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thesilentmedium · 3 months

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Silent But Friendly || Jonas & Parker

TIMING: When Jonas was still in the hospital SETTING: The Hospital PARTIES: @thesilentmedium & @wonder-in-wings SUMMARY: Parker visits Jonas and brings shrimp! Glorious Shrimp. WARNINGS: Domestic Abuse TW (Both men had terrible dads)

The soft sounds of pencil on paper could be heard from the hospital room as Jonas scribbled away at the portrait on his paper. It was of his family friend Jamie who was currently passed out on the couch in the room in a rather unflattering position. Jonas could have taken a picture to show Lil later but the drawing was a good way to get some of his depth perception back, or so he hoped. He had been informed that his left eye was badly damaged and that the chances of him seeing out of it again were low. He was doing his best to get used to the changes this entailed, especially relearning how far objects were in front of him.

More than once he managed to run into the door frame leading to the bathroom. Lil had practically banned him from walking around on his own for the time being, which left Jonas with little to do other than sketch while he waited for Jamie to wake up. He didn’t mind though, the feeling of the pencil going across the paper was soothing. The repetitive action kept him grounded in the now rather than the past. He would have to make sure he thanked Andy properly for giving into his request for it. He was also glad that the bruises on his wrists were mostly numb at this point or he doubted this activity would be as beneficial as it was now.

The other activity that kept his mind well away from what happened was visitors, something he enjoyed even more than the drawing. He was reminded how much he was cared for by the amount of people showing up to wish him well. Regulars who had found out he was in the hospital sent flowers and cards that now littered any empty space there was in the hospital room. He was hoping his visitor today wasn’t allergic to any of them. He knew Parker was allergic to dogs, but one allergy often led to having others. Jonas paused in his drawing to look towards the door, he was excited for the older man to stop by.

—

A large bag that maintained the temperature of whatever was in it. A spare hand removing itself from its comfort spot on a black-blotched belt (temporarily hollow and missing all of the weapons that usually nestled in their respective holsters) to flex and extend in a subconscious, nervous habit. A room number, leading to a gaze as Parker carefully avoided interacting with most of the staff, though part of him wondered how many of them recognized him from the last time he was there, doing his best and rubbing nis nerves raw in attempts to help Rhett leave while making sure neither of them would’ve been charged with anything. Parker hated hospitals, and his most recent visit, also being his first as he went to retrieve Rhett, was a terrible first impression, though not because of the staff. He never did talk to the older Warden about any of that. He never asked if he had the identities of the fae and werewolf combination that had torn him to shreds. He never brought up how he still felt an uncharacteristic anxiety tug on his stomach on occasion from the incident; he had long since assumed that it was some residual emotion that hadn’t been properly addressed that day or any day after. ‘What’s the matter with you now, boy?’ His father asked frequently, now as he lingered outside of the door to the hospital room Jonas was resting in. ‘You don’t let nothin’ bother you. You just… decide what does?’ The Warden exhaled, shaking his father’s voice out of his head absently before he opened the door slowly and carefully though he knew Jonas wouldn’t have been able to hear it - all the more reason to move slowly. However, as Parker did a quick glance around the room before his blue eyes settled on the beaten, but not deathly visage of one of the Ballard twins, his breath jumped into his throat as they caught a man sleeping in the corner. He didn’t know someone else was going to be there. So, when his eyes found Jonas, his expression carried a hint of surprise. He placed the bag on a chair quietly before he started to sign. “I’m sorry, should I come back later?” Parker asked, much more intelligible now that he wasn’t awkwardly trying to obscure his face and he pointed to the sleeping figure.

—

Jonas smiled as the taller figure made his way into the room. He was glad to see the other man looking well, if only a little nervous. “Hm? Oh, no! That is Jamie, he is a friend of the family. He is here to keep me safe while Lil is out but he was up late last night. I do not think he will wake up.” Jamie was often napping during the day in Jonas’ hospital room, he rarely saw the man stir while talking to those who came to visit him. In fact Jonas was sure alarms could start ringing in the hospital and if he didn’t go over there to wake the man up Jamie would simply sleep through it. Not that he would hear the alarms himself.

Now that he thought about it perhaps that was concerning for someone who was meant to protect him, then again it had been calm since he woke up here a few days ago, something Jonas was mostly grateful for. Times when no one was visiting were the worst though, his mind was free to wander back into the woods. He hadn’t slept properly since the incident and his sketchbook was starting to be filled with the haunting trees that had surrounded him that night. He wasn’t sure if Andy would be happy to find Jonas sketching the scene of his trauma so many times in her gift. He didn’t know what else to do though, talking about it was too difficult he was tired of rehashing the night's events over and over. It was draining to have to speak about what happened, but drawing let him get it out without really acknowledging it was him who was hurt.

He could draw the trees and the man locked inside them didn’t have to be him, it could be anyone. Jonas didn’t feel great wishing this had happened to someone else but he found that he was having a harder time accepting it had happened to him. He knew it had, the evidence was all over his skin, but if he could just pretend it didn’t for a little while he was able to find some peace. That was one of the reasons he was glad Parker decided to visit today. “How have you been? Is your family alright? I hope Blue’s omen wasn’t too bad of one.”

—

“Only if you’re sure.” Parker replied, reading the words that were being signed before he cast one more, lasting glance over to the slumped figure. He was on edge, again, as usual apparently when he interacted with Jonas. If it wasn’t a dog, it was unwarranted kindness. If not that, a stranger in the room, a hospital room, a sterile and unusual place that the Warden had only ever been inside once before, and it was a stressful experience. Noise, movement. Yelling. He shook his head, pulling his gaze away from Jamie and his stare returned to Jonas, dancing over the intricate details and imperfections inflicted on him. The bandage over his eye, the abrasions, bruises. An inspired mind might’ve tried to give words of encouragement, but Parker, as one who never wanted any of his injuries to have attention drawn to them, found none of those words and after he gave a studious gaze to the medium, he responded to Jonas’ inquiries. “My mother got into an accident but she’s fine.” A pause. “Well… my brother said she was fine.” This was partially a lie - Parker hadn’t actually heard anything about Walker or their mother since that call a couple of months ago. He sighed softly, remembering that he promised the older Wright that he’d call more often. “I’ve been…” He faltered again. How had he been? He was missing one more finger than the last time Jonas had seen him, for starters. “It doesn’t matter.” He replied after a moment. “I’m not here for me. I’m here for you.”

—

“I am very sure, it is lovely to see you again.” Jonas peeked over at the bag on the chair, a little curious as to what food Parker brought along. He had made sure not to have lunch in order to have room for the treat. The nurse was concerned at first till he hurriedly explained that his friend was bringing him food. Though now that he was getting a good look at Parker’s face with his uncovered eye, he was beginning to think maybe he should have waited till he was home to have the other bring his food. It was easy to see just how tense the older man was. He understood, hospitals could make quite a number of people uncomfortable, he was one of them. If it weren’t for the salt lining the room and the other ghost proofing steps Lil took he would have been swarmed by the dead. He could still hear them faintly outside his room but thankfully it was muffled enough not to give him one of his usual headaches.

“I am glad to hear she is alright.” Jonas beamed at the other man glad Blue’s message was a minor one this time. His smile faltered a little though as he finally took note of the other man’s hand. His reluctance to answer the question and the new injury made Jonas a little worried. “I do not wish to make you talk about things that make you uncomfortable but, if you do wish to talk, we have quite a lot of time before dinner.” He knew Parker was more of a private man than he was and wasn’t going to push but he did hope the older man still would offer what had happened on his own.

—

He wished he knew why he interacting with Jonas specifically seemed to put him on edge. Was it because of their embarrassing first interaction, where Parker remembered with a grit of his teeth how he looked and he sounded, a tall and proud man reduced to a sniveling mess of nerves? ‘Or it could be that you think he’s hiding something.’ Walker suggested unhelpfully. ‘What’s he asking for, I wonder? Is it because he can speak to the ghosts of the people you’ve killed? Daddy’s little serial killer, remember?’ The Warden didn’t think it was that; he had resigned himself to acknowledging what he had to do in the past. He wasn’t even sure if fae carried spirits with them. ‘Okay okay, maybe it’s so he can learn something about you that he can hold over your head later!’ Walker mused. ‘You don’t have friends, remember? Look at that face. Look at how he’s related to Lil. There’s something simmering, I can feel it–’ “Go away, Walker.” Parker murmured, lowering his head so his lips couldn’t have been read by the bedbound medium. Perhaps it was something as simple as the disarming nature of Jonas. Surely there had to be an ulterior motive. Paranoia wasn’t something Parker drew from often and subsequently, didn’t carry well and especially if it was reserved for Jonas, of all people and creatures. “Why?” He ended up asking as he made eye contact with Jonas once more, his brow furrowed as he obviously asked the question with a genuine tone, even if it was nonverbal. “I don’t understand.” He added, though he wasn’t sure how to embellish the statement further. He didn’t, and that was where the thought stopped before it started to unravel, questions on top of questions on top of the fundamental lack of knowing why Jonas could’ve possibly cared about anything in Parker’s life. None of it was relevant, none of it was interesting or worth discussing.

—

“Why?” Jonas was more used to people shunning his kindness over asking why he was kind. He supposed it was because he genuinely cared, perhaps too much. Or maybe it was simply because his mother had hammered into his head so often that he had to be kind. Maybe he wasn’t actually as nice as he seemed to be and was doing it more from a sense of duty. He sure hadn’t been feeling kind towards the people who landed him in this bed, even going as far as feeling a little glad they were dead and unable to hurt him again. He felt guilty over it, but he was sure he actually cared about things happening to Parker. He felt relieved to hear the other’s mother was okay in the end.

“I think it is normal to be glad that the family of your friends are okay. I also think it is very normal to check in and make sure they are okay themselves. If it feels like I am overstepping your boundaries please let me know. I will make sure to try and not to pry if it seems something is wrong.” Jonas didn’t want the other man to feel like Jonas’ worry was another thing to be bothered by. Or that Jonas was fake in his worry, even if he himself was starting to doubt it.

The incident in the woods had shaken Jonas more than he was willing to let on to most people. He was startled by any sort of movement he happened to catch outside his door, sleep had been so easy before but now he struggled to even close his eyes for five minutes, then there was the feeling in his stomach. One that wasn’t anxiety or sadness. It was anger, frustration at the situation that was surrounding him. An anger that made him question why he was the one to be hurt? What wrong had he done for the world to decide he deserved such a punishment? Perhaps this was why people took up religion, anything to answer why.

