PROMPT : ASSORTED PROMPTS / ACCEPTING
@ilesule sent [ naoya ] : [ TOUCH ] : while touching the receiver’s waist, the sender’s hand briefly dips beneath the hem of their shirt, skimming briefly across the bare skin of their waist.
the breath he lets out is shaky, his face flushes a deep crimson at naoya’s ministrations - what they had was a nameless thing, there have been times where he was yanked off to the side, hidden behind the heavy drapes by strong hands and pressed against the cold stone walls with that amused smirk all for him to see. how the other drank the soft sounds that escaped him at the teasing touches in their hungry kisses to the point where zagreus couldn’t get a word in. the heat that ignites deep within him entices a groan to escape him when naoya’s teeth catch on his lower lip.
the other’s hand already slipping into his chiton, it’s a bit of a messy exchange, especially when the removal of clothes are involved and zagreus’ chiton gets in the way of greedy digits daring to scour the planes of his body. but when naoya’s fingers touch his waist, they’re cool against his naturally burning skin. zagreus moves his hand, putting the other’s gesture on hold as zagreus looks at him with a brow raised.
❛ shameless. ❜ he utters against soft, but slightly chapped lips, ❛ in the hall? anyone could see us here, ❜ he adds, ❛ my chambers. now. ❜
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@yeonban : ❛ you’re not alone. i’m here. ❜ & ❛ don’t touch me. get away from me. ❜ a frown, hand finding its way into his hair / an attempt at refraining, abstaining, not killing. ❛ don’t look at me like that. ❜ / accepting.
Aether always said — she never saw the bigger picture. That was what he was for, though. She trusts too quickly, believes too much in others, and it always hurts her more when she is abandoned or betrayed accordingly. She is a creature built for bonds, incapable of surviving alone — alone, alone — and it is too easy for her to build her self around another person, her life around another person. If the god - girl cannot trust herself to survive, then — she must find something or someone she can trust.
The world broke them of that bad habit / or it is trying to. Kaeya’s playful using — Childe’s lightless eyes — Zhongli using them to fill the gap his godhood left — Albedo looks at them and sees something to study — Ayaka is so gentle when she manipulates them into dying for her fight — Kokomi makes her a tool — she has been used or betrayed too many times to fall into trust’s old habit, to believe that any love her, truly. She no longer trusts, as she no longer smiles, as she no longer breathes.
But —— it’s an old, millenia - old habit, and Lumine is so tired, and Lumine is so tired exhaustion itself often drives them to tears, and she needs to believe that it is possible to be something other than in pain / which is to say, alone. To be alone is killing her / a blade in her gut / she wants to believe that it isn’t foolish, to accept the kindness when Tarquin offers to remove the knife. He does, and it hurts to be loved, it hurts to be un - alone, but he bandages where the lonely once was and the wound scars and Lumine is still dead empty sterile light and little else, but she isn’t alone, but she trusts him, but she feels safe. She wakes from a nightmare sobbing and he holds her close, a hand brushing through her hair, promises he’ll keep her safe, promises he loves her, promises, “you’re not alone. I’m here.” And she believes him.
Stupid, stupid thing. She believes him.
———
Aether always said — she never saw the bigger picture. The end of the story was obvious, and she didn’t see it, because she needed to believe that it was possible to be something other than in pain or the fear of another fucking day this miserable would have killed her on the spot. Hatred of god overwhelms love of her, as she should have known it would, and how stupid she was to believe him, to think that anyone in this world would ever see anything more than a frightening tool, and Tarquin re - sheathes the blade he once removed, more serrated this time, in their gut.
She wonders, blood in her throat, how many times she’ll have to learn this lesson.
———
The world broke them of that bad habit / and no longer has to try to. Kaeya’s playful using — Childe’s lightless eyes — Zhongli using them to fill the gap his godhood left — Albedo looks at them and sees something to study — Ayaka is so gentle when she manipulates them into dying for her fight — Kokomi makes her a tool — TARQUIN KNOWS SHE WILL DIE IF SHE IS MADE THING AGAIN / TOOL AGAIN / ALONE AGAIN and abandons anyway. Because no one on this world cares if Lumine dies, not really, and she should have known that. She did know that. She no longer trusts, as she no longer smiles, as the blood in her veins is no longer either gold or red.
