#fuck all the discourse it's fuckin exhausting
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flutters eyelashes do u know that asking people especially trans women why there is discourse (implying people have told people to kill themselves about it because this is the internet) why roxy is a trans woman might be an exhausting thing to ask?
quick reasoning: the pesterchum initials are references to chromosomes with GT->EB, TT (dirk), and TG (roxy) implying transness (hussie has discussed junes handles in this manner). when the last two letters of roxy’s name was being revealed, they were referenced as chromosomal letters. roxy’s pink theme and her defeating HIC. it was a widely accepted hc pre epilogues, so when roxy comes out as trans masc, people r like?????
whats the issue as long as rox is trans? well the issue is that theres context to that move. jade’s body being seen as a joke is a fuckin HUGE one. callie another trans girl comes out as nonbinary? which is? ?? its explained as callie felt like they were forced to identify as a girl to be the opposite of calliborn. calliope the humanity and troll culture weeb. its hard to feel like this was anything but a “theyre an alien thus they must be nonbinary”.
eventually even with all the explanation, people would say “ok? its not that deep? its not like i’m hurting anyone.” and the answer to that is i fucking guess?? i fuckin GUESS. and then rinse and repeat. do u get why its exhausting now.
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Hey OP, has this blog and all the asks and stuff you get influenced any of your perspectives on shipping discourse and general media stuff?
Oh, for sure.
I don’t think my opinions on “problematic” media or whatever itself have changed at all, but my opinions on these communities definitely have. Of course, I can’t talk about every single proshipper/anti and I’m generalizing here and this is entirely just from my experience. If it doesn’t fit you, it doesn't fit you.
I don’t really know how to articulate this very well so I’m sorry if this makes no fucking sense.
The communities everyone has built feel so backwards. Going into this, I assumed the community built around problematic media would be centered around said problematic media, but instead, it’s centered around defending it while also never engaging with it at all. It feels so bizarre to me that you’ve created a community around “live and let live, just enjoy the fiction you want to, it doesn’t matter at all actually” and yet 99% of all posts I see from proship blogs is about being proship and not them actually just enjoying their little fictional guys. In my experience, there seems to be more “fictional incest is okay because it’s fiction” posts than “here’s a drawing of some fictional incest, which is okay because it’s just fiction” posts, if that makes sense.
I don’t know, it just feels bad, man. Running this blog has made me significantly less happy, and I don’t really know why anyone would subject themselves to such a soul-crushing community long-term when they don’t even care all that much. I don’t know why someone would run a proship (or anti) blog where you only post about being morally better than the other “side” about your fiction, while also… Never posting or reblogging anything about the fiction you like. It just feels like nobody is happy or posting about the things that make them happy, ever.
I have the opposite problem with antis and proshippers. Antis have some fucked up opinions and I think they’re awful, but at least they don’t post about other shit. It’s possible to enjoy the things an anti has made without being an anti because they don’t exclusively post about being an anti. The #anti and #antiship tags are overrun with crossposts because nobody fuckin uses those hashtags. Antis don’t post under ship discourse tags or search through ship discourse tags or follow blogs exclusively about ship discourse like proshippers do.
I obviously can't speak for anyone else, but from my experience running this blog, it is exhausting constantly surrounding yourself with a community entirely built off of outrage. Of course harassment and bullying are bad and of course we should be anti-harassment. But I feel like that should be the baseline for the community and not everything the community thinks and does.
The term “ignorance is bliss” comes to mind. You don’t have to post about “wow antis sure do suck haha” all the time when you could post about your fictional blorbos instead. Post your blorbos dammit, even if they’re siblings or what the fuck ever, it’ll make you happier than posting about discourse.
Enjoy whatever fiction you want, but at least post about things you enjoy. You can quit posting about discourse if it makes you feel worse, I promise it doesn’t make you an anti I swear.
#i don't get it man i just don't get it#you all seem so unhappy but bbg you can just stop please#yes i do see the irony in me posting “you don't have to do this anymore if it makes you unhappy actually”#what of it#not a confession
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Just sayin, if teachers stopped taking the side of the aggressor, schools wouldn't be so hostile. If they stopped enabling aggressors, it wouldn't be so hostile, when kids aren't pushed up against a wall and ya'll didn't help push them further up, schools wouldn't be as aggressive.
It's real easy too, you see, when a kid says another kid is bullying them, you do something? Not put them in the same room to talk, like a fucking absolute baffoon, not tell the victim to get over it, not take the side of the aggressor.
Because that's when all options were exhausted. And you. You enabled this. When students do all they can with their limited resources and you throw them back to the sharks, they Will Defend Themselves while you aided in their assault.
Don't deny it gives you a boner to see kids suffer, I know how you enablers think. Why else take such a shit paying job if not to torture kids? Don't answer that, the alternative is far, far worse.
Schools should be held accountable for shit like this. Forced to make a paper trail, and when they punish the victim, the victim can go to court and show the receipts. No fucking reason to aid in assaulting bullied kids. Absolutely none.
Schools Need To Stop Enabling Violence.
That's all they do. That's how they're set up. That's their purpose. Until they fix themselves, schools are, literally, combat zones. And, literally, schools enabled it worse than any politician, loooong before any modern political discourse.
Better education, higher pay, and no lunch debt is one thing, but the enviroment of school is Active Combat. Teachers put kids up to assault and harrass other kids all the time out of seemingly boredom.
That is a decision they have made loooong before shootings were so frequent. Can't blame them for that, but you can blame them for the enviroment being so open and casual to such.
To ever make it a last resort, to ever Make It To A Last Resort.
Like instead of teaching kids empathy, being there for them in times of crisis, teachers really pushed kids to be even more aggressive. It's sickening we don't put any blame on all aggressors involved because of a fuckin' title. Blame teachers and school for being bully enablers.
Honestly, wouldn't surprise me if Kidz4Kash was still around to "collect troubled youth" the school system forced them into. Mine tried before the scandal was exposed. School is just not remotely safe. Hard to say School as a concept will ever work given the people that work it.
Seriously don't put your kids in public school. It was worth it for communication skills, but life long problems come either way, I'd rather a sheltered moron than a combative experienced child turned adult too soon, or dead, more than likely dead, probably suicide or shooting. Either way, schools enable it.