—

“You aren’t overstepping.” Parker replied first, though he wasn’t sure why he wanted that to be the first reply. Responding to the rest of it took a little more time for the Warden, however and the latter glanced over at the sleeping figure once more in thought. Jonas said that it was normal. Perhaps that was why it seemed so unusual to him. What did he know about normal? There was a moment of unsigned silence between them as Parker realized just how abnormal everything around them was. He wasn’t normal. Jonas’ ability to see and communicate with ghosts wasn’t normal. The Warden being in a hospital, Jonas almost being killed, the knowledge that Blue was in Jonas’ shadow literally and not metaphorically wasn’t normal. “Is normal what you want right now?” He found himself asking, his brow furrowing ever-so-slightly as he signed to the medium. A pause before he added onto it. “I’m sorry, I’m not adept at normal things. What can I do to be normal for you?” Another pause. “Would me talking about it… make it normal?”

—

“Oh! No I did not mean to insinuate that you were not normal. Perhaps I should have said it was common for one to be worried for their friends and their family.” Jonas would have loved some normalcy in this moment, but his life had never been that way and to suggest that someone else was abnormal was simply rude of him. “You are fine as you are. It was simply an invitation to talk if something had happened.” it was obvious from the missing finger that the other had been in some sort of trouble.

This was Wicked’s Rest though, trouble was the town’s motto. Admittedly when you were away from it for so long it was easy to forget. Perhaps he had been too caught up in his own problems of the past to remember just how horrible this town could be to those around you. No one was truly having a peaceful time in this place. Normal just didn’t exist here either. Chances are the person you were talking to was a hunter or a medium or even a vampire, something he admittedly only learned about upon his return. If they weren’t powered then there was always the chance they had been affected by something that was. Ghosts, fire breathing cats, dogs that brought upon bad omens. It was all there to mess with someone’s day.

“If you like we can move on, I am still interested in what food you brought.” Perhaps a change in subject would save the awkward air between him and Parker. Jonas did want the other man to enjoy his time here even if the circumstances were not the best.

—

How was it that everything he thought, everything he signed out, seemed to make it awkward? It was so strange and, dare one say, abnormal. Parker was used to awkward interactions; it pretty much came with him interacting with anyone outside of Walker or Metzli now, and even then Metzli was strange like him. ‘You wanna blame the dog.’ He wanted to blame the dog. How Jonas perceived him through his own lens of how others must’ve seen him was something Parker never adjusted well to, and their first interaction was branded on the inside of his skull, as was every other first interaction with everyone he’d met. This one was marred with shame, his father’s oppressive shadow looming over him every time any weakness escaped from the Warden whether it was– ‘All of it is your fault, boy. Remember that. Don’t think otherwise.’ So when Jonas offered for him to change conversation topics, to something easier for him to talk about than wherever was going on in his life regardless of how normal or not it was, Parker found some of the tension leaving his body. “Sorry.” He found himself apologizing anyway, his brow knitting with guilt that he didn’t know how to shake. “I just don’t…” He shook his head and waved his hands as though clearing the air. Maybe moving on from the topic would help make it easier to return to it later, once he was more comfortable. “I brought shrimp etouffee.” He explained, his expression altering slightly to be less melancholy as he motioned to the thermal bag. “You said you were okay with shellfish, and it’s warm.”

—

Jonas shook his head when the other man began to apologize. He was beginning to realize that Parker was a man who put a lot of stock in how he appeared to others. Something Jonas understood very well. For a long time he had tried his best to be what his father wanted but he never did live up to the image. Perhaps it was a good thing. If Jonas was anything like his father he wouldn’t be a good person, he wouldn’t be kind or understanding, he wouldn’t be able to talk a ghost into moving on peacefully. Lil wouldn’t love him and he doubted he would have any friends, Jacob never did. He found peace by accepting his father would never love him, even if the man’s words still bothered him from time to time.

Maybe that was something similar to Parker. Someone made the older man feel inadequate, or strange enough for him to stumble in social situations. “Shrimp Etouffee?” Jonas leaned over and opened the bag taking in the food on offer. “It looks delicious!” He had never had such a dish before but was glad Parker thought to bring it along. “Do you want to have some now or should we save it for later?” He was glad the change of topic seemed to get the other to relax a little more.

—

At the expression of interest for what he had brought, Parker found himself altering again, another subtle shift in his demeanor though he was the last person to be able to explain why. “It’s shrimp in roux sauce with broth, some select herbs and served over rice.” He explained, pausing for a moment before adding “I wasn’t sure how you liked spicy, so it’s a little milder than usual.” As he signed this, he realized with a somewhat startling abruptness that Jonas was asking about him but he himself knew astonishingly little about Jonas. He likes his dog, that was the first thing Parker learned. He was a medium, and confident enough in his ability that he didn’t feel the need to hide it from the public. He liked to cook, and at least partially owned a bakery. He was a twin, and the more gentle of the two… which made a small, rotten part of the Warden wonder if that was why he got so viciously attacked. Could he fight? Did he want to fight? Or did he take pride in never having to have had to? When he entered the room earlier, he noticed that Jonas was doing something in a sketchbook so he either wrote or drew. Perhaps both. This lent itself to an idea that Parker had, and he reflected the thought in his expression as he glanced up in contemplation. “I think… having something in front of me gives me something to do in addition to conversing.” He said. “I’d… like to know more about you, if that’s okay.” Another brief pause. “But if you’d like to wait, we can. Like I said, I’m here for you.”

—

“It looks amazing! I have some bowls we can use.” Jonas moved the blanket off his legs, careful to place his sketchbook on the side table first, as he shuffled to get out of the bed. He was glad the garb the hospital gave him didn’t open in the back like he had seen on so many shows. He didn’t think Parker needed to see what underwear he was wearing as he shuffled around, keeping his hand to the bed for reference. He really wasn’t meant to be moving on his own with his tendency to bump into things but he didn’t think simply going to the bags across the room would be a big deal. It was mostly open space. “I am um alright with spice, my mother was quite the fan of it in her cooking.”

He spoke in what he hoped was a quiet tone, as he tugged a couple of plastic bowls and spoons out of the bag in front of him. With people bringing food Jonas had asked Lil to make sure there was something on hand just in case. He carefully made his way back over to the bed, only nearly bumping into Parker and the chair and muttering a small apology as he sat on the edge of the bed, bowls in hand. He was a little surprised Parker asked about him, he offered a little smile and set the bowls aside so his hands were free.

“I do not mind, what would you like to know?” Jonas did his best to keep his eyes on Parker as he scooped out a serving of Shrimp Etouffee into each bowl. He was excited to try it, cooking for Jonas was an act of love so any food made by his friends was something he would treasure even if the taste was a little off. Though luckily for him the food Parker had made was delicious.

—

The Warden had a mind to tell the boy that he didn’t need to trouble himself with getting up (as Parker had brought dishware of his own for the occasion) but before he could, the medium had already made the motion to get out of bed. Instinctively, one of Parker’s hands reached out, ready to catch Jonas if the latter stumbled or fell but he didn’t and instead, sharp blue eyes were glued to his tottering form as he shuffled to retrieve the bowls and plasticware. While Jonas moved around, though, it gave Parker a chance to observe the man’s body movements, as though to assess what damage, if any, had been done. An arm did make it to the medium when the latter almost bumped into him, a firm, but gentle reassurance to keep him stable - not that Jonas particularly needed Parker’s help, but perhaps Parker was just still too raw with watching as Rhett hobbled from place to place. ‘Whatever that means.’ Walked scoffed. He didn’t take his eyes off of Jonas until he had sat back down, where he nodded and collected the bowls briefly, maneuvering around so that he could still see Jonas sign while he served them up. “Anything you’re willing to tell me. About you. About what you like or do when you aren’t at work.” He replied before heaping some rice into each bowl, then draping the etouffee over it. “And maybe… if you want, I can say some stuff about me, too.” He added after handing Jonas his bowl with the fork in it and sitting down carefully in the chair next to the hospital bed. Still tense, but trying harder than usual to just relax.

—

What did Jonas do outside of work? Now that he thought of it, most of his time was set in his bakery. He woke up ridiculously early to go there and warm up the ovens while he started making the bread for the breakfast rush, setting up bagels and doughnuts so that they were as fresh as possible for his customers. He didn’t leave till just after closing time around 8pm. He was there most of the week. He really was in need of help, it couldn’t be healthy the way he handled his business, but he always did feel guilty leaving Andy there alone when he couldn’t be in and he didn’t dare make her work more than eight hours. It was probably why his friend circle was so small in the town. You couldn’t really make friends if you were at work all day. It didn’t help that when he was out of work he could feel them following him, whoever they were.

He munched on his food a little as he contemplated this new discovery, not expecting it to come about from a simple question. When he was free from here he would have to make sure he set about hiring new people and maybe learning some self defense so he would feel more free to enjoy his day. “If I am being honest there is not much that I do. I sometimes go to a club for dancing, I like to paint scenery from the town, I go on walks with Blue. I visit tea shops. I adore good tea. Occasionally I go out in a wig and dress…being followed has… limited my activities.” Jonas offered a nervous smile hoping he didn’t sound too plain for the other man. “I would love to hear more about you, what is it you do for a living? And of course if you wish to share your hobbies I am more than happy to learn about them!”

—

Parker would’ve been lying if he considered something like ‘going out in wigs and a dress’ to be on the same level as just about everything else Jonas had said, but the Warden himself had eclectic hobbies and… niche interests, to put it mildly, not to mention he simply wasn’t the type to judge someone based on something like that. Jonas mentioning that he liked tea was a little closer to something the Warden could identify with, though, having grown not fond of it but it was something he did with Burrow now, and it wasn’t something he hated. And, of course, the explanation was there and gone, too short for Parker to really think about when he anticipated the obligatory ‘what about you’ from Jonas. He thought for a moment, allowing whatever hesitancy he held about speaking on himself to be shown in his facial animation; the faint twitch of his brow, how he looked down and his eyes danced as though reading from an invisible script. There was no script. ‘Just be simple. It’s so easy not to be weird.’ If Parker had a nickel every time Walker told him that while playfully nudging his shoulder with an elbow. “Yeah, I’d be wary, too.” He replied before taking some bites of his food. He didn’t ask Jonas how it was, though he probably should’ve, but Jonas was eating it. And he didn’t seem the type to outright say that he didn’t like something. Maybe he should ask.

‘Oh my god you’re so stubborn. Just answer the damn question.’ “I’m a collector.” Parker explained. “I have an entomology exhibition at the science museum.” That was as simple as he could make it. It would do. “...Insects.” He added. “Hobbies.” He glanced up in thought, eating more of his etouffee. “I like to swim.” More idling as he legitimately thought about what else he did. “I’ve been meaning to go to the theater to see their musicals.” He scoffed. “I suppose I don’t really have that many hobbies. I’m pretty… boring.”

