what a goofy gooper. what a goopy goober. what a goopy gooper. whouphfh oghhf aughfh goop goopyg ooper-

Gud morning folks. For new followers, on Munday I just do a random dump of OOC rambles that have nothing to do with Shaw or this blog. Under the cut is stuff about animals, my suspicions of the “mean lesbian” Tumblr trope, and how I don’t have a Spotify but what my list would be if I did:

- I really, really miss riding horses. I get the occasional trail ride once or twice a year, but I want to do more than just sit there on a walk through the woods. I want to actually RIDE again, like actually DO THINGS---trot, turn, canter, maybe even jump. I miss it a lot. - I’m very proud of my chinchillas and how well-socialized they are! They’re friendly to strangers, and will try to go to not only my dad, but also my mom and sister when I hold them near them. Chinchillas are very timid animals, hard to win over, and typically bond with only one person, so this is really awesome for them! - Fun fact about me, I am the most timid little person in public. I am lowkey terrified of people and always ready to bolt when I’m alone. I still go out and get a soda and stuff, just I’m very high-alert and I’m super non-confrontational. I basically have the same defense as an opossum, in that I try to be as contrite and apologetic as possible to avoid trouble. But when I am out with a female friend, I just go like, full guard-dog mode internally. I’m completely ready to fight the fuck out of anyone who bothers her. I had mostly forgotten this about myself because I’ve been in quarantine so long, but when I went to see my friend this month and we went walking the dogs in a dark park with no one else around, I was like, I will absolutely kill someone tonight if I have to.  - I’ve been having rat anxiety dreams again. Basically scenarios in which I fail to take care of my rats and they suffer/die for it, or there’s too many rats to take care of at once :C - I have made jokes about being a “mean lesbian” myself because of how I rag on any male fave I have, or how I just don’t give a shit about the dudes everyone else in fandom/tumblr/etc is apeshit over, but like. . .I feel like the Tumblr invention of the phrase “mean lesbian” is ultimately couched in very heteropatriarchal stereotypes around lesbians. Because it case you didn’t know, lesbians have typically been represented as extremely unpleasant in media for a long time; positive rep for us is pretty new. The lesbian in media is invariably a man-hating, penis-envying shrill feminist strawman (usually overlapping with the “no-fun feminist who thinks everything is sexist and all men are evil” stock character) or, at best, a laughable object of disgust for her gender-nonconformity, her ugliness, her fatness, her short hair, her non-sexual attire, all the things that make her unattractive to men and therefore both useless and a walking insult to them.  And this animosity towards lesbians, and depictions of us as horrid two-dimensional viragos who are just angry and mean all the time, comes from the patriarchal assumption that not being interested in men means hating them, because, as I’ve noticed for a long time, cis men just can’t fathom DISINTEREST in them, nor can society in general. They can’t IMAGINE that a woman just DOESN’T CARE about them one way or the other, we HAVE to be OBSESSED with them in SOME way, even if that way is hating them. That’s why SO MUCH of the perception of lesbians I encounter from people, or the questions I’ve gotten pertaining to being gay, is seldom focused around asking why I find women attractive, but on asking why I DON’T find men attractive. Because, as women, our sexuality MUST be focused around (cis) men, even if the focus is rejecting them; they can’t just be a non-issue to us. And, of course, that rejection cannot be “I’m just not into bros, bro” but an active seething EVIL HATRED. We must DESPISE them. And we’re BAD for that. We’re MEAN. As is ANY woman who, say, has turned down any man ever, or who has the mildest of issues with even the most egregious sexism, hence why feminists are always depicted as shrieking harpies who flip out over absolutely absurd shit, rather than ever having anything resembling an actual point about a real issue. We’re just MEAN, man! And that makes us easy to dismiss. Along with all the uncomfortable truths we draw attention to. See also: Angry Feminist, Angry Black Woman, etc. Maybe I’m reaching, but much like all the gross stuff that Tumblr has made around tops and bottoms that is just sexism 2.0 (pretty much every stereotype about bottoms is a stereotype about women, it’s just seme and uke all over again) I don’t think that the “mean lesbian” thing came out of nowhere with no basis in anything previous. I think it’s absolutely got sexist af roots, or at least very well could, even if people, including lesbians, are using it affectionately now.  - I once told a friend that Artemis and Athena were my favorite Greek deities as a kid and she said “no one is surprised”

… yeah, yeah that’s fair -  I don’t have Spotify, but here’s a playlist Youtube made for me based on what I listen to most there: Winterborn by The Cruxshadows Rasputin by Turisa Wolves Without Teeth by Of Monsters & Men City of Night by Miracle of Sound King & Lionheart by Of Monsters & Men Still by Alanis Morissette Sophia by The Cruxshadows Nothing I Can Do by Dreams in the Witch House - A Lovecraftian Rock Opera Rammstein vs Lady Gaga - Du Hast vs Telephone mashup All the Myths Are True by Abney Park I Don’t Know How To Love Him from Jesus Christ Superstar Reverent of Rats by Powerwolf Temple of Love by The Sisters of Mercy Blinding by Florence + the Machine Eye To Eye from Disney’s “A Goofy Movie” by Jonathan Young Come With Me Now by Kongos Airship Pirates by Abney Park Like A Prayer metal cover by Jay Smith The Hype by 21 Pilots She Sells Sanctuary by The Cult Plush by Stone Temple Pilots Beast of Gevaudan by Powerwolf The Tale of Cu Chulainn by Miracle of Sound I Like Giants by Kimya Dawson Birdhouse In Your Soul by They Might Be Giants

30 Days of Hypmic Challenge

Day 6: Favorite Matenrou Member

It’s Doppo. Doppo y’all since he’s my favorite overall. But since I don’t feel that’s fair, I’m gonna go ahead and talk...

Hifumi Izanami! To which, I’m gonna be honest with you. I wasn’t a big fan of him when I first started the series. I mean, yeah he’s a hot guy but like that’s the point of the series. Plus I only really had Rhyme Anima and the songs, which too me way too long to look up the lyrics. So to me, I thought he was a complete ditz with yet another strange personality gimmick (Don’t look at me like that, they all have one. I’ll even admit my fave is definitely one of those) and liked causing trouble, probably while drunk!

But. BUT. Getting to read the manga and also some fanfics, I have come to completely change opinion on him. So yeah, thanks some of y’all for tripping me into this man’s arms. So I can hug him...if only I wouldn’t scare him so. But yeah, I really do like Hifumi and looking back, I have no idea how I couldn’t have liked him since I like sunshine boys with some secret aaaannnngsstttt. Okay enough just how I got to him but about him.

I will say, Hifumi is the most fucking confident bitch I’ve ever met. Like he’s so fucking unapologetically himself and has not a one doubt in his manliness. He says and does things that are stereotypically associated with women and he doesn’t care who knows and would even show it off. Hifumi finds absolutely nothing wrong with his habits...and a couple of those times, I think he’s legitimately having an issue seeing an issue...but yeah, he likes himself and what he does and has no shame about himself (except that thing but that’s for later). This man knows no fear and I absolutely am living for this no filter self. 

And I keep wondering how he has moments of just so shamelessly stepping on toes like he does with Gentaro and Rio when I’m so sure he has immense emotional intelligence. Yes, he flirts as a host but just platitudes can only get you so far. And considering I haven’t heard Hifumi doing a crapton of surgeries or anything to keep himself looking the kind of pretty his clients would want, Hifumi has to have something other than just his looks to be number 1 (although I have little doubt about him working out regularly and has a beauty routine). And that is being able to understand them and emit the kind of attention that they need or want from him. In the Host ARB event, Hifumi even displays and recognizes what he does. He knows that he does not love them but he does know he wants to give them comfort and soothe them.

I do kind of wonder the canon way of thinking and dealing Hifumi does with his persona. Because how I commonly see and accept of it is that host mode is usually referred to a Gigolo since it’s not very often Hifumi does his rapping without it. And that Gigolo is simultaneously Hifumi and not him. It’s not like Hifumi is unaware of what he’s doing as Gigolo nor that it is complete personality overhaul. But it isn’t how Hifumi is on a daily basis and it’s enough that, Doppo--the only reference we have for a long standing relation with him--does not like Gigolo. He literally always complains about what happens when the jacket is out. Now that may just be because he knows that the shameless flirting causes trouble but I personally think Doppo does not like Gigolo as this doesn’t feel like his friend so much as a co-worker he has to deal with. 

I don’t think many people think about Gigolo being as savage as he is because he needs to be. The other aspect of his hosting are the other fucking hosts. It’s cutthroat and you’re going the balancing act to keep on top. Like apparently clubs compete with each other??? I mean in way that makes sense but no, it’s like a grudge match because the top hosts are the ones that have to rake profits in for their club and fund, for a lot, an expensive lifestyle. And not just other clubs but within clubs too! You gotta keep bringing clients or y’know, they might have to let you go. Or you lose privileges that are afforded to you as top dog. And while Hifumi seems respected and respectful of teaching others, he has not a single doubt in being number 1 and surrendering that to anyone. 

Oof, now to the hard part. I think part of the reason I didn’t initially like Hifumi was because I went in thinking his personality ‘gimmick’ was going to be a joke and very annoying. So imagine the surprise it is that they actually do take Hifumi’s trauma seriously. Like yes there are hijinks from Gigolo doing shit but scenes where it is Hifumi without his jacket, I can’t really think of times when it is being treated as a joke. He is really terrified for his life that any of these women are going to HARM him and quite frankly there are very few times where women that have come in contact with Hifumi aren’t either out to hurt him or have the willingness to do so to him. And never once has anyone that has taken notice of it have ever shamed him or mocked him for it. Like Gentaro AND Dice witnessed the change and even if they didn’t like him, would never think to target him for such a thing. Because it’s fucking traumatic and it’s not a shame in finding a method that allows you to cope with living. 

And it’s a shame that Hifumi believes himself to be a weak person for not being able to face what has hurt him. And that’s simply not true. Courage is being able to take on things despite being afraid. And god was Hifumi afraid of encountering Honobono again but that didn’t stop him from wanting to moving on. It didn’t stop him when it meant someone he cared about getting hurt. Even if Hifumi couldn’t have faced her at all, I still wouldn’t hold it against him. Because making it through his ordeal in the first place was courage enough. 

Okay basically done but quick blurbs I have that don’t fit anywhere else. I personally think Hifumi’s strength lies with the dissing and respect my name aspect of rapping as his rap battles are savage and he sounds like he might bust some kneecaps in Shinjuku Style. Why the hell are you making bedroom eyes at me every other card? Please Hifumi--Also, is there a reference or something I’m missing as to him having a hobby of making ships in bottles or is that just an accept headcanon sort of thing????

1131

survey by lilprincess

Approx. Time you began this survey: 6:46 on a Wednesday evening.

Describe your mood right now: Erm, a bit exhausted because I just ended a work shift; but content for the same reason. Right now I’m simply looking forward to dinner and crashing on the couch or my bed, wherever I feel like sleeping tonight.

Spell your first name without vowels: Rbn. Let’s just also remove y for this one.

Age you will be on your next birthday: 23.

Zodiac Sign: Taurus.

Do you believe what your horoscope says about your sign? I do not believe in astrology whatsoever.

What state/region do you live in? Somewhere in the Philippines somewhere close to Metro Manila.

Height: Like 5′1″ ish. I had a massive growth spurt in 4th grade that also ended in 4th grade, which will always be a funny story to tell people lmao. I went from being placed at the back of the class line to the front really quickly.

Do you smoke? Super occasionally. My last cigarette was like...all the way back in February last year. It was easier to hide the smell around my family before, but because my parents and siblings have mostly been staying at home in the last year it would be so easy to weed out the smell. I never feel like smoking anyway since I vape, so there’s been no reason to seek it out.

Do you drink? Yeah, sometimes socially and sometimes on my own if I wanna unwind and feel a lil buzz come through.

What's your ethnic background? Southeast Asian, specifically Filipino.

What's your religious background? Technically my ~background~ would be Catholic since I was born and baptized in that faith, but I’ve long let go of this. Excluding one very brief period in high school, religion was something I never held much belief and faith in, even if I've been taken to literally every Sunday mass for the last 23 years and even if I was enrolled in Catholic school from preschool to high school.

What's your natural hair color? Black.

What;s your natural eye color? Dark brown, almost black.

Do you have any bad habits you want to break? I do overtime work a lot but used to seldom file it on our company shift log sheet because I get shy that they must think I’m doing it just to be paid more, lol. I’m starting to file them every time I do OT though because fuck it, pay me.

Name a few of your positive habits. I like that I always find a way to meet deadlines. I like that I’m selfless, even though some would see it as a flaw. I’d rather do too much than say I never did anything at all.

Have you ever lived in a foreign country? No, the most I’ve done was travel to one for a week.

Did you vote in the Nov. 6 2012 presidential election? No because I am not American -___- The last election that took place before I was eligible was in 2010, and had I been able to vote then, I would’ve given mine to Gibo Teodoro, who I believe was the most qualified at the time.

Are you even eligible to vote? Yeah, I’ve been for the last 5 years. I’ve voted twice - once for the presidential elections back in 2016, and the next was for the senatorial elections in 2019.

Are you right handed or left handed? Right-handed.

When you write, is your penmanship usually neat or do you tend to scribble? It starts off neat for the most part, but it gradually gets messy and becomes more like a scribble if we’re talking about writing several essays in one sitting, which was usually the case in my exams in college.

Have you ever experienced an accident? (of any type): Sure, I’ve been in car accidents before. I’ve also been shocked once.

Do you have/want children? They would be nice to have, yeah. 

Are you environmentally conscious? For the most part, yeah. But there are some things that can’t be helped, like me driving. Unless the government does something about the shitty public transport system that we have and have had for decades, I refuse to take it.

What's your favorite mode of transportation? Like I said, my own car. If I’m traveling, by plane.

Do you prefer 80's - 90's music compared to today's music? Eh, not at all. I prefer music produced these days.

Are you more of an introvert (quiet/shy), or extrovert (social butterfly)? I’ve been more of an extrovert in the last few years but I will always be shy at first upon meeting new people, like that will never change. I warm up a lot quickly now, though.

What's your favorite emoticon? :)

Do you miss the good old days of hand-written letters? I caught the super super super last part of this era, so I didn’t even get to experience it. I know snail mail was still kind of a thing when I was a kid, but at the same time that was happening my mom was also already using email to keep in touch with my dad, so.

Nowadays, though, when I do write letters to loved ones, I will still prefer to make handwritten ones, especially for a significant other or best friend. I don’t think I’ve ever sent out a computerized long letter.

Do you enjoy receiving or giving more? Giving, but it’s nice to be treated too sometimes.

Are you good at keeping secrets? Sure.

Do you take or give advice more often? I don’t usually get into situations wherein I’d have to do either, but I think I’ve been asking for advice more, especially over the last few months.

Do you have your driver's license? “I got my driver’s license last week, just like we always talked about...” Haha this question made me sing a bit. Anyway, yeah, I got it shortly after I turned 18 since I needed to quickly learn before college started.

Would you rather be poor & happy or rich but miserable? Rich but miserable. Soz but I’d solve 4854983594857 of my problems if I never had to worry about money.

Have you ever had a pregnancy scare? Never.

Have you ever blocked someone on Facebook? Probably not blocked, but I’ve unfollowed some current Facebook friends and unfriended others entirely.

Do you think recreational marijuana should be nationally legalized? Idk much about the topic since it’s taboo enough where I live, but sure, I guess?I haven’t heard one bad word about the effects of marijuana.

Describe your perfect first date. I’ve never really had a first date, but I imagine an ideal one would be pretty lowkey, just a stroll around a nice city and maybe have fancyish dinner somewhere.

Have you ever been high? Nope.

Have you ever watched a NC-17 rated film? Sure. A good handful of Kubrick films pass for NC-17, right? I’d be surprised if they weren’t, lol. I’ve been scarred by some of them for sure.

If you ever become reincarnated as an animal, what would you want it to be? A dog.

Do you remember where you were/what you were doing on September 11, 2001? No; I was 2 years old. I did ask my parents where they were in those moments, and my mom understandably missed most of it since the entire thing unfolded in the late evening in the Philippines. The only thing she can recall was being insanely worried for my dad, who had just started to work in the US back then.

Do you ever wish you were of a different nationality/religion? Yeah, to a certain extent, just because the political and socioeconomic situation here is very messy and it doesn’t really give us the nicest reputation in front of the world. I’m proud of my Filipino culture and heritage though.

Are you more of a junk food addict or health nut? Health nut is the last thing anyone should be calling me. But I’m not so much a junk food addict either? I do like spoiling myself with food, but I still monitor my intake.

Do you believe Antarctica should be considered the 7th world continent? Isn’t it already though?? We’ve always been taught there were 7 continents and Antarctica is one of them lol.

Describe your own sense of humor in 1 word: Gen-Z, if that counts as one word.

Have you ever quoted the Bible (or any other Holy Book)? If I ever did it was probably meant to be sarcasm.

Have you ever completed a Sudoku puzzle? No. Never figured out how to play it either.

Would you rather be a nuclear physicist or marine biologist? Marine biologist. That’s one step closer to one of my loves, biology. Plus I was never any good with physics, so.

Do you have a deep, dark secret you're hiding from every one? I guess.

Would you rather be able to soar like an eagle or swim like a dolphin? I’d make my childhood self happy and go with flight.

If you wanted to learn a foreign language, what would it be? Korean so I can finally stop reading subs, hahah.

Are you bi-curious? No.

Did you watch the Disney Channel or Nickelodeon more as a kid? The Nickelodeon cartoons were far more interesting to me. I think I only got into Disney when I got a little bit older, once I was able to appreciate the more mature content in shows like The Suite Life, That’s So Raven, etc. But for the most part our TV was always tuned into Nick Jr., Spongebob, Jimmy Neutron and the other Nick shows.

Name 5 films that were made the year you were born: American History X (great watch), The Truman Show, Mulan, La Vita e Bella if I’m not mistaken (one of my faves, no matter how gut-wrenching it is), and Shakespeare in Love.

Did you have a lot of friends in high school? Yes, eventually I did.

Do you rely more on the newspaper, Internet or TV as your news source? Social media these days since I find that online writers are far more discerning in their reporting than TV anchors, who stay neutral at best.

True or false: Bigger is better. Very vaguely put, but not always, I guess.

Do you think religion is the primary cause of war? No? There’ve been plenty other reasons for war.

What's your favorite pizza topping? ...Cheese.

Think of your wardrobe. What color do you wear the most? It’s still black, I think.

Have you ever been to a planetarium? Just once, on a middle school field trip. I’d love to come back, though.

Do you feel like you connect more with animals or other people? I don’t get to be with animals a lot other than my dogs, so I’ll go with people.

Do you feel like sometimes you have to lie in order to protect yourself? Wow so dramatically put haha but yeah, I suppose it does feel that way sometimes.

How often do you exercise? Literally never. I’ve stopped working out this year since I didn’t see the point, and I’ve stopped feeling like I had to ‘get back’ at my ex just by getting a more toned figure. I’m totally at peace with how my body looks, plus I never want to give up on my favorite foods and snacks lol so there’s that.

Can you swear in a different language? Putangina mong bobo kang gago ka. That’s three for ya.

Do you think teachers/doctors deserve to get paid more than pro athletes? Everyone deserves to be paid fairly to the point that no comparison should be necessary, period.

From a scale of 1- 5, you would rate this survey: Erm, a 4.5. I had to delete some questions I didn’t feel comfortable answering or that I found a little meh, but the rest I fairly enjoyed.

Do you think most of these questions were more original or more ordinary? It’s a bit in between.

Approx. time you completed this survey: Hahahahah 10:38 PM. I took a million breaks.

Tell us all about why Henry Tilney is your favorite Austen leading man!

!!!! this ask! 💕 OKAY SO im really much into spreading the Tilney love for sure because everybody is lost in their Darcys and Knightlys and for sure they are great (just look at my Austen tier list, they are up there) i love them too but folks.... HAVE YOU ALL thought about Tilney for more than 2 seconds?? because this man lives in my head rent free for YEARS. so here is my random assortment of thoughts on this topic. also disclaimer i saw the film and read the book so many times i’m not sure which part is in which so don’t at me

he is a sassy bitch and im here for it... sassy AND sarcastic to be more exact. every time he makes a comment about society or life itself it’s just pure gold. he is subverting conventions and we love him for it. 

he is absolutely shocked when mrs. allen asks him if he understands muslin because WHY WOULDNT HE

he knows EXACTLY how smug he is sometimes, but also swoops in with some self-deprecating jokes for good measure.

This in itself:

overall a very different love interest than the others because he starts being interested in Cathrine once he knows Cathrine is interested in him? love this baby. 

he is THE complete OPPOSITE of an alpha male.

HIS SMILE

the whole sequence just before he introduces Elinor to Cathrine? absolutely showstopping

has 3 or 4 dogs? hello?

since he is all Elinor's got after their mother passed he probably got into more feminine things to be able to relate to her sister and be there for her. and this means two things: amazing brother, also really comfortable around women in general. and all in all shows no toxic masculinity. 10/10. absolute win. (to be fair 19th century standards)

a 19th century man who reads NOVELS?? what else can we ask for??

absolutely astonishing relationship with his sister

clever but not in your face clever. irony is his preferred language and whats not to love about that

he would be the type of man who would sit on his porch in his 60s and constantly laugh at ppl and i can very much relate. but until then he goes to parties to be snarky with girls bc what else a man in his 20s would do

while his father mostly is a dick and probably had a shitty childhood he is not bitter in any way and actually stands up to his father when needed. he was like you know what dad fuck you and your money i love this girl imma marry her so bye. 

He is cocky but not too cocky. he is constantly teasing Cathrine but is also very sweet while doing it.

He grew up with excessive wealth but his dream is to have a nice little cottage with the love of his life. bc from the get go he knows as the younger son this what he gets and he accepts it.  

oh did i already mention the way he smirks? yeah... that is not allowed

ready to forgive and understand other people’s opinions and actions? wow. the meme 'ive done nothing wrong ever in my life - i know this and i love you’ is actually based on HIM. i mean Cathrine literally accused his father of murder for god’s sake.

Cathrine speaks Tilney goes into 😍😍😍 mode

he is a middle child but shows absolutely no middle child syndrome signs.