Just saying, school has more issues than money. It's the people. Blame Schools. If they wanted to be better, they'd have tried. If they wanted teacher pay better, they'd have tried, if they wanted school shootings to stop...
They'd be better people. Not working that job. Because no Chef works Mcdonalds, just teenagers and crackheads. Raising pay will help, but you Have To Fire the Aggressors for it to even matter. Otherwise you reward the systems in place that have caused such aggressions to rise.
Schools need to fix themselves, fire aggressors, stand up for victims, be held accountable when they actively choose to fail, and then, only then, raise pay.
As of now? Pffft. Ya'll fuckers putting kids in jail, therapy, or the grave. Only one of those is socially acceptable. Fuck off.
#schools#I remember the days when criticising schools and explaining that aggression was only going to rise with a system that enables it#oh those days were fantastic#having teachers online come and explain Exactly Why Shit Was Going To Get So Bad but being totally incapable of realizing their actions#will lead to modern problems#you learn alot from morons defending their pro-aggressor attitude#anyways#yeah please don't listen to teachers after whatever big event at a school#listen to the kids that aren't camera perfect for news stations#let them speak#they'll tell you about the time a kid was causing them problems for months and despite asking teachers to help was only punished for it#or how one teacher actively bullied them so much they started calling to be pulled out of their class everyday#or how one teacher honest to god put him and the bully in the same room to discuss feelings#at age 13#and that doubled the problem#and when you went to them they just pushed you off and stopped seeing you as your guidance counsellor everyday#cool times#yeah no seriously though Schools are set up like shit and Pay is hardly the half of it#teachers are aggressors#they will set kids up to fight each other#they will defend their favorite#they will lie to get you in trouble#they will follow you from junior to high school#and you will be taken out for YOUR PROTECTION and put in online school#that#is#public school
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“methinks” this idea fucking sucks ~ high school theatre au
characters: wilbur, schlatt, (next are only briefly shown) tommy, tubbo
trigger warnings: swearing
authors notes: HI THIS IS MY WRITING ALT THIS IS KRABMEAT BUTBUT HERES THE SECOND MINOR FIC PART FOR YOU @enigmaticvariation TO GO WITH THE DRAWING!!
@mcytblraufest THANKYOU FOR THIS WONDERFUL EVENT ILYSM THIS WAS SUCH A FUCKING BLASY AHHHHH TYSMMM
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You wouldn’t be able to tell that Schlatt is in his sophomore year while Wilbur is in his junior year. Their personalities vastly different; Wilbur acting with the carefreeness of a younger student, contrary to Schlatt who seemed to carry a casual look of exhaustion and fatigue like the majority of the finals, SAT and ACT-stressed juniors. Wilbur being a flamboyant member of the theatre club, while Schlatt spends most of his time in the school's computer science room, occasionally doing backstage work for the theatre club's plays and musicals as a means to get extra credit.
That’s how the two know each other- not really through extravagant meetings, or trials and tribulations of growing their friendship to be the best of buddies, hell, they wouldn’t even consider each other friends! Or, Schlatt at least wouldn’t. Wilbur goes out of his way to make futile attempts to get Schlatt in the practice runs of the upcoming plays. Usually rejected requests. Usually.
“Wilbur, listen to yourself, buddy,” Schlatt quipped, “out of all the times I’ve rejected you- all the times I’ve rejected you with every SINGLE character you’ve asked me to act out for you- and you think that fucking JULIET is someone I’d even CONSIDER doing? Really, Wilbur? Really?”
Schlatt looks at Wilbur, deadpanning as he rubs the side of his face in frustration. Wilbur, however, has a mischievous grin on his face.
“Oh, come on Schlatt! Just ONE scene, please? Our Juliet is busy volunteering as a teacher's aid right now and we NEED to get this act down by next week! Please, man- just this once?” Wilbur pleaded, falling on the deaf ears of Schlatt, that of which was busy listening to the discrepancy of his reasoning.
“If you guys need to get the script down by next week then why do I have to help with the lines?! Shouldn’t you wait for your Juliet then if that’s the case?”
The bickering and debate went on for a good few minutes until Schlatt eventually caved after being offered a crisp 20 dollar bill from Wilbur. Out of the times the two have talked, Wilbur just so happened to pick up on Schlatts love for money as well as his lack of it. (He happened to apply at the same butcher shop Schlatt works at and saw the $5 an hour he was making. He didn’t get the job, by the way.)
“Farewell! I will omit no opportunity that may convey my greetings, love, to thee.” Wilbur holds his hand out musingly before dramatically clutching his heart, nodding his head solemnly to Schlatt. Schlatt grumbles at Wilbur, mumbling “right, and you just had to be fuckin Romeo, too…” before grabbing the script with a sloppy hand. His eyes look down at the small print, squinting while reading aloud.
“O think'st thou we shall ever meet again?” Schlatt's voice is monotone, voice inflections set to a minimum. He struggles with the pronunciation of “think’st”, redoing it a few times before finishing the sentence.
“I doubt it not; and all these woes shall serve for sweet discourses in our time to come.” His eyes flutter as he delivers his line, a sweet smile as he awaits for Schlatt to respond in- hopefully- an equally matched delivery this time.
“O God, I have an ill-divining soul! Methinks I see- oh come ON Wilbur! ‘Methinks’?! That is the stupidest shit I’ve ever heard, I'm not doing this!” Schlatt scolded, throwing his hands up in the air and squeezing the script in his hand. Wilbur sighs, slightly tired of having to convince him again, but nonetheless he persists.
“No, you have to! If not, I suppose I’ll just take back my 20 then? If you aren’t going to fulfill your part of the deal, of course!” In response, Schlatt can only groan in annoyance while muttering incomprehensible words under his breath. He smooths out his script and begrudgingly continues on with the act. Wilbur grins contently as he gets back into character.
Unbeknownst to the pair onstage, there seems to be two figures peering in from the outside of the theatre room. The taller blonde peeks his head in above the shorter brunette. They both squint.
“Oi, Tommy, isn’t that your brother Wilbur? What’s he doing with that guy? I’ve seen him in the computer science room before but I never caught his name,” Tubbo questions,
“Hey, your answers as good as mine, pal. He’s talked about him at home sometimes, that’s Schlatt. Don’t know why he’s made him be Juliet, though. Seems like he’d make a decent Capulet.”