—

“Oh I forgot my manners, this is very delicious.” Jonas was being honest, Parker was a good cook, something Jonas would note for later. He could perhaps have the man help out during holiday dinners, if he was free. He nodded, he was definitely wary and this latest incident did nothing to help his growing paranoia. He was hopeful that lil would be able to find something about Astra to help get this situation under control. He didn’t want to be so scared of going outside or of sleeping.

Jonas paused trying to think if he’d ever bothered to go to the museum recently. “That is quite impressive, that your work is good enough to be in a museum.” He offered a smile and nodded when Parker explained his hobbies. “Swimming is fun, though I do not imagine you do much of it in this cold weather. Just because you do not have many activities that you do does not mean you are boring. It just means you know what you like and stick to it.” Jonas was never one to let a negative comment slide. His mother hadn’t been either and he knew it was sometimes important to remind people that they were fine as they were. He was never sure if others got annoyed by it but he was hoping it was more helpful than harmful.

—

The compliment was signed, and it was followed by the faint creep of heat across the Warden’s cheeks, though it wasn’t there for very long as the ghost of a smile threatened to pull on the corner of his mouth before it slid back into its normal location. “There are indoor pools,” Parker replied after taking another bite, hoping it disguised some of the unwarranted emotion that had happened onto his face. “And as for the museum… it’s science and history. Insects are… easy. To incorporate.” That compliment was waved off with a noncommittal shrug; not something worth praising, in his opinion. There was a pause as something else crossed Parker’s mind, and ergo his face as he thought on it for a moment. He shook his head to himself. Mentioning his father was irrelevant. ‘So long as you never forget what I tell you, boy. The first of which being to straighten up.’ The Warden straightened up. “I found a tea place recently.” He continued after the brief lull in the conversation; he really was terrible at initiating and maintaining small talk. “Their menu is… expansive. It’s called ‘Steeper’s Stop’, have you heard of them?” Another pause. “What… kind of tea do you like?”

—

“That is true.” Jonas still couldn’t imagine going to a pool during a Maine winter even if it was inside. The cold seemed to reach even the smallest of cracks in a building. If Jonas was home all of the fire places would likely be working hard to heat the old house. Then again Jonas had always been weak to the cold. Going outside these days required more layers, thankfully it was a blessing when it came to working near the bakery ovens. “That does not mean it is not still impressive.” He doubted a museum would take just any work offered to it.

“I have, though I have yet to visit it.” Jonas paused as he moved his spoon around his food, thinking about his teas. He had quite the collection at home from earl greys to peppermint tea. “Mm I think my favorites would be peach tea and chamomile. I have found a rather good supplier of loose leaf teas for both. Oh there is also a hot cinnamon spice tea that I got in order to try it but the… Well I ended up here before I got the chance. Perhaps when I am out you would like to come over and try it with me.” It was still hard to admit outloud what had happened even if he knew not saying it didn’t stop the past from being the past.

—

If Parker had been a little more… normal, as Jonas had assured him it was okay not to be earlier, he would’ve thought it impressive that there were so many different tea combinations, and there were people who could list off that information as though it was second nature to them. ‘That’s what you do with insects, weirdo.’ But he couldn’t; to him, it was relative to people knowing a plethora of pop culture references. Such was the curse of being Parker Wright, always watching through the window and never quite feeling like he was welcome in. And that was okay. When the medium trailed off for a moment before seemingly recovering, Parker realized one reason why he preferred signing sometimes; he was always bad with tone. Always. And it had gotten him into trouble when he was a child. Walker joked that he was ‘comically serious’ but it took him an embarrassingly long amount of time to understand the meaning behind different tones, but with the lack of sound, he could spend more time observing facial expressions and body movement. Jonas moved past the snag in the sentence and Parker’s blue eyes turned downwards to examine the remnants of his food for a moment. “Yeah. I’ll try some. Sounds ideal for this time of year/” He replied, glancing back up before his hands tapped each other for a moment in thought. “I was wondering… I’m… sorry about what happened to you.” He repeated his apology from earlier. “If you want… I can teach you self-defense.” Parker suggested, that unfamiliar uncertainty returning to his own body language; he almost preferred this part if it was online but as his father hissed for him to get himself together, he did so and he squared his shoulders subconsciously, straightening up and he looked at the medium earnestly. It wasn’t a false invitation, if anything; he didn’t make those.

—

Jonas perked up considerably at Parker agreeing to come over and try his tea, it always was more fun to try new things with friends though his face fell when the other man mentioned he was sorry for what happened. He really was doing his best to be in denial of it all when he could. He stirred the food around in his plate as he thought of it, only half was gone. Self defense would be something he needed to learn eventually. He knew he couldn’t deny that fact any longer, but it would keep the event in the back of his mind and make it harder to simply avoid it.

Still he doubted he would get such a sincere offer to be taught again and Parker didn’t seem like he’d be a harsh teacher. “Okay. I would like to learn.” Jonas offered a tired smile along with his response. He would do his best as long as Parker was willing to teach him. Maybe the activity would prove a good distraction from everything as well. Something to look forward to rather than dread. His brain was hardwired to always try and find the good in a situation and he was sure he could find the good in all this as well if he tried hard enough.

—

There was a sense of unease for a moment as Jonas ruminated on his answer, despite Parker seeming professional and willing to take whichever answer the medium would’ve given him. Maybe he should’ve mentioned that he was teaching Lil how to swim? Then again, maybe that would’ve just made things worse. Or maybe– ‘Okay okay, you’re officially thinking too much. Cut it out.’ And, as it turned out, Jonas said yes anyway. He didn’t realize it but Parker exhaled a quiet sigh of relief. He nodded slowly and this time, he did allow a small, upwards tilt of the corner of his mouth, not confident or seeming like it belonged there but it was there all the same. “Affirmative. Once you get out, we can train, then… have some tea.” He suggested. The Warden still wasn’t sure what particular paths in life had to have been taken to have him act as the teacher for the Ballard twins, but as he sat in that uncomfortable hospital room, warm food sitting on his lip in a bowl and enjoying their silent conversations, he didn’t think he minded those paths. He wasn’t sure how easy it was going to be to teach Jonas, but at present, he wasn’t entirely worried about it.

#domestic abuse tw #writing #wonderinwings #parker

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humaforever · 10 months

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I want to sit on their lap and feed them grapes.

(also Huma, obviously. Harry is talking about Uma)

Obviously their crew is involved, because I love them

______________________________

One lunch. That's all they wanted. One normal lunch.

But alas, Harry would not allow that, so the crew of the Lost Revenge would just have to suffer.

"Look at her Gil" Harry sighed dreamily

Gil glanced up in the direction that Harry was so intently staring at and found that Uma was talking to that Audrey girl. She seemed to be telling a story as she absently indulged on a fruit cup.

"I see her" Gil said, not paying much attention as his main focus was on his food

"Do you? Do you really? Because you don't seem to be admiring her beauty the way you should" Harry said

"I'll leave that to you Harry. Besides, she doesn't look any different than she did when she was sitting with us two minutes ago." Gil said

"It doesn't matter" Harry gripped Gil's arm "She got a new outfit, did ya see that?"

"Yes Harry, I've been with her all day" Gil said

"Do you see how pretty she looks in it!?" Harry said

"Yes Harry" Gil said flatly

Harry sighed as he dramatically laid half of his body on the table "Gods I just want to sit on her lap and feed her those grapes she's eating"

"YOU WANT TO WHAT!?" Jonas suddenly exclaimed, he had been avoiding the conversation before but he could no longer do that

Harry raised his brow at the other boy "You heard me"

"You are sick, you know that?" Jonas said pointing a fork at Harry

"I'll tell you when I find a fuck to give" Harry said

"It's just crazy to me that you would say that when you know there's children around" Bonny shook her head

"Children?" Harry questioned, as far as he was concerned there were no young children in sight

"Desiree, Harry. You know she's just a baby" Bonny said

"Fuck you!" Desiree exclaimed "I'm older than you!"

"Babies aren't allowed to say fuck" Gonzo told Desiree

"Forget the child, he said that right in front of my salad" Jonas said

Gil rolled his eyes "Here we go again with the salad"

"I'm starting to think that Jonas is more romantically involved with this salad than Harry is with Uma" Bonny said

"Not possible " Harry said "No one has ever been more romantically involved with anything or anyone than I am with Uma"

"Gag me with a knife" Gonzo muttered

"My salad is still present!" Jonas cried

"Fuck you and your salad Jonas" Harry said "I'll straddle Uma and feed her your god damn salad"

Jonas gasped

Desiree hit her head against Bonny's shoulder "I think I'm gonna puke"

"Didn't you ever learn about, I don't know, decency, privacy?" Bonny asked Harry

"No, and neither did you so I don't want to hear about it" Harry said

"Everyone around us can hear you Harry" Gil said

"Good, they need to know that I'm Uma's" Harry said

"Trust me, they know" Gonzo said

"I think that message was clear when she pinned you against the wall during the first day of class" Desiree said

Harry smiled widely "That was fun"

"Well, as long as you're having fun" Bonny said dryly

"As long as Uma's having fun" Harry clarified

Jonas chuckled "Man you are down so bad"

"Sounds like a compliment" Harry said "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go feed my girl a grape" he said as he got up and left the table

"At least that's over" Gil said as he watched Harry saddle up next to Uma

There was a moment of silence

"...I wanna feed Uma a grape" Desiree spoke

"Oh God, he's influenced the children!" Bonny cried

Jonas took Desiree's face in his hands "I know your feble young mind doesn't understand yet but this is not the path you want to take! Des we can't deal with another one!"

"Shut up. And get your hands off of me!" Desiree said slapping Jonas' hands

Gil and Gonzo shared an exasperated glance.

Who were they kidding, this crew would never catch a break from themselves.

#thank you for the prompt #huma #lost revenge crew #fanfiction

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springautumn · 7 months

Text

𝐇𝐚𝐥𝐜𝐲𝐨𝐧

Eddie Munson x Reader

part one | part two

Summary: Never in a million years did you see this happening, nor did you want this to happen. But the breakdown was inevitable. (aka break up sex)

Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI; smut; p in v sex (unprotected); consensual sex (Reader is 18 and Eddie is 20); fingering; angst; hurt/no comfort

A/N: I rewatched Skam (original Norway) and the Eva/Jonas breakup scene had me bawling! (Repost since it didn't show up in the tags the first time)

This wasn’t how it was supposed to go.