THIS, without any comment: “Catherine, catching Mr. Tilney's eye, instantly received from him the smiling tribute of recognition“ 

gotta say JJ Feild portraying this man added much to my love for him. 

he really goes the extra mile to sell northanger abbey as a haunted place because he knows Cathrine loves this. 

he is just THAT guy who knows exactly what’s going on in any given second. Thorpe being interested in Cathrine? first second. His brother doing god-awful stuff? check. Isabella playing the innocent girl while we all know what’s going on? absolutely check. 

if northanger abbey would get a modern adaptation this man would BE THE SAME. he needs no change he is a modern man stuck in the 19th century and he is absolutely loving every second of it

im pretty sure this is because NA is austen's earlier work but he is a clergyman yet he has nothing in common with any other clergyman characters and i for one LOVE THIS

yall like to call Darcy a dork, which is true i admit but just consider this

he sees Cathrines's innocence and instead of making fun of her or taking advantage he mentors her because he do be a DECENT DUDE.

in conclusion: as the 19th century girls would say a very charming and agreeable fellow

im probably missing half of the stuff that makes me love this man so much. also yall feel free to leave your fave tilney moments, let's just SPREAD THE LOVE

Survey #391

“if you wanna soar with vultures, you’ll have to swallow crow”

Have you ever been to Australia? No. I want to visit a friend there, but honestly, Australia scares me too much lmao. That place is like, the Hard mode in life. Who was the last person you know to have a birthday? My sister's husband just had his. Are you wearing a necklace? If so, describe it. No. Do you know anyone who is left-handed? My best fren. Ever wear out a CD? What was it? Haha, yeah... I caused a few scratches on Ozzy's Black Rain, as well as one more of his, where the album name is surprisingly evading me. What’s your favorite card game? Magic: The Gathering. What’s your favorite fast food meal? Burgers or chicken tenders are usually my go-to, depending on the place. Where is the best restaurant you’ve ever eaten in at? The Cheesecake Factory. @_@ Lamb chops or pork chops? I've actually never tried lamb chops before, but I've always thought they look yummy. If you HAD to pick ONE song to listen to for the rest of your life, and that would be the only song you ever heard, what would it be? "Life Won't Wait" by Ozzy Osbourne, probably. It's very motivating. Ever heard of Shinedown? Yeah, I like 'em. They're one of Dad's faves. What size is your bed? Queen. What is the first meal you remember eating? Hell if I know. What was the first movie you ever saw? I also don't remember. What percentile of your class were you in? The top. Can you name every place you’ve ever had sex? I probably could, but I'm not going to. What forms of birth control have you used? The pill and also just not having a sex life lmao. Do you use sponges or dishcloths when doing the dishes? A sponge. What’s your favorite song on the top twenty right now? I have zero clue what's in the top twenty. Ever punched a wall? No. What was the last bug you killed and what did you use? An ant in the house. My fingers. Ever get pulled over by the cops and get away without a ticket? I've never been pulled over. What was your first legal alcoholic drink? A margarita, I think? What’s the most expensive things your parents ever bought you? Probably this laptop. What’s the most expensive thing you’ve bought? My snake. Or my most recent tattoo, idr. What is your favorite cover song? I think Disturbed's "Sound of Silence" is unbeatable as a cover. Well, or Johnny Cash's "Hurt." Both SLAUGHTER the originals. Did you ever drop out of school? College, three times. Ever raise a child that wasn’t your own for more than 3 months? No. Strangest medical procedure ever performed on you? Considering the location, having a pilonidal cyst drained by pushing on it. Jesus FUCKING Christ it hurt so goddamn bad. Does the place you work have music playing? What sort? I don’t have a job. Do you use Windows, Mac, Linux, or something else entirely? Windows. Do you cut tags out of clothing so they don’t itch and bother you? Yes. How many times a year do you go on vacation? Zero, generally. What is your favorite time period in history to learn about? The Holocaust. What’s the saddest report you have ever seen on the news? *shrug* I don't watch the news. In your honest opinion, what is the scariest sea creature you know? Putting aside my illogical fear of whale sharks, probably giant squid. Like no thank u. What superpower do you think would be the most handy in times of trouble? Teleportation. Do you believe there is just one love for everyone, or…? No. There are WAY too many people in the world for that. Plus, you're talking to a person who has been in love with two different individuals, and both were perfectly valid feelings. Why are you best friends with your best friend? She's just simply amazing. Strong, funny, intelligent, caring, supportive, loyal... She's, again, amazing. Do you world peace is truly a possibility in the future? Realistically, no. But it's nice to imagine. Pretend you are a really good cook, what meal would you make? *shrug* It would depend on what I wanted to eat. What do you think of when you look at the stars? Just the vastness of everything, and I wonder what it's like up there in outer space. If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is he homeless or naked? Dead? Their shells are part of their actual skeletal structure. What’s one thing you feel you must do in your life before it ends? Just... feel like I did something. What Disney princess are you most like? Personality-wise, I mean. Maybe Belle? To be totally honest, I don't really remember the details of most of their personalities. What do you think is the most important thing in this life is? Love. Do you use any acne medication? Not anymore. Have you ever tried to learn another language? How did it go? I took Latin for one semester, and it was hard as FUCK. I quickly changed to German next semester and did that for all four available classes. Do you still have a landline phone in your home? No. Throughout a typical week, which places are you likely to go? I go to the TMS therapy office every weekday, and I might ride with my mom to pick up groceries or something. How often do you use your webcam, if you even have one that is? Never anymore because my mic doesn't work on this laptop, so there's no reason to. Do you have a lock number or pattern for your phone? Neither, actually. What was the last thing you bought from a liquor store? Mom bought a nice bottle of some pink lemonade Smirnoff the other day for us to try, but she left it at my sister's. ;-; It looked soooo good. Is there any cereal in your house? What kind? Yeah. Mom got some Honey Nut Cheerios and Reese's Puffs. What's the most number of people you've ever lived with? Excluding myself, I wanna say five. Do you celebrate St. Patrick's Day? No. Do you have any pets? How long have you had them? I've had Venus forrrr... I want to say four years, and Roman for two, I think. What's your favourite kind of cheese? American. Have you danced in the rain? No. Who is your favorite person to text? Sara. What’s your favorite brand of jeans? I haven't worn jeans in many years. Do you enjoy Mario games? Not especially. Mario Kart is fun, though. What’s your favorite online game? World of Warcraft. Have you ever been hit with a ball in gym class? Yes. That shit hurts. Who was last to cook for you? My mom. Would you ever wish to explore a cave? YES!!!!! You see the person you fell hardest for. What do you do? Freeze, physically and mentally. Have you ever ridden in a car with someone who was high? Yes, because I was afraid to say no. Did you ever date the last person you kissed? Yes. Have you ever held a snake? Plenty of times. How often do you have friends over to your house? Never. Have you ever had a boss who acted unprofessionally? No. Who was the last person who cried around you? Why did they start crying? Was it unexpected? My mom, because she always feels unwanted at Ashley's house. It wasn't unexpected, honestly. She cries a lot in the car when she leaves my sister's house, honestly. It's heartbreaking. Do you have any exercises you do everyday? No. :/ Are you more of a dog or cat person? I'm a cat person. That only becomes more apparent with time, really. Have you ever had a dream of stabbing someone? I probably have, given I've had nightmares of strangling someone, punching and slapping people... all kinds of stuff. My nightmares are so fucking violent and I hate it. Would you ever have a bird as a pet? No. Have you ever had to speak at a funeral? No. Do you know someone who’s been cremated? My dog, as well as my younger sister's old pup. And Mom's. What is your favorite animated movie? The Lion King. Did your grandparents teach you anything? To not be horrendously old-fashioned and to never have kids, yes. Congrats, Grandma, I took both things to heart. Do you want/have a Bachelor's degree? No. Are you into superheroes? Who's your favourite? Not massively, no. I like Deadpool (yeah, yeah, antihero, whatever) and Spider-Man. Have you ever played Cards Against Humanity? Did you like it? Yes to both. Have you ever played a drinking game? Which ones? I don't think so. Did you ever play Neopets when you were younger? Yes, I LOVED them. Sometimes I'm still tempted to make a new account, I shit you not, lol. Have you ever been to Mexico? No. Have your parents ever worked in medicine? My mom was a pharmacy technician or some title like that for a long time. Is there anything unusual about your house? I don't think so? How many serious relationships have you been in? Two. Do you listen to Rise Against? I only know "Re-education (Through Labor)," but I LOVE that song. When was the last time you congratulated someone? It was probably something on Facebook, but idr. Have you ever taken care of a newborn baby? Go no, I could never. How old were you when you got your ears pierced? I don't remember my age, but old enough where I did it of my own volition. Do you snore when you sleep? No. Surprising for someone with sleep apnea as horrendous as mine. What was the last type of burger you ate? I had a McDouble from McDonald's a few nights ago.

star trek: tos season 1

I’ve been rewatching Star Trek: The Original Series instead of starting anything new (of course) and I have some thoughts about season 1! I love this show. Here are some random things I love.

1. Kirk and Spock wordlessly communicating. They’re in love, okay.

2. In ‘The Naked Time’, everything is falling apart, the bridge is in chaos, Kirk loses his temper, Uhura loses her temper. Then Uhura takes a breath, and she is immediately back in ultra professional mode, damn whatever she’s actually thinking and feeling. And Kirk immediately apologizes. It’s amazing.

3. I appreciate random shirtless Kirk. And that time Sulu was randomly shirtless and attacking people with a sword. (The look on the two dudes’ faces when he is brandishing his sword at them in the corridor is PRICELESS.)

4. The unicorn dog. Fave.

5. Spock playing the ka’athyra, and then Uhura sings with him, and she’s totally good-naturedly poking fun at him the whole time, and Spock accepts it with such good humor and he has no feelings my ass.

6. Obviously Kirk’s shirt tearing all the damn time, sometimes with no plausible reason. My favorite is when McCoy just rips the shoulder open to jab him with a hypo on the bridge.

7. There’s some pretty nice work done in the pilot establishing that Kirk and Mitchell have a long history and a deep friendship, and that makes what happens in the episode so much more tragic. I also love Spock’s easy acceptance of Kirk wanting the record to state that Mitchell (and Dehner) died in the line of duty.

8. Uhura competently taking over other positions on the bridge at a word from Kirk. The implication that all members of the bridge crew/senior staff have their specialties but learned all necessary functions in case of emergency is really nice. (I’ve noticed Sulu taking over navigation sometimes, too, and Scotty’s taken the helm at least once, and Kirk himself operates various positions.)

9. One of my favorite things about Star Trek is its optimism, and also the enduring sense of hopefulness and compassion it and the characters embody. In ‘Charlie X’, even after all the shit he did to them, you can see that they are nevertheless moved by Charlie’s genuine terror and Kirk tries to come up with a different solution that will help him. Or in ‘The Corbomite Maneuver’, after the alien has threatened to destroy them, and he puts out the distress call, Kirk’s response is still to help.

10. Kirk is in love with the Enterprise and the show doesn’t even try to be coy about it, it just comes right out and says so. Multiple times. <3

11. It’s clearly a product of its time and some things are... not great, but I love that it tries, and it honestly wants to portray a future where everyone is treated the same and things like race and gender don’t matter, even if it isn’t quite there in the execution of it. (Yeoman Rand in particular gets some wince-worthy moments in the first season, unfortunately.)

12. Evil!Kirk wears eyeliner, because of course he does. LMAO.

13. The green shirt! I love Kirk’s green shirt. (Actually I love the TOS uniforms in general. Best Trek uniforms, fight me.)

14. McCoy and Spock making fun of each other. <3

15. The number of times Scotty tells Kirk he needs hours/days to fix/accomplish something and Kirk is like ‘you have ten minutes’ and Scotty is just like ‘...fuck, okay’.

16. In ‘What Are Little Girls Made Of?’ Kirk sabotages his android by thinking negatively about Spock because THAT’S the thing he knows will make it clear something’s wrong. OMG. And then Spock makes fun of him for using an unsophisticated insult. Hearteyes.

17. Every time Spock calls Kirk Jim. Also, every time Kirk calls McCoy Bones.

18. Their food is hilarious, it always just looks like little colorful blocks. And their idea of futuristic fashion is completely ridiculous and also the best. 

19. Kirk is so charming, but it’s so genuine, which is I think why it’s so devastating. When he’s looking at people, and smiling at them, you know he really genuinely gives a shit, and actually cares about them, and tbh I think I’d do anything he asked if he looked at me like that, lol. 

20. McCoy is a gift. He’s so grumpy! And he calls everyone out on their shit, especially Kirk, and he’d never say so but he cares so goddamn much.

21. I just ship Kirk/Spock so fucking hard, OMG. Every time they interact I’m just like YESSSSSS THEY’RE FUCKING IN LOVE DAMN.

22. “Fascinating.” <33333 Oh! And the eyebrow raise! Especially when he does it at Kirk. Or McCoy.

23. Kirk’s absolute faith in Spock at the beginning of ‘The Menagerie’. It’s a bit heartbreaking, considering. And the moment you can see Spock choose Pike over Kirk, at the end of Part 1, stabs me right in the heart. And when Kirk agrees that Spock is guilty during the “trial”. (Also I love that they found a way to use the rejected pilot and turn it into what’s really a compelling pair of episodes.)

24. ‘Balance of Terror’ is so good. It’s just a battle of wills between Kirk and the Romulan commander, with how difficult the pressure of command can be for Kirk, and that look into racism with the navigator who distrusts Spock.

25. McCoy and Spock having a battle of wills over Spock needing/not needing medical attention and raising their eyebrows at each other. Love. I understand the Spock/McCoy shipping. (Speaking of, in ‘Operation Annihilate’ when McCoy doesn’t want Kirk to tell Spock he said he was the best first officer in the fleet but Spock overhears and says thank you, McCoy’s face, lmao.)

26. When they find Kirk’s brother dead in ‘Operation Annihilate’ Spock actually attempts to offer comfort!!! Also Kirk holds Spock a couple of times in that ep, it’s great.

27. Every time Spock gets offended because they’ve accused him of having a human emotion or reaction. <3333

28. I think ‘City on the Edge of Forever’ works not just because it’s a truly compelling question of not holding one life, no matter how dear, over the lives of millions, but because Edith herself is genuinely lovely. You can see the tragedy in the death of a woman like her, and the soft romance between her and Kirk is beautiful.

29. And even in the midst of what’s easily one of the strongest (if not the strongest) of Kirk’s relationships on the show, you get Edith saying that she can see that where Spock belongs is by Kirk’s side. My heart.

30. The Gorn. Come on. Iconic.

31. As compassionate as Kirk is I also love the moments that remind you that part of the reason he’s such a good captain is that he’s ruthless when he needs to be. He will make the hard decisions firmly and surely and he won’t let his crew know if he’s internally struggling with them.

32. Kirk’s fighting style!! He’s just throwing himself at people and hitting them with his ass and clinging onto their backs and I LOVE IT.

33. In 'Court Martial’, I think Kirk’s lawyer ex might wear a female dress uniform for the only time ever on the show (certainly the only time in the first season). All the times when the dudes are wearing them, the women are all still wearing their regular duty uniforms. It’s sort of hilarious to me that the men’s look so fancy but hers is just a slightly different collar and a longer skirt, lol.

34. When Spock mindmelds with the Horta in ‘Devil in the Dark’! It’s so sad, and I think that’s the first time we really get a look into what it means for Spock to meld, to share so deeply with another being. 

35. I’m into how Kirk looks in that old-fashioned suit in ‘The Return of the Archons’ but definitely nothing beats him and Spock in short tunics and tights in ‘Errand of Mercy’. Plus Spock gets a half-cape!

36. ‘The Conscience of the King’, responsible for so much woobie Kirk backstory, even in AOS fic where it’s not even canon, lol.

37. McCoy strolling out with those women at the end of ‘Shore Leave’, all “well I am on shore leave”, lmao.

38. Of course McCoy’s iconic declarations of ‘I’m a doctor, not a ‘insert occupation here’. 

39. The computer programmed to seductively purr at Kirk is hilarious.

40. The origin of the redshirt. Classic. 

A Kind Of Magic

Hello my lovelys! I am so sorry for not posting on Tumblr yesterday. I was in full writing mode and had to keep going or my train of thought would have been lost but I am back with two more posts for you this evening! :) While reading this part, I realised that I have not translated any of the Irish words in previous parts or given a phonic pronunciation of them as I did on AO3 so I apologise for that. My bad. I will go back and change that now on my previous posts. This is another one of my favourite parts from this story. It makes me smile a lot. So here are the words first: Cwtch - is Welsh and pronounced ‘kutch’ (As google told me) Camogie - Ka-mo-gee (Where gee rhymes with key) Sliotar - Shlit-her And the pictures for this part help visually with what cwtch looks like and what hurling is :) Thanks again for all the lovely Tumblr love. You are all wonderful! 

22

“This is the part where I kiss you.”

Robyn arrived home from work on Monday in a wonderful mood. The funding she had managed to secure had arrived and it was more than she thought they were going to get and was very excited about the research she had started on for rehauling the garden. Also, the new girl who had started was fantastic and an absolute God send for Robyn, taking up Valerie’s old position in the preschool room easily and the children already loved her.

“Hey Taron!” She called happily as she hung up her coat in the closet at the door. “Taron?” She called again as she walked out of the closet and closed the door. “Tar…” Robyn stopped speaking when she walked into the sitting room. “Oh no.”

Lined up along her couch were her teddy bears and sitting in his usual space in the corner was Taron with a large blue dinosaur on his knees.

“Hello Robyn.”

“Been snooping by any chance Taron?” She asked.

“I had no idea there were drawers under your bed and when I opened them, I found all of these!” He said smiling.

When Robyn had purchased her bed, she made sure it had lots of storage space underneath and she used a lot of it to keep her soft plush bears and animals, not willing to put them in her attic. Being a woman in her thirties it was not very grown-up to keep teddy bears on display but she couldn’t part with them so kept them, but kept them hidden away.

“You are like a bloody sniffer dog.” She said as she sat on the poof.

“I love them all but this dinosaur I think is my favourite.” He said giving it a squeeze.

“I don’t have a particular favourite but you might have seen a pattern here.”

“These ones?” Asked Taron as he pointed to the right side of the couch where he had all the Care Bears lined up.

“Yeah the Care Bears. The brown one, my favourite. Tenderheart Bear.” Robyn moved and lifted the large plush toy and sat down on the couch. “You probably think I am a wierdo, with all the teddy bears.” She said hiding a little behind the bear in her hands.

“Not at all and don’t make that noise at me. I don’t judge you for any of this. I told you. I love them all. I had a good time pulling them out and looking at them, wondering what story you had for each of them.”

“Well the one you are holding I won from a claw machine in Galway.”

“Seriously? This thing is fucking huge! It’s bigger than my upper body and you won it from a claw machine?”

“I am quite talented at them. The rainbow unicorn, London bear, glitter eyed bear and a few of those smaller ones I have won from the claw machines. The glitter eyed bear is actually called Freddy.”

“After Freddy Mercury?” Asked Taron as he reached over for the soft brown and black bear.

“Yeah. Remember in the 7/11 I told you about the time I had to sing the Queen song and freaked out over remembering the words?” Taron nodded at her. “Well that gospel music festival was in Galway and I won that bear and called it Freddy.”

“Do they all have names?” Asked Taron, putting the bear back.

“No, just the ones that have a memory attached to them.”

“Does this guy have a name?” He asked holding up the dinosaur.

“Nope. The festival was in Galway the next year as well and I won him too.”

“Can I name him?” Asked Taron.

“Be my guest.”

“Let me have a think.” He said as he turned the dinosaur around so he could look at him properly. “So, you also love the Care Bears?” He said.

“I know I am a nineties kid but I loved eighties cartoons and the Care Bears were my fave. I have been collecting them. I had auditioned for Wednesday Adams for the musical society and desperately wanted the part but I was so ill during the audition I couldn’t sing the song, didn’t get the part and I went to Tesco afterwards to buy my weight in chocolate and there on the shelf was this bear, True Heart Bear, one of the first original Care Bears. I was so excited and it was a bloody bargain at fifteen euro. It was going to make up for my terrible audition. She was beautiful, all rainbow coloured but when I went to pay for everything, they couldn’t sell her to me. She wasn’t supposed to be on the shelf and I questioned it and they still wouldn’t sell it to me. I even rang the head office the next day to complain and the person on the phone was so lovely but it was something to do with stock rotation and they couldn’t sell the bear. I was absolutely devastated and as you can tell. Still as bitter as ever.” Robyn laughed a little. “Seems petty, it is just a teddy bear, but at the time it meant a lot to me. Still does but I cannot get it anywhere however I do keep adding to my collection. No idea what I am going to do with them. Maybe I will build another room and put them in glass cases and display them all!” She laughed. “And now I am rambling about fucking Care Bears. Jesus Robyn shut up. Shit sorry Taron.” Robyn felt her whole face heat up with an embarrassing blush while Taron’s face lit up in a massive grin as she rambled on.

“I am calling this dinosaur ‘cwtch’” He said.

“Bless you.” Replied Robyn which made him laugh hard, Robyn not having a notion to what word Taron had just used, but she knew it was Welsh.

“You are the epiphany of cwtch.” Taron chuckled. “It’s a very special welsh word for a hug or comfort but not just any hug or kind of comfort. It’s the most important and extraordinary type of love you can feel for a person. It’s more than just a hug, it is something shared between two people, that only those two people understand and have this connection of pure trust, faith and belief. It’s what we have and it’s what I am calling this dinosaur so when you look at it, you will call him cwtch and smile and think of our time together.”

Robyn moved the care bear that was between herself and Taron and sat right beside him. “I love it. Cwtch.” She repeated. “Though I don’t need a blue fluffy and glittery dinosaur to think of our time together Taron but…” She took the dinosaur from his hands and made the sign of a cross over his blue forehead. “I now christen thee, cwtch.” She said. “And it is official.”

Taron took the plush back. “You carry a very important name now catch and you must uphold the honour that comes with such a responsibility and always be trusting, faithful and believe that one day I will be back to take you out from your home of darkness and show you the light!” Taron held the dinosaur over his head and started to sing the chorus from The Circle of Life, Robyn chiming in with the Zulu words.

Laughter filled the air as Taron lowered the dinosaur slowly to his lap, the two grinning at each other. “Can he stay on the couch? I would feel bad putting him back under the bed so soon after his christening.”

“Why not. He matches the décor.”

“So, he would have been going back in if he was a red dinosaur?” Asked Taron.

“Yep.”

Taron hit Robyn with the dinosaur, gently. “Don’t worry cwtch, I’ve got your back.” He stood up and placed the newly named animal in the corner. “I will put these back for you and I wasn’t lying when I said I like them. I like snooping around your home and I like it even more that it doesn’t seem to bother you at all.”

“I told you Taron, nothing to hide.”

“Can’t wait to see what I discover tomorrow.” He said giving her a wink before he turned and grabbed a handful of her bears and walked around the couch. “I also want to write a strongly worded letter to Tesco for you. Not very fair having the bear on the shelf but not selling it to you.”

“Thanks Taron. I mean you have connections, might sway them to dig through their store room and find one for me, especially if they get a letter from none other than Elton John.”

Robyn stood up and picked up some of the Care Bears and helped Taron to tidy all of her precious bears back under her bed.

After dinner, Taron sat lazing on the couch, his new dinosaur friend beside him while Robyn was outside routing in her garden shed for something. He had no idea what she was looking for, but quickly added the garden shed for his next place to snoop. He saw her through the glass doors closing the garden shed and she walked around the side of the house and in through the kitchen patio door.

“Right Mr Egerton. It’s time to get physical.” Taron looked over the side of the couch to Robyn who was holding two wooden sticks in one hand and two white balls in another. “We have spent way too much sitting on that couch. I think it is time I introduced you the concept of hurling.” Robyn carefully threw one of the balls his way, Taron catching it in two hands.

“Hurling?” He asked looking at the small leather ball in his hands the same size of a tennis ball.

“Yep. One of the most fast paced and some would say dangerous sports played in Ireland.” Robyn walked over to him, bouncing the ball on the end of the stick she was holding.

“So, you know I am under doctors orders to rest.” He said. “I am not allowed to play hurling.”

Robyn grinned at him. “Well come and get some fresh air with me then.” She handed him one of the sticks that was flat with a curved end. “It doesn’t take much effort.”

“You just said it was one of the most fast paced and dangerous game in Ireland.”

“When you actually play the game properly. We are just going to go and hit the sliotar, the ball, with the hurley stick into the goal.”

“Me and cwtch are just going to hang out here.”

Robyn moved to stand in front of him, her head tilted. “It’s just like cricket.”

“I am feeling kind of achy today. Think I should stay on the couch.”

“Achy my arse!” Laughed Robyn. “You had no trouble moving all those bears to the couch earlier.”

“The bears are light.”

“I will show you how to bake key lime pie tomorrow.”

“Ok so you just hit the ball like cricket?” Taron got to his feet while Robyn smirked at him. “What’s the shit eating grin for?” He asked.

“Men are easily bribed.” She said as she started to walk away from him still hopping the ball off the end of the hurley.

“You were a sporty kid, weren’t you?” He asked as she followed her out the front door, closing it behind him.

“Absolutely not. I never was sporty but dad encouraged me to play camogie, the female version of hurling. I gave it a season but then gave it up. I am not a sports person but every now and again, I head out to the football field and have a play around.”

“And now you are dragging me with you.” Taron said as he watched her still volley the small ball off the hurley stick.

“I will pay you in baking skills and to be fair you kind of owe me.”

“How?”

Robyn stopped and caught the ball in her left hand. “Do you think any other woman would have allowed you to snoop so much through her home and not say anything about all the re-arranging you have been doing?”

Taron smiled a little. “I was wondering if you were ever going to say something. I have been waiting for the backlash for moving all of your stuff around.”

“No backlash to come from this woman.” She said, walking up the drive to her old childhood come. “I have found it amusing.”

“You switched the shampoo back to way I put it.”

“I can get used to little changes, though the DVD’s will probably not stay backwards. My OCD is not liking that change at all and I am just going to get the dog, if that’s ok. She’ll happily run around the football field while we are in there.” Robyn could see a little confusion in Taron’s eyes as he followed her around the back of her old house. “And like I said you owe me.” Robyn used the hurley to roll a green tennis ball back and flick it up in the air, catching it in her left hand along side the other ball she was holding.

“Should I be worried?” Asked Taron as they walked into the back garden.

“Nope.” Answered Robyn giving her mam a wave through the kitchen window and she continued on into the house, Taron right behind her.