#tw caps#krabs kreates#mcyt fanfic#mcyt fanfiction#mcyt au#not an x reader#wilbur fanfiction#wilbur soot fanfiction#wilbur soot fic#jschlatt fanfiction#schlatt fanfiction
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I'm going to go back to slowly working on my TTRPG projects after this, but I've been profoundly discouraged about it lately, to the point that I haven't had the energy or enthusiasm to consider making plans for my local con, which is coming in October. They've got a POC industry meet-and-greet that I told myself that I'd attend the next time I went, but I can't muster excitement for myself, or the community.
From two people of the first people outside of friends who really checked for my work and offered encouragement: One of them turned out to be a fuckin' sex pest, the other disappeared after a while. First game I released for purchase didn't catch, outside of very kind friends, and folks who said they thought it sounded great but never gave it a look.
My pet project, the Cortex superhero game I've been working on for years, hasn't exactly stalled out, but the energy I put into hadn't really come back to me. Hell, I had consultation chats with the system's developer, and even with the battery in my back from that, I couldn't get lift off.
I watched the TTRPG content channel I loved and volunteered with (and let people see my face on a fucking Twitch stream for--three times!) slowly fade away because of money, stress, and audiences that couldn't...well, I won't be a dick about the specifics there, you can't hate on people for what they enjoy. I will note, anecdotally that it's a shame that the channel was out in these streets before Critical Role, and all throughout its run, I'd hear people talk about what games they'd like to see streamed that weren't D&D, or different types of content, etc....and I'd point toward my folks who busted their ass to do that for years. Then I'd get a response of crickets.
Engaging with a lot of the indie TTRPG developer community is equal parts intimidating and irritating. I'm already allergic to DISCOURSE most times, but it seems to be a pretty cyclical thing within the community. I never pull the "who we mad at today" glib bullshit that tries to deflect from genuine critique...but a lot of that corner of the Internet is second only to Leftist Internet in its inability to simply starve bad actors of oxygen by ignoring them.
I'm just...exhausted. And between major stress with my actual job (probably doesn't help that the dates the con fall right before when I'm planning on being unemployed for at least a month), and some pretty embarrassing bouts of loneliness, I don't got it in me to pretend like I'm enthusiastic about the shit.
I'll eventually force myself to remember what it was like to run a playtest of something I made, and watch people build something new out of tools I gave them. And I'll get back to work. But right now? Not so much.
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draft: what are we to animals
earlier today a roommate woke me up to deal with a baby mouse that had wandered into his basement room. he was super fuckin neurotic about it, trying to logically exhaustively check every area the mouse could have gone. i crawled under the bed and tried to hold and calm it, but he subsequently shoved both of us with a broom and scared it away.
i tried to describe to my roommate how to think like a mouse. mammals all share this basic framework of psychology, we can all understand each other if we try. for a young mouse you have to understand a few basic alterations of the terror of being alive:
- prey animals cannot see the world as a picture like predator animals can, their retinas are adapted to perceive motion, they see in the first derivative
- a young mammal has no ability to perceive the their environment in detail, like a toddler they see sounds and visual stimuli with no clear rules to bind them together, they need more experience to learn rules of this kind
- rodents cannot perform second-order reasoning, and a mouse fundamentally cannot decide to make new hiding spaces to taunt you
- prey animals have very high baseline anxiety and seek any source of calm slow motion they can find
this of course did no good. you can't teach men anything. but it made me think a lot more about how these intuitive skills hint at our ability to imagine other intelligences. we can deeply empathize with a lot more than just other humans, and anyone who claims we cannot is just an asshole. we can understand the internal psychological experience of other mammals we would usually consider lesser, like dogs, and we can also understand the experiences of mammals we would (or should) consider greater, like sperm whales. we are not unique in this respect. the canines and cetaceans can understand us too. not just that, they can develop cross-species languages and rituals to communicate with us.
in the braindead american eugenics inspired discourse on intelligence we tend to think it is impossible to have both an idea of being "more intelligent" and "mutually intelligable" as ways to talk about the interaction between two different patterns of cognition. according to traditional wisdom, a species that is more intelligent should possess concepts that a lesser species cannot comprehend. this does not seem to be how it works in practice, mammals share a fundamental set of concepts and reactions that can be used to communicate across species lines. there are things that we do not share with small rodents but when we start to define the boundaries of any specific aspect of human cognition we are forced to recognized we are not unique.
i have a chihuahua. people make fun of me for being the blond bitch with the tiny la dog. until they spend time with the dog. i trained her like a hunting dog and she devotes all of her 9cm^3 brain to developing social protocols and collaborating with the people around her. she's currently mad at me for leaving her alone too often and she has started staging protests where she grabs someone's attention and then pretends to die. she wandered out onto the street without a leash a few months back, and then returned after conning another family to pay for her rabies vaccine booster and becoming a short-lived instagram meme. she's also a fucking idiot. she can't figure out how to walk on wood floors and she has absolutely no idea how to interact with other dogs.
i shaped the dog's intelligence in an unusual direction for an animal of her size and position in inter-species society, but it turns out that 9cm^3 brain is perfectly capable of understanding human emotional reactions instead of other dog's responses. she has an extremely limited capacity to reason about theory of mind but it doesn't matter. we actually aren't very complicated and our emotional responses immediately follow from our environment. even our long-term plans and emotional priorities can be extropolated from our facial expressions in most cases. are you going to divorce your husband? my dog can tell you.
there are vectors of intelligences, different directions in which we can use our capactities to specialize. for a "lesser" species like canines we know they have different vectors of intelligence too. we know they are not foreign and can empathize us even though we are "greater". what makes us greater then? we can do a lot of philosophical faffing about but it's just the cubic area of the mammal brain dedicated to environmental perception and intuitive reasoning. the canine anterior cingulate cortex is fucking tiny and the hippocampus barely even exists. as primates we have an enhanced ability to be caught in our own heads because we have thousands of extra layers of processing abstract information when it has no direct relationship to the world. we also specialize ourselves into our own vectors of intelligence but the dimensionality of human specialization is so high it is more convenient to deny its existence and think about iq scores.
