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starlightiing · 1 month

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Sighs

Today is the day of mess ups apparently. I made a tiny mistake at work and someone on my team was very quick to toss me right under the bus about it, even though I had already owned up to the fact that it was my mistake, because I do not blame other people for MY mistakes and never have - and that really got under my skin. She like panicked and sent all these emails out about how "Well Jessica assigned it I didn't assign it." like girl, relax, they KNOW. I literally said that it was my oversight, on the same email thread you were CC'd on. Relax.

I messed up something trying to have a conversation earlier - also entirely my oversight. I've apologized and we've moved on but it's really eating at me that i've made such an oversight. That's in no way on them at all, of course, I've got to figure out how to deal with that in my own head.

I have nightmare disorder and I had 3 nightmares last night, one of which caused a bit of a panic when I woke up. It's not done well for my mental state today either, I know it's making things 50x worse than they actually are in reality. Again, my brain issue, figuring out how to work through that.

Been quite upset by a few things with a few of my friends recently - I don't want to go into too much detail really, but I've been really hurt by one and I'm still navigating figuring out what to do about that as well, because it's not something that's worth bringing up. Then of course there's the issue with my ex-friend who sent me that really nasty email? Nothing of what she said bothers me at all, what bothers me is I still care about what happens to her and I know she's going through a huge mental break despite what she feels about me or what she's said to me/about me I still like, hope she's okay?? Even though I can't check in on her or help her in any way.

Generally just not a vibe today. I have a very "roll over and take the kicks" sort of submissive attitude today which is very unlike me. I'm not a vicious fighter by any means but I don't usually just take punches. I don't have the energy to do anything BUT today.

I doubt anyone's read this anyway, I don't really have much of a following here which is why I choose to vent here, as I assume I can just scream words and they won't really be found. But if you have read this, thank you, and I'm sorry. I'm lonely, I'm tired, my meds aren't working, I'm amped up, strings of mistakes are softening me today, I just want to be held and my fiance is in Scotland so lol on that. I just. Need people.

#vent post #i don't expect this to be read #just feelings tossed into the atmosphere before i shut the fuck up for the day and just idk #disappear into fandom posts

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cyellolemon · 29 days

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Also super quick labru thing because i needed to draw t4t labru but i didn't manage to draw any better than that sryyy

#i like what fandom makes of them but it makes me too anxious to do stuff myself so you won't have more sorry!!!!#i was just a little silly with this one and that's it..#i just!!! needed t4t Kabru and Laois nothing more #i don't like posting quick art like this but maybe someone else needed it.. maybe.... time to disappear now #dungeon meshi fanart #dunmeshi #dungeon meshi #laois touden #kabru #labru #fanart #my art #t4t art #mlm art #trans artwork

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dangerous-advantage · 9 months

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jin ling, having done some stupid shit: my uncle's gonna kill me!

lan sizhui, serenely: it's ok, your other uncle's a necromancer

#hey bitches i'm back and tentatively looking to enter a new fandom space #first post into the mxtx assorted fandom i can't believe it's something this stupid /lh #fun fact this is the first fandom i've entered that i am actually intimidated by #like idk why maybe bc it's a larger fandom or one more established? like what are the rules here /silly #anyway i might end up writing something for this. i'm also back from having disappeared idk if i'll be here consistently but we'll see #mxtx #mo dao zu shi #mdzs #jin ling #lan sizhui #has this been done? if not i'm disappointed in this fandom #i say as if i have any experience with said fandom #look man this is stupid as shit but it wouldn't leave my head #grandmaster of demonic cultivation

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bluegooo · 6 months

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The voice in my head (besty) says to post this. Who am I to disobey

#this ot3 is so magical that it made me draw fanart for the first time and post something on tumblr #throws niche ship at you and runs back into the void for the next half a year probably #wth I never even thought that I would be in any fandom #I overdid the saturation and it will happen again #they were supposed to have clothes on idk where it went it just disappeared #the dragon prince #fanart #tdp viren #viren #aaravos #tdp aaravos #harrow #tdp harrow #tdp #virrow #viravos #idk how to call it

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hgrve · 9 months

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#harringrove #billy hargrove #steve harrington #i disappear i come back i disappear again #billy is still my baby girl tho don't worry :)#i just don't have a lot of time to scroll tumblr and i feel bad just posting and not reblogging people's stuff :/#i also have no idea what's going on in billy fandom when i'm not on tumblr #*mine

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autism-swagger · 8 months

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Okay but like. There's literally video and photo evidence of Jamie being in 1987. She's literally in the yearbook. How the fuck did her parents not remember and/or recognize her.

