#e and back to normal again
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sorry it took me ages to get around to this (shakes fist at life in general) but here i am with some trademarks of your art!! obviously i think of your extremely feral scrunkly lady noire as a trademark but you already know how much i love her heeheehee!!
i think what makes her feel so scrunkly though is the way you use lines - your lineart is both clean and sketchy at the same time, like every line feels deliberate and as though it's been put down very carefully to create a specific effect, but it's also full of energy and a life of its own! like the lines have just jumped from pen to page and it's so impressive that you can make your lineart feel carefully crafted, effortless, and wayward all at the same time!!
however having just rambled about lines you also do amazing lineless work!!! i really love your style when you use blocks of colours but because you choose the tones so carefully and place them so precisely it doesn't feel blocky! it feels smooth and natural and effortlessly minimalist despite requiring a lot of talent!! hmm...maybe your trademark is how effortless your art feels despite using complex techniques and obviously requiring a lot of careful thought? because that's definitely something i notice regardless of style!!
another big characteristic of your art for me is Fashion - not only are you able to put incredible looks together, but your art style really reminds me of the sketches fashion designers make!! (i think i mentioned this before and you said you wanted to be a fashion designer as a kid so it makes sense!!)
also in terms of specific features - a mask that looks like two parts that *just* meet in the middle is definitely one of your trademarks!! also girls with 50s pin up vibes!! oh and That Outfit with the stripey shirt and trousers/skirt with a patch (with big stitches...kind of like your lady noire!! was it inspiration??)
i feel like i could babble on about your art trademarks for a long time because you use lots of different styles and they're all unique to you and have their own individual trademarks!! your art is just very special imo!! *cradles it protectively in my hands*
omg hi cory!!!!! teehee im so happy that so many ppl assosiate lady noire with my art!! (also, do not apologize!!!! *joins you shaking your fist at life*)
AAAAAAA THANK!!!!! lineart is something ive definetely struggled with in the past, so im SO SO SO SO INCREDIBLE HAPPY that it comes over as sketchy but also clean!!! gah cory. you are gonna kill me with all these compliments!!!!! and i love how you describe it as having a life of its own- i usually like using my lineart as more of a ''guide'' as to where im gonna put the colours, then like. a template to fill in i guess??? NOT SURE HOW TO EXPLAIN IT LMAO BUT IM GLAD YOU LIKE IT
AND THANK YOU!!!!!! omg i feel like such an imposter rn lol, i always eyeball stuff HOWEVER it is definetely a Struggle to have stuff not look blocky if you for exampe have two similar in value/darkness colours next to each other so im rlly happy that my art feels smooth and nice!!!! thank you!!!! and !!! AAAA that means a lot!!! its definetely not something that id be able to put my finger on myself but you described it perfectly!! not sure about the careful thought part tho, my brain while drawing is half somewhere entirely else and half like. ah yes. Vibes. No no not like That. YES. hmm. lines. no., Hmmmmmm.. !! you give me too much credit lol <3 but im glad that ive succesfully created the illusion that i in fact do Think about what im drawing
EEEEEeEEEE ty!!! FASHION!!!! fashion has definetely had a huge influence on how and what i draw so it makes sense that thats reflected in my art!! and haha ty, im glad you like all the fits i put together!! :D
and teehee YES i LOVE drawing masks that way!!! and That Outfit!! now that you mention it, YEAH it IS kinda like lady noire!! it wasnt inspo tho! (at least not consciously)! also, its rlly interesting that you said that you get 50's pinup girl vibes from my art!! i dont rlly see it, but it does kinda make sense bc i always loved the vibrant colours and vibes from them!!
WAH THANK YOU!!!!!! cory im cradling YOU gently in my hands
Whats my art trademark?? (ask game!)
#i think its v funny how im putting that copied super normal sounding ask link right after 5 full paragraphs of me saying Stuff as if im don#e and back to normal again#(im not)#anywyas. tags.#ask#ask me anything!#ask game
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I cannot stop thinking about the kiss, yes, but the second kiss? When Laudna admits to thinking she’s a bad person, and Imogen refuted it and Laudna kisses her again before explaining everything that happened with Bor’Dor and Delilah???? What if it was a kiss she took out of fear Imogen would rebuke her for her actions? What if it was a kiss she took because she wasn’t sure she’d get another????