looming in the future is a wake-up call. 50 years the most transformative moment in society will not be the development of artificial intelligence, or the discovery of extraterrestrials, or even the moment that humanity establishes itself as multiplanetary. it will be the decoding of whalesong. we now know with strong confidence that the only difference between our primate brains and other mammal brains is the volume of different cortical structures. we also know there are other species with much larger brains that possess language and complex grammer that we struggle to understand. there are existing species on earth that are "greater" than us and even evaded us killing them by hiding in places we didn't have the ability to explore. they are smarter than us.
but we can still empathize with them. sperm whales have lived for milleniea in a world we only just invented. everything they travels across half the world and is heard by every member of their species. they propogate patterns of their grammar on a totally global scale, regardless of their location they understand how to phrase a statement so that it follows the patterns of the wider community. they cannot open their mouths without engaging with their own sphere of memes even for short-form statements. they live *inside* of twitter.
there is currently a project to decode whalesong into a human-comprehensible grammar but it may be necessary to rely on artificial intelligence to assist us in the translation. we can empathize with the whales, but we cannot currently speak to them and it is very possible that their grammars are just more complex than ours, similar to how my writing is more complex than my dog's performance art. i will not comment on what the consequences of talking to a higher species will be, because i cannot even hope to comprehend.
it is worth noting that everything here is just about mammals. our own branch of life and close ancestors. who the fuck knows what birds are thinking
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honestly not to get into this but I think we've got to find a better way as a like online community of squaring the following facts
teenagers should not be held to the same standards as adults and need to have space to screw up and learn from their mistakes
children, teenagers and young people are particularly vulnerable to bullying, manipulation and grooming
people, particularly children and young people, should have access to age-appropriate spaces where they're not constantly presented with sexual imagery and expectations
there is a substantial power differential not just between adults and children, but between older and younger teens
we live in a culture which overwhelmingly pressures teenagers to act as adult as possible, and we should aim not to feed into that pressure
significant age gaps in relationships are often dodgy, manipulative and leave lasting damage regardless of intent, especially when you're college age or younger and regardless of whether or not it is, technically, legal.
with the related facts that
teenagers are still responsible for their actions
there is no hard and fast cutoff point for this learning curve and vulnerable stage, and people in their late teens and early 20s are often similarly vulnerable even after passing the age of legal majority (and in my experience often abruptly much more targeted by creeps once they pass the age of consent)
Teenagers and young adults are going to be friends with each other and that's normal
Teenagers are going to have sex with each other, talk sexually to each other and fantasise about sex. that's a normal part of development and if it's not pressured there's nothing at all wrong with having sex with someone a similar age. yes even if one of you's 15 and one's 16. IF you feel safe doing it and IF it's genuinely what you want to do (and being a teenager is messy and confusing so you may not know but. be careful with yourself there will always be a later)
teenagers are capable of intelligently engaging with topics, and capable of learning
teenagers need to, to some degree, retain a degree of responsibility for their own internet experience (not in the sense that it's their fault if they get targeted, but in the sense that personal blogs, 18+ content and other content not targeted towards
like there must be a better way to square this than Everyone My Age Or Younger Who I Agree With Is A Literal Minor How Dare You, Also Here's A Callout Post I Wrote About A 19 Year Old For Shipping Two Teenage Characters Together When They Are A Literal Adult.
like dividing the world into Literal Adults and Literal Minors isn't.........working great, is it? people who are very clearly to my eyes still Youths (you know, like 19 or 20) are looking down at 17 year olds from their Lofty High Horse of Adulthood instead of engaging with them as people, and simultaneously people that age exist as Schroedinger's Minor - if we like them then they can't be expected to do better and if we don't like them they're, idk, pedos for having 17 year old friends even though like. my dude I have been in university classes that contain both 17yo and 21yo people, is it unreasonable for them to interact as equals???
age discourse on this site is fucked my guys and I'm speaking as someone who was Very Much Pushed To Grow Up Too Soon and consistently targeted by adults demanding sex and emotional support from 14 on. like I'm not here to diminish the importance of building safe environments for teenagers, I just think that necessarily means treating teenagers and young people as whole individuals with specific needs, not seeing an arbitrary cutoff below which you are not to be interacted with or criticised. that isn't how you create a healthy relationship between adults and young people, it's how you create a highly exploitable and exploited system of alienation, and it leaves a lot of people who should be getting support and protection out in the cold.
#discourse i guess#idk it's just exhausting how little the way people talk about age and interaction actually bears a relationship to the real world#AND AGAIN that doesn't mean it should be a wild west free for all#i will carry the scars of people's inability to protect me when i was a teen for my whole life#but this SELF-EVIDENTLY isn't protecting the people it's trying to protect#and also tbh. every one of us will fuck up repeatedly and catastrophically in our teens#but at the same time. we learn by being held accountable#but in the current atmosphere I'm not sure how well people draw the line between accountability and harassment#and let's be fuckin clear. harassment is bad whether the subject is an adult or a child#but especially with that power differential. not good.
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Something I've noticed in fandom that I don't particularly like is how... serious, everyone takes everything. I don't mean this acc in particular, but just. Why do I need to send a professional grammarly-edited thesis for why I like/dislike something. Why do I need to speak to everyone like they are my boss, and why do they speak to me like I am their child. Why. And another thing: why do people automatically assume malice? Over discord servers, unless it is a politics specific discord, I try not to talk about politics. Yet somehow everyone and their grandmother feels they have the right to assume where I stand just because I don't make it clear every damn sentence with performative lip service. Fandom has always been political, but God fucking damn, give me a break. And this whole business with minors; I don't give a fuck. Sincerely. I wasn't the pure Christian child and I don't expect anyone else to be, but again and again I've gotta sit here and listen to some random stranger on the internet tell me that because I only have 18+ in my bio that is not enough to prove I'm an adult and therefore unworthy to follow them. How about this for proof: fuck right off, you have no privilege to know my age, my gender, or anything about me. I put 18+ in my bio as a courtesy, not because you fuckin demanded it. And then God forbid you violate one of the three thousand rules in a fandom discord. I can understand if it's graphic images or hate speech, but getting told not to make """nsfw comments""" over a ligma joke??? Like is this fucking first grade??? There's so much damn discourse over nsfw and actual fucking issues that people have somehow conflated the two into one issue that should be taken dead seriously. Little confession? I hate fandom discord. I do. You enter a fandom discord, they either have a bazillion useless channels, pay lip service to political issues while in the same breath taking a fuckin fandom week as seriously as a protest, are pearl clutchers of the highest degree, or all at the same time. AND ANOTHER THING. How did a space so fucking queer become so damn christain??? When did it become the norm to act like a passive aggressive stereotype of a southern evangelical when someone is ""sinful"".
