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celiaelise · 8 months

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bro the next time my mom tells me I'm "making too much noise" when I'm doing a normal task at a normal volume, I might just tell her, "I am making a normal amount of noise; you just don't like me!" (sort of like that one dril tweet, "you are just mad at me for some reason.")

Cause I don't think she knows she doesn't like me?? She's gonna be like, "of course I do, you're my daughter!" And I'm gonna say, "no you don't. You love me and you care about me. You don't like the way I dress, talk, or behave. You find me irritating and are constantly telling me I'm doing something wrong. You don't enjoy time we spend together. You don't like me."

Of course, then we have to be careful of her asking the corresponding question: do I like her? I wouldn't mind admitting that I don't, but every time I explicitly express a negative opinion of her, she turns it into this self-pitying thing, where she decides I'm calling her "the worst mother in the world." (actual words she's referred to on several occasions, despite the fact that even if I did feel the need to detail her shortcomings as a parent, which i don't because i don't want to get into it, I wouldn't do it by comparing her to every other mother on the planet. She could be the best mother in the world, and it wouldn't change the fact that she should've done better.)

Granted, this is all assuming she even listens to any of the words I say in the first place, which will be a toss up.

#anyway it's fine i don't live with her anymore #i just spent a little too long there tonight bc we were celebrating my brother's birthday #my life #ec #eclipse #my family #by elise

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davidtennantpussytulpa · 7 years

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Nymgobblepot (hope i spelled that right...)

THANK U ILY ❤️❤️❤️

Send me a ship and I’ll tell you

•Who accidentally pushes a door instead of pulling/vice versa - GOD eddie DEFINITELY hes a genius but fuck if he can open a door right (however oz does run into doors a lot he walks so confidently and forgets to stop and open things)

•Who doodles little hearts all over the desk with their initials inside them - i would say oz but his desks are probably made out of mahogany or some shit so he probably just carves it into the skin of some guy hes killing so he doesnt waste his money

•Who starts the tickle fights - ED!!! EVERY time oh my god he would try and tickle oz discreetly at the lounge or smth where he couldnt react but ed is dumb bc every time oz would fuckin tickle him relentlessly when they got home. no fuckin mercy you do NOT fuck with the bird

•Who starts the pillow fights - id say ed again to cheer up oz on a bad day so he can get some anger out and it can turn into ANOTHER pillow fight ;);););) if you know what i mean ;);););););)

•Who falls asleep last, watching the other with a small affectionate smile - i would think they both would but i would say ed would stay up on purpose to do it

•Who mistakes salt for sugar - ED i love him but for a genius hes an idiot and gets so caught up in his own shit that hes like well i guess im having salty coffee (but would he even taste it? would he notice? of course not)

•Who lets the microwave play the loud beeping sound at 1am in the morning - OSWALD bc hes tired and doesnt give a shit and maybe ed did smth to piss him off that day

•Who comes up with cheesy pick up lines - UHM DEF ED bitch comes up with riddles ALL day you know HALF of them are just ‘hey wanna go fuck?’ or 'you know who is beautiful? you’

•Who rearranges the bookshelf in alphabetical order - ED my poor boy…. he has OCD and he has to…

•Who licks the spoon when they’re baking brownies - OZZIE and it pisses ed off but he relented when oz was like 'we have our tongues down each others throats half the time i dont think me licking this spoon will make a difference’

•Who buys candles for dinners even though there’s no special occasion - OSWALD my bitch so extra hes like that dril tweet where their budget is fucked by all the candles

•Who draws little tattoos on the other with a pen- they both would like when one is lost in their work (or when ones sleeping and the other cant) they just doodle all over them (mostly question marks or penguins) to show them that they love them and they belong to them

•Who comes home with a new souvenir magnet every time they go on vacation - EDDIE and he would arrange them like a map!!! (sidebar - oswald would fuck his shit up one day by creating a puzzle with them for him, all ending with a new magnet which is their wedding location HI ITS AN ENGAGEMENT)

•Who convinces the other to fill out those couple surveys in the back of magazines - OSWALD pls he will always be my emo teen

#oh my god that got really long SORRY I JUST LOVE THEM SO MUCH #THANK U SO MUCH ILY ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️#jasonmatthewbiggs #nygmobblepot #u got the spelling close enough lol #gotham #asks #long post

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