“And you’re back for more stories Taron?” Asked Lizzie when her daughter and guest strolled into the kitchen.

“Nah just for Pearl.” Answered Robyn, the dog running her way, tail wagging. “I am going to show Taron how to play hurling.”

“Do you want a helmet?” Robyn’s dad strolled into the kitchen when he heard his daughter mention hurling.

“A helmet?” Taron looked to Robyn, eyes wide. “I need a helmet?”

“No, you don’t and we are going now. I only wanted the dog.” She lightly pushed on Taron’s back. “You don’t need a helmet. Let’s go.”

“Don’t hit the ball at his pretty face Robyn!” Called Lizzie as her daughter rushed out of the door, pulling on Taron’s hand as he went, the dog following them.

“Maybe I should take up the offer of the helmet.” Questioned Taron as they walked back down the drive.

“We are going to be hitting the ball at the goal, not each other.” Robyn gently threw the tennis ball down the road, the dog running straight after it.

“I don’t need matching bruising on the other side of my face though.”

“Thought you said you trusted me?”

“I do.” Taron replied quickly. “It’s the wind and force of gravity that I don’t.”

“Good answer but you’ll be grand. This way.”

Robyn made her way in through a small hole in the hedge, calling Peral who came running, Taron following her up the small incline and into a football field he had no idea existed beside her house.

“Welcome to Kilcreen’s local GAA club. You have gained access through the private entrance.” She grinned, picking up the tennis ball Pearl had left at her feet and throwing it further away this time. Robyn walked over the grassy area and ducked under the bars to get onto the pitch, the dog coming back with the ball again. She dropped the white leather ball from her hands and picking up the tennis ball, threw it in the air with her left hand and with one swift swing of the hurley, her two hands holding the handle, hit the ball for the dog down the pitch.

“Thought you said you only played for one season?” Taron watched at the dog ran full speed after the ball, while Robyn used the hurley to pick up the other easily and catch it in her hands.

“I did. I just don’t have the interest in the competitiveness of it and anyone can hit a ball with a hurley.” She walked over towards the goal. “Even you.”

Taron dropped the ball she had given him and hit it gently with the hurley, taking his time. He enjoyed how she easily invited him into her world and surprised him daily with little adventures. He hit the ball a little harder, still conscious of his healing ribs. Pearl ran past him and dropped the ball for Robyn and she quickly picked it up and hit it again for the dog.

“Are you even allowed in here?” He asked as he stood beside her in the middle of the goal posts.

“Absolutely.”

“Are you just saying that?”

“No one would try to kick me out. My dad is president of the club. He has been involved with the club since he was a kid and has coached many teams. He also got the funding which helped build that clubhouse.”

“Like father like daughter!” Laughed Taron.

“Yes, you could say so.” Robyn picked up the tennis ball Pearl had left for her again. “So, I can come in whenever I want and no one can say anything. You want to try and hit the ball for her?”

“I don’t think I will be as good as you.”

“She won’t care. She just wants to run after the ball.”

“You go again so I can watch and learn.” Robyn threw the ball up, swung back the hurley and hit it hard, Pearl galloping after it. “Just like that.” Robyn looked to him. “Don’t give me that look Taron. I watched Rocketman. I know you hit that baseball on your first take and nearly every take after that.”

“Ahh shit. I forgot about that.”

“Maybe I should have compared hurling to baseball instead of cricket.”

The dog came back with the ball and dropped it at Robyn’s shoes. Using the hurley, she picked up the ball and handed it to him. “Just don’t hurt yourself. Or me.”

Taron took two long strides away from Robyn. “No guarantee I will get this first go.”

“No pressure on you to do that.”

“I don’t want to disappoint Pearl.” When Taron moved away from Robyn, the brown and white dog followed him and sat sitting patiently waiting for him to hit the ball for her.

“I’ll speak to her if you don’t hit it.” Grinned Robyn.

Chuckling, Taron pulled his phone from his pocket. “Let’s make some more memories.”

“You want me to video this?”

“Yeah, why not. I can show my mates at home.”

“Don’t you want a practise shot?” Asked Robyn as she set up his phone to video.

“I am going to take a chance on the first try. Can’t let Pearl down.”

“Ok I am recording.”

Taron threw the tennis ball up in the air, a little higher than he meant to, with a thud that echoed around the empty field, hit the tennis ball a little further than Robyn had, the dog taking to a sprint to run after it.

“Ahh yes!” Shouted Taron with excitement. “And it was a little better than yours!” He gloated doing a little dance as he walked back over to her.

“That was a tennis ball, not a sliotar. It is a lot lighter.”

“You can do better?” Asked Taron taking the phone from her and turning it so both their faces were in the frame.

“Yes, I can do better.” She replied.

Taron held his hand out towards where he had been standing. Robyn smirked at him and picked up the sliotar and walked away from him, Taron filming her the whole time. The dog came to stand at her feet with the tennis ball, Robyn took it from the dog and threw it to Taron to catch. “Go sit with Taron.” She said to the dog, who followed her instructions and sat at Taron’s feet “Stay.” She hopped the white ball off the end of the hurley. “If I hit this further than you hit the tennis ball, then you have to go and get it.”

“Sure. That’s all?”

“You want me to ask you to wear your Elton hot pants and send a picture of you doing so to Claire? And Maggie?”

“Ok so loser goes to get the ball.”

“Yeah that’s what I thought.”

It took less than five seconds for Robyn to throw the slightly heavier ball in the air and hit it very hard, the echo resonating around the empty field, as she put her whole body weight into the strike, the ball landing just past the forty five metre line on the opposite side of the pitch, much further than where Taron had hit his.

“Tennis ball?” She asked looking to Taron, who stood with his mouth slightly open but he threw her the tennis ball. From his throw, she hit it with the same force as the sliotar and the tennis ball travelled further. “Go Pearl!” She called and the dog left Taron’s side while she went to stand beside him. She took the phone from him. “Go Taron!” She laughed and he made a face for the video he was still filming and started to walk down the grass field to where Robyn had hit the ball, while she started to sing We Are the Champions as he walked away. She continued to film Taron as he picked up the ball and walked back to her.

“You still filming?” He asked throwing her the ball.

“Making memories, Taron, making memories.” She caught the ball and handed him his phone back. “You want to try and score some points now?”

“Let give it a go.” He agreed finally stopping the recording.

It was a half an hour filled with their laughs and shouts, Taron enjoying his newly learnt skill. He took it easy, making sure he didn’t push himself too hard but still celebrated each time the ball went through the posts into the goal and even more so when it flew over and between the bars.

“If you keep pulling out all of your surprises for me before Saturday Robyn, I won’t want to come back.” He said as they sat on the ground in the goals, Pearl between then, panting hard from all of her running around.

“And you have figured out my master plan.” She let out a fake cackle, Taron laughing at her.

“So, you don’t want me to come back then?” He said throwing some grass at her.

“You will always be welcomed back with open arms.”

“And baked goods?”

“If there is nothing in my fridge when you arrive, we can bake something together.”

“Like key lime pie?”

“Like key lime pie.”

“So, when do we get to make that? It was my reward for learning hurling with you.”

“Tomorrow?” She suggested. “I will have to get the ingredients in the shop.”

“Yes shopping! I love shopping.”

“We don’t need a pile of stuff Taron. Just the ingredients for the pie.” Robyn looked his way when a pile of grass landed on her arms. “And there is no surprise inside it either.” She picked the grass from her arms and threw it back at him. “It is one you could make for your mam and you won’t need a recipe for it. It’s very easy and simple.”

“You do realise that the things you are good at, like hurling, baking and playing piano are simple for you because you are good at them.”

“Well you are good at throwing grass it seems!” Robyn took some more grass from her jumper. She threw it back his way, another wade of blades landing on her once she got the others off. “Taron, you are…”

“Handsome? Funny? Incorrigible?” He asked grinning.

“That last one yes.”

“Oh, so you don’t think I am handsome then?” He got to his knees, his two hands at his sides, full of grass.

“Because I am really going to say that to your face.”

“So, you do think I am handsome?” Robyn shook her head at him, throwing the tennis ball for Pearl, who ran after it.

With the space between them, now that the dog had moved, Taron took the chance to move closer to Robyn. “Say it!”

“Nope.”

“Say it. Say ‘Taron you are handsome.’” He did the best Irish accent he could muster up, grinning as Robyn rolled her eyes at him.

“Nope.”

“You really should say it, especially if you believe it is true.”

“No, I really shouldn’t and nothing you can do will make me say it.”

“Oh really?” Taron dropped the grass he was holding onto the ground and with his two hands started to tickle Robyn, her hands immediately trying to push his away but Taron used his strength against her and continued to tickle her mercilessly. “Tell me!”

“Never!” Robyn tried to lay down, turn over and crawl away but Taron grabbed her sides and turned her over onto her back and got his hands to her stomach again, fingers tickling her skin as it came on show as she tried to move away from him.

“I won’t stop till you say it!” He laughed, enjoying how Robyn’s chuckles came from deep inside, as she squirmed under him. “Why Robyn I never knew you were so tickly.”

“Taron!” She called still laughing. “You are not going to break me!” She tried to moved his hands again but he knelt firm, nimble and soft fingertips running up and down her sides. Using her feet, Robyn started to push herself backwards, desperately trying to get away from Taron as he tickled her sympathetically, his own laughter filling the air. He snuck his hands under the elastic band of her hoodie and aimed straight for her ribs, Robyn immediately squirming more under his warm touch.

“Come on chicken, you know you want to say it!”

“Never!” Robyn tried to drag Taron’s hands by his wrists from under her jumper, but her movement only made him more determined and he put a little more vigour in the speed of the tickles. “Ok ok! Taron please stop!” She cried, wet tears starting to form at the corner of her eyes from laughing.

“Tell me you think I am handsome! Admit it!” He demanded feeling his hands slip down her stomach and she wriggled away from him. “Don’t even Robyn!” He chuckled.

Robyn moved a few inches backwards again when she felt Taron’s hands ease a little but then she felt a weight on her right leg and realised that Taron had thrown one of his legs over hers to carefully pin her down. “Taron!” She put her two hands on his chest and gave herself one more push backwards, while trying to knock him over with her other leg but her laughter suddenly stopped and she gave a shout of pain as her head hit the goalpost, Taron lifting his hands immediately from her.

“Robyn?” He asked concerned as he heard her groan a little, laying down beside her, so he was curled up protectively against her left side.

“Ugh why do I always get the raw end of these play fights.”

Taron brushed her hair from her face as he leaned over her, his leg still entwined with hers. “You ok?”

“Yeah I am ok.” She said bringing her left hand up to rub the back of her head. She felt Taron’s fingers beside hers as he massaged where she had hit her head off the wooden goal post, his hand that had moved her hair away now at the back of her head. “I hate being tickled.”

“I noticed.” He said grinning at her. “You sure you’re alright?” His hand moved back to her face, his thumb brushing her cheek. Taron felt his heart skip a beat, his stomach drop and a heat rise to his cheeks as he half held Robyn in his arms on the grass on the ground. His eyes closed when he felt Robyn’s left hand rest on his cheek and when he opened them, he didn’t even feel himself moving closer to her but her face was getting closer to his, freckles and blue eyes becoming clearer as he moved. A shaky nervous breath left his lips as Robyn’s hand moved from his cheek around to the back of his neck, her fingers twirling through his hair, her fingertips leaving electric sparks against his heated skin.

Robyn had never seen Taron’s eyes so dark, their colour changing almost completely to brown with a slight ring of green around the edge. Her right hand was still flat against his chest and she could feel how his heart beat changed quicker than a finger click. Her left hand automatically went to his cheek, her hand on skin that was blushed and warm and Robyn knew it wasn’t from their effort of trying to play some Irish sport. She inched her hand down his jaw, his growing beard soft yet coarse against her fingers. He hadn’t bothered to shave since last weekend and as her hand moved down his neck, her thumb grazed the mole at his throat and she felt him swallow as she lightly trailed her fingers across to the back of his neck and into the hair as the back of his head. Her eyes closed for a few seconds as his own hand cupped her cheek just as delicately as she had held his and when she opened her eyes, Taron’s forehead met hers and she watched as he bit his bottom lip before dipping his head a little so their noses touched.

A tennis ball dropping on Robyn’s neck, made her break the intense stare she had with Taron and her heart started to beat rapidly after it had near stopped as his perfect face moved from hers. Her hand dropped from the back of his neck , Taron moving right back from her face and she was sure the red tint that filled his face mirrored hers and just as she had been working on ignoring those bubbling sparks, within milliseconds, they were ignited again but Pearl had finally found the ball she had thrown earlier and happily dropped it back to her master, not caring that she was lying down on the grass with her new friend, breaking the tender but charged connection between herself and Taron

“Thanks Pearl.” Robyn pushed the dog’s nose from her face as she started to lick her. “Ugh Pearl no.”

Taron moved so Robyn could sit up and took his leg from hers so she wasn’t pinned down any more. They sat side by side with each other, Robyn throwing the ball for the dog again. It was the first slightly uncomfortable silence that ever fell between them, both thinking about what would have happened if the dog hadn’t of come back with her precious ball.

Taron was desperate to run his hands through his hair, stand up and shake himself off but instead made himself sit still and try to take calming breathes without Robyn knowing he was doing so, but as she sat right beside him, their shoulders touching, he could feel the one long breath she took. It seemed he wasn’t the only one who needed a minute or two to collect themselves. He tucked shaking hands under his arms but felt Robyn hook her right arm through his left elbow and the kiss she placed on his left cheek triggered the good kind of tingles on his skin.

Nervous energy ran through Robyn’s blood and she really needed to do something with her hands as she started to pull at the skin around her thumbs. Her heart was still racing and from the corner of her eyes, saw Taron slip his hands under his arms so she linked her arm with his and without thinking twice moved so she could kiss his cheek, lingering a little with her lips pressed against his soft skin before she turned back to stare in front of her.

“Taron?”

“Hmm?”

“You are easy on the eye.”

He chuckled a little. “Robyn?”

“Hmm?”

“You’re alright.” He chuckled more when she pulled her arm from his and dug her elbow gently into his left side. “You know I think you are beautiful Robyn. Inside and out.”

“Taron?”

“Yep.”

“You are handsome.”

Pearl came running back with the ball again this time dropping it beside Taron, who threw it for her again.

“We should probably head back.” Said Robyn as she looked to Taron. “It’s getting dark.” She dropped her left arm around his waist and leaning her head on his shoulder, gave his waist a squeeze when he didn’t answer or look at her.  “Few more minutes?”

“Please.”

Granting Taron his wish, she gave him another little squeeze, Taron dropping his own arm around her waist and when Pearl came back, Robyn made her lay down beside her, so they could just sit together and watch as the sky changed from light blue to dark blue to black, taking their heat from each other as they night drew in cold, that slight awkward moment between them setting with the sun, their usual secure feeling coming back quickly.

Birthday recap: the wind makes nice waves

Hey HEY, three of my very favorite people on this hellsite have birthdays this week, so buckle up for a variety of visual gifts in their honor! Let's kick things off with the tail end of leo season and a very happy birthday to this fandom's best graphic artist, Sam (aka @thewindmakesnicewaves​). Her talents are simultaneously a burden, a curse, and a gift, but she's the unsung hero of the Harry Styles hydration alert when all I can find are scraps of text. She's also one of my very favorite taggers because she consistently makes me choke on various beverages, and for that ALONE, she should be saluted and feted throughout the land. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SAM!!! <3333

I hemmed and hawed about what this present should be (various members of the D carrying far too many things? lots of hydration moments??), and then it hit me: a recap of the iconic interview that birthed Sam's URL, the moment when Liam Payne's hyperspecific nonsense about being scared of helicopters while surfing prompted Harry Styles to observe that he should (in essence) get over it because the wind makes nice waves and Louis "you do talk some shit in interviews" Tomlinson to respond with a seemingly genuine, "That is true." GOD fucking BLESS. Let’s check it out under the cut!

Like all of One Direction’s interviews, this one's fairly short (12 minutes) and well worth your time if you're bored and/or truly want to ponder spray tans versus real tans (Harry is code-orange GLOWING). Somewhat unrelated, is there only one French man who can interview them whilst in France? It took me an embarrassingly long time to realize that Cauet is a PERSON, not a media conglomerate, and maybe they were interviewed by other French journalists back in the day, but he was there for some pretty key moments, like this:

and this

and this:

and considering that he WAS there the day of the Paris interview, his question about Harry having a wife and a dog sometime soon during HS1 promo was extra hilarious (clearly Harry still has lots of gimmicky bullshit to do, lmao, help me, Jeffrey):

As ever, you can read a transcript, but I always vote for taking a kit-kat break and watching it for your own damn self: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CQ5sI0vgO3U. Here are some highlights to look out for:

There's a bunch of randomness about the French guy's pronunciation of “Made in the A.M.” and his opinions about “Perfect,” the new single that he's not too keen on (bastard), but he can't resist the face of tan!Harry prodding, “C'etait fantastique?” and who COULD? Mon dieu!! He's using past tense perfectly well, so stop it with this “the only French I know is me and my boyfriend went to the cinema” bullshit, my god, do I wish I had the power to gif anything, Harry's smart-ass face when he asks, the host's bashful response, sigh

Twin flames, y'all...the amount of times Niall tries/fails to follow Louis's lead, so...close!

But i feel for Niall because Louis low-key edges him along the entire time, what with the quiet asides, inside jokes, nudges, etc. (curse these lack of giffing powers!!)

The French guy wonders aloud how he can directly get the hot goss about when they'll be in France next (or in French-speaking regions), and petty Virgo Niall sarcasts that he'll give him his direct line [nail chew, chew]

“Five albums in five years, has time flown by? Or are you just taking your time?" Harry blathers on about how it feels like a long time ago, but it feels really quick and they're proud etc. etc., and I truly wonder if any of them ever wake up in a cold sweat about any of it, like, answering the same questions day in and day out

This is my vision of a sequel to one of my fave fics, “One day to believe in you,” by Mediaville; they’re together now, and Harry wears Louis’s cursed necklace during interviews as a low-key joke since it doesn’t have the same effect on him:

“Can you tell if a song is a hit?” Liam likes really strong album tracks, which earns him a really strong look from Louis and Harry lmao...Harry “doesn't really know, music changes so much, what people like changes so much, but that's what makes it so exciting” (I sincerely hope ”Medicine 2: I Blue You” comes through for me and Rubia)

With the crazy pace, “Do you wanna just chill?” and of course they do, my god, next question. “Where are you gonna go?” There's mention of the south of France, but another quiet aside provokes a Harry scold, so did they actually do it?? (no...yes...we’ll never know):

There’s a lot of talk about tours, money, the sound of the album, the fans, but it’s kind of boring to type compared to the rest of the exciting bits here, so I’ll spare us all

Next up is an awkward segue into how much French they know, the tee and the swing, mouth along if you know the words, and the truly funny bit is Harry acknowledging that the sentence itself doesn’t make much sense, really, but someone’s there with a solid assist:

MAYBE A BIRTHDAY OR SOMETHING

But then we get to the main event, what they’d do if they had an hour of not being famous, and Liam talks about going surfing alone because of how scary it was in Australia with all the helicopters in the air, and this whole moment is such an ASIDE, like, you'd never hear it on first blush, you'd be way more focused on Harry and his boyfriend’s cinema date, yet here we are, the helicopters kick up a lot of wind, the wind makes nice waves, and that is certainly true:

(Fwiw, Niall would go to a football game and sit in his regular seat; ditto Louis)

What interview in this era doesn’t mention Zayn’s departure? We all know the script, this time delivered by Liam, and the host makes his case for joining as the fifth member (Louis thinks the jacket works in his favor; I think they need to hire someone who can use better pictures than what’s in the 1D calendar):

There’s a contest to speak some French and win a snowglobe, and they’re all so in need of ANY kind of challenge to stay awake during this type of rote interview that they all perk up and move into competitive mode. Liam’s actually the most worked up about it, but he loses to Niall...no worries, though, Harry’ll buy him one (I have better ones in my bathroom, I’ll just give him one, what is this budget on this show???):

...and in the words of triumphant snowglobe winner Niall Horan, I “hope you have fun,” Sam!!

Jimmy & Janis

Jimmy: [Twix sees Janis and runs to her excitedly so he's just standing around awkwardly acting like what his little brother is saying/doing is the most interesting thing ever] Janis: [Hasn't noticed them 'cos running mode, until Twix nearly trips her up and she's like oh my fucking God, gives her begrudging love for as long as she can before she clearly has to like drag her back and then she tries to go but Twix follows so she's just stood there like well] Jimmy: keep her Jimmy: 💕 Janis: would but Janis: reckon the kids might miss her a bit Jimmy: does he look bothered? Jimmy: [Bobby isn't lol] Janis: miss her when she's gone Janis: [throws a stick for Twix so she's got something to do] Jimmy: used to that though Jimmy: [realises what he's said and is like awks but can't smoke in front of his brother so is just hands in pockets like WELL] Janis: [gives Bobby a sad kinda look but apart from that tactfully ignores, though does a lowkey doubletake when she sneaks a glance at Jim too] Janis: How's Ian? Jimmy: #goals Jimmy: obviously Jimmy: [but like touches his face without realising he's doing it & okay I'm giving him a fat lip so if they kiss again cos I'm evil] Janis: [looks away so she can bites her lip really hard 'cos deserves it] Janis: never disappoints Jimmy: I'll tell him you miss him Jimmy: [puts Bobby on a swing so he can push him & have something to do but is also a bit further away from her] Janis: please do Janis: unrequited is easier, so I've heard Jimmy: 👍 Janis: can't fuck that up, already hates me, see the appeal Janis: [goes and sits down on a bench slightly further away too but still in sight and is still throwing the stick for Twix and teaching her tricks etc] Jimmy: I'd love to tell you you're special, girl but he hates a lot of women so Jimmy: different girlfriend same main course when the bruises heal Janis: what could be better Janis: ain't special so don't gimme expectations to not meet, init Janis: she's onto something with this one at least Jimmy: & how #goals for him that the only girl he really loves is his daughter Jimmy: don't need to tell the fans it's debatable Janis: 💕 Janis: what a man Janis: [shaking her head angrily which he may or may not see up to you] Jimmy: he ain't smacked her yet so must be real 💕 Jimmy: save it for the sweet 16 Ian Janis: girl when it counts, we can hope Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: fave when it counts Jimmy: least like his least fave ex is all it takes Janis: get it Janis: Elizabeth I to your Edward VI Jimmy: take your word for that 'cause I don't Jimmy: get it Janis: you were made king when you were 9 just 'cos you're a lad and then you die at 15 and Cass is still considered one of the best rulers we've had Janis: there's another sister in there but she burnt a lot of Protestants and I won't give Cass that rep, bit dangerous 'round here Jimmy: alright, nerd Jimmy: [is trying not to lol even though she far away] Janis: soz you had TB you sickly child 🤷 Jimmy: I get it, you want me dead Jimmy: 🙄 Jimmy: [Bobby has moved to a climbing frame moment so he moves far enough away that he can 🚬 but obvs still keep an eye] Janis: nah Janis: just saying, might not be the 🚬 and I'd like to know if you were contagious Jimmy: you'd know Jimmy: [gives her a low key saucy look] Janis: 😳 Janis: [is that emoji good thing he probably can't see] Jimmy: you having one or 🚭 now? Janis: you offering? Janis: or just letting me know you hate me enough to light it now Jimmy: what was the question if it weren't that Jimmy: [but shakes the pack at her like hello?! cos cheeky] Janis: and you can't train Twix because??? Janis: [hesitates but comes over] Jimmy: don't wanna Jimmy: [gives her his which bit rude cos he's already started it & lights a new one for his self] Janis: poor baby Janis: [shakes her head like okay boy but still takes it] Jimmy: 💔 all around Jimmy: what would you do if I took your job, rich girl Jimmy: be bored to 💀 Janis: be nice Janis: don't reckon you're gonna give me that out though so Janis: [shrugs] Jimmy: you want out? Jimmy: 🐶💔 Janis: nah, not what I meant Jimmy: then what? Janis: 💀 Janis: but not gonna take poor Twix for a long walk to Beachy Head, don't worry Jimmy: I didn't lure you over here to murder you, dickhead Jimmy: threat of cancer or nowt Janis: gutted Janis: 💔 all around, you're right Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: I get it, not looking for that slow death Jimmy: me either Janis: something like that Janis: how quick is quick, do you reckon Jimmy: I'll let you know Jimmy: 👻 chat Janis: You did promise me a demi moore moment Jimmy: did I? Janis: think so Janis: maybe you just meant you'd cheat on me 'cos you're young and hot and on mtv, idk Jimmy: you know what I meant & I better not break it & your 💔 then I suppose Jimmy: [another lowkey saucy look] Janis: yeah? Janis: [looks back] Jimmy: gotta 💀 first though Jimmy: hang on, I'll step in front of a bus, if our fave driver is on I can really spread the 💔 about Janis: nah, always less of a promise, more of a threat but Janis: [finger guns at his head but with feeling, bitch] Janis: heart* Jimmy: [Bobby chooses that moment to lowkey fall off the climbing thing & like not serious but he's a little soft boy so has to go back & give him love] Janis: [takes several moments, offers Bobby some of her sports drink 'cos kids that age love anything that ain't a fruitshoot or water so he's buzzing] Jimmy: [big brother mode is activated so it's just cute & soft] Janis: How's Cass anyway? Jimmy: decent Jimmy: she's weird enough to like school Jimmy: or the break from him anyway Jimmy: [nods at Bobby but also clearly means Ian like] Janis: Fair enough Janis: not just your Da I miss, like Jimmy: she's been asking after you Jimmy: so mutual Jimmy: be 💔 she weren't here Janis: or she's playing the long game and is gonna come in swingin' Jimmy: maybe Janis: again, fair Jimmy: I didn't tell her you fucked off and 💔 me so Jimmy: probably should Janis: could Janis: or Jimmy: ? Janis: or you could not and let us be 💕 Janis: selfish 'til the end, me Jimmy: I told you, you can keep the dog Jimmy: you ain't having my sister Janis: worth a shot? Jimmy: she is less like hardwork now she's got a mate Janis: 👍 nice Janis: glad someone is living their best life Jimmy: as long as he is just a mate and she ain't 😍 for the lad Janis: cynic Jimmy: it's your fault Jimmy: you were meant to be a romantic Jimmy: tweeted it & everything Janis: sorry Janis: that tweet was fake, though, in my defence Jimmy: so was the sext but it still turned you on Janis: piss off Janis: [😳 again] Jimmy: are you? Janis: am I what? Jimmy: sorry Janis: yes Janis: of course I am Janis: I was sorry before I even did it, was during, definitely am now Jimmy: alright Jimmy: then I won't tell her about our real break up Janis: you can Janis: can do what you like Janis: I just, idk Jimmy: I don't want to Jimmy: I want Janis: [is looking at him casually not breathing here like] Jimmy: [is looking at her like !!! cos we all know what he wants] Jimmy: I want it not to have happened Janis: I can't un do it but we could Janis: it's our story, we can tell it how we want Janis: you know I didn't leave because of you, didn't want to leave you Jimmy: how do you wanna tell it? Jimmy: what happened Janis: I'm like you, I don't care what any of them think but it was like this Janis: I said things to Grace that I can't take back but then she said some things about me, about you and me, and then did what she did and then I was really scared I would actually hurt her and I don't mean like a slap, I mean I was terrified I would, I genuinely HAD to leave and that killed me because I didn't want to do that to you because I knew what it would do, that it would Janis: I'm so sorry Jimmy but I don't want to be that person, I don't wanna be like your Dad, really Jimmy: [hugs her really tightly because damn she needs it & Bobby joins in with a leg hug even though he don't know why & Twix is being cute] Jimmy: You're not Jimmy: You're Janis: [try not to cry, bitch 'cos love she hasn't felt since when?] Janis: I said really disgusting things, how could I turn around and tell you, I didn't want you to think of me like you think of him, but I was and it was so, it's shit being a bad person and knowing it, just shit Jimmy: [is just stroking her hair & being comforting because it's okay babe] Jimmy: what do you always say, nowt is unfixable Jimmy: you ain't gone & neither is she Janis: I don't know, some shit runs too deep Jimmy: she loves you though, I heard her say it enough when she was pissed Jimmy: & she's looked like shit the whole time you were gone Jimmy: I know you reckon she always cries but Janis: [does casual little sob lol 'cos his tact always, so in love bye] Janis: she said she's done Jimmy: I told you to piss off too but Janis: but? Jimmy: [kisses her which ouch cos the lip but he don't care] Janis: [kisses him back 'cos forgets herself but touches it so gently after] Janis: I'm so sorry Jimmy: me too Jimmy: it weren't just you Jimmy: I got scared when you were leaving so I had to make you, alright Jimmy: but don't Janis: I really did try not to fuck you up with it but Janis: I know I still did Jimmy: I am fucked up, that ain't your fault Jimmy: was before Jimmy: I don't want it to ruin this, but sometimes Janis: me too Janis: x3 Jimmy: you know how important you are to me Jimmy: so let's just Janis: can we Jimmy: we have to Jimmy: I can't do this without you Jimmy: be here Jimmy: be this dickhead Janis: [kisses him but avoiding the split expertly this time] Janis: you know I still mean what I said, don't you Jimmy: If I believed you were a virgin I can believe that Janis: [actually lols and nudges him like oi] Jimmy: [joins the lol] Jimmy: everything's shit Jimmy: except you Jimmy: that's what I know Janis: it's a cheek to ask but Janis: stay Janis: please Jimmy: [kisses her again & lowkey forgets it'll hurt him again cos so much love sorry bout it] Janis: you gotta be careful, boy Jimmy: I just Janis: me too Jimmy: I thought about you every second Janis: I should've text you, I didn't know what to do for the best Janis: nothing would make it better, for real Jimmy: I did but I didn't send 'em Jimmy: I Jimmy: it's better that I didn't Janis: don't worry, I imagined all the things you could say Janis: it was worse punishment to get nothing Jimmy: it weren't like Jimmy: it was just more about me Jimmy: & we said we aren't going that far back, yeah Janis: we don't have to, we're doing whatever we want, that's all Jimmy: well right now I have to go to the shop 'cause I promised our kid some sweets Jimmy: but if you wanna come with me then Janis: someone'll have to watch Twix, yeah? Jimmy: she is very badly trained Jimmy: 💔 Janis: slander Janis: 💕 Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: come on Jimmy: [Bobby & Twix are in front being cute so they can also be cute cos HANDHOLDING bitches] Janis: I missed you so much Jimmy: [kisses her again cos same but is more careful this time at least] Jimmy: I miss you Jimmy: I need Jimmy: more of this Janis: [nods like boy same] Janis: take it your house is a bit of a no-go for me though Jimmy: bit rude of me to ask but can we take these two to yours with us Jimmy: I know its overrun with cats but Jimmy: I don't know where the fuck he is or when he'll be back Janis: Yeah, 'course Janis: the cats will either run or give her a smack so she does but either way, it's cool Jimmy: I'll set Bob up with some drawing to do or whatever Jimmy: he'll be alright Janis: there's loads to do at mine, my sisters have got kids so there's toys and shit about, someone will keep an eye whilst we're Janis: busy Jimmy: It's bad that all I can think about is how much I want you, instead of worrying about him, isn't it? Jimmy: but Jimmy: I do Jimmy: want you so much Janis: nah, 'cos he's gonna be fine Janis: and Janis: I need that Janis: we both do Jimmy: fuck Jimmy: it just feels like forever Janis: I know Janis: especially since you kissed me Jimmy: you didn't forget about me, did you? Jimmy: 'cause if I have to remind you of everything I will but Jimmy: we're gonna need time Janis: How could I? Janis: as much as I really don't wanna turn that offer down Jimmy: I don't know just Jimmy: other lads Janis: oh Janis: guess that would make sense, where and how I'd been staying away, yeah? Jimmy: I'm not like Jimmy: It's alright Jimmy: we were broken up Janis: no, it's alright, fair assumption Janis: I didn't though Janis: just one lad who brought me home but I didn't sleep with him Jimmy: bit rude that you never asked but I didn't either Jimmy: no lads caught my eye Janis: know who your 💘 belongs to that's why Janis: should get the tat, very manly Jimmy: Obviously I drunk dialed Barry every night Jimmy: that's just Jimmy: what a man's gotta do Janis: [is loling] Janis: exactly Janis: who could blame you? not me Jimmy: nor my ex, she's well fuming with him basically every second so Jimmy: well rid Janis: you didn't get her on the line, did you Janis: not that I'm bothered but awkward Jimmy: only so I could teach her how to keep a man Janis: not 💔 at all, you savage Jimmy: she did message me for real the other day Jimmy: that was weird Janis: yeah? Janis: if she asked for hair she's probably not making a shrine, soz to burst your bubble, babe Jimmy: 😂 Janis: was it actually alright though, baby daddy drama aside Jimmy: she was Jimmy: her usual self Jimmy: that's all we need to say Janis: [does the ooh damn sound] Janis: can't wait 'til you start describing me like that Janis: 💀 Jimmy: you're not a mess Jimmy: & you didn't break up with me long enough ago to have a kid with someone else Janis: well Janis: to the best of my knowledge, nah Jimmy: if you're pregnant by that lad who gave you a lift I'm gonna be so mad Jimmy: just so you know Janis: 'less his spunk is dead hardy and survivng on those crusty sheets I had to sit on Jimmy: 🤢🤢🤢 Jimmy: there's the romantic I fell for Jimmy: welcome back Janis: ikr Janis: was magical Jimmy: #goals everywhere you go babe Janis: hard job but someone's gotta do it Janis: no way was I letting my brother pick me up, crying and having van flashbacks alone Jimmy: reminds me, are you gonna tell me who it is so I can beat the shit out of him or do I have to guess? Jimmy: you could've asked me Jimmy: I've offered to steal a car for you before, remember Janis: thankfully your paths will never cross 'cos he's that massive dickhead I told you about, remember Janis: also assumed being partners in crime was slightly out the window at the time so Jimmy: [makes the 😒 face IRL same Jimothy cos that lad's a delight, trust] Janis: don't look at me like that, I know Janis: needs must Jimmy: but did you really need to Jimmy: with that Janis: yeah, I'd ran out of cash, believe it or not Janis: can't use your card if you're serious Jimmy: [is pouty] Janis: Babe Janis: your lips are big enough right now, that's frankly obscence Janis: I told you, I didn't fuck him Jimmy: It's not that Jimmy: just Janis: I just weren't ready to see any of them Janis: to ask any of them for anything, that just ain't how I do Jimmy: I know Jimmy: It just scares me Jimmy: thinking about you being gone Jimmy: what could've happened Janis: [squeezes his hand tight] Janis: I'm well hard, despite what you've claimed, rudely, in the past Jimmy: if you have to go, take me with you, alright Jimmy: next time Janis: okay Janis: promise Jimmy: okay Jimmy: [nods his head in the direction of the approaching shop] Jimmy: want owt? Janis: aw get us some 🍬 too please Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: [gives her a really good kiss before he goes cos who knows how long Bobby will keep him in there choosing] Janis: [says 'love you' instinctively but it's quiet 'cos soft and as he's going in so he could pretend to not hear] Jimmy: it's a fucking 🐘🐅🐆🐫 in here Jimmy: that's zoo in case you were Jimmy: know you can't pick emojis to save your life Janis: not all creatives like you babe 🙄 Janis: gimme a break Jimmy: you're having one with your 🐶💕 Janis: yes please shh we're having a lovely time Jimmy: she's been such a tiny dickhead Jimmy: tah for not taking her with you Janis: was that not what I was meant to be teaching her? 🤔 Janis: whoops Jimmy: 🥇 already Jimmy: at that Janis: nah, never beat the master, thank you very much Jimmy: so supportive babe 💕 Jimmy: nah she won't Jimmy: I'm 💪 Janis: awks when I meant me Janis: this type of misunderstanding is why safe words were invented Jimmy: I know what you meant Jimmy: always do, me Janis: oh yeah? Jimmy: yeah Janis: don't hate the idea of you getting me Jimmy: don't hate the idea of having you Jimmy: right now I really don't Janis: fuck Jimmy: tie the dog somewhere & come kiss me again before I 💀💀💀 Janis: [does 'cos whipped and when it's what's what you want it's what you want] Jimmy: shit Jimmy: I don't wanna stop Jimmy: can't actually Janis: you Janis: you've gotta Janis: might be a zoo but don't reckon they're down for that kinda 🙈 business Jimmy: just gimme Jimmy: a sec Jimmy: more Janis: [does oh lads] Jimmy: you feel so Jimmy: stop me Janis: but Janis: I don't wanna Jimmy: but actually walk out Jimmy: 'cause I want Jimmy: & I'll do it if you don't Janis: [has Twix losing her shit so she can 'cos 100% looking at him like challenge accepted, gurl no] Jimmy: please go Janis: [is gone] Jimmy: 💀💀💀 Jimmy: can anyone pick us up 'cause if it takes forever to get to your house I'll Janis: can but ask Janis: won't go with the selfie approach this time, you'll be glad to know Jimmy: I'd rather you asked your hippie brother so we can go with that approach but Janis: I will Jimmy: 💕 Janis: he's about, also good with kids so a sound choice for babysitter Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: Bob's was alright with him so must be Jimmy: he don't like anyone Janis: wonder where he gets that from Jimmy: not the 🐶 Jimmy: right slag she is Janis: 😱 Janis: it's called being friendly Jimmy: I can be friendly Jimmy: I'll show you Janis: did I tell you how much I missed you? Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: but say it again Janis: I missed you so bad, Jimmy Jimmy: you're gonna show me too, yeah Janis: 'course I am Janis: so much to make up for Jimmy: go with the selfie approach right now Jimmy: I'm gonna be in this shop forever Janis: poor boy Janis: dunno know sexy you think I can be just outside but Janis: 💪 okay Jimmy: it's not a challenge if anyone can do it Jimmy: impress me Janis: you're being really Janis: inspiring, right now Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt Jimmy: so come on Janis: [selfies] Jimmy: It's Jimmy: but you only win if I'm begging you to come back in Janis: 😖 Janis: hold on then Jimmy: ready when you are Janis: [has gone somewhere less public for a sec so she can go harder] Janis: better? Jimmy: I Janis: 😩 Janis: you're playing so hard to get today Jimmy: I just really want you to win Janis: give me a clue, please Janis: wwhat do you really want Jimmy: you don't need any clues to that Jimmy: you can do this Jimmy: you're my muse, remember Jimmy: you tell me what I want Janis: okay babe Janis: [sends him short video playing and saying how bad she wants him and missed him etc 'cos go hard or go home] Jimmy: that sent a fucking shiver through me Jimmy: your brother better be on his way or you better come back Jimmy: 'cause you win Jimmy: I'm Janis: 😍 good Janis: I'm happy Janis: so tell the kid to get a wriggle on 'cos he's about to pull up Jimmy: okay baby Jimmy: I'm happy to do anything you say right now Jimmy: fuck Janis: I don't know if I can handle waiting much longer so Jimmy: you don't have to Jimmy: [they come out] Janis: [get in this van kids] Jimmy: [puts the kid and the dog in the front with Iggy for distraction so they can be alone in the back] Janis: it's been way too long since we were alone Jimmy: I know Janis: it's been so fucking hard seeing you at School and not even being able to talk to you never mind Janis: e with you Janis: be* Jimmy: I promised to fuck you at school Jimmy: I will Janis: God, yeah? Janis: [gets on his lap] Jimmy: first thing Monday Jimmy: I swear Janis: [is kissing him all over] Jimmy: why did I wear so much Janis: you didn't know you'd be seeing me Janis: or we'd end up here Janis: we can make it happen Jimmy: but I was thinking about it Jimmy: I told you, I haven't stopped thinking about you Janis: [takes off his then her outerwear to make it a bit easier without being suspect] Janis: tell me again Janis: but more Jimmy: [whispers it in her ear & her name with it cos like obvs] Janis: [can't even help the sounds she just made] Jimmy: [kisses her so he don't also 'cause you don't need to get rumbled before you've begun kids] Janis: do you want me to go down or you or do you wanna just fuck, I can't decide Janis: I'm so Jimmy: I want everything Jimmy: but I want to be inside you more than anything else Jimmy: you're just Janis: we've got nothing but time Janis: we'll do everything but Janis: just fuck me right now, hard and fast Jimmy: just cum for me hard & fast Jimmy: I need to feel that Janis: how does it feel when I cum around you Janis: I know how good it is when you cum inside me but Ive always wondered Jimmy: like Jimmy: you love me Janis: I do love you Jimmy: it kills me every time you say that Janis: in a good way? Jimmy: in a way that I can't even describe Jimmy: I'm dying but I've never been more alive at the same time Jimmy: maybe Janis: I'll keep telling you, you're so fucking good with words Jimmy: or like I've got everything to lose but nowt 'cause I've got you & you're literally telling me I do Jimmy: I don't know Jimmy: just Janis: [kisses him so hard so she isn't just screaming ILY in his face] Jimmy: I really Jimmy: feel it too you know Janis: I know baby Jimmy: you're all I want Janis: you've got me Janis: I'm completely yours Jimmy: [is doing his thing where he's trying to pull her closer the whole time but there's no closer to get. I love this clingy boy] Janis: [hops on that dick 'cos here's how you can get closer] Jimmy: oh my god Jimmy: [puts music on but a different song cos we're making new mems here kids] Janis: good idea 'cos Janis: wow Janis: you feel so Janis: right Janis: inside me Jimmy: I literally don't wanna ever do this with anyone else Jimmy: that's what you feel like Janis: good Janis: just me Janis: [makes him look at her by holding his chin] Jimmy: [sexy eye contact ftw cos when you're not me you can do that] Janis: the way you look at me Jimmy: how do more people not? Jimmy: seriously Jimmy: you're so fucking beautiful I Janis: I don't want them to Janis: no one else could make me feel so much with just a look Jimmy: I don't want them to either Jimmy: 'cause you're my girlfriend Janis: [starts exaggerating every move she makes, making it deeper as well as being in time to the song] Janis: I am Jimmy: baby Jimmy: [has to bite his lip 'cause damn so be careful boy] Janis: no Janis: bite me instead Jimmy: [does because who could refuse] Janis: I do like it when you call me baby, how did you call that Jimmy: you liked it when I fake said it Jimmy: I could tell Janis: there's a lot of things I liked that we fake did Jimmy: me too Jimmy: but this is Janis: real Jimmy: & better Janis: so fucking good Jimmy: [is just being extra on any of her exposed skin casually] Janis: how does that feel Janis: it's that perfect spot between pain and fucking Janis: whatever you make me feel is called Jimmy: how do you taste so Jimmy: all of you Jimmy: anywhere Janis: I don't know all I know is I want you to fucking devour me so maybe that helps Jimmy: everyone's gonna know we're back together Jimmy: I've really Janis: good Janis: do more, I'm your girlfriend Jimmy: [does & harder cos dutiful boyfriend] Janis: Jimmy that feels Jimmy: say it Janis: like fucking heaven Jimmy: [keeps going cos what more do you need to hear honestly] Janis: [going harder, takes one of his hands and puts it where she needs it] Janis: make me cum for you Jimmy: [hopefully does or else awkward] Janis: [takes his fingers away when she's just about to and put them in her mouth to suck on so she doesn't scream when she cums on his cock] Jimmy: shit Jimmy: you should do that more Janis: which part Jimmy: the bit where nobody knew how loud you wanted to be Jimmy: it's gonna be really helpful at school Janis: okay, something to occupy my mouth Janis: noted Jimmy: me though Jimmy: I liked it Jimmy: don't just be putting random school supplies in there Janis: [lols which appaz feels really good js] Janis: okay, also noted Janis: 🤓 so studious Jimmy: also I really fucking like you Jimmy: note that down, nerd Janis: 😏 Janis: write it all over my schoolbooks, obvs Jimmy: my name better be on there Jimmy: are we #goals or not Janis: 'course Janis: anything artsier than that you'll have to do yourself Jimmy: I've already drawn you all over mine Jimmy: but if I can find the space, I'll draw you like you just were Jimmy: 'cause you're that nerd Janis: think you might get in some trouble for that Jimmy: I'm ready to get in trouble for you Jimmy: you know that Janis: I'm ready to do this for as long as we can Jimmy: I'm not stopping unless you beg me to Jimmy: & then its a maybe Janis: fuck me Jimmy: you heard me, I'm gonna Jimmy: if you don't need me to carry you into your house what are we even doing Janis: how are you so Janis: actually feel it almost again already it's not fair how good you are Jimmy: nah, how are you so Jimmy: I want you all the time Janis: it made me wanna die thinking we'd never again Janis: because not only do I love you but I still wanted you so bad too it was Jimmy: don't think about that, baby Jimmy: you don't have to Jimmy: [puts in the work so she won't] Janis: how does he not hear I Janis: even if I'm really good I'm so wet it's so loud Jimmy: I reckon we're gonna owe your brother more than petrol money again, girl Jimmy: at least he's really good at distracting mine Jimmy: not a chat I need to have right now Jimmy: when brother's & their girlfriend's really love each other Janis: [hides her face like she's embarrassed but really just dying] Janis: don't Jimmy: hey, look at me Jimmy: I love you Janis: [cums again whilst making all the eye contact 'cos] Jimmy: [whispers that he loves her again cos can't be tamed now apparently excuse you boy did I consent] Janis: [saying it back again and again 'til it lowkey doesn't make any sense] Jimmy: [and then all the snuggles after cos they are the softest & I can't deal with it] Janis: knew we'd be here too soon Jimmy: don't you want me to carry you in & get you out of all those clothes? Jimmy: properly Janis: were you always this Jimmy: what compliment are you trying to backhand, sweetheart Jimmy: bit rude Janis: shh Janis: i just really want that and i really missed you, is all Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: 'cause same, alright Janis: come on then Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: [does carry her in which makes Twix highkey] Janis: don't trip she's always doing that Jimmy: [has a really cute concentration face on] Janis: 🤤 Janis: baby Jimmy: ? Janis: you're so fucking  cute Janis: continue Jimmy: [continues but then has to put her down cos I ain't letting him carry her all through the house thank you boy you'll hurt yourself] Jimmy: Let me just sort Bob's out & I'll be back with you Janis: 👍 Janis: you know where to find me Jimmy: don't be taking everything off though Jimmy: I said I'd do it Janis: I 🤞 Janis: I want you to Jimmy: I totally read that as 🖕 for a sec Jimmy: bit rude Janis: 😂 Janis: i'm being good, honest Jimmy: easy to say Jimmy: 😈 you Janis: depends how long you have to be Jimmy: time me Jimmy: then you can decide Janis: if you're longer than Janis: 5 minutes Janis: i can be 😈? Jimmy: if that's the #mood Jimmy: not gonna argue Jimmy: can't with a # Janis: so goals always you Jimmy: you're so #blessed Janis: feel it Janis: still Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: [actually is longer than 5 mins tho getting that shy kiddo sorted out but then appears leaning on her door frame like a nerd] Janis: [can't help but lol] Janis: hey handsome Jimmy: pissing yourself laughing ain't the reaction I expected Jimmy: did you get drunk in those few minutes, lightweight? Janis: maybe Janis: but only the fun kind Jimmy: without me Jimmy: bit rude Janis: you were longer than five, technically Janis: so can be as rude as I wanna Jimmy: so you had like a shot a minute? Jimmy: what a lad Janis: you wish Jimmy: not what I'm wishing Jimmy: but go on Janis: are you coming in to tell me all about it or what, nerd Jimmy: [comes in & kisses her] Jimmy: or what, I suppose Janis: [smiles happy af] Janis: I like it Jimmy: [is heart eyes cos her smile is rude] Janis: I really like having you as my boyfriend, you know Jimmy: I really like having you as my girlfriend, you know Jimmy: [takes off the first layer of whatever she's wearing & kisses her all over there so soft] Janis: [is playing with his hair and making all the contented noises she wants] Jimmy: [repeat for every layer, with the kisses getting less soft as we go, until there are none] Janis: [takes off his clothes a lot less soft and considered 'cos damn, her hands roaming all over his body again 'cos damn] Jimmy: [hot naked make out session they finally deserve for a while cos clothes are always a damn issue] Janis: why do you have to wear clothes Janis: it's rude Jimmy: so that you don't 💀💀💀 Janis: so considerate Janis: 💕 Janis: the rest of the world is probably mad at me but Jimmy: nah, I told you, selfish Jimmy: more use to me alive Jimmy: so I want you to stay like it Janis: always good to get it out there that you ain't a necrophile Jimmy: bit rude Jimmy: that ain't all I want you for Jimmy: mostly but there's also the 🐶 Janis: 😂 soz Janis: your intentions are so pure Jimmy: they really ain't Jimmy: not right now Janis: should hope not Janis: [gestures at self] Janis: bit rude, like Jimmy was timed out 2 days ago Jimmy joined the chat 2 days ago Jimmy: [does a lil lol oh these nerds] Janis: you're so Janis: [can't even so is just letting her hands explain] Jimmy: [likewise cos likewise can't even] Janis: we're gonna do this for a while Janis: me and you Janis: right Jimmy: unless you're planning on kicking me out Jimmy: bit rude though Janis: really not what I've got in mind Jimmy: [is doing everything deliberately slowly in like a sexy lingering way cos same & they've got time bitch] Janis: [is enjoying] Janis: stay forever Jimmy: [is also obvs & promises out loud cos he's always doing that] Janis: [kisses and saying missed you again and again 'cos true] Jimmy: [all the kisses everywhere all the time because too in love & too cute] Janis: [use your imagination for however long they're allowed] Jimmy: [I'm giving them time they deserve it & also saying that Grace met Twix and Bobby during & it was cute when she came back to get/do whatever but is now gone again cos we don't need that awks rn] Janis: Miss you alreay Jimmy: [kisses her 'cause misses doing that already extra boy] Jimmy: but not to become your dad's 🥇 I'm so hungry though Janis: 😏 Janis: you actually want something though? Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: gotta stay alive, don't we Janis: [takes his hand and takes him upstairs] Jimmy: [nearly gets tripped over by Twix as standard] Janis: awh, she's missed you too Janis: [gives Twix love 'cos obvs shameless fave] Jimmy: nah she wants me out of the way 🔪 Jimmy: 💀💀💀 Janis: plot of a shit movie that Janis: me like soz I don't see it, she's my bestie Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: don't reckon your brother'll be rushing to make it for the #clout Janis: made weirder Janis: and she has that #starquality Janis: 'gram fame gone to her head, thinks she's an actress Jimmy: & MOST importantly, I've got this face Jimmy: [grins] Janis: [fakes snapping pics like a nerd] Janis: so beautiful Jimmy: [actually does snap a pic of her though 'cause she is] Jimmy: I know Janis: [blush blush] Janis: think he's at work so you'll have to put up with me 💔 Janis: always leftovers though Janis: [gestures at fridge like go for it] Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: [gets his plate of food & is eating it but also gestures that she comes & sits on his lap cos fave thing] Janis: [does even though she's making faux complaints like 'you know it'd be easier to eat otherwise, yeah?' etc] Janis: 👍? Jimmy: [kisses her cos shh but also love you] Jimmy: what the fuck is it though? Jimmy: I can basically remember who you are Jimmy: 👍 Janis: Empadão Janis: 'cos you're predictable and Northern Janis: chicken pie but make it extra [shrugs] Jimmy: [shakes his head but lols a little] Jimmy: say it for me then 'cause you ain't Jimmy: & I'm not learning any paddy lingo am I Janis: [does and any sides he probably has] Jimmy: [is shamelessly heart eyes about it not sorry it's hot thanks for coming through for your kids like that Caleb] Janis: [rolls her eyes but gives him a forehead kiss] Jimmy: [feeds her some of the food cos we all gotta eat babe] Janis: [someone walks in and then out again and she's so moody] Janis: wish I had my own place Jimmy: me too Jimmy: me or you Janis: and a car Jimmy: 👌 I'll steal my dad's stop begging 😏 Janis: as much fun as it'd be to leave it burnt out under some underpass Janis: don't wanna see ian on the bus soz Jimmy: [as if evoked by the mention of his name he rings wanting to know where Bobby is & Jimmy's like with me bitch cos you don't need details thank you] Janis: ✞ Janis: that was sinister Jimmy: have a word with your god please Jimmy: I should probably check on the boy though Jimmy: hold on Janis: yeah, see if they've fed him or what Janis: 👍 Jimmy: [is a while establishing his little bro is living his best life in the Cali gaff] Janis: [is seeing what kid appropriate shit they have anyway 'cos reckons he's probably picky] Jimmy: [brings this little legend into the kitchen & he's chatting SO MUCH ABOUT EVERYTHING like who is he cos normally so shy & quiet] Janis: [is just smiling 'cos nice to see and gets him food he'd like and some shit to try] Jimmy: [Jimothy is also smiling cos he's eating it & not being a baby diva which he normally would] Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: first my 🐶 then my sister & now him, yeah? Jimmy: #yourinfluencebabe Janis: 💁 Janis: take my credit and praise now please and thanks Jimmy: good 'cause you ain't getting no cash from me, rich girl Jimmy: jobless & closer to penniless every sec like Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Janis: 😢 Janis: poor boy Janis: can't even make the most of it now school Jimmy: my own fault Jimmy: I really fucked that interview Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: I didn't exactly help so Janis: you'll get the next one Jimmy: [kisses her cos shhh] Janis: back doing what you 💕 in no time Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: I get it, you really want a smoothie Jimmy: calm down Janis: just don't want Doris to die on hunger strike, like Janis: needs a pot of tea and victoria sponge stat Jimmy: 💕👵 Jimmy: [actually starts making her a smoothie though cos in this kitchen I think so bitch] Janis: can forcibly remove the boy from the CG Janis: 😏 Jimmy: I can forcibly remove you from my work space if you're gonna kick off, girl Jimmy: 💪 Janis: 😂 Janis: not how I remember it but go off Jimmy: [playfight cos it's been so long] Janis: [so domestic 'scuse you fam] Jimmy: [turns into kisses cos he is so in love rn soz but not everybody] Janis: I love you Jimmy: it's gonna be a bit awkward now if you don't Jimmy: [but carries on making the smoothie cos love you too babe] Janis: anything to save from an awkward moment Jimmy: [touches one of the many lovebites he gave her earlier] Jimmy: yeah Janis: you Janis: [blushing, mad about it] Jimmy: me Jimmy: what? Janis: dickhead Janis: [but kisses] Jimmy: I love you too Janis: [has to go sit 'cos can't even deal] Jimmy: what are we doing tonight then Jimmy: out to flaunt it or it to make 'em wish we would Jimmy: in* Janis: we can go out as long as we don't go to any party they could be at Jimmy: easy Jimmy: you're gonna talk to Grace though? Janis: shh Jimmy: I'll set the 🐶 on you Jimmy: or the kid Janis: they both love me rn Janis: do your worst Jimmy: [beckons Bobby over & whispers to him like 'tell her she's gotta do what I say' but when he goes over to Janis he says 'you've gotta do what I say' cos cheeky] Janis: [lols and goes around doing whatever things a six year old can think of] Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: miss you already Janis: mr steal your girl Jimmy: [brings her her smoothie in a bit cos let's say they are in the garden with Twix playing] Jimmy: [but was a while cos he would have cleaned up & everything cos how he living] Jimmy: let's just find a pub we aren't banned from Jimmy: parties are bollocks Janis: [nods 'cos yeah] Janis: sounds good to me Jimmy: 👍 Janis: how do you do this Janis: actually knackering Jimmy: you've met my dad Jimmy: Bobby's a holiday compared to Ian Jimmy: [is giving the dog some 'begrudging' love we see you boy] Jimmy: you can just admit I wore you out, it's alright Janis: fair Janis: he's cute Janis: not Ian Janis: before you start Janis: 😒 because I will admit no such thing either, thank you Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: drink your energy, baby Jimmy: 💕 Janis: [does 'cos loves a smoothie moment] Janis: tah Jimmy: alright? Janis: wasted on the old ladies, babe Jimmy: 👵💔 Jimmy: tweet it, girl Jimmy: Doris'll square up Janis: not afraid Janis: 🥊 Janis: get onboard or leave, bitch Jimmy: protect me then Janis: nah, she'll pine from a distance 💔 Janis: same bitch Jimmy: [kisses her cos shh but soft] Janis: how's it feel being so #wanted, babe? Jimmy: hang on Jimmy: [asks her cos he's a nerd] Janis: [pushes him down so she can lay her head on his stomach and lay in the grass together] Jimmy: you're so Jimmy: hate you a bit Janis: well I need a pillow so hush Janis: just that worn out, yeah? Jimmy: I get it Jimmy: I'm multi-talented Janis: [tickles his belly like shh but love] Jimmy: [is like oi & throws some grass at her like we all used to do at school but loves it really] Janis: [grass fight lmao mature] Jimmy: [but then he gets to play with her hair after cos grass in it so 😍 even though he lost] Janis: gonna be finding that forever now Jimmy: I'll get it 🏆 Jimmy: [blatant excuse to just keep playing with her hair for ages] Janis: 🐒 you Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: [doesn't stop though] Janis: like it Janis: [does] Jimmy: I know Jimmy: you like me Jimmy: always going on about it, you Jimmy: [but kisses her again cos same] Janis: you piss off Janis: 😶 Janis: never say it  now Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: [whispers 'baby please' in a saucy way cos cheeky] Janis: [gives him a stop it look 'cos kills her and sassily turns and gives Twix love] Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: 💀💀💀 Jimmy: [kisses her neck and shoulder so much cos she turned away & he's being annoying] Janis: [can only stay strong for so long before turning back and giving him a long-ass kiss] Janis: kiss of life, you're welcome Jimmy: say it for me Janis: [does but whispers in his ear 'cos being extra enough poor Bobs lol] Jimmy: let's Jimmy: go back to your room Jimmy: for a bit Janis: okay Janis: just Jimmy: help me up Janis: [helps this soft boy] Janis: 💪 Jimmy: 😍😍😍 Jimmy: [actually is looking at her like that lowkey though] Janis: know just how to make me feel #wanted Jimmy: hang on, I ain't started yet Janis: 😏 Janis: promises promises Jimmy: well it weren't gonna be a warning Jimmy: told you, not trying to lure & murder you Jimmy: 💕 Janis: make me not 💔 about that, babe Jimmy: come on Janis: [skip ahead so they're in her room again don't need to be starting before ty] Jimmy: I've got no words left Jimmy: I just Janis: [takes her top off and is maintaining eye contact how they do] Jimmy: [is just looking at her like !! I can't even] Janis: [walks over to him deliberately slowly enjoy boy] Janis: take yours off Jimmy: [does & is also deliberately unf about it] Janis: [kissing down his body 'til she on her knees in front of him like hey] Jimmy: [you know this boy just dying okay damn] Janis: [painfully slow about unbuttoning etc] Jimmy: [is giving her a LOOK like he's so sassy but at the same time has literally stopped breathing so what's the truth Jimothy] Janis: [stops and looks up at him challengingly like 'you want me to stop?'] Jimmy: [looks back at her like girl you better not] Janis: [smirks like 'thought so' and finally, but suddenly, takes him fully into her mouth, moaning with it 'cos wants this as much] Jimmy: [thank god it's only Diego on this floor 'cause obvs he's also being loud & ridiculous about it] Janis: [back to teasing him 'cos gotta, just circling her tongue 'round and 'round and licking up and down like nbd] Jimmy: [is trying to be mad about but can't] Janis: you look really good from this angle Janis: just so you know Jimmy: 📷 me Jimmy: it's been ages since my last social media ban Janis: [lols but does 'cos he do and she wanna keep it so] Jimmy: [is obviously into the fact that she's gonna have that pic of him & makes it known whether he meant to or not] Janis: Get it Janis: nice to be the muse sometimes, yeah? Janis: [goes harder again 'cos poor boy] Jimmy: [says his 'yeah' out loud cos honestly] Janis: [is encouraged] Jimmy: [says her name a lot cos it'll encourage her more] Janis: [says similarly encouraging things back 'cos feeling it and imma let you finish boy] Jimmy: [is very much feeling it as we can imagine] Janis: we don't have time to Janis: do we? Jimmy: we'll make time Jimmy: 🥇 aren't we Janis: you Jimmy: you Jimmy: seriously Janis: [takes whatever she's got on her bottom off too and stands up] Janis: please then Jimmy: [never needs to be told twice so go off kids] Janis: [after snuggling wherever they landed 'cos we know lol] Jimmy: [his dad calls again cos that prick & he don't answer cos busy thank you but like he'd just keep ringing so eventually does] Jimmy: I gotta take this kid back Janis: 👍 Janis: want me to think of somewhere decent and meet you there or am I picking you up at 8 like the gentleman I am Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: do you want me to get lost? Jimmy: 'cause if not you gotta come find me Janis: 👌 Janis: true Janis: can't have a repeat of the cow incident Janis: tell Ian to put the shotgun away then Jimmy: meet me 'round the corner so I don't have to chat to him Jimmy: I reckon I can find my way that far alone Janis: believe in you, babe Janis: [kiss for 🍀] Jimmy: [another really long kiss for bye] Janis: [says ily 'cos she can bitch] Jimmy: [is 😳 & 😍] Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: actually 8 or was that a full pisstake? Janis: whenever you're ready, I'm still her avoiding hoes too so Janis: sooner the better Jimmy: once I get home won't be long Jimmy: just need to shower Jimmy: & make sure Cass is back Jimmy: 'cause he don't give a shit if she's alright or owt 🙄 Janis: 🙄 Janis: and here I was thinking you were father of the year Janis: tragic Jimmy: sort it out Ian Jimmy: you've let yourself down, Leprechaun town down & most importantly your son's missus Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Janis: fully #teambobby now Janis: 🤷 Jimmy: reckoned you were only team 🐶 Janis: I'm very mysterious Janis: gotta keep you 🤔 Jimmy: I already know you chat shit Jimmy: it's alright Janis: 😒 Jimmy: 🤞 I get our fave bus bloke & can keep him 🤔 Janis: gonna know that kid ain't mine for sure Jimmy: got your freckles though Jimmy: #whatsthetruth Janis: 😂 Janis: you're a nerd Jimmy: I'm saying I don't know where else they came from, girl Jimmy: take the credit Janis: maybe if that didn't mean Janis: 🤢🤢 Ian Jimmy: I get it, but he might not be his dad Jimmy: my mum ain't around to ask Janis: you two look alike though Janis: either her DNA 💪 or he sadly is Jimmy: if you tell me I look like my dad I'm dumping you Janis: if you did, you wouldn't ave anyone to dump Jimmy: touche Janis: 👍 Janis: fancy Jimmy: sometimes we use big words in the north Janis: I know Janis: 🍀 to have heard your way with words, boy Jimmy: don't be trying to make me 😳 at the bus stop Janis: but you wanna look cute for your man Jimmy: but he thinks I'm so 😎💪 Jimmy: let me have this one thing, girl, come on Janis: I'm selfish though Janis: don't act like you didn't know Jimmy: I like it Jimmy: don't act like you didn't know Janis: now who's trying to make who 😳 Jimmy: not trying but if you do 📷 it Janis: get you 😎💪 Janis: I'm so busy and important rn soz I can't Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Jimmy: I'll just be busy missing you so much then Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Janis: teach my sister a thing or two about a guilt trip, babe Janis: much better at it Jimmy: hang on, I'll hit her up Jimmy: since you're so busy Jimmy: 👍 Janis: shut up 🙄 Jimmy: alright Jimmy: 🎨 to do anyways can't let Bob outshine me 🏆 Janis: you are gonna have to up your game 'cos 🥇 that Jimmy: 😱😱😱 Jimmy: #sheusedtosaythataboutme Jimmy: #storytime Janis: 😏 Janis: collab with gracieguru but i never did 'bout her so lies, babes Jimmy: actually 💔 me that Jimmy: Grace come & console me, girl Janis: you're the worst Jimmy: 🥇 to the worst in how many minutes? Jimmy: 💪🏆 Jimmy: #goals Janis: i'm ingorning you and pretending i need to get ready Janis: good day Jimmy: now that's a collab with your sister Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: it don't take that long to stick on some lashes I ain't having it Jimmy: I'll hit my ex up for the #truth, Gracie, come on Janis: 🤢 Janis: she'd probably hit you with a #dontwastegoodlashesonabadguy but i ain't gonna waste my breath on that, no tah Jimmy: 😂 Janis: probably should shower though, only fair if you are Janis: #polite Jimmy: I don't care if you don't wanna Jimmy: It's the one place I can't hear my dad having a go at me though so I'm committed Janis: 👍 Janis: I feel it Janis: have to lock the door and some of these fuckers might still be banging to be let in but Janis: piss in the garden or hold it 😘 Jimmy: how many bathrooms have you got, rich girl? Jimmy: I know it ain't just the one Janis: 5 Janis: but at the worst, we had over double that in people so it's not as luxurious as it could be Janis: plus they just got boundary issues, you can tell Jimmy: I've met Grace, yeah Jimmy: tried to be sick on me one convo deep Janis: exactly Janis: and you didn't share a womb with her so Jimmy: but we're still a bathroom for 4 so I don't feel sorry for you Jimmy: 5 if my dad's feeling 💕 Janis: 🤷 Janis: damn Janis: all I needed you for Janis: bye, like Jimmy: stick some classic FM on babe, you'll be alright Jimmy: maybe go say hi to Pete Jimmy: I miss him so much 💔 Janis: same 💔 Janis: I need to know what he's doing with his life Janis: so many unanswered questions Jimmy: OMG you should invite him out tonight, honey Jimmy: 😍😍😍 Jimmy: #getyourman Janis: 😖 what if he don't remember me Janis: I'll straight up DIE Jimmy: babe you know you're unforgettable Janis: 🙈🙈🙈 Janis: such a good friend Jimmy: duh Janis: 💖 Janis: wanna get matching tattoos Jimmy: obvs! Jimmy: what do you wanna get? Jimmy: 🦋 or infinity symbol Janis: 🤔 Janis: such a hard decision Janis: all I know is I'm getting it on my ass Jimmy: I'm getting it on my wrist Jimmy: gotta Janis: 😬 Janis: #whenyourbestieisabasicbitch Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Janis: soz babes but someone had to say it Janis: saving you from how much everyone would drag you Jimmy: 👌 I love you again Jimmy: tah babes Jimmy: 💖💖💖 Janis: 😘 wanna have a sleepover? Jimmy: I don't have to fake that enthusiasm Jimmy: I really do Janis: duh Janis: me too Janis: can't be too mad, no church and no school tomorrow so 👍😇 Jimmy: did you have a word with your god yet? Jimmy: maybe wait for a bit Janis: I ain't putting my sunday best on for you either Janis: be more blatant that you wanna change me Janis: 😭 Jimmy: as long as you've got your skirt on for Monday, I forgive you Jimmy: be that nice to me Jimmy: please Janis: I wanna because you're gonna be even nicer to me, yeah? Jimmy: yeah Janis: 🤤 brb Jimmy: 😘 Janis: School's been so fucking shit without you Janis: more than normal Jimmy: you ain't even been there since the start Jimmy: it was Jimmy: it is but Janis: yeah that must've been Janis: sorry Jimmy: just Jimmy: if you're sick or something let me know Jimmy: 'cause I ain't going Janis: deal Jimmy: 👍 Janis: 💪 immune system but don't tell the teachers 'cos love a sickie Jimmy: gimme an invite & I'll shut up Jimmy: maybe Janis: dunno if I wanna hang w a grass, boy Janis: 'less you gonna look after me Jimmy: you know it Janis: pretend i took more convincing Jimmy: that's what we'll say Jimmy: promise Janis: 👌 Janis: you're the best, actual Jimmy: you Janis: you you you Jimmy: you're gonna make me 😳 for real Jimmy: stop Janis: soz, being annoying and I know it but Janis: I just Janis: I'm glad you're back Janis: I'm back, I guess Jimmy: it's not annoying Jimmy: you're Jimmy: doing your job as muse right now, I suppose Jimmy: & I'm glad Jimmy: but also Jimmy: you could be closer Jimmy: so I just Janis: I will be Janis: tonight Janis: whenever you want, I'm not going anywhere Jimmy: good Jimmy: stay Janis: you too Jimmy: alright Janis: alright that you will, yeah? Jimmy: I will Janis: good Janis: me too Jimmy: so where we going Jimmy: you sorted that yet Janis: keen 😉 Janis: sure Janis: I know lots of places Jimmy: you're keen Jimmy: I'm just asking Janis: obvs Janis: pisshead, ain't I? Janis: not about you, mate Jimmy: I got that Jimmy: could be anyone, me Janis: mhmm Janis: #thathoelife Janis: how many lads did I fit into a week again? Jimmy: 100s Janis: that high, best to be vague Jimmy: sounds more impressive than 101 or 2 Jimmy: just a weird number that Janis: oh now it's not good enough Janis: get back out there asap Jimmy: nowt's as impressive as me having Mia round for a quiet night in Jimmy: ain't my fault Janis: know that ain't true Janis: be having 👻 chat rn Jimmy: it is, she's just a really horny mute & I'm that 💪 Janis: 🖕 Janis: go get eaten, Taylor Jimmy: can't, one night with me & she's a changed lass Janis: 🙄 Janis: made her all bark no bite? Janis: boring Jimmy: her being boring's nowt to do with me Janis: 👌 Janis: convenient Jimmy: nah really inconvenient Jimmy: hoping for a 🐍 & got a 🐛 Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Janis: not sorry for you, babe Jimmy: come on Jimmy: be 💔 for me Janis: 🤖 Jimmy: gimme at least 1 🎻 Janis: 🎺 Janis: how buzzin' I am you had a shit time Jimmy was timed out 36 hours ago Jimmy joined the chat 36 hours ago Jimmy: add a 🍆 & you've got it Jimmy: 💔💔 Janis: 😑 you aren't funny Jimmy: a bit Janis: a lot of a dickhead though Janis: have that Jimmy: don't matter Jimmy: you like it Janis: perhaps Jimmy: I won't say owt to anybody don't worry Jimmy: this 🎨 will do the job Janis: yeah? cool but save your words for me, romeo Jimmy: I love you, alright Janis: eurgh 😉 Janis: shut up love you too Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: shutting up now Janis: you on the bus yeah Janis: already bored without you Jimmy: [sends a selfie of him & Bob's with Twix sitting in his backpack] Janis: 😍 Jimmy: tried to shove the boy in too but he wouldn't go Jimmy: getting too big 🙄 Janis: 💔 Janis: get one for that Jimmy: gimme a 🎻 though Jimmy: we're dancing here Janis: 'course, nerds Janis: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: he needs to hurry up & grow so he can just come to the pub with us Jimmy: then a shower with you & I'd have been good to go Janis: really worried you were suggesting he get in the shower too but I'm with you Jimmy: make it weird, girl Jimmy: it's been a bit Jimmy: since you were Janis: 'scuse me, when was I weird? Jimmy: how far back we going on it babe Janis: 😱 Janis: just today, can't handle any more than that tah, so fragile Jimmy: today 🤔🤔? Jimmy: that'd be every second then Jimmy: 💕 Janis: so rude Janis: if I wasn't you would have had a way more boring time so appreciate, thanks 💕 Jimmy: I am Jimmy: take the compliment, dickhead Janis: 😏 Janis: next job you get can they also give you boyfriend training Jimmy: I get it, trying to get outta that like you do with the 🐶 Janis: I think you'll find it's called delegating Jimmy: that sounds like a paddy excuse Jimmy: in the north we call it pissing about Janis: hmm, what makes you sure I'm up to the job with you if you also reckon I'm crap with the 🐶? Jimmy: if I answer that you're gonna 😳 again Jimmy: & anyway don't do that with questions, do I Janis: True enough Janis: gutting though it is Jimmy: you want me to chat or shut up? Jimmy: make your mind up like Janis: can't I have it both ways? #UGH #BOYS Jimmy: nightmare you Janis: I know 😘 Jimmy: what are you even doing right, layabout Jimmy: sort it out Jimmy: now* Janis: thinking 'bout you, dickhead Janis: my god given right think you'll find Jimmy: don't say that if you're only taking the piss Jimmy: 'cause now I'm thinking about you thinking about me Jimmy: & Janis: I ain't Janis: you had to leave too soon Janis: I think about you a lot Jimmy: I'm about to take over this bus like I'm in a shit action flick & turn it around Jimmy: I Jimmy: I want you a lot Janis: hot 😂 Janis: your GTA fetish becomes more and more obvious Janis: but I still want you more so Jimmy: I told you, Ian hates women Jimmy: & he's such a hands on parent Jimmy: ain't my fault I been raised on those mean streets Janis: s'cool Janis: we can kill hookers together Jimmy: #truelove Jimmy: muscle him out of the father son bonding activity 🏆💪 love that Janis: just that bitch 🤷 Janis: nice of him to take on that one motherly role, usually the woman like you ain't good enough for my baby boy Janis: 10/10 Ian Jimmy: so clingy you Jimmy: well it's his fault I ain't got one, only fair Janis: can you blame me? look at you Janis: exactly Jimmy: 😍😍😍 I get it Jimmy: I told you, I'm a good boyfriend Janis: too good Jimmy: you need to deal with that Jimmy: 'cause I ain't stopping Janis: yeah, you want me to? Janis: challenge accepted Jimmy: get used to me, girl Jimmy: I know I'm really 😎💪 but don't be intimidated Jimmy: you're alright too, for a girl Janis: never Janis: like how new you are Janis: know that's your #appeal Jimmy: fine I'll leave & come back so I'm the new boy again Jimmy: no need to beg Janis: you've already left, babe Janis: like the first time Jimmy: but maybe I gotta leave Leprechaun land Jimmy: bump up my #appeal Janis: no Jimmy: gotta get off this bus though Janis: I'll allow that Jimmy: 👌 Janis: any further than that you gotta gimme more warning so I can Jimmy: you can come with me Jimmy: you know Janis: where are we going? Jimmy: it don't matter Jimmy: you can come with me wherever Janis: you aren't bullshitting me Janis: swear Jimmy: I'm not Janis: Good Janis: we'll do it Jimmy: where do you wanna go? Janis: I don't care Jimmy: easy then Janis: anywhere a long way from here Janis: got family in london and nyc though so certain neighbourhoods we'd have to avoid Jimmy: fine by me Janis: 👍 Jimmy: how long do dogs live 'cause it's been enough bollocks having her on this bus for a bit Janis: she could go for another 10-15 easy Janis: you gonna show up when I'm boring and married and be like pack your bags is it Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: see if you've forgot about me Jimmy: but if you've got kids they ain't coming Janis: soz darlings, deal's a deal Jimmy: just don't marry that lift lad, alright Janis: do my best Janis: obvs wanna be mrs pete but who knows what'll happen, babe Jimmy: I told you, I saw him first Janis: well he 👀s me Janis: 🥊 you for him Jimmy: any time any place Janis: my imaginary children's lives depend on it so Janis: stand no chance, boy Jimmy: you ain't having any you said Janis: who am I to deny the world how cute pete's offspring would be Janis: anyway, in this pretend scenario also married and boring, both of which ain't ever happening either so roll with it Jimmy: you could just let him have them with the one he's with now Jimmy: be smart about it Janis: doubt she's as cute as me Jimmy: but come on Jimmy: that body Jimmy: you're gonna ruin it Janis: have you seen my ma Janis: #geneticallyblessed Janis: he don't need to have 10 either Jimmy: give him twins Jimmy: you'd be about that Janis: 😑 Janis: horror movie where the ptsd kicks in and i have to murder one like not again Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: your brother would make that Janis: 🤞ask grace to be in it, lad Janis: she'll 😭 Jimmy: can she cry on cue or what the fuck is it Janis: nothing useful like that Janis: it's just her natural state of being Jimmy: I get it, she's allergic to Mia Jimmy: #same Janis: allergic to her own bullshit more like Janis: or her expensive mascara, awks Jimmy: can I use the excuse that I'm allergic to my dad's Jimmy: either his girlfriend's mascara or his bullshit, don't matter Jimmy: just gotta quarantine myself Janis: can I visit? Jimmy: you have to Jimmy: can't nurse myself Janis: not that I'm amazing at it Janis: kept forgetting about your poor lip Jimmy: who the fuck has entered this chat Jimmy: 'cause you ain't never admitted to being less than 🥇 at owt ever Janis: 😏 shh Janis: not my fault you looked 🥇 Jimmy: & I forget about it any time you touch me so Janis: I really missed you Janis: not done showing you Jimmy: I miss you now Jimmy: so don't be Janis: ain't Janis: between that and how sorry I am, got so much to show you Jimmy: you're so sorry, aren't you? Jimmy: me too Janis: yes Janis: why are you sorry, babe Jimmy: it was my fault too Jimmy: I've gotta do my bit to make it up to you Janis: nah Janis: not gonna complain about that though Jimmy: 👍 Janis: you'r Janis: e Jimmy: what do you wanna say, baby? Janis: fuck Janis: just Janis: tell me when you're home, I wanna shower with you Jimmy: not far now Janis: okay Jimmy: I finished my masterpiece for you Janis: do I get a preview? Jimmy: do you want one? Janis: yes Jimmy: [gets what she wants of course] Janis: oh Janis: that's Janis: dead good Jimmy: you can have it Jimmy: in case you feel like you can't stay Janis: I'm gonna, promise Janis: but thanks Janis: I want it Jimmy: if you do stick around maybe you'll inspire me to draw you how you look Jimmy: 'cause I can't Jimmy: you're just Janis: but I can feel how it felt Janis: idk Janis: don't come for me, not an art critic Jimmy: but you're the only one who I give a shit about Janis: it's good, you're good Janis: trust me Jimmy: you are Jimmy: & I do Janis: ruining my rep tho Janis: got me feeling some type of way Jimmy: that rep should be ruined Jimmy: it's bollocks Janis: go hard then, babe Janis: doing a pretty 💪 job, like Jimmy: & I'm home Jimmy: so let's do more Janis: thought you'd never ask Janis: felt like the longest bus journey ever Jimmy: it was Jimmy: let me just check Cass ain't been impregnated by her boy mate Jimmy: hang on Janis: eurgh babe Jimmy: I'm not gonna do a physical one Jimmy: calm down Jimmy: simple yeah or nah Janis: such a dad Janis: poor cass Jimmy: shut up Jimmy: I weren't fucking when I was 12 Jimmy: won't kill her Janis: obviously but having this convo with you might Jimmy: I'll leave it for Ian, then she'll kill him Jimmy: job done Janis: exactly Janis: that's what parents, even shit ones, are for Jimmy: get in the shower Janis: damn Janis: not saying please now Jimmy: alright Jimmy: get in the shower please Janis: 👌 Janis: was going before you asked nicely Jimmy: & now I have what are you gonna do? Janis: wanna facetime Jimmy: do you? Janis: yes Janis: obviously Jimmy: then yeah, obviously Jimmy: go on Janis: [calls 'cos like my boo said phones are defs waterproof] Jimmy: [I'm just imagining his dad banging on the door cos in there forever lol] Janis: [suck it Ian, also later] Janis: lurking 'round your ends Janis: hurry up Jimmy: since you asked nicely Jimmy: [comes out with unlit 🚬 already in his mouth cos been with Bobby for an age but doesn't light up until he gets to where she is in case she wants one #whipped] Janis: [gives him a saucy 'that good?' look 'cos you know] Jimmy: [lols but is giving her a LOOK cos yes we know it was] Janis: [puts hands out like Oliver for a 🚬 'cos dork] Jimmy: [takes it out of his mouth & puts it in hers, lights it for her cos nice like that] Janis: [takes a drag then kisses him on the cheek] Jimmy: what's that for? Janis: 🚬 Janis: obvs Janis: and you know Jimmy: 💕 Janis: [fake cuffs him on the chin like shut up] Jimmy: [is all like oi & fake fighting her back like a cute nerd] Janis: don't get us kicked out 'fore we're even in, boy Janis: behave Jimmy: I'll screenshot that later when you're begging me not to Jimmy: even if it gets us kicked out Janis: psh Janis: please Jimmy: starting already look Janis: pisstake, you Janis: [walks faster but only a bit don't need that drama already] Jimmy: [pulls her back and kisses her cos he's that extra & hot & they can't kiss on facetime so] Jimmy: I'm what Jimmy: try again Janis: [casually can't breathe like boy] Janis: you're sucha pisstake, babe Jimmy joined the chat 31 hours ago Jimmy: [looks at her like 'excuse you, what' & then goes even harder kissing her again] Janis: [when you gotta stop but you don't wanna stop] Janis: okay, I like it though, you caught me Jimmy: okay Jimmy: [is smirking like] Janis: [nudges] Janis: bighead Jimmy: [nudges her back] Jimmy: you like it too though Jimmy: 😍 you Janis: err not a get out of jail free card to be the biggest dickhead you can be Janis: [is smiling tho] Jimmy: that sounds like a challenge to me, babe Jimmy: [is doing a cheeky grin back] Janis: what doesn't to you, boy Janis: tryna come for my 🥇 Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt Jimmy: always saying it, me Janis: are you? 