I'm tired.
Sorry for the rant.
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Heh. Yeah. Honestly, I think people sometimes forget they can just... moderate things themselves. Yeah, yeah, it’s work, but you set the tone for your own space.
I thought a lot about what to say for my latest discord. I ended up with a “server philosophy” channel instead of a “rules” one for now. It has one post so far, which reads:
This server is for fans of Abe no Seimei (Qing Ming) and Minamoto no Hiromasa (Bo Ya), media they appear in, and the topic of onmyouji or "yin yang masters" in history and media.
We're a space for adults to discuss in a chill environment. All kinks are welcome. Bigotry, including anti-fujoshi hate, is not.
The entire server is a potentially nsfw and choose-not-to-warn environment.
I hate going into a discord and seeing a massive wall-o-text full of nitpicky regulations, and then the mods always end up ruling based on their gut feelings about things anyway. I figure something short that hits the target tone clearly might help more than an exhaustive list of thou shalt nots.
But it also helps to keep your fandom spaces down to a dozen or two active people, not the entire damn internet at once.
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i’m fuckin exhausted over this person, but there’s this popular blog that keeps trying to ‘cancel’ me.
First i was blocked by numerous people and put on a blacklist for non confrontationally talking about my opinion on the bi/pan discourse. they told their following to watch out for me, vague posting about how ‘un-punk’ i am or whatever. then after starting shit and vague posting they decided not to interact/ rb my version cause honestly it would have made them look bad.
now, after unfollowing me months ago they some how dug up and old post, where i was still fucking going by my dead name, i state in the tags that i was highly medicated at the time, where i state that the FICTIONAL characters rosa diaz and jake peralta are ‘bicons’.
they are now trying to cancel me for (and i quote) being an exclusionist, panphobic, a poser and a bootlicker (lol, me) and again how un-punk i am and now their followers are interacting.
I am now 22, i know how to critically consume media. am i gonna watch brookyln 99 cause it’s a fast paced comedy show? yeah probably, am i gonna notice how much they push the ‘not all cops/we’re the good ones’ narrative? also yes, it’s not that hard to be self aware.
Also, i have been acab for a VERY long time, like what do u want photographic proof from rallies, graffiti, signs, artwork? idk name it ?
now i would not call them ‘bicons’ cause i’m older now, but you also have to understand, queer coded/ actually out bi people that don’t fall into the usual tropes on mainstream tv??? I’d barely ever seen that shit on mainstream media. i spent my last 11 years in fucking italy, in the south, trust me i had ever reason to be ‘radicalised’ early.
#find something better to do w ur time than go through my dead name tag#mother fcuker#i'm to tired for this shit#i'm already half regretting not naming the blog cause i'm mad as fuck#but realistically it would turn into a shit storm#i know they check on my blog. anyways xxo#discourse#fuck this shit
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requested by no one, but @nemesis729 suggested me to write a fourth part of the series and gave me the idea for the scenario so thank you! I hope you all like this, even though it seems more like a one-shot than a headcanon ✨🌻💛
pairings: Thomas Shelby x twin sister!reader, Shelby family x Shelby!reader, Alfie Solomons x Shelby!wife!reader
warnings: some cursing, and some angst. There might be some grammatical errors since English is not my first language
Distancing yourself from Thomas had such a heavy toll on you
You didn't know you would have felt that way, especially when your twin was in the wrong
A few weeks after Samuel's birthday party, Polly reached out to you with a letter saying that Thomas was doing terribly bad
“Your brother is feeling down, y/n, and it doesn't seem like he's going to recover any time soon. Even after discovering that Grace was carrying his child, his joy was soon covered up by guilt. I never thought I would say this, but I need you to talk to him. And I'm sorry for what we all caused to you, you were right about everything. Love, your aunt Polly”
You talked to Alfie about it, asked him for advice so that you wouldn't have made a big mistake
Although he and your brother lowkey hated each other, he advised you to go see him since he was part of your family
And so you took your car, left Alfie and Samuel at your house and drove to the cut, where Polly had told you Tommy would have certainly been
When you arrived there, you immediately started looking for your brother
You found him sitting alone, smoking a cigarette
“Uh, Thomas?”
“What-who- y/n?”
“It's me”
“Did aunt Pol ask you to come?”
“Yes. If it had been me, I would have stayed at my house. Thank her, and Alfie”
“What did she tell you?”
“She said that you weren't doing well. That you feel guilt. Finally, I must say”
“I'm sorry, y/n. I-I lost you, I lost the most precious thing in the world after, well, Grace”
“It's always that bloody woman, Tom. Don't you understand? I don't know anything about the dynamics of your relationship, but I know that she's no good for you. And she never has been”
“I-I know, but, just accept my fuckin' apologies, y/n! I love Grace, you don't know her like I do”
“You're right, Tom. But I know you. And I know that you won't get anything good from this- your love story with Grace”
Your twin didn't say anything. He just kept looking at the horizon, clearly in conflict with his own self.
You observed his movements: his sad eyes, his exhausted expression, and obvious stress couldn't deceive you. He really didn't know what to do
“Tom, if you need to talk to me, then fuckin' talk”
He wasn't surprised by your anger (obviously). He had to say something to you sooner or later, that's why you came to him for, so he turned his head to you and talked
“Listen, what Pol said was right. I made such a big mistake- estranging you from the family, and I've already told you that. I saw the full picture just now, after Samuel's birthday, that you didn't do anything wrong. You just wanted to protect me, you just said the truth”
You sarcastically clapped your hands a few times, and chuckled
“Bravo, Thomas. Bravo. I'm surprised it took you three bloody years to understand that! Ugh- I knew I didn't have to come, you always say the same things over and over and pretend that you know and understand everything! You know what? You don't! I'm tired, I'm so tired by all this- what you did, for that woman. And she's pregnant now! She's just using you, and you love her too much to see that”
Your brother just looked at you, waiting for your discourse to end.
