Tag People You Wanna Get to Know Better

Tagged by the wonderful and lovely @lans-rabbit-glade 😊💖! Thanks for tagging me izzy! I loved reading your answers :)

Relationship Status: It’s just me here (single pringle)

Favorite Colors: Pink & Red

Song Stuck in My Head: Do I Wanna Know by Arctic Monkeys… I’ve listened to that song probably a million times and I’m still not tired of it nor will I ever be 💖. I’m definitely not looping it for writing inspiration or anything (also izzy I see your song choice and I am tempted to roast you for being a mobile gamer 😜)

Last Thing You Googled: “There’d Better Be a Mirrorball.” I was looking up song lyrics (I listen to other artists besides arctic monkeys, I swear 😅)

Time: 11:47 PM when I’m writing this. But I usually queue most of my posts so it’ll be 10 AM when I’m posting this :3

Dream Trip: Hmmm, idk. I’m not much of an explorer lol. Maybe Japan or New Zealand? Just to say that I’ve been there before. Honestly, as long as I can go either shopping or to an amusement park I’ll be happy as a clam.

Last Thing You Read: It’s rare, but sometimes I want to read a cute high school AU with a love triangle. So the last thing I read was a tyrus fanfic called Of Course by CaithyCat & imnotanauthor. I’ve been rewatching Andi Mack, an old comfort show of mine. I know it’s a disney show “for kids” but sometimes I just feel like watching disney or nickelodeon shows ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Also this one in particular I started watching when I was bedridden for a month so it’s very dear to me :)

Last Book You Enjoyed Reading: Believe it or not, I actually read a paperback book last week. I was looking for a quote, so I opened my volume 2 of *cough* Scum Villain’s Self Saving System *cough*. And then I found the quote. And then I just kept reading until I was halfway through volume 3 and it was like 3 in the morning. Seriously, that book makes my brain go a little bonkers. The scene where Shen Qingqiu tries to hide Luo Binghe from Zhuzhi Lang nearly made me cry from laughing too hard.

Last Book You Hated Reading: Excluding fanfics, I can’t think of one… Maybe Tokyo Ghoul/:re back in 2017? I remember really hating that manga. Honestly, I’m really picky when choosing something to read so the stories I end up disliking I tend to just drop them and then completely forget they ever existed.

Favorite Thing to Cook/Bake: I’m kind of a terrible chef ngl. But the reviews are in and I make a pretty stellar spaghetti. Whenever my niece visits, she always asks me if I can make her my spaghetti because it’s way better than any she’s ever had. Getting that kid to eat anything is a struggle, so I’m really glad that she not only eats my food, she asks for seconds.

Favorite Craft to Do in Your Free Time: When I think of the word “crafts”, I imagine, like, art projects made by hand, so I’m not sure I can include writing and gif-making on this one. So excluding those, does drawing count? Even before I got a drawing tablet, I used to doodle all the time even on scraps of paper. I’m not really good at it, but it’s always been something I do just to kinda get my brain to chill.

Most Niche Dislike: Hmm. You know, it’s funny that you mentioned nail polish, izzy, because the first thing that popped into my head was long nails. I have tried to be that girl who gets a full set at the nail salon and I never did it again because the sound of my nails clacking against things bugged me. Like, I can’t even stand the feel of my own natural nails when they’re the slightest bit too long lol.

Opinion on Circuses: Never been to one. But, clowns slightly freak me out so I don’t have the best opinion of their home turfs.

Do You Have Any Sense of Direction: I’d say I do. Or maybe I think I do by association? My parents both have a pretty bad sense of direction and I used to help them a lot by printing out maps and searching for streets in relation to where we were. One of my older brothers used to always assign me as designated navigator because I’m good at keeping an eye on where we are and how to get back on track should we get lost

I liked this tag game! It was fun and refreshing. Gonna tag a couple of you, but please no pressure to respond! Only if you feel like making one 😊 @bioerin @kimievii @koujaaku @ashinlae @wallynorthbynorthwest @fluffyrabbitofdoom @apocalyptickoala @theraincanttouchus @mdzs-rabbithole + anyone who sees this and wants to make one 💖

