai had to with Jess tbh, but again she's an adult and he's a kid, and she did the same thing to Dean the first time he and Rory broke up.
Like, we're keeping in mind here that the whole premise of Gilmore Girls is a romanticized "what if your mother was your best friend?" notion and FNL is a more grounded, slice of life drama which means that Tami and Julie are more organic in my opinion. Even when we're supposed to see how close Rory and Lorelai are when she tells her that she's considering sleeping with Jess despite the fact that Lorelai has extreme reservations around it, that moment isn't really anything, it's just Lorelai saying we're doing this and they eat, and put their hands on each other's backs and that's a sweet moment, sure, but it's also kind of perfunctory whereas when Tami and Julie have their sex talk, we actually see how uncomfortable it can be, how Julie can be seemingly dismissive, how she gets serious when she sees how intent Tami is and we see that actually have an effect on her
and because we actually see times where Tami struggles with Julie during her rebellious era
it has a more emotional and realistic impact when even during this time, Julie can cry with Tami or talk to Tami because of a relationship that Tami makes sure to have had established with her, which is we can open
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Warning. I''m about to be critical of Rory Gilmore. Specifically about the affair with Dean.
First, lets get this out of the way. Dean is completely at fault for cheating on Lindsay. That goes without question. No one has ever tried to defend Dean in any way. However, people have defended Rory.
When the show first aired, the general justification was that Rory didn't take vows, so she had no obligation to respect Dean's marriage. I admit I was flabbergasted reading multiple posts like this. I mean, obviously people feel that way or no one would sleep with someone married. But, I always assumed it was a something only a small number of people sleeping with a married person truly believed. Others would tell themselves that to justify what they knew was wrong. And others outside the situation would all agree that hurting an innocent party is wrong. No certificate or vows necessary. But, it seemed people honestly felt Rory was completely in her right to sleep with Dean because she wasn't the married one.
Skip ahead to now. The reasoning isn't that Rory doesn't have to worry about Dean being married. It's that Rory had no idea that Dean was still married. That she thought it was over and he was free to be with her. I don't accept that. Did Dean imply that he and Lindsay were in agreement that the marriage was emotionally over (which is a different thing from being legally over)? Yes, so we can blame him for that. But, I don't think Rory really felt that meant Dean was no longer married. I mean, look at her argument with Lorelai. Yes, she says that it's over, but when Lorelai pushes, Rory doesn't answer that he told her that it was something that both he and Lindsay are on the same page. She admits they didn't discuss the details. Probably because neither one of them wanted to discuss it. And they had time. It's not like they were frantically tearing clothes off and moving so fast she couldn't catch her breath to ask a few probing questions. Like "So,you're getting divorced?" If she had asked and he had said yes, I'd be more inclined to say Rory was innocent in this. Also, take her other justifications. Lindsay isn't right for him. (implication, Rory is) That he's not a married guy. But, not because a divorce or even separation are in the works, but because "he's Dean. My Dean" which overrides his marriage. Again, we see this in her saying "he was my boyfriend first!" She slept with Dean because she felt her teenage relationship with him took precedence over his marriage.
Rory wanted to sleep with Dean. But, I don't think she could have done it and admit to herself that his marriage didn't matter to her. She wouldn't have gone to him or instigated anything, but since he came to her, well, he was her boyfriend first. But, she couldn't risk going any deeper with her questioning and keep her from hiding from herself the fact that she was sleeping with a married man .
Also, I have to step back and look at it from a writing perspective. They could have played it very differently. They could have had Rory tell Lorelai that Dean was leaving Lindsay. And when pressed she could have said that he said it was over so that must be what he meant. Or even just repeat him saying that both he and Lindsay felt that it was over. They could have played it as Lorelai being sympathetic and sad that Rory's first time came from being tricked. They could even still have their fight only this time it would be because Rory was mad at Lorelai for disparaging Dean's integrity. But, it's pretty clear that they were not writing a naive girl who had no idea of the situation.
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I think it's interesting that in season 4 we get one (1) appearance from Dean at the beginning of the season (the episode where he gets married) and although it's clearly not a good idea and he's moping over Rory, he pretty much drops out of the narrative completely and we don't see him again for ten episodes. There's a lot going on in Stars Hollow at that time: Lorelai and Sookie are getting the inn put together, Lane starts working for Luke and has a falling out with her mother, Sookie gives birth, there's the Festival of Living Art, Luke and Lorelai "break the bells", and of course Liz and Jess show up at the Firelight Festival and cause a lot of drama. Rory's social life at Yale is somewhat pitiful so she comes home pretty much every weekend yet she has zero interaction with Dean and Lindsey and they are not involved in anything at all that happens, even the major town events.
I mention this because Rory is drawn back into Dean's orbit in the episode after Jess drops his love bomb and runs in a major way and their relationship continues to get more and more inappropriate in the last third of the season. Dean sells Rory his sob story of how Lindsay is pushing him to work (even though we later see that she's trying pretty hard to be the stay-at-home wife he wanted and make him happy). Rory chastises Dean for dropping out of college, seemingly oblivious to the fact that his goals were never the same as hers were and wanting them to be the same isn't going to erase their incompatibility. And of course, while this is all going on Luke's ill-advised marriage is also unraveling as he and Lorelai become closer. Given the previous example Lorelai set for her by hooking up with Christopher while he was with Sherry and then making out with Max while she was still technically dating Twilight Dad as well as the separation of the grandparents, it was fairly easy for Rory to conclude that this marriage business really doesn't matter and to look to Dean for comfort and and affirmation as she reminisces about the relationship she thinks she remembers.
And you know what goes away around this time, too? Any of her half-hearted attempts to socialize at Yale or to get something started romantically. She tried being independent and it sucked, so she interprets Dean's possessiveness and desire to limit her interactions with Jess as affection (which is all kind of messed up in itself, but that's another issue). Jess's second love bomb sends her further down that path where she's willing to do just about anything to feel safe again, because she never was allowed to process that break-up and Jess is too messed up at the time to offer her much of an explanation because he doesn't have the language for that either yet.
I still have a lot of trouble processing how Rory suddenly becomes convinced that she wants to relive the halcyon days of a relationship where Dean was often very unhappy with her and that ended because she fell in love with someone she found more intellectually compatible. Even though she is doing some pretty messed up rationalization leading up to her deflowering, she literally goes from "maybe you and Lindsay should go away together" to "Oh, I always knew this would happen! Let me play you this atrocious song to commemorate the occasion!" in two minutes (and we all know the sex took even less time). She backs off pretty soon afterwards and doesn't seem to mourn (and only seems to date Dean out of pity) but the whole thing is still so improbable, even all these years later. I still don't think she ever wanted a relationship, but she got drawn into the idea that losing her virginity in this way was something that wasn't as threatening as dealing with her feelings for her other ex.
(You know what would be even less threatening? Just boinking Marty and leaving your high school boyfriends alone. Just saying).
So was this character arc planned, or could we have gotten rid of Dean after his wedding? I honestly think it's the latter. He could have disappeared after the wedding and we'd have a completely different storyline. Probably a better one.
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Gilmore Girls Season 1 Thoughts
The ending scene and needle drop gave me chills, what a lovely note to end on. Even though I’m not personally excited about what the girls are, it’s so nice to see them in unbridled enthusiasm together. I just love them so much.
