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synesthete-sylke · 9 months

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i wanted to make a journal-themed entry for the victory curse, since i have smajor brainrot all of the time and i felt like it was a somewhat missed opportunity for angst :]

plus it's a cool concept, if people like it i might do the canary curse and a few others!

(shoutout to my brother for doing the 'laurel' and then proceeding to fail every other word he tried-)

text under cut because i was going for style, not legibility :P

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The "Victory" Curse

Top: Cursebearer and allies are predisposed to victory in the Life games; often results in repetitive loss of allies or partners, as well as those who See attempting to take advantage of the cursebearer. Strong-willed and fiercely loyal, even to the death.

Note: Curse is warded off but not cancelled by Canary curse; effects unknown. Range is possibly extended?

Side: Resists Boogey curse!

Photo: Current recipient is aware; has become sacrificial and borderline su*cidal.

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uncanny-tranny · 6 months

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The worst lie you can believe and be told is that women are emotional and men are logical, that men's, essentially, men's emotions are logical and neutral while women's are not, and are in fact frivolous and shallow.

#feminism #i have 'discovered' that men ARE just as (if not more) emotional than women...#...but that their emotions are never called emotions. so many are so fundamentally separated from their own humanity that they believe...#...that the are not emotional. that they are as neutral as they think machines are. that they are as logical as the terminator...#...so you get these people who are so separated from their own humanity because they are told that to be a man is to not be human...#...and that women are made lesser FOR the humanity of having emotions and being ~in tune~ with them...#...and that even if women have emotions that is a flaw because being a person is a flaw you should cover up...#...so 1. punish women and 'women' for having emotions in any violent way...#2. punish men and 'men' to the extent they themselves are almost convinced they aren't human #i've found that as i grow up i recognize how powerful that can be to control people if there is higher authorities in place #not to get conspiratorial but i definitely think that institutions like the military REQUIRE this shit #because it is about separation from yourself and replacing that humanity with everything else #separate yourself from the humanity of emotions and replace it with the personality of the fucking terminator

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curly-cottage-girl · 3 months

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if exercise is supposed to help stress than why is my blood pressure still high!! I have fantastic cardio health now but my blood pressure is still in the high range. I cannot win

#literally most of my doctors advice boils down to ‘reduce stress’#and it’s not even in a dismissive way like that’s genuinely the root of a lot of my problems!!#the problem is!#the stress is just There!!#whether I feel it emotionally or not!#it’s just an ever present part of my subconscious physical self I gues!!!#🙃#how am I supposed to fix my health problems !!!#granted I haven’t discussed my blood pressure with my doctor (and it’s not super high just like. higher than it should be)#but it’s frustrating to see exercise definitively improve my health in one way but not do anything for other problems #ugh #if trying Cereset in a few months doesn’t work then #I just #idk what #ccg rants

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xenon-demon · 9 months

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also. tell me more about your Kas!Eddie please 🙏

ohhhhh Lui gravity is the AU that has just. grabbed me in its jaws and will not let go. I think about it CONSTANTLY and I don't think that will stop anytime soon. I've got a few asks about this one though so I'll START with talking about What's Going On In Hawkins circa the start of the fic. If you would like to know more about The Boy, Kas!Steve, then may I direct your attention to this post :D

So Eddie and Steve swap places right before the final fight, because Steve is injured at that point and Eddie isn't (and they figure staying at Eddie's trailer will be less dangerous that going to the Creel House). Everything else from that point proceeds as in canon; the bats get in, Steve dies, Max dies temporarily and the four gates connect and drive a massive rift through Hawkins.

From there, Hawkins basically descends into a semi-apocalyptic nightmare. The rift from the end of season 4 has caused major structural damage all over town, many buildings have been destroyed and lots of people have either evacuated or had to move into a local motel that's been converted into emergency housing for the people of Hawkins (that's where the Munsons are now staying). On top of that, the rift has basically destroyed the structural integrity between the Upside Down and our world; while the rift itself is not really a functional gate, there are a bunch of smaller gates randomly opening up around town now. More and more of them show up as time goes on. Some are small (think like the tree Nancy goes through in S1), some are much bigger (think bigger than Eddie's trailer roof gate), and most of them tend to fluctuate a bit in size/fade in and out of existence. This means that some creatures from the Upside Down are starting to bleed through these gates and end up in Hawkins looking for food.