Everything was perfect. You never knew happiness like this – the kind of warmth that bloomed inside and filled your tummy with butterflies. You felt it every time you were with him.

When you spent your days at Lover’s Lake, dancing to the songs playing from the van’s radio. When you spent your nights lying in bed with him and laughing at his jokes. When you spent pretty much every day with Eddie, when he smiled that infectious smile.

But this feeling was indescribable. It felt like agony, like your blood was churning and sucking every thought, every feeling and every word into a black hole, burning through your body and leaving a giant scab where your heart was supposed to be.

For Eddie, the feeling was different. He knew what heartbreak felt like and it was fucking terrible. It felt like he was stood frozen, unable to move no matter how much his mind was screaming at him to, rendering himself helpless until hours later, when his anger would rip him apart.

Right now, as you stood a few steps away from each other, you both felt this awful feeling in your own ways, the short distance between you now an island.

You both knew this was coming one way or another. You both came into this relationship with no experience, yet that never mattered. The love you had for each other was bigger than that, pouring out of you in waves, flooding your time together with bliss. Soon enough, you realised it wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows.

No matter how safe and loved you felt when you were with him, you could feel Eddie slipping away. You began to spend less time together- from every day to once a week to maybe twice a month. When you did spend time together, it didn’t feel the same anymore.

The less time you spent together, the more your insecurities came to the surface. You worried he had found someone else, someone better than you, someone more like him. Likewise, Eddie felt he was not worthy of you. He thought you would soon escape the clutches of the small town that was Hawkins, ready to leave him behind after graduation and move onto greater pastures.

You were afraid that bringing the bad stuff to the surface would taint the good. So, you buried your feeling, choosing to ignore the problem and spend time with Eddie like you had before. With that, Eddie’s worries drifted away, finding himself back into his halcyon with you- he thought that since you stayed, nothing was wrong.

You stayed with him because no one could make you feel as happy as Eddie could. You chose to focus on the good rather than the bad, thinking that with time, it will all go away.

It was never going to be just good. That nagging feeling started to grow in the pit of your stomach, building and building, slowly at a snail’s pace. Nothing had changed- you were both stuck on a bridge where neither of you budged until it was too large for you to ignore. That was when it hit you – unless the both of you fixed it, this wasn’t going to work anymore.

But that was the problem – neither of you knew how.

And you told him so, stood at his desk while Eddie sat on his bed, his eyes jetting across the floor as he processed his words.

Deep down, a part of him agreed with you. He loved you and he knew you loved him too. He also knew he loved you so much that he was willing to do anything to save the relationship. He would change; he would learn to until his body bled.

He was about to argue as much, plead his case until he made the mistake of looking at you. His words died on his tongue at the sight of your tears, taking in your hunched stance to your bruising grip on the table behind you. This was eating at you on the inside.

He made a promise to you right from the beginning that he would never hurt you. But he broke that promise without even meaning to, making him feel a thousand times more shattered than he felt five seconds ago.

Eddie’s lips trembled. Blinking away the sting of tears, he stood up, slowly approaching you until the breadth of distance between you closed and you had to crane your neck to look him in the eye. He cupped your cheek with a shaky had, his thumb gently wiping away your tears that trickled down your face. You leaned into his touch, closing your eyes when you felt his noise tenderly brushing against yours.

Eddie closed the remaining distance between you, capturing your lips in a gentle kiss. With a small, sharp inhale, you kissed him back without hesitation, melting into each sweet kiss after the next. You moved together, Eddie’s arms weaving around your waist and your hands cradling the back of his neck, gripping each other like a lifeline, desperate to cling to what you had before it was all gone.

His tongue ran over your bottom lip, prying your lips apart as he licked into your mouth. You sank into the intense need to feel him, moving together as the languid kisses turned ravenous and more desperate.

This was a bad idea. But you needed this. After God knows how long, you needed this and Eddie knew – somehow, he always knew.

Your fingers dug into Eddie’s hair, gently moving up until you were scratching his scalp as he pulled away from him to catch your breath. Eddie didn’t let you go far, nose-to-nose with him, his eyes burning into yours, gazing at you in clear sadness before something in his eyes changed.

You held onto him tight when he lifted you, turning to his bed and reaching behind you with one hand, removing the covers and setting you down on your back. He lifted his shirt off before he leaned down, crawling until his face hovered over yours, resuming his kisses, slow and earth-shattering.

You felt like you were floating, all the thoughts in your head drifting away the moment you gave in. Nothing else mattered, just Eddie’s lips slotting over yours, kissing you over and over as if he couldn’t get enough of your taste.

His hands wandered up and down your sides, tugging your shirt up until was completely lifted off you. The goosebumps that rose from the cool air was soon replaced with the warmth that radiated from Eddie, his body flush against yours.

You let out a whimper when Eddie dropped a chaste kiss on your neck, moving to kiss down your body. He stopped when he reached the waistband of your jeans, looking up at you to see the same unreadable expression in your feature. You both knew that if he went further down, you would slip back into his arms and never leave, starting the cycle all over again. He couldn’t do that to you, not when you were so close to escaping the trap.

Eddie couldn’t look at you without caving. The sight of your face in bliss would send him over the edge, rip his heart open until he begged you to stay – but he still had some pride in him. Quickly unbuttoning your jeans and pulling them off your legs, Eddie then moved up and buried his head in your chest, kissing and sucking the exposed skin above your bra.

You forgot how to breathe, the background fading into white noise. You could feel yourself slowly slipping away from your scattered thoughts, until all that you could focus on was the feeling of Eddie’s lips on your skin, the feeling of his rings gently pressing into your thighs as Eddie’s hand wandered up to your underwear.

His hand slipped underneath the damp garment. You let out a gasp when he pushed his calloused finger inside you, stopping when he was two knuckles deep, sliding in and out with ease.

Your head lulled back onto the soft pillows, gasping for breath as Eddie worked his finger in and out, your legs beginning to tremble as the warm pleasure built in your core. Eddie pulled down your bra, immediately laving his tongue across your sensitive nipple.

Your hands closed around his biceps, fingers digging crescents in his skin when Eddie sunk a second finger inside, a cry escaping you at the tight sensation. He held you in place with a hand on your hip as you writhed on the bed, working a steady rhythm with his fingers.

He knew when you were reaching the end. He memorised your tells from experience, so he pushed even further, curling his fingers to meet your sweet spot, letting out a groan against your chest when you clenched around his fingers, your gasps turning into moans and whimpers. Moments later, you opened your mouth in a silent scream, letting out moans as your orgasm washed over you, body trembling as the pleasure filled you.

Eddie pulled himself free and lifted to his knees, his slick-covered fingers travelling down your stomach, slowly caressing your skin as if it was a work of art. He pulled your underwear off, groaning when he saw your wet pussy, the slick on your thighs.

You let out a soft hum, your body relaxing against the bed as you came down from your high, reaching for Eddie when he leaned back over you, his chest meeting your bare breasts. Your hands dropped down to his belt buckle, hurriedly taking the belt off and pushing his jeans down until they were off entirely.

You wonder what it would be like to kiss Eddie now. Should you kiss him now? Would it be a gentle kiss or would it be heated, passionate? You cupped his cheek, running your thumb gently against his full lips, unable to tear your gaze away from his.

Eddie watched you for a moment before he dipped down to your neck, trailing hot kisses down the side, taking off his boxers. He needed to feel you fall apart under him, wanting this to last forever, wanting to leave his imprint on you.

He eased himself inside, pushing in slowly to the hilt, both of you letting out sighs. It had been too long. His hand stroked your thigh, encouraging you to wrap a leg around his waist as he thrust in, starting at a steady rhythm while his kisses on your neck grew fiercer.

You moved together, his thrusts deep as you rolled your hips to meet his, your hands mapping a trail across his back, needing to feel him. Being in his arms, letting the euphoria take over you both – it felt so right. Yet, you could feel what this was, what it meant. Maybe that’s why it felt different, why it felt so much better than the times before.

Eddie’s thrusts picked up, becoming stronger and deeper, your moans growing louder. You clenched your jaw when he hit your sweet spot over and over, willing yourself to push down the telltale warmth building inside you.

Eddie moved his head away, lifting to lock his eyes onto yours. “Let go.”

You shook your head, tears brimming to the surface. Eddie softened his gaze, his hand coming up to cradle your head, thumb lovingly stroking your temple as he nodded encouragingly.

“Let go,” he softly repeated.

The tears spilled out onto your cheeks as your back arched, your moans turning into a cry. You came again, your body spasming as you throbbed around him, the warmth seeping into you until you were boneless.

Eddie cried out, closing his eyes as his thrusts stuttered, your orgasm coaxing his. He pulled out, stroking himself before he spilled over your thighs, shuddering breaths escaping him as his chest heaved.

Hours later, the light of the setting sun streamed through the curtains, casting a warm glow over both of you. You had laid down, facing each other afterwards, caressing each other until the shuddering died down and since then, you were unable to move, unable to look away from each other.

A stray tear escaped your eye, falling down the bridge of your nose. Eddie gently brushed the wetness away, pushing up to place a lingering kiss on your forehead.

The tears began to flow as it sunk in.

It was over.

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson angst #eddie munson smut #stranger things fanfic #my writing

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lexinoctura · 2 years

Note

Right back at ya!

Who would be the other two: Teal’c, Ronon Dex or Teyla?

Who would you pick: Jack O’Neill, Daniel Jackson, John Sheppard, Rodney McKay, Cameron Mitchell, Jonas Quinn or Ronon Dex?

Who is the best head of SG (SGC or SGA): George Hammond, Hank Landry, Elisabeth Weir, Sam Carter or Richard Woolsey?

Who is the best enemy: Goa’uld, Replicators, Ori or Wraith?

If you could pick three characters (no matter if dead or alive) to create a team, who would they be?

Where would you be rather stationed: SGC or Atlantis?

What’s your favourite ship (canon or not) from each show?

What rare/alien species did you like the best?

.Who is your favourite Alien (person/creature not from Earth).

And last but not least: Favourite male character of each show and favourite female character of each show?

Bonus question: Least favourite male and female character from each show?