#and like yeah yeah it's been 35 years BUT I THINK THAT WOULD BE PRETTY MEMORABLE #do you think that one day her parents are going through their yearbook reminiscing about that weird exchange student #who helped them defeat a serial killer and then completely disappeared without a trace #and then they get to the photo from the party and they're just like 'what the fuck'#like she literally just got on a carnival ride and never got off 😭 they all saw her get on 😭😭😭#Jamie tag #horror tag #og fandom post tag #totally killer #jamie hughes

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starboysbrainrot · 6 months

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slow dance with you.

#mystery incorporated #scooby doo fanart #scooby doo mystery incorporated #sdmi #scooby doo #brad chiles #ricky owens #LOOK #I KNOW THAT I DISAPPEARED FROM THE SDMI FANDOM #ONLY TO COME BACK TO POST SOME YOUNG RICKBRAD STUFF #BUT LISTEN #I drew so many dance poses in AT fan arts that it ended up giving me ideas for some sdmi art #so yeah #my art : sdmi

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tortoiseguy · 2 months

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I think people are too obsessed with "canon" and trying to use source material to justify certain readings of the characters that were intentionally placed there by the author. You'll have characters very obviously written to be gay with so many allusions to the fact in their behavior and story themes and people will be all pissy it isn't "canon". As though having that arbitrary title slapped on will make the reading any more valid.

Like idk man I think if the writer puts a bunch of obvious gay sub text in their story, then maybe it being gay is already canon. Having the writer of the cool media you enjoy officially saying "ya its gay btw 😉" doesn't make your queer readings any more valid than they already are.

#this post is about marcille and falin in dungeon meshi btw #i saw a lot of people talking about events in the story as though they somehow disprove the fact that marcille is VERY OBVIOUSLY a lesbian #like its not even subtext that marcille is in love with falin its straight up how her and falins relationship is written #you dont need ryoko kui staring at a camera saying marcille and falin are dating for it to be true #dungeon meshi anime #dungeon meshi #dungeon meshi marcille #marcille donato #falin touden #fandom #vi and caitlyn also have this problem of the fact that its not said explicitly makes the fact that theyre obviously written to be romantic #disappear suddenly

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amoonfullofstars · 5 months

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im not crying over this scene a key just entered my eyes🙂👍🏻👍🏻

#wdym that even benjamin horne thought harry wouldve liked receiving that key #“harry would like to have it as a memento”#???😭#what happened to harry after cooper disappeared #i mean i just know he turned into a miserable mess #and people noticed even benjamin horne???#now if you excuse me ill go crying in a corner #i miss my parents so much pls #one day this fandom will jail me for my trucoop sad posts #dale x harry #trucoop #twin peaks the return

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cnidarianrui · 1 month

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so you know how rui has always been curious about the plushies in the wonderland sekai (and the aliens in april fools event)? imagine a small rui, regressed in the sekai, curiously wandering up to the plushies! he always has a sense of wonder and curiosity about him, but it's so much stronger when he's little, and the plushies are just so interesting!'

anyways, so he goes up to the plushies and picks them up asking if he can study them!! but even the plushies can tell he's small, so what do they do? play!

they play "scientist" as rui calls it, where he investigates the plushies and tries to find out how they work!!! thankfully when he's small he's less inclined to cut them open, and more inclined to pet them, hug them, and ask them every question his brain can come up with!!

after over an hour of playing, the plushies notice rui is "investigating them" with less intensity, rubbing his eyes, and yawning...

within a few minutes, the plushies and rui are now somehow, with absolutely no possible explanation, curled up in the show tent, kaito's coat draped over them. :)

#project sekai agere #sfw agere #fandom agere #project sekai #mine ★#WAHHHHH HIII IM BACK 😆😆#i disappeared again.. huhu. haven't had many ideas for posts #but i wanna come back!!! i'll try to post more frequently!!

