She looks so fucking good with her hair like this tho

1248

Your ex taps you on the shoulder and says, “I still love you.” You say?  I feel like I’ve answered a similar situation recently, but I would assume it was a drunk text or wrong text, inform them about it, and move on.

Do you play video games?  Nah. I do feel a sort of connection of video games since I grew up surrounded by them, though; but I’m more of a watcher than anything. I like watching playthroughs of video games I’ll never play. Do you spend a lot of time with family?  No. We used to, back when the quarantine was still a relatively new thing – we hung out in the living room all the time. But now that we’ve settled in this new normal, we’re back to our normal routines and I usually like staying in my room.

Is your house more than two stories tall?  Technically, yes. We have a rooftop that serves as the ‘third’ floor.

Have you ever hit your significant other? Has he/she ever hit you?  My ex and I never hit one another; that’s a gigantic red flag even I would notice, considering I ignored most of the ones I saw hahaha.

What makes you an attractive person? (Talk about your personality too!)  I’m not sure if I’ll be able to answer this question directly, but I like my generosity. I’m not sure if I can call it attractive, though. But if we were focusing on physical features, I like my smile.

What color is your hairbrush/comb?  Pink.

What snacks do you have available in your household atm?  My dad splurged on chips in his last grocery run so we actually have quite a lot of junk food in the pantry at the moment. He also bought several packs of cookie sandwiches, wafers, sunflower seeds, and garlic-flavored peanuts.

Has anyone recently told you that they like you, or find you attractive?  Neither.

Are you attracted to the last person you Facebook messaged?  No, she’s just a good friend of mine.

Do you care about anyone that doesn’t care about you?  I guess I don’t, because I’m not even aware of them.

Was your last Facebook friend requests from a male or female?  Guy. It was another reporter, so I just ignored it and luckily he didn’t PM me just to ask to add him back, which others have already done. I really hate when work people try to make their way into my personal accounts.

Which one of your relatives is most likely to embarrass you?  My parents, especially when they are rude to service crew. Gen X-ers are impeccably talented at that, apparently.

When was the last time you ate a bar of chocolate?  Around two or three weeks ago when I had dinner at Angela’s. Her dad gave me a bar of Crunch so I can have something sweet after our meal.

Do you play any games on Facebook?  No, I never did hop on that trend.

What would you like to get a degree in?  I wanted a degree in journalism, and graduated with such. At the end of my college stint I didn’t want to pursue it anymore, but I pushed through with it anyway because it was too much of a hassle to shift and start all over.

Do you wake up a lot in the middle of the night? Technically not, because I stay up until the middle of the night anyway. It’s been a while since I fell asleep anywhere between 8 to 10 PM.

Would you prefer to read a book, watch a movie or TV show, or play a video game?  Watch a show.

Do you usually get popcorn or soda at the movie theater?  I don’t like either; I get fries instead.

What genre of films do you like the best?  Drama.

How many bank accounts do you have?  Two but I haven’t been using the other one in months. That was the bank account I initially opened when I first started ~adulting~ but when I got employed I was required to enroll in this other specific bank, so that’s what I mainly use now.

Have you ever had the flu?  Not really. I just get the occasional fever that pop out of nowhere.

What is your goal for the next few months?  Start saving FOR REAL, and also prioritizing furniture over merch for a while so I can finally fix up my room, which is quickly starting to look and feel like just a warehouse and not very homey at all.

Have you ever had some kind of sleep-disorder? How did it affect your life?  Nope.

Have you ever had food poisoning before? Describe the experience.  Yeah, it was from barbecue that apparently went bad, even though it tasted nothing of the sort. I woke up at 3 AM sweating profusely and with the most excruciating stomachache; I was feeling hot, cold, and nauseous all at the same time, and it probably lasted for like an hour or so.

What are two things that you have no problem paying full price for?  Sealed albums and my pets’ vet expenses.

Funny, charming, cute, romantic, smart - choose only 2 for the opposite sex.  Charming and smart.

Have you ever let somebody use you? Why did you do it?  It felt nice to help people.

You can go back in time & change something in your mom’s past - what is it? Good question; I’ve never encountered this before. I would let her live a more comfortable, privileged life, where she didn’t have to staple her shoes to keep them closed or have to choose between eating at a fast food restaurant or being able to commute back home.

Do you know anybody who is around the exact same size as you? Who? I’m not sure, actually. Everyone’s always slightly taller than me.

Ever been to a haunted house? How scared were you?  I haven’t.

Been on any websites today you wouldn’t want your parents to see?  Tumblr, I guess? My survey blog isn’t for any irls to see.

Which is worse: dusting or mopping?  I don’t really do either often, but I’ll go with mopping.

Would you marry somebody who was intensely religious?  Not for me.

Did you pull a senior prank?  No, that’s not a thing here. Did you graduate?  Yeah, elementary, high school, and college.

Have you ever been unfaithful in a serious relationship?  Nope.

What was the last song you listened to?  It’s a song called Epiphany.

Are you one of those lucky people with 20/20 vision?  Not ever since I was like 9 lol.

Is fashion one of your interests?  I’m way more interested in it now for sure, mostly because the celebrities I’m into these days put a lot of effort when it comes to their style; so it makes me more aware of the trends that come and go, as well.

Do you think you’ll eventually find that special someone?  I’m keeping it as a possibility, but it’s not a priority for me now.

Do you care what people think?  To an extent, I would say. My life doesn’t depend on it, though.

Is acting something you enjoy?  Never been.

What was the last thing you broke/sprained?  Do you mean a thing or a body part? Anyway, I’ll answer both. The last thing I broke was my BTS Mic Drop pen of V looooooooooool the figurine came off the pen :(( It was pretty cheap though so I’m fine with it; I can always get another one. Last body part I sprained was my ankle, when I had a bad fall a couple of years ago.

Have you ever fought with a friend because of their boyfriend/girlfriend? Because of yours?  Either hasn’t happened.

Has a stranger ever yelled at you for your language?  I don’t think so.

Whose house, other than yours and your families', are you most comfortable at?  Angela’s. Also JM’s, just because their family doesn’t hover and that vibe can sometimes be nice whenever I’m at someone else’s place.

Has any of your friends’ family ever yelled at you?  Never.

Did you ever play a sport as a little kid? Did you enjoy it? Not as a very young kid, but I took up table tennis starting when I was 12. Did you ever watch the show Full House?  Nope.

Is there a celebrity you are just DETERMINED to marry?  Now that’s just delusional haha. I’m pretty obsessed with some celebrities, that much I can admit; but thinking of them in the context of marriage is so many steps overboard.

Have you ever burned someone’s picture?  No. I could, but I am scared of fire and will probably just think of other ways to express my anger, like tearing up the photograph. What’s the longest hike you’ve ever been on?  Total length was probably like 3 hours. I haven’t gone too far when it comes to hiking.

Would you ever get a lip tattoo?  Not interested.

Who is the first person of the opposite sex that pops into your head? Hans.

Do your parents smoke cigarettes?  My mom tried it once in her life, I think. My dad has never smoked.

What does one of your T-shirts have written on it?  “Hope right here!”

Name a pet you definitely wouldn’t want.  Anything that’s supposed to roam freely in the wild, like squirrels.

Would you prefer your partner smaller or taller?  Taller, since I’m already quite pint-sized to begin with lol.

Do you enjoy going through old pictures? Sometimes. Other times, it's too painful. It also depends on the era of the pictures. < Agree, especially with the eras. Childhood photos are always fun to look at, but I have had to delete a CHUNK of photos from years ranging from 2014 to 2020 because I’ve lost a handful of friends from that period.

Do you believe people when they say they don’t judge people?  It’s hard to for the most part, but I’ve noticed very few people people really don’t. Most of the time it’s bullshit though.

What did you love the most about the town you grew up in?  That it’s pretty close to the metro.

What’s a movie that you laughed the hardest during?  Hmm, I prefer TV shows if I’m craving comedy.

What’s a movie you cried the hardest during?  Life Is Beautiful.

What’s your favorite restaurant?  Omakase for my sushi fix; School Tteokbokki if I want Korean; Yabu if I’m looking for a generous rice meal.

Is there a dessert you don’t like?  Anything with fruits.

Favorite album?  After Laughter by Paramore.

What’s a book that you read because everyone else was reading it?  I can name authors instead of books – John Green and Haruki Murakami.

Underwater or outer space?  Outer space.

Dogs or cats?  Dogs.

Kittens or puppies?  Puppies.

Bird watching or whale watching?  Whale watching. I don’t get to be in the water as much, so I would jump at the opportunity.

What is your spirit animal?  I dunno if I have one but let’s just go with dog and elephant, I guess? They’re my favorites.

What was your best subject in school?  History.

What was your worst subject in school?  Chemistry.

What is one thing you wish you knew in high school?  Don’t waste your time.

Who is your fashion icon?  Audrey Hepburn.

Diamonds or pearls?  Diamonds.

What color dress did you wear to prom?  For my own prom it was cream-colored/beige. When I went to Mike’s ball, I went with a royal blue gown.

What’s your favorite plot-twist?  I don’t think I’ve found my favorite yet.

Honestly, are you jealous of someone right now?  Not actively.

Honestly, what’s the worst thing you’ve done when you were mad?  I dunno...road rage, maybe?

Honestly, ever made anyone cry when you were mad?  It’s very likely.

Honestly, when was the last time you REALLY cried your heart out?  Sometime in the last week.

Ever pop someone else’s pimple? No thanks.

Do you need to return anyone’s phone call?  Nope.

Who are you closest to?  Angela.

Have you ever had a bad concert experience?  No, all the ones I’ve been to have been amazing experiences.

Are you currently sad about anything?  Not really. I can’t complain.

Have you had any form of exercise today?  Nah.

Can you handle blood?  Nope, I will feel faint if I see it 100%.

Has any place hired you underage for a job?  No.

Have you ever carried a concealed weapon?  I haven’t.

Are you currently searching for a job?  No, I like the one I have.

Does eating breakfast make you sick?  No?

Your ex taps you on the shoulder and says, “I still love you.” You say? ooooof. I don’t think i’d buy that. I hardly think people who DO show they have feelings for me are being truthful, so I doubt that.

Do you play video games? haven’t in some time, but I want to get back into it a little.

Do you spend a lot of time with family? oh heck yeah. I have a really great family.

Is your house more than two stories tall? nah, it’s the two stories with a basement.

Have you ever hit your significant other? Has he/she ever hit you? I will never raise my hands to another human being. I once dated someone who was a veteran and had severe ptsd. we were napping one time and he got aggressive. that wasn’t HIM though. 

What makes you an attractive person? (Talk about your personality too!) physically, I suppose I have nice eyes and a decent smile. personality wise, I am warm, friendly, loving, supportive, sometimes funny, very loyal.

What color is your hairbrush/comb? depends which one I use. I have a pink one right now. 

What snacks do you have available in your household atm? I honestly haven’t got a clue. I haven’t been let out of my room in 2 weeks.

Has anyone recently told you that they like you, or find you attractive? yes. it’s weird.

Are you attracted to the last person you Facebook messaged? DEF not. he has been asking me out since we worked together maybeeeee.. 8-9 years ago? 

Do you care about anyone that doesn’t care about you? yes! I am trying to learn how to undo that. it’s not that I don’t want to care about him, but I know and can soooooooo clearly see that he doesn’t care anymore, and it is extremely emotionally draining to watch.

Was your last Facebook friend requests from a male or female? I wanna say female but idk

Which one of your relatives is most likely to embarrass you? scott

When was the last time you ate a bar of chocolate? couple days ago.

Do you play any games on Facebook? Nope.

What would you like to get a degree in? I have two degrees -- one in psych and one in SLP. 

Do you wake up a lot in the middle of the night? ahahahaha yes. almost always wide awake from 3-6

Would you prefer to read a book, watch a movie or TV show, or play a video game? typically more in the movie/show or book mood.

Do you usually get popcorn or soda at the movie theater? Both. nothing like that buttery, salty goodness that obvs requires an enormous drink

What genre of films do you like the best? either make me EXTREMELY sad, or romantic.

How many bank accounts do you have? 2

Have you ever had the flu? Yeah.

What is your goal for the next few months? i have several. the only one that can/will be public right now, is to get my lungs back to functioning as they were.

Have you ever had some kind of sleep-disorder? How did it affect your life? yes. I have very bad breathing during sleep. I have had 11 sleep studies done, because my breathing will just stop randomly, which luckily my brain wakes me. it doesn’t really affect my like severely.. I function normally. but shoooooot, if I got normal levels of sleep i’d be a force to be reckoned with.

Have you ever had food poisoning before? Describe the experience. Yes. It was AWFUL. vomiting for 2 days straight. it was so gross.

Funny, charming, cute, romantic, smart - choose only 2 for the opposite sex. smart and romantic.

Have you ever let somebody use you? Why did you do it? hmm. I think there have been times where i’ve let people have more access to me than they should have had. or there have definitely been times I’ve been used in school groups. But honestly, I tend to be protective of myself. I stop when I feel enough is enough. 

You can go back in time & change something in your mom’s past - what is it? I would want either Bill to not die, or for her to be spoiled incessantly by someone else.

Do you know anybody who is around the exact same size as you? Who? psh. no. my friends are all tiny which is just not fun.

Ever been to a haunted house? How scared were you? Yeah. i found it so fun.

Been on any websites today you wouldn’t want your parents to see? ahahahaha no. 

Which is worse: dusting or mopping? mopping. i hate doing the floors.

Did you pull a senior prank? Not really advised when a homeschooler. 

Did you graduate? Yes. that was a rough, rough day.

Have you ever been unfaithful in a serious relationship? Nope

What was the last song you listened to? i think it was Happier than Ever by billie eilish. the lyrics are ... woof. 

Are you one of those lucky people with 20/20 vision? 20/12 -- the last time I had insurance anyway.

Is fashion one of your interests? honestly, if I had money, it would be. but it isnt right now.

Do you think you’ll eventually find that special someone? It’s getting harder and harder to believe that will be the case. I knowwwww I need to start dating, but every time I go to open up an app, I hesitate and chicken out. I just was so happy before.. its hard to think I could be able to offer anything to anyone right now.

Do you care what people think? veryyyyyy few people. I care about the thoughts of those I genuinely love and respect. However, I still ensure I’m protecting myself regardless.

Is acting something you enjoy? No. 

What was the last thing you broke/sprained? I have a bum knee, so I sprain that from time to time. I last broke a finger.

Have you ever fought with a friend because of their boyfriend/girlfriend? Because of yours? ahahahaha yes. but years ago. never because of mine.

Has a stranger ever yelled at you for your language? No. I don’t cuss. 

Whose house, other than yours and your families’, are you most comfortable at? probably either nathan’s or em’s.

Has any of your friends’ family ever yelled at you? alix’s family used to yell at me a lot for being fat. that used to mess me up. 

Did you ever play a sport as a little kid? Did you enjoy it? soccer. no, i found the endless running to be unnecessary. 

Did you ever watch the show Full House? yup

Is there a celebrity you are just DETERMINED to marry? no, thats so out-of-touch with reality

Have you ever burned someone’s picture? yes, i have.

What’s the longest hike you’ve ever been on? i think it was 8 hours. I hate hate hate hikes. But, thats because I have really weak lungs, so my doctor says it’s like lighting them on fire.

Would you ever get a lip tattoo? No.

Who is the first person of the opposite sex that pops into your head? kile

Do your parents smoke cigarettes? my mom hasn’t since a teenager. I think my dad does still. though, i dunno for certain.

What does one of your T-shirts have written on it? uhhhh, PTK honors society

Name a pet you definitely wouldn’t want. Any reptile or insect. <<<< same

Would you prefer your partner smaller or taller? Taller. 

Do you enjoy going through old pictures? Yes. very much so.

Do you believe people when they say they don’t judge people? No, i respect people who are truthful saying they either try not to judge, or that they do judge despite their desire to stop.

What did you love the most about the town you grew up in? sooooooo much. it’s small town-y, quiet, safe, lots of trees, family close by.

What’s a movie you cried the hardest during? ps i love you will always shatter my heart.

What’s your favorite restaurant? buona or ashford

Is there a dessert you don’t like? im not wild about pastries.

What’s a book that you read because everyone else was reading it? hmmm maybe that one mrs. pettigrews home for peculiar children.

Underwater or outer space? i’m fascinated by both. typically more interested in the water.

Dogs or cats? both. all of them.

Kittens or puppies? kittens.

Bird watching or whale watching? whales!!!!!!!!

What was your best subject in school? in HS probably history. or science. in college, psych or neuro.

What was your worst subject in school? Math. always freakin’ math.

What is one thing you wish you knew in high school? Uhhh. hm. i don’t think anything. I liked my experience.

Who is your fashion icon? nada.

Diamonds or pearls? Both are nice. I love pearl stud earrings and I really want a simple, one pearl necklace. I am kinda ruined for diamonds for some time. My favorite rings and necklace were diamonds from kile and I just cant bring myself to wear those anymore.

What color dress did you wear to prom? pink

Honestly, are you jealous of someone right now? oh sure. I am envious of those with bangin’ bods. I’m envious of those who have great finances. I am envious of those who live life married to their love. I’m envious of people who see kile regularly. But there are difficulties that come with any of those situations.

Honestly, when was the last time you REALLY cried your heart out? not long ago. the whole crushing reality of losing kile just destroyed me. I’m OK now.

Do you need to return anyone’s phone call? ahahahahah. I just reject all calls.

Who are you closest to? My mom and nathan rn.

Have you ever had a bad concert experience? no

Are you currently sad about anything? several things have recently been really saddening, but I’m ok. Ill get thru it.

Have you had any form of exercise today? Its going to be some time before I’m cleared for that. I almost faint from taking a shower and I have to be on oxygen after doing the one flight of stairs. 

Can you handle blood? doesn’t bother me at all.

Has any place hired you underage for a job? yes. I mean technically, I was legal to work in that I was 17, but the company didn’t want to hire younger than 18.

Have you ever carried a concealed weapon? not like in public, but at a house or gun range, yes.

Are you currently searching for a job? soon.

Does eating breakfast make you sick? i’m never ever ever hungry for it. I know i should, but its the worst. I don’t even like breakfast foods.

HE(ART) • Victuuri

Prelude

Victor Nikivorov x Katsuki Yuuri

Parallel universe AU

Belief.

Ignorance is a bliss and a bitch, a generally popular universal truth, but hey, if that bitch has aided you to slap a quarter of your life with a big bold try me placard by your inner self-uplifter and has made you immune to this oh-so-evil humankind, you would believe the power of ignorance is not just a bliss but a fucking blessing. Unfortunately which, it seems only a chosen few possess.

Hence by laws of the hypothetically giving-a-fuck universe, Katsuki Yuuri just so happens to be one of the few elites. Though his ability is not that of intentional ignorance but plain old oblivion.

At the most recent occasion—that is right now—his ignorance can also be replaced with the fact that he’s running so he doesn’t really have much fuck to give to peers turning around from all directions to look at him.

And while that on a calmer day might reassure his questionable fashion choices, today he knows, he knows he smells dangerous enough to cause an epidemic merely by existing.

 You see it was not his fault that his naïve (motherfucking) juniors tried moving an entire rack of chemicals that had just so happened to consist of all variants of Thioacetone.

Of course, the idea couldn't be any worse and by the end of screams, flailings, glass breakings, and trickling of the solutions to any and every corner of the room the lab had come to smell like diarrhea at a super level. He hates college.

After picking his nails while half-heartedly listening to the threats and scolding the ultimate seniors (those crazy Einstein-haired Ph.D. ones) had given to those juniors (who resembled a group of terrified hamsters by then), he reckoned it okay for him to slip out quietly.

He’s sneaky, sue him.

 Cue his professor’s email.

 He has special ding-ring-ring! notification in his baby to clearly inform him of the demise he acquires from his soul-suckers every now and then. Not that he doesn’t like his professors (he loves and respects them thank you very much), it’s just he’s so tired. Almost fourth year into college and he has given up on his personal and social life.

He has even forgotten the last time he masturbated. Rimming his textbooks (plus internet), mating his chemicals and blowing his assignments are on the verge of making him question his sexuality. But then he remembers, how he has always known what he was signing up for all those years back.

 And if he wants to reach the finale, he gotta ace this final. And if he wants to ace the final, submitting his paper on Organic synthesis via Enolates before midnight is a nice starting point.

So he continues to torture his suppressed Usain Bolt gene while eloquently cursing his very respectable prof to be traditional as fuck and not utilize the normal idea of e-mailing.

For the total amount of time and energy his legs have flown him by, he thinks he deserves to be all the way across Iceland, instead, he makes peace with reality whilst reaching the dorms. He’s humble, you’re welcome.

One day, one day, he’s going to go on strike and petition to the admins for a goddamn lift. He has no care about learning to be punctual or money which he knows they won’t have any problem with; he and he’s sure every single living creature in college needs one elevator in their dorms just as badly as Romeo might have all those years back.

But he'll think about it later when his whole third year is not on the line. He needs to get to the most crucial year and graduate the fuck out of this hellhole.

 The stairs squeezed out whatever hope was left within his knees until he’s left banging on the door akin to a lunatic with both of his hands. It’s a bad day—the chronicle since this sunny morning is proof enough—so he wasn’t surprised when halfway through his journey he had realized his dorm keys have been forgotten in his lab coat. Why he had even bothered to flick it out of his bag he doesn’t know but life is all about learning through mistakes so.

He can hear the shrill tone of his platonic soulmate/roommate shouting Who the fuck is this?! from inside but he’s too breathless to answer. The door snaps open only seconds later revealing a fuming owner of three hamsters that are perched on different heights of his body.

The person’s expression morphs into that of confusion then concern then suspicion then understanding and lastly deadpan. Yuuri flings his body on the said hamster-father who accepts him with a squeak and almost imbalance.

Subsequently closing the door and carrying the skeleton, Phichit Chulanot has once again proved himself to be The Best Friend™, something he’s going to rub on Yuuri’s face later.

 As soon as Phichit sits both of them down on their excuse of a couch, Yuuri shoots up hitting Phichit’s jaw in the process.

“You—,”

“Later Chu!” he cuts the upcoming verbal splash fast and sprints inside his room, snatches the file and he’s out the door screaming bye. He loves Phichit for not barbequing him or offering him up to an asylum and staying by his side loyally.