In the past, I’ve viewed this season as kind of blah, just waiting through it to get to the juicier stories and more interesting romantic interests. This isn’t completely untrue now, but it doesn’t feel as boring to me in this rewatch. It’ll probably move up in my season ranking. This has mostly to do with how well the show sets up the familial conflict of the Gilmores, and at this point in my life that’s the most interesting part of the show to me (all of the family dynamics). Maybe I’ve also become [slightly] less cynical as well, and Stars Hollow doesn’t feel as much of a hellscape as it did before. Starting the rewatch in dreary fall and enjoying the warmth, fun and comfort and wanting to look at this show with positivity instead of getting frustrated with it (which tbh is part of the fun for me) probably helps as well. Under the cut is some evolving opinions from many years of watching this show.
The Gilmores: Not much has changed. My admiration for Kelly Bishop continues to grow. I’ve got this idea floating around in my head that the core of Emily and Lorelai’s relationship and why I don’t see much hope in it ever improving is that they both have each other’s number and neither party is comfortable with that.
Tristan: He’s awful and I will always feel that way, but I actually enjoyed having him around this time for Rory’s characterization. Also, in future seasons Chilton gets a lot more screen time and those stories are generally not as interesting; I think this season balanced it well.
At first, she’s overwhelmed by his bullying and doesn’t know how to react but once she’s had enough…oh boy. Watching her verbally dress him down and not let him get away with his attempts to break her will and “just go out with meeeee whine” is so satisfying. She doesn’t let him push her around or try to “out-logic” her; he’s not as skilled at this misdirection as Logan, probably due to age on his part and she’s a lot more grounded and less perpetually stressed out like when she’s at Yale. And yet, she attempts to be his friend and is empathetic towards him. She cares about being truthful and not hurting his feelings about the kiss. (“I think someone is recovering from their heartbreak just fine.” This right here is what I’m saying about ABs acting skill! Perfect tone.) But even despite her empathy, she doesn’t let his mistreatment make her forget her boundaries. This is the Rory I know and love and who she is at the core. Strong. Understanding. Empathic. Sees the best in people. But knows what’s best for her.
Dean: As a teenager: “yawn, I guess the lead has to have a romantic interest, whatever.”
Last rewatch: seeing and getting angry about his toxicity, probably a bit too early if I’m being honest. The early scenes, not my thing but I don’t need to pick apart every little thing. Now I’ve got a concise way to express what I don’t like about the relationship, put into words after hearing Rory’s outburst at the town meeting: he doesn’t let Rory talk.
Because sometimes you have something you need to say but you can't because the words won't come out or you get scared or you feel stupid, so if you could write a song and sing it then you could say what you need to say…and people would listen…
The “I love you” scene in the car has been discussed ad nauseam but the fact he wouldn’t give her any space to explain herself is what angers me the most. I get that he’s a teenager and it hurts to feel like you’re more into the relationship than the other party, but if he let her talk and listened I could forgive a little easier the impromptu breakup or it could have gone better. But I don’t know, I don’t think he was emotionally mature enough to understand how her upbringing could make her tentative about saying “I love you.” She wanted to be certain in her feelings and knew it meant a lot, and with her voracious reading habit, probably has an idea of what love may feel like and needed time to assess. Him mocking her for that pisses me off. My criticism of him is similar to how I feel about Max: both of these guys don’t know their respective Gilmore girl and have made them into shiny objects to admire but not treat as full human beings. Maybe a bit harsh, but I’m dramatic.
I have no tolerance for angry jealousy which affects how I see this character. If Dean was played in a way that showed more confusion, sadness, or vulnerability, I could have more compassion for the character. But his hair-trigger anger, I just can’t with it.
Max: Alright, this guy is where most of my opinions have changed. Before it was just “yawn, okay whatever, of course she’s going to date other people before Luke.” Now? I do not trust this guy to make good relational decisions. This is my in-the-moment reaction, but it basically sums it up. Good chemistry does not necessarily lead to a real connection. That’s really all this relationship was - an attraction - which is fine if it didn’t involve Rory so heavily, especially since I don’t think Lorelai was seriously considering lifelong commitment to him - maybe as a fantasy, a “what if?”, but not for real. Neither of them really knew the other. Lorelai at this point in her life should have some fun and get back in the dating game to figure out what she’s looking for in a relationship if that’s what she wants, but at the expense of her daughter’s boundaries especially at a new school where she’s having a tough time…it’s rough.
It’s hard for me to be mad at Lorelai. 1) I love her. Just to get that out of the way. 2) The way she gets into this relationship and talks about Max highlights her optimistic outlook, desire to explore and wanting something better for herself - I don’t know if he is the one, but he could be. These are good traits but unfortunately, she’s blinded by them. 3) She was thinking about how this would affect Rory! I hated the moment where Max proposes that, like he’s got this amazing idea he totally came up with himself, they should take a break to figure things out when she was the one advocating for that from the beginning??
The scene where Max talks to Rory about Dean at school was so uncomfortable and inappropriate. I don’t necessarily get controlling vibes from Max or that he was trying to worm his way into their lives, but he was so out of line here. Him and Lorelai hadn’t seriously discussed expectations and boundaries in their relationship (which honestly, when does anyone in this show). And then he thought it would be a good idea to get married?? Giant flaming wtf.
#Gilmore Girls#Lorelai Gilmore#Rory Gilmore#anti-dean forester#I don't think it's super anti but for the fans#anti-tristan dugray#are there still tristan stans#I got it when cmm was the hot young actor but now#idk i'll add it anyway
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Mrs Maisel || Gilmore Girls
Okay, so I have a few thoughts after watching the first few episodes of Mrs Maisel and I would really love @stellaluna33 @sagesfandomspot @butchjess @parisgellergf @thegreatwars to chime in, cause what I'm about to say may be unpopular or a little controversial:
Spoilers Ahead if you haven't watched the S5 premiere of Mrs Maisel!!!
So, as we all know: Stephanie Hsu aka Mei Lin, is officially out of the Maisel narrative and here's how she was written out:
She has officially moved to Chicago for her residency, she (presumably- it was hinted at) ended her pregnancy and broke up with Joel.
So, from an interview with ASP and Dan Palladino, this is what she quoted about Mei:
“[She] was brought in for a hot blast [to knock] Joel off of his axis [and] out of the Midge world, she also represent[ed] the next generation of women that would be coming up after Midge, who might be thinking a little ahead of the game, like, ‘Maybe before I get married and have kids, I’m gonna accomplish this.’ Midge was a little late for that. She fell into her ambition. Stephanie was playing those girls in the 60s who are, like, ‘I’ve seen my mom’s way, and maybe I’m going to do it a slightly different way.'”
Another quote from Dan Palladino was:
“We wanted to show Joel with a woman who was even more independent than Midge was. Midge embraced the Betty Crocker myth; Mei did not. So [her] pregnancy [teed up] an inevitable conclusion [for the character].”
So, I was thinking and I know it's controversial but-
What if Rory could have that same thing?
Everyone has assumed that Rory will follow in her mother's footsteps, become a single mom and thrive in a career, but that doesn't have to necessarily be the same.
The fact is that Rory had more support than Lorelai when she got pregnant. And she's on the cusp of something, just like Mei. So she could and it's a big could, that she ends the pregnancy.
IMHO, what would be the bigger kick was if Rory miscarried- that would have even more hurtful effects than if she willingly terminated the pregnancy. Given Rory's character arc and personality, she would definitely take it hard and she would then try to bury her grief by burying herself into her career but then she could push away her family, and have zero interest in romantic relationships till she slowly starts growing out of that shell she went into in the later seasons of Gilmore Girls and AYITL, and also by opening up to, and in my perspective, someone like Jess, who she has a healthy platonic/romantic connection with; and this has to be of the opposite sex, I don't think Lorelai, Lane or Paris would help, given that they are moms and Rory would feel a pang of jealousy and sadness given that she may interpret the miscarriage as a mistake on her part and that it was the universe's way of saying that she's not cut out or fit to be a mom. In this way, she shrinks into Lorelai's shadow and this again amps up the drama.
