#i freaking cried so hard
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Guys, I am emotionally drained now. I think I will never recover from the Bluey episode The Sign. It hit home way too close for comfort, I freaking had a full on meltdown afterwards.
Thanks so much KIDS show. What the heck!? Now I am going to rethink my entire life here because of this.
#bluey#the sign#love the episode so much#rambles#thoughts#i freaking cried so hard#this episode no one is prepared for#why does bluey make me cry so much?!#the episode reminded me of my entire childhood gone wrong#thanks so much
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Hello! I saw that you had a human design for the Tengu, and I wanted to ask: got any hcs for our bird demon as human? Or just hcs in general, wither will work
Hey! Bro- you won't believe it, but i literally was thinking about Humanized Tengu (for uh- reasons) when I opened tumblr just to see this ask, like deadass??? ad;kjdfdfsa Clearly it was a sign!
But I don't have that many hc about him tbh?? He was a very spontaneous creation for that day, so like here have just some basic info:
the original design i did for ninjavember is kind of how Tengu looked at the prime of his powers in human form, when it/he faced First Ninja.
He is very unnaturally tall, has bone white (practically ashen) skin, with the end of his limbs being dark grey (like literal ash/burned). His body is covered in blue markings like tattoos (very inspired by Law from One Piece haha) and his hair is a mix of feathers and fur-like hair (like birds). He is usually dressed in rich clothes, with his wings acting like sort of cape.
He likes to smoke the pipe ;) its less of actual smoking leaf and more 'energy and fire itself' type of smoking.
He is kind of an asshole, but he greatly (if reluctantly) respects First Ninja because he managed to defeat him and use his powers for his own means. He despises having his powers used by others, but he also kinda respects that it is for a noble cause.
When it comes to Ninjas who came after, he kind of feels like a dad who was forced to take care of kids he never wanted, and those kids literally suck life force out of him, lol.
And that's about all I got for now. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ But thanks for the ask i loved a chance to doodle him ;)
#que?#rc9gn#rc9gn tengu#rc9gn first ninja#listen the analogy of First contracting Tengu into an unwilling 'marriage' for noble cause and basically dumping adopted kids on him later#makes me cackle like a deranged person you dont even know#fun info his hair makes him look like a rooster and it freaks Randy out very much ;)#i actually got an absolutely dumb funny idea about his more modern design but i started laughing so hard that now i cant conceptualize it#into words or arts so. uh i dunno maybe ill post about it later tbd#i literally answered this ask the same day i got it and then i struggled to draw like fr and got distracted and shiet#man im drowning in wips <;D i cri#also i refused to aknowledge that i like to make Ninja deal with a certain type of people ok leave me and my fav tropes alone
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“This is me praying that…
This was the very first page…
…not where the storyline ends.
My thoughts will echo your name…
…until I see you again.”
#star wars#the bad batch#tbb#clone force 99#tbb hunter#tbb omega#tbb wrecker#bad batch#tbb spoilers#the bad batch spoilers#bad batch spoilers#guys I freaking cried so hard#reunited and it feels so good#this was the catharsis I was waiting 3 YEARS for#taylor swift#enchanted taylor's version
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“Right here…
Close to my heart,
you’ve always been here.
Strip everything aw̴̬̻̻̥̻͉̹͜͠a̸̛̲͇̥̝͔͔ý̶̘̹̭͎͔͔͇̟̰̾́̀͜
and the last thing left…
#bakudeku#LISTEN#the dj is ‘the heart next to mine’ and HOW ACCURATE for them?#how did they so accurately describe YEARS AGO what Kacchan was gonna go through???#do you see? DO YOU SEE HOW ROMANTIC HORI MADE THESE CHAPTERS?????#let me tell you when I read this dj I freaking cried at the end... Izuku’s line hit me SO HARD and I realised…#its because we got the reverse in canon... Yeah. its... its alot.#BKDK CANON#Bnha dj#Bnha 360#Bnha 362#Kacchan loves deku#the heart next to mine#the heart next to mine dj#bakudeku dj#op#bnha meta#bnha edit#fave
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KP AU
where everything is the same except Macau and Kim are trans. Kim is FTM but likes to fuck with gender (in true Jeff style). WIK is an open lgbt supporter and supports lgbt youth charities but is not open as trans (cause wik was formed after he had transitioned and he just enjoyed being seen as male and completely forgot to mention that he had been born in the wrong body).
Kim is the mafia son who was a daughter and who’s only future was to be sold into marriage alliances. That would explain so much about Kim’s alienation from his family. He moved out as soon as he could and got everything changed, name, legal identity. He got surgery and testosterone. Tankhurn helped with that. Also he and Macau vibe every so often for complaining sessions. He helped Macau get access to good medical care.
