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calypso-finale · 1 year

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Fifty Eight. Part 2

Watching Aziel walk back over to me with my phone in hand “you finished?” I asked him “you don’t want to see your dad no more?” he placed my phone on my lap, I chuckled “no more?” he shook his head and ran off “wow” picking my phone up from my lap “what did you do?” looking down at the phone, Oakley is laughing hard “I kept telling him wagwan and he kept saying no and then I said to him he is jarring, I asked if he missed me and then he was like enough of you, I don’t know” I pulled a face “I think he is right though, you are jarring, I mean come on. You act like you have no sense, I think he is not happy with you, you going to Thailand did it for him” I pointed “yeah” he dragged out, he is staring so hard and the way he dragged out the yeah, looking at myself “excuse me” lifting my top up and sitting back, he didn’t say a thing he just rubbed his face smiling “what happened?” he questioned “whatever” I mumbled “why are you on a single bed with no headboard, three pillows, where are you? I have been peeping the background, where are you now?” he got up from the bed “home” I pulled a face “you ain’t home so what is this?” he flipped the camera over, seeing a table with three candles on, his suitcase and literally wooden flooring “it’s home” he turned the camera back to him “don’t play me” I said to him “erm” he just said looking up “I have sold the house” I frowned “I am living in Wadz council flat, well apartment to make it make sense to you” my mouth fell open “where?” I questioned “where, mhmm erm” waving him off “you’re back in west, I can’t even with you, why can’t you act like your pay bracket? Are you serious, like bad enough you went Thailand, you got robbed you still haven’t got money and now you in a flat? A council one at that, I seen that, it’s the place you showed me when you picked up Wadz, no. You cannot see Aziel there, what are you doing?.”

I sound like I am nagging him “just hear me out, like for one second while you screaming. When you come back, I will come to you to see him, but I sold it because I didn’t like it really anyways. I just got it yeah, if it doesn’t make me happy I move. So I need a place to crash, once I get my things back, once the money from the sale come in, I will look for something better, I mean come on Rylee, it still wasn’t the nicest house, it was just a nicer area, I got you” least he is moving on from there “you promise me you are moving, kick your family out. You have them living nice!” he just looked away “you make me mad Oakley, you always do” he chewed his lip “I know, I am trying to change, are you going to France straight?” he asked “yeah, because of the shoot. The Nanny will be meeting me there, I am tired” I admitted “I will meet you there too, both of you” rolling my eyes “how you getting there?” he laughed “why you playing me, don’t worry. I should have my cards by then, I am a dickhead though, I have to get my card from the bank itself because the address I had was the home I sold” he just adds to his stupidity “fine, but you ain’t ever keeping Aziel if you do not do what you said?” I am making it clear “promise” he mumbled “I owe you though” he smiled “you owe me nothing” shaking my head “don’t do that, please” I huffed out, the fact this man is sleeping in a single bed with no headboard “you’re making me mad, I am going” I said, he laughed “don’t even laugh, bye” disconnecting the facetime “I get why you got mad” I said to Aziel.

Walking outside the yard, I bought my friends to my parents home and my mother has done a little BBQ for them, some music and whatever it’s sweet, they are so happy “why isn’t Debbie doing this?” I pointed; my dad is on the BBQ “why are you acting like you haven’t ate my food? I can do this shit you know” walking over to my dad “I am just saying” he looks offended “sorry” I laughed “you will be sorry soon; do you have to go?” I cooed out, hugging my dad “I know, your best daughter will be missed” my dad hugged me close “I know, you know that. I am happy that you are happy, I think I am more at peace for you to go anyways” moving back from the hug “I am more at peace to come here, I feel like I don’t have that notion of they will come to see him, that I won’t be pressured into silly things so yeah, I feel like I am ok to you know be a better me” my dad smiled “growing finally, you heard what Monica said to Ti new boyfriend, Ti was saying that she goes, he is invited to Barbados, I have been married to your mom for years and I didn’t get no personal invite” rolling my eyes “oh boy, you know the ones they hate are the better ones. Who cares, you love mom, and she loves you, who cares about momo, so is he going?” he shrugged “not bothered, last place I will be going too but Robyn is excited, she said Taylan is a good guy and yeah” my dad paused “yeah?” I said “you got something more to say” he placed his hands on his hips “nothing, just he got the seal of approval from the women, they are just seeing a tall man that plays football, women” he laughed “yeah” I mumbled “I have no issues with him, I just have my own shit, but he seems nice. I think if we meet again we will get on, Ti is happy so that makes me happy. She seems so smitten with him” I said “very, they made a groupchat, and I didn’t like it, I said no, I muted it really. It’s erm, Ti, Taylan, mom, me, Imani and Junior and I said Rylee? And Ti said oh she won’t like it, she is busy, your mom already has his number, like just yeah. Maybe he is a good guy, but I want no parts, I am just watching” I pulled a face “why wasn’t I put in? Does she think I would be jealous? I mean whatever, I am not upset about it, just confused” I laughed “I love you Rylee and I just want to say whatever happens around you, don’t let it faulter the growth you have made, I am watching all my kids, you can be in any country, and I know, in my heart I know. You have the bestest friends around you, I like them guys, they care about you and Aziel so much, I hear them talking to you, they are good people and that is making you a better person too, so whatever is happening around you Rylee do not let it affect you” reading between the lines, my dad doesn’t want me to care for what happened “I understand, and I won’t” smiling at him.