Imogen would never turn her away but what if Laudna truly didn’t comprehend that in the seconds before the second kiss? What if she thought it’d be their last??? What then???
#no. i am not normal about them#imodna#laudna#imogen temult#critical role spoilers#I will be stewing on this for the whole week#I should get back to writing fanfics#I am tempted to post my wips that I may not finish after this#tonight’s episode cured my depression#nothing bad will ever happen again#they kissed in the mf bread aisle#farmers market kiss#like that’s so gay of them and I love it#H O W D O I S L E E P ? ? ?#should I write this lol
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j/on s/ims the type of guy to wait until the very very last second before pausing a tape to sneeze...... like?? he definitely is in denial about needing to sneeze despite it literally being about to happen
#now im imagining his voice slooowly getting breathier and breathier with the occasional hitch between words-#-and then the tape clicks on and off and suddenly hes back to normal (for now)#what if he was about to sneeze and then. tried to turn off the recorder but slipped/missed or wtv and didnt have time to try again#imagine THAT in a recording#then maybe t/im (idk much about him yet tbh) is listening back to the tapes and comes across this one#talks to j/on about it while trying not to laugh#j/on is very grumpily like “yes i know ill have to rerecord it dont REMIND me”#and t/im is like “actually thats pretyy funny you should leave that in”#cue j/on being all “do you have any idea how *disgusting* .... blah blah blah.... MORTIFYING not to mention UNPROFESSIONAL-#“-(indistinct pissed-off rambling)”#t/im is like “ok chill i was joking pleas e”#Sorry that got away frkm me a bit#k talks#t/ma
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Is there a secret for finding and buying clothes that actually make you feel good? Could someone let in on that secret please?
#i haven't really bought clothes in years#and I'm not the same size i was then#and i know I'm never going back to that#I've made a promise to myself that I'm never going to diet again#i fall into disordered eating so fast#I'm proud that for almost 2 years now I've just eaten without any mental gymnastics of calorie counting or portion finagling etc#i do try to consciously add more veggies. and i work to listen to my hungry/full indicators#so im never going back to the weight of my early twenties. never going to happen. and I spend time telling myself thats okay and normal.#then my clothes don't fit.#and when i go to the store i have a hard time finding things that A. i like. B. in my size. C. aren't crazy expensive#and i walk home emptyhanded.#i don't want to spend money on clothes I don't even like.#i feel like Im trapped in a Kobayashi Maru. a no win scenario.#i want to feel cute and comfortable in clothes.#apparently thats asking for a flying horse#e is for echo
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Oh boy it's time time of the year again where due to [redacted] I rethink my entire fucking [redacted] and realize there is no proper outcome in this situation.
#tw vent#like i'm nocturnal by nature and I just can NOT do a daytime schedule#but it's been [redacted]#and honestly I don't know what to do about it or how to go about talking to her about it#I'm on an uncharted island and have no clue what the fuck to do#because even if I fix my sleep schedule it's only a few weeks until it goes right back to it's normal and nocturnal state#and the fucking sorrows and distance of all kinds start over again#in a never ending dharmic cycle that one can not break free from without true levels of suffering#I don't know what the fuck to do and all I know is sadness and suffering delight#vent post#i'd like to cry but even after being on E for a while that's still nearly impossible
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learning that petey could've maybe been a cane because all the canucks org knows to do is fumble baddies instead of fight for them a little, and it puts you in a bit of a mood. naturally
#PETEY TALK TO YOUR UNION! SOMETHING IS FISHY!#wow SO GLAD to hear that they decided to try again with her... but she literally said she wanted to focus on the season and talk contract#decisions AFTER the season ended. which is a totally normally request BTW 👍🏼 and they go ahead and discuss maybe trading him to#FAWKING NORTH CAROLINA.?????? YOU EXPECTED H E R TO GO TO CAROLINA???? get the hell out of my face. im still livid#like y'all don't know your queens good enough and the disrespect is crazy.... i would never.. i'd rather die!#and now he's just going to talk numbers to get everyone off his back because no one respected his wishes. ohhhh i'm sick to my stomach#ebear... mama... i'm sorry you had to be example a. of this phenomena also.