The government, realizing everything went to shit the moment the rift opened up, rolls into Hawkins about 3-4 days after the "earthquake" saying they're here to "help with the relief efforts". (For those keeping score at home, yes this is after Team Russia & Team Cali have arrived back in Hawkins.) The official government cover story is along the lines of "hey, remember when HNL got shut down a few years back after that tragic chemical leak incident? Well, we've just discovered that a Rogue Individual (Brenner) was secretly dumping toxic chemicals and experimental materials into the local wilderness/burying them underground instead of disposing of them properly. This is the cause of the geological weirdness and mutated wildlife that some people are reporting. Everyone should leave Hawkins immediately if they can, and comply with any and all government orders if they can't". Not everyone believes this, of course, but the truth is so much more insane that most of town is at least willing to go along with it - and that's not counting the people who just up and leave because Hawkins is so super duper cursed at this point.

The main things the government is doing are:

regular patrols around the border of town and known gate hotspots, to catch and kill any UD creatures before they're spotted by civilians

nighttime curfew; you shouldn't be out after sundown unless you are going Directly from wherever you were during the day (i.e. your job) back to your home. you're not gonna get ARRESTED but the military will absolutely Escort You back to your house lmao

urging citizens to stay the fuck away from any weird sightings and report them to the armed forces as soon as possible, so the military can handle it

and yeah, they kind of are helping with the relief efforts in that they're making sure food and other important supplies are still getting into hawkins and making sure the recently-homeless have somewhere to stay, but they're doing the bare minimum really asfjknjvkdan

Essentially, as of the start of the fic (approx. a month after the rift opens up/the end of S4) the situation is this: Eleven and the Party know that in order to fix this, they have to defeat Vecna first and THEN close up any existing gates/the rift. (They also have a strong hunch that the Upside Down is Like That due to Vecna's influence.) The government officials in charge of the Hawkins occupation Do Not Believe That Is The Solution, and instead spend a lot of time wasting Eleven's time and energy by forcing her to close up gates as they appear. Between that and the fact the Party can't just storm into the Upside Down to get Vecna without a solid plan and probably armed back up, they're all feeling kind of hopeless about how to actually fix this. Especially since tensions are rising in Hawkins by the day, and the gate/monster sightings are only getting more and more frequent...

Send me an ask about my WIPs!

#charlie writes things #steddie #steddie au #gravity (kas!steve au)#vampire steve harrington #also idk if the government stuff is good/realistic at all #because while i think col sullivan would be forced to admit at this point that the upside down Is a thing and this isn't all just eleven #idk how willing he'd be to just work with her and the party #i'm leaning towards 'sullivan has been forced to play nice with owens under threat of punishment due to his mismanagement of the situation'#'and he is now leading the occupation of hawkins under guidance from owens. but he is NOT happy about it'#'and while owens will work with the party/eleven sullivan is completely disregarding their (correct) thoughts on how to fix this'#sullivan's like 'if eleven isn't responsible for this then she should close these gates/the rift and fix this for us'#and eleven is like 'you're treating the symptoms and not the cause in order to truly fix this we must kill vecna'#and sullivan's like 'vecna schmecna i still think this is your fault but i believe you're playing nice atm and also if i kill you now #i'll be dishonorably discharged for disobeying orders from my higher ups'#idk if anyone has thoughts about this feel free to let me know #i'm very open to ideas/soundboarding for how to make this feel realistic #because i want the 'borderline post-apocalyptic/a lot more people Know now but hawkins as a whole is at least pretending to be normal' vibe #the secret is not Out In The Open but it's definitely much less hidden than it used to be.

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adorablegorilla · 11 months

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It took me until now to realize that Aak buffing Ebenholz is actually way less efficient and impactful than just using Warfarin. I feel like it should have been obvious but in my defense I was high on the satisfaction of assembling a proper Buff Squad

#arknights #arknights ebenholz #you want Ebenholz to one-shot so the increased attack speed does nothing for him other than helping him build up charges #which in most situations you should already have fully built #it's very unlikely you'll ever find yourself in a situation where the increased speed makes a difference #and since Warfarin already has a higher damage multiplier not only is she easier to use she's straight up better #you could use both but that would be VERY cumbersome to set up and probably unnecessary... that said I am definitely gonna try using both #definitely unnecessary in 90% of situations but the numbers would be fun

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kaylor · 8 months

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Genuinely would love to know your album ranking 💛

i truly don't really know if i have an official ranking because there's such a difference between which albums i think are good and which ones i listen to most often/find most enjoyable so i guess i'll give you both. i put a lot of thought and time into this, got my calculator out and everything.

best to worst (as an Album, this has no bearing on individual songs)

1989

folklore

fearless

speak now

debut

reputation

red

evermore

lover

midnights

fav to least fav (% of fav songs, deluxe editions, excluding piano versions and demos/acoustics)

1989

folklore, speak now

red

reputation

fearless

debut

evermore

lover

midnights

fav to least fav (% of fav songs, standard editions)

speak now

1989

red, folklore

fearless

reputation

debut

evermore

lover

midnights

one day i'll make a proper spreadsheet with weighted columns to properly objectively determine my favourite album. this was literally just % of songs i think slap. but not all bangers are made equal.