He has been honestly touched since the time Phichit got so used to unearthly smells on his body that he doesn’t even ask or get mildly uncomfortable now, and readily accepts hugs and cuddles from the human equivalent of a drain. He could never thank the universe enough.

He could faintly hear his platonic soulmate’s voice above his head so he looks up while continuing to dash down the stairs and finds Phichit leaning dangerously down the railing of their floor and shouting something he can’t really make sense of.

 “What?!” shouts Yuuri, faltering a little in his pace.

“I said come back home at human hours we gotta be somewhere tonight!” yells back Phichit.

Not again.

“Ugh I’ll try!” he huffs out, almost slipping on the latest step.

“Bitch I’m going to murder you if you don’t get your nasty ass inside before nine it’s important!” screeches Phichit.

“I’ll hecking try I promise!”

“Yuuri it’s really important I have people you need to meet!”

“And I have a year I need to pass I’ll try my absolute best Chi, have faith!” yells back Yuuri and jumps over the last three steps hurrying out the building screaming outta ma way! to everyone around.

 Then, he runs.

 Their campus is a beautiful place with all the ponds and cherry blossoms that bloom at this point of the year. There are a few benches scattered around along with some intricately designed bushes and trees beaming at him from wherever eyes could reach.

Though the inside of their college buildings are technologically advanced, the outer environment gives off an early Japanese town vibe. He isn’t shy to admit his practice of favoritism regarding one particular pond and cherry blossom tree on his way to the library (where his professor probably is doing his own research).

His lungs are quite significantly burning from whatever the fuck adrenaline did to his conscience but he is one obdurate masochist so his voluntary muscles abide by his brain. His throat is all dried up and his breath keeps getting caught, he doesn’t understand why he is torturing himself this way but then a voice in his head answers he doesn’t have enough money to repeat a year so.

At one point his vision blurs but he supposes it’s because of his lack of sleep. Well, he is pretty exhausted.

Nearing the pleasant scenery, naturally, he glances towards his favorite chilling spot but what he sees effectively makes him stop.

 The cherry blossoms, which were supposed to be all fresh and full and thick and brimming with life… is barren. Not a single petal could be seen even beneath the tree, only the desolate brown of winding branches doing little to nothing in shading the newly painted bench underneath it.

It’s detached, the way the bare tree and the empty bench overlook the clear water of the small pond in front; it’s so cold, so lonely, it has never been lonely around it.

A breeze blows by, weakly stroking the skin of his neck and fingers that are exposed. He shivers; it's cold.

It’s spring. He wonders if temperatures can drop so much in the afternoon because he definitely remembers the morning to be all warm and sunny and most importantly, he remembers seeing the tree, the full-thick-jovial tree only yesterday on his way to class.

He, on every molecular level, doesn’t know how what he is seeing right now is even possible. Surely he shouldn’t be the only one right?

His eyes rake over the students running or just walking by around him but none of them look mildly uncomfortable with this situation. He wonders if there has been an experiment or an artificial situation that caused his pretty little blossoms to leave without a farewell.

He wouldn't be surprised if it is so, after all, what he learns on a daily basis about the expertise of this century, he’s sure if there’s something other than criticism that doesn’t faze him anymore, it’s human intelligence. His only discomfort is how and why he hasn’t heard about it of all people.

  There is a buzz on his upper thigh through the thin fabric of his ash-colored pajamas. He slips out his phone and stares at the notification of a text from his classmate informing him of his presence being required asap in the library.

Yuuri mutters a shit and pockets the phone, breathing in to keep the formation of lactic acid at a bare minimum for the rest of his way. He peeks back one last time at his beloved, ready to depart, but once again what he sees effectively freezes him.

 Because they’re full. The fucking cherry blossoms are full.

Yuuri opens and closes his mouth like a fish in the middle of the street to try and explain whatever happened just now to himself.

He fails.

He’s about to start pointing accusingly at the tree to every passerby and shout in their face if they too saw what he did but surprisingly stops himself before making another rash decision in his life.

He keeps standing quietly before he decides that yes he needs to go sleep before he goes mad for real and maybe get his eyesight checked as well.

He turns around, shakes his head to pull himself out from whatever trance he is in and notes to allow himself to rest. As he has only this assignment to submit, he doesn't think anything can stop him from going dead this weekend, so he pushes himself one last time and promises himself a while of tranquility later.

 But this time, he jogs.

 Jogs are quite neat, rhythmic and luckily good for health—he will say if you ask him. Considering the number of times he has jogged to reach his lecture halls or played around with Phichit, he can probably say it’s what that has kept him from wilting away like the autumn leaves after inhaling those oil and grease that comes with the college life.  

If we ignore the biologically healthy benefits of the kind, he appreciates jogs much more because of his bestie, as all things considered, these are the only moments when they both could goof and run around like they're meant to do without having the weight of both their majors hovering over them like a depressing gray cloud. Phichit misses him, he knows. But Yuuri will go down arguing he misses him more and he rarely lies.

  Yuuri stares at the ceiling mutely, a pencil flicking in his hand every now and then.

Phichit glances at him just as quietly while continuing his essay on medieval era music from where he’s sprawled on Yuuri’s bed.

He takes a quick peek at the ceiling then at Yuuri then at the ceiling and then Yuuri. He sums up nothing.

“What are you thinking about? Don’t you have a test tomorrow?”

Yuuri’s gaze doesn’t waver. The pencil between his fingers stops spinning.

“Us.”

 Phichit snorts. “You fell in love with me?”

“No, I have standards,” Yuuri replies seriously (“Hey—”) “I just—don’t you sometimes think we were meant to meet, meant to be best friends—be together till now and years to come—and even if we weren’t, we were meant to die together as complete strangers—if that would’ve gone off—as an apology or like, a tribute from the universe for the friendship that we have today that wouldn’t have existed then.

Like there’s this fate, which decides everything for everyone and time which, like you are to me, is the same to fate and both map and plan out everything for everyone from their beginning till end and all the coincidences in between. People say all those quotes about how we write our own fate but in reality, we don’t write shit.

Time makes us do what we do and fate then gives us whatever our actions have earned—good or bad. We both earned to meet each other—time pushed us to the right point and fate just did its magic in return.

They always leave a door open for what-ifs to be guesstimated; they give us doors to go through—most of the time they pull through whichever door we eventually stand across and sometimes they push ’cause they need to. We were pushed Phichit—we were pushed in that lake together to drown—we were pushed to be saved and then, we were pulled to be friends, slowly, at our own pace.

But what if we would have drowned? What if you wouldn’t have jumped in naively to save me when you didn’t know a cent about swimming? What if it had gotten too late? What if the ambulance had got caught up? What if the doctors failed to push out the water from our lungs? What if we had died, together?

They tend to leave these what-ifs a lot so we reflect. We reflect and either we grow better or worse, unlike itself.  The universe is so stable, isn't it? With all the dark matter and the little white ones in it—quite like human personality yet it’s us who keep changing; we’re irregular, varying.

Besides that, I wonder if any more pushes are left, any more pushes to land me somewhere crucial yet, because at this point I think I’ve utilized all my pulls. Don’t you, Chi? Don’t you think about the universe?”

 Yuuri stares back at Phichit who has gone silent.

Yuuri raises a brow; Phichit closes his mouth.

 “Exactly what’s going on in that head of yours? Yuuri are you… are you okay? Why are you talking like this? Just half an hour ago we were having a debate on Teletubbies—you—what, why?” Phichit asks in disbelief.

 Yuuri rolls his eyes.

“Just because.”

 Phichit looks like he is about to go big bro mode and ask whatever the hell he meant just now but he cannot find a head or tail of how to begin so he shuts up and heaves a breath aggressively.

 “We must, shouldn’t we? we’re not even at quarter to our lives. There must still be something, something big, something extravagant—something that push worthy. They should’ve planned it by now. Fate must be waiting; time is slow. Will you be ready for another ‘Kimi no Na wa’-level change in your life?” Yuuri wiggles his eyebrows.

Phichit sighs and decides to go along even though he’s still one hundred percent blank.

“I’ll learn if not,”

 "Hmm… we always do I guess.”

   Yuuri pushes the door slowly that opens with a haunted creak, the sound pretty much deafening in what it seems a deserted library if not for the clear clicks of keyboard keys from somewhere deep inside. He closes the door as silently as he can with the inevitable old wood creaks.

His slippers tap loudly on the polished marble of fused colors whilst he tries to follow the echo of keys. The library feels odd, this being the first time for him witnessing it so solitary, bleak. He wonders if the students are hidden in corners for their own space. His eyes scan through the shelves to search for anyone, or preferably his teacher. He passes by an aisle quickly noticing motion from his peripheral vision before he backtracks.

There sits his teacher, typing away on his laptop with as much concentration as he narrates his golden days during a substitute class. The volume and number of books sprawled across the table is no joke. Yuuri knows he doesn't want Ph.D. and definitely not Research but the scenes of pure mental torture still cultivates a shudder within him.

 He clears his throat. He is ignored.

He sighs and makes way to his teacher’s chair.

“Sir?” he knocks on the table. His professor flinches hard at the interruption.

“Oh… oh you. Don’t scare an old man that way, you imbecile,” he huffs.

Yuuri ignores the comment (he’s used to it) and retrieves the file from his bag.

“Here, sir. By the way, did you ask for me?” he places the file beside a book lying open.

“Oh yes, yes. I need your help young man. I hope it’s not a bother,” he gives Yuuri a quick look and goes back to typing.

“Sure, no problem,” there goes my tranquility, “What for, if I may ask?”

“Thank you very much Yuuri, it’s really appreciated. You just have to type the rest of this document from this paper I have already written and save it. You can leave after that, just shoot me a quick text,”

“Are you leaving Professor Cialdini?”

"Oh yes. I have a meeting with the other professors in the Science department that I couldn't miss for my life. It’s about you lot after all,” the professor teases, “And I need to get this shithead done and published before I die. I refuse to leave earth without doing it so I’ll be very thankful if you just type out the last page. You’re the most reliable regarding this affair, although a little inelegant but it’s just typing and I couldn’t choose anyone else.”

 Was that a compliment or insult?

“So I’ll be leaving the rest to you,” his professor pats his shoulder to which he offers his trademark smile and nods.

Professor Cialdini takes his file and disappears around the shelf, the echo of his boots fading. Yuuri heaves a long, long sigh and hopes the writing on this one page is at least eligible. He shrugs off his bag and pushes the chair back to sit down following the faint sound of the door closing.

He checks the page closely from where he’s been told to copy and cracks his knuckles. His professor’s handwriting is shit as expected. Floating his fingers above the keys, his elbow knocks out the spectacles case his professor must have forgotten about. He presses his lips in judgment.

  He bends down, folding his body, to retrieve the case and lean back up after getting a hold. Except in the process, his head hits brutally at the table’s edge and he groans, immediately messaging the throbbing area. He tries opening his eyes but everything surprisingly goes into a blur for such a simple hit, it’s as if the blur from a while ago has increased tenfold.

His head hurts not only from the impact but the sides and all over, his head pounds. He senses a feeling similar to being clogged by water. He feels as if he is drowning all over again the way he had those years ago. He can’t speak and his throat indulges to emit only whimpers which are way too cryptic and way too hushed.

He is practically thrashing around in his seat causing the chair to go off-balance several times yet his legs can't find any stored glucose to provide for the use of them.

 There’s a shrill sharp beak of sound in his ears which is raucous and increases the hurting of his skull intensively. He wants to shout but he can’t. He bangs his head down on the keyboard, holding it and tugging his hair roughly. He feels so, so exhausted. Grey dots in a vast plain of blackness keep appearing without fail and it is probably what he sees, feels before his body gives up in place of his fortitude.

End prelude.

Charming Instruction

Part of The Untamed - EXO Wolf Universe

Genre: Supernatural, Wolf Au

Pairing: Junmyeon x Reader

Summary: You were just an average, everyday college student desperately trying to graduate. Only one more year stood between you and that celebratory walk. However, due to an oversight by your adviser, it seemed that the one class you never wanted to take was required to take that walk. It wasn’t the subject matter that made you uncomfortable. It was the teacher. Your heart sped up every time you saw him and you didn’t want that distraction in your life, attractive or not. With meeting him now an inevitability, you swore that you would keep your hormones in check. But after your first day of class, a series of hi jinks and weird situations lead you to discovering the secret of your professor and why he seemed to bombard your every thought.

Part: 1 I 2 I 3 I 4 I 5 I 6 I 7 I 8 I 9 I 10 I 11 I 12 I 13 I Final

**

No, no, no, no, this could not be happening to you.

For the last month, you’d carefully planned this day. It was the first day of your last year of college. You’d picked out the outfit - fully aware that within two weeks you’d throw all cares of your looks and clothes out the window - and meticulously scheduled your day to be able to start off your year right. And you needed this year to go as smoothly as possible. As a senior, these last two semesters were the most important of your life. Three previous years of hard work could go down the drain if you didn’t keep your focus.

Okay, you could still probably graduate, but you wanted all the honors that came with graduating with top grades. And you wanted to make your parents proud. And you needed the good GPA in order to get a good internship or entry job after graduation.

When you’d sat down with your advised a few months previous to go over your schedule for the upcoming school year, you’d been itching with excitement. The classes that awaited you weren’t too difficult, but they would definitely be challenging and require your absolute attention. Which – given your past history – shouldn’t have been a problem.

Until the ultimate bombshell was dropped by your adviser.

You wanted to be an archaeologist. Someday. For now, you were settling for field assistant because you didn’t want to spend any more years sitting in a classroom reading about great finds when you could be a part of them. You didn’t care if your name was just a footnote about the people who were present in the digs, you just wanted to experience the thrill of finding evidence of an ancient civilization.

But to even get that far, you needed to graduate college. To graduate college in your specific field, you needed to check off all required classes. And you thought you had.

One little folklore class, one little elective that you had once been told was only an option and one you didn’t have to take, had snuck by you. When your adviser explained to you that there must have been some misunderstanding and that this class was in fact a required credit in order for you to complete your degree, your stomach had dropped. It was like your worst nightmare coming true. Not quite that dramatic, but close enough.

It wasn’t the subject matter that made you want to avoid the class. Actually, you found it somewhat intriguing considering how myths and old lore helped shaped the old world and influence their everyday lives. As someone who wanted to keep their focus on ancient civilizations, it probably would be a good class to have under your belt.

If only it was taught by someone else.

There was nothing wrong with Professor Kim. Maybe that was the issue. He was too… perfect. From the way he styled his hair to the glasses perched on his nose to the button-downs and slacks he wore for lectures.

It was your sophomore year of college that you first laid eyes on him. He was a brand new professor and the talk of the campus. Every other teacher on campus looked like the average college professor who was typically much older than the student population and usually had the fashion sense of two decades ago. Not to mention, most of them weren’t as fit or well put together. But when you walked out of the library with your two best friends, you realized that all of the gossip about the latest addition to the university staff was more than just talk and he was nothing like the average professor.

He was standing profile from you at over fifty feet away talking to other teachers, but your glasses helped you focus enough to be able to see his face. And your heart nearly leapt out of your chest and ran in his direction at full speed.

You were so enamored by his too-classic looks that you tripped over your own feet and nearly took Gemma down to the ground with you. In your embarrassment, you took off with Gemma and Cam, your two best friends, on your heels, calling out for an explanation. When you finally came to a stop, you huffed out what they wanted to know. Of course, they just laughed at you and your innocence when it came to attraction of the opposite sex.

After your disastrous freshman year relationship of seven months, you’d sworn off relationships and had never even given the thought of dating a chance since, too focused on your career goals to entertain the idea. Besides, you didn’t exactly know how to interact with them anyway. Sure, you’d had guy friends in the past, but that was different. You weren’t attracted to them. Maybe you just weren’t built for it. You were too awkward and didn’t exactly have the “street smarts” to navigate that world.

It was probably for the best. You never really found anyone that gave you butterflies or made you blush, anyway. There had never been a chemical reaction in your body like that ever not even with your fluke of an ex-boyfriend. Until you saw Professor Kim.

And that was exactly why you’d abstained from ever taking his class or stepping anywhere near him. If you saw even one single hair of his head, you’d take off in the opposite direction. The feeling you got in your chest whenever you caught a glimpse of him scared you. Keeping your head in your books and studies until graduation and then going on a dig far away from this place sounded like the perfect plan. And for the past two years, you’d done a bang up job of it.

It seemed fate just really liked to kick you down when you were skipping along happily.

In the end, there was no way around taking the class and you were forced to have your name added onto the list, probably bumping off some poor, unfortunate student who had thrown away the money just to be able to spend time in the presence of Professor Kim on a weekly basis.

You were a planner, though. And every plan had its deviations, right? Now that you were stuck in that lecture hall, you’d simply make sure that you sat all the way in the back where Professor Kim would be nothing but an ant in your vision. Most of the time, you might even be able hide him from your line of sight with your laptop.

In order for this mastery to work, you needed to wake up early enough to get from your apartment right across the street from the university to the classroom to secure your seat in the back. But you also had to make sure that you didn’t arrive too early so that it would only be you and maybe a few other students scattered across the room while Professor Kim wandered around the front getting ready for the first day of class.

You were initially set up for success. The alarm was programmed and on the highest volume your phone would allow. It was plugged in for the night to charge and you’d already picked out your outfit so there would be no time wasted in the morning.

Instead of waking up to your obnoxious alarm, however, you were woken up by a pillow to the face.

You snarled as you sat up in bed, sleep still crusty around your eyelids that refused to open all the way. Gemma was standing in your doorway, leaning against the frame with her arms crossed and one wrist elevated as she stared at the watch.

“Don’t you have class in like twenty minutes?” she snickered.

Still half asleep, you scratched the back of your head. “No. My alarm hasn’t gone off yet.”

“Try again.” Gemma stepped up closer to you and showed you the time.

Shit!

You grabbed your phone and pressed the home button to check what had happened. Then you found the issue. At some point, probably very early in the night, the charger had come out of the plug in the wall and your phone had died. You wanted to cry.

Jumping up out of bed, you were at least thankful for the clothes already laid out. You’d have to skip any other form of grooming and pampering this morning beyond a quick fix of your hair. After grabbing a granola bar and chugging a glass of juice, you ran out the door and prayed that you didn’t forget anything behind and that you still had a good spot to sit in.

When you arrived in the lecture hall, your stomach plummeted to the floor.

All the chairs in the back were taken, mostly by the male students, or those who just really didn’t care about the face of the teacher up front.

Slowly, you took one step down at a time, searching for any empty seat that you could take. Every semester, the World Folklore class was filled to capacity. There was even rumor of a waiting list to take the class. How could one professor be so popular, magazine-level handsome or not?

Finally finding the one empty seat in the entire room, you nearly cried. It was in the third row, right near the middle. What were the odds of that being the one chair that was free?

You scooted past the other students, apologizing on the way. One tiny piece of luck you got, at least, was that you didn’t hit any of the students with your bag. Settling down in the chair, you tried not to look too forlorn as you pulled out your laptop and readied yourself for the period.

Professor Kim wasn’t in the classroom yet, for which you were a little thankful. As you kept your head down on the keyboard in front of you, your glasses kept sliding down your nose and you kept pushing them back up a bit aggressively.

The consistent hum around the hall died out. Looking up, you shrank back in your seat. Now was the time. Just breathe, don’t settle on his face. You could do this. You could keep your mind focused on the material and not the teacher.

Walking up to the middle of the room and leaning up against the desk, Professor Kim smiled brightly.

“Welcome, everyone, to World Folklore. This class is about delving into ancient societies and learning about their stories that shaped their cultures.” As he went on with his lecture, his eyes searched around the room aimlessly, never settling even as the occasional student sat up straighter. “I want you to really get inside your heads and really tear these stories apart. Don’t be intimidated by the course work or the speed at which we go through the different types of stories. Unlike other credits, I want you to have fun and-”

He stopped suddenly, his hand that was keeping him balanced against the desk slipping and making him jerk a bit before stabilizing himself.

And he was looking right at you.

The smile was gone from his face, replaced with shock and awe. You shifted in your seat. Why wouldn't he just look away?

With a shake of his head, he did just that, after several seconds too long.

“I want you to have fun and really explore the possibility of ‘why’.” His earlier enthusiasm was gone, replaced by a slight nervousness. “Why did they create these stories? Why were they so scared of these tales? As we break down the different mythological creatures and their spread over the world, we just might end up answering those questions.”

While that might have been the same speech he gave every semester, you had a feeling that no classroom had ever heard it spoken quite like that.

Professor Kim spent the rest of the hour going over the syllabus and his expectations of the semester. Explaining in few details the different papers that would be written over the next few months, you had a sneaking suspicion that he was avoiding your section of the room. He’d always turning quickly, giving a majority of his attention to the left and right sides of the stadium seating. Somehow, rather than putting you at ease, it made you even more uncomfortable.

Your personal reasoning for wanting to avoid Professor Kim and keep your bubbling hormones in check was logical. Why Professor Kim was acting in a similar manner towards you was the real question. You’d never actually met the guy so there was no way he knew who you were. Right?

The time for the end of class came. From your experience, the professor always stayed behind in case of questions or simply took their time gathering up their things to avoid the sea of exiting students. Professor Kim did no such thing. Leaving behind his papers, he practically ran out the back door.

Murmurs echoed around you and you even felt a few questioning stares thrown your way. It was hard, but you suppressed the whimpers that were tempting your vocal cords and tried to stay invisible as you hurried up the stairs and to your next class for the day.

**

This was not happening. This was not happening.

Waking up this morning, Junmyeon had been in a good mood. He’d gotten up in time to get ready, picking out a nice tie to match his light blue shirt hanging from his door. The break between semesters had been a bit boring, just keeping an eye on his brothers and making due with what the town had to offer while he waited for the new school year to start.

But now the new semester was here and Junmyeon was going to be back in the classroom where he loved being.

Everything had gone smoothly as he drank his coffee without spilling any on him, made it to the college without terrible traffic and in plenty of time for his first class. The only mishap was running into Yoo Shin, a fellow history professor at the university. Catching up with him had nice, but it made him a few minutes late and Junmyeon couldn’t stand tardiness.

The students hushed as soon as he came in. It happened every year, but it still boosted Junmyeon’s ego a bit with how easily he could quiet the room. Going into the usual speech to loosen his new students up, he sized up the audience, letting his eyes roam around the room.

And then he found you.