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//Great time to remind everyone IF YOU ARE UNDER THE AGE OF 18, YOU SHOULD BE NOWHERE NEAR HERE. You're only a kid for so long, you get to be an adult forever. MAKE IT LAST. FRIGGIN' WAIT TO ENGAGE IN CONTENT LIKE THIS.
//No one can protect you if you refuse to let them. These games and this fandom and content have 18+ tags on them for a REASON, and it's to PROTECT YOU. You're not cool, you're not edgy, you're not special, you're not grown up for ignoring warning signs that are set there to KEEP YOU FROM HARM, you're just an idiot for exposing yourself to that ON PURPOSE.
#//Someone liked one of my posts#//Who PROUDLY had “Minor!” in their bio#//Blocked them IMMEDIATELY but still.... Wth?#//Sorry if this is harsh but i just know in my heart that if teenage me came across BTD#//I would have loved it !!! it also would have messed me up#//I know this cause it happened already !! i was into MLP in the 2010's and lord knows how tragic THAT fandom was#//i have also ALWAYS been attracted to guro. especially after exposing myself to rotten dot com at a very young age online#//it took me Y E A R S to fix myself and get comfortable in my own skin again#//took me Y E A R S to believe im not a freak for enjoying the things i do#//i understand it and its NOT a black and white detail. its COMPLEX and CONFUSING and needs your understanding#//But teenage me didn't know that. She wasn't aware and couldn't figure it out for a LONG long time.#//and even without the gore and shock sites- the MLP fandom was BOOMING with adults who didnt know how to behave#//That was a whole separate journey for me!!!!#//P L E A S E just live your childhood. enjoy your youth. Strade isn't going anywhere. Come back later when you can really think about-#-W H Y you like these games.#//I am SUPER frustrated.#//Not to trauma dump or anything but this kind of media ISN'T NORMAL TO CONSUME AS A CHILD#//i only got lucky. it was just luck.
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yoooo I remember reading varjak paw as a kid. I honestly don't remember much about it other than his like spinning(?) cat fighting technique (???)
HE SUPER DID HAVE THAT, god, slow time moving circles shadow walking has been stuck in my head literally since elementary school, the VIBES of that whole book were absolutely impeccable
i remember being scared shitless by the Gentleman's pair of black not!cats and just absolutely hit by a truck about the
"I Am Very Well Thank You Please"
'stuffed toys' reveal, the ILLUSTRATIONS just. WHOO. OKAY. i feel absolutely zero compunctions putting this one up there on the "short stories you read that alter your brain chemistry" shelf tbqh
apparently there was a second one, which i didn't know about until i tripped over it at a library book sale and you bet your ass it came home with me, i still haven't read it yet but like. [long string of eyes emojis]
#varjak paw#so like for those of you who did NOT have the experience of picking this book up at a scholastic book fair and getting their shit rocked#it was basically the gritty urban horror-fantasy counterpoint to the warrior cats books#you know the Stranger from the magnus archives? the patron fear-entity of dnd mimics and the uncanny valley et al?#you know that whole thing with the mannequin ringmaster lady who steals people's skins?#y e a h#that uh. features heavily. h e a v i l y. young me was NOT braced.#let me once again stress i bought this at a SCHOLASTIC BOOK FAIR IN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL#but!!! one of the other cool things?#the main character dreams about his great-great-ancestor jalal all the way back in ancient mesopotamia#and jalal teaches him like. cat jutsus#which are all 'normal cat things' just amped up to 11#and there was this whole thing with the illustrations in the real world being this STARK black and white but the illustrations in the dream#were all this gentle sepia sorta color#up until varjak achieves mastery of the skills jalal is teaching him#and only then do we see true black in the dream-illustrations#it was such an atmospheric book and i will die on the hill that it was good and also criminally underrated#answered asks by cwaf
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i keep having tech issues where the solution seems to be to like wait and stare at it and poke at it a little and be annoyed and then it spontaneously resolves itself