Nothing about the plot changes. Kim completely forgets to tell Chay (he’s so comfortable in himself to see it as a thing that needs brought up). Until one day they’re changing together and Kim pulls his packet from his trousers and Chay goes brain dead. 😂
#kinnporsche#kinnporsche the series#Chay thinks his bf pulled his dick off#Chay freaks out for a good few minutes#Kim finds it all hilarious#Macau laughs so hard he cries#minor and major fam friendships#kimchay#I just want Kim to be a trans chaotic little autistic enby#is that too much to ask
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Good Omens S2 was like the cure for my depression but also the cause for it. That’s a pretty big standard for S3. I have high expectations.
#good omens#good omens 2#good omens 3#good omens season 3#good omens fandom#literally my ambrosia#I cried so freaking hard#my celebrations when s3 was announced#i cried again#the fandom collectively screaming#and wahooing#I went on tumblr and just BOOM GOOD OMENS S3#my whole fyp is just ineffable husbands#not that im complaining
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i wish i had the words to explain what yoongi and his d-day did for my mental health this year. i really wish i had the power to somehow let him know that i related to every word he said in that album and everything he spoke about in his documentary, and that his wisdom and reassurances really pushed me forward like nothing else all these months. ugh i wish.
#bc i was listening to snooze and just every single word hits so hard i can't listen to it without crying#he keeps promising us that he's here to catch us n that we should hold onto our dreams n that there's SOMEONE who lives off our smiles#and then the mantra styled 'everything will be okay' over n over again like a pat on ur head or a soft hug#d-day is truly for all the sad girlies who are trying to get up again.. who are wiping their tears and trying to heal#even the freaking interlude feels like pulling yourself out of your pains and steering towards a better future.. so utopian#and remember what he said at the end of road to d-day? how we can't control the past and future but the present#i cried SO MUCH ISGDHSEHFUFH and ill cry again bc that hit home.. really did#yeah idk i just hope he knows what that album means to us and i hope he knows how much comfort he's able to give#hands down my favourite album this year and truly truly did so much for me seriously#okay that's it
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Replayed Modern Warfare 3 2011 on Veteran tonight and goooooooood night. Blood Brothers never gets any easier to watch no matter how many times you've done it and the ending really never misses huh
I apologize for the amount of yapping in the tags I reread it all on mobile and started giggling because it went on for so long but eh. Blessed are those who won't shut the freak up and all that
#call of duty#modern warfare 3 2011#i just. wow. wow wow wow wow wow#i've played these three games so many times over the last several years and i just.#they literally. never get old.#loose ends and blood brothers will never not make me cry and endgame and dust to dust will never not make me smile so hard#ending it with price smoking the cigar like he did in the first mission in the first game wHEN HE FIRST MET SOAP JUST UGHHHHHH.#i know y'all don't care but i don't care that y'all don't care i could literally yap about this until i shrivel up and die#i have never ever ever in my LIFE seen poetic justice played out so beautifully like it is at the very end#JUST. WOW. WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW. WOW WOW. WOW#they do not frickin make games like that anymore DADGUM#i also forgot how frickin sad down the rabbit hole is?? like jeez louise they didn't have much screen time but gosh#i also have never in my life heard such gut-wrenching anguish from a grown man in my life like price in that one scene#I KNOW Y'ALL KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT THAT MAN MAKES ME FULL ON S O B IN THAT PART HE HAD NO BUSINESS#anyway i'll keep cutely living in denial and pretending literally any of the main characters besides price and nikolai are fine <3#foley and dunn and their team seemed just fine at the end of modern warfare 2 so i will accept that small mercy#at this point these games have taken everything else i love away from me so#y'all probably think i'm wild for how insane i get over these games but the nostalgia bit is a big part of it as well#like they're honestly in my opinion genuinely the greatest video games of all time#but the fact that i have that connection with my dad makes it so special#crazy cause he said he also cried in blood brothers and my dad is 54 and i have seen him cry one (1) other time in my entire life#heck infinity ward but also bless them i hope the devs live long beautiful wonderful prosperous delightful exciting fulfilling lives#Lord bless them and their entire bloodline for the contributions they have made to humanity not even joking#AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THE FREAKING SOUNDTRACKS DO NOT GO THERE OAUSYDJAKAKDN#MW2 AND MW3 CREDITS. EXTRACTION POINT. COUP DE GRACE. RETREAT AND REVEILLE. CONTINGENCY. PARIS SIEGE. PRAGUE HOSTILITIES. RUSSIAN WARFARE.#UGHHHHHHHGHHHH everything about these games is so unbelievably perfect and immaculate#i have got to get over my art block NOWWWWWWWWWW#makarov is also the best villain i've ever seen idc bro he's frickin awesome#i mean obviously he's horrible and a disgustingly evil human being but as a character he's stupidly well-written
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how do people like…. genuinelt scroll through someone’s tumblr? i get super anxious after one scroll and my heart starts pounding and my palms get sweaty and i freak tf out. how do y’all just…. scroll?????????