Anyway, I like that ASP has these kinds of narrative parallels that are shocking but actually work- they are controversial, given that we are in a post Roe vs Wade conflict, but it's very realistic and understandable when you analyse it on a microscopic level.
To conclude, I would like to point out the central theme of Maisel's final season which is summarized in a single quote by Mei as well as the parallels that are set with Midge through the flashforwards of Esther, Ethan and Midge's future:
“I can’t have it all, Joel. If I’m really going to be a doctor then I have to be a doctor.”
And Midge in her 60 minutes interview saying:
"Lucky in life, unlucky in love."
So, it could be the same for Rory and what she chooses: being her mom (continuing what AYITL sets up) or forging her own path (Like Mei) or dealing with something that is her own individual trauma that no one has experienced and she has to deal with it firsthand.
So... Thoughts Please!!!
#rory gilmore#lorelai gilmore#paris geller#lane kim#mei lin lee#mrs maisel#the marvelous mrs maisel#midge maisel#joel maisel#season 5#narrative parallels#amy sherman palladino#daniel palladino#character rants#its very reminiscent of coleen Hoover's It Ends With Us#it ends with us#gilmore girls ayitl#possible outcomes after those 4 last words#jess mariano
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i don’t care for logan and how he affects rory a lot of the time but i think using the end of season 5/beginning of season 6 plotline for your arguments against him is A Choice, like sure stealing the yacht and all the partying were things she wouldn’t have done without him but taking a break from yale was alllll due to what mitchum said to her (AND in fairness to logan he was angry when he found out and was ready to start a fight with his dad over doing that to her until she stopped him)
not to mention like YES obviously college was the right place for rory to be but! fans getting mad at her for taking time off and mad at logan for his influence there like.....i know the show frames it in such a way that makes it look like rory is in the wrong there, because she goes back and with that is able to fix things with lorelai, but like she is not the villain she’s turned into by that storyline, and neither is logan. college isn’t for everyone! dropping out is not a bad thing, it’s not a weakness, and she did not deserve to be cut off by her mother because she decided to take that time off! and even if she hadn’t decided to go back, like hey if jess hadn’t given her that push, she was already realizing she was unhappy with the state of her life, so she would’ve figured out a different path that worked for her without completing her education whether at that time or ever, like rory is a very ambitious character and works hard in whatever situation she’s in so she still would’ve found a way to follow her passions with or without yale
and sure rory was right in a lot of the things she said at the bar, that he’s not fighting this future he’s being pushed into and that all he does is party which doesn’t really give her any other options in terms of getting to spend time with him, plus her own friends are far away so the only way to get time with her peers at that point is by going to bars with logan and his friends, but she could in fact say no (though again i understand not doing so because sometimes something is better than nothing) AND while he is a contributing factor to her increasing unhappiness at that point, dropping out was her choice - again motivated by the belief that she won’t be able to reach her dreams thanks to mitchum - and logan just...didn’t really have anything to do with that particular factor, yeah he could’ve done more to convince her to go back but it was still ultimately her decision, one he didn’t influence either way
idk i just feel like most of the gg fandom thinks it’s ooc or wrong that rory dropped out and most of the literati fandom blames logan for that “bad” decision and any others she makes and it’s like, we can absolutely talk about the way he mistreats and manipulates her at times, but also acknowledge that she is capable of making her own right and wrong choices, and that while dropping out of yale ultimately wasn’t what she truly wanted, that doesn’t mean it was the wrong decision for her at that point in time
#like idk do y'all not think of that time as shaping her and ultimately motivating her even more to get what she wants in life?#like with regards to school and her future career she was thriving for the rest of the series sooooo#gilmore girls#rory gilmore#anti logan huntzberger#anti rogan#just to be safe
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Do you ever think about what could’ve been going through Lorelai’s head when Rory (kind of) told what almost happened in the bedroom in the episode after leg max? I do. And it ain’t pretty. At the start of the episode she was playfully teasing Rory for having two boys fight over her. And by the end her daughters implying her current boyfriend tried to assault her in a strangers bedroom. It’s every parents worst nightmare.
PS: I’m sorry if this is too dark of an ask. You can delete this is you want.
Oh that’s okay anon, I’m good. I’ll put up a tw: sexual assault for anyone else who might need it though.
When I first watched that episode, I remember being very surprised at how little she pressed Rory for information, because I seriously would have been FREAKING. OUT. That mess is TERRIFYING, and you just know that as a mother - every single alarm bell was going off in her head. Jess should count his lucky stars over Lorelai not hunting his butt down in California and showing up on his doorstep like
Because seriously - her ability to remain calm until she got to the bottom of things was nothing short of superhuman to me. I would have wanted to know EVERYTHING, because I would want to know exactly how angry I should be with this kid. We as the viewer at least had the benefit of being there in the room with them, so we know exactly how far things did or didn’t go - but Lorelai didn’t have that advantage. All she had to go on was that it was a “thing in Kyle’s bedroom”, Rory rejected his advances, and Jess may or may not have gotten mad at her for it. I’d be seeing red for real.
For the life of me, I cannot understand why Jess fans hate Lorelai for “treating Jess unfairly”. On several occasions, she defended him and rationalized his behavior, and this was actually one of those occasions! LIKE ??!?!? What more could anyone EXPECT from this woman??? To get down and grovel and worship at his feet?
The fact that she let them date at all shows a huge amount of trust in him that he never really earned. SHE DID NOT LIKE HIM, and yet she still gave them space, and played devil’s advocate every time Rory expressed doubts about their relationship. She went above and beyond to show support for them, and to think Jess broke that trust by pushing himself on Rory, and then blowing out of town, causing her daughter to feel like a piece of disposed trash?
Again:
Lucky stars.
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JENNIFER
I'm Jennifer Ava McHale. I've often been described as kind, caring, and responsible. I don't entirely accept it, but I do appreciate the compliments. A brunette with caramel highlights, my hair is long and wavy. I have light blue eyes. I'm of Scottish and Gaelic descent. Katherine, my younger sister, resembles me in every way possible, except her personality. Her full name: Katherine Lea McHale. We are four years apart. I was born in February and Katherine, October. That didn't mean things were awkward. In fact, Katherine was smarter than most of her friends and even helped me with Math. Basic Mental Math.
"Dammit!" I would say with a soft disappointed sigh. A comment I'd make just to myself.....except she heard everything I'd say.
"I'm smart," she said with a wink and quick grin. "I just am, you know?"
Overconfidence much? Not to mention the arrogance that comes with it.
Katherine and I were die-hard fans of Gilmore Girls and loved watching it every Wednesday on the WB. Interestingly, Lorelai and Rory had a remarkable friendship rather than a mother-daughter role play. At least that's what I made out of it.
Mom and Dad were college sweethearts. Their jobs were demanding as expected, but as Katherine and I grew, I took responsibility to monitor and mentor her academically. Intrigued by everything, she was curious and inquisitive, unlike me, who cared only about things I was naturally good at or what interested me.
Family outings were days I'd look forward to ... until it came down to playtime. I would just stand and watch. Isn't that the job of the older kid? "She's your responsibility. Keep an eye on her."
Katherine wanted to be the center of attention as usual and would scream, push others off the slide, and throw balls at them. She always had her way with me ... but I certainly couldn't allow that for others.
"Go apologize to that kid right now! You just threw balls at him, and it hit him in the eye!"
"No! He was standing near my fort!"
I looked over and saw what I had already pictured in my mind, a small group of balls. There wasn't anything new about this. As I rolled my eyes and shook my head, I walked up to her and scolded her.