Sorry if you dont like me ranting in your inbox like this but your recent post really resonated with me

My old school was literally named after having a community, and it was all about community and loving each other and whatever. But it had such an...outcast- I suppose- problem that the staff literally barely did anything about. The students outcasted the "weird" ones (like me) and we always were made fun of. The school was very obviously against blatant bigotry, but they were really bad with anything discreet, even when they were told directly about it by kids like me. You know it's bad when the students literally felt safe enough to say the n slur (a white kid said it, against a poc) multiple times. Yet it always seemed they cared more about kids writing in the stalls in the bathrooms than the community they always preached about. (Literally they made a whole "write your name and time you went to and came back from the bathroom" thing because of that yet did a horrible job at "fixing" the bullying/outcast problem) Hell! My mom said how she got a little annoyed too that she was never invited to or told about the facebook group that the parents apparently had despite the school being all about community. One year, the year I left, the year that was too much for me, last school year, several new kids joined the school. Apparently they were a lot more blatantly bigoted and bulliers, and rubbed off on a lot of the other students there. So suddenly they had a big bullying problem ("oh no the outcast problem we've been told about so much is now too obvious to keep avoiding") Yet they still did barely anything about it. They acted like they were trying but they really weren't doing a good job. So much of the pressure was put on the teachers (god bless those teachers btw, especially the ELA teacher, they were literally the sweetest teachers I've ever known I hope they never have to deal with something like that again), who couldn't do much because they didn't have enough power. Also the teachers were struggling to teach (and they made lessons fun!!!!) bc of the students :( I was being very blatantly verbally bullied near the end of my time there, and I remember my bully shouting out her mean comments very loudly in class (while the teacher was trying to be silly with me). And I could see the teacher know he couldn't do anything except say "just ignore it." I could tell he wanted to do more to help but... he literally couldn't. Because guess who was ignoring it? The fucking staff. The motherfuckers who talked about community soooo much Oh yeah also very very blatantly ableism last year against another classmate of mine (or well, wouldn't come across as ableism to people who wouldn't know why but definitely obvious bullying), and the staff handled it so horribly (I could rant about another thing here but you probably dont wanna hear it and this has already gone on too long lol)

Very very sorry if this was tmi/oversharing or something it's just that what you said in that post sounded like it would've come directly from my mouth so I felt like sharing /gen

(I'd get if you didn't wanna post this btw 😅)

yes, this is exactly what i mean when i say that while individuals might care, schools as a whole generally don't. I'm so sorry your school experience was so bad, that sort of thing shapes so many aspects of your life going forward and in my opinion, it's extremely important for children and teens to have positive experiences at school.

my inbox is available for people to rant in, it's okay <3

Hi))) Found your blog recently (2 days ago I believe, lol), and I am sorta kinda in love with how you draw jjba characters 👉👈

The mix of antro and human features is so unique, there is so much character in it I LOVE ITtttt

And your opinions on sbr are (and I promised to myself to never use this word, but I just can’t find any better one that fits my opinion here) fr based. When it comes to HP and Diego teaming up it feels like the smallest parfait in the world. By the time you get pumped up end exited its over already.

I’ve read sbr two times and on my second reading I kinda ignored chapters that feature Lucy, quickly reading through them and even skipping a couple (I guess it’s kinda obvious which ones). It’s kinda sad how little I ended up caring about her bc she barely interacted with other characters. I kinda wish she was more like Yasuho (although what happens to her at times is kinda awful too, but she’s at least an adult and characters that wrong her are a-holes so that’s an improvement). When it comes to writing female characters it feels like Araki peaked in Stone Ocean and it was sorta downhill from that.

And it might be just me, but the whole sbr ending felt so meanspirited and cruel and what happened to Johnny in p8 made it even worse. I know that it’s supposed to be sad, but not like that.