🤔 Janis: hold on think I've got the wrong lad here Jimmy: [kisses her like its a goodbye vibe cos nerd] Jimmy: on you go then Janis: 😖 Janis: but Janis: maybe I wanna stay Jimmy: [gives her a look like 'only maybe?' and a little make out session ensues] Janis: [says definitely 'cos] Jimmy: [says ILY out loud cos] Janis: [druuuuuuuuuunk in love says it back and more smooching you know focus lads] Jimmy: [let them just have some moments of being able to kiss and be alone but like then imagine someone walks past like aaaayyyy! how people do] Janis: 😒 Jimmy: 🥊 Janis: weren't me Janis: not a ventriloquist Jimmy: not an idiot Jimmy: I meant beat the shit of him for us Jimmy: you and emojis Janis: risk this face? Janis: yours is already battered so Jimmy: don't you wanna twin with me? Jimmy: gutted 💔 Janis: don't ever use the T word ever again Jimmy: or what? Jimmy: you gonna smack me, girl Janis: don't be a twat Jimmy: how? Jimmy: I am what I am Janis: have to keep training you won't I Janis: [pats his head] Jimmy: good thing I ain't going nowhere then Jimmy: with your track record it'll take ages Jimmy: if ever Janis: actually rude Janis: gonna have her dancing on your grave like a showdog Janis: 🖕 Jimmy: pissing up the stone more like Jimmy: & she could do that now Janis: could she write FUCK U though Janis: I think not Janis: wait and see 👻 boy Jimmy: better hold my breath Jimmy: if you want me 💀 Janis: [puts her hand over his mouth then does that thing where you kiss it] Janis: 💕 rip Jimmy: what am I on about? don't need to do nowt me Jimmy: you kill me Jimmy: you're Janis: [looks at him all smug and smiley] Janis: you too Jimmy: [kisses her on that smug little face] Janis: now Janis: I got 2 plans Janis: depends if you really wanna see bus driver again or if you'd rather walk, promising I won't fuck off later and lose ya Jimmy: if you want me to get on that bus again you better have a fucking good plan Jimmy: for when we are & where we're going Janis: 😂 Janis: not as much hassle as a puppy and a six year old, so bit rude Janis: but we'll go with plan b Janis: keep walking, boyo Jimmy: 👍 Janis: don't lemme get as pissed tonight, tah Jimmy: you? nah Jimmy: never have been since I've known you like Janis: funny Janis: should quit school become a full-time 🤡 you Jimmy: I'll get your sister's mates to do my makeup Jimmy: it's alright, pisshead Jimmy: I'll look after you Janis: need that 💰 obvs Jimmy: 🤑 Janis: can't be downgrading Janis: how am I gony pay for my ponies Jimmy: more importantly, how you gonna brag on the 'gram Janis: honestly Janis: keep it fresh and #goals Janis: though can ride the seclusion wave for a bit, I reckon Jimmy: yeah? Janis: yeah Janis: keep getting random bitches coming up to me telling me how 🍀 I am Janis: welcome for the ego boost Jimmy: bit rude that they ain't been since I asked you out Jimmy: sort it out, lasses Janis: 😂 oh soz, sure the fan club meets weekly Janis: dickhead Jimmy: you know you feel it Jimmy: come on Jimmy: [gives her another REALLY good kiss] Janis: 👑 of the club, me, yeah 😏 Janis: could say something nice about me, not telling you how to do your job or nothing but Jimmy: [whispers some nice things about her in her ear & does the lobe thing cos we just gotta] Janis: [😳 emoji] Jimmy: job done? Janis: not even close Janis: [more smooching] Jimmy: so is plan b just this? Jimmy: only asking, not complaining Janis: you wish Janis: keep walking, boy Jimmy: maybe I do, girl Jimmy: [keeps walking though] Janis: later Janis: sleepover, remember Jimmy: won't forget, don't worry Janis: good Janis: didn't buy face masks for nothing, bitch Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: keep it #goals Janis: they'd love that 🙄 Janis: so woke of you to drop all that manly man toxic masculinity, like Jimmy: I'll pick it up later when the fans need me to be jealous & fight a lad or whatever it's alright Jimmy: do & have it all, me Janis: is that so Jimmy: you don't reckon? Jimmy: bit rude Janis: just saying Janis: keep being a knobhead and only thing you'll be doing is yourself Janis: [winks and sashshays away] Jimmy: tah for letting me know Jimmy: you gonna wingman me at the pub to find a new girl to chat shit to Jimmy: or am I proper on my own to try my luck Janis: not a miracle worker, babe Janis: bore the pants off some bitch in your own time t Jimmy: 👌 got loads while I'm unemployed Janis: 😒 Janis: remember who helped get you fired Jimmy: how could I forget? Jimmy: I hope I get fired for that kinda conduct every time Janis: probably not the rep you want on your CV but Jimmy: 🤞 whatever girl I find tonight ain't too boring Jimmy: 'cause I'm gonna get a new job soon Janis: shut up Jimmy: make me Janis: I'm not kissing you Janis: [overacting faux huffy but is also lowkey jealous 'cos always] Jimmy: what are you gonna do then? Jimmy: make a 😒 face 'til we get there? Jimmy: [lights another 🚬 'cause overacting that he ain't bothered] Janis: make a 😒 face all the way home Janis: see where night takes me Jimmy: shut up Jimmy: you know where the night's taking you Jimmy: [pulls her into his arms like, 'right here is where'] Janis: ['truce?'] Jimmy: [snuggles & then offers her the 🚬 cos that is a truce mood] Janis: [kissing and passing the 🚬 back and forth 'til it's finished 'cos kinda hot] Jimmy: [#goals actually am I right lads? then handholding cos they gotta keep walking or they'll never get there] Janis: oh fyi though Janis: can't bang me in this pub alright Jimmy: now you tell me Jimmy: 💔 Janis: I know Janis: false pretenses much Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Janis: poor boy Jimmy: we're not in there yet Jimmy: how long have I got Janis: 😂 shh Jimmy: not an answer that Janis: be 😇 baby Janis: this walk should not take this long as is Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Janis: me too baby me too Janis: maybe in the bathroom if you're quiet Janis: which you never are 😏 Jimmy: which is your fault Janis: not my fault you're so Jimmy: you're so Jimmy: that is your fault Janis: [back at it again] Jimmy: [is loud rn as proof that it's your fault for being the #dream Janis] Janis: how are we ever gonna get anything done Janis: so distracting Jimmy: I don't wanna do anything else Jimmy: I don't care Janis: yeah Janis: feel it Janis: do you reckon those old couples that you think are dead boring 'cos they just stay in all the time are just like fucking 24/7 Janis: maybe that's the truth Jimmy: let me know when it's you & Pete 💕 Janis: 😂 Janis: if I can find the time Jimmy: yeah don't call me while he's still going at you Jimmy: bit rude Janis: 💔 or 🤤 Janis: 👀 you, perv Jimmy: 😂 Janis: so like you Janis: after all this time just to steal my man Jimmy: I reckoned you were gonna say how like me not to answer Janis: I mean, valid Janis: but your thirst for pete doesn't need to be explained Janis: so blatant Jimmy: don't say thirst when I met him at the CG Janis: mhmm, there's a fanfic title in there somewhere Janis: been easier to fake date him to put the girls off but the 💕 was too real Jimmy: why didn't I think of that? Jimmy: fuck Jimmy: 🎻🎻💔🎻 Jimmy: girl you gotta go, soz Jimmy: in my way Janis: 🥊 you for him duh Janis: or you want me to let you win again? 😉 Jimmy: if it means I get Pete Jimmy: go on Janis: no Janis: down to stand in the way of true love soz not soz Jimmy: like I said, nightmare you Janis: your worst, babe Jimmy: gotta be 🥇 always Jimmy: I get it Janis: mhmm Janis: just getting over how mad I am at Grace for popping out 1st Janis: if you wanna be my therapist about it Jimmy: how much you gonna pay me, rich girl? Janis: tell me something I DON'T know already and I might give you something Jimmy: about you? Janis: that's what therapy is Janis: not a pub quiz 🤓 Jimmy: you're so in touch with yourself though Jimmy: don't reckon I can Janis: that's why I don't go motherfuckers Janis: no life-fixing realizations no dough Jimmy: just no cash my end Jimmy: gotta stay a mess Jimmy: 👍 Janis: 💔 Janis: selfishly works for me Janis: don't go spending that first new paycheck on sorting your life alright Jimmy: alright Janis: stay fucked with me for a while Jimmy: [promises out loud cos always a thing now] Janis: [skip them there 'cos honestly] Jimmy: what you drinking then, lightweight? Janis: that thing we had first time Janis: forgot the name, not already pissed Jimmy: 👌 hang on Jimmy: [goes to get 'em] Janis: [checking out the booty also checking Fearghal won't embarrass her lmao] Jimmy: stop staring at me Jimmy: I can feel it Janis: but you 👌 Jimmy: am I okay or I look okay what are you chatting? Janis: 😂 Janis: you look it Janis: but I meant more than okay 'fore you get pouty Jimmy: how good did you mean Janis: got caught staring didn't I? Jimmy: 'bout the 🍺 that though Janis: 💉💉 need my fix Janis: you stupid, good thing you cute too Jimmy: should I have dropped 💊 in it Jimmy: soz Janis: 🤔 reckon you ain't meant to let the girl in on that, babe Jimmy: that's what I've been doing wrong Jimmy: tah babe Janis: keep it between you and the barman, like #ladsladslads Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: he's giving me the eye too Jimmy: where you brought me, girl? Janis: 😂 you mean you aren't used to it, with your mass-appeal? Jimmy: I didn't say I weren't about it Jimmy: 👴💕 Janis: [is lowkey trying to not actually lol at the table] Jimmy: [brings the drinks over & kisses her on the cheek like she did to him earlier] Janis: [wipes it away like a child 'cos you know granddad be looking lmao] Janis: gimme gimme Jimmy was timed out 10 hours ago Jimmy joined the chat 10 hours ago Jimmy: [looks at as if to say 'bit rude' cos she wiped the kiss away but doesn't say anything actually] Jimmy: just don't down this one, like Janis: 👍 alright, dad Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: you told me not to let you get as drunk Janis: [footsie] Janis: you cute Jimmy: you Janis: when's your next interview then Jimmy: week away Janis: you'll get that one Jimmy: I gotta Janis: your da losing his shit yeah Janis: [touches his lip] Jimmy: [nods but then shrugs cos can't show how much you give a shit even though she knows how soft you are] Janis: ['prick' in reference to Ian obvs and dranks her drank letting him be quiet for a bit] Jimmy: [clinks his glass against hers cos he agrees & then likewise just having a little drink moment] Janis: and don't lie, you're missing making all those specific as fuck orders for all the basics Jimmy: busted Jimmy: you got me, girl Jimmy: 💔 bout the lack of frappes in my life right now me Janis: knew it Janis: can make me one if you like Janis: bit of roleplaying Jimmy: #truelove Janis: keeping the romance alive 'fore you really have to seek Mia out Janis: more chance of me drinking the shit we all see you, babe Jimmy: it'd be a way to get rid of her when I touch her & she crumbles to dust but Janis: know you're down to take that bullet for us all but no tah Janis: can't have her dying happy Jimmy: she'd only die happy if you took that honor for the team, babe Jimmy: 💕 Janis: [is loling so Indie can walk in like WHAT YOU LAUGHING BOUT] Jimmy: [& he's heart eyes cos she so cute when she's happy so Indie would also notice that like] Jimmy: [also we need to take a moment to appreciate how fucking good Indie would look cos would've come on a proper motorbike now she's old enough & has that same Janis style mood & is happy cos Drew not about & she's more grown etc so it'd be a mood & Jimmy would totally think she was fit] Janis: [after they've chatted for a bit 'cos don't outstay your welcome babe] Jimmy: [okay but imagine Jimmy actually chatting to Indie and Janis is like !!?? cos he's an antisocial sod who don't like nobody] Janis: ooh Janis: social 🦋 Janis: decided the tat for you Jimmy: what are you on about? Janis: you know Janis: so chatty Janis: can't take you anywhere 😏 Jimmy: she's your mate Jimmy: not gonna be a dickhead Janis: Suuuure Jimmy: [kicks her playfully cos she did footsie before] Jimmy: shut up Janis: see, don't wanna chat to me Janis: see myself out Janis: [kicks back also playful obvs] Jimmy: see yourself to the bar & get us more drinks Janis: such a charmer how could I refuse? Janis: [gets up] Janis: btw tho, can't ask her out or your breaking girl code, soz Jimmy: [blows her a kiss once she's up cos he's silly] Jimmy: I'm a lad, can do what I like 👌 Janis: [does fake daggers from the bar] Janis: nope Janis: she's basically my sister, not being grace about it Jimmy: It ain't my fault you've got loads of hot sisters Janis: 🖕 Janis: too bad you fucked up Janis: don't get to go for the set Jimmy: she can tell me I can't Jimmy: or that lad she's with could try Jimmy: maybe Janis: not gonna be a dickhead he says Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: to her Jimmy: you love it Janis: 😑 Janis: do I Jimmy: [gets up, walks over to her & kisses her cos yeah you do babe so excuse me granddad] Janis: [dies of 😳] Janis: you wanna be wearing this drink instead, like Jimmy: do you wanna get me out of these clothes Jimmy: 'cause you can just ask Jimmy: keep the 🍺 for drinking Janis: shut up Janis: god Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [back with the drinks] Janis: you're just Jimmy: [is just looking at her with an eyebrow raised like what? cos he ain't gonna reply cos she said shh & he's a nerd] Janis: you're testing me boy Janis: drink your drink Jimmy: [takes a sassy sip] Janis: Iggy said Bobby's welcome back any time, btw Jimmy: he'll be chuffed to bits Janis: think he had a good time, yeah? Jimmy: he ain't shut up about it Janis: awh Janis: takes after you Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: I'm doing my best horny mute impression right now for you Janis: had noticed Janis: just savouring the moment Janis: [hehehe lizard] Jimmy: go on Jimmy: [drinks] Janis: [lets it continue for a bit] Janis: k miss you now Jimmy: okay, do something about it Janis: [kisses 'cos happened now hasn't it] Jimmy: so you love me again Jimmy: now what? Janis: you love me again Janis: then maybe 🚬 'cos they're being annoying Jimmy: [kisses her again much to Indie's delight] Janis: [drags him outside which doesn't look suspect at all lol k] Janis: soz Janis: she's a lot Jimmy: Grace is a lot Jimmy: she's Jimmy: 😎 Janis: [😒] Jimmy: what's that face for? Jimmy: I'm saying don't worry about it Jimmy: it's alright Jimmy: she's alright, like Janis: you gonna light up or nah Jimmy: you gonna be nice or nah Jimmy: [but does] Janis: [does shh finger to lips and takes it] Jimmy: make your mind up, girl Jimmy: you wanted me to shut up, then nah, now you do again Jimmy: bit rude Janis: told you was keeping it fresh Janis: [holds 🚬 out] Jimmy: [let them pass it between them for a bit] Janis: maybe we'll go somewhere else Jimmy: she's getting to you that much Jimmy: we can stay out here, you know Janis: nah it's just Janis: it don't matter Jimmy: if it does matter Jimmy: you can say it to me Janis: you'll reckon it's stupid and I already know it is Jimmy: [puts his arms around her cos love while shaking his head] Janis: it's just Janis: people reckoning they know me all the time Janis: gets on my nerves Jimmy: but you said she's basically your sister, yeah Jimmy: don't she know you a bit Jimmy: ? Janis: what's that count for Janis: grace is my actual sister and she don't know me fuck all Jimmy: but Grace is a one off in the opposite way that you're a one off, babe Janis: [shakes her head] Janis: nah Jimmy: none of 'em know you then Jimmy: that's what you're saying Janis: yeah Janis: you think your dad knows you? Jimmy: I don't care Jimmy: I don't want him to know me Janis: exactly Jimmy: you wanna go? Janis: dunno Janis: just give me a sec Jimmy: alright Janis: you go in Jimmy: but Jimmy: you're coming back Janis: I'm not gonna just fuck off Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: [goes in] Janis: [has moment outside Jimmy: [is playing pool with Indie cos she would've asked him when he's standing around like a spare part] Janis: [comes back in like she's unphased now even though obvs not an issue we're resolving today is it lads, makes herself busy and gets drinks and goes loo etc] Jimmy: come take my shot Jimmy: she's beating me Janis: 👌 Janis: [does so lowkey buzzin he's not forgotten about her like oh girl] Jimmy: keep it 🥇 babe Jimmy: it's your fault I'm 🥈 right now Jimmy: distracting me by walking in like that Janis: we can pretend that's what it was, babe Janis: show me up too if not 😉 Jimmy: I'm pretending nowt Jimmy: 😍😍😍 Jimmy: bit rude of you to look so fucking Janis: now who's being distracting Janis: tryna line up my shot here Janis: ['cos that is hot] Jimmy: falling on the sword ready for when you fuck it up Jimmy: #truelove Jimmy: 💕 Janis: you wish any girl here was making your efforts look better baby 💕 Jimmy: you wish I needed that Jimmy: 🏆💪 me Janis: 👑🍀 me Jimmy: prove it Janis: [duh] Jimmy: [is actually 😍😍😍 now cos looking hot & being impressive] Janis: [does bow 'cos nerd] Jimmy: [gestures that he wants her to take the next one as well cos loving it] Janis: know you gotta at least put my name on the 🏆 now too, right? Jimmy: you know that anyone can have 1 🍀 shot Jimmy: impress me first Janis: babe my 🍀y days were over when I met you, running on pure 💪 now Janis: [makes shot] Jimmy: [gives her a really hot kiss cos that says it all] Janis: you really like winning, yeah? Jimmy: I really like you Janis: feeling's mutual Janis: [kisses back 'cos soz fam deal] Jimmy: [takes & makes his shot easy cos feels great lbr] Janis: [does golf 👏 but actually like go baby] Jimmy: alright nerd Jimmy: calm it down Jimmy: [but is really happy obvs] Janis: make me, dork Jimmy: I don't wanna Jimmy: not when I can get you worked up instead Janis: okay, you aren't THAT good at pool, babe 😂 Jimmy: pool's nearly done with Jimmy: I ain't started with you yet though Janis: Jimmy Janis: [can't meet eyes 'cos distracted af help] Jimmy: Janis Jimmy: [cos we know what saying her name does] Janis: when Janis: where Jimmy: gimme a sec to beat your fake sister at pool Jimmy: but then Jimmy: anywhere Janis: if I really must Jimmy: think about where you're gonna take me Jimmy: have a plan Janis: okay Janis: kinda hard to think now but Jimmy: [finishes up the game but is giving her SO MANY sexy and lingering looks like damn] Jimmy: now Jimmy: where Janis: [outside somehwere idk does not matter as long as relatively secluded lol they've done worse] Janis: here Janis: here is fine Jimmy: here is perfect Janis: ['you'] Jimmy: [says it back how they do & then the most glorious of long kisses] Janis: sorr I was weird earlier Jimmy: you weren't Janis: bit Janis: but you didn't let me ruin it Jimmy: you're always a bit Jimmy: & I ain't ever letting you ruin nowt Jimmy: sorry if I was a massive dickhead Janis: you weren't Janis: seriously Janis: [more smooching] Jimmy: bit but Janis: i love it Jimmy: I love you Janis: that's never gonna not get me Jimmy: good Jimmy: I want it to feel like Jimmy: [hot & heavy make out session] Janis: good Janis: 'cos it feels exactly like Janis: [more] Jimmy: I just really want it to feel like Jimmy: [gets on his knees in the outdoors we all know why but boy HOW EXTRA like you just gonna do this here okay] Janis: fucking hell you're really gonna Janis: fuck Jimmy: [is gonna be that bitch & does] Janis: How does it feel better than the last time even I Jimmy: 'cause I want you even more than last time Jimmy: how do you Janis: this is all you, babe Janis: making me feel so Jimmy: you feel Jimmy: fuck Jimmy: you're just Janis: it's for you Janis: you've looked so good all evening it's so hard to stop myself Jimmy: don't stop Jimmy: I don't ever want you to Jimmy: [likewise doesn't stop what he's doing & is v dedicated rn] Janis: [you know it's getting loud] Janis: had to, remember I told you you couldn't fuck me in that pub Jimmy: 💔 that Jimmy: I've wanted to do this since you showed up by my house Janis: I can really fucking tell Jimmy: [goes harder just because] Janis: please don't stop Janis: ever Jimmy: [doesn't & actually keeps stepping it up cos there's the unspoken promise babe] Janis: [saying his name so much] Janis: don't care if people can hear Jimmy: [being loud his damn self cos hot] Janis: you like eating my pussy out, don't you? Janis: best boyfriend ever Jimmy: [says his yeahs & how much he does out loud cos honestly highkey about all of it] Janis: I wanna cum for you again Janis: lost track of how many times I've came for you today Jimmy: [does all his best moves to make her] Janis: baby? Jimmy: ? Janis: can I have a picture of you from this angle too? Janis: you look Jimmy: you don't need to ask Jimmy: take as many as you want Janis: [does 'cos damn] Jimmy: can you cum for me at least once more when I fuck you up against this wall until I cum inside you or are you gonna have to try & fake it? Janis: [the noise she makes] Janis: you know nothing about us is fake Janis: I want that so bad Janis: do it Jimmy: I want you so bad Jimmy: [does because doesn't even need to be told at this point] Janis: [puts hands flat on wall so her backs to him and her face is pressed against the bricks] Janis: hold my hands there so I can't stop Jimmy: [the noise he makes but obviously will] Janis: I really fucking love you Jimmy: I know Jimmy: & I Janis: I know Jimmy: [is just saying her name so much now oh how the tables have been flipped] Janis: I'm all yours, Jimmy, yours, fuck me right here Jimmy: [go off kids live your best life] Jimmy: keep being mine, okay Janis: I will, I am Janis: I mean it Janis: only you Jimmy: [is dying because who has ever been here for him this hard NOBODY BITCH] Janis: Oh God oh God, baby Jimmy: shit Jimmy: plan b was the best plan Janis: no chance of doing this in town Janis: or getting me to be so loud for you Jimmy: that's why I'd go anywhere with you Jimmy: this is Jimmy: you're Janis: I don't care where we are or what we're doing as long as you're there Janis: though obviously this is my favourite thing to do Jimmy: I'm gonna be there Jimmy: I have to Jimmy: I can't leave you Jimmy: won't fucking do it Janis: [turns her head to kiss him 'cos dead] Janis: I need you Jimmy: [kissing her back hardcore cos feelings bitch & also it just feels really epic so] Jimmy: I need you too Jimmy: I really fucking need you Janis: you've got me Janis: fill me up with your cum and see exactly how you've got me Jimmy: [amazing responses and sounds there 'cause damn, sorry anyone if you can hear any of this right now] Janis: You sound so hot, everyone must be so fucking jealous right now Jimmy: you do Jimmy: & they are Janis: I Janis: I can't get enough of you, ever Jimmy: baby I Jimmy: you're gonna make me Janis: [pushes back harder against his thrusts] Janis: I want it, baby Janis: I want your cum inside my pussy so bad Jimmy: say it Janis: [does, no pretending you didn't hear that passersby] Jimmy: [well that's the end of him 'cause how fucking goals do you wanna be good day] Janis: [turns 'round fully to give him a proper kiss] Jimmy: [hold him up girl he needs a moment after all that] Janis: [as soft as you can be standing against a wall in public] Jimmy: [stop 🚬 so much boy] Janis: [finds somewhere comfortable to sit him down and sit on his lap 'cos standard, arms around his neck and all the little kisses] Janis: you're the best Jimmy: you though Jimmy: I mean it Janis: I know Janis: I do too Jimmy: [snuggles & gentle kisses & hair loving upon for a bit cos soft mood] Janis: are you even real Janis: how do I get to Janis: with you Jimmy: well I ain't fake Jimmy: but I don't know Jimmy: we just Janis: just Janis: yeah Janis: [smiles] Jimmy: [takes a 📷 of her 'cause he can't even with how she looks right now or ever] Jimmy: look how beautiful you are Jimmy: bit rude to be honest Janis: you're just a very good photographer Janis: I think Jimmy: it's only 'cause I got a decent muse & subject Jimmy: look again Janis: [😳] Jimmy: [tells her how beautiful she is again, out loud this time with kisses in between each word like] Janis: you're making me weak for you again already Janis: give yourself the break, babe Jimmy: I don't want a break from you Jimmy: not again Janis: ['I promise'] Jimmy: [more soft kisses damn this boy gonna cry if he don't calm down] Janis: You're all for me, right? Jimmy: [nods & is 😍] Janis: Mine Janis: My baby Janis: [posessive smooching] Jimmy: I don't want anyone else Jimmy: you know Janis: you better not Janis: no one else can do what I can Jimmy: whatever any other girl is or has Jimmy: you are & do Jimmy: but more Jimmy: I knew that before I knew you Jimmy: it's why I noticed you Janis: [hiding in his chest 'cos overwhelmed] Jimmy: I wanted to see if it was real Jimmy: & it is Janis: [whispers 'I love you'] Jimmy: nobody sees this bit of you, do they Janis: [shakes her head] Jimmy: it keeps me together though Jimmy: which is weird 'cause it's the bit that's gentle & whispers & 😳 but Jimmy: I don't know, it's the strongest bit maybe Jimmy: I forgot I had it Janis: me too Janis: if you'd have asked me, I'd have thought I'd have hated you for it Janis: making me remember Janis: but I don't, I just love you so much Jimmy: I get it Jimmy: I didn't want it Jimmy: sometimes I still don't want it in there Janis: yeah Janis: it's Janis: hard Janis: especially with other people around Jimmy: it just really fucking hurts being Jimmy: sometimes Jimmy: knowing things & not knowing things Janis: yeah Janis: having no way of asking Jimmy: can we even still get what we want if there's no Jimmy: it feels like only pieces of things Jimmy: maybe Jimmy: but then you're here & everything Jimmy: so I don't know Jimmy: was I just looking in the wrong fucking place or Janis: I don't know either Janis: but this Janis: us Janis: feels better than nothing Janis: that I do know Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: me too Janis: so can it be enough Janis: for now Jimmy: tell me we can get away from here Jimmy: all this shit Jimmy: & that's enough for ever Janis: we will Janis: we have to Jimmy: this right now Jimmy: that's more of an escape than I reckoned I'd get Jimmy: til 18 anyway Janis: I never did it properly Janis: leaving Janis: but now Janis: I do with you Janis: you're escape Jimmy: whatever else happens, I'll always give you that, alright Janis: alright Jimmy: there's so much I don't know how to say Jimmy: or if I should Jimmy: about before Janis: same so Janis: only if and when we want to Janis: not 'cos we have to or 'cos someone else says it or Janis: our rules Jimmy: [agrees out loud] Jimmy: Ian's a fucking bellend but he has a point about trying to move the fuck on, I suppose Jimmy: I don't want that shit to define me, I never asked for that Jimmy: for them to do it to me & make it all anyone knows about me Jimmy: I don't know Jimmy: I'm just Jimmy: It's like you said earlier about people reckoning they know you Jimmy: thinking about that Janis: That's like Janis: exactly what I meant Janis: you know ME better for not knowing that shit Janis: it just ruins everything Jimmy: I'm happy I know you Jimmy: give a shit about that bollocks Jimmy: getting in the way Janis: then that's all that matters Janis: yeah? Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: it don't even matter that we're too sober for chatting like this Janis: I wont tell if you don't Jimmy: who would I? the 🐶 Janis: maybe Janis: she will bite your face off if you try and brag about what we just did though Jimmy: maybe she'd like me if I told her your secrets though the gossipy bitch Janis: 😱 turn her against me Jimmy: can I brag to Pete about my part of what we just did though? Jimmy: I really miss my man Janis: awh 💔 Janis: 'course Jimmy: I'll leave your name out Jimmy: Juliet who Janis: you would you sneaky bitch Janis: want all the glory Jimmy: 🥇🥇🥇🥇🥇 Janis: race you to CG to 💪 Jimmy: he don't live there, babe Jimmy: only the baby I abandoned in the back Jimmy: check his feed find out where he really is Janis: yes he does Janis: like teachers Jimmy: don't remind me of school Jimmy: i'm just gonna fuck you all day, alright Janis: please Janis: or I'll have to leave at lunch time Janis: not doing double maths Jimmy: soz if you get sore but less painful than the headache of sitting there learning that shit Janis: 🤤 I don't mind Janis: do what you gotta do Jimmy: don't say that & look at me like that Jimmy: fuck Janis: you know I mean it Jimmy: stop Jimmy: I'll 💀💀💀 Janis: don't worry Janis: save it for Monday Janis: day of rest tomorrow 😴 Jimmy: at mine or yours? Janis: where do you wanna be Janis: I mean, lesser of two evils, doesn't really matter to me so Jimmy: do you need 🐶💕 more or less than you need Ian knocking about? Janis: less than I want him knocking you about, obvs Janis: I should probably keep my distance for a bit Jimmy: we'll stay at yours then Janis: if you wanna be back a decent time I can wake you Janis: should go for a run anyways Jimmy: I don't wanna Jimmy: but Janis: surely he has sundays off anyway, right Jimmy: the only time basically Janis: not like you need bonding time Janis: so maybe Janis: stay Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: you gonna make me go for a run with you if I do Janis: you think you can keep up? Janis: cute 😉 Jimmy: girl come on 💪🏆 Janis: okay then Janis: I am gonna make you Jimmy: challenge accepted, babe Janis: definitely an early night for you then, boy Jimmy: you better mean sleeping Jimmy: trying to tire me out before the run Jimmy: bit sneaky Janis: 😇 Janis: sleep on the sofa if you're that concerned Jimmy: no Janis: didn't think so Jimmy: mentally trying to psyche me out too, I get it Jimmy: but I'll sleep better with you Jimmy: so if you're gonna train me you gotta let me Janis: [so cute dies] Janis: okay Janis: see the logic Jimmy: 👍 Janis: do you wanna keep going though or go home or what forreal Jimmy: do you? Janis: you can't 'do you' when I gave you options Jimmy: why Jimmy: you know what I'm on about Janis: 'cos I wanna know what you wanna do Janis: why I asked you first Jimmy: calm down Jimmy: what time are you waking me up? Janis: not that early Janis: 6 Janis: maybe 7 Jimmy: let's go back in for a bit then Janis: 👍

favorite things that i read in 2018 (in approximate chronological order)

poetry

“why won’t you celebrate with me” Lucille Clifton (++)

“The Neighborhood Dog” Russell Edson (+++!)

“Body Snatcher” Daniel Myers (+++ (this is my fave))

Two Poems Eloisa Amezcua (+++)

“AMERICAN SONNET FOR MY PAST AND FUTURE ASSASSIN” TERRANCE HAYES (+++!!)

“SONS OF ACHILLES” Nabila Lovelace (+++!!!)

“Elegy for Mr. Spock“ W. Todd Kaneko (+++!)

“a breakdown of types and costs of American Girl Dolls” ASHLEY MIRANDA (+++!!)

“Chap” REILLY D. COX & BRENNAN EMMETT COX (+++!!! (this is incredible))

“Shoulda Been Jimi Savannah” Patricia Smith (+++)

“At My First Punk Show Ever, 1998” Hanif Abdurraqib (+++ (re-read, a fave))

Three Reilly Cox (++++!!!)

Two Poems Reilly Cox (+++!!)

fiction

“Premonitions of a Valley Girl” CAT INGRID LEECHES (++++!!)

“The Entryway” Kira Frank (+++ (tws))

“Sister Godzilla” LOUISE ERDRICH (+++!!!!!!!)

“The Fifth Story” Clarice Lispector (+++!)

“Dimension” Alice Munro (+++!!! (tws))

“Apollo” Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie (+++ x100)

“All at One Point” Calvino

Five Stories Lydia Davis (+++!)

“WHY I CAN NO LONGER LOOK AT A PICNIC BLANKET WITHOUT LAUGHING”  Yukiko Motoya (+++)

“CODE OF OPERATION: SNAKE FARM” Amelia Gray (+++!)

“Man Not Superman” Jonathan Goldstein (+++ (a fave))

“A Diagram of Reproductive Anatomy” CAT INGRID LEECHES (!!!!)

“Live Mermaids” ELIZABETH THERIOT (+++ (i love it))

“Who Binds and Looses the World with Her Hands” RACHAEL K. JONES (+)

“Seasons of Glass and Iron” AMAL EL–MOHTAR (+++)

“Monster Girls Don't Cry” A. MERC RUSTAD (+++)

“Welcome to Your Authentic Indian Experience™” Rebecca Roanhorse (+++!!)

“Regarding Your Future With The Futures Planning Consortium” Raq Winchester & Fran Wilde (++)

“The Red Thread” SOFIA SAMATAR (+++)

“TILDA SWINTON’S CHRISTMAS COUPONS” RACHEL SIEMENS (+++!)

“Ten Years a Statue” Sam Martone (+++!)

“Space” Sam Martone (+++!!)

nonfiction

“BLACK GIRLS FROM THE HOOD ARE THE REAL TRENDSETTERS” WANNA THOMPSON (+++!!!)

“Lay Off the High Ones” ISABELLE DAVIS (+++!!!)

“Sword Guys Are a Thing and I’ve Had Sex With All of Them” Hana Michels (++) 

“A Wonderfully Weird Wedding” MICHEAL FOULK (++ <3)

“Meet the Glasscos: Lesbian foster parents in the Bible Belt” KATHERINE WEBB-HEHN (this is beautiful and made me cry a lot idk)

“Wherever West Is” Jeanna Kadlec (+++! (love this))

“Caramel” Krys Malcolm Belc (+++)

“IT’S ME, THE LIGHT-SKINNED BLACK GIRL IN YOUR SCHOOL’S DIVERSITY PAMPHLET” JENNA LYLES (DAMN THIS IS GOOD)

Small Talk Krys Malcolm Belc (+++!!!)

“Welcome to Dog World!” Blair Braverman (+++!)

excerpt from Lying Lauren Slater (+++!!)

“The Killer in the Pool” Tim Zimmermann (this is awful and really sad)

“The Octopus at the Camden Aquarium” Robin Gow (+++!!!)

“Litter” Reilly Cox (+++!!!)

“Die in Summer or Not at All: A Resurrection in Three Acts” Sarah Panlibuton Barnes (+++!!!! (this is an incredible essay! (tws sex tho)))

chapbooks

loathe/love/lathe alain ginsberg (+++!!)

our own soft katie clark (++)

flowers are for pussies (and other white lies) sung yim (+++! (tws))

the weather came & so did we zooey ghostly (+++!!)

can we talk here belladonna*132 carmen gimenez smith (+++! (fave))

fiction novel

the grotesque child kim parko (++++! (second read; i love it))

pop fiction

the 100 (+ (series))

the scorch trials (++ (series))

aristotle and dante discover the secrets of the universe (+)

truth-witch (+++! (slow start, but i really liked this))

crazy rich asians (+++!)

comics

runaways (2003) vaughn/alphona/newbold (++)

heavy vinyl Usdin / Vakueva (++)

Fence (+++!!! (i love this so much))

runaways (2005)  vaughn/alphona/yeung (+++)

black lightning (1977) isabella/von eeden/springer (++)

Black Lightning: Year One (+++++++, i cried a lot)

black lightning (1995) (+++! (i cried more sos))

moonstruck vol 1 (+++)

the prince and the dressmaker (+++)

nimona (+++!)

how to be a werewolf (++++ <3)

clueless benson/kuhn/keenan (+++ (a fun read))

man-eater is 1-2 (++)

runaways (2008) moore/ramos (+++)

dream daddy lee c.a./jack gross (+++!)

avengers academy is 1 gage/mckone/cox (+++)

runaways (2018) rowell/anka/wilson (+++!!! <3 <3 <3(gd i love this))

goddess mode quinn/rodriguez (+++)

poetry

simulacra airea d. matthews (+++!)

cannibal safiya sinclair (this book is really fucking incredible)

calling a wolf a wolf (++)

sons of achilles nabila lovelace (++++!)

rocket fantastic (+)

in full velvet (+++)

what runs over kayleb rae candrilli (+++!!!)

don’t call us dead (goddamn this is good)

literary journals

bwr 44.2 (++) 

Here Lies Dreaded V3 Discourse

So I have seemed to cause a huge kerfuffle in the hardcore Ouma conspiracy theorists standom, and a banal (if condescending, but seeing the response to it honestly justifies it more than anything now. “Don’t dish it out if you can’t take it”, you better believe I can take it and will now PROPERLY dish it out right back at you) comment about one of Tsumugi’s anime references has led to someone launching a hilariously personal attack at me for Daring To Disagree With A Theory That Was Posted On A Public Website. Someone who I wasn’t even initially responding too, at that. And has now blocked me before even allowing me to respond and clarify my original comments. Don’t want to deal with the consequences of being a repugnant, rude person I guess? Shock and surprise for Tumblr.

The link to the post is here, but I’ve taken the liberty to screenshot it just in case it gets deleted later, in hope that maybe there’ll be some reflection on this person’s part that this really is not an acceptable way to respond to people who have a dissenting opinion? Anyways, I will be responding to the personal attack post and that will be the last time I interact with this group, because clearly it’s not worth it to actually have a discussion about our respective ending theories. I ain’t got time beyond this for tedious insecure fucks these days.

Anyways, my response is under the cut to save my poor followers’ dashes. Sorry to drag drama onto my blog but I can’t really let this slide. I’m also tagging @jacks-plays-drv3 just because I assume the twin comes with the other with these two, and I want my response to have been seen.

Screenshot In This Link - This post is long enough without the image taking up more space, haha.

Let’s start with this mess, shall we? And I will go into painstaking detail.

Paragraph 1: So this already starts off with a whole lot of needless aggression and projection. So I’m not even going to attempt to be nice back. But: maybe I haven’t proven anything because I literally had not typed up a response to clarify my original comments @ Jacks yet before the rabid attack dog was unleashed? Like, there was literally no attempt from you to have a discussion that was a genuine offer from me, I was not out to get you actually. I also honestly just laughed at being called shallow, JUST LIKE THAT HORRIBLE CHARACTER TSUMUGI SHIROGANE right off the bat as well. That’s a compliment really, honey. Weirdly I don’t share the same opinions as you do. Tsumugi is my fave and unlike you I actually think about and HAVE analyzed/discussed her character in detail previously, which I would’ve been happy to share had you not immediately went into Blind Raging Idiot Mode. Guess we can’t have it all, huh?

As for needing proof that she makes the Flashback Lights... nevermind the CG that literally shows her making them during Chapter 6, but do you have proof that Monokuma is the person who makes the Lights instead of just placing them for the students? I doubt it, somehow. Cuz a lot of your theories don’t actually have any concrete proof. Quelle surprise. Probably why anyone not immediately on board with your headcanon gets you so goddamn angry, huh? Cuz it’s completely baseless and you know it at heart.

As for the Ouma comments, actually I have read the assorted creator comments regarding his character even if you like to believe I’m a slobbering moron who turned my brain off as soon as I finished V3, so yes I already know that his name was chosen to sound mastermind-like. Maybe this was to emphasize and make his fake mastermind reveal appear more legit on first read? JUST A THOUGHT, SWEETIE. You know the entire fucking point of Chapter 5? You’re so slavishly devoted to your theory that you actually are incapable of reading the basic fucking text from the actual game, but again. Not a surprise. Considering what I’ve read from your blog (really, who are you again? I only knew Jacks’ blog from before all this, so you taking such a personal offense at my comments is honestly hilarious but baffling at the same time. It ain’t all about you, babe.)

As for the lab door, here’s an simpler explanation (Occam’s Razor, look it up): The star sign constellation pattern was there as a hint for the player to connect Ouma’s messages from his dorm room to the vault in Amami’s lab once its opened and you can see the star signs in there. Or perhaps it was designed like that by TDR to make the students make that connection as well in the original script and think that Ouma was the mastermind cuz of the connection to Amami’s lab? Literally, there are a lot of possibilities, cuz it’s a NOTHING DETAIL THAT DOESN’T ACTUALLY MATTER IN THE BIG PICTURE. Considering Kodaka’s track record with writing these games I don’t actually believe it’s anything major, personally. He doesn’t really strike me as the type to hide this completely separate story underneath the actual story we got, and with such vague nothing “”””””””””””clues””””””””””””. You and Jacks do yourselves (well you already do cuz you love to jack yourselves off with how CLEVER AND BETTER you are than the rest of us plebs), sure, in believing otherwise (You have way too much faith in him as a writer. Or you’re desperately trying to pretend V3 wasn’t poorly written cuz you don’t like the Ch. 6 twist) but also realize that its nothing more than extrapolation on your part that it actually means anything beyond the.... SHALLOW (horror scream) connection given in-game.