And Lumine didn’t mean to come to Dragonspine.
A bad dream / they always have bad dreams when they’re stupid enough to sleep, stupid, stupid girl / and Lumine doesn’t mean to come to Dragonspine, they’re just panicking, they’ve just forgotten how to breathe, they’re just a creature built to love and be loved and the only times they have ever been anything close to safe in the last several months has been on this freezing mountain / and they don’t mean to be here, where the man they love and the man who hates them resides / and they don’t mean to be here, beneath his anxious gaze, his furious gaze, his hate - filled gaze / and they don’t mean to be reaching for him, they’re just so afraid and the only times they have felt anything close to safe in the last several months has been in his arms / and he hates them, he wants them dead, and he has abandoned them, just as their brother has, just as everyone on this world has / and he is killing them, just as ——
“Don’t touch me,” he hisses, and she stumbles in her reaching, falls forward onto her knees in the snow, eyes flat and empty, hair whipping around her face, her huge yellow eyes, “Get away from me.” It’s almost lost to the wind, a storm, Lumine didn’t even notice, Lumine never notices, they didn’t see that Childe wanted to break them and they didn’t see that Ayaka would tell whatever tricks she had to and they didn’t see that Tarquin would leave them even though they should have known. They were weak enough to want to be alive, they were weak enough to want to stop hurting, they were stupid enough to take the trap. Lumine stares up at him, lips parting just barely, and whatever story her face tells must be an ugly one, her wide eyes and painpainpain that’s not even hurt, because she should have seen this coming, because she can’t even be angry at him because it’s her fault for being stupid enough to trust at all, and whatever story her face tells must be an ugly one, because Tarquin — who hates her — snaps, “Don’t look at me like that.”
And Lumine is not built to survive alone, he doesn’t know how, and this hurts more than dying, this being - alone, this cavernous - grief, this pathetic - empty, and it’s all her fault, for being so stupid as to believe him when he said THEY’RE NOT ALONE.
Their hands tremble in the snow. The pain reaches a fever pitch. They break.
There’s nothing else to do, the pain that is cannibalizing them every fucking second is so sharp and so loud and it has to come out somehow. They scream, curling smaller, hands fisting in the cloth around their stomach, around the blade he once removed and then returned, where the lonely sits, bleeding slow, where the pain sits, killing slow, and she screams, and it’s not fair. And isn’t that petulant, it’s not fair? Because Lumine can’t survive alone and that’s all they’ve ever been in this fucking world no matter what stories they’ve told themself, but they’re not allowed to die while others can still use them, so they just hurt, they just hurt, they just hurt every moment and are abandoned over and over and they thought Tarquin might be different, and they trusted him, and the blade hurts worse now. The scream fades to a wail, a sob. They’ll die if this pain doesn’t stop. Or worse, they won’t.
And isn’t this petulant, this agony giving way to sobs in the snow?
Their arms slam into the snow and the rock beneath and they can’t feel the cold, and they don’t feel anything except pain, and it doesn’t even matter because by the time their head lifts, tears frozen on their cheeks, Tarquin’s chosen to leave them again.
Eventually, the corpse that no one loves rises, shaking, and leaves.
———
Paimon asks if she’s angry at Tarquin. Lumine shrugs, eyes half - lidded, dark circles going bruise - like, and only - barely feels the knife shift when she sits.
“My fault for believing him.”
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@elegaia / cleo & barbara!
“If he was still alive, I’d have put a curse on him.” It’s a joking offer, and clearly not a real threat; Cleo is protective of those she’s chosen to care for — has, quite literally, cursed more than a few for giving Ghoulia a difficult time — to the extreme, but she knows too well that the handful of times Deuce or Ghoulia have threatened her father on her behalf have stung more than soothed.
Besides. While she’s sure she could ask Frankie or Ghoulia to revive the deceased Pegg patriach to kill him again, the fact of the matter is that that’s so much work. Much better use of their time and Cleo’s father’s money to buy and then use expensive and mostly - placebo ( or all - placebo, in Cleo’s case, given that she hasn’t really been alive for over five - thousand years ) at - home skincare. And what else do you do at a sleepover aside from facials? Cleo finishes smoothing the sheet mask onto Barbara’s face as she adds, “Just a little one, promise.”
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