And um…sorry for the wall of text 😅 It’s not every day I find someone with similar opinions on things and I tend to overshare a little. And sorry if u see this at, like, 3am or something, I really don’t understand how time zones work bc I’m stoopid.

wahh YEAH

Jojos did Stone ocean and RAN and was fueled by girl power to then trip over on itself and throw up and roll around and scream and cry for Steel Ball Run to be some of the most mysoginistic shit Id ever seen from araki. and even in SBR Hot Pants was so cool with sUCH a strong set up only to falter out in the last bit of chapters, like Araki just stopped caring.

i havent started p8 but ough, i hope and pray it does me better than p7 fr...

hiiiii!! I saw your request is open so here I am shooting my shot hehe. I'd love to get a matchup with any male characters, so feel free to go wild with the result ♡

I go by "Angel", she/her, omnisexual, 5'2. I'm not really good at describing how I look, so here 2 pics of me (I don't have any picrew of me, so I hope you are fine with me sending you my real pics 😔👉🏻👈🏻) also, a tmi for today : I'm basically blind on my right eye but I refused to wear glasses on daily basis bcs I think I look better without it 😅

moving on to my personality, I'm an ENFP and a proud gryffindor! 🦁❤ I LOVE to talk, I can't handle silence really well bcs it makes me feel awkward. people's first impression of me are usually "she's a b" or "she is annoying" but most of em ended up loving me after they got to know me personally (RUDEEE 😭) ; anyway I actually have a lot of insecurity about myself and easily got depressed over em, but I love to act all confident in front of my friendsㅡ gotta fake it until you make it I guess 😩

for interests, I love doing tarots, playing text-based games, and listening to disney / musical songs. I also enjoy watching thriller/horror movies, sometimes I got scared to the bones tho 💀

another thing about me is I have a chronic insomnia, my earliest bedtime is 8 am (I know its very unhealthy 😭😭😭) sometimes I can go a day or two without sleep, it's crazy how I'm still alive tbh 🥲

OMG I OVERSHARED DIDN'T I? I'm really sorryyyy, this also one of my bad traits. I tend to overshare my life with anyone and anytime. I hope you don't mind :(

well I guess this is it??? thank you for opening up your matchup request. can't wait to read the result aaaa. have a good daaay 🌸

First of all I want to say don’t worry about oversharing at all, the more you tell me about yourself the better I can make your match-up so all the information you included was super helpful for me actually! Thank you for sending in a match-up request, and I hope you enjoy your match-up below :>

I’d Match You With: 

Denki Kaminari!

Reasoning:

I did a lot of thinking with this one, there were a couple of characters I was considering but in the end I felt like Denki fit the best with you. He loves your bold personality and you share a lot of interests, and overall he’s just really infatuated with you and would be the perfect boyfriend to go alongside you :D

Headcanons About Your Relationship:

- Denki is not a big fan of silence either, it makes him feel awkward so between the two of you you’re pretty much always talking about something, there’s never a moment of silence in your relationship :) He even has a list of dumb quotes you’ve both said to each other in his phone because of how much you both talk whenever you're together lol

- If anyone’s ever rude to you or accuses you of being “annoying” or “bitchy” without getting to know, you Denki will 100% stand up for you! He isn’t letting anybody treat you that way and he will immediately get on them about how you’re an amazing, lovely person, and they’re the ones being rude by judging you without even knowing you personally :)

- Denki knows how it feels to put on a confident face and try to “fake it ‘till you make it”, he has a pretty similar mindset himself actually. So he understands how you feel, and he makes sure you know that when you do need to let down those confident walls and show/talk about your insecurities, he’s more than happy to talk with you, to comfort and reassure you (And he hopes you’d do the same for him in return) <3

- Denki is, like, the #1 fan of Disney songs lol, he loves them just as much as you do and the other students around your dorms kinda hate it lol because they always hear you two blasting Disney music and singing along at like 3am

- Denki’s pretty scared of horror movies honestly, but he can have fun watching them if they’re not too scary, so he’ll watch them with you sometimes because he wants to make you happy :) Plus, even though he's pretty scared, he likes being your big strong boyfriend that can protect you if you do end up getting scared, it helps him ignore his own fears lol

- Denki definitely doesn’t stay up as late as you, but he’s no stranger to pulling all-nighters so usually when the two of you have sleepovers together he doesn’t end up falling asleep until at least 5am because he wants to spend as much time with you as he can :)