#/gen#hi todd!#i was trying to show my friend @/ralphingly’ start work#and i couldnt fucking#scroll to show them i freaked out so hard i cried
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#i cried for s solid 4 hours this morning#off and on. at freaking WORK#i legitimately couldn't stop. I'm shocked at how i could pull it together to talk to people#the moment i was alone again i was ugly crying again#my bestie hugged me and i sobbed. i cannot remember the last time i cried that hard#these are feelings I've been trying to avoid for the last decade#feelings of hope#wishing dreaming hoping#smashed every month#you'd think I'd know better jfc#i didn't want to feel this disappointment again. I've been avoiding feeling this way for so long#i don't want to be crushed like this#sigh.#to delete
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Team rancher is so homoerotic to this day..
#guys PLEASE watch jimmy’s hermit x empires episodes#you wont regret it#hermitcraft x empires#empires smp#third life series#team rancher#its so cute they freak out so hard#they miss each other so much#its like theyre married i s2g#THEYRE SO HAPPY#‘my little rancher’#cries
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just watched the brazilian production of matilda the musical and to the surprise of no one i cried. to the surprise of some, 4 times.
#it was soooo good#i love matilda so much#in all its forms#but especially the musical#i went to london when i was 13 and my parents asked me if there was anything i wanted to do and they’d see if they could fit it#and i asked to see matilda the musical in the west end#it was too expensive for the whole family to go to but my mom took me#it was amazing i’ll never forget seeing when i grow up live and just bursting into tears#and now it’s 8 years later and i took my mom (and my aunt) to watch the brazilian production and it was just as great#i cried a few minutes into miracle then in school song for some reason? and then when i grow up of course and finally at the encore#also the set design was insane#the stage was like a circle with big letters spelling matilda…#but when they brought a certain letter upfront and showed its back it made up a different setting like matilda’s room or miss honey’s house#it was so freaking cool like please search pictures#also unrelated but mrs wormwood did a silent bend and snap at some point in the beginning of the show and i laughed so hard#no one else did but it’s okay myra i saw it and i appreciate it#(myra ruiz played mrs wormwood and fabi bang ms honey)#(if these names seem familiar to you it’s cause they’re the incredibly iconic brazilian elphaba and glinda respectively)#my post#matilda#matilda the musical
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HGHDJGNDJGJDJGKSDKMSKKALADMFNJDJKSHDGHJJDKJK
#HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#my dad bought me dazai chuuya fifteen + stormbringer + the entire beast manga for my birthday#i am freaking out so hard#already read fifteen it was SPECTACULAR#it made so much more sense in the novel#i am reading stormbringer rn and by GOD do i love the flags but i'm so fucking glad they died early in#bc i already cried like a baby over albatross thinking he saved doc when doc was already dead#imagine if they'd actually taken the time to flesh out their characters i would have died alongside them if they died like halfway through#ANYWAY YEAH i really really love it#adam is so scrunkly he's already such a blorbo to me#once i finish reading this expect fanart <3#(this was meant to post last night but i had to go to bed before i could rip)
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Funny. I was thinking just yesterday about how it had been awhile (almost a year) since I had a good old fashioned fainting spell. And the last time I had one I didn't even think I was dying like a lot of other times I've had them in the past. Well then last night (tonight? Today?) between 2 and 3 in the morning I went to the bathroom, washed my hands, was thinking "man this feels like so much effort I'm so tired" when I turned around to dry them, and then I realized I was on the floor somehow in the fight of my life with the perception of consciousness again.