#this was really fun and definitely took up way more time than i thought it would #i also definitely accidentally counted mtr as a top song and i don't think i should have because i always skip it #but it's also so important for the lore #so folklore is a little higher than it should be #but also maybe not

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kaeyaphile · 6 days

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hello everybody thanks for checking in i’m still a piece of garbage still suffering from brainrot regarding a set of pixels named aventurine

#kayleigh.txt #got higher than ever before yesterday and it felt so good i felt so relaxed and my chronic pain was practically gone 😭#definitely going to ask my psychiatrist if medical mj is something we should try 🤔#aNYWAYS i still love aventurine (and kaeya obviously they’re basically on the same level just... different games lmao)

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fischlcatgirl · 10 days

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Board certified abyss 12 HATER

#‘oh youre just bad at it’ i am bad at it because its bad game design. i rest my case #im not even bad at it. i could definitely clear and 36 star if i wanted to. however i should not have to take 40 shots at thr same content #trying to random luck my way into mashing the right set of buttons and miaculously not getting hit because the hp pools are too high to lose #a single percent of your dps bringing a healer or. for that matter. actually healing.#this is i think why Neuvillette has such a good rep. hes basically invincible at c1 which means you #dont have to retry the same chambers over and over because he keeps getting one-shot. because lets all look into our hearts at this moment #his damage is not that much higher than any other dps character’s damage. he just also heals and fits into the current meta #people used to say the same shit theyre saying about neuvillette about nahida #and once natlan comes out the meta will change once again. hp builds will once again become unnecessary in abyss. bennet will make a #reemergence. overload meta will become real. there will be one character who is good to use in burgeon teams theyll be burgeon nilou. this #is my natlan prediction #part of it anyway #and then we will get shneznaya and there will be a character who does damage based on how high you can get their crit over 100% but they #wont be that meta theyll be like cursed with low modifiers. but nonetheless the meta will change again.#im in a love hate relationship with the genshin meta because it is in a love-hate relationship with itself #board certified my post #board certified metaposting

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dayurno · 20 days

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what's your aftg charas ranking? kevi is first but then what... is it drew or jean or a secret third thing

ITS HARD AND IT CHANGES i think after lazarus renee definitely kicked andrew out of the top 3 (but im sure he will be back when jean is no longer a deranged hater) so it would look quite like this

1. kevi

2. jean

3. renee

4. andrew

5. neil

6. seth

7. aaron

8. allison

9. riko

and then after that i either dont care enough to have a specific ranking or the placing is situational 🫡 if jeremy is any fun he might get an entry but it will depend on how entertaining his little dance will be

#i have a hard time discerning favorite from ‘entertaining’ and interesting’#like i think jean im pretty fond of and entertained by but i dont know if im interested in him beyond this small abstract of his life #and riko im plenty interested in and entertained by but i dont have any favorable feelings towards him #actually thinking about this ranking now i feel like renee is definitely above jean because i am more interested in learning about her than #i am about him #but i dont know if this just lends itself because i dont like jeans punching bag role in the narrative #oh well #asks #also i feel like seth should be higher but it felt weird putting him above neil

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tinylittlebab · 1 year

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2/10/23

goal: 1000 / total: 821 / extra burned: 100 / net: 720 / weight: 94.5

disappointed in this. wouldve been less but i kinda blanked while eating goldfish and forgot to count them out bc i was too busy sorting them. oops. well its not that bad. i didnt end up getting to do my usual stuff so the day was very hard. i had planned to wait to eat till later or not at all but around 8pm i started feeling very ill and shakey so i decided to eat. unfortunate but whatever.

mad at myself for being hungry this morning since i had over 800 yesterday. my body is so pathetic. i fed it so much yesterday but even still.