Okay, lets see…

Who would be the other two: Teal’c, Ronon Dex or Teyla? -> Hmm… Teyla beats Ronon, but either ends up in a tie with Teal'c or manages to beat him by like… one second; She is really fast and while T has the tactical skills as well as the muscles, he is not as fast, and does not rely that much on his skills to dodge or keep his whole body protected

Who would you pick: Jack O’Neill, Daniel Jackson, John Sheppard, Rodney McKay, Cameron Mitchell, Jonas Quinn or Ronon Dex? -> As a buddy? Sheppard (love his humor); as a leader? O'Neill (has great skills in that area and is rather loose in his interactions)

Who is the best head of SG (SGC or SGA): George Hammond, Hank Landry, Elisabeth Weir, Sam Carter or Richard Woolsey? -> Let's kill Landry, Woolsey and Weir before we even start that question; Neither of them had my liking, and the first two were basically just replacements because the others died/didnt want to anymore I would say Carter. She knows what its like to be in the field, so she has a better understanding of how and why her people react the way they do; AND(!) she goes with on missions and does not just sit in a comfy chair

Who is the best enemy: Goa’uld, Replicators, Ori or Wraith? -> Wraith for me. I like the whole concept of it, where they are (mostly/often) evil, but not out of their greed for power, but because they are hungry; And I love Todd 😂

If you could pick three characters (no matter if dead or alive) to create a team, who would they be? -> Sheppard as a leader (because i would like to interact with him more, and he is more same-level than jack is), Teyla as the negotiator and Dani as the smart boy

Where would you be rather stationed: SGC or Atlantis? -> Atlantis, for sure! Tho only with a ZPM or the intergalacti gatebridge in order, because while I dont need to see my familiy and friends every week, I do not want to spent 3 weeks (one way!) to get to Earth; And I would really like to meet more of the cultures they show there

What’s your favourite ship (canon or not) from each show? -> Jack/Sam in SG-1, and Sheppard/Teyla in SG-A; Never watched SG-U and dont intend to either 😂

What rare/alien species did you like the best? -> The Unas 😂 Damn, I love that episode where Daniel meets Chaka, and has to learn that just because he is more animalistic, that doesnt mean that he is uncultivated or dumb

Who is your favourite Alien (person/creature not from Earth). -> Ronon Dex :D I mean: "You've gotta see this guy in action. He is an incredible shot, none of my guys can beat him in a fight, and he's ex-military."

And last but not least: Favourite male character of each show and favourite female character of each show? -> SG-1: Sam and Daniel; SG-A: John and Teyla :D

Bonus question: Least favourite male and female character from each show? -> SG-1: Hathor (stupid snakehead) and Landry (never really liked him, he was too… blablabla); SG-A: Princess Harmony (the one that constantly lied to Sheppard and then portrait Rodney as her hero; spoiled little brat!) and Woolsey (I mean… he is IOA!) *I mean, even in my notes for a possible Teyla/Sheppard fanFic, I explicitly stated the following: Princess Harmony (S4) -> DOES NOT EXIST!

This is fun, thank you!! :D

#Stargate #SG-1 #sg1 #SG-A #atlantis #ask me #about me

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impossiblemakerfire · 6 months

Text

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poguesrforlife · 4 years

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Young and Beautiful | Rudy Pankow - Part 2

You guys are literally the best! Thank you so much for all the amazing feedback for this little weird imagination in my head :’) BTW I have no clue how the movie business works or if this is even close to accurate but just bare with my fantasies here okay :D xoxo

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4

Trigger warning: It gets a bit very smutty people, be prepared, angsty ???idk

Word count: 3295 (so I went totally over the top with this once again)

Y/N just got the role of her lifetime, starring beside the cast of Outer Banks in the second season as JJ’s love interest. It’s a dream come true and gets even dreamier when she meets Rudy Pankow her alleged love interest. Lines start to blur between reality and film and Y/N is left wondering if taking a leap of faith is worth risking her career.

A couple minutes later you found yourself in your trailer alone. Images and thoughts were flashing in your head, all of them revolving around that kiss. That kiss that didn’t feel like a normal kiss, or any kiss you ever had before. That kiss had been pure magic. There was no other way to describe it. Alone the thought of it send your heart into overdrive and quickened your breath.

And that wasn’t even the worst part, in a couple of hours you were expected back on set after a scene change and doing that kiss with Rudy over and over only half naked.

You had to calm yourself down right this second. Your possible feelings for him couldn’t get in the way of your big break. There was so much more on the line.

A soft knock on your trailer door pulled you out of your thoughts and after opening the door you were faced with a grinning Madelyne and Madison who immediately snuck into your four walls for now.

“What was that?” Maddie C squealed as she sat down on the couch and pulled you down with her.

“What do you mean?” You feigned innocence and looked at them quizzically.

“Hun, you’re a great actress but not that of a good actress and neither is Rudy,” Bailey stated and raised a brow at you.

“Like, Chase and I had our moments on set and even JD and Bailey but we never got so into it that we ignored the ending of the scene,” Maddie pointed out, big smile on her face.

“Guys,” You groaned, just thinking about the embarrassing moment from before. “I don’t even know what happened out there,” You admitted quietly hands over your face as you leaned back.

The girls shared a worried gaze between them as they looked back at you.

“Are you okay though?” Maddie asked and patted your thigh lovingly.

You were so grateful for these two in that moment. You wished you could just bawl in their arms and let all your frustration out but bigger matters were at hand.

“Yes, I’m fine… well I don’t really have a choice,” You mused and gave them a reassuring smile.

Bailey looked at you with a sympathetic smile and closed her arms around you.

“No matter what else might’ve happened out there, you were great. Really really great,” She praised you and you couldn’t help but laugh at her sweet words.

“Thanks for supporting my kissing skills, I guess.” The girls chimed in with laughter at that and you stayed cuddled on the couch until it was time to get back on set.

“You’re going to rock this,” Maddie assured you when she saw your faltering confidence the closer you got to that scene, “and then we can talk about it properly after you had some time to think.”

You squeezed both of the girls’ hands as they led you back to the cameras and the action. You were grateful for their support but the only person you wanted to talk to right now was Rudy. Maybe you shouldn’t have split immediately after the scene and actually talked to him so it wouldn’t be awkward now. But you were an actress after all, you could pretend to not care as much for just a bit longer.

As he came into view with his soft blond waves, where hours before your hands had been entangled in, your heart stopped for a second.

But he didn’t seem to be too bothered as he joked around with the guys and laughed carelessly. Had you been the only one affected by the kiss? Was he just a better actor than you had thought? The thought stung but you knew it would only be for the better. You could be just as nonchalant as him.

“What’re we laughing about?” You chimed in and smiled at the guys. You cringed a bit at your overly joyous voice but couldn’t take it back even if you wanted to as all eyes were fixed on you.

“Rudy just told us how terrible his first kiss was,” Chase explained and smirked at his co-star.

So they had definitely talked about your kiss otherwise they wouldn’t be on the topic, would they? You tried your hardest to look unbothered by it, hoping your face wasn’t turning crimson again.

“Well, I sure hope that I wasn’t your first kiss then,” You joked, “For your sake and for mine.” You bit your bottom lip as your eyes traveled over his face.

He regarded you with an amused little smile playing on his lips as he took you in.

“What? Y/N, as if. Yours would win all the most passionate kiss awards in the country,” JD babbled which earned him a stern look from Rudy and an eye-roll from you.

“At Rudy’s first kiss he actually accidentally spit a piece of gum-“ Chase started giggly but got interrupted by Rudy pushing a hand over his mouth and pushing him out of your ear-shot.

“Would you shut up!” He warned him under his breath and you had to suppress a giggle at his antics.

You could imagine all too well what might have happened with the piece of gum and the poor girl.

For now though, you were just happy that all seemed to be calm and collected between the two of you.

Sooner than you would’ve liked however you were back in business and a dozen people were around you, giving you instructions, doing your make-up, positioning you right and and and…

You loved your job, you really did, but right now you just wanted some piece and quiet.

You were led together into the bedroom of JJ in the Chateau for the scene. It was supposed to be a bit more intimate and shown sex scene than what Chase and Madelyne had done in the first season. You couldn’t help but feel a bit uncomfortable but this wasn’t the first time that you did something like this and you were sure no one would ever get used to that kind of film-making.

The directors sent everyone out of the room they did not especially need to make it as comfortable for the both of you as possible which you thought was infinitely thoughtful.

“You guys have the scene in your hands okay?” Jonas assured you as he went over it with the both of you. “You do only what you’re comfortable with and stop whenever you want.”

“Thanks,” Rudy nodded at his kindness and dropped an arm around your waist. “You’ll tell me how far you want to go okay?”

“We’ll work it out as we go?” You suggested and he pulled you closer to him with a sweet smile. His lips met your forehead in a soft kiss and your eyes fluttered shut for a second at the gentle contact.

“You’ll be great, I’m sure about that,” Valerie gave you a thumbs up and then cameras were rolling.

Rudy’s arm was still around your waist as he led you to the beginning of the scene.

“Promise me, you’ll be honest with me when it’s too much” He whispered, lips grazing the shell of your ear barely and a shiver went down your spine.

You turned your head slowly, eyes locking with his and the incredible saturating blue colour. You didn’t realise how close he was until then. Just a step forward and you would be kissing him.

“Promise,” you gave him your word and watched as relief washed over his face. A simple gesture as him making sure you were comfortable was worth more than any gifts and roses he could have gotten you. Your heart swelled as you looked at him, so grateful that everything in the world aligned for him to meet you in that way. The word ‘destiny’ was dancing around in your mind.

“Action!” You heard someone call and then reality was hidden for the next moments and you were back playing a part.

His lips found yours immediately, just as passionate as before if not even more, and your hands grabbed at him, anything to get him closer to you.

One of his hands pushed the door to the bedroom open as the other sneaked around your waist and you stumbled into the room, lips never leaving another.

“Jump,” Rudy or rather JJ instructed you and you locked your legs around his hips as he grabbed your thighs. Goose-bumps erected on your skin as you felt his touch on the back of your bare legs.

The both of you were already breathing hard, as you couldn’t keep away from each other long enough to catch your breath. It was like your bodies were melting into each other, always closer.

At last his lips left yours and you almost whimpered at the loss of contact but he found a new home on your jaw and neck as he pressed you against the walls of the wooden cabin. Your hand locked around his neck, pulling at the blond waves at the base of it when he met a particular sensitive spot.

“You good?” He asked and you weren’t sure if it was Rudy or JJ asking you. The lines were blurred once again in your mind, but God yes you were more than okay.

“Yes, JJ, yes,” Your voice was slightly hoarse and you thought you heard him moan as he pulled you tighter to him and lifted you off the wall to bring you towards the bed in the middle of the room.

Gently he let you down and hovered over you for a second, admiring your flushed cheeks and red swollen lips. He pecked your lips sweetly over and over and you pulled him in-between your legs, wanting him as close to you as possible. Your breath hitched when he discarded his shirt and you were met with the bare skin of his torso. Your eyes admired every valley and hill of his muscles and soon your hands followed, carefully touching the soft and strong grooves of his abdomen.

