#he's a pious man
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Oui oui, Comte.
#hello comte#hello sexy#he's so stuffy#but i want to stuff him with chocolate#want him to lick chocolate off my fingers#and other places#didi chill lol#girl stop#he's a pious man#but i want to corrupt him#comte de reynaud#chocolat (2000)#my sweet alfredo#my heart#❤️❤️❤️❤️#alfred molina
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Giordano please! I want to see him and young Machete.
Giordano di Calabria, the future Archbishop of Naples, and his good-for-nothing apprentice.
#own art#own characters#CanisAlbus#Machete#Giordano di Calabria#fic Separation#anonymous#answered#Machete's former mentor and the closest he's had to a father figure#highly esteemed character in his circles#pious short tempered and heavyhanded man#he financed Machete's further studies when he was made an archbishop#but then grew to resent him when Machete surpassed him and became a cardinal#from tiny shrimpy kid to spindly and haggard adult
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comes barreling through the walls like KoolAid man
I HEARD WE’RE TALKIN ABOUT OUR LORD AND SAVIOR JOE BEAR GRAVES
YES WE ARE
Joe 'Bear' Graves who drives himself absolutely nuts and blueballs himself because he refuses to fuck you until marriage, but the thing is, you've only interacted with him during debriefs since your transfer to his base as a new hacker :((
Will lay in his bed, back slightly arching and legs kicking out as Joe lets out a deep, rumbly growl from his chest as he slides his palm down his belly to adjust his hard cock in his sweats and he hisses because his balls start to ache with how full they are and how pent up he is :((
But can you really blame him?? You with that perfect smile lighting up the whole room, your soft, smooth voice explaining the intelligence you managed to recover but Joe, as much as he regreted it and felt like the worst sinner, could only focus on your pretty light blue blouse that had a few buttons open and showed your cleavage off like a prize he couldn't obtain.
Your perfect, full hips swaying and together with your beatiful curves he swore you looked like a temptress send on Earth to get him to sin, and now here he is; in his bed all alone, constantly adjusting his dick in his pants as his balls ache to be emptied inside you while you have no idea what the man is doing, instead you're getting chatted up by his nasty cousin, Philip, who wanted to sink his teeth into your soft flesh the moment he laid his eyes on you♡
#kin speaks#asks#interactions#he's a pious man ://#but its his own fault that he got himself all worked up😭#cod x reader#cod mw x reader#six x reader#joe bear graves x reader#joe graves x reader#joe bear graves#joe graves#philip graves x reader#graves x reader
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pls plspls pleaseeeee a crimble of jordan, a spit a line of jordan i am thirsting for him so much you cant image and you’re teasing me about him ajsjshfjdhakd
Yahhh when you mention Jordan, Lya will immediately go back to her repressed phase :) girl only saw "it" in the retracted form and already knows how "it" will be in full glory...
Anyway... here's my current design of Jordan the Pious. Note that I'm still working on the clothes, but his hair and the hood will remain in the final design!
#long haired man got me realllllllll bad#dol pc#dollya ask#jordan the pious#dollya art#dol#side note: he's at the same height as Ivory Wraith
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criston grooming rhaenyra as a way to “save” her from her insane incestuous grooming family. th. the grooming is different when he does it okay
#his grooming is ‘good’ bc he is ‘good’#he is a good pious man unlike her evil heathen family#criston cole#asoiaf#my posts
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HOLY FUCKING SHIT ARTHURS SINGING VOICE HELP ME
….sir I’m listening ….respectfully ….I swear
#*insert I am a pious man meme here*#I get why the horrors are after this man#he only needs to give them the siren treatment and entities be crawling after him dayum#malevolent pod#malevolent#arthur lester#john malevolent#benevolent really isn’t pulling any punches huh?#benevolent
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Hamilton after Philip's death
#Man suddenly became a lot more pious after he remembered death was a thing#amrev#american history#american revolution#alexander hamilton#historical alexander hamilton#shitpost#meme
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i have writer's block and depression, so i have nothing major to post, but to cheer me up, i am giving you some slut era!jersey lore. <3
in rm!kyle's room, by the bed ( which, again, is a mattress on the floor with some navy target bedsheets on it; he's a whore, we know this ) / sometimes in the closet ( it depends how much ~stuff~ is in there )
there is a brown carboard box that has "Lost And Pound ;)" written on it in pink sharpie and big loopy girly #extra asf handwriting that bebe presented to fuccboi kyle one night as fun & fresh way to collect all the misc. articles of clothing, trinkets, invent-whorey items that his idiot boy hookups leave behind when kyle's done with them and they're being thrown out onto the street. <3
bc, usually, he'll give you likeeee thirty seconds to grab your shit and get out? but if you're too slow, sucks to suck...literally. so, as you can probably imagine, a LOT of boy belongings accumulate in there.