#ugh. 821 thats so much i feel so bad #i know that ill still definitely lose weight if im eating that much daily but i feel pathetic for not going lower even when i wasnt #exercising. the main reason im able to maintain 97 and still eat 2000 a day is bc i exercise so much every day #my sedentary tdee is 1400 and i burn so much extra every day so it works out. i guess im lucky that my main coping mechanism that i use to #feel regulated and also happy (basically a hobby tbh) involves exercising. idk daydreams are more vivid when i skip around #makes me forget my body exists. and i do it so much that i burn a whole lot of calories #ugh. my body hurts rn. i should eat but idk what. should i go higher now and lower later or vice versa #im allowing myself to be ok with higher numbers today. nothing above 1100 but above 800 is ok #think its kinda silly that i always SAY my limit is 1000 but its actually not. but if i set my limit to anything less than im actually more #likely to meet it or go over. i more frequently get totals of 500 with this limit. i tell myself i can have a bigger meal later and then it #comes to bedtime and instead of eating i just go to bed. qhen its a lower amount i know i wont be able to eat anything larger so i am #doing way more counting of cals on everything to figure out what to eat later and it messes me up #and eating over 800 2 times a week isnt so bad. ill still lose weight. i feel bad tho. like im not disordered enough #but 800 is still a very small amount

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worldsofdreamers · 8 months

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.

#i don’t know if i should be sad or annoyed but I’m definitely a little frustrated that someone irl is mad that I put watching Louis #as a higher priority than answering a question they could probably have googled #I’ll help when i can and that’s arguably too much but not today #this time and space and feeling is something that I need to keep going. music especially this music has helped me in the worst #moments of my life it’s still not gotten through.#to some people no matter how much i say it that this music saved me and continues to everyday. but i guess i only matter when i can help ppl #and i know that’s not true but it’s how it comes off when he behaves like this #I’m just sad now.

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izzy-b-hands · 1 year

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Gave up on sr2 for the night because the AI is horribly befuckened rn and I had enemy gang members dropping out of the sky in their fucking cars, while the road refused to load and the camera slowed so I could no longer shoot and drive (the reticle moves so slowly that by the time it registers your character took a shot, the gun doesn’t actually fire at your target. If it sounds frustrating, just imagine playing it, it very much is !!!!!!)

Functioning Bideo Game asdfjaklsjfk

#text post #its ok sr2 is like a lovely old cat to me #sometimes she needs to take a break bc she forgot how to do anything but sleep fkldajfkaj #god this one fucking mission i replayed three times before I gave up bc i was supposed to be chasing down #and killing a rival lieutenant and their in a car and THE CAR WOULDN'T APPEAR #but i could see it on the map and anytime I got within four huge blocks of the map it would move like to the opposite side of the island #aka not possible and not what the ai should do during that mission #I went out in a firefight on top of a dock bc I lost four cars trying to still chase it down bc I'm stubborn to a fault #my level against the other gang kept resetting too which I think is part of why they kept appearing out of the sky #game would realise i should have a higher level than i do go OH FUCK and just shit out forty extra enemies when I only should have ten fdks #I'm not tired at fucking all so this does suck tho #bc all i want to do otherwise is write but my brain hasn't been letting me actually Words rn so #this is fine totally fine all good very fine definitely

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nexus-nebulae · 1 year

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really fucks me up how much i've been told that visibly showing symptoms of depression is inherently abusive

#cw abuse #cw suicide #cw self harm #currently we don't struggle with depression as much as we did in the past #we're at a point now where it wouldn't be a danger to us really at all #but i remember how much in high school i would refuse to tell people how i felt and what i wanted to do #because i was legitimately told repeatedly that telling someone else that you wanted to commit suicide was abusive #or that harming yourself was inherently abusive to those around you #not just in terms of things like 'if you don't do X i will harm myself' which can definitely be abuse #but just. overall. in general. for any reason.#which didn't make me want to STOP hurting myself. it did the fucking opposite #it made me isolate myself just to do that which in turn only fucked me up more #and it made me feel like i *should* get rid of myself because then that'd guarantee i wouldn't hurt people more #and even now i still feel like. crippling guilt over the fact that i ever even did those things in the first place #not to mention other headmates that don't hold body memories but still having similar exomemories also being fucked up by guilt #when literally we were not in full control of our thoughts or actions we were fucking mentally ill #our circumstances were horrible and people were hurting us simply because we expressed the fact that we were hurt in the first place #we were literally treated like telling someone 'hey i think i might harm myself can you help me to not do that' was abuse #and of course the shitty ex that i was with at the time decided to make it worse in her own fun ways too #so like everyone i asked for help just made it worse so i never ended up getting help until my mental health fully and absolutely collapsed #simply because. i was told. that my own mental illness hurt other people more than me #because their annoyance at me being sad was a higher priority than. you know. such overwhelming despair that i didnt want to live.