"Apologize right now, or I'm gonna tell Mom and Dad."
Grounding was harsh in our house. No television for a month, no going out with friends, no shopping: a lot of "no no's." Katherine knew this meant real business.
"I'm sorry I threw balls at you; would you like to play with me?" Katherine asked apologetically.
Soon the boy and Katherine were having great fun helping each other with each of their "forts." So engrossed in playing with him, she didn't want to leave even when Mom and Dad tugged on her. And just as I was about to get my sigh of relief, the boy's parents walked in. Mom recognized them.
"Aren't you the Watsons who moved into the Mulberry community?"
"Yes, we are! Pleasure to meet you! I'm Savannah, that's Frank, and that's our son Jack."
"Oh, that's great! I'm Regina, that's James, she's Jennifer, and that's my younger daughter, Katherine. Looks like they've been having a lot of fun," Mom said with a chuckle.
Introductions were made. Great. Just great. This meant we were gonna spend more time there, which meant more work for me. As I looked over at Jack and Katherine, I listened to adult talk; you know, the adult sports and job talk? I wasn't surprised when the discussion of kids was also brought up.
Rowland High School was more competitive compared to other district schools. I loved to teach, and my favorite subject was chemistry. I equated the experience to reading Harry Potter.
I simply couldn't put the book down. I also had a strong liking for art, especially baking and decorating. I volunteered to do just that at parties. One of my dreams was to open a bakery with Katherine when we were old enough. My best friends were Nicole Swift, George Wood, Nick Kauffman, Angela Depp, and Divya Rajagopalan. We looked different, but that didn't define us.
Regardless of Nicole's braided dreadlocks or George's afro, Nick's orangish-blonde hair or Angie's blue eyes and jet-black hair, Divya's beautiful traditional nose ring, we enjoyed each other's company and culture. Everyone bonded really well, and there was great chemistry. Group studies rocked.
There were other kids in the class, but we had developed an instant connection—easy to maintain but hard to find—stemming from our personalities. We could never be fake with each other. Never let our egos clash because our friendship was valued over petty disagreements.
I was Nick's secret admirer. It didn't take long for the girls to figure it out until one day, I wore a red dress and curled my hair while they wore shorts and crop tops. The boys wore tanks and shorts. I guess I couldn't have been more obvious. As we walked in the park and the boys headed to play soccer, the interrogation session began. Yes, their hunches were accurate.
"We get it," they all said together. "You're in love with him."
I'd been caught in the act ... only because I'd begun reapplying my favorite Estée Lauder lip gloss over my already glossed lips. Trying to say something, further, to salvage the situation, I stood there awkwardly, shrugging.
As I got employed at Rocky's Deli, it significantly lessened my communication with Nick. Things were going great until he and George asked me if I could get them jobs as well. I couldn't deny them since I wanted to avoid a confrontation with Nick.
"I mean, yeah ... I'm his friend, you know? Just a friend helping another friend. It's the least I can do," I assured George.
"By the way, thanks for the job. I owe you one." He winked as he walked away.
April 6th: That's the day when Beth Stonecroft walked into the deli and changed my fate forever. She was this gorgeous, tall, toned blonde. One of her distinctive features was her long legs. Beth earned more waiting tips than anyone else. Oozing with confidence and charisma, she'd go the extra mile to satisfy the customers. It was fine until she made a move on Nick. I couldn't help but eavesdrop.
"So ... Nick, you play soccer, right?" she asked in her high-pitched voice, which was not just annoying, it was intolerable.
"I play to relieve my stress," said Nick straightening his hair. "In fact, George and I play at the park often."
"Can't wait to check you out," I heard Beth say.
How cheesy.
As I turned, I saw them in close proximity.
"Wanna hang out sometime?" she asked.
"Sure," said Nick with a slight nod. "How about this weekend?"
"You got it!" exclaimed Beth.
My jaw dropped in disbelief. It took two minutes to seal the deal. Was it that easy? Beth and Nick soon became exclusive and flaunted their affection everywhere we went as a group and even at work. Out of frustration, I once blurted, "Get a room." I'd probably had to smile to say it, but it really stung.
Rubbing it in my face at work began to take a toll on me—causing me to sob in the bathroom—reminding me of all the ways I wasn't good enough and that I never could have a shot with him. The door flung open; it was George. Seeing my tear-stained face, he sat beside me, holding my hand, before leaning to hug me. I began to sob harder.
"I'm really sorry," he said softly in my ear. "I hope things get better and he breaks up with her. But I'm here for you."
I became numb to the pain and, just to avoid having to bump into Nick, requested that I be shifted to the ground floor—preventing any interaction with either and plugging in my headphones. As I unwrapped a bag of romaine lettuce, I heard a familiar voice call out my name.
I turned around to see my little spoilt, bratty sister standing behind the counter with a bag in her hand.
"I got you chicken soup!" she exclaimed.
Nodding at her in acknowledgment, I wanted to take the shortcut to walk up to her—Katherine could be clumsy, and I wanted to avoid having an embarrassing moment. Nick was arranging the baking trays on the rack, and instead of standing still, holding the soup, she just had to walk up to him and make conversation.
"Hey! Jennifer loves you!"
Nick was in disbelief as he looked up.
I hurried down and grabbed the bag from her. Glaring at her in contempt, my face turned red, and I clenched my fists.
"Uh-oh," she murmured softly as she ran out of the deli.
Facing me, Nick squinted his eyes, confused. I tried to walk out, but he wouldn't let me go.
"What's the matter with you?" he said, grabbing my hand. "Why are you acting so weird? You.......... love me? Is that true?"
"No," I said firmly. "I might have just blurted something out in my sleep. That doesn't mean anything. I mean, everyone says crazy things in their sleep. I'm sure you do too. It's nothing new."
As I began walking towards the door, he pinned me against the wall again.
"Look, I don't know what happened," he said softly. "But I do care about what you think of me. You're one of my best friends. Why can't you be honest with me?"
"Because!" I said, tearing up. "Because you don't feel for me! You wouldn't have started dating Beth if you had feelings for me!"
"So it's my fault that I started dating someone else because you couldn't be honest with me?!" he yelled.
"NO!" I snapped, burying my face in my palms.
It wasn't until I took a few long deep breaths through my soft sobs that I raised my head to make conversation.
"I ... I need to leave ... and I just—I can't be in the same room with you right now. I'm resigning."
Nick and I glanced at each other before I walked out. There was no closure to the conversation, but I didn't want any, not after what had just happened. The deli's policy was to give a week's notice before resignation. That just made things worse. Fully aware of her actions, Katherine tried to downplay the situation, making excuses to project herself as the innocent one. It wasn't until Mom and Dad raised their tones and threatened to ground her that she stepped out of her room. Knowing too well she couldn't lie any further, she broke down, cried uncontrollably, and followed behind me. Disgusted, knowing far too well this was another sham, I slammed the door on her face.
"I'm sorry!" I heard her plead. "Please! Please forgive me! I didn't mean it!"
It was too late. The damage was done.
I had never cussed at Katherine before, nor had I gotten so angry with her. But this time, she had gone too far. I was always the sister who let small things slide and never held her responsible, even when she threw tantrums. I was emotionally mature.
She kept knocking on the bedroom door the entire night in an attempt to get my attention. I didn't let her in. I was so upset and hurt that I couldn't sleep with everything that had happened. The following day, I found Katherine sleeping right outside. She awoke with the sound of the door and tried to apologize once again. I ignored her. Ready for school, I stepped out of the house but slowly turned and looked at her, deadpan.
"Find someone who can take you."
"But ... I ... what if no one wants to?"
"Well, you've got legs. Use them."