#my laptop was only booting into BIOS mode or w/e and giving me a 'no bootable devices' error#i eliminated all possible causes besides a hardware issue but didnt have a small enough screwdriver to open up the back#waited about a week and would repeatedly try to restart it to see if anything changes#(it didnt)#finally borrowed a small enough screwdriver and opened it up only to remember i have no fucking idea what i was doing#poked at the interior parts a little but did nothing that would change anything#booted up the computer again expecting it to go into BIOS as it had been up to 15 minutes prior (so i could get the right errors to search)#my laptop boots up normally with zero issue whatsoever
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IN OTHER NEWS I FINISHED TRANSLATION STATE LAST NIGHT the ending had me sobbing not bc it's sad at all but WAAAAA
#i have not stopped thinking abt qven and reet for a single minute since i started reading#just. seeing a character who experienced an extremely traumatic violation of both eir trust + body find someone who not only respects-#eir boundaries but naturally creates a space for em where e feels safe enough to trust him + open up to intimacy again#OURGHHHHHH. I had to go out to the park alone and walk around in the dark and pouring rain for an hour just to feel normal after that#the way reets family were so immediately accepting of em and basically adopted em on the fucking spot too 😭😭#I loved enae as well the exploration of hir grief + complex feelings towards hir family was so well done#also rly cool to see an older protagonist ESPECIALLY an older nonbinary person I was thinking how incredibly rare that is#all the protags arcs just meshed so well together as an exploration of the themes. v well constructed book#ann leckie got me wanting to use neopronouns now goddamn#ALSO SPHEEENNNNEEE god i missed it so much 😭😭😭😭😭 i might have to reread the ancillary justice series soon#weird dimensional tech + cannibalistic body fusion have gotta be 2 of my fave ever sff features too. books that were written JUST for me#the presger translators were one of the most intriguing parts of the ancillary series im so glad leckie picked that back up!!!!#1 million thoughts. anyway I think matching w someone would fix me who want to melt into each other and become a single multibodied being#.diaries
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#im freaking out at the prospect that this may be the new normal for awhile#i never know when i get worse if its temporary or ive gotten long term chronically worse tm#i have absolutely no idea whats causing me to be so messed up tho#first was the physical pain hitting like a truck for some weeks but thats not that bad now? that got a bit better#now is just. bone deep exhaustion with 0 escape. for so many days almost in a row ill just feel like i need to randomly collapse and take#a very. very long sleep#i dont know if ive been this bad since i was on birth control years back#.#maybe it rly is just. months of stress and physical pain and slightly relapsing into bulimia and just. s t r e s s#hitting me all at once#lmao i have no idea how im going to get through life like this. im back again at that point where i wish i could just conveniently die
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i made a creature <3
#its name is Beast#sorry 4 not being online again lol im just so tired#ive been doing a lot of conflict resolution for my sister and parents which is suuuuper stressful#also my mom got mad at me this morning for having a headache bc apparently being young means u can’t have health problems. like ok#anyways that made me sad so now im being emo in room#in my room*#sorry for complaining on tumblr.edu i would normally complain 2 my sisters but i don’t want them starting fights on my behalf#n e ways#should i make a tag for my crochet stuff? i post a lot of it and i want to be able to look back when i get better at it#i also made a new coaster that u can kinda see in the background. it’s the pink one :)#omg this is so unrelated but spiderman musical songs keep getting stuck in my head. i might actually relisten and that makes me SO mad#peyyi crafts#new tag 🫣
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I DID AN ENTIRE PAGE OF SKETCHES TODAY! but im getting a little burnt out on the manga stuff, for now. i’ll keep at it! i just need a little bit of a break.