- Whenever you two pull all-nighters, though, you always follow it up with lots of naps the next day. Even if you have class, Denki can see you starting to get tired and he wants to make sure that you get some sleep now that you’re actually feeling tired, so the second class ends Denki’s dragging you with him to his dorms and piling blankets on top of the two of you as you cuddle and nap together ^^

- Also, you never have to worry about oversharing when it comes to Denki, nothing is oversharing to him when it comes to you. Like I mentioned earlier, he’s happy to listen to you talk about absolutely anything at any time, so never worry about talking too much or telling him too much about something because he wants to know everything he can about you and your life, he just loves you so much <3

Song For Your Relationship:

Shivers by Ed Sheeran :)

So… hi

I just need to jump on here to do a bit of oversharing. Don’t read if TMI is TM for you 😅

Should I put warnings here about sex talk? Like not smut just talking about sex and virginity?

Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Still here. Alright so then I guess I’ll warn you about teenage angst. Or just like actual angst. There’s lots of that here.

xx

Okay here it is.

I’m 29, I just turned 29 last week, and as much as I feel my age, I also feel like I didn’t do a lot of things that teenagers do; I never snuck out. I never drank. I never smoked. I never did drugs. I never went to house parties or bonfires in the middle of nowhere. I never sto- okay I did steal but it was like 5 cent candies from the convenient store and I was like 8. The point is, I never broke the rules. I was a good kid. Probably too good for my own good.

Hence: still being a virgin at 29.

Listen, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with being a virgin. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with not having sex or waiting to have sex. I know that not everyone wants to have sex. I know people think that virginity is a social construct and it doesn’t actually exist. I think that everyone should be allowed to live the life they want to live it and have sex whenever and however they’re ready. But my deal? I was busy in middle school. Band twice a day, sometimes three, nearly failing math, still having to go to classes, trying to have a social life — I was just trying to be a kid because home sometimes felt very intense that I needed to separate the two from each other. However, things from home followed me to school. Particularly, what my mom said about my body. I would hear it from her, feel shitty and then not think about it for a few days until someone at school would mention it and I would spiral.

It didn’t matter if I was sociable and friendly and people generally liked me. Kids are mean and they pick at the vulnerable things when they’re hurt or jealous or just want to fight. So school became just as intense as home and the last thing I was thinking about was sex. But when I got to high school, all the kids I went to middle school with were there. Or the majority of them anyway. So while everyone had been making connections in middle school, I’d been hiding myself away to stop my heart from breaking or to stop feeling like I was in everyone’s way. I took that with me for most of my life. Jobs. University. Dates. Travelling. All of it.

Cut to 2017: I’m 23, living alone for the first time and in Vienna no less. I’ve never been kissed, I don’t think I could confidently say I’d ever been on a date at that point and, as we’ve already established, I had never had sex. Then there was Tom. He was sweet and kinda funny. A little intense but not too much. He kissed me when we were dancing in a club and then walked me back to my apartment. I felt like it could’ve gone further and I could’ve been ready for it but it didn’t. But after the kiss, I wasn’t feeling like I was in everyone’s way anymore. Until the next day.

See my friend had been with his friend while I was with Tom. She didn’t hook up with him, not that I know of anyway, but they were kissing about as much as Tom and I were. He walked her back to the apartment building with Tom and I. It was all fine. And then the next day I found out that my friend was going over to their place to hang out — I wasn’t invited. Now to be fair, Tom did ask me what I was doing that day but he never asked me to do anything or come over. Like I just need guys to be direct without being creepy or gross or sending dick pics. Is that too much to ask? Anyway, I was back to feeling like I needed to make myself small again and let people live their lives around me. I moved past it. And sex just… wasn’t on my mind. See, my non-virgin friends don’t understand this.

“How can you not want to lose it?” “Do you not want to lose it?” “You know you don’t have to be in love right?” “Just choose some guy from the bar!” “Swipe right on as many guys as you can and then ask them if they want to take your virginity. It’s the easiest thing in the world!”

But I was always of the mindset that it’ll happen when it’s supposed to happen. When someone isn’t expecting it to happen or waiting for me to do it. Fate is a funny thing and it all happens the way it’s supposed to in the end.