I got into the car and started the ignition. From the rearview mirror, I could see her tear up. It was hard because Nick and I were not on talking terms, but we shared friends in common. I was hurt when they would speak to him, laugh during lunch breaks and in-class periods. Literally, one week changed everything.
But I had to understand that this situation was between him and me, not the others. I became immune to the fact that he was dating someone else. I had to understand that it was time to move on, and I couldn't let it affect my grades. But things weren't normal anymore. Mom was furious. I found out later that day that Katherine had walked to school and managed to get a ride home.
"She's just a kid!" yelled Mom. "Just because she did something wrong doesn't mean you become selfish and irresponsible! What if something happened to her?!"
"I'm sorry," I said very quietly and tried to walk off, but Mom pulled me back.
"Knock it off! I know that you're upset, but you don't get to disrespect me and your dad! You won't repeat this again, do you get me?! Am I making myself clear?!"
"Yes ma'am," I answered, nodding my head.
I headed straight to my room. On the bed, I found a note.
"I'm sorry for the pain I caused you. I didn't mean to hurt you so deeply. I was just trying to tease you as you would tease me. But I guess I forgot to understand that this was personal, and I shouldn't have joked about that. I'm sorry for all the times I took you for granted, and I'll try to be better. You're the best big sister I could have asked for. Can you please forgive me?"
Although I had forgiven her, I wasn't ready to accept her apology. I still bore a grudge, and I wanted her to understand the situation's intensity and the emotional impact on me. I knew that she had apologized sincerely, but I was still pained by the fact that I was made to look like a fool to the guy I really had feelings for. I appeared stone cold.
Katherine soon began learning to bike on the new bike she'd received as a gift from Mom and Dad. Although I pretended like I didn't care, I peeped to take a look. It certainly was a new flashy pink bike. It had the words "SLUMBER PARTY" printed in bold letters across the body. She also had a matching pink helmet. As she biked around the neighborhood, she just had to boast.
Easter weekend was approaching. The venue chosen for the Easter hunt was Foxtail Park. Each year a family in the community would decorate the park a day before Easter and hide eggs all over the park. This time it was our turn. It was April 12th. Katherine and I decided to head to the park at noon and begin decorating. As I loaded everything into the car, I saw her sit inside. Angered by her lack of help, I marched up to the front of the car, opened the door, and dragged her out. She fell to the ground, looking at me, shocked.
"Get out. If you're gonna tell Mom and Dad ... I'll never talk to you ever again. You loser!"
But before she could answer, I hopped into the car and took off. I knew Mom warned me earlier, but honestly, I didn't care for what she put me through. I could see her wearing her helmet and sitting on her bike. I knew the route she was going to take. It was just behind a small neighborhood we'd been to. Fifteen minutes passed ... and I saw no sign of Katherine. I got into the car and drove back, heading in the direction she rode off in. As I parked, I saw her bike lying on the grass ... beside it was a puppy's abandoned collar.
We called the police ... but nothing panned out. It was hard to look into the mirror. There was a lump in my heart. What reflected was anger, shame, lack of judgment, stupidity, and carelessness. I punched the mirror. The glass shattered. My knuckles and palm bled profusely. For the first time, I cried out loud. I was in so much pain, and I hid my true feelings and swallowed them deep inside, pretending that I was OK and convincing myself I was alright since my hope kept me going. The truth was simple. I wasn't alright. I bandaged my hand and tried to hide it from Mom and Dad. But they found out and confronted me about it when I cut an apple.
"I slipped and fell on the pavement when I was taking out the trash."
"I saw the shattered glass in your room," Mom said.
"It's fine, Mom, it's alright."
"Listen, Jen, I know you've been pretty hard on yourself lately with everything that's been going on. I hope you understand that your Mom and I don't blame you for what happened," he said reassuringly. "We were just ... emotional."
And though I desperately wanted to say something, I held back and instead went up to my room and began packing all my belongings. Walking down the stairs, I noticed Mom's face buried in her palms while Dad put his arm around her shoulder, trying to comfort her.
"I'm moving out," I said, staring at the floor. "There's nothing left of me."
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On the Gilmore girls subreddit its treated as a fact that jess sexually assaulted rory… and wouldved r*ped her. They act like the reason he was mad was bc she didn’t want to have sex which clearly wasnt it at all. I get so perplexed bc it seems logan fans purposely misread the show to hate jess
Oof. GG subreddit Strikes Again. Ok, so... This is nobody's favorite scene/subject to unpack, but I'll do my best, so here goes... Obviously, first of all I don't agree with this take on things. I don't think that's what the show was trying to communicate and I don't think that's an accurate assessment of Jess's character. That said, I also need to make it clear that I'm not going to claim that Jess's behavior in that scene was ok. Like, I'm not going to argue that he "did nothing wrong," because he absolutely did. But "not ok" behavior is... a scale, a continuum. Ugh, I already feel like I'm botching this. At it's most basic level, I think this scene comes down to (once again) misunderstanding and a breakdown in communication, and it's similar to "Swan Song" in that the audience is given more information than some of the characters are. The context is crucial here, so I'm going to break it down.
First of all, I want to deal with the claim that "the reason he was mad was because she didn't want to have sex." I truly do not think that is what happened at all, and this is in large part due to the fact that the show made a point to imply that this was not the case. Even Rory herself, having no additional information, expressed doubt about it. During the conversation Rory has with Lorelai in the car, Lorelai said, "Well, if he got mad at you for not wanting to have sex with him, then he's a jerk." (True!) But then Rory says that she doesn't know if that's why he was upset, because he won't talk to her, and the rest of the conversation centers on his refusal to open up to her, NOT "what happened in Kyle's bedroom." The fact that they made a point of including this: a. emphasizes the idea that there might be more going on here, b. shows that RORY thinks there might be more going on here (which also implies that "Jess getting mad because she wouldn't sleep with him" seemed hard-to-believe or out-of-character for him, to her. Something is wrong, because it's weird.), and c. reminds the audience that we DO know there's more going on here!
Unlike Rory, WE KNOW that Jess had just been told that he flunked out of highschool and wouldn't be able to take Rory to prom (which he really wanted to do, given the way we saw him begging Principal Merton to let him go). We know that Jess has been upset about that all day (and even though Rory didn't know the details, she sensed it), and furthermore, when Rory says, "I don't know what I did," and runs out crying, we see Jess kind of sag defeatedly and say, "You didn't do anything," before running after her (presumably to apologize). He's not mad at her! He was never mad at her. He was only ever mad at himself.
Now I have to address what happened, and the context here is, again, CRUCIAL. Here are some things we know about Jess: we know that Physical Touch is one of the primary ways he expresses affection, and we know that expressing himself verbally is difficult for him even on an ordinary day, let alone when he's experiencing great emotional turmoil. Here is the sequence of events: Jess retreats upstairs to be alone, Rory comes to find him to ask what's wrong, Jess is unable to tell her. Rory asks, "You're not tired of me, are you?" and Jess, still unable to speak, responds by kissing her softly. This causes Rory to smile and say, "That's a pretty good answer!" to which Jess responds by kissing her more, until things get out of hand. Now I want to be clear: he should have stopped the first time she said, "Wait," and she shouldn't have had to push him away. But he DID stop, and in his mind, I truly don't think he intended to take advantage of her or scare her in any way. He heard his girlfriend say that she was afraid he was tired of her, and he wanted to reassure her that he wanted her. And he screwed it up, partly because he didn't talk to her, and partly because he didn't want to believe that he had failed yet again when he'd already failed everything else. I've never been in this exact situation, but I have had the experience of trying to show someone I love them, and ending up accidentally hurting them instead. It's a horrible feeling. He should not have reacted so defensively either, but unfortunately I understand that too. Have you ever felt like you've been screwing everything up, and then you make an impulsive decision that turns out to have been really stupid? And you feel so embarrassed and so ashamed, and then someone asks you, "What were you thinking?!" and you don't even know what to say? Because it made some sort of sense in your head, but now you know it'll just sound stupid, and in your shame and self-loathing you just want to scream and want them to stop and leave you alone, even though you know it's all your fault? Because I have, and that's exactly what I think Jess was feeling too and why he lashed out the way he did. AGAIN, that doesn't make it "ok," but at the same time, I think it's unfair and inaccurate to construe his behavior as malicious or with intent to harm, especially when it seemed clear to me that he was immediately regretful, knew he was in the wrong, and intended to apologize.