A sharp breath escaped him as your cold fingers met his stomach and he leaned back down, reattaching his lips to yours. His right hand found its way to your waist where your shirt had ridden up slightly and you gasped at the contact. His hand wandered to the small of your back, pushing slightly, a signal for you to sit up.

You pushed into him further, your chest pressed to his and he was fingering the hem of your shirt.

“May I?” He inquired kindly and stopped his actions to take a moment to look at you. His brows were drown together as his gaze met yours and you instinctively reached out your fingers to caress the worry of his face. You nodded willingly before you pulled him back into a short kiss and then he stripped off your shirt.

Your head hit the pillows once again and you felt his wet lips on your stomach seconds after. You were only in your bikini top and a pair of shorts now and you tried hard to blend the other people in the room out. Rudy was making a fantastic job of distracting you on that part.

You felt your heartbeat quicken, felt your breath going faster and you knew that this wasn’t anything you could tell your body to do. This was a genuine reaction to this wonderful boy on top of you.

Your whole body felt like it was on fire and drowning in ice-cold water like-wise. You couldn’t remember the last time somebody made you feel like that. The thought that this wasn’t actually real was pressed to the very corners of your mind as you stared into Rudy eyes, his shirtless form hovering above you. God, he was gorgeous. When he looked at you like that and touched your bare skin with his slightly calloused warm hands, it was too easy to forget all the cameras and people around you. But all this was just in your head and you were playing your part just as he did. How you wished in that moment it would be true.

He leaned down further, one hand on your waist drawing lazy circles there and the other one holding him up to not crush you. His lips wandered from your cleavage up your throat to the sweet spot under your ear. Your legs locked around his hips and pulled him closer, his groin meeting the spot between your thighs and you gasped at the sudden sensation, pulling his hair where your hands were entangled.

“Can I take your top off?” He whispered only for you to hear and goosebumps were flashing on your skin at the soft vibrato of his voice.

“Yeah,” You breathed out and arched your back to give him access to the knot between your shoulder blades.

His hand was resting there for a couple seconds without moving and you grew concerned and pulled back to look at his face.

“Are you sure you wanna do this?” He was genuinely trying to make sure you were comfortable with the scene and your exposed body. Nobody in the world could’ve made you feel more secure in this decision than him.

“I would do everything with you,” You whispered just loud enough for the microphones to pick up. You weren’t talking to JJ in that second, you were talking to Rudy. The flashing spark in his eyes and the easy smile returning to his lips told you he knew that as well.

He pulled you up against him and sat up with you straddling him, so your back was turned to the cameras. You gasped surprised at the sudden change of position but it didn’t escape you that he moved you like that so your bare breasts wouldn’t be seen by anybody but him.

“Thank you,” You let out under your breath just for him to hear. You looked at him with so much adoration in that moment and couldn’t help but let your heart fall for him just a bit more.

His eyes moved over your face, just like one of his hands, as if he tried to memorise every plain and freckle on it. You leaned back down to connect your lips and felt an enticing shiver down your spine as his calloused hand opened the knot between your shoulder blades and moved up your spinal column to your neck to remove the top from your upper body.

You welcomed the sudden cold on your bare skin, everything was too hot in that second. But as soon as Rudy pressed his own chest to yours, creating friction on your nipples, it felt like lava was flowing through your veins.

“God, you’re so beautiful,” He said between kisses and one of his hands wandered to your ribcage just below the soft skin of your breast, slowly caressing the skin there.

Your emotions were running high and so was your heart at his touch and his words. With your eyes closed you could pretend that he belonged just to you and nobody else was in the room. Just him and you.

You started grinding on his hips involuntarily your body taking matters into its own hand and not listening to your mind anymore. You gasped when Rudy took one of your breasts into his way bigger hand.

“I need you closer,” He groaned and pressed his hands to the small of your back and your neck before he lay you down again, his chest pressed to yours so close, not allowing anyone to take a look at you.

His hand wandered down to your shorts and he looked down at you questioningly before you nodded and he removed another article of clothing. He removed his own shorts quickly afterwards leaving both of you only in your underwear.

Before it could go any further however he grabbed a blanket lying around on the bed and covered both of you from the waist down and then pretended to pull your last clothes off as well.

“I’m gonna fuck you now, ok?” He groaned in your ear and you could feel his wicked smile pressed to your skin as he told you so.

Holding your eyes locked to his he gave you one last sweet kiss and waited for your consent, which you gave, before he pretended to enter you.

You fake gasped as his hips bucked against yours and your fingers dig into his back as you held him close, chest to chest.

Even though this was all just pretend you couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like to actually share this intimacy with Rudy. What he would feel like inside of you. What he would to you and with you when no one else was around. The thought alone made you wet and your nipples harden.

His head rested in the crook of your neck as he moved against you and breathed hard, occasionally leaving wet sloppy kisses on your too hot skin.

“Fuck, JJ!” You fake moaned and locked your feet around his tight ass as you pulled him closer.

Rudy picked up in pace, you could feel his member even through the hard protective underwear he had to wear for scenes like that. And it drove you absolutely crazy. He through his head back, breaths coming in gasps as his hips grinded into yours.

You wanted him so bad that you felt your insides twisting and knees buckle. Your mind was filled to the brim with thoughts of him: his bright blue eyes and how they crinkled at the corners when he laughed, his brilliant smile with his adorable too sharp teeth, his sinful lips that drove you crazy, his strong body the shone in the late afternoon sun like a god’s. It was only him, him, him.

“Cut!” You heard Jonas scream and the magic disappeared like somebody had hit you with a baseball bat right in the stomach. You could’ve killed him right there and then.

Rudy hovered above you unmoving, still shielding you from the views of everybody else in the room and grabbed a shirt, JJ’s shirt, for you to cover up.

“Are you okay?” He asked once again as soon as the shirt was over your head.

“Yeah,” You smiled at him thankfully, “Are you okay?”

“I am,” He laughed at your sweet question and pecked your forehead before pulling away from you so the both of you sat up in the bed.

Your pulse was still a bit too fast as you faced the team surrounding you.

“Okay, that was wonderful. You two did great. Are you both comfortable?” Jonas asked and you nodded immediately. You were a bit too comfortable actually.

“I think, we’re gonna shoot this scene a couple more times, just to get some different angles and then just JJ and Y/C/N sleeping afterwards and you’re done for today,” Valerie mused and looked between the both of you and to Jonas. You all agreed and then the ordeal started all over again.

It didn’t get any easier to entangle your thoughts of JJ from your thoughts of Rudy however, no matter how often you did the scene.

You were always just as enchanted by him as the first time. His skin on yours, his eyes, his lips, all this sent you right into an abyss of feelings and emotions where no return would be possible.

You had always been good at differentiating between reality and fiction but right now you weren’t so sure if there was anything to keep apart. Because the way Rudy looked at you in-between scenes and during filming… it was the exact same passion and kindness in his eyes.

Tags: @lovelymaybankk @sspidermanss @1d5sosddl @arthiriticcricket @teamnick @lieswithoutfairytales

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youmustbestrongernow · 3 years

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ok this is pretty rough but i just felt like posting something, it’s been too long. also this is just what i’m longing for today, lazy summer evenings just messing about in the park with friends, and it still being light out, so that’s what this is

David felt on top of the world. He'd won. Every single match. Sure he was in pain and exhausted, but he also felt like he could run miles, fight some more, take over the world. He loved summer, it had always been his favourite time of year, but this summer was special. This summer he felt more like himself than he'd ever felt before. He felt right. He felt strong and powerful. He felt unstoppable. This summer was never going to end, because when August rolled around he would be going to school with his friends. He was going to school as himself and no one was going to question it. Just as it should be.

He skipped along hand in hand with Matteo who seemed to have caught some of his energy. He was bouncing too, chattering away, whooping and cheering. The other boys were just as energetic, going over details of the fights, reenacting the best bits as they all descended on the park. It was deserted, due to the late hour, but David was wide awake. they all collapsed by the water and gratefully took the beers Abdi handed out.

"Quite the display there," Carlos said, clinking his bottle against David's.

"The fight?" David asked, knowing how well he'd done, how impressive it must've looked. Matteo had already told him so.

"The kiss," Abdi clarified.

David just laughed, it had been a hell of a kiss. He wasn't one for such dramatic displays of affection, but he'd won and Matteo was looking at him so proudly, with so much love and adoration in his eyes, what could David do except jump out of the ring and kiss him senseless? He kissed him again now for good measure, causing the other boys to whistle and cheer.

"So you two finally sorted yourselves out then?" Carlos asked, genuinely excited about this new development.

Not that it was new, this had been inevitable for years now, it was just David was more comfortable with himself than he'd ever been before. But he'd also realised there was no right way to do this, there were no rules, they would figure this out together. What mattered was what they meant to each other, and that was everything. And Matteo too, right now he seemed to accept that David wasn't going anywhere, that he deserved his love. David knew that would change, there would be days when he wouldn't believe it, but David was ready, he would convince him.

"Yep," he said simply, they didn't need to know anymore than that. He didn't need to justify the speed at which they moved.

"Nice," Jonas said, high fiving him.

David just grinned, so content.

Matteo shuffled where he was still laid against him. He pulled a little baggy out of his pocket and started rolling a joint.

David tangled his fingers in Matteo's hair, pulling it tight and tilting his face up to look at him.

"What's that?" David said pleasantly, his tone mostly teasing.

"You know what it is," Matteo mumbled.

He did. He hadn't known Matteo smoked weed, but at the same time it didn't surprise him. Years ago it would've bothered him, that Matteo had these things that David didn't partake in, but he found he didn't mind. Matteo was his own person and as long as he was ok, David was happy.

"Did you ask permission?" Carlos asked.

David rolled his eyes and huffed.

"Shut up Carlos," he muttered.

But he realised Carlos was serious. Which was stupid, Matteo didn't have to ask his permission to do anything. He told them all as much.

"Sure dude," Abdi said.

"Ok but can I?" Matteo asked, destroying his argument.

"Matteo!"

"What?" he asked innocently, putting the joint to his lips and lighting it.

"I'm not bossy. I'm not," David insisted.

Jonas just nodded.

"I'm not bossy!"

"You kinda are though," Abdi said.

If David wasn't so comfortable with Matteo in his lap he would have tackled him.

"He's not," Matteo said quietly. "Well he is, but not when it matters, he's stubborn sure-"

"Hey!"

"He's super stubborn, but in a good way, he always encourages me to speak up, he never lets me get overwhelmed by my doubts and stuff. I feel so brave when I'm around him.

"Fuck Matteo," David whispered, shuffling back so Matteo's head was resting on his stomach and he could look at him properly.