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dadbastiandisaster · 6 months

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Sebastian would love the no purpose flour post. Modern AU Ciel would show him it once and I think he’d talk about it for days afterwards. It’s been a week and he’s still like ‘oho so glad to be making pasta with this purposeful flour, unlike the flour that person from the internet was sold’. Ciel regrets ever showing him

#black butler #kuroshitsuji #sebastian michaelis #i disappear for weeks and come back with this #other people contribute actually meaningful stuff to this fandom #and i post this #actually on second thoughts mey rin is the one most likely to have tumblr #so maybe it was mey rin #original post

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fisheito · 2 months

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Bottom yakumo fics i rotate thru bc the tag is playing games with me

EIDEN:

(Sequel) https://archiveofourown.org/works/49270402

(locked) https://archiveofourown.org/works/37453975

(locked) https://archiveofourown.org/works/48090496

KUYA (some dubcon+yaku whump):

ASTER:

QUINCY:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/54831790

EDMOND: https://archiveofourown.org/works/52916077

NOT EXPLICITLY BOTTOM, BUT FITS THE SUBBY ~FEELING~

https://archiveofourown.org/works/37413112

(locked) https://archiveofourown.org/works/49106176

https://archiveofourown.org/works/50601046/chapters/128881948#workskin

#is it ok to link locked fic like this? do they not wanna be perceived? if it's not ok i'll just uhh... disappear them from the list #eehehehehe sometimes i just get into moods where bottom yakumo is where it's at #like. specifically bottom yakumo. EXCEPTIONALLY subby yakumo.#no twisting the game to overpowering his partner at the end. that's the bott-to-top yakumo pipeline that fits a DIFFERENT specific mood! :}#eventually i'll exit the bottom mood and dive into topyaku fic and we continue the cycle anew #because... ultimately..... switch yaku is my everything (my agenda and preferences are visible from outer space)#anyway yeah this stuff is all on the hornier side. there are bottom yaku fics that i like that are more plot and char-heavy #but this is the list for when i wanna see him whimpering and begging and crying etc etc you know the post i'm talking about #i started compiling this list because i tried filtering for bottom yakumo and got like. 8 fics #i whispered... i've been living off 8 fics ? Only? i mean that's a lot given how small the fandom is but i feel like i'm missing some #anyway there ended up being more than 8 (that i would reread) so i was quite content with my findings #maybe i'll update it if i see more. hmm. i hope i'll see more #bottom yakumo reading list #i am reading words and acting in ways #nu carnival yakumo

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elvisabutler · 22 days

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"Elvis, I can't- I can't accept this." Lilly's response isn't what Elvis had wanted to hear but what had he been expecting? For her to welcome it without a question? His gaze practically pins her to the countertop as her hands run over the simple cotton. "It's too much." You shouldn't spend this on me. "It's not. It's- it's- do you like it?" Elvis swears he almost stutters when he asks the question and winces. "Doesn't- who else would I spend money on?" He’s a man getting on in age and besides Charlie’s kids- besides the kids he watches at the daycare, who does he have to spoil? He may not be rich by any stretch of the imagination but he has some money and no one to enjoy it with. Truthfully, he knows if he could Lilly wouldn’t want for a single material thing. If she asked? He’d provide.

#ally writes #elvis presley #elvis presley fanfiction #spark universe inspo #spark #spark universe #( shh i know a good portion of everyone moved to mota and other fandoms but shhh i'm gonna finish this. )#( but also i wrote far too much while trapped at the car dealership today. )#mine #drops this and promises to not disappear for longer than a day or two this weekend.#( listen even if i'm not posting promise i take peeks at things. )

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lost-immortality · 8 months

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Everyday can be mermay if you believe hard enough

#my art #mermaid #artists on tumblr #original art #not me posting something not fandom related after disappearing for 23465 years

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moupies · 6 months

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Heyyy guysss it’s meeeee

Bonus wukong under the cut

Okay that’s all

#I did. this for a school project and I liked it and decided to return from my disappearance #lmk macaque #lmk #lego monkie kid #lego macaque #pies occasionally draws!!#IM BACK (lying)#sorry if you’ve moved on from lmk and this is a jumoscare #lmk fanart #lmk fandom #lego monkie kid macaque #I lvoe this ep sm the screenshot redraw was inevitable #now that I’m back who’s exited for me to be annoying about s4 #unfollow while you still can #hey wait is this the first full peice ive posted here? WAIT

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vegaseatsass · 4 months

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My Rosh Hashanah resolution was "get back on tumblr" and my Gregorian New Year's resolution was "get back on tumblr" and now it is late January and I'm getting back on tumblr because I just watched Dead Friend Forever Ep 5 and need to go insane with other people about Non and the potential for Non/Jin/Phee..........

#and also tee's vegas spiral #make us hate him makes us love him i am READY #dead friend forever #dff #no but fr so sorry i disappeared for like eight months i had a plan for a post i could make about the way my job is destroying me slowly #but i dont want to talk about it!!! i just want to talk about FANDOM #which ive MISSED SO MUCH #i have felt EMOTIONALLY EMPTY FOR ALMOST A YEAR NOW #INEED THIS WEBSITE #dear diary

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