Was the scene badly written and/or unnecessary, a product of its time (when such scenes weren't seen so seriously), or simply to cause drama to break them up? Maybe all of those things are true as well, as I've heard others say. But it felt necessary to me to go into what I think the show was TRYING to do with this scene, and how the characters might have gotten there. I still hate it, and it makes me feel anxious and wretched, but I do understand it, as an example of the terrible misunderstandings that can happen when people fail to communicate.
#Gilmore Girls#Jess Mariano#Literati#I feel soooo anxious about this guys#PLEASE nobody attack me for this
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Rory dropping out of Yale; my thoughts
So I grew up in an Asian household (think Lane's family but with a mother-daughter relationship similar to Lorelai and Rory) where it was instilled in me from a very young age that a) handouts are for the weak and we should work for every single opportunity available b) do not waste the opportunities you get even a little bit. My parents took these fundamentals to the extreme sometimes, leading to Paris levels of insanity (more so because they're both academics), whereas I quickly realised that taking the easy path isn't necessarily a BAD thing. That being said, I was still very very shocked when Rory dropped out of Yale. I watched Gilmore Girls with my mom and the difference in thought really shined through when she just couldn't accept Jess not graduating (whereas I understood perfectly) but then there were also similarities in the way that we were both horrified when Rory accepted the internship from Mitchum. In fact, my mom very nicely told me that if I ever drop out of college like that she will hound me day and night until I go back.
So why is this important exactly? This school of thought that me and my family have, that rejects any sense of privilege (mostly because we don't have any) is very similar to Lorelai's (though she could pick and choose when she wanted to renounce her privilege) and this is by extension what Stars Hollow and Lane and Jess represented to Rory. On the other hand there's the world that we know nothing about; Emily, Richard, Logan, the DAR, these were the things that Rory discovered when she dropped out of Yale and essentially rejected her mother’s path for her. I hated this storyline, not because it was bad, but because it was so exceedingly well written that it made me very uncomfortable. Here is this girl, very similar to me as in she's a gifted child who is just tired of schooling and needs a break. But unlike me, she has the privilege to completely give up on the dreams she was working towards just because it was hard.
Unlike Lorelai, Rory liked her grandparents' world, even in the earlier seasons (the debutante ball for example). She was just never given the chance to fully embrace it because at that point she was still under her mother's control. So it's no surprise that when the dreams and life she had carved out for herself with the help of her mother failed (Mitchum telling her she didn't have "it" to be a journalist) she ran in the opposite direction from that life. The situation is a layered and complex one, and I truly believe if Richard and Emily had let Lorelai handle it then Rory would've been back at Yale sooner, if not immediately. Maybe she would've worked a little or looked at other courses but if she was with her mother instead then she wouldn’t have lost her sense of self so completely. But... Rory needed to lose her sense of self at that point, mostly because it was so tied with Lorelai and her dependence on her, so to become her own person she had to make some really bad decisions. She also needed to be fully immersed in the privileged lifestyle to realise that she didn't want that either.
Unfortunately this drastic and sudden shift in support systems left Rory reeling and as a consequence left her even more confused and floating than she had been right after she got “feedback” from Mitchum and stole the yacht. Which is why we see her struggling with her daily routine, she tries to accept what the luxurious lifestyle entails (partying with Logan for example) but simultaneously looks for echoes of a previous life (throwing herself into organisation and planning for the DAR).
I don't know if this is a popular opinion or not, but according to me Rory didn't go back to Yale because of Jess. By the time he came into the picture she was already 90% there, she was tiring of the easy, aimless path and wanted the challenge of having a dream again. She just needed one last push. I do think it was important that it was Jess who was the one who gave that push, for a couple of reasons; a) full fucking circle, she helped him at his rock bottom and he made something of himself thus making her come to the uncomfortable realisation that the roles have changed b) no one else was around to do it, Lorelai had given up on her, Logan was useless and Paris wasn't intuitive enough to know that she needed it. And honestly, if Richard or even Logan tried, they wouldn't have been successful because to Rory they very clearly represented the easy path and she wouldn’t have listened to them and lastly, c) Jess and Lorelai had the exact same character arcs, which is why he's the only one other than her mother who would've gotten through to Rory. Jess says and represents the same things Lorelai does, but because of timing (the ONE time their timing was good) and their relationship being different from Rory and Lorelai, what he said is exactly what she needed to hear at that moment.
Rory's burnout of epic proportions was a long time coming, she had a difficult time in Chilton, an even harder time in Yale and it didn't help that her personal life was almost always in shambles. The reason this burnout derailed her as much as it did was because of the play of privilege. If Rory didn't have her grandparents to fall back on, she would've done what the rest of us did; suck it up or find a different career path. But she did have them, and while the route her character arc takes is unrelatable to me, it stays true to the storyline and the situation that Rory is in.
#gilmore girls#rory gilmore#lorelai gilmore#emily gilmore#richard gilmore#gilmore girls meta#jess mariano#character meta#notice how i don't mention paris much#it's because she doesn’t represent either world#but accepts that rory needs time to find herself
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alright, my friends! i have some test muses i want to try out before i commit to them and add them to my blog, as well as some muses i am somewhat revamping. i’m gonna be starting a personal “verse” about a small town that has some suspicious behavior. so like this if you want a small starter from any of the muses under the cut!
elvis johan welty — tattoo artist/charming crime lord, 40-45, bisexual. canonically has two sweet children with his ex-wife who he’s on amazing terms with. owns one of strangeville’s best (and only) tattoo shops, does custom work and is one of the most gentle crime lords that the city has ever seen. doesn’t always have to be a crime lord, but is abundantly rich in most verses. he works with all kinds of supernatural beings with no judgement, as long as he gets paid. tom hardy.
zeppelin hans welty — podcast host/true crime writer, 27-30, heterosexual. things happen in zep’s life that just isn’t right or normal. he becomes a witness to horrible things, and then can write them in a compelling way. but why do they keep happening to him? he’s quiet, a little bit jaded, but uses dark humor to make up for it all. lives with his half-brother some of the time, but mostly tries to stay out of strangeville. barry koeghan.
wren abigail stark — detective/private investigator, 47, bisexual. when she was fourteen, she had a kid but her parents offered to raise him like her brother and that is what came of quinn stark. to deal with the stress, she pushed herself into her work. she has an uncanny ability to predict things that were about to happen... always working off of a gut feeling. but she lives like a bachelor in a one bedroom apartment that smells like stale pizza at all times. amy adams.
vaughn jacob advena — sheriff of strangeville, 30-35, heterosexual. people come and go, but the advena family stayed in tact. he took over as sheriff from his father but wasn’t sure if he had the heart. he swore up and down that he’d leave the town, but he never managed to. now any secrets that he has to keep makes him a bitter, jaded human being. he’s turned to alcohol to quell his paranoia, and hides some of the town’s weirdest secrets. miles teller.