He watched him continue to smoke, watched his face in the soft glow of the late summer twilight. Watched as Matteo's edges started to soften a little and his eyes became a little glazed. He watched the smoke pass his lips as he exhaled. David he was mesmerised. Matteo just smiled softly at him. David had never seen him like this, serene, it was beautiful. He offered the joint to David but he shook his head. He didn't want to smoke, he wanted to kiss him. He told him so and Matteo just continued to smile. Slowly he got up from where he was laying and crawled over David. David let his hands drift to Matteo's waist to steady him. But Matteo didn't kiss him. No, he took another hit, but this time he didn't exhale, he gently cupped David's face and leant in. He waited. David realised what was happening and nodded. When Matteo’s lips were millimetres from his own, he parted them and breathed in the smoke.

It should have been the hottest thing they'd ever done. But of course he had to spoil it. He coughed and spluttered in Matteo's face and all the boys laughed at him.

Matteo ignored them. He was determined to do it right.

"Breathe in slowly, as I'm breathing out, don't try, just relax," he said, voice low and quiet. "Just breathe and relax," he repeated.

David took a breathe, then another, watching Matteo inhale again. This time he was ready, this time he matched Matteo, not quite in sync like they usually were, but out of step. He breathed in the smoke and when his lungs burnt, he didn't panic, he just let it go again. He smiled at Matteo in the hazy light. Fucking hell he was cute. David didn't care about the smoke, he wanted a proper kiss, so he pulled Matteo against him properly. There was no resistance, Matteo just melted into him, kissing him back lazily. This was nice, he'd never really kissed Matteo like this, slowly like that. he liked it. he kissed him again and again. then He took another hit. Matteo seemed to like it too, his eyes were dark and heavy.

Jonas just huffed and snatched the joint from Matteo. Which was fair enough. Neither of them cared about it anymore.

Matteo just pushed David down and relaxed into him, never breaking the kiss. David revelled in it, being kissed so freely by Matteo. Yes, this summer really was the best one yet.

#i almost change my mind and posted a different scene #i couldn't decide #but this one was my mood and i love it #man i've missed these boys #childhood au #davenzi snippets

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inqorporeal · 3 years

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Future Tense

It was rare, Theron mused, that things were so quiet that they had a moment to relax like this. The cantina was bustling, and all of the advisors and primary staff had been able to justify taking the evening off. Theron got a lot of shit for being a workaholic, and even now he could feel the niggling itch of a puzzle left unsolved. But it could wait. For the moment, there were more important things to worry about.

Sitting in the booth beside him, the Commander cradled their drink between their hands and leaned a little more into Theron's space, seeking permission.

It was a… weird dynamic between them. The Commander was Imperial, Theron was a Republic spy. Feelings should never have developed between them; but what had begun as an uneasy alliance had blossomed into a mutual respect and even admiration. By the time Theron ran into them on their way to rescue him from the Revanites, well….

You couldn't fake that look of relief in a person's eyes. They had stood up for him, defended him, and hadn't agreed with Lana about her willful negligence which had led to Theron's capture. Seven years later and he was still awed that anyone had successfully extracted an apology, however reluctant, from a Sith Lord on his behalf.

When they'd first begun their association chasing rumours of Revanites, Theron had been worried that the two Imperials might try to extract Republic secrets from him; neither had asked more than he was willing to offer, and even though he'd felt incredibly lonely during that time, he had also felt at ease. Nobody was leaning over his shoulder for once Marcus, nor prying into his downtime activities Jonas, and the people he had to work with had encouraged him to put the datapad down in the evenings to share a drink or two and talk shit about members of the Dark Council. Theron had felt free enough to dump some of his (non-classified) dirt on certain Senators, to the amused delight of his partners in conspiracy-routing.

So when the Commander had asked about Satele, Theron may have spilled a bit of long-held bitterness. It wasn't really fair of him -- Satele wouldn't have wanted to let Darth Marr know Theron might be leverage on her (he would be; her distance in his youth aside, Satele did care). But… he'd been tired. The painkillers had been wearing off. Maintaining a semblance of professional decorum during that meeting had consumed his remaining energy, and his patience had largely taken a leave of absence.

The Commander -- his ally, swiftly sliding into territory that could have tentatively been friendship -- had expressed concern, support, bantered lightly and teased him, drawing his mind away from the pressing issues for a precious moment. When they'd kissed him, it had felt real, like Theron was appreciated and cared for, like they had seen the worst sides of him and found the whole package worth the risk.

They had been risking everything, stealing private moments when and where they could on Yavin IV, surrounded by military detachments from both sides who clearly didn't trust each other. If anyone who had cared had caught them together, Theron would have lost his job and possibly been brought up for an official inquiry; who knew what the Commander had risked. Knowing the Sith, probably interrogation and/or death.

Just for him, Theron, a Jedi washout, an intelligence analyst with no life outside his work and a long list of past relationships that had never survived his career for more than a couple of months. The knowledge had shaken him to his core then, and it still did now: that someone had looked at Theron and found him worth risking death for.

Of course it could have been a ruse, but the looks Lana had been giving them said otherwise. She pretended not to see anything and didn't utter even one word of teasing. If Marr and Satele found out about them, it wouldn't be from her.

Saying goodbye had been unexpectedly painful. In truth, Theron had allowed things to continue because he hadn't believed they would live long enough to see the end of it. So, it seemed, had the Commander. Who needs words? they'd whispered, and kissed him, soft and tender, gloved fingers weaving into his hair and pulling him close. Theron had started to speak, to say how sorry he was, and they'd pressed a fingertip to his lips, with a smile so gentle and sorrowful it damn near broke his heart. Message received: don't apologise for the inevitable.

Theron had spent a year denying that it still ate at him, denying that he thought of them every day, denying that the reason he'd stopped joining Jonas for nights out that ended with casual hook-ups had less to do with working hard to re-prove his loyalty and more to do with the fact that a certain Imperial loyalist had claimed Theron's heart and he didn't want a replacement. Hearing about what had happened to Marr's fleet, though, had blasted that denial right out of the sky. Theron had got back in touch with Lana, asking what happened; maybe she'd actually liked him, or maybe she'd just been in shock, but she gave him straight answers instead of telling him where to get off, and then wrapped it up with, They're not dead, Theron. I can feel them, still. I'll be in touch.

Now he knew why the Commander had been pissed enough to force Lana to apologise to him a year earlier. The thought of the Commander imprisoned somewhere while everyone assumed they were dead nearly destroyed Theron. He'd thrown out all the alcohol in his Coruscant apartment so he wouldn't give into the temptation, and the feeling of time being wasted on the comparative minutiae of his actual job scratched and scraped at the back of his brain. Jonas, perceptive bastard that he is, had noticed; he'd suggested burning off Theron's restlessness with a night out and got snapped at for his trouble.

Theron had -- eventually -- apologised for that, but not before Lana had commed him on the secret, massively encrypted frequency he'd devised. Theron had sent his apology to Jonas taped to the only bottle of booze he'd kept, the unopened bottle of Corellian brandy Jonas had given him to celebrate Theron's most recent promotion.

He had no illusions that he'd effectively sunk his fifteen-year career in the SIS when he'd packed up his essentials and bought a shuttle ticket to Nar Shaddaa under a pseudonym, using credits from one of his other pseudonymic accounts. It wasn't like his work mattered anymore, anyway. In the last few months since Zakuul's Eternal Fleet had come out of nowhere and effectively annexed the Republic, their department heads had played at pretending everything was fine and normal, while all signs pointed to the contrary. According to Lana, the Empire was in much the same state.

Theron had long since grown tired of sitting on his hands instead of actually doing something. He never had dealt with periods of inactivity well.

And now… now he sat in a cantina surrounded by people he by rights should never have become friends with, with his arm openly around the shoulders of a certain ex-Imperial whose faith and loyalty had been well and truly shattered. They'd looked terrible when Theron had first seen them upon his arrival at Odessen: too thin, too exhausted, moving like everything hurt.

It hadn't prevented them from hugging him tightly -- right there in front of everyone -- and murmuring, "You're a sight for sore eyes," the same greeting they had offered on Ziost six years earlier. The feelings were still there, stronger than ever, and Theron had accepted the knowledge that this was his life now. Their lives, now.

The Commander was doing better since Valkorion had taken a cryptic leave of absence; better appetite, less prone to waking up in the middle of the night cursing out someone Theron couldn't throw out of the room, able to focus on work without drifting off to glare at the corner of the room every few minutes. Force only knew how much hassle the creepy Sith ghost had been giving them. It was a relief to Theron, as well -- both of them had been uneasy about the idea of the Sith Emperor watching them in the privacy of their quarters.

"What do you plan to do?" Theron found himself asking. "When this is all over and things go back to normal, I mean," he added when everyone at the table looked at him.

The Commander frowned into their drink. "I'm not sure 'normal' is ever going to happen," they answered. “Too much has changed in the galaxy. Everyone has been forced to adjust and adapt."

Theron gestured to the cheerful crowd beyond the relative privacy of their table. "I mean… the Alliance. Are we all going to have to just… go home?"

The Commander looked thoughtful, then glanced at Lana. "In your professional estimation--"

"Hah," Lana snorted, but she was smiling.

"Shush, you. In your estimation, how many friendships and romantic entanglements have occurred since the Alliance established itself?"

"On Odessen?"

"Everywhere we have operations."

The Sith frowned for a moment. "Hundreds. Thousands."

"Mmhmm, and in your estimation, how many of those would be considered cross-faction?"

Theron could see where this was going but he remained quiet -- his specialty was external intelligence; Lana's was internal.

"Roughly two-thirds, if we're considering smugglers, pirates, and bounty hunters their own faction."

The Commander looked back out at the bar. "Infrastructure is nothing without the people who make it tick, and those little alliances mean something. Say we win. Say we beat Valkorion at his own game. Do you really think people will happily give up everything they've built over the last few years and go back to what we were doing before? No. The defection rate would be tremendous. We're all here because the people we wanted to trust in sat back and did nothing, chose to use the opportunity to enrich themselves politically rather than combining their strength and fighting back." They turned their glass on the table, watching the water ring smear. "I'm not going back. I can't. I can't believe in that anymore. And if there are others who also don't want to go back…? Then we'll figure something out together."

Theron looked over at Lana, who met his eyes and shook her head. She couldn't go back, either. "Then maybe we should start thinking about future organisation," she ventured. "I know you don't want to remain in control forever--"

The Commander scoffed and leaned further into Theron's side. "I'm only the Commander because you pushed for it. Our Zakuul allies want me to sit on the Eternal Throne. I can guess why -- they think I'm Valkorion's next incarnation -- and I don't want that. Zakuul can figure its own shit out. But if we settle anywhere else, either the Republic, the Empire, or both will try to annex us. They already dislike the concept of a third power existing in the galaxy, and let's be real: Odessen isn't as secret as we wish it was. We should already be looking for a backup base; we might as well look for something that can be more permanent. I’m not just giving this up. Not again."