however, unlike an actual lost and found, if you forgot something, you cannot come back and get anything you accidentally left behind -- some boy left his nintendo switch and kyle threatened to Bludgeon Him with it if he so much as breathed in his direction again, lmaooo.
i'm so serious, like, if you manage to book a legendary jersey kyle session, one, congratulations, bc it was the lay of your life, two, i'm sorry because he's never going to call you, but most importantly three, once you pass under the too low, paint-chipped doorway into his room ( ky hits his head on it 25/8, it pisses him off so much )
— you better hope that once you exit out through that doorway ( or the window if kyle is Extra Irritated ) that you have anything you love and treasure On Your Person as you go, because once it's in the lost and pound, it's blondies property and if you try to talk to him OUTSIDE abt it??? ohhhh my God, dude, he will pretend not to know you, he will squint at ur dick, he will Embarrass and HUMILITATE you in ways that you will think about at your wedding, your child's first birthday party, every xmas...jersey will chew you up and spit you out.
ergo?
don't try it.
anyways! i got sidetracked. so where i was going was that while no pathetic idiot worm boy kyle sleeps with is allowed to reclaim his missing shit, sheila taught kyle to be a ~resourceful king~, so kyle just offers the Objects Of Rejection up to marj, bebe and tweek to use for various art projects. ex. if tweek is painting but doesn't want to get paint on his clothes, he can use a lost and pound shirt, if bebe wants to do a fashion girl thing, she can use a flannel as scrap fabric, tbh sometimes marj sews patches into her skirts/makes aprons/uses socks & stuff as rags when she's doing cleaning around the house.
i'd call the l&p a slutty college boy good will, but it's more of a...
Bad Won't
...if you will. ;)
well, whatever the case, kyle is evil and unsentimental and refuses to create any sort of accidental attachments to said stupid boy things, so everyone can do what they please with the lost and pound items.
usually it's just clothes, but sometimes they get Good Shit like air pods once??? omg??? one time they got a cellphone, an apple watch!!
boys do leave their car keys and you'd think kyle would be nice and give them back, but...kyle is Naught Nice, lol, so if ur lucky he'll say something like "go long, football boy" and chuck them out the window and if you are Unlucky, he'll call you on the burner cellphone from a past lost and pound experience and make you listen to your car keys getting absolutely demolished by the garbage disposal <3
...he's just so Sweet, isn't he?
luv u jers xx ;)))
tldr; lost and pound supremacy! the gayng do be grabbin a hoodie from the l&p when they're freezing bc they late paying the electric bill, doing artsy stuff or just bc they think a shirt is cool. speaking of,
i think there was a crimson dawn teeshirt in there once...
Interesting.
-uncle nina, finders keeper of the j.k. lost and pound <3
#i fucking love the lost and pound#this has no relevance#this was just to make me laugh bc i am sad#i love constantly reminding everyone that jers is a reformed slutter outter of boys a wh0re a floozy a skaaaaaaaaaank#he is my hero#by the streets for the streets#if it gets 2 full they do go to good will with the bad cant things#they do sell duplicates of expensive stuff they get#NOT THEM MONETIZING JERSEY KYLE BEING A HO#like the way bebe and kyle are just hustling i love them#i am sorry but if you leave a credit card#he will be using it#so u better cancel it and like dont try and dispute the charges kyle is a lawyer but oh my god he will lieeeeee akshdksd#anyways i love u evil kyle my beloved my baby#FUN FACT RAVEN DID ACCIDENTALLY SEE IT ONCE IN KYLES ROOM#HE KICKED THAT SHIT INTO THE CLOSET SO FAST#LIKE DONT WORRY ABT THAT LOL!#no one tell raven of crimson dawn i’m a wh0re#a pious man of god
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"I didn't cheat."
"You did just a little bit."
"I didn't have to."
OKAY GIGI WE GET IT YOU WANNA TOP THE ANCIENT WARRIOR VAMPIRE CONTROL YOURSELF MAN
#HIS SMUG LITTLE SMIRK#HOLY FUCK GUILLERMO IN THIS EPISODE#I AM A PIOUS MAN NO TEMPTATION CAN STRAY ME FROM THE PATH OF GOD#EXCEPT GUILLERMO WHEN HES CONFIDENT#FUCK#wwdits#wwdits spoilers#what we do in the shadows#nandor the relentless#nandor x guillermo#nandermo#guillermo de la cruz#everybody say 'thank you harvey guillen'
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i love that the TLK movie kinda implies that england becomes the christian majority country it will be in small (but significant) part because aethelstan — considered by modern historians as its first king — was a gay man who believed that his piousness would absolve him of his sin. even believing in the movie that spreading christianity would balance out his sin of sodomy... inspired by a pagan man (masquerading as a christian — as a holy man at that—) he was so besotted with he was willing to choose said man over his country. the concept of it all... incredible creative vision.
apart from the tragedy both political and personal in the actual movie, there is something so strikingly meta-tragic about the story's implication of generations upon generations of future queer suffering happening because a powerful gay man believed he was powerless under the chrisitian god. obviously i don't know if this was intentional because the movie ends after uhtred pledges northumbria to the king so we don't know for sure what TLK aethelstan would have done afterwards. but the historical and fictional implications are still there and boy are they juicy
#like the more i think of it the more i truly am like. damn i'm so glad he was a self-hating gay man in the movie#because as fun as it would be to have him gay but not agonized over it#that wouldn't have been as interesting personally. maybe in a different‚ more modern story but not here#like i get that TLK aethelstan had more of a chance to not be high-stakes gayngsting due to having uhtred#but bringing in the aspect that he was known for being pious and a promoter of christianity in history#was a better addition vs. not acknowledging that facet#like showing him as a girlbossing (gaybossing?) king whose sexuality didn't define him and his story#(had the writers chosen to still write him as gay) would have made a much weaker character to me personally#if ever anybody in fiction had the rights to a gayngst story it's the first king of england#because of again. the implications!!#man it's so fun to write about TV shows again#ku blarghs#the last kingdom: seven kings must die#sorry for tagging if this isn't welcome
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On His Knees
#that first gif is kinda funny to me#the way he got on his knees#like okay comte#the last gif is kinda hot#i kinda wish his shirt was open in the last gif though#i'd be on my knees too#but not to pray#girl stop#he's a pious man#but i want to corrupt him#comte de reynaud#chocolat (2000)#my sweet alfredo#my heart#❤❤❤❤#alfred molina
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تهدمت والله أركان الهدى...قُتِلَ علي المرتضى
The Earth trembled and the seas surged,
A heart wrenching cry from the angels in the Heavens emerged,
“By God! The pillars of guidance has been destroyed!
The stars of the sky and the flags of piety has been obscured!
The beloved of God has been struck!
The guardian of the true faith has been struck!
The prince of believers, the father of the orphans,
'Ali Al-Murtadha has been martyred!”
Drops of sacred blood fell from the poisoned sword;
and upon the stained prayer mat,
he made his final prostration to his Nurturing Lord.
The orphans were left waiting,
but all they could hear were the sounds of anguished cries and wailing.
Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 42, p. 282
#imam ali#a man so pious and fearless#he could only be attacked while praying to his Lord#O what wretched betrayal#O what beautiful martyrdom
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If I may ask, buuuuuuut.... are you accepting asks about Joe Bear Graves? 😳
YES JESUS CHRIST YES
If you have any ideas for him PLEASE give it to me, I'm literally biting through concrete walls for this man oh my god-
#kin speaks#asks#interactions#ik he's a deeply religious pious man#but that just makes a weird corruption part of me go brrr#cod x reader#cod mw x reader#joe bear graves x reader#joe graves x reader#joe bear graves#joe graves#six
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Broke: Trevor is a sassy bastard to Hector in CoD because that's just the way he is
Woke: Trevor is a sassy bastard to Hector in CoD (at least partially) because of the curse
Bespoke: Trevor is a sassy bastard to Hector in CoD because he has a big fat crush and doesn't know how to deal with it
#the same logic can be applied to Isaavor btw#(or Dravor........ ;))#Trevor is discovering his bisexuality in Castlevania and it's TERRIBLE#HE'S SUPPOSED TO BE A PIOUS MAN !! WHERE ARE ALL THOSE FEELINGS COMING FROM#castlevania#trevor c belmont#trevor belmont#ralph c belmont#hector castlevania#curse of darkness#local bastard
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I love it when I go to make a stupid meme about a certain character and then I just. . Stare for waaay to long and end up feeling foolish. . I wish to blame anyone other than myself, but 'tis I with the wandering eye. . A meer crow tempted by a shiny quarter (´-﹏-`；)
#yes this is about Meph cause apparently I can't not post about him#he's just so purple and sometimes green with levels of scrunkle that can't be unseen#I AM A PIOUS MAN#mea culpa
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Misterican Religion || The Holy Tenants of Tiamat
Misterican is a theocracy that is divided in two sections of power. The first being that of the Royal Family, bringing about their reign era known as an Age. (Aurinko's reign was "Age of the Eclipse" ) The second being that of the Religious Council that was headed by the leader of the church, know in Misterican Religion as the Piipsa (Bishop). The current reigning Piipsa at the time of Misterica's fall and before Aurinko's reign was a name by the name of Hopea Sumu (Silver Fog).
It was the Piipsa's job to not just uphold the word of the Celestial Mother and manage the Misterican religion but also to deliver her word to the people. The Misterican religion surrounded the prophecy of the birth of a child of Salvation, known to them as The Child of White -but also the creator their realm (the heavens and the skies) and the source of all Mist and Mist souled life formed. This creator's name was Lady Tiamat, known to the Mistericans as "The Celestial Mother".
Within the space of the Misterican Religion there were Nine Holy Tenants said to be given by Tiamat, herself and they were rules that she expects her child - the Sky Children - to abide by.
The Holy Tenants of Tiamat are:
"Thou shall not take life unless there is no other option"
"Thou shall honor family and the home."
"Thou shall give blessing to the sky and the world around us."
"Thou shall honor what we consume."
"Thou shall speak from the soul through the passions of the heart."
"Thou shall give blessings to the Celestial Mother for all she has given us."
"Thou shall seek peace within ones self for the benefit of all"
"Thou shall honor the moon and the stars for they are the Celestial Mother's gifts to us."
"Thou shall honor all children of the sky in equality."
These tenants were considered to be a path to guide one's life around and they were expected to be upheld by all of Misterican Society. The Holy Tenants were considered laws just as much as laws sat by the Royal Family's half of the Government were. For a Misterican to break a Holy Tenant was seen as a grievous dishonor and it ran the risk of the Celestial Mother no longer accepting their Mist back into the nature from whence they came when their life ended and their body passed.
So Mistericans upheld the Holy Tenants with extreme devotion and carried them in their hearts as guideposts for conducting themselves in everyday life.
#the mist in my soul || headcanon#topic: misterican government#topic: misterican culture#topic: misterica#topic: misterican religion#topic: tenants of tiamat#topic: misterican religious council#topic: tiamat#tw; religion#// i cannot avoid religion with this culture#// sorry Kumo is extremely devout and most Mistericans were#// their religion is less faith and more fact anyway#// tiamat legit exists and she shares a body with Kumo#// So I mean the man has a reason to be PIOUS AS FUCK as he is
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