virgil “gil” michael advena — motel owner/landlord, 25-29, bisexual. for some reason, gil was always happy to stay despite what his brother wanted. his mother raised him to be a ‘good boy’ and even though extreme anxiety takes over at time (keeping him up days at a time) he thinks that what he does is good. he takes people in, the motel barely making enough to keep itself running... but as long as he helps, who cares? will poulter.
dax felipe martinez — children’s book author, 40-45, bisexual. it’s interesting that a bitter old man would decide to write children’s books... except those are the only things that sold. in fact, he was a children’s book manufacturer with how many he could come up with at a time. but he hated kids, and he hated people. when he had enough money he bought acres and acres of inhabited land outside of strangeville... living in the middle of the woods in a small cabin. oscar isaac.
knox kensington taylor — rich kid/business owner, 25-30, heterosexual. maybe his family made a deal with the devil, or maybe they are just using the entire town as their own person bank... but knox owns one of the smaller ‘taylor’ businesses in strangeville. he never questions where the money comes from, but he is part of a secret society. your typical rich kid who just wants to experience life, taking risks anywhere he can. completely arrogant and annoying, but you can’t help but want to know more. mike faist.
lorelai “rory” hudson (ຊiphrนth) — kindergarden teacher/alien, unknown, bisexual. when rory landed on earth, she was not ‘rory’. in fact, she had no idea the english/human language at all. the first thing she ever did was binge watch gilmore girls over and over until she learned english, so most of her personality comes from that. she chose the name because rory was her favourite character... and because she didn’t know what a normal ‘human’ name was. and then she binge watched glee, so she’s all over the place. but kids love her, and she just wants to live a normal human life since her family abandoned her on earth. victoria pedretti.
#indie rp#indie crime rp#indie horror rp#indie smut rp#indie lesbian rp#mutuals even if we have 100 things pls like! i have a lot of muse for the newbies
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Rory Gilmore - everyone I think cringes at least a little on Rory’s character progression on Gilmore Girls after season 4 but here is my take on it.
I think Rory grew up in “other peoples houses” a lot and was expected to be well behaved - you can’t really be climbing the walls at the Inn while your mother is working or when your in the diner or wherever. I think she was also out in public a lot being at the front desk at the inn etc. and so being in the public eye when you are very small of course the towns people watch you grow up and think you’re very polite and very cute and she grew to be used to people admiring and liking her.
I think when Rory became a teen she naturally had some inclinations to rebel - this is really normal and actually should be expected but whenever she did rebel she was told “that she wasn’t acting like herself” or she told herself that “this wasn’t her” this is harmful reaction for two reasons
1. By other people telling her that something she did “is not her” it confuses her sense of self. More specifically her sense of self outside of her relationship with Lorelai.
2. By saying something is “not her” it stops her taking ownership and responsibility for her actions. She doesn’t notice patterns in her behavior or have to take responsibilities for anything she does wrong because she was “not herself” when she did it - and so instead of learning from her mistake she begins to view them as her just acting out of character.
I think that when she was growing up a lot of her personality reflected her mother because that’s who she spent the most time with and whatever her mother was reading or watching or listening to that’s what she was interested in as well. I do think Lorelai (unknowingly) pushed the “Havard Dream” onto her a bit and I think it’s a shame this wasn’t explored more. The show seemed to deny that Lorelai did push Havard on her but at the same time whenever Rory strayed from the Havard path her mother got mad.
I think it’s really disappointing that Rory didn’t flounder more at Yale - when she was away from her mother and that her semester away from Yale was treated as her just avoiding her problems or solely as a reaction to Mitchum. I don’t think that Rory just dropped out of Yale because someone criticized her work I think she dropped out because Mitchum Huntzberger newspaper tycoon told her she didn’t have it. I think it is interesting though that her first decision is to just drop out not re-evaluate or change her major especially as the Summer was coming up and she would have gotten some time then to consider what her next move was going to be. I think this might have been because as Lorelai says in season 7 Rory is used to getting what she wants. Unlike Paris who tries so hard and still fails at things she really really wants (getting with Tristan, getting in to Havard, becoming one of the Puffs) Rory has never had any real struggle. She’s and Paris are examples of failure making us stronger - through her failures Paris has gained an ability to bounce back and to change course something Rory has not become adept at. I think it’s a shame Rory didn’t question her decision to become a journalist - why a journalist? why not a novelist? and that it’s interesting that when Jess tells her he’s surprised that she doesn’t explain why she wants to become a journalist but instead said that it’s what she’s been talking about it forever and personally I can’t help but think that she doesn’t feel that she can change her mind.
Another thing can happens in the show when Rory is shown to have conflict with someone she is proven right or she is vindicated by someone else. I refer you to the Ballerina incident. When Rory writes that review where she fat shames the ballerina she only questions how much she actually knows about ballet after the ballerina confronts her and when she tries to change her article to put the ballet in a more flattering light she is told not to. The moral of the story appears to be that sometimes poeple need to develop thicker skins - which is disappointing because this could have been a chance to review some toxicity within the newspaper business and could have been a jumping off point for the show to explore whether Rory really does want to go into the industry.
Rory is actually really privileged and not just in terms of her grandparents paying for Yale but also the freedom of not having to get a part time job for her own day to day expenses because her mom worked so hard and her boyfriend built her a car which helped facilitate the amount of free time she has to study - I’m not saying she didn’t work hard I’m just saying that not everyone has that much free time. Not only that but Lorelai clearly starts making good money quickly enough because Rory’s CD and book collection would have been extremely expensive and so Rory never actually has to give up any free time for her want of material possessions.
Rory also has the privileged of being someones number one priority and the most important person in someones lives and doesn’t have to compete with siblings or boyfriends, other family members or anything for her mother’s attention if she needs help studying Lorelai will help her, if she needs costumes for a Shakespeare play, Lorelai will make them.
But I think there is a lot of pressure put on Rory. She is the bridge between her grandparents world and her mother - she at once is very privileged and is just from a small town. She is supposed to go to Havard and become a famous journalist and nothing less and this can take years.
I think the pressure of having to be amazingly successful combined with the fact that no one becomes amazingly successful right away and even if you are talented because there are millions of talented all bubbled below the surface and gave us.....revival Rory dun dun DUN
#rory gilmore character analysis#rory gilmore#gilmore girls#gilmore girls meta#character analysis#lorelai gilmore
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Hate
Masterlist
Jess Mariano x Reader
You and Jess had a... complicated relationship.
You first met when he moved to your hometown, Stars Hallow, a few years ago. But, then Luke kicked him out. He broke up with your friend Rory, well he ghosted her. He ghosted you as well.
Rory claimed that he'd been distant before he left. That she thought he didn't like her as much as when they started dating. You denied it, saying he was head over heals for her. But you knew you were lying.
Jess had been distant from Rory. Sometimes it was like he was pretending she was someone else. You confronted him about it and he said he had feelings for someone else.
He never told you who though. He left before you could continue that conversation.
You and Rory both attend Yale now.
Her and Paris Geller are your roomates. You and Rory bonded when you were younger over reading and writing.
But that's not how you got here. Well, sort of, but not completely.
Rory had seen Jess when she went to Stars Hallow. He was apparently sleeping in his csr and called you immediately. You were still at Yale, due to a couple friends wanting to hang out for a few extra days.
You drove there immediately. When you get to Rory and Lorelai's house, you walk in without knocking. Rory walks over to you.
"Are you sure it was him?" You ask. She nods with wide eyes.
"I've gotten over him leaving. We were by no means meant to be together. But, I know you still haven't fully healed, so-" you nod.
"He was asleep in his car?" She nods and Lorelai comes over to you. She looked sympathetic.