And really, who the fuck cares if it doesn’t match the title of ‘Supreme Leader’? It’s already a ridiculous talent as it stands already. The entire point of his character is that everything about him, his motives and his talent is contradictory and weird. That’s why I like him, actually. He isn’t an abused martyr who never lies like you goons believe and he also isn’t the evil monstrous chessmaster some of the fandom thinks. It’s Complex Motives™ .

Anyways moving on. Pointing out an anime reference =/= DISREGARDING PEOPLE’S ANALYSIS. Pointing out that most of the plot leads up to and supports the fiction twist =/= uncritically agreeing with everything Tsumugi says. Actually, after examining the game’s story for myself I came to the conclusion that all the clues in it really only support her version of the story, really. There are a few things I think she lied about, but it is not CONCLUSIVELY proven she lied in my opinion and so I don’t really give a fucking toss until new canon comes out and reveals more of the V3 story. Oumatwin don’t real, gurl. If there was actually anything in-game beyond one obvious joke line in the NON-CANON!!!!!!! bonus mode supporting that he existed, maybe I’d respect your theory more. Even though you don’t deserve respect after your little tantrum. 

Paragraph 2: Jesus I already am investing way too much time into this response at people who don’t actually deserve it, oh well. But laughing hard at the attempt to try and act as if you weren’t being a snobby asshole with your comments. Again, HUGE AMOUNTS OF PROJECTION at me about things I literally have never done and said. I have never interacted with you or Jacks prior to my initial comment. No fucking clue why you brought up the SaiOuma shit, cuz I don’t even LIKE Saihara as a character and don’t like that fujobait ship in the slightest? But I guess it’s easier to assume that all your critics are the exact same fucking person with the same opinions, so you can feel more persecuted, huh? You literally did not even wait for me to respond or check my blog that would’ve easily disproven these dumb-as-fuck assumptions. And get off the fucking high horse (pun completely intended), you lot are not the only people in this fandom who are capable of critical thought. How completely self-obsessed can you be? 

For someone who claims to have a lot of critical thinking skills compared to this nasty fandom, you really are terrible at parsing other people’s words. You fucking know when I said “group of anime fans” that I was referring to Team Danganronpa, the organization literally mentioned in game as running the game. The group Tsumugi is part of. She literally has a company badge FFS. THEY ARE ANIME FANS. THEY ALL STARTED KILLING GAMES CUZ THEY ALL LOVE THIS SHITTY SERIES. I can’t believe this had to be explained. And the rest of this paragraph word salad is the most pedantic argument. It’s really not hard to believe an organization in this series would have access to all this tech. And yes, it’s a popular TV show in-universe, of course it’ll have funding. And the whole damn point of the ending is that the V3 world is consuming fiction the wrong way by having real-life killing games, missing the entire point of the DR series and fiction in general? What’s your actual point?

Paragraph 3: Again more assumptions, I wasn’t ‘crying’ about being called gullible. I was just pointing it out as part of your extremely unnecessary smug dismissal of my post. That you really haven’t disproved at all, btw. Honestly the childish response you both had to me just makes me laugh out of pity more than anything. And if I was really upset I wouldn’t have offered to have a discussion with you or even continued to reply after Jacks initial (vague) post about what I said. So don’t put words in my mouth. And yes my analysis was not completed in my initial comments. It’s Tumblr fucking replies, I can’t fit the entire fucking dissertation of Tsumugi opinions in there for you to jeer at in there. Again, I offered to share my opinions and got this as a response, so lol. You are your own worst enemy when it comes to trying to get people to take you and your theories seriously. 

Paragraph 4: Especially since you immediately jump to PULLING THINGS OUT OF YOUR ASS (seriously, fucking snorted at this part. I want this whole diatribe on my fucking gravestone. It’s by far the most hilariously petty thing ever said about me on this site.) instead of letting me explain my position. If you just want to be in the creepy cult Oumatwin echo chamber you should’ve just said and blocked me ASAP instead of word salading vague bullshit justifications for why actually people who disagree with you are just stupid crybabies who can never hope to understand your genius. Again, my initial comments didn’t whine about not being taken seriously at all, I was pointing out the hypocrisy/rudeness is all. And again, get off the high horse about critical thinking. I have thought about Tsumugi’s character and how she relates to the over-arching plot and how truthful it is, and the overall ‘mystery’ of V3 (spoiler: there is none. it was all solved by chapter 6). I have thought about this game. In fact I dedicate too much time to critical analysis of this series that doesn’t actually deserve it cuz lately I find Kodaka to be a hack writer. Your assumptions are flat-out wrong, dear. And AGAIN. I WOULD’VE. SHARED AND DISCUSSED IN MORE DETAIL HAD I BEEN GIVEN THE OPPORTUNITY. But rude fucks gonna vomit shit out of their mouth cuz they have literally no self-control and have meltdowns at the slightest difference of opinion, I guess. 

Your extreme hatred for Tsumugi as a character truly shines through. Clearly no thought has been put into her from your end, even though you and Jacks rage about people not taking Ouma seriously as a character. Double standards as always with fujos. Nothing I’m not used too, she is incredibly unpopular in this fandom. And everyone is entitled to their own opinions. So I’m not even mad at that. I have never said otherwise. Even you and Jacks are valid in having your own theories and thoughts. The ending of V3 is designed entirely so everyone can analyze the game for themselves and draw their own conclusions about the story and themes. That’s the whole point. Even though I personally dislike that as a writing decision on Kodaka’s part because I would prefer the story to be conclusively ended and the epilogue is a giant turd that misses the entire point of Chapter 6 and enables shit (anal pun intended, dumbass) like this to start spreading as “Analysis”. But hey, to each their own.

However I will not be interacting with either of you again after this post though, even though I was willing to discuss beforehand, because you both have shown yourselves to be incredibly vile with the way you approach other people in this fandom, and especially those who don’t share your conspiracy theory. Despite the absolutely ironic comments I’ve seen from Oumanous in their later, also terrible posts about how you need to understand your opponent before engaging, which they literally failed entirely to do before engaging the firing squad at me and other commentators who responded. So much for the sanctity of discussion, huh? Enjoy your circlejerk. Everyone else who follows me in this fandom though? Please consider blocking these two if you are also a sane human being who is capable of polite discussion/disagreements. They are not worth your time otherwise. They were really not worth my time writing this post, but I felt I had to say something.

In conclusion: Out with the both of you.

11 Questions Meme

Rules: always post the rules. Answer 11 random questions posted for you. Create 11 new ones and tag 11 people. Let the person who tagged you know that you answered.

I was tagged by @vextant​!

You’ve just won an all-expenses-paid weeklong trip! Where are you going? Bolivia’s Salar de Uyuni

If you could learn any language - modern, dead, or otherwise - what would it be? Spanish seems like it’d be the most useful, although I would also kind of love to be able to sign in ASL. Hebrew/Yiddish competency would also bring me joy.

Are you a writer? A reader? What’s your favorite thing to write and/or read? Born this way, baby. And, um, everything? But also, science fiction.

Do you agree with what your astrological sign/MBTI says about your personality? I’ve never paid a lot of attention to what being a Taurus means, but I totally buy my ISFJ identification.

The ghost of a historical figure knocks on your door, asking if you’re coming to brunch. Who is it? It has been Susan B. Anthony since I was 10, and fuck those dinosaurs who use her for anti-choice rabble-rousing.

Have a pet? Tell me about them. If not, tell us about the pet(s) you’d like to have. I do not have a pet. I want a dog, but my husband needs to get on that train because I don’t want to single-parent a dog. (He wants one long-term but doesn’t want to deal with pet care while still in grad school; we’re also still debating breeds because he has allergies and I don’t want a poodle hybrid.) Please point me toward a Samoyed, though.

What fictional character do you adore but know you would never get along with? Why? Honestly, I think almost all of my faves would totally terrify me in person, starting with Sarah Connor.

You’ve acquired a time machine that bypasses all the typical shenanigans so you can observe without consequence. When do you want to visit? I’d like to bop around the 1960s in the U.S. and see to what extent it actually feels like today, with the civil rights and related movements and the threats of nuclear annihilation and so on. Also, I could see the original production of Hair while I was there.

What do you not like about a favorite movie/book/game of yours? How would you fix it? How about the Deathly Hallows epilogue reads like something other than bad fanfiction? There’s so much fic that does it better.

Do you have any OCs? If so, who’s your favorite and why? Not really, but I did explain recently why I feel like I have some ownership over TSCC’s Savannah Weaver and why I will always adore my version of her. 

You’ve been asked to be a voter for a new awards show. What’s your submission for Best Meme of 2017? I had to Google to figure out what the nominees might be, but I think I’ll go with “This Is The Future Liberals Want.” Real talk, though, I still love the text post/Onion headlines/AO3 tags/TFLN over screencaps thing.

Tagging the following 11 people in no particular order for the following 11 questions, also in no particular order:

@fulltimeprocrastinator, @iloveyouandilikeyou, @code-name-duchess, @sullenaquarian, @scullyseviltwin, @needalittleoldfashioned, @mediumsizedfountain, @running-rabbit, @awkdinosaur, @mhalachai, @clubgetright

Bearded angsty Captain America or bearded angsty Superman?

Favorite fictional starship?

If you write fic, what fandom/plot bunny got you into it? If you don’t, what might it take?

Are you now or have you ever been a picky eater?

Does jogging keep you healthy? If so, God, at what cost? If not, what’s your preferred mode of exercise (and in what weird ways has it messed up your body)?

Strangest alcohol you’ve ever encountered?

Best pun you’ve heard recently?

Would you say you’re a good swimmer? Why or why not?

Describe your ideal calendar date, without using the Miss Congeniality gif.

What aspect of your day job do you most have trouble believing someone actually pays you for?

Which U.S. state would you least like to visit and why?

Random stuff no one cares about (fuck u jo)

@mysmoldarkfictionalsons told me to do this so it here it is 1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? Milk than cereal

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? Yes

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? Pages of homework, pens, tickets, earphones

4: how do you take your coffee/tea? Alone or with really little milk

5: are you self-conscious of your smile? Yup

6: do you keep plants? Two cactus

7: do you name your plants? Nope

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? Does editing count?

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? Yes

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? All three? But I’ll say side?

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends? “Stitch”

12: what’s your favorite planet? Uranus

13: what’s something that made you smile today? Talking about 80s voltron with Ce

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? It’d be small, full of our stuff and a comfy sofa for us to cuddle

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! There is a planet that may be made entirely out of diamonds

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish? Spaghetti carbonara

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair? Rose gold/purple/blue

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. When they got drunk in the village party and they tried jumping to the river from the bridge and I had to take care of them all (I am the one to bring this up btw)

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? Kind of? And just random ideas and stuff (ok and also dates and shit)

20: what’s your favorite eye color? Green

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. It’s blue with starts on it and it’s completely destroyed by now, the zip doesn’t even work anymore and it’s all full of scratches rip

22: are you a morning person? Depends tbh

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? Watch a movie/show/anime, read or edit

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? I think yes?

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? An old house… I don’t usually break into places

26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? My Panama jack shoes rip

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor? Berries

28: sunrise or sunset? Sunset

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? When she’s nervous, Eva is always trying to grab someone’s hand without realising AND IT’S SO CUTE

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared? Yup

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. I like socks, but not that much? In winter and all they’re great but in summer I prefer my feet to be free

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. A guy in the village party (again) kept following us around, so Angel went and asked him what happened. The guy then just turned around like half pouting and handed us his empty hand and was like “I wanted to give you cookies”. And we ran. The lesson is, kids, never drink or do drugs if you don’t want to end up like that man

33: what’s your fave pastry? Orejas de carnaval con chocolate

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? It was called Eric and it was a white dog with brown spots and it’s somewhere in my room, im pretty sure

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? Yeah but in the end I always end up using the most normal stuff

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now? Oh wonder

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean? Clean

38: tell us about your pet peeves! I hate it when people like crack their knuckles? Nope don’t do that in front of me I beg you. Also people that walk slow… move dammit

39: what color do you wear the most? Black

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you? The chain my grandmother gave me for my communion. It has an image of virgin Maria as a child and my name engraved and she told me my grandfather had always wanted to give me a chain like that one

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving? El laberinto de los espíritus

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! Not really

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? Silvia…

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? Like a week ago? Lmao it didn’t last long

45: do you trust your instincts a lot? Yup.. doesn’t mean they work

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of. Are you a son of Poseidon? Cause you got me all wet (I’m gonna go bury myself now)

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? Cauliflower. Take it away

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? My biggest fear was the world suddenly ending… yep…. I was weird. Maybe it isn’t the same but yoU CAN’T TELL ME THAT ISN’T SCARY

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? Yes but I usually cant buy them which leads to the part where I can’t remember which one was the last I bought

50: what’s an odd thing you collect? Do snow globes count? I have some of them and I love them

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? I’m not mentioning the person but photograph

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? The glasses one? Is that from this year or last? Ah fuck it

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? No, yes, no, yes Weird af but strangely great

54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face? Grandma

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point? Breaking a pencil (the thing we were discussing was that I didn’t have enough strength to break it okay so I got all hulk mode and broke it)

56: what are some things you find endearing in people? people that do a lot of hand gestures (they remind me of myself tho)

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? It makes me feel like a psycho murdered :’) nah kidding it makes me feel nostalgic AND WHO DOESN’T RE-ENACT THE LYRICS SMH

58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? Jandro is the Vodka aunt and Jo is the wine mom (although she is Vodka but she is way more mom so fuck it)

59: what’s your favorite myth? Persephone’s myth or Icarus one

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? I love it and my fave authors (cause I can’t choose poems) are Bécquer, Góngora, Rubén Darío and Pablo Neruda

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received? I’ve never given really stupid gifts? My gifts are good *gasps* and my cousin gave me a clown nose once

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? Sometimes I drink orange juice

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? I am very fussy and it’s the one thing I’ll always have tidy af

64: what color is the sky where you are right now? Ugly grey ugh

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with? Do my online friends count? Maybe?

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? It’d have blue and white that’s all I know

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? Sleepy. That’s it.

68: what’s winter like where you live? Cold and grey but with snow tho

69: what are your favorite board games? To be honest I don’t know?

70: have you ever used a ouija board? Nah (I was going to, then backed down you see)

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea? I don’t know, I’m more of a coffee girl

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it? Yep

73: what are some of your worst habits? Biting my cheeks/lip until it bleeds and scratching my scalp and ears until it bleeds too (que sanguinolenta por favor)

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. Love

75: tell us about your pets! A bird, his name is Winnie and he’s a little shit but I love him

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t? Studying history

77: pink or yellow lemonade? Yellow (I’ve never had pink lol)

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? I’m neutral ground

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? Joana’s video for my birthday

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? Violet and white and yes I chose it because they’re two of my faves colours there’s nothing feel about it

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. Beer bottle

82: are/were you good in school? I am good thanks very much

83: what’s some of your favorite album art? Idk

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? Idk

85: do you read comics? what are your faves? Yes and here’s a thing about me I cannot by the sake of my life choose favorites in anything don’t make me do it

86: do you like concept albums? which ones? Depends?

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? Tbh I’d say the Godfather (can’t really think of any other rn rip why do you put me in such compromises?)

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? No??

89: are you close to your parents? Meh

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. All I have to say is it has history, culture and it’s beautiful sorry I don’t want to make this long

91: where do you plan on traveling this year? Dublin lololol

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? Drown it in cheese bitch give me all of it

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most? Ponytail/bun

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday? A classmate on the 28th

95: what are your plans for this weekend? Doing my Spanish project and editing

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? Procrastination my dear

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? INFP, cancer, Ravenclaw

98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? I’m not sure? Sometime in December with my father and yes

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. Light by sleeping at last100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? 5 years into the future, I don’t want to relive my past thanks

I don’t have anyone to tag (my only friends are the tagger (fuck you) and the other person she tagged ( @nekolance why) So bye bye do it if you want to

Tweets!

All my tweets since August 29th, 2016

Currently renewing my unhealthy obsession with Harry Styles. Seniors- have a fun year knowing that all the people older than you in school get to sleep in on Mondays If it comes in rose gold, I own it Lol @ seniors who think they're the shit All of my stories start with "well first of all, bitch" I love myself. Thought you ought to know. When your roommate is THE SAME DISNEY PRINCESS AS YOU My mom keeps sending me pictures of her food Still in summer mode Drew some nice pics of myself getting electrocuted in math today I can literally find someone on the Internet in .002 secs with just a first name, but tell me to hand in my assignment online and I'll die LOOK AT THE LITTLE HEART #GreysAnatomy GREYS FOOTBALL AND HOW TO GET AWAY WITH MURDER TONIGHT IS THE NIGHT If you live tweet next weeks Criminal Minds season premiere, I'll report you for emotional abuse I have not lost my voice, my voice just doesn't like me so she moved out. I send my parents paragraphs and hundreds of pictures of school and I am repaid with one word sentences and blurry pictures of my dog. I come home to find that my parents literally did everything they could to conceal everything that has anything to do with me in my room ALSO MY BATHROOM SMELLS LIKE CLEANING FLUID AND I KNOW DAMN WELL IT SMELLED LIKE "sweet peony" WHEN I LEFT Anthony's favorite hobby is absolutely roasting people on the Hudl app MUZZ WAS SO EXCITED TO SEE ANTHONY THAT HE PEED ON THE COUCH On a scale from 1-10 of brokenness, I'm a $34.72. I'm really proud of myself because I finished 1/8 of an essay that's due on Thursday #overachiever Btw, Anthony replied to my hint with pictures of his papa I know it's the law... But could the train maybe not blow the whistle 6 times through a campus of sleep deprived college kids????? Spagetting to know you Julia and I are in bed watching a movie and wondering why it's so loud... ITS 8:00 PM But how the f is it October in like 2 days We're over here acting like its the damn ice age I've been coughing all over everyone and everything and IM A TERRIBLE ROOMMATE IM SO SORRY WTF "5 Crazy" I love you, SVU Women before us fought to have the right to vote - don't take that for granted #VOTE My bed is absolutely COVERED in pillows, blankets, wires, school supplies, clothes and Tide pods etc… This woman started vaping and then another woman told her to stop, and now they are full on screaming at each other. ON THE COMMUTER RAIL. Guys, this clown thing is REAL I'm having a hard enough time sleeping without all these inconsiderately loud people outside my building clown hunting The dangerous part about college is going back to your bed in between classes WORDS LITERALLY CANT DESCRIBE HOW EXCITED I AM FOR BEAUTY AND THE BEAST. Belle is my Disney princess and Emma Watson is my all time favorite actress I'm crying Constantly waiting for the 12th of each month so I can have some data You can now get a life sentence for animal abuse. Justice. When your roommates make fun of you for complimenting an absolute FIRE selfie of yourself <<<< SUNDAY SHOPPING SPREE I fcking love candy corn You don't understand... our school and social lives have to fit around the voice and grey's. Sometimes my hand slips and I accidentally share something to my Facebook page We're gonna miss you #ThanksPapi It would be fun to me Harley Quinn for Halloween, but I refuse to be one of "those girls" Never be afraid to be yourself!! Happy National Coming Out Day everyone Julia and I have been watching Netflix in bed for 5 hours. COME BE OUR FRIENDS OMG Tmlt I fcking love Evan Peters and AHS Netflix for dayyyyyyzzzz May god bless you and may your eyebrows be forever on point Dear very high people in the hall, please talk even louder! And continue to walk around in your underwear! Please! I'm DYING. As soon as josh got home he immediately told everyone not to ask any questions about the dance My baby brother is almost 14 and he's like a foot taller than me and his voice is deeper than my dad's My little brother got a 30 yrd touchdown and 40 yrd run Mo and Julia are asleep and I'm just laying here laughing my ass off Literally the worst thing in the world is realizing you have a hole in your leggings Backless dresses are just so incredibly beautiful I love them The girls are asleep and I am laughing like a fcking psycho. What's new? Sorry that I retweet a lot, I just feel like sharing the things I find awesome or funny are worth making your day too I love reconnecting I have heart failure walking to class when I start to hear a longboarder behind me Cookies and Gilmore Girls with my babes It's 11:00 and we're trying to sleep pls enforce quiet hour or I will Julia and I suck at life so we put it on the internet. #relatable "Omg have you seen @JeffreeStar new black highlighter?" "Isn't that just a sharpie?" NO JULIA IT IS NOT A SHARPIE I love late night phone calls with my man Rewatching greys is my fave thing to do Meeting guy friends at college is easy until you bring up your boyfriend I told everyone in my kindergarten class that I was a boy. So, surprise everyone idk what that was about Life update: the heater in our room is making loud, evil noises. This started yesterday and has not stopped. This heater needs medical attention I am honestly concerned for this heater's health. She's clearly leaking or dying or something College is not being able to afford a stapler and the professor refusing to collect unstapled papers. Derek Shepherd has been setting unrealistic expectations since 2005. Feliz Dia de Los Muertes! I'm so excited for Beauty and the Beast I'm actually crying. Real tears. I'm seeing it MINIMUM 10 times in theaters "THIS MEAT IS SO RAW A GOOD VET COULD SAVE IT" Anthony wutttttttt No Makeup November JULIA AND I ARE CRYING (not happy tears) The sun rose this morning and it will rise tomorrow morning My dad has had a variation of the same car since 1995 "You are SO loud" "I just don't care" lol k Anthony Scooby doo I cried twice today, first because I watched the Beauty and the Beast trailer, the second time was when I re-watched the trailer. My dream job is when it's always Friday Also no makeup November is going swimmingly, I may never wear makeup everyday ever again All the bathrooms on my floor are being cleaned and I've been holding my pee for an hour and a half. Can I be someone's creepy older prom date this year? I had some real good coffee this morning and I feel absolutely fantastic, this may be a new me Anthony is snapchatting me live from his room where his roommate is keeping him captive and asking deep questions about life College is being awake at 11pm which is just enough time to squeeze in a few more episodes of greys before 12 COLLEGE IS BEING AWAKE AT 12:30am BUT THERES ONLY ONE MORE EPISODE IN THE SEASON Hobbies include: coughing loudly and rudely when I pass people who are smoking When I'm actively trying to not laugh my ass off at stupid stuff because roommate Just a reminder to be careful and safe this holiday season I want a pretty case because the life proof one is too much but I can't afford a new phone sooo.... TMI: I threw up all over a bathroom stall today. I warned you. My professor shaded me in front of the whole class. I don't have room for embarrassment because I high key gained so much respect. Savagery Hahaha at least my eyebrows are fleeky The weather today is less than ideal. Julia made a tinder and then promptly deleted it when she saw an attractive man. THIS IS WHY. THIS IS WHY. True friends snapchat from across the room If the wifi would stay connected, I wouldn't run out of data every month The temperature was in the single digits today and I honestly don't know how I've ever been able to live like this for so long There is a full on absolutely raging party down the hall from my room. 24 hour quiet hours what College made me addicted to tums Sleep is great, but have you ever watched Netflix? Prof almost made us stay past the two hours like... fuck you thought?? Oh annnnnnd I woke my ass up at 7:00 this morning to get a waffle AND THEY HADNT PUT THE STATION OUT YET Why does my brother constantly ask what we got him for xmas?? Like we're not telling you and if we did your xmas would be ruined Trying to save up...but Sephora I can't even put into words how sad I am about Carrie Fishers passing. Rest In Peace. Someone get me on the slopes Can't stop won't stop crying at the Beauty and the Beast trailer. What did I do to deserve this Every time I lose a snapchat streak, I die a little on the inside I'm such a daddy's girl tbh Setting that 4 am alarm is absolutely killer Hey at least the Cubs won the World Series in 2016 Thought about making a resolution to go to the gym and eat green stuff, but I'm just gonna do me, eat cookies and walk occasionally Tmlt- moral: be happy, and do what makes you happy I really just slept until 5pm Traveling through Hoth in my damn Jetta was fun I should have just skied home from work smh These are the days that I wish my dad's Outback was automatic. Smh I share a bathroom w two teenage boys. There is a pile of underwear in the corner that grows +2 every day.