“I don't want to reunite with you, and then get treated the same way ! I'm not your toy, Thomas. I'm not someone you can use, that you can manipulate to your liking. I'm my own person, I do whatever the hell I want, and the only one who understands it is Alfie fuckin' Solomons- my husband, and he never left me alone, for anything in the world. Unlike you, my twin brother, the one I always relied on, who threw me away like I was fuckin' garbage!”
“Are you done?”
“What?”
“I said, are you done? I said I'm sorry, one too many times, and you still have not forgiven me! What else can I do?”
“Nothing, Tom. Nothing. I'll go back to my house now, and don't fucking come to me if you need a shoulder to cry on- because I won't be that person ever again. You're such an egoistic man, Thomas. I hope you sort out your ideas correctly before it's too late”
And with those words, you officially walked out of your twin's life.
You had finally taken your revenge, for what he'd done to you, for being too stubborn to see the truth that you'd always tried to show him
Deep down, you wanted him to regain his senses and sincerely apologize
But you knew that that moment wouldn't have come any sooner
Now, Thomas was the one with with a broken heart. He would have understood the pain you went and were still going through, even if it was in a much smaller measure.
Having set things straight with your brother, you would have finally lived a happy life, like he had for the past three years, and that was everything you wanted
#reader insert#writerdream22#requests open#peaky blinders imagine#peaky blinders gif#peaky blinders#peaky blinders x reader#thomas shelby x reader#headcanons#peaky blinder headcanon#headcanon#peaky blinders x sister!reader#thomas shelby gif#thomas shelby x y/n#thomas shelby imagine#thomas shelby#thomas shelby x sister!reader#alfie solomons#alfie solomons x reader#x reader#sister!reader#shelby family#grace shelby#Part 4#not requested#angsty
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at a point mentally rn where I’m like ‘discourse? no. news? no. literally anything that reminds me i’m living in a broken world with a shit ton of problems that I’m supposed to give a giant fuck about even though there’s literally nothing I can do about any of it?? no fuckin thanks man!!!!!!’. rn I’m taking a break from all other social media besides tumblr & pinterest because they’re the most chill for me but still on my dash I see so much shit about how fucked up everything is and I just wanna go like 🤫🤫🤫🤫🤫🤫🤫🤫🤫. like yes it’s all important and rich people suck ass and everyday politicians want to take away my rights and the rights of other people and we’re all gonna die one day and there are even people dying right now but goddamn man there’s literally nothing I can do about it all and I’m so fucking tired of caring. hate to say it but I really am. it’s exhausting.
#sorry for the vent fest I am 🎵mentally and emotionally drained🎶#might make a separate tumblr and literally only follow shit like Care Bears or something I don’t fucking know#vampy’s adventures#death tw#discourse tw
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You know what’s really sad to me? Last year, when Sean went to LA, I was so hopeful that he’d collab with Mark, and lots of other people hoped for that too. But now the community is so in shambles this year that it’s not even as fun to see him with Mark and Ethan because not as many people are as hyped as they were before. Sucks man. :/
It's sad but it's true. Being a fan of Jack is fucking exhausting in these conditions. Between Gabs racism going completely unchecked, unmentioned and not at all apologized for ( even defending it from some fans ) , to the continued support and affection for Felix, to his own declining additude and the ridiculous fans who slingshot between"everything is discourse if you look hard enough" and "if you so much as say a video wasn't perfect you're violating pma and personally kicking Sean in the FACE"
I'm not so much upset by his presence anymore now I'm just numb. I enjoy what I can when I do bother to look at him and then he just, stops existing when I'm not watching him and that's the fuckin saddest thing to me. He used to be on my mind a lot cause of how important he was to me.
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radicarian said: how dumb are we talkin'
under a cut because the diehards can’t find me there
(note: um this got long, apparently i have a lot of art-criticism-y thoughts about this)
so there’s this subreddit that was created for “respectful” negative critiques of The Last Jedi, right?
and i find this amusing for a bunch of subtle inside-baseball reasons.
to dump my cards on the table:
* i keep Star Wars discourse at forty-foot-pole length, and
* while i really enjoyed The Last Jedi, and thought it did a lot of interesting things,
* it managed to attract a fanbase that seemed to love it for really dumb/cringe-y lefty/SJ reasons—if i see another “TLJ is about punching nazis” take i will scream, and yet
* of course the haters hated it for even dumber, bad-at-watching-movies reasons (“wah i don’t like that Luke was a depressed old dude wah” omfg y’all do you just want Ep4 re-released forever and ever—okay, yes, that’s what Ep7 was, you’ve made your point)
obviously this “respectful critique” subreddit is more palatable than like, idk, nerds screaming at Disney or whatever, but it embodies this fascinating faux-intellectual discourse that i see creep up time and time again on the internet. i’m familiar with this subculture because these are totally the forums i would’ve hung out in when i was twelve, haha :P
scroll through the archives and you’ll find endless weird, obsessive, nitpicky critiques of the new movies. people are salty because some obscure point of Force lore/mythos were rendered inconsistent by the new films, people are salty because Anakin’s sacrifice was “undermined” by the new baddies, and also Rey is a Mary Sue, blah blah...
and it feels like when you’re a kid, and you learn about the list of logical fallacies for the first time, and then spend the next several years pointing out the fallacies in every political debate, as if the problem with election cycles is the words ad hominem and non sequitur. like, yeah, kinda? but you are missing the forest for the trees, buddy.
similarly, so often what people assert is “bad writing” is this annoying memetic thing, where one dude launches their contrarian take on Why [X] Sucks, and maybe they’re even right that the piece feels unsatisfying, but often their critique amounts to a bunch of obnoxious nitpicks and checkboxes rather than a compelling narrative of what, on the whole, isn’t working.
but then a bunch of contrarian nerds latch onto that take, and parrot the same boring nitpicks back at each other forever, and because they’re being “contrarian”, they’re convinced that they’re Smarter Than Those Other People, and they end up forming a whole weird negging version of the fandom based around pseudo-intellectual gamesmanship.
and again: i get it. i wrote my fuckin’ 80-page takedown of every single page of Eragon as a twelve-year-old, i get why people find it fun, i’ve engaged in my share of it over the years, but nowadays it just bores me.
in general, as i’ve gotten older, i increasingly cringe whenever someone describes something as “categorically bad game design” or “bad writing” or whatever—not because i think all writing is equally good; of course it isn’t. but, (1) usually other adjectives are so much better for describing what exactly is happening—writing can be subdued, flat, frenetic, brash, stilted, hollow, uneven, etc, and these all tell you so much more than “dumb” or “stupid” or “illogical” or “bad”. and (2) other descriptions often give a better sense of what was being attempted, so you can actually judge the piece by what it was aiming for—and sometimes, the answer is “this isn’t bad, it just wasn’t meant for you,” a thing that fans often find intolerable but i think is actually kind of neat. (random example: ff13 was not flawed merely because it lacked open-world exploration. it was trying to tell a different story and give a different experience, and you can have an interesting discussion about whether that experience works, but if you spent the whole time being pissed that it’s not ff7 then of course you’ll hate it.) and finally (3) the rare stuff that i just find bad bad bad is usually not worth raging about at any particular length. i don’t learn much or feel good about doing exhaustive takedowns of every Eragon-tier novel on the market; i haven’t even got enough time to read all the good stuff.
(as a sidebar, you’ll notice that very little of my engagement in fandom is via “meta” essays, and this is kind of why—while there’s lots of interesting and wonderful meta that i adore reading, i’m personally uncomfortable writing it, because so often it gets embroiled in these weird fanwarish arguments about “good writing” and i just disengage.
the nice thing about writing fanfic is that it often embeds my feelings about the piece i’m responding to—but in a way that isn’t an argument or a game, it’s a here’s how this worked for me & how it made me feel, and you can write both fanfic that’s furious at canon and fanfic that’s elated with canon while still having something compelling and interesting and new to say, i guess.)
for another perspective on it: one of my favorite takes on TLJ was from a friend of mine, who was pissed because to her, it felt half-assed. it tried to do something bold, but flinched at the last moment: it didn’t go far enough to truly be a subversive weird arthouse film, nor did it nail any of the fun popcorn-cinema things you want from a blockbuster, and thus it failed at both.
that’s a fascinating perspective, one i don’t share but one i’m very glad to hear about. but i assure you that that’s not a take you’ll ever see posted on that subreddit, because it’s just a totally different tenor than the obsessive, nitpicky arguments they’d rather have.
and i find the “forum debate” style of argument staggeringly emotionally tone-deaf at times—like, here’s someone pissed that Rey somehow didn’t try hard enough to redeem Kylo in TLJ and that’s what made it bad, and just, wow. if you couldn’t hear—feel—the heartbreak in Rey’s voice when she says “please don’t go this way,” if it didn’t remind you of a time when someone let you down in the most brutal possible way, if you didn’t feel that moment of “oh, fuck, this isn’t what i thought it’d be”—then idk. uncharitably, i’d say you’re just going out of your way to be annoyed over even the bits that really really worked—but at the very least we’re just not really relating to this piece in an emotionally compatible way at all and our conversation stops there.
anyway, yeah!!! tl;dr sometimes i pass the time by eating popcorn and watching nerds who assert they are Better Than Other Nerds doing “takedowns,” basically
#this is only kind of about star wars#and mostly about why i don't do fandom discussions most of the time#ANYWAY YEAH THAT WAS A LOT TO TYPE#radicarian
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Your thoughts on what wolfishhel posted in regards to Remus x Roman?
I went to take a look at wolfishhel’s blog, and I assume you’re talking about this post.
I just… *long suffering sigh* I have a lot of feelings and opinions, but i’m not going to get into them all. I’ll try to be succinct, since you asked for my thoughts, but this is gonna be a long post. Buckle up, kiddos.
“Shipping Remus and Roman is incest” - that is debatable. This is an opinion, not a stone cold fact. It is a valid headcanon, but it is not the only headcanon. And even if it is considered incest, that alone is not a reason to stop others from shipping it. I’ve argued this point ad nauseum, so I’m gonna move on.
I won’t call them out over this post. I personally feel like it is aggressive and could be worded better, but I’m not going to pick a fight over it.
(Because of their post, wolfishhel has been added to the Anti-Taglist. They have been noted as “unfollow” since they implied they would block all pro-shippers.)
“there’s absolutely no fuckin way you get to complain when people block your blog.”
I don’t know if this is a vaguepost directed at something I said or not. Blocking… is a complicated issue. People have a right to block anyone for any reason, and they don’t have to justify themselves. People have a right to block anyone because they are afraid of being triggered, and I respect that. Minors have a right to block users that post adult content, and I respect that. What I ~DON’T~ respect is that there are SO MANY antis jumping on the bandwagon to “block” ~ANYONE~ who disagrees with their opinion, instead of just blocking the tags themselves. They had no issue with living alongside us when we were silent, but now that we are voicing a different opinion, they are completely cutting us out of their lives instead of taking responsibility for filtering their own online experience and blocking the tags they don’t want to see. (Again, nothing of what i’m saying in this paragraph is aimed at people who are triggered by this topic.) Pro-Rem/Rom is a tiny, tiny, TINY ship, and most antis would probably NEVER see a THING about it if they weren’t causing such a fuss against it.
“You don’t get to disrespect people because they disagree with the ship.”
This, I 100% agree with. Neither side should be disrespecting people over what they choose to ship or not ship. We can agree to disagree, and it is possible to have different opinions and still accept each other within the same fandom.
“And if they don’t want to interact with you bc they feel the content of your blog is potentially triggering or just otherwise disturbing to them, you DO NOT get to call them toxic for that.”
I also 100% agree with that. No one should be called toxic for not wanting to interact. Anyone who wants to be left out of it should be left alone. The “toxic” fans are the ones who are posting and reblogging messages with hurtful or hostile wording, deliberately antagonizing the pro-shippers, and/or telling other fans what they “are and are not allowed” to ship. (That said, this is NOT my approval for anyone to send anybody asks or PMs calling them toxic to their face. I do not condone sending hatemail on either side.)