They hesitated, and glanced at Theron, something guilty in their eyes. Before they could apologise for making a choice without talking to him first, Theron pressed his temple against theirs. "Wherever we go, you can count on me to be there too."

#just swtor things #I have a beef with how the Alliance and the expanded story were handled #Theron x Commander because the dynamic is fun #Imperial Commander because that dynamic is also a lot of fun #wish the game had gone more into how all this shit is affecting the people caught up in it

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myhiraeth · 2 years

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@starlightfreed sent: everyone who isn’t us is an enemy. // more cleo for lou pls GoT ask meme || accepting !!

"I mean... yes and no. It's more complicated than that." He hates himself that Stephen pops into his mind immediately. His brother wasn't an enemy, not really. He was complacent, sure, but he wasn't an enemy. Neither was Megan. If Jonas were to get mortally wounded and Lou were to take his boyfriend to his siblings, they'd help him. Their innate goodness wouldn't allow them to let Jonas die no matter who he was in his life.

But they did hold up a system that was killing it's own people. Did that alone make them the enemy? Was what they didn't stop more important than what they did do? How did you weigh those two things? He realized he'd paused with his fingers threaded through her hair and resumed the braid he'd offered to do with a deceptively careless shrug, his fingers' twisting her hair into a skilled , tight braid. "Sometimes things aren't as easy as 'ally' and 'enemy'."

#starlightfreed #louis warren. / int. / cleo. / starlightfreed

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kissjane · 4 years

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JUST A HOOKUP / Short fic

#17 from this prompt list

Which one of you anons wanted David pinning Matteo to the wall?

“I think I’m in love with you.”

It’s been like this forever. They go out together, and after a few beers, David disappears amongst the masses on the dance floor, while Matteo hides away in the darkest corner of the room, trying to watch David without being creepy. It lasts until somebody inevitably approaches David, and David smiles widely at whoever it is, his eyes sparkly. They then dance together for a while – a few minutes, an hour – it doesn’t matter, because Matteo knows the end game. Week after week David leaves the dance floor with somebody pretty and confident and experienced – exactly like Matteo isn’t – and comes back with his hair mussed, his clothes disarranged, his eyes flushed and his lips swollen and red. And then they go home, and David will ask Matteo if he had a good time, and Matteo will say yes, and David will ask him if he will dance with David next week, and Matteo will shrug, and ask David if he had fun, and David will wink. And when they reach the flat share – David always walks Matteo home, never the other way around – they will bump fists and with a cheery wave and a “Good night” David will be off, leaving Matteo to suffer in silence. Matteo will lay awake for hours thinking about what David did this time in the bathroom, or against the wall, or in the broom closet, or wherever he took this week’s hook up.

Matteo is well used to the pattern by now, and he has also learned to ignore Jonas, who will at some point bring him a beer, and lean against the wall next to him, and sigh deeply.

“I know I say this every fucking time, bro, but just tell him already. Or stay home next time. You don’t enjoy parties, and even you are not masochistic enough to torture yourself like this every fucking week.”

Matteo accepts the beer with a small nod, but otherwise ignores Jonas. He delivers some variation to this general spiel every week, anyway. He should know by now Matteo won’t listen.

But apparently, Jonas has had enough of their ritual, because suddenly Abdi and Carlos show up, and the three of them force Matteo to move. They push and pull, and he is no match against the three of them, so he lets them maneuver him to the dancefloor, right next to David. He can absolutely refuse to play along, though, so when they urge him in low voices to dance, he just stands there, not moving, rooted to the ground.

But David has other ideas, it seems.

“Matteo!”, he exclaims giddily. “Finally you have come to dance with me!”

And he grabs Matteo by the waist and pulls him against his body, undulating in cadence with the heavy beat that pulsates through the club.

Matteo knows he needs to get away from this, before his body gets ideas about being this close to David, but David is strong, and he doesn’t let go. All Matteo can do is will himself to remain calm, to not react to the way David is pushing his hips against Matteo’s, or the way he tangles his hand in Matteo’s hair.

He desperately tries to signal Jonas to save him before he embarrasses himself, but the traitor just shrugs, and ignores Matteo’s pleading eyes.

So he keeps reciting irregular Spanish verbs in his head, to keep his attention away from the way David has turned Matteo around in his arms, and is now full-on grinding against Matteo’s ass, his hands low on Matteo’s hipbones. If Jonas thought watching David from the corner was torture, he doesn’t know how to describe this. This is so much worse. The only remotely positive part about this is that nobody else comes up to David, and David doesn’t vanish with a stranger.

Matteo loses track of time, trying not to concentrate on David’s body, his fingers on Matteo’s skin, his breath in his ear as he whispers something Matteo doesn’t quite understand.

“What?”, he stupidly says, turning his head slightly, and then regretting it when he realizes how close David’s face is, how dark his eyes.

David stares for a long heartbeat at Matteo, and then tugs at his hand. His lips form some words, and Matteo thinks David is asking him to come along, so he does. He will do whatever David wants. There’s nothing new there.

And then, before Matteo’s brain has had time to catch up, David has pushed him against the wall, and has pressed his full length against Matteo, and is kissing him with abandon.

Matteo’s rational thoughts short-circuit, and he kisses back, immediately hot and bothered, opening his mouth for David, and spreading his legs when David moves one knee in between them, and pushes against Matteo firmly. Matteo cannot keep himself from reacting any longer, and he feels himself harden. He knows David must be able to feel it, but David doesn’t recoil in disgust, but instead presses even closer, as if he wants to crawl inside Matteo.

Matteo has no idea how long they are kissing, but when David pulls back and groans Matteo’s name, suddenly his brain starts functioning again.

David looks exactly like all those times he came back from some make-out session – and Matteo’s heart breaks. With a surge of strength he didn’t know he possessed, he pushes David away, and when David, surprised by Matteo’s actions, stumbles backwards, Matteo bolts.

He runs as quickly as he can, knowing David is faster, but hoping David will just go back to the dancefloor.

But his hope is proven idle, when he hears David call out his name, and his footsteps approaching.

Panting, breathless, both from the sprint and from the kiss, Matteo stops and waits for David to catch up.

“What was that about?”, David demands, not out of breath at all. “Why did you take off like that?”

Matteo doesn’t know how to feel. He is embarrassed about his reaction to David, and suddenly he feels nothing but anger – at David, for kissing him like that, at Jonas, for putting Matteo in this situation, and mostly at himself, for being in love with his friend, who he knows is out of reach.

So in his anguish, he lashes out.

“Why wouldn’t I? You got your heavy petting for the week. We always leave after you got some, so why would this week be any different?”

And David’s eyes narrow at Matteo’s cynical words, and his face hardens. Slowly, but deliberately, he steps closer towards Matteo, and Matteo helplessly retreats, until he feels a wall in his back, and David closes him in with two arms next to his shoulders.

“Who says I was done with this week’s heavy petting?”, he sneers, emphasizing the words, and he presses his lips to Matteo’s again, hard and bruising. And Matteo, at first, reacts – opens his mouth, pushes his hips towards David, arches his back to rest his head against the wall – but then it all becomes too much and with a sob, he pushes against David’s chest.

“Stop,” he cries, “stop, stop, David, stop, please…”

David, who at first moved his lips towards Matteo’s neck to suck at the tender skin there, suddenly stops, and his whole demeanor changes. His face turns worried, his hands cradle Matteo’s face with care, and his voice is soft when he speaks.

“Sorry… sorry, Matteo… I shouldn’t have… But I just wanted you so badly…”

Matteo is crying now, tears and snot running over his face, and David pulls him into a hug, and at first, Matteo wants to step back, but then he gives in to the familiar comfort, and leans his head on David’s shoulder. They stay like that for what feels like an eternity, and when the sobs stop racking through Matteo’s body, David speaks again.

“I am so, so sorry, Matteo… Please, forgive me… I won’t ever try anything like that again. I know it’s no excuse, but I just wanted to kiss you so much, and I thought you were into it too…”

“I was,” Matteo whispers, vulnerable, but deciding he needs to be honest. He might lose his friend, but after what happened just now, he doesn’t know if they can ever be the same unless he finally confesses.

“I was, David, but I – I don’t wanna be one of your dirty hookups…”

David blusters at Matteo’s words, ready to defend himself.

“There is nothing wrong with hooking up with people, Matteo!”, he retorts, sounding upset. “You’re – it’s like you’re implying I’m acting like some sort of monster. It’s not dirty. I don’t take advantage of them, or whatever you might think!”

Matteo shakes his head violently.

“No… No, that’s not it. It’s just that – Well, I don’t know about those others, but I – I don’t want that – I don’t want just some grinding against a wall…”

David immediately sounds remorseful again.

“Yeah, I realize that now. I should have asked permission first, Matteo, I’m sorry. I just… I thought…”

He seems at a loss for words, and Matteo holds on to this strange mix of vulnerability and courage coursing through him.

“I know. And you were right… I mean, I was into it, I guess… I just – I – It would kill me to do this with you now and then watch you do it with somebody else again next week. I hate watching you with other people.”

David remains very still, and Matteo fears he has ruined their friendship.

“Why – why?”, he finally asks, on a trembling breath.

“Because I – I think I am in love with you,” Matteo says, equally unsteady, his voice so low he is not sure David can hear him.

Neither of them moves, or speaks, and it seems like time stopped, until a car honks somewhere in the distance, and they both are shaken out of their turmoil thoughts.

“Do you know why I hook up with somebody else every time we go out?”, David suddenly says, his voice almost loud in the silent night.

Matteo shakes his head, unsure where this is going, wondering if David hasn’t heard his confession, or is just ignoring it.

“Because I didn’t think the person I really want to kiss wanted me.”

Matteo swallows, and tries to say something, but no sound comes out.

“But now… Now I think maybe he does.”

Matteo stares at David, and David stares back.

“Matteo… If I promise it’s not just a hookup, if I promise I will kiss you again next time, and the next, and every day in between… If I promise I will never even look at anybody else… Will you please let me kiss you again?”

Matteo cannot do anything but nod dumbly. But when David smiles, and steps closer, and backs Matteo against the wall for the third time, he feels his heart speed up and he closes his eyes. Maybe – just maybe, this is how it’ll be forever, from now on.

#I write things #Davenzi #all the davenzi shipping anons #50 cliché prompts

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