Right there in the third row was the person he’d been searching for so long a time. The shock of you appearing in front of him made him lose his train of thought. He couldn’t even remember the rest of his speech.

But you were his student.

Of course he’d be in this situation. Nothing in his life could be easy for him, could it?

Anyone else in the world, he’d be happy to pursue, to finally get to know his mate. He couldn’t exactly start a relationship with his student. It went against his personal standards... and school statues.

Unable to remember to rest of his usual spiel, Junmyeon had to make up the remaining part of his speech on the fly, cringing on the inside. Was he even making any sense? It was the hardest thing to keep his focus on anything but you and that was making it difficult to know what was even leaving his mouth.

So close. You were so close to him, but he had to act like you were just another student, like you weren’t the most precious thing to him on this earth now as the wolf in his chest whined with glee. After waiting so long for his mate to show up, it seemed like a miracle - and like a slap to the face.

A professor and his student. It sounded like a bad drama. He didn’t even know your name. He’d learn it soon, but he wanted to learn it by introducing himself like a normal person, not by the papers and quizzes you’d hand in.

Groaning, Junmyeon tossed his glasses down on the desk and hid his face in his hands.

As soon as class had ended, he’d booked it out of there and headed straight for the sanctuary of his office. It would have been too tempting to stay behind, to try and catch you and talk to you. He wanted to hear your voice. Was it as delicate as you looked? Or was it stronger, sassier, taking anyone who might underestimate you by surprise?

He’d already caught bad attention from the other students given his very obvious reaction to you. Keeping you after class right after that would have started rumors. That was not something Junmyeon needed right now.

Knock, knock, knock.

Junmyeon jumped at the noise, his heart racing in his chest. It didn’t calm down until Sehun poked his head in.

“Hey,” Junmyeon nodded, leaning back in his chair.

Sehun smirked. “It’s day one. You can’t be this stressed out already?”

Junmyeon shook his head. “I’m just needing a second cup of coffee, that’s all.”

The look on Sehun’s face clearly said that he wasn’t buying it, but right now wasn’t the time to talk about it. Junmyeon knew that divulging the latest upset in his life would come with a hail of questions. Ones that he didn’t have answers to yet. So, instead, he’d keep that information to himself. At least until he knew who you were and how to get to know you without crossing any lines.

“Well, I’m not getting you any,” Sehun teased as he shut the office door behind him.

“I wasn’t even going to bother asking,” Junmyeon laughed. Resting his elbows on the desk, he asked, “What are you doing here? Don’t you have class?”

“Not for another hour,” Sehun shrugged, sitting down in the chair across from him. “I was bored, so I figured I’d come bother you since you aren’t busy with grading yet.”

“That’ll start soon, though,” Junmyeon reminded him.

Putting his feet up on the desk, Sehun leaned back in the chair and folded his hands behind his head. “Until then, you’ll have to continue beating the girls off with a stick.”

Junmyeon shoved the feet off. “That joke is old.”

“Still better than yours.”

It was hard, but Junmyeon let that slide. The guys were always making fun of his jokes, calling them weak and overused. But he liked keeping the mood up and that was one of the few ways he knew how.

“So, why aren’t you hanging out with the others instead?” he asked.

Sehun scrunched his face up in an annoyed fashion. “Everyone is hanging out with their mate in between classes. I prefer not to be around that too much.”

“It’s not an infectious disease,” Junmyeon laughed.

“Might as well be,” Sehun grumbled. “With how quickly everyone’s finding their mates, it feels like the pack has been passing around a cold. Not that I care too much, but I’d still prefer not to catch it next.”

Junmyeon sighed and smiled at his youngest brother. “It’s simply the natural order of things for our species. One day, yours will find you and you’ll start singing a different tune.”

Sehun cringed. “Can I be last?”

With a scoff, Junmyeon waved him out of his office. “Just go get ready for class. Or go find Tao, he’s with you on not wanting a mate.”

“Alright, alright, I’ll get out of your hair.” Standing up, he headed for the door. With one hand on the doorknob, he looked over his shoulder and asked, “Hey, hyung?”

“Yeah?”

“If something was going on, you’d tell me, right?” The look on his face was suddenly so innocent and trusting. Junmyeon almost gave in and told him to sit back down.  

Junmyeon let one corner of his lip to turn up into a sorrowful smile. “Yeah, of course. If something comes up, I’ll tell you.”

Once Sehun was gone, Junmyeon picked up his glasses and placed them back on to his face. He didn’t necessarily think it was a lie. Eventually, he’d tell Sehun and the rest of the pack about finding his mate. He just needed some time to wrap his head around the situation. After that, he’d say something.

They were so going to give him crap for this.

𝒾'𝓂 𝑔𝑜𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓉𝑜 𝓉𝒽𝑒 ᴘʟᴀᴄᴇ 𝓉𝒽𝒶𝓉'𝓈 𝑔𝑒𝓉𝓉𝒾𝓃𝑔 ｃｌｅａｒｅｒ/𝕥𝕒𝕜𝕖 𝓂𝓎 𝐻𝒜𝒩𝒟𝒮 ɴᴏᴡ

╰ ☀ ✧ ˖ jeon jungkook. cismale. he/him ‖ 𝕚𝕥'𝕤 𝕟𝕠𝕥 𝕪𝕠𝕦𝕣 𝕗𝕒𝕦𝕝𝕥 (ɪᴛ ɪꜱ) ‖ have you seen elijah hwang at the beach recently? i remember them being so free-spirited, but they seemed a little neglectful today. it must be tough going through such hard times at only 22. even then, they still remind me of aerosol paint, over-sized hoodies, lipsticks stains on coffee mugs, and open upright pianos.

basics

name: elijah hwang

nicknames: ellie, lijah, el

age: 22

pronouns: he/him

sexuality: he prefers not to label it, but pansexual and demiromantic is probably the best description

tldr

he’s a sweet boy, doesn’t hurt people’s feelings intentionally, but he’s a little flirty, a bit of a heartbreaker. he’s great at turning on the charm but gets flustered very easily when it’s turned back on him.

has a twin brother, daniel. his bio (and their family background!) can be found here

growing up in the shadow of his twin, elijah often acts out rebelliously for attention (and maybe just to spite his perfect police officer brother a little bit)

despite that, he does care very deeply for daniel - after all, they came from the same egg or whatever - and isn’t great at expressing it, but daniel is probably the most important person in his life

tw: drug abuse, gang violence, death

got involved with the wrong crowd shortly after high school - the whole gang, drugs, ‘bad guy, duh’ kinda shebang. he was with this gang for years, getting quite the reputation and a lot of illegal money, tangled with the wrong kind of people and relationships

he traveled a lot, but when he heard daniel and his boyfriend had been jumped, it was a little too coincidental with the gang initiation he knew was happening in the same area - the very initiation he, himself, had approved of

he has never told daniel that he feels responsible for justin’s passing, but he was so filled with guilt that he has since left the gang, lost all his assets, and now works as a stripper to pay off his debts. he has never told daniel about the gang, but he says the debts are from drugs - which isn’t a total lie

(also he’s in a band and plays the keyboard)

bio

alright buckle up lads here comes the details

like i said, family history can be found in daniel’s bio (bc i’m lazy) but - since daniel was obviously their mother, stephanie’s, favourite, elijah often felt inferior and would act out for attention. i’m talking graffiti, being noisy in class, the whole shebang

his other mother, michelle, was obviously his favourite. equally doting to both her sons, elijah adores her and was often glued to her side as a kid. the only time he would obey the rules was when she asked him to listen - if stephanie asked, he would only rebel further

growing up, he and daniel were quite close, even if he did resent his brother for being - well - perfect - but how could he begrudge him for being successful?

elijah didn’t work hard in school - it wasn’t that he couldn’t get good grades, but more that he chose not to, getting grades only good enough that he could stay on the cheerleading squad

NOW LET’S LAY DOWN THE LAW. my mans might be cismale, but he LOVES pretty things. skirts, red lipstick, DANGLY EARRINGS? fam u got it. he loves that pretty shit. cheerleading squad made him wear pants for competitions n stuff but by senior year you know my boy is strutting the hallways in that little cheerleader skirt and pretty pink lipstick. call him a girl tho? he’ll punch u. or his twin will punch u. he’s a boy, thank you very much, and he doesn’t see why boys can’t enjoy pretty skirts and make up too without having to identify as a different gender.

he loves music and art - can play many instruments, and has played the piano since he was little. music and visual arts were the only subjects in school that he excelled in because he enjoyed it so much. he wanted to go to college and study them further, but his grades just weren’t high enough

so, fresh out of high school and not really knowing what to do with his life, elijah could see his brother figuring things out and heading off to the police academy while he... still didn’t know what to do

tw: drug abuse, gang violence, death

had a party phase, hitting up every club he could with his fake ID. it was only inevitable that soon enough he’d get into drugs and - well - with drugs and beautiful men and women, it wasn’t long before elijah found himself involved in a gang with heart eyes for a woman named melanie who showed him the ropes

his role was pretty standard - using his looks and charisma, he quickly became one of their best drug dealers, did a great job swindling thousands of dollars out of other gang leaders and sugar daddies and mommies alike

elijah wasn’t big in the violence side of things, more on the deception and drugs side of it, but he knew that the gang he was in had a lot of that going on. melanie assured him he wouldn’t have to ever kill anyone and she kept to that - although whether or not she did something like that wasn’t something he ever knew. the two of them traveled a lot together with the money he’d gain from their deals, and while they were never exclusive, it was potentially the closest thing to a real relationship he’d ever had

he was in italy when he got the news from daniel, and the timing was too coincidental with the report he’d received from the newest members of the gang. melanie told him he was overreacting - “that’s life, baby boy. your brother is just fine.” - and, seeing her so flippant about it, barely caring that his own brother had been attacked, it finally clicked that his rebellious thing had gone too far, and that this life wasn’t the one for him.

elijah took the first plane back to new york because he knew daniel needed him. the guilt was driving him insane - he knew it was his fault

cradling his broken brother to his chest, elijah made a vow to himself that he could never indirectly cause this to anybody else, but more importantly, that daniel could never, ever find out his involvement with the gang that took so much from him

for the sake of his brother, who he loves so much despite his struggles to show it, he decided to drop the gang, drop the drugs, and do his best to turn it all around

falling for melanie was both a blessing and a curse - if he hadn’t fallen, he probably wouldn’t have been so heavily involved in the gang, but because she had a soft spot for him, she managed to pull some strings and let him leave the gang alive

it cost him all of the illegal fortune he’d made over the years, however, and plunged him into a heavy debt to melanie, which is now why....

𝒴𝒜 𝐵𝒪𝐼 𝐼𝒮 𝐼𝒩 𝒯𝐻𝐸 𝒮𝒯𝑅𝐼𝒫𝒫𝐸𝑅 𝒮𝒬𝒰𝒜𝒟

since college still wasn’t an option, and now he had experience with using his looks and charisma to swindle money, elijah figured stripping wasn’t all too different

he knows his twin would give him the money if he told him he was in debt and in need of it, but to tell him, he’d have to admit of all the illegal activity he’d been involved in and admit to his role in justin’s passing - not to mention he knows daniel would have to throw him in jail if he knew that he’d been doing more a lot more than just drug dealing

instead, he tells his brother he strips because it’s fun and to get enough money to do an entrance exam and try out the whole college thing one day and that he has a slight debt from the drugs but he’s “almost done paying it”

as well as this, elijah is the keyboardist in the band killer nuns, and is happy to at least still be doing music

he still likes to wear pretty things, although he tends to prefer jeans these days, but will still wear pretty crop tops, dangly jewelery, and make up. if he feels like dressing up, out comes the silky skirts and dresses!

(and he still graffitis his art all over buildings illegally, but he knows his twin will bail him out every time)

wanted connections

first of all, if you made it this far, congrats! let’s get to business B)

roommate; ya boy is ,, broke . he can’t always meet the rent but he doesn’t mind paying your character back in less conventional ways. he would ask his twin for money, but he doesn’t want daniel to know he’s struggling financially (taken: isaac lee)

good influence; your character knows elijah is only rebellious because he feels attention-starved - with patience and affirmation, they remind him of his favourite mother and can often convince him to tone things down

partner-in-crime; this person is a free spirit, and the two of them get into all kinds of mischief, whether it’s spray painting a building or dabbling in those drugs he decided to leave behind (taken: isaac lee) (but -- would be open to ONE more partner in crime if u rly liked the sound of it uwu)

regular client; your character knows elijah is only flirty for the money, yet finds themselves coming back every time for another taste

tutor; look... my mans out here tryna get into college. he won’t admit it but he wants to make his brother proud. help a brutha out. tutor him so he doesn’t fail his entrance exams. pls. (taken: yeri song)

gym buddy; lmao a stripper gotta stay in shape somehow man

dress up buddy/platonic wifey; note: this is a connection specifically for a female character! there is ZERO sexual desire here despite the constant “when we’re 30, we’re gonna get married and make some babies” jokes and ocassional ass-grabbing. they’re comfortable af w each other. she helps him with his make up and they go shopping together and give each other cute little fashion shows in their new pretty clothes. she’s affectionately named ‘wifey’ in his contacts list and it’s not uncommon for elijah to give her a chaste kiss in greeting and say ‘honey, i’m home’. they’ve probaly considered hooking up before but figured things would be weird and that they’re better off as friends.

hook-ups; he’s demiromantic, so he’s not gonna get a crush easily, but  he likes sex and he likes pretty people so . have at him ;)

I love myself. I love being myself. And I would not want to be anyone else.

It’s taken me so long to be able to say those first two things, and sometimes I still struggle, but for the most part it’s true. And I’m still discovering new things about myself all the time. It’s weird, because some things I took forever to discover about myself were things that took forever to discover about myself because I didn’t have access to the resources to help me. Like I didn’t realize that I was asexual until I was twenty-one and stumbled across a Wikipedia article about asexuality. I didn’t realize that I had fallen in love with my best friend until I was pretty much in college, which is ridiculous to me considering I look back on how I only went to our senior prom because I was jealous over the idea of her going to said romantic dance with a mutual friend of ours. They were only going as friends, but I felt strong jealously, like, “She should be going to that dance with me” and somehow did not put two-and-two together that being jealous that another girl was going to a romantic dance with someone else was a very not straight way to feel. (For the record, I was a third wheel basically the entire night even though we were supposed to be a big friend trio and it was no one’s fault but my own. I regret it, but I don’t blame my past self because I was a teenager and, as a teenager, I was well within my rights to do stupid things. It was part of the learning and growing process, and thus there’s no need to shame my past self over it. I’m still astounded that I didn’t realize how very not straight I was at that moment, but still.)

One of the recent things I discovered about myself at nearly twenty-nine is the fact that my preferred fashion style---my fashion style---is, and always has been, pretty grunge. I’ve answered meme questions on here before that ask similar questions, and I’m always like, “idk, comfortable and cool?” because I never knew what to say. And hell, when watching Queer Eye, whenever Tan would ask the champion of the episode who their style icon was, I never had an answer. But after I saw Captain Marvel, I realized that my style icon is Carol Danvers when she was wearing the leather jacket + the Nine Inch Nails shirt + the (ripped?) jeans + the flannel + the boots. You know, the “someone’s disaffected niece” look. I saw online that this was a grunge look. I saw a list of grunge traits. And what I saw was:

Oversized, baggy clothing

Muted colors

Makeup, if worn, is preferably dark and a bit smudged

Ripped jeans

Leather jackets and/or flannels

Converse shoes or Doc Martens boots

Band t-shirts

Messy hair, sometimes dyed bright punky colors

Pretty much all of those bullet points hit things I’ve always had in my own fashion sense. My hatred for skinny jeans is well documented; I’ve always worn baggy jeans, and oversized hoodies and often baggy t-shirts are my jam. I definitely prefer more muted colors (see my favorite shades of blue and green for examples) over very bright ones. Wearing makeup is a pain in the ass, but when I do wear it I wear dark eyeliner that looks a bit smudged due to how I apply it, and eye shadow and lipstick that aren’t very bright. Pretty much every pair of jeans I own is naturally distressed and ripped; my absolute favorite pair, which I’m wearing as I type this, has GIANT holes in both knees, and a smaller hole on the back thigh. This is because I’ve been wearing them since high school (they still fit!), and have just naturally worn these holes into them. They weren’t distressed at all when they were purchased for me about fourteen years ago, but now they’re very distressed, and also very beloved. They spark a lot of joy. I’m never getting rid of them.

I don’t have many flannels at the moment (though I have a couple), but I have several different leather jackets. I wore Converse shoes for YEARS, but unfortunately they offer no support and are the reason my achilles tendon is pretty much permanently damaged (might also be why I have knee crepitus as well), so I don’t wear them anymore and instead have legit tennis shoes instead (but ones that are black with white soles so I feel they still fit). However, I do have two different pairs of Doc Martens, one of which is a platform pair, and I love them to death, so. The fact that my preferred shoes were Converse and Docs before I even knew about this is pretty . . .

I used to wear band t-shirts almost exclusively in my teen and young adult years, and stopped pretty much only because I stopped going to concerts, and lost a lot of my band t-shirts to boot (though I do thankfully still do have a 10 Years one, and I hope to get the one currently on their website soon too). But I do have a 10 Years light jacket (super oversized of course), and replaced the band t-shirts with gaming t-shirts. I guess this would make me a bit of a geeky grunge? I don’t think that’s really a “thing,” but if people can invent things like “soft grunge” or whatever, then I feel this should be allowed. I am donating some of my gaming shirts to charity in a couple days because I don’t think I really want them anymore (either because they’re for games I don’t play but got them for free, or because I don’t really like the colors on them and also got them for free), but I still have quite a few of them. I’m a geek, I can’t help it, it’s just who I am.

And my hair is always messy no matter what I do. Even when I pin it up, it still looks a bit messy. It’s just the way it is. 

While I do shower every day and so I don’t fit the “greasy” part of the grunge criteria, and while I’m obviously not going to change myself to more closely fit the grunge criteria, it still felt like a huge “OOHHHHHHHH” moment for me when I realized this. It also makes it a bit easier to shop for fashion things, I feel, because I now have a starting point. I’m not sure this is a starting point that Tan France would approve of given that I am almost twenty-nine and so the “someone’s disaffected niece” look is one I feel that he would think I should not be striving for, but it’s not like I’m really striving for that look, but rather, that that look is who I am. Like it’s what calls to me. And you know what, if Karamo can live off Skittles and Coke every day of his life, I feel like I should be able to dress in a geeky grunge style every day of mine (excepting the days I’m at work since that doesn’t fit with the dress code there). Not that these two things are related, but hey. (Besides, I’m sure that Tan would help me find a way to make it work. Orrr he might try to steer me away from it. Or maybe a meeting point of both? Hmm. Who knows.)

Anyway, there’s no real point to this post. I just felt like making it. And I’m fine, or even happy, with looking like someone’s disaffected niece when I’m outside of work. Sure, I’m almost twenty-nine and therefore nearing thirty, but that doesn’t mean that I need to give up the things I enjoy or who I am, especially since in so many ways I’m still discovering them. You know, there’s this idea that permeates society that at some point you have to grow up and leave behind all the things you liked to do and wear in your younger years behind, but that’s ridiculous. No one magically changes into a boring, plain adult once they hit a certain age, and no one should have to. I still love video games. I still love series and things that I loved when I was a kid. I still like wearing graphic tees and ripped jeans and oversized headphones. I am still a mature, responsible adult despite all this. I still own my home, my car, and hold a steady 8:30am - 5:00pm, Monday through Friday job. People are complicated, they’re complex. You can be someone who enjoys silly, frivolous things like fandom and alternative fashion, and also be an adult who carries adult responsibilities. You never have to worry that you’ll get to an age where you should have yourself figured out by that point, or else you’ve failed, because life is an ongoing process and learning experience. You’re never too old to learn about yourself or embrace who you are. This is something I’ve been realizing with regards to myself and my own life, and it’s something I think so many people could stand to realize, too.

Anyway, this is just some personal rambling, so please DO NOT reblog this, or I’ll just delete the post so it won’t show up with the “keep reading” link is clicked anyway and also block you. It’s just something I wanted to get out of my head, and now I have, so I’m going to go get some sleep. Good night. ♥

How I came out, Multiple Experiences.

The first person I came out to is dead. 

They have been for a long time. We lost her in Year 12 of High School or maybe it was when we were year 11. I just remember I was around 16. It was pretty traumatic for a lot of us. I can’t remember exactly when it happened, like what time of year except it was sometime during either the end of the year or middle of the year (even that is hazy), it was ten years ago or so now.

We weren’t super close, like we didn't hang out on weekends or after school or anything (my parents being super strict religious types who didn’t let me go into town unless it was to the library right up until I was in my last year/sort of learning how to drive).  

But right around when I was becoming aware of my sexuality, or rather why I wasn’t ‘normal’ (second year of senior high, like...2008-9 or something), we’d been writing letters to each other and talking heaps at lunch and in whatever class we shared (I think it was social studies or classics). She felt bad for me because I was such a fucking nerd, and super socially awkward and a little bit chubby/super KY(空気読めない ) - I had friends, but at the time I was becoming more and more uncomfortable hanging out because they were super religious, made me feel like shit sometimes (except the other Hannah who was and still is cool) because my family were new to the church and I was (still am) a little...weird??? I was slowly becoming closer with the kids I took the bus part of the way home with/was in rowing with and their friends, but she kind of noticed how sheltered I was and was kind about showing me it was ok to open up, ask questions and try new things I guess. 

 ANYWAY my Mum had a bad opinion of her, but she was one of the most amazing people who went out of her way to make me see myself as a person and not a monster/demon from hell destined to return, and I couldn’t help her do the same, our situations were so different, I dunno, life is a bitch and it weighs down the best people. She made some bad choices as teenagers do, but her family wasn't really there for her either.  ((My Mum scoffed at her and in earshot one day when she came to pick me up about a month or two before the incident  and said to me that she wasn’t the sort of friend I wanted, and that she was destined to go nowhere (and in my first real act of defiance I stood up for her, called her hypocritical, and continued to write letters.))    

I dunno why but this time of year I always have really shitty dreams about that time, about the last time I kind of awkwardly brushed off her hug goodbye (like I always did, I hated and still do hate, physical affection) and how I wish I’d reciprocated even just a little. Not being able to go to her memorial because my Mum still didn’t like her/her own parents were dicks/I wasn’t in her super close circle of friends. I know I couldn’t have done more than I did, even with some of the content in the letters, I didn’t know what she was going through exactly, I didn’t really GET how bad things were for her. I thought she was going to be able to tough shit out and make her break eventually, but yeah. Life is rough, teenagers go through shit, and yeah. I’ve been dreaming lately, and it sucks ass. I always have this guilt about my grief because I wasn’t in her inner circle, but to me she was the only person really I trusted at that time with one of my “darkest” secrets.  

The second person I came out to was one of the kids I rode the bus home with who is a total no bullshit person. To this day, I am slightly scared of her, but in the best way. She told it like it was. Super awesome and still is, I’m gutted I missed the opportunity to catch up over winter last year when I was in England. I’d borrowed a French CD from her as I was trying to break my weeb phase and try music from other places, and she was worried about the racy cover, the torso of a naked woman (Indochine’s Paradize). MY DUMB ASS TEXTED BACK AND WAS LIKE...DUDE, I’M A LESBIAN...or some stupid shit like that (what a way to come out, over some pervy CD cover....gods I was/am dumb). I don’t think she really knew how to handle it, like it was SUPER out of left field, and like yeah. I don’t really remember what happened after that, she never treated me any different, she asked a lot of really sensible questions, and was patient with me. I think this was in our final year of high school, but it could have been towards the end of year our second year. 

I told her best friend at the time shortly after that, and she was kinda weird about it, lol, but like in her own way...Like in a lot of ways I think she’d guessed (I think a lot of my peers had guessed before me, in typical useless lesbian fashion) because I would always say stuff like “If my friend was gay, that’d be ok, so long as they didn’t try anything on me...” “Love the sinner, hate the sin....” ect. ect. This was right around the time when Gay Marriage was in the news for one reason or another, roughly around three years or so before it became legal in New Zealand. So that was a ride. I still don’t know how the whole thing didn't get blown up by her and she didn’t tell the rest of our peers (if she did, they kept it quite and were really respectful, waited for me to tell them). I was terrified of my family or the teachers finding out too...for a little bit anyway, and then towards the end of Year 13 I think I came out to everyone (except my family) and just was like fuck it, if people have a problem with it, I’ll just punch them/shout at them and then go cry in the toilets or something - but I didn’t need to because for whatever reason most of my year group were really cool about it! 

There were a few people in between then though.

For some reason I was in a car with a fellow self proclaimed nerd some time late at night driving somewhere in town (to or from a movie, or potentially ball lessons or something?Maybe even something to do with a one year memorial to above mentioned friend, I REALLY can’t remember.)  This person was also one of the people I felt the least judged around, like I’d say a lot of dumb shit or nerd out about something and they’d either laugh, give me a look that was like... you weirdo....but never treated me any different. I think at this point I was like... .I don’t remember how it came up, but I was like...please don’t crash, but I think I like girls. And I think I also said how I’d told above two friends, but wasnt out to family because that would not be a fun time ect. I don’t remember much after the fact, but for me this was significant because baby gay me was sweet on her (don’t freak out if you’re reading this dude please, like I at this point I was still struggling with the whole admiration vs romantic interest thing. I thought you were super straight, didn’t want to take/ruin any friendship we had for granted, wasn’t like really interested in dating anyone even though in highs school that wasnt and option anyway ect...I thought/think you are cute, have a good sense of humor, great taste in books and are very kind and intelligent, qualities that I really respect and value in all my friends). She’s a cool kid, probably the one who had the closest interests to me out of that whole group in terms of reading taste and interest in Japanese stuff. I AM SO SORRY. SO. SO SORRY I TOLD YOU WHILE YOU WERE DRIVING. My sense of self preservation at that/this time is obviously no-existent.  Also cheers for not telling my Mum...she thought you were neat and I think she talked to you a bit about unrelated stuff (probably for you Halloween party??? occasionally at cycling, you were legit the only friend I’ve had that like, she approved of) at some point. 

One of the more popular/well respected/super out of my social status girls and I were taking extra scholarship exams for biology and classics. She was super popular, super snobby, REALLY EMOTIONAL, weirdly open about the grossest stuff and also really beautiful. I was SUPER intimidated by her, and she like flat out asked me why I wasn’t interested in any of the guys I hung out with outside of school/never talked about any crushes on celebrities... again...Dude, I like girls I think... (I ALSO HAD A HUGE CRUSH ON MY MARRIED CLASSICAL HISTORY TEACHER. FUCK. MY. LIFE. Never told anybody at school though.) She was SHOOK. To her credit, she recovered quickly asked a bunch of questions and promised not to tell my parents. I think she told some of her other popular friends, who to their credit, didn’t treat me any different and didn’t out me to teachers or my parents. As mentioned,  my peer group was surprisingly blase about stuff like that (probably owing to one of their own coming out of the closet at some point either at the same time/a while before me). I wasn’t exactly bullied for that, but I was picked on for other things (like my nerdiness, my weight, my quirky habbits, my loathing of all things feminine that I had to wear including my uniform, my lack of fashion sense, my scatterbrained-ness). 

Another one of the more fiery kids was super cool about it too. She was always a bit much for me, and also the last person I expected to be one of the first people to get married/partnered up and have a house/kid on the way. She was probably the one who grilled me the most on everything. Because until this point I was one of the SUPER religious kids, with SUPER traditional parents.

Once I hit Uni, I went full baby gay. Came out to my room-mates right away. No problems there. Came out to friends I made right away. Came out to pretty much everyone I met and was bloody obnoxious about it. How I didn’t accidently out myself to family until like...third year Uni I HAVE NO IDEA. 

At this point I was “seeing” someone from online, who halfway through third semester of my first year was cheating with a dude from Auzzie. I got so upset I actually went propper drinking after one of our college functions and broke down. I came out to my parents then, at the end of year, right before final exams, I wrote a drunk email - got my very patient older flatmate to check it (she was an insomniac, and still awake at 3am watching shitty tv and studying). She made me wait until at least 7am and a cat nap/a shit ton of water and sobering up and a final read through before I clicked send. 

My Mum must have read it at like, 8am, because I got an email right around 10am and it went down like a ton of bricks. Bible verses and pleas to get help and they drove up and saw me to lecture me the next week, we had a fight of sorts, in public, but not like a super big one, just one where Dad didn’t talk for me the whole summer after that (I went home against my better judgment to work and not pay rent...I relied on them for money during Uni, and have mixed feelings about that, I am grateful they still gave me the opportunities they did, but somewhat bitter because they don’t LISTEN to anything I say that challenges what they believe when I had/have to consider and listen to what they believe) and then not until like...the middle of the next year? Yeah, it was a wild ride. 

We still are very tense with each other and fight about a lot of stuff, they get progressively more racist/homophobic every year but then they have lulls where we don`t talk about stuff of that vein and it’s almost like we’re a family again? My brother is mostly cool, he’s not super on board with gender diversity, but he’s been doing some reading recently and at least uses my preferred pronouns and name most of the time...

Only some of the extended family know, basically one family of cousins on my Dads side (plus their parents), and only one of the girls on my Mums plus her parents who are awesome (they offered to have me come stay with them and help out if my family booted me). I haven’t said anything to the grandparents. I actually outed myself accidentally to my cousin on my Dads side in third year, at a friends place (I thought I outed her, accidentally, then remembered....shit, she’s out to everyone, I’m only out to friends...) - she was in a dorm together and asked how I knew my friend. “Oh, we both go to the same LGBTQAI+ support group...” I say. “Fuck....” I say. “Dammit, I owe Sarah (older cousin) $50″ she texts me after she breezes out the door to some party. 

The one almost family member I nearly told died before I could come clean. Shortly after I came out to my parents, a family friend of ours, who my parents knew through cycling, got really aggressive cancer. She was gone by mid-way through my second year in July. I’ve been dreaming about her too recently, I always dream about the two of them this time of year. I think Nic knew, she would always talk about stuff with me that made me feel super supported and loved. I miss her, and regret this the most.

- So yeah. TLDR; I HAVE BEEN HAVING SAD DREAMS. I am avoiding sleeping even though I need to be up early to prove to my bank that I AM NOT DOING MONEY FRAUD BECAUSE I AM A FOREIGNER I DAMN WELL LIVE AND WORK HERE AND HAVE A STUDENT LOAN!

Revenge for the boss from hell. 30k+ payable to me, thanks.

very long story. TL;DR at the end.

I worked for this small business IT Consulting firm for seven years. Owned and operated by a person we will call Dick.

First two years things were fine. Occasionally this guy would take things a little too far, he was just passionate about his opinion and always had to be right, so I’d always give him that. I don’t have to agree but I saw his need and left it at that.

What I started to discover however is the turn over for the company is a couple of years and I began to realize why. The Boss (Dick), picks one worker and makes it his life’s work to make that person as miserable as possible. I’m guessing the reason, ego purposes?

For months I’d hear him shouting all the time at this one guy. The co-worker after leaving the meeting would go back to his office from where I had a view and I could just see the stress and misery in his face. Till finally I said to him, “what the hell man? He’s always giving you a hard time here lately, what did you do?”

He didn’t seem to know. He confided in me right there the level of hell he’s in and some of the things Dick has said or done. I couldn’t believe some of the details he shared on what Dick both said and did. I felt things were embellished because people just don’t do some of the things he said. I would realize much later he was telling the truth as crazy as it sounded.

A few months later he finally found another job and left. I talk to him couple times a year and he always said it was the best choice in his life he ever made.

Dick’s sights then narrowed on to me. I can take a lot. So for the next five years I took it. He would insult me pretty much every day, each day more and more colorful. I didn’t really care or take it home with me so it wasn’t a problem for me, for Dick I would learn it was.

Unrelated, five years in I put in my notice because he asked me to get a couple certifications and if I did he would take care of me. Once I did what was requested he backed out of the agreement and played coy. Once he received my notice a couple months later he called me up within a minute, begged me to stay. It’s important to note he only asked for two certifications, I not only obtained those but an addional fourteen on top of that. Each time he would tell me “Great job, you will be well taken care of”. He lied 16 times in total on this matter. He matched the offer and increased my Salary up another 15k. Not looking forward to starting a new job I decided to stay.

What I learned is I was a fool to do that and money isn’t everything. Go where you’ll be the most happy. Best life advice I can give after this experience.

He left me alone for a couple months after that, he wasn’t in the office much either. Then a day struck his fancy to start things up again only he ran out of material. My work is solid and he had no opportunity to criticize that.

The only method he had was bashing his ego and sarcasm around but he realized it had no impact on me. Here is a Brief snippet of any given day of what it’s like to be selected as his target. He would communicate a problem he was having in length. Let’s say he complained about his cell phone. After he finished his story you would provide a helpful suggestion or advice from your experience. In turn he would ask with an entitled and sarcastic tone if you were an expert on the matter and wanted to see those credentials. I learn fast, just never speak unless spoken too. Any comment or insult he made I would respond without emotion and just say ok.

Because Dick wasn’t able to get a rise out of me the old fashioned way he decided to create fictional content for a new direction.

Our small company would go out to eat as a whole, or just order in on Fridays. I ate half my sandwich, and wrapped the remaining to take home. He saw me with leftover food and claimed that I was taking home dinner on his dime. Any time there was any leftover, even a single French fry he’d be there with a magnify glass for inspection to find any conceivable way to yell.

So on Fridays I started packing my lunch, I’d order a beverage and a side. I’d finish the beverage and the side. Then eat what I brought, if I didn’t finish it he had no opportunity. You could see his look of disappointment when he would scan my plate.

This went on a couple weeks, he had no opportunity and couldn’t complain. He realized he failed again. So then he came up with the next item.

The Bathroom. This I actually did a little research on and couldn’t find anything legally I could do. But anytime anyone would use the rest room he would blame me for the smell. Instead of hello when passing in the highway he would say “Did you use spray” or “Did you light a match” as hateful as he could, but that was his normal. It went much deeper than this, more then I care to share. But I honestly believe Dick has a fetish on this topic which is why I looked in to it legally. It was just always on his mind and a little too important to him, let’s just leave the rest unsaid.

I must have visually tipped him off I didn’t approve of this because he never got bored with it. However I did at least get him to stop asking about if I used spray. Anytime I used the bathroom, even to take a piss I’d use the entire can of air freshener. This wasn’t an easy task as I’d have to mask my face to empty that entire thing. Takes a while surprisingly to empty an entire can in a session. One thing is for certain when I was finished, someone used the “spray” and Dick was buying a new can. Took about five weeks but I think he figured it out spending so much on spray, he stuck to just asking about matches after that. He even provided them in the bathroom.

One day we were out with a client. The current topic at this moment was “what is your favorite meal? My answer was “hot wings, I could eat those every day!” Dick jumps in, his comment “Just think how bad the bathroom would smell”. Most at table wouldn’t get the context and direction of that comment, but I knew. He did this in front of a client, in public, while people are eating.

I almost walked out. Then I remembered he drove and it’s a long way back. Plus Dick is over 60, what kind of person knocks out a senior? I had to chant that in my mind to keep control. I never get pissed but after years this was the last straw! I seriously pleaded with myself all day not to do it because I’d go to jail and he would win.

During this time period he also started playing with my money. Behind 4-5 months with reimbursement, week late on paychecks, stuff like that. You ask where it’s out, he says “next week” you explain he already said that last week, then he’d play coy.

I finished out the day without reacting somehow. Took everything I had but I’m not going to allow this to be unanswered. That was dangerous and too close. If he want’s trouble, I’ll give it to him! I will get even in a lawful way, somehow.

Then the idea came to me that night, did my research and odds were in my favorite that it could work. I’m just going to mirror him until he fires me. When he fires me he will have to pay half my current salary of 65k until I get a new job. You know what? I can live perfectly fine on 32.5k. Why not make him pay out of his pocket 32.5k for everything he had said and done? He would have to pay this over the course of six months or until I found a new job. So my goal was to make him pay me $32,500 to be exact over 6 months as restitution for what he said at that table.

I read up on all the rules in my state for Unemployment. Each state is different. But basically to qualify for it, it can’t be your fault if you were fired. So If I stood there and told him where to put it, that’s a no go. However if I was laid off I would qualify.

So I hit him where it hurt first, his favorite thing in the world is meetings. Because he loves to hear himself talk and take you step by step through his thought process with a noble tone congratulating himself for his thinking and why his way is the best way. So I started speaking up and illustrated a more efficient way that cost less.

He would argue, sometimes red in the face mad. Especially if others in the meeting liked my idea. He knew he was wrong but he would dismiss them and demand it be done his way.

I then started talking about him within ear shot on purpose. I’d say things like “Make sure you perform that Dicks way, takes longer but it’s better than him releasing the Kraken”. It would make everyone laugh, but it wasn’t a direct insult.

Trust me when I say this guy has a massive ego and I was counting on this for pissing him off. I laid it on thick, in time it took its toll. I knew it did because what came next.

His retaliation was the kitchen sink, he had nothing so he started accusing me of things, then playing coy when it came to reviewing the details or facts. He would put words in my month, I’d state he was wrong and then he would tell me I was. All he was doing was opening the door so he could play a revengeful sarcasm game. I know it’s a game so I decided to take his new toy away from him by just going along with whatever it is he said. Which further made him mad because what he was doing had no effect on me.

Fast forward six months, yes I’m STILL working here. But were only receiving a couple calls a day which are fifteen minutes each. This was due to Dick’s bad business discussions.

While I took delight knowing he was hemorrhaging money for months, I was hoping for a lay off to execute my plan. Nothing. I have to make him want to fire me, it’s the only way. I have to beat him at his own game while providing the illusion he is in control.

So I turned up the heat. I was asked to travel to a client by the 2nd in command. I said “I’m sorry man, I haven’t received reimbursement in six months for travel expenses and I just had my work cell phone service turned off. With the way business is right now things aren’t looking good, I’d be stupid to take on more expenses, and I’m owed over two thousand dollars as it is. Once that’s paid in full I’d be more than happy to continue on a week to week bases after reimbursements”.

That day Dick had a meeting with me and setup a payment plan to pay the money back. After three weeks it would be paid. So I said to Dick “understood, after three weeks I’ll be on the road again, cool” just making sure he understood because he wanted to play games and not pay the amount in full Dick is now going to pay me my salary for three weeks to do nothing until the reimbursement fee is paid.

Guy has a several million dollar house, goes on vacations has a boats, etc. Out of all the things I’ve done so far, this had made the most significant impact. Because I out whit him at his own game, it embarrassed him in the eyes of others. Why? Because the second of command was instructed to drive me anywhere I was needed. So I had my own personal Taxi driver for the few calls we had over the next two weeks. Two weeks he paid two people, me and the admin to drive and watch me work. I was friends with the admin and he knew exactly what I was doing and he loved every second of it.

Then on the third week, three days until the final payment, it happens. Dick enters my office, and gives me the filmier demeaning dog wave gesture to follow him without speaking. We sit down and he asks me what the problem is?

I told him the problem is he needs a new hobby. In one hand you have someone sitting here that busted his ass for the last seven years, in the other your need to bash someone’s face in the dirt with your ego. The problem with me is I won’t conform and provide both.

He asked for some examples. I said you know what I’m talking about and even if I did review them you’d play coy. He then played coy about being coy, I laughed.

After a pause He said if you feel that way why didn’t you speak to me about it? I reminded him that I did twice and both times you humiliated me for it and said “this is I.T!” What the I.T Career that I’ve done the last twenty years had to do with his ego I’ll never know.

He responded with I’m behind the times, my work has been poor and out of the kindness of his heart he gave me a raise after I demanded it. I responded with Ok.

Then he finally said what I wanted to hear “I want to call it quits”.

I remained professional and communicated I’m sorry things didn’t work out and spent the next two hours reviewing stuff with co-workers on how to handle certain things. I shook his hand with a smile and left without saying anything negative. The fruit of my labor will do the talking for me shortly.

In route on the way home I called family members to tell them the good news. Everyone was so happy for me. It finally happened.

When I arrived home I promptly adjusted the dates on the unemployment forms I had filled out already in wait and submitted them. I called the state and confirmed everything was documented on my end accurately and now it’s the waiting game.

My plan wasn’t realized until my boss receive the letter in the mail about a week later stating he’s going to have shell out my Salary for the next six months or until I found a job.

Panicked at this point he realized what I set him up for. So He claimed he fired me for poor work performance. The state said, ok prove it. In this state it’s the employers’ burden to prove it. My record had no blemishes and he couldn’t use a client because a number of people at any given client would vouch for me and the truth as they all liked me and appreciated my work.

Realizing the shit storm he’s in now I’m told from the admin friend he was on the phone with them quite a while twisting and turning the fake stories out. Bottom line, the state needed to see documented verbal and written warnings, signed so he couldn’t fake them. He called his lawyer and his lawyer told him he’s screwed.

Later my boss told co-workers he felt bad for me that I couldn’t find work and he decided to give unemployment to me to save face of his ego. That made official that his ego was effected, he didn’t want anyone to know the truth. At this point he realized I got the better of him when I fought back and I won, big!

In a last ditch effort he lied about how much I made. The state sent me paper work stating this fact and asked me to prove my salary. So I gave them copies of checks and pay stubs for the last six months. After that things went easy, he was flagged for lying which made the reaming steps effortless the state rep told me.

For the reason I was terminated I said “Dick the owner made some poor business discussions that impacted the company losing business and clients. He let me go as a business discussion, in his shoes I’d of done the same and understand.”

I wrote it that way for a reason. But Dick didn’t realize why. I knew what his reaction would be. The state saw a down to earth guy that was honest and understanding on paper. Then they saw Dicks predicted response of being a dick, most likely yelling and of course lying. I had no doubt that would seal the deal simply on the evaluation on character before the facts even entered in to it.

His reaction being, his ego had to take it up the ass. Once for failing as a business man, another for me saying so on state paper work, and lastly accepting that I got the better of him and all this time I have been coaxing him to make this move.

The only thing left to do is pay me, every single week. And his money goes to the state first then the state sends it to me, so he can’t play games with my money or the state is coming after him.

Over the next six months I took that time to enjoy myself, pursue hobbies and lived life to the fullest on his dime as a reward for his comment. Once the letter came to renew unemployment, Dick would no longer have to pay or only a parentage I forget, the important thing to know is tax payers would have to pay after six months not Dick. So I declined the renewal. Three weeks later I had a new job.

It was either that or knock him out during that lunch, It wasn’t easy, took work but I’m proud of the way I handled it. I feel vindicated, it’s pretty rare the world is balanced, evil often wins. But not this time. This time it cost Dick, 32,500 dollars to be exact. All in all I can say 10/10 would do it again.

Due to his age I can’t imagine that it would be a humbling experience at this point. But it was for me, money isn’t everything, there is only one thing of true value, your happiness. A year later, I’m very happy now, I enjoy my new job and my new boss. I discovered myself again, who I really am. The goofy friendly guy, my light is no longer dimmed by a dark presence and I can be myself without punishment.

(source) (story by Divine_Squire)

Spring sports season was triumphant, therapeutic- Southern edition

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Spring sports season was triumphant, therapeutic- Southern edition

Let’s face it.

A full sports season was just what the doctor ordered.

And the 2021 spring campaign delivered in every way.

After being deprived of a season in 2020 due to COVID, spring athletes and coaches were primed to make up for lost time and they certainly did so from start to finish.

For the first time since the winter campaign of 2019-20, we had a full regular season and postseason and plenty of memories were made.

On the diamond, South Portland wasn’t expected to win the Class A state title, but thanks to a postseason surge, that’s exactly what the Red Riots did. Scarborough, the reigning champion, was upset in its first game by Portland. Cape Elizabeth, meanwhile, got to the Class B South quarterfinals before losing a 10-inning marathon to York.

Softball also produced a champion, a perfect champion for that matter, and this time, it wasn’t Scarborough, but the best Cape Elizabeth team in program history, which won Class B for the second time. Scarborough’s three-year reign in Class A ended in shocking fashion with a loss to Falmouth in the Round of 16. South Portland lost in the same round, dropping a weather-delayed, nine-inning, nearly four-hour decision to Thornton Academy.

Boys’ lacrosse saw Cape Elizabeth stake its claim as not just the Class A champion or best team in the state, but arguably the most dominant in program or state annals. Scarborough enjoyed a season of resurgence which saw it get to the Class A South semifinals before losing at Berwick Academy. South Portland won a preliminary round game over Massabesic, then was also eliminated by Berwick Academy, in the quarterfinals.

On the girls’ side, there were no titles this year, but Scarborough had a season to remember, improving from one win in 2019 to 11 this spring. The Red Storm made it all the way to the Class A South Final before losing to eventual champion Kennebunk. South Portland was ousted in the preliminary round by Bonny Eagle. Cape Elizabeth, the two-time reigning Class B champion, won at Cony in the state preliminary round, then lost to Yarmouth in the quarterfinals.

The outdoor track state meet produced plenty of highlights, including Scarborough’s boys capturing their fourth Class A crown since 2016. The Red Storm won four individual events, but they weren’t alone when it came to first-place finishers from the area.

Tennis saw Cape Elizabeth’s girls get to the Class B state final before dropping a 3-2 decision to Waterville. Scarborough dropped a narrow decision to eventual regional champion Falmouth in the Class A South semifinals. South Portland was ousted in the preliminary round by Cheverus.

Cape Elizabeth’s boys lost in the Class B South quarterfinals to Greely. Scarborough’s boys fell in the Class A South quarterfinals to Thornton Academy. South Portland was eliminated in the preliminary round by Windham.

We’re already enjoying summer, but let’s take another look back and pay tribute to some of the best moments of the spring.

Team state champions

Cape Elizabeth Capers softball, Class B Cape Elizabeth Capers boys’ lacrosse, Class A Scarborough Red Storm boys’ outdoor track, Class A South Portland Red Riots baseball, Class A

Regional champions

Cape Elizabeth Capers girls’ tennis, Class B South

Individual state champions

Track Hadley Mahoney, Cape Elizabeth, Class B girls’ mile Hadley Mahoney, Cape Elizabeth, Class B girls’ two-mile Zach Barry, Scarborough, Class A boys’ 800 Nicholas Connolly, Scarborough, Class A boys’ shot put Jayden Flaker, Scarborough, Class A boys’ 110 hurdles Jayden Flaker, Scarborough, Class A boys’ 300 hurdles Elaina Panagakos, Scarborough, Class A girls’ shot put Geneva Holmes, South Portland, Class A girls’ discus

Michael’s top five stories/moments

5) Scarborough track wins again

Scarborough’s Jayden Flaker won both the 110 and 300 hurdles at last month’s Class A state meet, helping the Red Storm win the team championship. Ben McCanna / Portland Press Herald

It turns out that about the only thing that can keep Scarborough’s boys’ outdoor track team from winning the Class A state title is a pandemic. After missing out on a chance to win the title in 2020 due to the season being canceled, the Red Storm returned to their familiar perch this spring, tallying 82 points to beat runner-up Edward Little (64.5) and the rest of the field. Scarborough won four individual events at states, as Jayden Flaker took the 110 hurdles and 300 hurdles, Nicholas Connolly won the shot put and Zach Barry was first in the 800.

4) Scarborough girls enjoy bounce-back campaign

Scarborough’s Sawyer McFadden celebrates the Red Storm’s semifinal round playoff win over Massabesic.  Brianna Soukup / Portland Press Herald

Scarborough’s girls’ lacrosse team didn’t wind up bringing home a championship, but the Red Storm were undoubtedly the feel-good story of the spring. Coach Emily Field vowed her team was better than its 1-11 record in 2019 showed and that it would show great improvement this season and she was spot-on. Scarborough unleashed a potent offense and a steady defense with standout senior goalie Kathleen Murphy holding down the fort as a last resort. The Red Storm won their first four games, went 9-3 in the regular season, then downed both Gorham and Massabesic to reach the regional final. There, Scarborough met its match in an unbeatable Kennebunk squad, but the Red Storm are back where they belong near the top of the heap and they figure to remain there for the foreseeable future.

“It’s certainly not the ending we’d hoped for, but looking at the entire season, holy smokes I am so proud of my girls,” Field said. “I’d confidently say we accomplished just about everything we set out to do this year. To come from a 2-10 no playoff season, to a 1-11 no playoff season, to no season, and now to finish 11-4 with two of the four losses by only one goal, and runners-up in the Class A South Final. I mean, that’s pretty incredible.”

3) Cape boys crush just about everyone 

Cape Elizabeth’s Caden Lee and his teammates had a lot to celebrate this spring, culminating with a stunningly one-sided 19-6 victory over Falmouth in the Class A state final. Brianna Soukup / Portland Press Herald

Words like juggernaut and team for the ages don’t do the 2021 Cape Elizabeth boys’ lacrosse squad justice. The Capers didn’t just win their first Class A title and the 21st overall in the history of the state’s most storied program, they did it by absolutely crushing the opposition, especially teams that thought they might be able to give Cape Elizabeth a game. The Capers out-scored the opposition 199 goals to 47 during the regular season and beat eventual Class B champion Yarmouth by 15 and 14 goals respectively, won by 15 goals at two-time reigning Class A champion Thornton Academy, handled rival Falmouth by nine and closed with an 11-goal romp at Scarborough. Cape Elizabeth had no trouble with Noble or Gorham in its first two playoff games, winning by a composite 40-3 margin, but in the Class A South Final, the Capers would be tested for the first and only time, by Berwick Academy, before holding on for an 11-9 victory. Then, in the state final versus Falmouth, Cape Elizabeth broke it open with four goals in a 47-second span late in the first period, took a stunningly commanding 15-1 halftime lead, then went on to a 19-6 victory. The only remaining question is where this squad ranks all-time.

“Statistically, this is probably the number one group we’ve ever had,” longtime Capers coach Ben Raymond said. “As lacrosse players, they’re pretty darn close. We had some other great teams that would probably argue.”

2) Cape softball simply perfect

Cape Elizabeth’s Julia Torre hoists the state championship trophy after the Capers completed a perfect season by beating Winslow in the Class B state final. Michael G. Seamans / Morning Sentinel

Speaking of all-time powerhouses, Cape Elizabeth’s softball team was equally dominant this spring, the Capers first under coach Kristen Duross, who has yet to experience a loss with the program. Cape Elizabeth out-scored its 16 regular season foes by a jaw-dropping 221 runs to 13. Not only did the Capers punish the softball like no one else, the pitching staff, led by senior ace Anna Cornell, threw 10 shutouts. After beating Freeport and Poland by a combined 35-2 margin in the first two playoff rounds, Cape Elizabeth got pushed to the brink by Medomak Valley in the Class B South semifinals (scoring a seventh inning run for a 1-0 victory) and Fryeburg Academy in the regional final (the Capers scored twice in the seventh to survive and advance, 5-4). The state final saw Cape Elizabeth return to its unstoppable ways, as the Capers scored 19 runs and beat Winslow, 19-6, in five-innings, for the second championship in program history.

“This team dominated on both sides of the field,” said Duross. “We had a deep team this year. One through nine could hit the ball hard and I could put anyone anywhere on defense and they would be able to make a big play. This team is the real deal and deserved nothing less than what they earned. They’re very, very talented.”

1) South Portland baseball parties like it’s 1952

South Portland’s baseball team celebrates after defeating Bangor for the program’s first Class A state title since 1952. Ben McCanna / Portland Press Herald

Next year finally came to South Portland. The Red Riots had come oh-so-close to winning an elusive title in recent seasons and could have ended its title drought in 2020 had COVID not wiped out the season. This year, many felt South Portland was too inexperienced to go all the way, but after an 11-5 regular season, the Red Riots put it all together when it mattered most. South Portland dispatched Sanford and Bonny Eagle to start the playoffs, then edged Cheverus in the semifinals and blanked top-ranked Thornton Academy in the Class A South Final. That set up a showdown with always-tough Bangor in the state final and sure enough, there was little separation between the teams. The game would go to the bottom of the seventh inning, tied, 2-2. The Red Riots loaded the bases and Richard Gilboy entered his name into program lore, not with a booming hit, but by taking ball four on a 3-2 pitch, bringing home Frank Tierney with the run that gave South Portland its first crown since 1952.

“The last pitch, I saw it going a little outside,” Gilboy said. “I thought it might get called a strike, but I saw it drop down and I knew it was over.”

“I feel like we’ve been so close so many times,” Red Riots coach Mike Owens said. “It feels good to finally kick that door open. This is so special for our community that has supported us all the way through. I’m almost speechless. They’re all special, but when you can get that first one and it’s been so long, it’s extra special.”

Sports Editor Michael Hoffer can be reached at [email protected] Follow him on Twitter: @foresports.

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How the Pandemic Changed Sabine Roemer’s Jewelry Business LONDON — Disrupter, fixation, opportunity. The pandemic has been all that and more for jewelry fans and designers alike. Just ask Sabine Roemer. The German-born designer has two brands: the high jewelry line that carries her name (one-off pieces priced from 10,000 pounds, or about $14,095) and Atelier Romy, which sells trendy pieces like stackable chain necklaces and ear party studs online for £50 to £500. And now that England is easing restrictions, she said, both lines are emerging as direct-to-consumer businesses — and are linked more closely to her own identity as a craftswoman. “Workmanship is absolutely apparent in everything Sabine does,” said Marisa Drew, a senior investment banker in London who has jewelry from both of Ms. Roemer’s brands. “There’s always a personality in her pieces and she really approaches her designs with a story in mind.” Ms. Drew said she likes Ms. Roemer’s transformable designs and strong attention to detail, features that also resonate with Sarah Giovanna, a managing director at a private equity firm in London. “She sits down with you and really creates something that fits you. For me, it’s all about flexibility,” said Ms. Giovanna, who also wears both lines. “I work in a high-intensity environment, dealing with big businesses, and I want pieces that I can dress up and down. Both brands deliver that.” Last year’s lockdown, however, was “a make-and-break moment,” Ms. Roemer said, especially for Atelier Romy, which was only three years old when the pandemic hit. “I was forced to look at every single aspect of the business, and not just entrust it to others,” the 41-year-old designer said, admitting she had focused on creation and clients. Suddenly she couldn’t just help clients dream up high jewelry pieces like a pair of diamond and pearl earrings topped with 17-carat citrines or work on a philanthropic collaboration like the jeweled rendition of a postage stamp she created for the Queen Elizabeth Scholarship Trust in 2017 to celebrate the queen’s 65 years on the British throne. In March 2020, Ms. Roemer canceled her shipping agent. She hadn’t been entirely happy with its service and decided fulfillment should be handled in-house. “I packed, I shipped and tied the ribbon around every box,” she said. “I needed to learn everything — my accountant joked that it was like McDonald’s, where you have to start in the kitchen and work your way up.” (A handwritten card now accompanies every order.) Ms. Roemer and her team also focused on Atelier Romy’s social media presence, creating stronger digital content and visuals that highlighted Ms. Roemer as the maker behind the jewels. She wouldn’t share sales figures, but Ms. Roemer said shoppers must have liked the changes, as sales increased fivefold. It’s the kind of online marketing that is here to stay, said Juliet Hutton-Squire, head of global strategy at Adorn, a jewelry market intelligence firm. When consumers couldn’t spend on travel, she said, they began spending more on luxury items and investment pieces. Fashion brands were well positioned to capture those sales, thanks to their early investments in digital, and “brands with an online presence or shoppable content on social media were even further ahead of the curve as mobile phones became the way we shop,” Ms. Hutton-Squire explained. “That is just going to continue. We are not going back from this.” Entrepreneurial jeweler In many ways, Ms. Roemer’s early career — which began as a 15-year-old goldsmith apprentice in Germany — led to her roles as a businesswoman and jeweler today. Crafting jewelry, she said, is not all about “tools, craft and creation,” as she had once imagined. “You soon realized you also have to be good at physics and math, chemicals and chemistry. Thankfully, those were my favorite subjects at school.” Atelier Romy has exercised her mathematical brain even more. “I love data,” she said. “I find it fascinating sitting at home in lockdown and just looking at data and who’s coming into the virtual shop.” After graduating from Pforzheim Goldsmith and Watchmaking School in Germany, Ms. Roemer joined Stephen Webster, a London designer she said she particularly admired as “a craftsperson and not just a designer.” More work for other Bond Street houses followed, plus orders from private clients — turning the early 2000s into something of a golden era for Ms. Roemer’s high jewelry career. Her philanthropic work also was recognized, especially several custom pieces she made in collaboration with the Nelson Mandela Foundation, like a gold, diamond and emerald bangle inscribed with the South African president’s prison number; Morgan Freeman wore the piece to the 2010 Oscars as a best actor nominee for “Invictus.” Ms. Roemer said the experience showed her how jewelry could be a form of storytelling. “The easy thing to do was put a bling diamond piece that gets attention, but I wanted to put Mandela’s story on the red carpet,” she said. “In the end, jewelry is emotional — you wear it every day on your skin. I don’t wear my grandmother’s handbag every day but I do wear her ring. It’s close to me, and really carries that emotional value.” That same year, her first high jewelry collection debuted at Harrods. Atelier Romy — a name inspired by the birth of Ms. Roemer’s first daughter, Romy — was created as an affordable ready-to-wear line to be sold exclusively online. “I wanted to portray something a bit different,” she recalled. “Something with strong bold designs but still modern and zeitlos” — German for ageless — “depending on how you’d layer and make it your own.” Soul and purpose Valery Demure, the London-based brand consultant who represents several independent jewelers (but not Ms. Roemer), said: “Sabine interests me because she doesn’t come from a jewelry family. Everything she’s learned has been through hard work by herself, and the fact that she has all these skills. She is a woman with a real soul and purpose.” That sense is increasingly relevant in a post-pandemic world. Ms. Hutton-Squire said the pandemic’s “enforced pause button” highlighted the importance of sustainability and the environment, spurring jewelers to act online in more authentic ways. Whether that was creating, for example, a playlist for meditation or sharing home recipes, “it wasn’t all about sell, sell, sell,” she said. “That really kind of separated the authentic bands from the less authentic ones.” That also explains the growing demand for craft — something Ms. Roemer said she had experienced prepandemic with some of her high jewelry line’s female clients. “They have a very different mind-set: asking who made it and what it is. It’s less about the stone, how big it is and the carat size,” Ms. Roemer said. “They just want to express themselves and their personalities through jewelry.” She has been bringing the sentiment online. Atelier Romy now has weekly drops of “how to style” videos and footage of Ms. Roemer at the workbench, cutting, soldering and shaping metal, always among her most popular posts. “Few people really know how jewelry is still made,” she said. “It was nice to take people into the workshop and show them the process.” In March, Ms. Roemer introduced Cornerstones, her first high jewelry collection in more than 10 years. The extra time in lockdown has been a creative boon, she said (“I always found the best pieces happen in the workshop when you don’t have a plan”) and the collection of nine pairs of earrings were muses on travel, with multifunctional pieces like sea-inspired blue topaz, aquamarine and diamond transformable earrings that Ms. Drew purchased. Ms. Roemer said she hopes to resume meeting clients from both brands, which, thanks to the pandemic, feel more complementary than ever. “It’s like having two babies — you can’t pick a favorite one, they’re equally important,” she said. “But also very different.” Source link Orbem News #Business #changed #jewelry #Pandemic #Roemers #Sabine

When her middle school closed in March, Garvey Mortley stopped going to lacrosse practice and playing drums in the school band. With so much time at home, she leaned into another interest: Roblox, an online gaming site and app with Lego-like characters and millions of virtual worlds to explore.

Sprawled on the floor of her living room in Bethesda, Md., Garvey began logging more hours in the online universe, building virtual houses, adopting digital pets and racing other players in obstacle courses. She said she now plays Roblox on her laptop for up to five hours a day while chatting with friends on her phone, up from an hour or two before the pandemic.

“It’s like my main passion,” said Garvey, 12. “It’s pretty diverse, and you can meet people around the world.”

The coronavirus has created some pandemic winners as people shop in droves on Amazon, buy Peloton bikes to exercise at home and head to drive-in movies. For children, there are pandemic victors, too — and chief among them is 14-year-old Roblox, which was already popular but has become wildly so since people have been urged to stay at home.

Since February, the number of active players on Roblox has jumped about 35 percent to reach 164 million in July, according to RTrack, a site that tracks Roblox data. About three quarters of American children ages 9 to 12 are now on the platform, according to Roblox. And players spent 3 billion hours on the site and app in July, twice as much as they did in February, the company said.

Inside Roblox, which is free to play, gamers create an avatar. They can play the site’s millions of games, bringing their character into environments ranging from tropical islands to haunted castles and bustling towns. Their avatars can engage in first-person combat, decipher puzzles or participate in egg hunts while chatting and interacting with other players. Gamers pay real money — often $5 or $10 at a time — to become premium members and to purchase an in-game currency called Robux, which lets them buy clothing, weapons and even hot air balloons for their characters.

“At a time like this, where people are housebound, being able to escape into the digital world and have these kinds of fun, imaginative experiences with a friend, is very, very relevant,” said Craig Donato, Roblox’s chief business officer.

For players, Roblox has an element of never-ending discovery because independent developers create more than 20 million new games a year for the platform. And for those developers — who are mostly teenagers, college students and young adults operating solo or with a small team — the recent spike in Roblox’s popularity means boom times for them, too, since they get a cut of the money that users are spending on their games.

Image

Anne Shoemaker, who develops Roblox games, said she has made about $500,000 through Roblox, most of that since March.Credit…Gabriela Hasbun for The New York Times

One beneficiary is Anne Shoemaker, 20, who said she moved from Palm Coast, Fla., to Silicon Valley two years ago with $100 in her pocket to live near other developers as she coded games for Roblox. For a while, she said, she didn’t earn enough from the platform to justify turning it into a full-time job.

But after the pandemic hit, Ms. Shoemaker saw a surge of interest in her two Roblox games, Mermaid Life, a fashion-focused role-playing game, and My Droplets, a pet simulation game. Players have paid for extra content in those games, and for the hats she made for users’ avatars that she sells across the site.

Ms. Shoemaker said she has now made about $500,000 through Roblox, most of that since March. Before the pandemic, she could afford to pay just one or two people to help her. Now her game studio, Fullflower Studio, employs 14 contractors and she is plotting new games.

“It feels incredible,” Ms. Shoemaker said. “People used to tell my mom, ‘Stop letting her play this video game; it’s not going to get her anywhere.’ And it’s getting me somewhere.”

Roblox said it has more than 2 million developers, 345,000 of whom make money and who split their profits 50-50 with the company. Dozens of the top developers make millions of dollars, the company said, and top games in the past have generated an average of $2 million to $3 million a year.

Revenue from Roblox’s mobile app, which most players use, totaled $493 million in the first half of the year, up from $228 million in the same period a year ago, according to SensorTower, an analytics firm. Roblox declined to disclose its financials, except to say it was cash-flow positive.

Roblox, which is based in San Mateo, Calif., was founded in 2006 by Erik Cassel and David Baszucki, who were engineers and entrepreneurs. Mr. Baszucki is the chief executive; Mr. Cassel died of cancer in 2013. The start-up has raised $335 million from investors including Meritech Capital Partners and the Chinese internet giant Tencent. In February, when it raised fresh financing from investors including Andreessen Horowitz, it was valued at $4 billion.

In the Roblox game Jailbreak, people’s avatars are prisoners attempting to escape from jail or are police officers trying to keep them imprisoned. Credit…Roblox

In Roblox’s early years, its growth was slow. But activity began picking up in 2015 and 2016 as technological tweaks made it easier to play on phones and Microsoft’s Xbox. Roblox has now become at least as popular as Minecraft, one of its main competitors, said Craig Sherman, a venture capitalist at Meritech.

Even with its recent surge in activity, Mr. Sherman said, Roblox is “on the cusp” of more growth. He said the platform has become a foundation for people to start businesses on, similar to YouTube.

“Roblox is becoming this generation’s version of going to the mall or downtown with your friends, and Covid probably helps accelerate that,” he said.

Some children who grew up on Roblox have never left. Alex Balfanz, 21, started coding games on Roblox when he was 9. In 2017, as a high school senior in Orlando, Fla., he released a Roblox game called Jailbreak, in which people’s avatars are prisoners attempting to escape from jail or police officers trying to keep them imprisoned.

Mr. Balfanz said he watched in astonishment as Jailbreak tallied more than 70,000 players at once on its first day. The game has now been played more than 4 billion times and makes several million dollars a year, which Mr. Balfanz said he splits with his business partner.

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Back to School ›

Back to School

Updated Aug. 14, 2020

The latest highlights as the first students return to U.S. schools.

In the pandemic, Jailbreak has reached even greater heights. Mr. Balfanz said that on the best days, the game has 80,000 to 90,000 people playing at once, compared with 40,000 to 60,000 before.

“It was a pleasant surprise, something I hadn’t really thought of happening in the midst of all the unfortunate circumstances brought by the pandemic,” he said.

With his earnings, Mr. Balfanz, now a senior at Duke University, said he has taken some vacations,paid his college tuition (Duke’s tuition is nearly $60,000 a year) and bought a Tesla. He has attained celebrity status on Roblox, and said he is swarmed by star-struck players whenever he logs on.

“It’s like my main passion,” Garvey said of Roblox. “It’s pretty diverse, and you can meet people around the world.”Credit…Andrew Mangum for The New York Times

But the dangers of the offline world have sometimes seeped into Roblox, including reports of extremist groups attempting to recruit children and the appearance of sexually explicit content in games.

Mr. Donato said that safety was Roblox’s top priority. The company reviews game content, has extensive parental controls and filters profanity and personally identifiable information out of chats, he said.

“We see all sorts of major real-life events, from Covid-19 to racial discrimination somehow impacting our platform,” he said.

Back in Bethesda, Garvey recently used Roblox to educate others on racism. When players participated in virtual Black Lives Matter protests in the game this summer, she noticed some were darkening their avatar’s skin color, ostensibly a statement of solidarity with Black people. But to Garvey, who is Black, it seemed more like “virtual blackface.”

Garvey urged Roblox players to dress their avatars in Black Lives Matter T-shirts instead of changing their skin color.Credit…Andrew Mangum for The New York Times

So Garvey made a YouTube video explaining the history of blackface in the United States and urged Roblox users to dress their avatars in Black Lives Matter T-shirts instead of changing their skin color.

“I took an educational route,” Garvey said. “I was trying to just seem a little helpful, not just angry at everyone.”

Garvey’s mother, Amber Coleman-Mortley, said she was proud of how Garvey reacted. She said she views Roblox as an ideal place for education, especially with in-person learning and socializing curtailed.

“Play is the way that the human mind learns best,” she said.

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summer qtr review/thoughts

buckle up kiddos its gonna be long -- this is mainly for my benefit tbh (tw for ed talk but as usual, no detail about behaviors)

but i feel like i tumbled less this summer and tbh i think that is ?? probably good

anyway

the quarter started off horrifically bad because i deteriorated a lot in florence. like, im so happy i went to florence and i experienced so many things and got so much braver and more confident, but i didn’t realize those positive effects until many weeks in, and they didn’t develop fully until i’d left

but i lost like..... at least 15 pounds without trying to or even realizing

surprise! italy is triggering for eating disorders....who knew....not this stanford-educated bitch right here....

anyway i was half dead when i got home to new jersey. i figured this summer i’d have to Actually Recover, and i’d dropped out of my program in south africa to be at stanford, catch up on my major, and get my shit together health-wise

That Did Not Happen, Unsurprisingly

having a disorder means.....the worse u get.....ur brain cares less about recovering....so I hit my lowest weight ever a couple weeks after getting back to ol’ stanf

it sukked cuz summer is triggering because it’s so beautiful and warm outside and like !!! shorts!!! crop tops!!! but anyway i hauled ass to the doctor to make sure i wasn’t going to die

she said “libby you are going to die very soon if you keep doing this”

but!!! that was the go-ahead i needed to flip the switch into Recovery Mode(tm) and i went to cvs the next day and bought hundreds of dollars worth of vitamins and supplements and safe foods because it was an Investment or whatever

and like......it’s been rocky. I’ve slipped up countless times. I gained 10 lbs in the first week and that was super scary lol so I relapsed, and then half-recovered from that, and since then it’s been a tug-of-war with the mental illness goblin

BUT that being said, the whole process has been kind of fun/motivating in a weird way, like I was a scientist and my body was the experiment, and I was just throwing data points into it and seeing what worked.

and ????? Some Things Worked !!! and it really awakens my sense of curiosity to see what things help me-- the nutrition and supplements helped my mood, energy, relationships (kinda? who knows what it would’ve been like otherwise), academics (same as relationships), confidence, etc. it even changed my personality i think, or at least minimized the things i didn’t like about myself and let me cultivate the things i like

like for example, i’m actually.....not an introvert i don’t think? i was talking to my mom about this yesterday -- she thinks she’s a 60/40 E/I and I’m the opposite, so we’re both ambiverts with different leanings. I identify as an introvert because I like solitary activities bc I’m used to being alone, but I realized this summer that.....being alone isn’t always good for me because it awakens mental illness goblin, but also I ??? really like talking to people and I’m good at conversations ??? I met lots of non-Stanf people from going out so much and it was always really refreshing and cool and I got energy from it....definition of an extravert

had conversations that really cemented my current values - got to talk about my classes and how much i loved them, how much the shallowness of bay area tech bothers me, how much i loved italy (florence is so hazy to me rn!! bizarre), regional differences in psychology (my passion tbh) and it just feels so good to care about things wow !! is this what it’s like to be neurotypical? no wonder yall are out there doin it

so I am not recovered in any sense of the word but I am so. much. better. I reduced a hella lot of behaviors, rarely felt depressed, and achieved pretty much everything i wanted, even though this was my sixth straight quarter of college and if i hadn’t done this self-imposed health regimen i don’t think i would’ve died, but i would’ve eroded and probably dropped out of school to go back to residential

should i be getting professional treatment? i think a lot of recovery blogs or experts would say yes, because they’re of the mind you can’t half-recover, and treatment comes before education, etc. and i don’t completely disagree and maybe once i graduate i’ll agree. but. i know that right now i want to be in school. i cannot fully recover on my own, but on my own is the only way i can get pieces of everything that i want. 

i’m healthier and happier because i made the best grades i’ve ever gotten at stanford (easy-ass classes for sure, but i’m still glad i performed as well as i possibly could. it’s a point of pride for me that even though my illness can get really severe, it’s never impacted my grades.) and i still did lots of really fun things! it was less social than last summer, where i went out every other day, but i still went to santa cruz beach boardwalk, an ed sheeran concert, a gay club in SF, SO MANY bars in downtown palo alto (at the point where multiple bartenders recognize me), a play in redwood city, coffee shops and dinner dates and sunlit morning walks to class listening to jukebox the ghost and happy-buzzed from green tea.

i’ll just say it, my fashion was kinda lit this summer....i was very physically confident, which is mixed because i might be romanticizing unhealthiness even though i am healthier than before. who knows. i am in transit

i feel like i didnt socialize as much this quarter with my actual close friends but instead met lots of one-time people and like, it was really nice meeting new people, bc when the people are always changing, i can see which elements of me stay the same. and getting to know who i am now is so interesting because tbh?? ive been through a lot this year (and also with, like, life) it’s so weird thinking of myself As A Whole when anything more than a year ago feels like a fever dream or made up story....anyway!

i did get to see my friends fairly frequently and i’m grateful for every time i did because i’m v lucky to have anyone in my life when i change as much as the fricken weather

my friends who loved stanford before are more over it now, and its funny bc i used to hate it but now im used to the school so i dont anymore. im a senior, i know the school well, ive been a member of so many clubs, been to so many on campus houses, explored the area extensively, taken a variety of classes….im not totally out of FOMO but its so reduced that im confident with what ive done there, and my ego isnt as threatened by other people bc i know i have my own kind of value. it doesnt matter if its objective or not bc how i feel is ultimately what matters

like its not all about what i feel if i dont do anything about it. but ive done some stuff! and im trying to make the shitty interpersonal stuff better! its going!

was able to read and write a little bit which is neaterino ! and i liked my job at the library, it was fun and easy

anyway if i think too much about it i’ll trip out because thinking about life sends me into existential despair, but this was a good quarter. up there with sophomore spring for my favorite/happiest/best feeling quarter? probably even better than soph spring because i was sick for most of the spring. every quarter has ups and downs and this was no exception but the downs didn’t feel as debilitating and the air didn’t feel like a fire blanket for once, and now that i have some strategies under my belt i can’t imagine things ever really getting that bad for a while

Dreemurr Academy #10 (UnderSwap Sans)

Dreemurr Academy, a prestigious closed-off college for monsters and humans alike of all ages and worlds. This includes myself, though I'm sort of an in-between. I'm Lynsie, the human anomaly. I'm a human, but I can do magic like monsters. I'm an oddball. That's the thing about making a school that is open to multiple alternate dimensions. Weird things are bound to show up. Even a bunch of the same person. From what I saw on orientation day, the same faces are scattered around all around. To fix these type of issues, everyone that has a multiple or doppelganger is given a school name so there's no confusion. Other than that, it's fairly normal. The hierarchy is the simple. The Deans are made up of the same people, skeleton monsters that go by the name of Gaster. One is a teacher of the Sciences, goes by Wingding. He's a kind and understanding man but is known to pull a prank or two. They all speak in a typeface sign language but use telepathy magic so others understand. It's been said no one has ever heard their real voices and those that have are no longer at the academy. Another Gaster dean teaches Home Economics, he goes by Wingy. He's a bubbly sweet guy that loves his work. Nothing makes him smile more than seeing the joy on a student's face when they take pride in being able to do something they first thought they couldn't. Another Gaster dean teaches the studies of Magic, he is called Fall. At times, he can be cynical, malicious, and sarcastic. He has a commanding presence that exuded gravitas, authority, and control, able to keep a class quiet without effort. Yet there is a kindness to him, it's rarely seen, but not unheard of. Another Gaster dean teaches History, his nickname is Dings. A cold, bitter, and sometimes childish man. He tends to hold grudges against troublesome students and is extremely spiteful toward those whom he dislikes. Yet those that can take his punishments are rewarded with his respect. He is a teacher that commands respect and whose grades are earned with doom hanging over your head. The Professors are also skeleton monsters, but not all are the same person. The Psychology professor is a guy named Papyrus but goes by Stretch. He's the favorite among students because he's so laid back. He chews a toothpick in class to suppress his urge to smoke, but we all know he does so when on break. He's really good at reading students and helps out when able. All in all, he's the cool teacher. The Literature professor is a Papyrus that is called Fell. He is the one teacher everyone dreads. Very strict and old-fashioned. He does not tolerate interruptions and will humiliate those he feels need to be taken down a notch. Such things take their toll on him and often squeezes a stress ball that he keeps on his desk. But he is a very passionate man when it comes to his work and takes his subject seriously, even though this makes him into a bit of a grammar nazi which is why many students get low grades. The Biology professor is a skeleton called Sans that sometimes goes by Classic, whatever that means. He is very cheesy and comes off as lazy, making puns that have people cringe yet secretly love them. He is very protective of his students and will go out of his way to help them. He does not tolerate bullying of any kind and can be quite scary. He's the second favorite among the students. The Physical Education professor is also a Sans that goes by Pain. He is also a stern and old school type of teacher, only he tends to be crueler in the humiliation of students that are unprepared. While his scope is all around, he prefers the darker side of the study. Using borderline violence to weed out the weak that think taking his class is an easy A. There is mercy in his dojo, but it must be earned with blood, sweat, and tears. The Students are broken into four groups based on which part of the four years they are currently in. The first years are called freshmen. Second years are sophomores. Third years are juniors. And fourth years are seniors. There are some variations on this topic, but this hierarchy of college students is still readily recognizable by everyone. Me? This isn't my first rodeo but not my last. I'm a sophomore and have gotten the gist of who's who and what's what. I get along with students and teachers. I've always been a middle ground type of girl. I didn't come looking for friends, but they just seemed to find me. Funny enough, my buddies are the brothers of the professors. Stretch's brother is a freshman, his name is Sans but goes by Rascal. Fell's brother, also a Sans, is a sophomore like me and goes by Edgy. Classic's brother is a Papyrus, a freshman that goes by Papy. And Pain's brother is a sophomore Papyrus by the name of Slim. I've always been a tomboy. I prefer the company of guys. They're different and fun, even if they can be a bit odd sometimes. Rascal, as the nickname implies, is the school clown/prankster. He likes to test his limits and challenge authority, even dishevels his uniform to assert his individuality. He comes off as a slacker but secretly is very deep, clever, and loyal to a fault. He likes taking his brother's class so he can improve his skills with messing with people, mostly his brother as he disrupts his teachings when he sees a chance. Edgy is shy around new people and slow to open up, enjoying a laugh with friends when able. Though he appears weak or even nerdy because of his glasses, he is far tougher than he leads on. He doesn't take crap from anyone. When alone, he's angsty and borders on straight up angry. Getting a pissy attitude when annoyed. Like his brother, he is very passionate about literature and does his best to impress his brother, going so far as to become the teacher's pet. Papy is easily the most lovable guy in the whole school. Very cheerful and optimistic, he tries his best no matter what. He doesn't like conflict and tries to keep his brother out of trouble when the teacher pulls a prank. I find it sweet of him to take his brother's class even though he doesn't particularly enjoy it, just so he can stay close to him. Like I said, this guy is a lovable soul. Slim is easy going. He doesn't take things too seriously and never breaks a sweat over hard exams. The only thing that breaks his cool is his smoking, he really gets tense if he goes too long without his fix. He's incredibly smart and instinctual, good traits to have when dealing with his brother. While he does attend his brother's class, he merely does so as a request of his brother who likes to make sure he doesn't slack off due to not being challenged enough. All of them are oddly related to each other in some form. Gaster's, Papyrus's, and Sans's are brothers. Yet I see them all as different people. I value them. They're helping me even if they don't know it. I am not so confident in myself. I tend to isolate myself, go at things lone wolf style. It's how I've always been. Then I met them and slowly my world began to expand bit by bit. I'm still not comfortable with others. But with them, I can step out from behind my mask for a bit, and really be myself around them. Today is a typical day. Classes are boring as fuck! The material sounds repetitive. The same old same old, day in day out. God, the fatigue is heavy. Luckily, or unluckily, depends on how you look at it, I've found something that is keeping my attention. Rascal, my buddy and the king of school mischief, has been focusing his efforts more on me as of late. Now it's not like he's never done so before, oh no, he's tagged me good since my second year began. He's hit me with spitballs, whoopee cushions, kick me signs, the spring-loaded whipped cream pie in my locker, stealing my cell phone then changing all my ring-tones to something super annoying before calling during my most serious classes, and of course his most skilled trick...the up the skirt panty snapshot. He alone is the reason I don't really care for the uniforms. Girls have to wear skirts and I hate it! But lately, he's stepped up his game in a more annoying way. Each prank is something physically dirty. There's been explosive condiment packets, the homemade slime dump, and purposely messing up my chemical experiments so that they blow up. It's honestly gotten so bad that I pack extra clothes. Worse still is having to use the gym showers. Rumor has it they're haunted, but I call bullshit, the damn school is less than three years old, this isn't some sort of corpse party or some anime trope. But I will admit...I have heard some weird sounds when I shower there. Though today is gonna be different. Once a month I like to spend a solid weekend with one of my friends and coincidentally their brothers. During this time, we catch up on the little things, do some work, or just goof off. And this month it's Rascal's turn. I plan on getting some answers. Stretch always has my back, mostly because Rascal annoys the piss out of him when he tries to do his job. Wingy will also help if needed, he doesn't like misbehavior or finding out his family is doing something stupid. This leads up to now...Dinner time. "so kiddo...anything new?" "Not really sir." "please, we're not at school. you don't have to treat me like a teacher." "I know. It's just a force of habit. Really hard to break." "✌❄ ☹☜✌💧❄ 💧☟☜🕯💧 🕈☜☹☹ 💣✌☠☠☜☼☜👎📬 🕆☠☹✋😐☜ ✌ 👍☜☼❄✌✋☠ 💧⚐💣☜⚐☠☜ 🕈☟⚐ 💧☟✌☹☹ ☼☜💣✌✋☠ ☠✌💣☜☹☜💧💧📬" (AT LEAST SHE'S WELL MANNERED. UNLIKE A CERTAIN SOMEONE WHO SHALL REMAIN NAMELESS.) "UH...I'M RIGHT HERE. I KNOW YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT ME." "❄☟☜☠ ✡⚐🕆 💧☟⚐🕆☹👎 😐☠⚐🕈 ✋❄🕯💧 ☼🕆👎☜ ❄⚐ 💧❄✌☼❄ 💧❄🕆☞☞✋☠☝ ✡⚐🕆☼ ☞✌👍☜ 👌☜☞⚐☼☜ ✋ 🏱🕆❄ ❄☟☜ ☝⚐💧☟ 👎✌☼☠ 🏱☹✌❄❄☜☼ 👎⚐🕈☠📬 ⚐☟✏ 🏱✌☼👎☜☠ 💣✡ ☹✌🕆☝✌☝☜📬" (THEN YOU SHOULD KNOW IT'S RUDE TO START STUFFING YOUR FACE BEFORE I PUT THE GOSH DARN PLATTER DOWN. OH! PARDEN MY LAUGAGE.) "You're fine Wingy, believe me, I've heard worse." "⚐☟ 👎☜✌☼📪 ✌💧 🏱✌🏱✡☼🕆💧 💧✌✋👎📪 🕈☜🕯☼☜ ☠⚐❄ ✌❄ ❄☟☜ ✌👍✌👎☜💣✡📬 ✡⚐🕆 👍✌☠ 🕆💧☜ ⚐🕆☼ ❄☼🕆☜ ☠✌💣☜💧📬" (OH DEAR, AS PAPYRUS SAID, WE'RE NOT AT THE ACADEMY. YOU CAN USE OUR TRUE NAMES.) "Okay...Gaster. Wow, that takes getting used to." "YOU SAY THAT EVERY TIME." "sans..." "WHAT?" "don't be a smartass." Rascal just rolls his eyes and continues to eat as Wingy serves the rest of us. I'll give the guy credit, out of the four Gaster, Wingy is the best cook around. Though there is some talk of another skeleton that is looking to take on the job he has. My guess is he'll end up as a secondary professor or personal tutor. "💧⚐ 🏱✌🏱✡☼🕆💧📪 🕈☟✌❄ ☟✌✞☜ ✡⚐🕆 ✋💧💧🕆☜👎 ☞⚐☼ ❄☟✋💧 ✈🕆✌☼❄☜☼🕯💧 ✌💧💧✋☝☠💣☜☠❄✍" (SO PAPYRUS, WHAT HAVE YOU ISSUED FOR THIS QUARTER'S ASSIGNMENT?) "nothing much. just told them to give me an original paper in any psychological field." "YEAH. LIKE THAT'S SIMPLE." "You don't have a subject yet?" "YOU DO?" "I do." "mind sharing it?" "Only because you asked and it can tease you with waiting. I'm writing about the correlation of dreams having more effect/relevance on the conscious mind and not just the unconscious." "dang...now i am curious." "💧🏱☜✌😐✋☠☝ ⚐☞ 👎☼☜✌💣💧📪 ☟⚐🕈 ✌☼☜ ✡⚐🕆☼💧 👎⚐✋☠☝ 💧✌☠💧✍" (SPEAKING OF DREAMS, HOW ARE YOURS DOING SANS?) Rascal looks up at his older brother. "HUH?" "✡⚐🕆☼ 👎☼☜✌💣💧📬 ✌☼☜ ❄☟☜✡ ❄☼⚐🕆👌☹✋☠☝ ✡⚐🕆✍" (YOUR DREAMS. ARE THEY TROUBLING YOU?) "NO...? WHY DO YOU ASK?" "🕈☜☹☹📪 💧⚐💣☜ ☠✋☝☟❄💧 ✋ 👍✌☠ ☟☜✌☼ ✡⚐🕆 💣🕆❄❄☜☼✋☠☝ 🕈☜✌☼✋☹✡📬" (WELL, SOME NIGHTS I CAN HEAR YOU MUTTERING WEARILY.) Rascal's cheekbones color faintly and he averts his gaze. "I'M FINE." "⚐☟📪 ❄☟✌❄ ☼☜💣✋☠👎💧 💣☜📬 🏱✌🏱✡☼🕆💧📪 ☟✌✞☜ ✡⚐🕆 ☞✋✠☜👎 ❄☟☜ 💧✋☠😐✍" (OH, THAT REMINDS ME. PAPYRUS, HAVE YOU FIXED THE SINK?) "didn't need to. there was nothing wrong with it or any of the others." "☼☜✌☹☹✡✍ ✋ 💧🕈☜✌☼ ✋🕯✞☜ ☟☜✌☼👎 ✋❄ 👎☼✋🏱🏱✋☠☝ ✌❄ ✌☹☹ ☟⚐🕆☼💧 ⚐☞ ❄☟☜ ☠✋☝☟❄📬" (REALLY? I SWEAR I'VE HEARD IT DRIPPING AT ALL HOURS OF THE NIGHT.) I can't help but notice Rascal squirm and the cyan blush he sports is getting darker. Wonder what that's about. "LOOK, CAN WE JUST EAT AND NOT TALK FOR FIVE MINUTES?" We all give him a look. "WHAT?" "you know it won't hurt to get that monkey off your back." "I SAID, I'M FINE." "✡⚐🕆🕯☼☜ 👍☹☜✌☼☹✡ ☠⚐❄📬" (YOU'RE CLEARLY NOT.) "DROP IT! JUST DROP IT!" He storms off to his room. "⚐☟ ☝⚐⚐👎☠☜💧💧📬" (OH GOODNESS.) Stretch stands. "i'll go talk with him." He follows after Rascal, leaving Wingy and me. "✋ 👎⚐ ✌🏱⚐☹⚐☝✋☪☜ ☞⚐☼ 💧✌☠💧📬 ✋ 👎⚐☠🕯❄ 😐☠⚐🕈 🕈☟✌❄🕯💧 ☝⚐❄❄☜☠ ✋☠❄⚐ ☟✋💣 ☹✌❄☜☹✡📬" (I DO APOLOGIZE FOR SANS. I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOTTEN INTO HIM LATELY.) Lately? "So this has been going on for some time?" "🖂💧✋☝☟🖂 ✋ 😐☠⚐🕈 ☟☜ ☠☜☜👎💧 ☟☜☹🏱📪 👌🕆❄ ☟☜ 🕈⚐☠🕯❄ ❄☜☹☹ 🕆💧 ✌☠✡❄☟✋☠☝📬 ✋❄🕯💧 ✈🕆✋❄☜ 🕈⚐☼☼✋💧⚐💣☜📬" (*sigh* I KNOW HE NEEDS HELP, BUT HE WON'T TELL US ANYTHING. IT'S QUITE WORRISOME.) He frowns in concern and it gets to me. I get up and go behind him, surprising him with a hug. "If anyone can make him talk, it's Stretch." "✋💧 ✋❄ 🕈☜✋☼👎 ✋ 🕈⚐☼☼✡ 💧⚐ 💣🕆👍☟✍" (IS IT WEIRD I WORRY SO MUCH?) "No, it's understandable. You care. There's nothing wrong with that." He smiles and pats my arm. "✡⚐🕆🕯☼☜ ✌ ☝⚐⚐👎 ☝✋☼☹📪 ☹✡☠💧✋☜📬" (YOU'RE A GOOD GIRL, LYNSIE.) "I try." I let him go and rub his skull childishly. "You're adorable Wingy. I'm gonna go see how those two are doing." "☝⚐⚐👎 ☹🕆👍😐📬" (GOOD LUCK.) With that, I depart from the table and enter the hall towards their rooms. I get close to Rascal's room but stop just before it in front of the bathroom, his door is closed but I hear voices. "bro, seriously, what's wrong? you've been acting funny more than usual. and not the 'ha ha' type of funny that we know you for." "I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!" "is this about those dreams you've been having? if you just tell us what's up then maybe..." "OKAY! JUST STOP ALREADY. *sigh* I'VE BEEN HAVING... ERM, CONFUSING DREAMS LATELY." "what sorts of dreams? nightmares?" "NO! NOT BAD ONES! JUST...UNUSUAL I'D SAY..." "how unusual? we are talking about dreams here." "MAYBE IT'S BEST IF I TELL YOU..." Rascal clears his throat. "FIRST I'M STANDING SOMEWHERE. I DON'T KNOW WHERE. I'M ALL ALONE, BUT I'M HAPPY; I'M EXPECTING SOMEONE. WHEN THE PERSON I'M EXPECTING ARRIVES, WE TALK. I DON'T REMEMBER THE SUBJECT NOW." "well you need to try and remember what happened if you want me to really hear what you think, but so far it doesn't sound so strange." "YOU SEE, THE STRANGE PART IS...IT'S WHAT HAPPENS LATER." "okay...what happens?" "WE GO TO MY ROOM AND I...I'M SORRY I CAN'T TALK ABOUT IT!" It doesn't take me long to figure out what kind of dreams he's been having. It's actually kind of cute. But really now, who's the certain someone? "bro, those kind of dreams are normal. there's nothing to worry about in having them." "BUT THE PERSON I MEET...I DON'T KNOW IF IT WOULD BE APPROPRIATE." "why do you feel like that? what's wrong with his dream lover?" "OKAY, ONE...DON'T EVER USE THOSE WORDS AGAIN. AND TWO, DON'T EVER USE THOSE WORDS AGAIN." "noted. but go on. why is the love of your dreams inappropriate?" Rascal swallows audibly. "NO, THAT'S NOT THE POINT...I MEAN...MAYBE...JUST...JUST FORGET ABOUT IT. I'M FEELING A BIT TIRED. DO YOU MIND IF WE TALK SOME OTHER TIME?" "oh, no, you're not wriggling out of this that easily. you should come clean and confess; you'll sleep better with the burden off your conscience." "IT'S SOMEONE CLOSE!" Well, now, that's intriguing. Someone close huh. Bet it's that odd bunny chick, she always seems to eye the bone boys. Best quit while I'm ahead before I get busted. Though I do still feel a little curious, I decide to go back and help Wingy. Stretch comes back sometime later, crashing on his lounger and chilling out to Jeopardy. He tells us things will be okay and we kind of have no choice but to believe him. Wingy, still concerned, decides to bake something that he thinks will cheer his little brother up. Which is a great idea...till a freak blender accident makes a splattering mess. Thank god I planned for this, god I'm too used to this by now. "❄☟☜ 👌✌❄☟☼⚐⚐💣🕯💧 ✌☹☹ ✡⚐🕆☼💧 👎☜✌☼📬 ✌☝✌✋☠📬📬📬✋🕯💣 ✌💣 💧⚐ 💧⚐☼☼✡ ✌👌⚐🕆❄ ❄☟✋💧📬" (THE BATHROOM'S ALL YOURS DEAR. AGAIN...I'M AM SO SORRY ABOUT THIS.) "It's fine. No damage was done. Hell, at least it was tasty." "✡⚐🕆🕯☼☜ ✌☹🕈✌✡💧 ☹⚐⚐😐✋☠☝ ⚐☠ ❄☟☜ 👌☼✋☝☟❄💧✋👎☜📬 ❄☟✌❄🕯💧 ✌ ☝⚐⚐👎 ❄☼✌✋❄📬" (YOU'RE ALWAYS LOOKING ON THE BRIGHTSIDE. THAT'S A GOOD TRAIT.) Wingy fusses with my hair playfully as he leaves to his room for the night. "eh. i guess i'll get some shuteye too." "Like you didn't already. You nodded off before final Jeopardy." He chuckles as he too gets up. "maybe, but it's not like the answer was super important." "It wasn't. Then again, I didn't hear it either. Too busy being caked on. *giggle*" He walks by me as I gather up my sleeping clothes. "hey, kiddo..." "Yes, sir?" He gives me a funny look and then smiles. "don't stay up too late." "I'll try. But I make no promises." With that, he leaves and I make my way into the bathroom for a quick shower before bed. Ah, there's nothing like the feel of warm water and the scent of lavender shampoo/conditioner to soothe the soul before bed. That plus it's a great way to get excess baking batter off the body and out of my hair. Soon enough though, I start hearing something. It's like the odd sound I'd hear in the academy showers, only a bit louder. Is it... Is it coming from Rascal's room? That bony butt hole! Has he been messing with me when I'm in the showers?! That dingus! Oh, I am so gonna give him a piece of my mind. I cut the water off, grab one of their bathrobes before my mind forgets I'm nude and make it to his door all flustered. I'm just about to rage grab his doorknob when suddenly I hear a faint moan. "OH...LYNSIE." Wait...Is he... no, he couldn't be. I sidle up to the door, pressing my ear against the wood and start to listen intently. "DAMN IT...WHY'D SHE HAVE TO BE HERE? CURSE MY DREAMS...OH, LYNSIE. IF ONLY YOU KNEW..." Now blushing and my curiosity teased, I decide to take a little peek through the lock; I have to verify that this is really happening. I press myself against it as best I can, looking through into the bedroom beyond. True to what my ears heard, I find one of my best friends in deep focus on more...carnal matters. Naked from the waist down, he sits on the edge of his bed, glowing cyan member in hand and enthusiastically stroking himself off. "AH! THE THINGS YOU DO TO ME...THE THINGS I WISH YOU WOULD DO TO ME...AH..." He groans to himself between pants and moans. The distinct sound of fapping of a hand slapping is quite audible from where I am. He whimpers softly and bites his lower jaw, clearly nearing the brink. Holy shit...This is for real. This is beyond a curious development. He's developed a crush on me? He thinks I'm attractive? Well, now...um...this is awkward. I should give him the chance to finish himself off. But I feel I need to head in and talk to him. Argh! I hate choices! Okay, calm down. Let's let fate decide. If his door is unlocked, then I go in. If not, I go to bed. I mentally count to three and very carefully turn the knob...the door is unlocked. I black out for a moment, but when my brain restarts I see that without missing a beat, I've opened the door and stepped in right in time to see a sticky rope of goo dribble onto the floor as he scrambles to cover himself up. "LYNSIE! W-WAIT, I CAN EXPLAIN! I SWEAR I...I...OH, GOD!" He hides under the covers of his bed, his skull blue with shame. I shake my head of the red flooding my cheeks. I slowly shut the door before approaching the hiding skeleton and sit at his bedside. "Dude...You like me?" Rascal peeks from under his covers. "YOU...YOU MEAN YOU'RE NOT MAD AT ME?" I tilt my head confused. "Mad? For what? Hell, if anything I'm at a loss for why you do like me." "REALLY?" "Yeah. Not saying I'm not flattered to be the object of your desire. Because frankly, I need the self-esteem boost. But there's no need to hide yourself or these feelings. If you felt this way about me, you should've just said so." I finish with a smile and he visibly relaxes, letting the covers fall on his chest. "I'M SORRY. I JUST...I WASN'T SURE HOW TO GO ABOUT THIS." "Is that why you've been pounding me with so many pranks?" "YEAH. I'M NOT PROUD OF THAT." "That's for sure. That's how boys get girls in elementary school. Or at least, that's how TV makes it out to be." "I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. IT'S TOO EMBARRASSING TALKING TO MY BROTHERS ABOUT PERSONAL STUFF." "You could've talked to me." "YOU'RE JOKING, RIGHT? LIKE I COULD REALLY TALK TO YOU ABOUT IT." "R-man, it's me we're talking about. You know I wouldn't judge you." "I JUST COULDN'T, OKAY! NOT AFTER WHAT I DID. WHAT I SAW." What does that mean? "Rascal? What are talking about?" He hides behind his hands and trembles faintly. "I FOUND A MANTANICE PATH UNDER THE BUILDING. I WANTED TO USE IT TO AVOID CLASSES AND PULL OFF EVEN BETTER TRICKS. SO I HAD TO CHECK WHERE THEY LEAD. ONE WAY HAD A LOOSE WALL BEAM AND I FOLLOWED IT. IT WENT PRETTY FAR. THEN A RAT SPOOKED ME. I TUMBLED AND SMACKED THE WALL. IT CRACK ON MY SIDE BUT CHIPPED A BIT ON THE OUTSIDE, NOTHING NOTICEABLE. TO MAKE SURE I WASN'T NOTICED I LOOKED THROUGH THE HOLE AND SAW..." "Saw...?" "...PROMISE YOU WON'T HIT ME." I don't like where this is going. "I promise." "*gulp*...I LOOKED IN THE HOLE AND SAW...THE SHOWERS." It hits me like a ton of bricks. "You..." "BEFORE YOU FREAK OUT, WHICH IS TOTALLY UNDERSTANDABLE, PLEASE HEAR ME OUT! IT WAS A COMPLETE ACCIDENT. ...THE FIRST TIME." My eye twitches. "First time?" "IT'S JUST THAT...WELL...SEEING YOU THERE, ALL COVERED IN SUDS WITH WATER CASCADING OFF YOU...*shudder* I COULDN'T HELP MYSELF." He regrets that as soon as it leaves him and I glare at him. "Oh my god..." "REMEMBER, YOU SAID YOU WOULDN'T HIT ME." "You are the biggest freaking dork ever! I should be beating on you like a xylophone!" "WAIT!" "What? Give me one good reason I shouldn't hold this over you like a hangman's noose?" "BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!" I blank at those words. "Wha...?" "I SAID, I LOVE YOU." Realizing he said those words and seeing the look on my face, he recoils, hiding his face once more inside his covers. "THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT. NOW YOU HATE ME. MY GAL PAL HATES ME AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO." I hear sniffling and my eyes widen. Dear lord, he's going to cry. I must fix this. I pull the covers off his face and throw myself at him in a hug much to his confusion. "L-LYNSIE?" "I don't hate you, you goofball. How can I hate you? You're my friend. My recently emotional and horny friend. I can't be mad at you for how you feel. I just want to help." He shakes a little, even as he cautiously puts his arms around me and breathes in relief. "I'M SO SORRY..." "I forgive you." "THANK YOU." "So...We cool now? No more crazy pranks? Or impromptu shower peepshows?" "YEAH. I PROMISE TO STOP." "Thanks." I give him a nuzzle and he rubs my back. "HEH...KNOW SOMETHING FUNNY? I'VE JUST NOW NOTICED YOU'RE IN MY ROBE." "Sorry. I grabbed the closest one when I got out of the shower." "NO, IT'S OKAY. ...IT LOOKS NICE ON YOU." I blush, thinking this must seem so coincidentally intimate. "T-thank you." He runs a hand through my still wet hair. "I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU SAID YOU NEED A SELF-ESTEEM BOOST. YOU'RE SO BEAUTIFUL. ONLY IN MY DREAMS CAN I HOPE TO BE WITH YOU. I'M...I'M JUST ME, AND YOU...I DIDN'T THINK SOMEONE LIKE YOU COULD EVER..." He trails off somewhat sadly and I kiss his cheek to lift his spirits. "You're over thinking it. If you relax, then things will be fine." He smiles fondly. "LYNSIE...CAN I ASK YOU SOMETHING?" "Sure." "CAN I...KISS YOU?" "R-really?" "JUST THIS ONCE. I WANT...I WANT TO END THIS NIGHT WITH SOMETHING THAT WILL MAKE MY DREAMS EVEN SWEETER." "Okay. But no funny stuff." "WOULDN'T DREAM OF IT." "Then why do I feel you crossing your fingers?" "HEH HEH, OKAY, YOU CAUGHT ME. BUT I WON'T TRY ANYTHING. I SWEAR." I give a small chuckle before sitting up. Doing so opens the robe a tiny bit but it's enough for him to see some skin and get his bones sweating. I don't notice as I lean into the distracted bone boy and gently lay my lips to his quivering smile. Initially, I intend the kiss to be only a quick peck, but then it lasts for several seconds and then longer. I can't really explain it, but once we made contact, something in me did not want this feeling to end. Realizing I've yet to pull away, he softly returns the kiss and kneads his hand into the back of my head. His other hand trails up my arm, feeling its way down the slope of my back and test touches the hill that is my rear. When I still don't move away he gets bolder. The hand on my ass retreats to my hip, where it rubs into me before tugging on the robe's sash. And that's when I finally break the kiss. "Rascal?" "I, UM...TOO MUCH?" I look away sheepishly. "HEY...WHAT'S WRONG?" "...I...I'm a virgin." His eyes widen. "YOU TOO?" We share odd looks before laughing. This must look adorable, especially because we're acting like hopeless virgins. This explains so much. "So..." "YEAH..." "Do we...You know...?" "ARE YOU SUGGESTING THAT WE...AND THAT I...PUT IT IN YOU?" "We could. It's an option." "YOU SURE? I MEAN, NOT THAT I DON'T WANT TO! OF COURSE, I'D SO DO THAT TO YOU. I MEAN WITH YOU! ARGH! I SOUND LIKE SUCH A CREEP." "Just a tiny bit. But in a cute way." "YOU THINK I'M CUTE?" "Well...Yeah. You're cute." "...LET'S DO THIS." "You sure?" "YES. I'M TIRED OF BEING SHY VIRGIN ABOUT THIS. IF OUR RELATIONSHIP HAS ESCALATED TO THIS CURRENT LEVEL, I WANT TO MAKE IT REAL. I WANT YOU TO BE MY FIRST. MY ONE AND ONLY. WILL YOU BE WITH ME TONIGHT LYNSIE? PLEASE?" Damn him and his love. In a short time he's made me annoyed, mad, and then filled with butterflies. I slip off his bed and begin stripping off bathrobe, leaving me bare much to his excitement. "I TAKE THIS AS A YES." "Come on, funny bones, play fair. You've seen me plenty of times. Now it's your turn." He shyly does the same, slipping off his nightshirt until he is laying in his bed completely bare-boned. "OK...HOW DO YOU WANT TO DO THIS?" "Hmmm...Good question. I believe we both know how this works, correct?" "YES, I KNOW WHAT PART OF ME GOES WHERE IN YOU." "Then maybe the standard way would be best. Sound okay?" "SOUNDS LIKE A PLAN TO ME." He gets off his bed and I teasingly take his place on the bed, looking up at him as he comes crawling back to be on top of me. The reaction is almost instantaneous; Rascal's magic made shaft immediately grows fully erect. "Whoa. You sure that'll fit?" "I'M SURE IT'S SUPPOSE TO. SURELY IT WILL. ...I HOPE AT LEAST." He laughs in nervousness. The broken ice of the room somehow reforming with awkwardness. This has us waiting for a short while and things get a little tense. "So...This is sex?" "N-NO...I HAVEN'T...IT'S NOT IN YET." "No offense, but...why not?" "...I'M SCARED. I DON'T WANT TO HURT YOU." "Awww..." "DON'T 'AWWW' ME." "But you're so adorable." "I DON'T WANT TO BE ADORABLE. I'M A MAN. I'M MAGNIFICENT." "Okay mister man, be all bad boy if it makes you happy. But unless someone does something soon, neither of us are going to be feeling good anytime soon." "ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT, I GET IT. JUST GIVE ME A SECOND." He breathes through his nose hole a few times before kneeling between my legs, aligning the tip of his shaft with my opening. He looks at me, waiting for me to confirm that he should indeed get going. I gently smile and nod. He smiles right back at me and finally begins easing himself inside. Rascal nervously begins to push his surprising warm member inside, timidly inserting an inch or two and then withdrawing, as if unable to bring himself to fully penetrate me. I groan at the initial intrusion and sigh as he pulls out. This is going nowhere fast. Bothered by his impromptu teasing, I decide to take charge. "You okay? I thought you wanted this?" "I-I'M SORRY, IT'S JUST...I'M NOT USED TO THIS, YOU KNOW?" His eyes are downcast, and I'm certain I can see him blush in humiliation. "IT...IT'S SO OVERWHELMING TO FINALLY BE WITH SOMEONE, NEVER MIND SOMEONE LIKE YOU." Giggling at his sweet hesitation, I gently take his hands in mine and guide them around my side, making him hug me. He doesn't need much encouragement to comply, easily snuggling against me, breastbone to actual breast, and sighing softly. "I'M SORRY. I JUST WONDER WHY YOU'D EVEN BOTHER DOING SOMETHING LIKE THIS, WITH SOMEONE LIKE ME." There's sadness in his voice and I don't like it. "Please don't be such an idiot." "HUH?" "Give yourself some credit. I like you. So forget about your insecurities. Because the more you think about it, the worse it's gonna get and I really hate seeing someone I care about unhappy. So cheer up. Or do I really have to be the one to pop our cherries?" Judging by the prodding I feel on my leg, I don't have to say anything more as he gently aligns himself with my sex and lets out a gruff huff when he suddenly thrusts himself forward, embedding himself in me to the hilt. This has me gasp and squeak in shock at the painful pinching sensation of the sudden intrusion, it's like something very girthy being shoved into the eye of a sewing needle. I cling harshly to my skeletal lover, my nails clawing at his bones. Panicked and in a bit of pain himself, he does what he can to ease me. Some light kissing here, some kind words there, it all gets to me eventually yet I still can't help but tease him. "*grunt* See? N-not so difficult now, w-was it?" "N-NOT DIFFICULT, NO. *groan* BUT HARD, ALL THE SAME." Did he just make a joke? "Heh...A poke and a joke, what better way to charm a girl. But unless you expect me to do all the work, the two of us won't get anything done if you just sit still." "YOU'RE ENJOYING TEASING ME, AREN'T YOU?" "Only a little bit. Just trying to tempt you into getting your head in the game and not worry so much." "VERY WELL. HERE GOES NOTHING." With that he promptly makes himself busy, awkwardly thrusting in and out, pumping in a clumsy attempt to please us both. While I do appreciate his enthusiasm, just randomly thrusting isn't really giving me all those 'seeing stars' feelings everyone always says they get in sex and I will be damned if I have this first time be a complete letdown. "Sans, can you stop for a moment?" Hearing me say his name makes him do so instantly and he blinks curiously. "DID I HURT YOU? AM I DOING SOMETHING WRONG? I'M SORRY!" "Calm down, you didn't do anything wrong, and you certainly didn't hurt me." "SO, WHAT'S WRONG THEN? I'M NOT DOING THAT BADLY, AM I?" "No! No! Y-you're doing fine!" He pouts. "YOU DON'T HAVE TO LIE TO ME." "I'm not lying." "*sad sigh* THIS IS SO MUCH EASIER IN MY DREAMS." "Hey, for the last time, you're doing fine. I just wanted you to stop so I can try something." "OH?" Rubbing his spine, I shall attempt to guide him through the process. Grasping on the base of his spinal cord, I begin sliding my hand up and down in slow tender strokes. He shivers out moans at the pleasure flooding his sensitive bones, but it doesn't stop him from catching on; indeed, he proves himself a quick study and starts to preempt my 'instructions'. Moving his hips in deep tender pumps, taking time to feel all there is and yet still find new spots that feel even better. Now, this is so much better. "I-I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW INCREDIBLE THIS IS, LYNSIE. YOU'RE SO WARM AND WET INSIDE." He begins murmuring such sweetness to me, too caught up in the sensations of sex to really flatter me, though I enjoy it all the same. "Oh yeah...That's the stuff. See, you're doing fine. Mmmm...So damn fine~ Ooooh Sans~." You moan alongside him, singing praises to him being a quick study, letting go of his spine and grabbing onto his bony shoulders instead, giving him a few more directions so he can catch some spots that feel extra sensitive. Suddenly he clenches up and gasps, moaning several times and arching his back before he can't hold it back anymore and climaxes inside of me, filling his sticky magic goo. I moan as he fills me with his magical essence, then immediately sigh in disappointment as he slumps down on top of me and nuzzling against my cheek tenderly. "THAT WAS INCREDIBLE." "Yeah..." "HEY, WHAT'S WRONG?" "Nothing." "WAIT...DIDN'T YOU CUM TOO?" I can tell in his voice that he's curious yet sated. That means he'll keep asking until I say something. "I don't know. I guess I just didn't have enough time to get to that point." "REALLY?" "But it's okay. It did feel good for the time it lasted. And I'm happy to have made you feel so good." "YOU MEAN, I DIDN'T...? NO. HELL, NO, THAT'S NOT ACCEPTABLE!" He growls and to my surprise, I suddenly feel his flaccid member swelling once more inside me. He takes a dominating mount above me, grabbing onto my shoulders and starting to thrust himself hard into me once more. I groan in as much surprise as there is pleasure, bracing myself against Rascal as he begins fucking me with as much enthusiasm as when we started. I'm genuinely impressed. This is not something a newcomer to sex should be able to pull off. But screw that. I decide to thank and congratulate his dedication with a hot passionate kiss. He promptly redoubles his efforts, while trying to kiss me back in appreciation of the gesture. I begin to lose myself in the pleasure and closeness of this most powerful act. Slowly I start to feel a pressure build in my loins, and, if anything I've ever heard or read about is true, I know this as a sign that it won't be long before I finally achieve the oh so desired orgasm. Rascal himself lets out a cry of relief; having finally achieved his goal in helping me to orgasm, this means he can give in to the sensations he himself is being overwhelmed by, spraying my insides with a second coating of magic goo spunk, dredging up every last drop left. With a groan, he sinks down atop me, his orgasm pushes me over the edge, moaning out his name and my insides contracting trying their best to milk the poor skeleton of all the magic love goo he is worth. Then with one last spasm, I slump down against the bed and his shaft deeply embedded inside me slowly fades away unable to maintain form, some of our mixed juices running down to mat his bed. He lays there with me, panting softly from the exertion then somehow finds the strength to give me a weak yet cheeky grin. "SO, HOW WAS I THIS TIME?" "*flirty giggles* To quote you from earlier...That was incredible." "MYEH HEH HEH...GLAD TO HEAR IT. TO QUOTE YOU...I AIM TO PLEASE." "Mmmm...That you did~. You really surprised me. I didn't expect you to be able to get a second erection so quickly, especially after you just came." "WELL, I'VE LEARNED A FEW TRICKS AT THE ACADEMY FROM SOME OF THE MORE, UH, RESTRICTED TEXTBOOKS, SHALL WE SAY?" "Oh?" "NOT ENOUGH THAT I CAN DO ANYTHING MAJOR, BUT ENOUGH FOR...SOMETHING LIKE THIS..." His cockiness assures me he's back to his normal self. But I still can't help but tease my prankster lover. "Rather clever of you to bone up on such studies. But I wonder...What reason would you have for picking up this one particular talent, my dear friend?" He rubs the back of his skull bashfully. "A GUY CAN DREAM OF FINDING THAT SOMEONE SPECIAL SOMEDAY, CAN'T THEY? AND YOU KNOW WHAT THE BOY SCOUTS SAY, 'BE PREPARED'." "You, my fine fellow, are no boy scout." "SO TRUE. BUT YOU'RE STILL HERE AND HAVING A GOOD TIME ALL THE SAME." "That I am." I snuggle him in content. "Bet you're happy I came over now." He flinches. "YOU..." "I may have been naughty and eavesdropped while you were chatting with Stretch." He chuckles and nips at my ear. "SUCH A BAD GIRL YOU ARE. I DON'T KNOW IF I SHOULD PUNISH YOU OR PRAISE YOU." "Heh, all I know is, that next time we do this I expect at least four more performances like this." His eyes bulge at my suggestion, half in fear and half in lust. "I...I CAN'T POSSIBLY DO THAT! I MEAN, I DON'T HAVE THE ENERGY." He declares, swallowing audibly and averting his eyes much to my amusement. Grinning, I pull him into the final kiss of the night, reassuring him this is just something for him to think about. Having said that, I gather our clothes and redress before joining him once more in bed, staying together the rest of the night...But I do have one question though. "Hey Sans..." "YEAH?" "What do you do with all the photos you take of up my skirt?" He flinches so hard it shakes me. "UH..." "You don't do anything weird with them, do you? Like, sell them?" "WHAT?! NO! NEVER! I WOULD NEVER PART WITH ANY OF THOSE MOUTH WATERING SHOTS OF YOUR GLORY. THOSE ARE FOR MY EYES ONLY." "Then what do you do with them aside from beating your magic meat to them?" "WELL I CERTAINLY DIDN'T USE THEM TO MAKE SOME SORT OF SCRAPBOOK FILLED WITH PICS OF YOUR LOVELY ASSETS, THAT'S FOR SURE." We just look at each other. "It's under the bed, isn't it?" "MAYBE." "Wow Sans. Just...Wow." "HEY...IN MY DEFENCE...YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSE TO KNOW ABOUT IT." "Oh my god, Sans." "SORRY." "Don't be..." I hug the goofy bonehead. "Never be sorry for being yourself. Because I like you as you are. Perverted numbskull and all." "AWWW..." [Meanwhile: the hallway] Stretch walks past his younger brother's room with a bottle of honey in one hand and a smirk on his face. He bypasses his own room to slip a note under his older brother's door before returning to his room for the night. The note is simple and only states this..."The dream has been worked out".