Queue: 2022. I’d been on a few dates now. All of them sucked. I’d kissed a few guys by this point. Some were okay, most were lacking. I’d been talking to a lot of guys on a few different apps. No flirting, no banter, just when was the last time you had sex — unmatch. Then my brother died and my perspective on things changed. I realized that my life had been so predominantly about making other people comfortable that I had no idea what I wanted or who I was and being 28, about to be 29, soon to be 30, seemed late for me to realize this 😅

So I booked myself a one way ticket to Dublin. With no intention of romance or sex. This wasn’t supposed to be a eat, pray, love situation. The only intention was to get out of that negative space and discover who I am, who I wanted to be. No judgement. No expectations. Just living my life. And then Damien shows up. After nearly a week of not really feeling like guys noticed me, here’s this guy on Tinder who’s funny and sweet and who’s really only alluded to sex but never really made it feel like he expected it. We meet up. We laugh. We flirt. We drink. We flirt some more. By the end of the night, we’re very touchy freely and he’s grabbing a taxi to his hotel.

Normally, at this point I’d be like nope but with him, I just wanted to be near him. I could feel myself staring at him in the taxi as he spoke to the driver. Like I legit couldn’t stop myself from staring at him. Then we got back to the room and it all happened pretty quickly. The kiss was a bit sloppy and getting undressed was a bit awkward. But once he found out I was a virgin, he was sweet and gentle and considerate. And now he won’t message me back 😅

There’s a bunch of details that I’m not mentioning here like neither of us came, I gave him the worst blowjob I’m pretty sure he’ll ever get in his life and when there was… resistance he stopped. Like completely. He said he would try again later or soon but he didn’t. He said he could tell it was gonna hurt a bit and he wanted to take it slow. And then we went to sleep. We cuddled. The cuddling was nice. That’s the intimacy I crave. But the sex was uneventful to say the least. I think it could’ve been great but… 🤷‍♀️

Anyway, the next day I tried messaging him and it was super distanced and not nearly as cute as it was and now I get why everyone says virgins are so clingy. I never thought I’d be that girl but I find myself trying to connect with him before I leave. Even though I know he’s not in Cork any more. And it’s driving me a bit crazy to watch as he doesn’t reply to any message I send lol.

A friend of mine said just to stop trying to talk to him or it might sour what sounded like a generally good night. Not everyone’s first time is as positive as mine so why try to ruin it. Basically is what she said. And I get it but I can’t stop myself. I just want to send a flirty pic and say “if you’re ever in Calgary, hit me up.”

The thing is, I think I have the perfect picture for it, too, but I can tell he’s not into it and I do agree that I don’t want the night to be spoiled…

Also, I needed to attach this song because it was the first song I heard after it happened and it gave me all the feels 😅🥰🥹

It’s interesting to me that in one of the first podcast episodes (with both Mikes) he was talking to Majlak about how he knows to keep his relationships private after seeing Mike be so open to the public when he was with Lana and how the public always felt like they could comment on their every move basically. But then he brings up on his pod kind of often about when he’s “seeing” or hanging out with a girl. He mentioned 🚩 on a couple lives and then had a whole section of Mike’s vlog being over dramatic about it. I get that he’s not in a relationship yet. I guess he likes oversharing a bit.

Or he wants people to know he still got it lol 😅

Okay soooo this is a vent 😅

I’ve been escaping into fiction too much recently. My mental health kinda took a sharp decline recently… I mean, it’d been declining for months, but the past few weeks, it really just plummeted.

I’ve been withdrawing a lot socially, too. And I guess I feel like if I make this post, at least I’m not keeping my pain trapped inside. I know this is quite an overshare, but people of tumblr, please understand.

I’m fortunate to have therapy, but that’s once per week. And recently, I’ve felt like I need more. I feel like I’ve taken so many steps back. I was healing, I was growing. I was improving at communication, I was being mindful of boundaries, I was opening up.

I guess I’m still doing all those things. I think it’s just hard when I start seeing patterns of my 17-year-old-past-self start popping up again…

I’m 20, but I feel like I’m back 3 years ago: depressed, disconnected, and lonely.

I feel the need to close this out with something hopeful, but I don’t have much, so here’s a cool snake earring I recently got: