Transcript:
Here we go again, Baldwin Home AKA Black Screen AKA Mister I Wish You Would AKA Sovereign Community AKA Crysanth Kush AKA All the News That's Fit To Sprint Up To You In The Streets And Tell You What's Really Real, delivering another message to the masses:
You already know what it is!
And I don't mean that rhetorically. You ain't heard the news.
You lived it!
(from far away) Hey, Black, why do they call it the Bontive Valley?
(close to the mic) They call it the Bontive Valley ‘cause the harvests are high yielding. And bit by bit, they're coming back into hand.
We're talking more crops. We're talking our land.
After all, we worked it for
how many thousand years? For
how many glass Dukes? We cried
how many midnight tears?
It ain't worth it to do the damn calculus. They'll just tell us we needed to use trigonometry instead.
“Your numbers aren't right. It wasn't really exploitation.”
So let me do some simple subtraction:
Three minus three is dead.
Y’all sent out your shooters
from your crystalline castle
from your beige coloured campus
from your jewel-encrusted church.
Well, I got news, I’m the paperboy, open up
front page story
your shooters was flawed, your Duchess a fraud, and we're really, really them.
And I know what you're thinking.
I know where your mind's at.
You're ready to punch back. You’re gonna find out who caused you all of this pain.
Poor Stargrave, finger on the trigger
poor prophet, dig a little deeper
poor Mr. Entrepreneur,
we've opened a door
and you're facing it for
the first time
ever.
We made you imagine
a whole world
without you. Now, get this.
We do that
every
single
day.
And it ain't just a vision, it ain’t pipe dreams and conversation, it ain’t blue sky hypothetical, it’s really, really real. All that talk
all that violence yet our energy remains.
We're vibrant while you piss poor tyrants got tired just holding our chains.
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oh no I smoked too much weed and gave myself zoomies both from the excitement from my new peak pro and the excitement from the new weed itself and def smoked way more than I should have and probs will continue to smoke more than I should because of this double dose of excitement until I finally just pass out after days of hardly sleeping recently lmao
but ANYWAYS before that happens !!! I currently have the strongest urge to go wreck people in fucking battlegrounds to level one of my assorted disc priests and because like …. ever since I got 100k honorable kills achieve, I’ve wanted that goddamn fucking ‘the Bloodthirsty’ title from the 250k honorable kills achieve and I was farming that before I stopped having the drive to game a few months back.
so let’s see how queues go at 2am on a fucking Wednesday morning, I wonder if I’ll give up before I find a bracket with fast pvp queues tonight tbh. it’s more likely I’ll end up pugging a raid on my mistweaver main if it takes too long to get into a battleground just to preoccupy myself for a bit and try to get a chance at trinkets and shit lmao
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Peter really put his entire Franzussy into his role as the Koskelas and Ilmari and so much of his content and lines can be skipped or missed or is inaudible/drowned by other elements (other NPCs, FX audio) 😔
Like
Ilmo and Steven's conversation after talking to them (if you do) and Ilmo offering Coffee World VIP tickets and Steven politely refusing 😂
The Huotari evil well laughter 😈 vs the Huotari well sobbing 😭
Missing all commercials
Missing out on Yötön Yö
Ilmo's realization of Jaakko being dead (overruled by the gameplay and Scratch's threats)
Missing the option to talk to Ilmo post-jail sequence and thus not finding out that the Cult = actually good and MISSING ILMO's DEVASTATINGLY HEARTBROKEN "my brother"
Not knowing during Deerfest u can hang around and hear Ilmo say some very questionable lines in a very strange voice (though this is easy to miss becos the level is designed for Alan to GTFO of there)
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this tweet getting almost 200 comments and 1.7k likes on why people like gortash, ranging from intellectual thought pieces to "lmao have u seen his tits" HAHAHA
i just know gortie would be proud of gortash nation
so why do YOU like gortash? 🤨🎤
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