#doing no manga work for like a week and then getting right back at it with an entire work half day. i do things Normally (/s#but fr i was a goddamn machine today. i will e ever consider to do this again#originals#txt
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hgnnghh... college friend has been asking me questions abt adhd n how to get diagnosed n stuff recently, which i'm more than happy to help him with, but just now he sent a tik tok that was like "maybe i should ask abt this too?" n it was like "why do adhd people seem to crush so hard" n it was like.
now listen i haven't had a serious romantic feeling since i was in middle school, but the description in that tik tok literally dragged the memory of all that out of my chest n i just said to him "haha yep... that's accurate my dude" as though it hadn't just described what was easily one of my top ten "do not ever repeat this again" experiences of my life
#i then proceeded to tell him that he probably shouldn't be pathologizing every little trait n thinking it's a 'symptom' or w/e#like if adhd tips help n stuff then just follow them; if you feel medication would help talk to your doctor etc etc#but also like. i don't wanna live my life like 'ugh i'm hyperfixating on my crush again but i don't want to make a move'#'bc what if they think i'm weird/creepy/just not interested in me back ugh i'd literally just die' PLEASE LET ME BE NORMAL ABT THINGS#idk just the way everything was described. ugh! the shame!!#i think i used to talk abt this more in the very early days of the blog (bc that's when i was still rlly bitter abt my last crush)#but like yeah it seems i really don't like to think abt romance when it's abt myself or my past w/it#i'm okay with the idea of like. being older n doing things in a more mature way should anyone ever grab my interest#but like idk!! it's weird!!! bc when rereading my old middle school diaries it's like 'aww yeah i was really struggling w/this'#but it's very deeply sympathetic like 'yeah it was rough but you'll get through this; it gets better'#for some reason watching this tiktok was just like. a fucking ice bucket of shame. like what the fuck who gave you that right#the worm speaks#i'd really just rather romanticize falling in love the way i have been doing these last few years through anime fanfiction#and never ever ever ever ever ever ever deal with whatever the FUCK happened in middle school ever again bc we were v immature then
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can’t believe I’m about to risk the anonymity of my secret danganronpa account (IF YOU KNOW ME IRL NO YOU DONT) but we had to cancel our sdr2 game night yesterday cos someone was busy so the rest of the group came round to help me decorate my christmas tree instead and it went normal
#I honestly have no idea what happened#turns out we shouldn’t be left unsupervised with a printer and some ribbon#I opened up photoshop for the first time in a year just to add Handjime to the Nagito decorations#if anyone wants Nagito with Handjime or any of the other Christmas sprites to print out let me know I guess lmao#there are normal baubles on there I swear we just had to put them on the back so the tree didn’t fall over lmao#w i d e Nagito tied to the star kills me every time I look at it#I wonder what young coco would say if I could go back in time and tell her this is what being in her mid 20s looked like#‘yes this is your first Christmas living by yourself with complete control over the decorations’#tbh she’d probably just be confused why it wasn’t pokemon#turns out adulthood is having to figure out how to avoid having your anime Christmas tree in the background of work video calls#in semi-related news I finally remembered to pick up my mood stabilisers from the pharmacy today#anyway anyone got any advice on how the hell I explain this to my Nan when she comes to visit soon lmao#oops rambled in my own tags again
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Me, the last few days: why do I keep getting intense vertigo and nausea?? On Tuesday it must've been motion sickness but that doesn't last for days after
Me, today, finally remembering I meant to take my BP about it:
Wrist cuff: 85/56
Me: oh.
#personal;#i am now on my back with my knees up bc there's nowhere to prop my feet easily#i don't know. when this gets like. concerning. like ER/hospital concerning#looking it up things just seem to say to watch for shit becoming shock or w/e#but idk where that line is#i'm not hyperventilating but i'm paying very close attention and breathing consciously so like#don't wanna go to a dr about it but if it hits again tomorrow i can't work with it and the only way for that shit excused is to ER#but then they'd probably figure i'm wasting their time#even if my bp is still Low when i get there#(and the idea of getting in a moving vehicle rn just makes the nausea worse)#thinking about it this might've started on Sat- i was having anxiety and stabilitt issues that weren't normal Sat and Sun#but i told myself it was blood sugar and wrote it off#and i've gotten lax on taking my bp daily
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