"I talked to Luke. I'm sure he let him in." You nod, your head was spinning. "Why don't you stay here tonight?" You look up at Lorelai. You nod, sitting on the couch. The two women go to their respected rooms. Your leg was bouncing and your mind wouldn't shut off.
So, you got up, and got in your car.
When you reached Luke's, you notice his car is gone. He's probably at Nicole's. You try to think of what to do next. Then you remember Luke's spare key. You worked here for a few months before leaving for Yale. With Lane.
You had to hop a little to reach it. You quickly go inside, going up the stairs. Silently thankful for Luke not being there so you could freely yell at Jess.
You walk into the apartment above the diner, looking over at the previously unused bed. Where he was asleep. Seemingly peacful. What an asshole.
You grab a pillow from the couch, walking over to him, throwing it at his head to wake him up. He awakes with a jolt. He looks completely freaked. And pissed. No. He has no right to be pissed.
"What the hell?!" He yells, then his eyes land on you. They take a minute to adjust, he looked a little confused for a second.
"Remember me?" You ask, annoyed. His eyes widen a fraction and any anger that was previously there disappeared. He stands up and you take a step back, happily staying away from him.
"Y/N?"
"Oh, so you do remember me. I couldn't have guessed that," you say sarcastically. He takes a step towards you, and you take yet another one back.
"Look, I'm sorry, okay? Luke kick-"
"Don't blame Luke for your idiotic decisions!" He sighs.
"You don't know my side of the story," he says.
"You didn't graduate! For a job you could habe easily gotten once you did graduate! And you left without saying anything! What else is there to know?!" You ask.
"My dad showed up!" You freeze, staring at him. "And Luke hid it from me. I just wanted to get to know him." You try to process his words.
"What the hell does thst have to do with you leaving?"
"That's where I've been. I've been staying with my dad," he says. You take a step towards him, pushing him. He sighs.
"That's not a good enough excuse!" You say.
"I wasn't going to graduate anyways, Y/N!" He says.
"You think that makes it better?!" You push him again, this time he grabs your hands. " I get that Luke kicked you out, but that's your fault. You left Rory and you left me."
He presses his lips together. "How is she?" He asks.
"Over it. Peacefully asleep." He studies you.
"What about you?" He asks. You could feel the tears threatening your eyes. But you refused to let this boy make you cry. Not again. He wasn't worth it.
"What do you think?" You ask, a hint of bitterness in your voice. Maybe more than just a hint. He slid his hands up your arms. You shook your head, pulling away from him. He frowns at you, trying to grab your hand again. You took a couple more steps away from him.
"No. You can't just waltz back in here, acting like nothing happened. You hated this town, so what the hell are you doing back here?"
"My mom is here. She told me that Luke had my car," he says. You roll your eyes. "It's true!"
"I don't doubt it is. But you're not welcome here. By anyone. You should know that. Leaving like that just made everyone in this town hate you more than they already did," you tell him.
"And what about you?" He asks again. "Do you hate me, because that's all I really care about at this point."
"Yeah, you seemed to care so much when you left without a way to find you," you say. "And the answer is yes. Because you left when I- we- needed you most. I do hate you."
You could see the hurt on his face, he looked sad. However, you knew you were lying. You didn't know if it was possible to hate the boy infront of you. But you wished you did.
He seemed shocked to hear you say that, so you take the minute of his silence to leave the apartment. You quickly go downstairs, going up to your car.
You hear footsteps pounding after you. You try to open your car door, but a hand pushes it shut again. You turn to him, opening your mouth to yell at him again. But he beats you to it. Sort of. He doesn't say anything. But he does cut you off.
He had you pinned on your car with his arms, and he pressed his lips to yours. It felt desperate. Like he was trying to explain everything. You were in complete shock. You froze for a moment, accidentally kissing him back for a moment. Purely on instinct. His lips felt soft, and yet had an urgency behind them that was hard to explain. You wanted to kiss him back. In fact, every muscle in your body was dying to melt into him. But, instead, you pushed him away. You stare at him in shock.
"What the hell is wrong with you?!" He lets out a breath, clearly trying to find words. "Stay the hell away from me, Jess," you say. You quickly get in your car. As you start it, he puts his hand above your door, leaning on your car.
"I'm sorry. I just I need you to listen to me," he says. You glare at him through the window.
"Good luck with that," you say sarcastically. You quickly pull away from him, him jumping backwards, in order to not have his foot run over. You were breathless. Completely breathless. You knew you shouldn't have wanted to kiss him back as much as you did. He left you. He left your bestfriend. He was your bestfriend's ex! But every inch of you wanted to stop the car.
When you got back to the Gilmore house, you fell on the couch. Sleep took over your body quickly. The next morning you wake up to Rory, tapping your shoulder.
You groan, propping up on your elbow.
"Coffee?" She asks. You smile slightly and nod. You go into the kitchen with her. "My mom left for work. She'll be back later. She tells you. You nod.
"Great. I have a bag in my car with clothes. I'll be right back," you tell her. She nods, as she starts pouring the coffee. After changing in Rory's room, you walk back out and take a sip of the deliciously strong coffee.
"I know you left last night," she says. You look up at her, taking a sip. "Did you see him?" She asks. You nod. "What happened?"
Despite feeling absolutely shitty about the ending of the previous night's events, you explain it all to her. She nodded along as you told the story. When you tell the end she sighs. She shakes her head, taking a sip of her coffee.
"I'm sorry. I didn't know he was going to-" she cuts you off.
"I figured it was you," she says. You tense up, raising an eyebrow. She chuckles. "I told you, I knew he didn't like me as much. I knew he liked someone else. Jess... he was a good enough person not to act on it until we broke up."
"I told you-"
"I know you were just trying to protect me, Y/N. But I'm over it. And I knew you were the one he liked. And I know you like him, too." You shake your head immediately. She laughs. "It's okay, Y/N! I think he needed to leave. He couldn't be here. He... he needed to be somewhere else. Don't stay mad at him. You two are perfect for eachother. You always have been." You frown down at your coffee.
"But... I told him I hate him. And a part of me does," you say. She nods.
"That's okay. But let him make up for it," she says. You look up at her. Then she stands up, grabbing your hand. She grabs her jacket and you grab yours. "Let's go to Luke's."
When you get there Luke looks at the two of you and swallows. "Uh, hey," he says. You roll your eyes.
"We know, Luke," Rory says. "It's okay." He sighs, giving both of you a small smile.
"Good." He gives both of you coffee and you thank him.
"Do you know where he is?" Rory asks. You snap your eyes to hers.
"No," Luke says. You sigh. He looks at you. After a minute, he slips Rory a napkin and she smiles. She pays and grabs your hand again, pulling you away. When you walk into the bookstore you let out a breath.
"What are we doing here?"
She doesn't answer you and continues walking around, looking for something. Then she freezes when looking down one row of books. She pushes you, walking away. And then you see him. Sitting there. He looks up st you and sighs.
"I'll leave," he says, putting his hands up. He stands up, and you bite your lip.
"I lied last night," you say. He looks at you, confused. "I don't hate you. I wish I did, but I don't. Trust me, I have tried hating you. And I can't. I just... I was so mad at you for leaving the way you did that I didn't even want to try and understand your reasoning." He stands still, clearly hanging onto every word you were saying. "I guess what I mean is that I want to try to understand now."
A small smile appears on his lips. "Who pushed you?" He asks. You smile slightly.
"Rory. I told you, she's not mad at you," you say. He smiles more. But it too fades.
"I'm sorry about last night. I shouldn't have-"
"Don't be sorry for that. For other things, yes. But for that... no." He studies you for a second before smiling. From the smile, you could tell he wasn't sorry about it. And he was clearly very happy that you didn't want him to be.
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