SUNSHINE IN YOUR SMILE 1

pairing: sugamon

genre: fluff, a japanese pinch of angst, summer school!au

word count: 1.7k

description: min yoongi gets to spend the coldest summer of his life in school, but maybe hot mess kim namjoon can warm him up.

note: this is my first time writing fanfiction, so please offer your suggestions ! 

| Part 1 |

Yoongi was sure it was going to be the bleakest summer of his life. First of all, the days had been maintaining depressingly lukewarm temperatures of no more than 21°C though it was now well into early July. In every other year, it would be hot enough to fry his dog on the asphalt by this time of year. But today, he was tugging on his thick, dark hoodie in order to stay alive on the frigid 6:30 AM bus that would bring him to class.

Min Yoongi, high school senior, resident rebel and misunderstood teen, was doing summer school.

✺

“Namjoonie! You’re taking this class too?”

The tall brunette turned to the desk behind him. “Hobi-hyung?”

When Namjoon applied for the thrilling college course of MAT 003A Analytic Geometry and Calculus I, he knew he'd be one of the youngest in class. Most incoming high school juniors were going on crazy trips, making the most out of their new licenses and last summer before college applications. However, Kim Namjoon believed that true enjoyment came from the refreshing experience of learning new . He was a first class dweeb, but at least he wasn’t alone.

“I didn’t expect you would take such an early class,” Namjoon said. Hoseok’s expression immediately dropped to one of mild disgust. Judging by his lazy black HBA sweatshirt and the thick knit headband keeping his messy faded orange hair off his face, he probably didn’t either.

“I know, right? But I’m teaching more classes at the dance studio since it’s summer. Gotta make it rain, ya feel?” 

No, Namjoon did not feel, but he nodded anyway. “So, are you still doing only the class for little kids—”

He was cut off by a figure in black slamming a bag onto the desk next to Hoseok’s. It was a boy shorter than him, and thinner too, with a black cap pulled low on his forehead and a “fuck-off” expression on his face. He did not seem excited to be here.

Hobi, however, was elated. “Ah, Yoongi-hyung! To be honest, I didn’t think you’d show up.” 

Yoongi sank heavily into his seat and shoved his face in his arms with a groan. “I didn’t think I’d come either,” he mumbled, “but I failed calculus last semester so I have to pass an accredited course to make it up.” Hoseok pat his friend on the back sympathetically and looked back at Namjoon, who’d been awkwardly regarding the interaction.

“Yoongi-hyung’s my best broski! He’s gonna be a senior,” the dancer explained. “He’s kinda really done with everyone’s shit, you know?”

“Ah,” Namjoon replied understandingly, though he did not know as he was barely a junior. He adjusted his fashionable Steven Spielberg glasses to subtly express his intellectual capacity. Perhaps this coming school year would cripple his spirit, and he’d be able to relate.

✺

“Oh sweet Jesus,” Hoseok yawned as the three exited the classroom at 11:20 AM sharp. “My stomach has been eating itself for the past hour. I’m gonna grab something from the snack shack. Do either of you want to come?”

“Nah, I’m okay,” replied Namjoon, taking out the honey chips he had so thoughtfully packed from his backpack. “I'm heading to the bus stop.”

“Me too,” muttered Yoongi incoherently, trudging alongside Namjoon. Upon discovering the first class would only be covering review from precalculus, the smaller boy had slept through the entire four hours and was currently still very groggy.

They made their way to the bus stop in silence. Namjoon had not touched another chip since they had split from Hobi, because he was very self-conscious of his crunching. Instead, he turned toward Yoongi and offered him the bag.

“Want some? They're really good.”

Yoongi glanced up at him, then took a chip.

“Thanks.”

“No problem, Yoongi-ssi.” Now that they were side-by-side, Namjoon could see that the senior was almost a full head shorter than him. He was so pale he sparkled a little in the sun, like a vampire from a poorly-written teen fiction novel. It was kinda cute, but his resting bitch face was intimidating.

They boarded the bus together and sat in the back.

“What stop do you get off?” asked Namjoon, attempting to fill the obvious void of silence between them. Hoseok had said Yoongi was his “best broski”, so the awkward junior felt obligated to attempt a friendship.

“In four stops. Key and Madison.”

“Ah, I’m only three away.”

There was no response from Yoongi. Namjoon was now very uncomfortable, so he said 'screw it’ to conversation and stared aimlessly out the window for the rest of his ride.

✺

“I want to gut myself alive.”

“I would feel bad for you,” Hoseok started, “but you did kind of ask for it. You probably shouldn't have slept through the week.”

“Don't fucking lecture me, kiddo,” snapped Yoongi. “How was I supposed to know our first test is this week?”

“You have the syllabus.”

“Well I lost it so fuck off.”

Hoseok did not seem particularly offended by the snarling. “He gets like this when he's stressed,” he explained to Namjoon. He turned back to Yoongi. “You should go to the tutoring center or something. They're open until 4 on school days.”

“I have to work until 4. There's no way I could get off early enough to get here in time.” Yoongi grabbed his backpack, ready to take off. “Whatever, it's just one quiz. It can't hurt my grade that much.”

“Maybe not, but it's a group grade. I don't want my grade to drop because your irresponsible ass decided to snooze through the last five lectures, and I'm sure Namjoonie feels the same.” Hoseok sighed. “Well, I can't help you either. I'm literally deceased after herding those hyper little kids in the toddler class.”

Namjoon cleared his throat. “I, uh, I could review with you. I don't really do much in the summer, so I'm free anytime. Maybe we could meet somewhere.” He suddenly felt incredibly embarrassed. Yoongi probably thought he was annoying for butting in. “I mean, only if you want to.”

Yoongi stared at him. The way Namjoon would glance down and puff his cheeks when he was nervous was kind of really adorable.

“Sure, kid. Is the café tomorrow at 6:30 okay? The one near here.”

“Sounds good.”

✺

When Namjoon stepped into The Grind, the hipster café home to the world’s first avocado and hemp cold brew, at 6:28 the following evening, he saw Yoongi was already at a booth. He was hunched over his laptop, looking swallowed up by his double layering of an embroidered satin bomber jacket over a black Stussy hoodie. His unruly black hair stuck out haphazardly under the hood and framed the matte horn-rimmed glasses he wore. Even from 20 feet away, Namjoon could see the life-repelling glare on his face.

Namjoon moved to sit across from him. “Uh, hey Yoongi-ssi,” he managed, heavily intimidated by the man's irritated expression. Yoongi glanced up from his computer.

“You’re friends with Hobi, right? Just call me hyung.” He closed his Macbook and set it to the side, against the dark, aesthetic planks on the wall. “What do you want to order? It’s on me.”

“No, it’s fine, I can—”

Yoongi cut him off. “I’m repaying you for tutoring me.”

Namjoon didn’t want to be annoying and push, so he let him pay for his disgustingly basic Caramel Ecstasy. He was flipping through the textbook when Yoongi shoved the drink at him.

“Don’t start. I’m not mentally prepared for this shit yet,” he muttered around the environmentally-friendly biodegradable paper straw of his own iced Americano. “Let’s just talk for a bit, ‘cause you and I both know this is awkward as fuck.“ He propped his chin up with one hand and stared across the rustic wooden table.

Namjoon panicked.

“Yeah, uh, I’m really bad at making small talk on the first date.” His face paled when he realized what he just said.

Yoongi narrowed his eyes. “Did you just call this a date?”

“Yes? No? I mean, technically yes, but I meant a date as in friends. A date between bros. A dude date, you know, it’s not like we’re gay or anything.”

When he noticed he was the loudest one in the room, Namjoon stopped and smiled through his cringe. He was seconds away from vomiting. That was the most mortifying spiel he had ever uttered and his chance to even befriend Yoongi was now probably in the negatives.

The tension had become unpleasantly obvious, and after a few seconds, Yoongi set his hand down.

“Well, I’m not gay. But I do like guys, so if you have a probl—”

Namjoon choked on his coffee, drawing attention to himself once again with his second shameful act of the day. 

“NO! I’m perfectly fine with that, man. I’m friends with gay people. I love gay people. Sometimes, I even wanna be gay!“

By now, he wasn’t even trying to feel better. Within a little more than half an hour, Namjoon had managed to embarrass himself more than in the rest of his entire life. But Yoongi didn’t seem offended.

The brunette was snickering. “Alright kid, whatever you say. Let’s just get to the math now. You’re a hot mess.”

Not just a mess, but a hot mess? Was Yoongi hitting on him? Ignoring his flushed cheeks, the younger boy pushed his textbook to the center. “Okay, so I was thinking that we begin with chapter three, since that’s wh—”

“Are you gonna teach me upside down? I can’t read shit if you’re across from me.” Yoongi shoved his bag off the rest of his bench. “Sit here.”

Reluctantly, Namjoon moved over. This was not good for his soft 16-year old heart, which pumped a little faster when he realized this was the first time he was seeing Yoongi so closely. When he leaned over to check the boy’s work, Namjoon could smell a faint, minty trace of his shampoo and noticed the adorable, kittenish way Yoongi scrunched his nose when he was solving a tough question.

Under the warm glow from the café’s whimsical Edison bulbs, Namjoon, who sometimes wanted to be gay, fell a little bit in love.

A Dance in Fire v3

A Dance in Fire Chapter 3

by Waughin Jarth

✲•······················▃🖋️······················•✲

Mother Pascost disappeared into the sordid hole that was her tavern, and emerged a moment later with a scrap of paper with Liodes Jurus’s familiar scrawl. Decumus Scotti held it up before a patch of sunlight that had found its way through the massive boughs of the tree city, and read.

Sckotti, So you made it to Falinnesti, Vallinwood! Congradulatens! I’m sure you had quit a adventure getting here. Unfortonitly, Im not here anymore as you probably guess. Theres a town down rivver called Athie Im at. Git a bote and join me! Its ideal! I hope you brot a lot of contracks, cause these peple need a lot of building done. They wer close to the war, you see, but not so close they dont have any mony left to pay. Ha ha. Meat me down here as son as you can. Jurus

So, Scotti pondered, Jurus had left Falinesti and gone to some place called Athie. Given his poor penmanship and ghastly spelling, it could equally well by Athy, Aphy, Othry, Imthri, Urtha, or Krakamaka. The sensible thing to do, Scotti knew, was to call this adventure over and try to find some way to get back home to the Imperial City. He was no mercenary devoted to a life of thrills: he was, or at least had been, a senior clerk at a successful private building commission. Over the last few weeks, he had been robbed by the Cathay-Raht, taken on a death march through the jungle by a gang of giggling Bosmeri, half-starved to death, drugged with fermented pig’s milk, nearly slain by some kind of giant tick, and attacked by archers. He was filthy, exhausted, and had, he counted, ten gold pieces to his name. Now the man whose proposal brought him to the depths of misery was not even there. It was both judicious and seemly to abandon the enterprise entirely.

And yet, a small but distant voice in his head told him: You have been chosen. You have no other choice but to see this through.

Scotti turned to the stout old woman, Mother Pascost, who had been watching him curiously: “I was wondering if you knew of a village that was at the edge of the recent conflict with Elsweyr. It’s calling something like Ath-ie?”

“You must mean Athay,” she grinned. “My middle lad, Viglil, he manages a dairy down there. Beautiful country, right on the river. Is that where your friend went?”

“Yes,” said Scotti. “Do you know the fastest way to get there?”

After a short conversation, an even shorter ride to Falinesti’s roots by way of the platforms, and a jog to the river bank, Scotti was negotiating transport with a huge fair-haired Bosmer with a face like a pickled carp. He called himself Captain Balfix, but even Scotti with his sheltered life could recognize him for what he was. A retired pirate for hire, a smuggler for certain, and probably much worse. His ship, which had clearly been stolen in the distant past, was a bent old Imperial sloop.

“Fifty gold and we’ll be in Athay in two days time,” boomed Captain Balfix expansively.

“I have ten, no, sorry, nine gold pieces,” replied Scotti, and feeling the need for explanation, added, “I had ten, but I gave one to the Platform Ferryman to get me down here.”

“Nine is just as fine,” said the captain agreeably. “Truth be told, I was going to Athay whether you paid me or not. Make yourself comfortable on the boat, we’ll be leaving in just a few minutes.”

Decumus Scotti boarded the vessel, which sat low in the water of the river, stacked high with crates and sacks that spilled out of the hold and galley and onto the deck. Each was marked with stamps advertising the most innocuous substances: copper scraps, lard, ink, High Rock metal (marked “For Cattle”), tar, fish jelly. Scotti’s imagination reeled picturing what sorts of illicit imports were truly aboard.

It took more than those few minutes for Captain Balfix to haul in the rest of his cargo, but in an hour, the anchor was up and they were sailing downriver towards Athay. The green gray water barely rippled, only touched by the fingers of the breeze. Lush plant life crowded the banks, obscuring from sight all the animals that sang and roared at one another. Lulled by the serene surroundings, Scotti drifted to sleep.

At night, he awoke and gratefully accepted some clean clothes and food from Captain Balfix.

“Why are you going to Athay, if I may ask?” queried the Bosmer.

“I’m meeting a former colleague there. He asked me to come down from the Imperial City where I worked for the Atrius Building Commission to negotiate some contracts,” Scotti took another bite of the dried sausages they were sharing for dinner. “We’re going to try to repair and refurbish whatever bridges, roads, and other structures that got damaged in the recent war with the Khajiiti.”

“It’s been a hard two years,” the captain nodded his head. “Though I suppose good for me and the likes of you and your friend. Trade routes cut off. Now they think there’s going to be war with the Summurset Isles, you heard that?

Scotti shook his head.

“I’ve done my share of smuggling skooma down the coast, even helping some revolutionary types escape the Mane’s wrath, but now the wars’ve made me a legitimate trader, a businessman. The first casualties of war is always the corrupted.”

Scotti said he was sorry to hear that, and they lapsed into silence, watching the stairs and moons’ reflection on the still water. The next day, Scotti awoke to find the captain wrapped up in his sail, torpid from alcohol, singing in a low, slurred voice. When he saw Scotti rise, he offered his flagon of jagga.

“I learned my lesson during revelry at western cross.”

The captain laughed, and then burst into tears, “I don’t want to be legitimate. Other pirates I used to know are still raping and stealing and smuggling and selling nice folk like you into slavery. I swear to you, I never thought the first time that I ran a real shipment of legal goods that my life would turn out like this. Oh, I know, I could go back to it, but Baan Dar knows not after all I’ve seen. I’m a ruined man.”

Scotti helped the weeping mer out of the sail, murmuring words of reassurance. Then he added, “Forgive me for changing the subject, but where are we?”

“Oh,” moaned Captain Balfix miserably. “We made good time. Athay’s right around the bend in the river.”

“Then it looks like Athay’s on fire,” said Scotti, pointing.

A great plume of smoke black as pitch was rising above the trees. As they drifted around the bend, they next saw the flames, and then the blackened skeletal remains of the village. Dying, blazing villagers leapt from rocks into the river. A cacophony of wailing met their ears, and they could see, roaming along the edges of the town, the figures of Khajiiti soldiers bearing torches.

“Baan Dar bless me!” slurred the captain. “The war’s back on!”

“Oh, no,” whimpered Scotti.

The sloop drifted with the current toward the opposite shore away from the fiery town. Scotti turned his attention there, and the sanctuary it offered. Just a peaceful arbor, away from the horror. There was a shudder of leaves in two of the trees and a dozen lithe Khajiit dropped to the ground, armed with bows.

“They see us,” hissed Scotti. “And they’ve got bows!”

“Well, of course they have bows,” snarled Captain Balfix. “We Bosmer may have invented the bloody things, but we didn’t think to keep them secret, you bloody bureaucrat.”

“Now, they’re setting their arrows on fire!”

“Yes, they do that sometimes.”

“Captain, they’re shooting at us! They’re shooting at us with flaming arrows!”

“Ah, so they are,” the captain agreed. “The aim here is to avoid being hit.”

But hit they were, and very shortly thereafter. Even worse, the second volley of arrows hit the supply of pitch, which ignited in a tremendous blue blaze. Scotti grabbed Captain Balfix and they leapt overboard just before the ship and all its cargo disintegrated. The shock of the cold water brought the Bosmer into temporary sobriety. He called to Scotti, who was already swimming as fast as he could toward the bend.

“Master Decumus, where do you think you’re swimming to?”

“Back to Falinesti!” cried Scotti.

“It will take you days, and by the time you get there, everyone will know all about the attack on Athay! They’ll never let anyone they don’t know in! The closest village downriver is Grenos, maybe they’ll give us shelter!”

Scotti swam back to the captain and side-by-side they began paddling in the middle of the river, past the burning residuum of the village. He thanked Mara that he had learned to swim. Many a Cyrodiil did not, as largely land-locked as the Imperial Province was. Had he been raised in Mir Corrup or Artemon, he might have been doomed, but the Imperial City itself was encircled by water, and every lad and lass there knew how to cross without a boat. Even those who grew up to be clerks and not adventurers.

Captain Balfix’s sobriety faded as he grew used to the water’s temperature. Even in wintertide, the Xylo River was fairly temperate and after a fashion, even comfortable. The Bosmer’s strokes were uneven, and he’d stray closer to Scotti and then further away, pushing ahead and then falling behind.

Scotti looked to the shore to his right: the flames had caught the trees like tinder. Behind them was an inferno, with which they were barely keeping pace. To the shore on their left, all looked fair, until he saw a tremble in the river-reeds, and then what caused it. A pride of the largest cats he had ever seen. They were auburn-haired, green-eyed beasts with jaws and teeth to match his wildest nightmares. And they were watching the two swimmers, and keeping pace.

“Captain Balfix, we can’t go to either that shore or the other one, or we’ll be parboiled or eaten,” Scotti whispered. “Try to even your kicking and your strokes. Breath like you would normally. If you’re feeling tired, tell me, and we’ll float on our backs for a while.”

Anyone who has had the experience of giving rational advice to a drunkard would understand the hopelessness. Scotti kept pace with the captain, slowing himself, quickening, drifting left and right, while the Bosmer moaned old ditties from his pirate days. When he wasn’t watching his companion, he watched the cats on the shore. After a stretch, he turned to his right. Another village had caught fire. Undoubtedly, it was Grenos. Scotti stared at the blazing fury, awed by the sight of the destruction, and did not hear that the captain had ceased to sing.

When he turned back, Captain Balfix was gone.

Scotti dove into the murky depths of the river over and over again. There was nothing to be done. When he surfaced after his final search, he saw that the giant cats had moved on, perhaps assuming that he too had drowned. He continued his lonely swim downriver. A tributary, he noted, had formed a final barrier, keeping the flames from spreading further. But there were no more towns. After several hours, he began to ponder the wisdom of going ashore. Which shore was the question.

He was spared the decision. Ahead of him was a rocky island with a bonfire. He did not know if he were intruding on a party of Bosmeri or Khajiiti, only that he could swim no more. With straining, aching muscles, he pulled himself onto the rocks.

They were Bosmer refugees he gathered, even before they told him. Roasting over the fire was the remains of one of the giant cats that had been stalking him through the jungle on the opposite shore.

“Senche-Tiger,” said one of the young warriors ravenously. “It’s no animal - it’s as smart as any Cathay-Raht or Ohmes or any other bleeding Khajiiti. Pity this one drowned. I would have gladly killed it. You’ll like the meat, though. Sweet, from all the sugar these asses eat.”

Scotti did not know if he was capable of eating a creature as intelligent as a man or mer, but he surprised himself, as he had done several times over the last days. It was rich, succulent, and sweet, like sugared pork, but no seasonings had been added. He surveyed the crowd as he ate. A sad lot, some still weeping for lost family members. They were the survivors of both the villages of Grenos and Athay, and war was on every person’s lips. Why had the Khajiiti attacked again? Why - - specifically directed at Scotti, as a Cyrodiil - - why was the Emperor not enforcing peace in his provinces?

“I was to meet another Cyrodiil,” he said to a Bosmer maiden who he understood to be from Athay. “His name was Liodes Jurus. I don’t suppose you know what might have happened to him.”

“I don’t know your friend, but there were many Cyrodiils in Athay when the fire came,” said the girl. “Some of them, I think, left quickly. They were going to Vindisi, inland, in the jungle. I am going there tomorrow, so are many of us. If you wish, you may come as well.”

Decumus Scotti nodded solemnly. He made himself as comfortable as he could in the stony ground of the river island, and somehow, after much effort, he fell asleep. But he did not sleep well.

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