// personal, therapy mention, positive !!!!

good thing:

i am exhausted and queasy after therapy but i watched a clip from iw and that feels like a win.

mr house never being able to replicate his courier six because they never let him scan them, so all he has are a few shoddy recordings he took to recreate the courier from. his replicas of courier six are flawed: none are as perceptive, resourceful and proactive. they aren't good at out-of-the-box thinking or improvising. their problemsolving, diplomacy skills and technological innovation ideas fall short of the original and are just another disappointment every time. they end up hollow shells like jane, marilyn and victor. letting new vegas go, ruin itself in pursuit of recreating his perfect right hand again, hope for another fruitful partnership and bright future of the mojave like they did before is so delicious it makes me sick actually send tweet ✌

>.<

tbh I know we’re all weird girls here and I love it but on average I have at least one interaction with my roommates per day that is weirder than anything I ever post on here

the nice thing about being back on my ketamine treatments is that I can bargain with myself re: takeout by being like "OH NO, GETTING INDIAN CURRY IS A MEDICAL NECESSITY..."

it cleans out your sinuses real nice, which is helpful before taking a medication nasally lmao.

anyway, I guess what I'm saying is that chicken makhani should be covered by my health insurance.

one day i will properly compare dee made a smut film and ptsdee and the differences in the way they handle their very similar subject material but i have shit to do early tomorrow morning so. for now.

do you ever think about how RCG-written episodes, no matter how bad (both character morality-wise and writing-wise) they get, will always have a degree of humanity to them. like. 11x04 has dee doing something that is So incredibly wrong and horrible to dennis. but the reactions to it don't match its intensity. 12x07 again has dee doing something absolutely fucking deranged, and the gang tells her how fucked up it was. there's actually an acknowledgement both from her and from the others that what she did was awful, but her motivation, charlie, dennis, frank and mac's motivations throughout the episode make sense. dee's insecurity is the root of it, she can't handle being someone's "rock bottom", and she needs to prove that it can get worse. 11x04 dee just decides she's going to be a bastard and tell everyone that dennis was raped at 14. we don't know why she does this, and she really has no reason to, other than to be an asshole.

Don't Leave Me Until I Find My Way Back to You

.

You’d think that with all this bike riding and lifting children off the floor that I’d be even more hungry, but no; I have the appetite of a little tiny bird???? The fuck

I don’t like it

i literally can't even look at the clothes that i was wearing for the last two (and even one) years. like first of all they dont fit and are stretched all to hell as well from being worn anyways but damn!!!! even looking at them just takes me back and makes me feel sick to my stomach and i literally want to puke it's so visceral.

hi i xalled in sixk from work i will either be incredibly active or disapear for three days

Haha, no dude, it's uuuuuuuh, totally normal to treat people's personal creations like a corporate franchise, nah nah, it's not even a little weird that the only way you interact with fandom is by mindlessly consuming content and reposting other people's work, I'm sure it's totally fine to just disregard the creator's wishes as long as you get to have your 2 minutes of fun with "your" new blorbos before your criminally short attention span moves onto the next thing for you to mindlessly consume, yeah, haha, I'm sure framing the creator's struggle to keep control of their work as a threat to your future ability to continue to consume content isn't totally self-centered or tone-deaf. No yeah man, haha, totally normal

I downloaded an app that I think is meant to be used for like, detailed food tracking or something, but I instead really just wanted something with this format (color coded calendar days) so I could put in one single simple entry a day to kind of rate my day overall (based on physical health symptoms).. which..... looking back over it for the new year since when I first started tracking.. 9 "good" days in about 9 months, so roughly one good day a month LOL...

absolute waffle going on in the tags.

ignore (or read if you're that interested).

i just wanna speak but have no one to speak too so my tumblr tags are basically just nothing but my internal thoughts needing to come out.

sorry.

love to you all. x

Yellow rose. Sweetbrier. Purple hyacinth.

hey. how we doin fam? everybody got their emotional support whiskey? box of tissues? flashbacks from the queer/cas-baiting-leading-up-to-the-spn-finale PTSD? yeah?