#i can't be certain how many times i lost consciousness bc i tried to stay on the floor after that#ive learned the hard way not to try to get up once you're down until you're really sure it's over#it's not just gonna be once. i stay in limbo for well. who knows how long!#literally who knows. not me. i was the one unable to hold onto waking#tales from diana#fainting cw#health cw#luckily. whenever it was i first realized i was fainting i had the instinct to sit on the ground#not comfortably. but when i realized what was happening i noticed i was facing the closet leaning my back on the sink#so i mitigated a possible concussion#last time i had one in the middle of the night like this by myself (5ish years ago) i didn't tell my doctor till my next physical#and she was like 'why didnt you come? you couldve had a concussion' and i was freaked out by that#my head hurts a little but not much so i think injury-wise im probably ok#but i should go to the hospital or something today... now that i know i have hashimoto's disease#im wondering if that was some kind of thyroid attack or smth#and they weren't gonna schedule me to see an endocrinologist till DECEMBER#yeah i cried a little when i woke up this morning about it#im just so sad. i can't stop suffering i can't stop being in pain#ruins everything. i was gonna see my family today#i have so many things i wanna do but i can't even dry my hands in the middle of the night anymore
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the thing with autism right. is i know if i was having a full mental health crisis what i would end up doing is going to the emergency room and being like "hello, my name is (x) birthday (y), um i was hoping to talk to you about potential mental health inpatient care? i'm currently having a mental health crisis and don't think i can be trusted on my own" like if there's one thing i can be sure will live on in me no matter how hard the brainworms try. is my fucking customer service voice
#like itll be busted as fuck because ill be freaking out but you bet ill be sobbing my way through verbally drafting an email#ive done it before‚ like im a frustrated crier and once i start crying i cant turn it off so ive had a couple times where i had a breakdown#at work‚ cried about it a lot‚ and my lead pulled me into a meeting room after i calmed down to check in#and as soon as i started talking it just started again so i had to be like 'sorry th-this is just something m-m-my bod-dy does‚ i-i'm calm#m-mentally but i just c-cant turn this-is off‚ just try to i-ignore HIC it and f-f-focus-s on the w-wwwords‚#(tired of crytyping so just mentally fill it in yourself in everything else i say)#n they offered me more time to chill but im like no really i genuinely am calm‚ i calm down wayyy before my body does its gonna#keep doing this on and off all day‚ it takes hours for it to fully calm down and is on a hair trigger the entire time#so thinking about this will make it kick back up again no matter what unless we talk tomorrow‚ so if youre ok with bearing with me then cool#and theyre like. dang ok and just focused on what i said#or much more recently i was talking to my roommate‚ stopped‚ held up a finger + stood there silently for ten seconds‚#then was like 'sorry about that‚ i think i have to throw up. excuse me for a moment. what was that? oh gotcha yeah i'll message you if i#need anything‚ thank you'#and just typing it out like that it sounds like i was fine and just saw it coming a ways away. however that is not the case#i had had my covid booster and some other vaccine earlier that day‚ lost 5 vials of blood‚ eaten Nothing‚ drank only#acidic-ass apple juice‚ and had just hit my vape too hard#keeping it in once it made its presence known was a feat of will the likes of which have never been seen before#and still my sentences prevail
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Got a month’s prescription of klonopin. Wish I could find out how other people are affected by it, but all I find are posts about getting fucked up. I mean, I guess good for y’all, but not very helpful for me 🤷🏻♂️
#I’m about to take my first one in a bit#been trying to find actual reviews online that aren’t from people just partying#it suuuucks#okay first of the nurse was super sweet and nice BUT I ASKED FOR XANAX#I did NO research on klonopin so now I’m scrambling to build up the courage to take this stuff#I’m sorry. I’m not a big drug user. I’m paranoid about side effects#I just want to feel mellow and not as sad#I know this is for anxiety not depression but my new antidepressants aren’t in yet and I need SOME kind of relief#I kinda just sat and cried and freaked out in the car earlier so… wanna get on this before that hits again#I tried to go for a run this morning.. which… I can’t run. this body sucks and I have bad balance and it just feels bad#so instead I walked around the neighborhood for awhile. it was nice. so pretty.#it rained earlier so it was cool and dewy and peaceful#and I could hear the birds and felt peaceful for awhile#now I’m in this house and it’s OPPRESSIVE!#THIS WORLD IS SHIT PRISON IN ISOLATION GALAXY!#I went to Walgreens earlier and tried to see if I would be able to work in a place like that#trying to hear people talk while wearing hearing aids#it… wasn’t a hopeful trip. depressing. I want a job and to get out so bad#I need cash and I need to be around people#it’s just hard. trying to adjust. trying to see some hope. it’s rough.#I wish I could listen to music but it’s just noise now#and I can’t eat because nothing tastes good. it’s all dry and bland and I know I’m hungry#and being hungry makes my mental state worse but it’s hard to feel the need to eat#blegh whatever. gonna try some ramen and I got a Gatorade for the calories so we’ll see#sorry about the bitching#I appreciate if you actually read all of this#text
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