My only objection to this whole blocking/unfollow discourse is the blogs that are getting blocked on the basis of a single ship when they are interested in content outside of that ship aswell. Most pro-shippers (not counting my own blog which is obvs disproportionally full of RemRom, as well as specific side-blogs that have been made as RemRom-only) have blogs that will contain very LITTLE to NO RemRom content. IT IS NOT FAIR TO JUDGE AND BLOCK AN ENTIRE BLOG BASED ON A TINY, TINY FRACTION OF ITS CONTENT, WHEN IT IS SO EASY TO JUST BLOCK THOSE TAGS. (Again, not counting me, I know that my blog is an exception to this rule). This is a very real fear, and a lot of people have told me they are staying silent because they don’t want to lose friendships or get blocked themselves. Even some Neutrals who don’t like the pairing at all are getting hatemail and blocked because they are daring to “support” us by preaching a message of live-and-let-live.
“It’s incest, there are people who DO NOT want to see that shit and you don’t get to say they’re ‘haters’ or whatever for disliking your ship.”
To be clear. Not All People who dislike the ship are “haters”. But there are a LOT of people who are voicing their opinion using harsh, hostile, and/or aggressive wording, and/or spreading hate posts and hatemail in the fandom.
*sigh*
On the matter of the-no-name-system’s banner: Just… why? Why are these people being so hostile? Why does “looking at a post” justify being “stomped to death”? Why do you feel so threatened by us? If you don’t want us to look, then maybe, just maybe, stop fucking taking about us and bringing up the topic in the first place? Or get the hell off of a public forum where anyone can read your words?
*sigh*
That post alone has 194 notes on it, which is more than a single one of any of my own posts. And this is only a single hatepost in a sea of dozens of hateposts with thousands of reblogs.
I’m just… so tired and astounded by all the undeserved hatred. In a perfect world, I wish it didn’t exist, but in the meantime I’m glad I’m here to fight against it. Don’t get me wrong, I walked into this fight with my eyes open and my feet firmly planted, and I don’t regret it. But it is exhausting.
So there you go, Anon. Those are my thoughts on what wolfishhel posted, since you asked.
Next question?
#dd asks#wolfishhel#ask and ye shall receive#dd is tired#so much hatemail so little time#haters gonna hate#same shit different day#why can't we all just get along#spread love not hate#no gif#serious talk time#i really talk a lot for someone who hates the sound of their own voice#wall o'text#sorry for the tldr#dd loses their cool
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Bruh it is a trip trying to remember half of the fuckin naruto cast cause origionally i followed for those sweet naruto edits and art work but now i’m being educated about the discourse in the naruto fandom while still trying to remember whos who and its just great dude cause it’s helping me dip on character who are just trash and who are like, under appreciated
lol thanks, im glad i prevented another jiraiya and/or orochimaru stan from happening. as for like..the discourse thing i don’t really wanna be here to “educate” but a) ppl can’t stop being fucking stupid and b) some things straight up shouldn’t be discourse at all, like making the hyperactive/more childish character darker than their calmer peers is racist, characters that frequently make sexual comments towards minors shouldn’t be popular, anytime you have to say its not incest technically thats not great, etc. its fucking exhausting arguing with 20-something yr olds that make tumblr their entire personality over things that any person with a working moral compass should know.
#SORRY FOR THE 2014 TUMBLRESQUE GIF LOL#but like...one of the first things that happened on this blog was i got into a fight with a naruhina fan about how you shouldnt treat kishi#like the god of writing or whatever#asks#anonymous#its so simple. racism? bad! pedophilia? bad! and so on and so forth but some of yall wanna be like bbu-tb-t-bt-ut what abouttg....
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I know the issue with James-team-rocket, but why the others?
musajirou/buchichiu have frequently come out in support of art reposting, of jez (james-team-rocket) and at one point sent me and all my friends nonstop vitriol just cause we like... talked about how art reposting is bad, frequently citing that ‘well we’re artists and we’re okay with it!’
they then made a TON of sockpuppet troll accounts as part of a poorly done psy-op. these accounts had several personalities, reocurring:
jessie stans who foamed at the mouth and reblogged tons of team rocket posts to talk about how james sucked and jessie should dump him and how rocketshipping was terrible because jessie was a queen (this was to make fans who favoured her look angry/crazy/etc, and was a reactionary response to people calling out misogyny in rocketfandom and how poorly people treated her)
obsessive queershippers who would reblog rocketshipping posts and derail in the comments about how Only Gay Rockets Were Valid (this was to make ACTUAL queershippers look like teh crazies!!11!! lol those silly faggots!!1!!)
obsessive r*cketshippers (homophobes) who would comment/reblog queershippers posts talking about how they were a sin against god and they would burn in hell (this was when they got desperate)
i can provide receipts, though i don’t think i ever saved ones of the IP tracking i did to prove it was this bunch. buchichu & musajirou have also just always been negative voices on this website, musajirou frequently would reblog mine & friend’s personal posts with needlessly negative & pointlessly rude comments about literally EVERYTHING, not just fandom discourse. they’d loudly shit talk half the fandom, even people who had never really interacted with them or spoken of them.
tothestarsabove hardblocked me out of the blue, and when i asked wtf i did, told me i was an “elitist” who essentially thought that you had to obsessively memorize every single minuscule detail of pokeani to be a ~true fan~ and proceeded to say that i alienated new fans by deeming them unworthy. this was likely in reaction to me loudly voicing my disgust for genwunners, people who think you are only a true pokemon fan if you like gen one and no other gens. this, and the fact that i am wildly autistic and love to infohoard/infodump. allistics see that and frequently think i am flexing knowledge on them, but really i am just excited to tell them about a new thing. i guess that was all fine, i don’t really want to be friends with someone who is that committed to misunderstanding me, and the fact that they guilt tripped me when i called them out on it really didn’t help lol.
...except that after, when all my friends blocked them for their shitty behaviour, they pretty much sent them messages day and night asking whyyyyyy did you blooccccckkk meeeee. as if it wasn’t... blatantly obvious.
velvetviolence just fuckin sucks, man. she made me and my friends feel like shit for like, a whole year before fucking off to leave more broken people in whatever new fandom she hopped to. i talk about it in detail here.
i didn’t save receipts of most of this cause shits just exhausting and i’d rather block and run and warn my friends lol.
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