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kraniumet · 1 year

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another day of being gaslit by my isp

#called them again because I'm only getting 100/100mbps speeds on both wired and wireless connections #regardless if I'm using a router that supports 800mbps+ speeds / a 15m cat6 cable connected directly to my desktop / my work's macbook pro #it's actually super consistent so. that's something #and she was like :( looks like your desktop doesn't support higher than 100mbps wired speeds :(#and i was like. that doesn't sound right but sure lets test this macbook that according to apple should support gigabit ethernet. with an #adapter that also does. and it lets me pick 1000/1000 in the hardware settings. but i'm still only getting 100/100 on speedtests #and she was like. okay keep your computer connected like that the technicians will look at it i guess.#but looked up my desktop's specs just now because it seemed super odd that the (admittedly lenovo proprietary) gaming motherboard wouldn't #have gigabit ethernet when it hit 250 on wifi no problem at my old place. lo and behold. it definitely isn't hardware capped at 100 lmao

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soul-of-rei · 2 years

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i honestly just wanted to have one run for farming resources but i came across one of my favorite builds so far

#rei plays hades #hades game #i only had poseidon as my first keepsake bc i wanted his boon for increasing chamber rewards #but i wanted to try a thing. a chaos gate opened. and then it just upgraded from there HAHSHAHAHA #the game also was vv stubborn in mostly upgrading flood shot which just. absolutely melted every room and made the boss fights trivial #i only wished i could get the hermes boon where after you dashed you become faster #bc the run felt slower than it should have been without that #and it was what made me waste a death defiance on hades within the last 10 secs of the fight #but otherwise ✨️✨️ will definitely try to recreate it for higher heat runs AHSHSHAHA

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techmomma · 7 months

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Facts about your body after you turn 25, AKA things I wish someone had told me:

you will get hair in fun new places. this is normal and fine.

these places include (but are not limited to) if you don't already have them: your asscrack, your back, your ears, and moles. it's fine.

some of you, dick or not, will also lose hair. this is normal, but also if you have ovaries maybe get this checked out for PCOS.

your acne will probably change. some people get better. some people get worse. it's fine.

your nails will probably get an infection or a fungus at least once in your life. this is fine. (but also let your doc know).

how you gain and lose fat and where you do so will change. this is fine.

how you smell will change. this is fine. (fishy or rotten smells mean doctor time though)

if you have a prostate: it gets harder to pee. prostates enlarge as you age (get this checked regularly). this is fine.

if you do not have a prostate: it gets easier to pee but not in a good way. as in as you get older, your pelvic floor muscles tend to lose some of their strength. this makes it harder to keep pee in. this is fine.

all breasts and pectorals eventually sag, with the rest of your body. this is fine.

a decent percent of the population will experience a cyst at least once. some of you will make up for the rest with multiple. this is fine, but keep them checked out by a doctor. (sometimes this is a condition! get checked for that too!)

almost half of everyone gets hemorrhoids. it's a good idea to just expect them since your chances of getting them get higher the older you are. your toilet will look like a murder scene. definitely get your booty checked out BUT this is almost always perfectly normal. just eat more fiber. "but I already-" eat more fiber. and maybe suck it up and buy some hemorrhoid cream, you'll thank me later.

yes, this means you will probably need to make an appointment for a doctor to see your butthole. it's okay. not only do they really not care but 1. they've seen weirder that day and 2. they'd far rather you see them now than later when it's been going on for forty years and now it might be colon cancer. it's okay. consider it a rite of passage.

adults need more sleep than children. don't believe the myth that you need less than they do. that is capitalist propaganda to make you give up more of your life to the work grind, comrade.

vitamins and medicine, something you are more likely to take as you get older, sometimes make the toilet turn weird colors. it's okay.

if you still have your tonsils and get those little stones and get sore throats more than once a year you should plan on getting those suckers out before the tonsils cause an infection and go septic. if you're getting stones at all you should get those reevaluated every year, especially if the stones are bigger than a needlehead (or get bigger over time). it's gross and yucky. I don't care. get them looked at before you end up in the hospital.

you'll probably need to add foot support to your shoes if you don't already do. this is fine.

your body changes. sometimes it can feel sorta weird and upsetting that it isn't what it used to be. that is okay, and it is okay to be upset. just know that this is normal, it's normal to be upset or not upset, but don't let it hinder your quality of life. trans or cis, there is a certain level of acceptance you just gotta give your body and forgive your body for as you get older. it's okay.

it's okay. I promise.

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