Diji sat next to me on the lounger “this is life Rylee, life!” he spat “you loving it aren’t you” I smiled “this is fucking amazing, like this shit seems like it’s a dream, I am here talking to Rihanna, man she was my crush when I was a kid, she is there and my nigga Chris, bro. I just don’t know, like you know I don’t do the most but this is the most I am doing. Just wow, and you doing this” pushing him lightly and shushing him “stop, like I said it’s been years and you all have taken care of me, you all have and yeah, if I can make you all memories with me, I will. You guys are my family in London” Diji smiled at me “it’s funny because Aziel is like my own son, Lillian was saying it because he did some stupid shit, and I just told him off, she goes you acting like he is your own son, I love him” I cooed out “I knew you guys love him when you all put him apart of the plans, but we need to have more time in LA, and we can just you know do more. I have enjoyed showing you places, taking you to the major food places” Diji gasped “sorry my moment was walking into Giorgio Baldi with your mom!” he screamed out, I busted out laughing “you know I seen this shit for years and my god, I am there, I am there in those paparazzi pictures, I have niggas texting me like you rich, rich? Nah it’s been an experience and your family have made us feel welcome here and we appreciate it, I am over it now. Your mom is the homie” smiling at him “she is alright” rolling my eyes “she is mom to you, so you going to feel like that, I seen her anger” he kissed his teeth “I was like oh nah, I am going” I am glad he knows my mom and her little outbursts “but we love you and that’s it” that is so sweet of him, Diji and Colin, they are both the most amazing men “has the baby father made a move?” pulling a face “huh?” I said “I am asking if he has, my guy is sending flowers, complimenting you, my guy is making moves, I know he is” I chuckled “I don’t know, I mean he barely knew me and he gave me a cartier bracelet and flowers, then he just stopped” I shrugged “he probably thought what the fuck he doing, acting like a simp, roadmen move mad you know. You lucky he loves you, because yeah” he laughed, but I think I should be.

Imani took a picture of us all outside “Amerie, take another one of us” she said passing her to Amerie, Imani ran around to get in the picture, Imani wrapped her arms around me “smile” Amerie said, that was so random, and it made me laugh “one more time, this time say we outside!” Amerie knows, she has been out personal photographer for a while now “we outside!” we spat “done! These are some lovely pictures” she complimented “hugging me?” I said to Imani “well, you are going so yeah” she sat down “you have mom, see she loves me more then you” my mom side eyed me “if like you’re the star attraction” I smiled at my mom, she knows I am “so what is happening with you Imani? Are you still thinking about things? No rush” I said, “I think I want to do singing, I do but like what if I am not good enough?” I sniggered “shut up, oh my god. Imani, you used to sing every time, you used to sing what’s my name like your life depended on it, I swear you are good. I would never do that to you or lie to you, you have mom and dad, the best teachers in life. I would honestly use mom, use her knowledge and love, our parents wouldn’t do that to you, I think you should Imani” I don’t know why she is nervous “you’re right, mom and dad are the best teachers aren’t they” nodding my head “if I was wanting to sing, I would be going to them two, best in the game” Imani smiled a little “just feel a little lost but you’re right” slapping her leg “I am right stupid” I said, I am always right.

From: Oakley

What u saying? Texting me now I see 😀

To: Oakley

Don’t flatter yourself! I just wanted to check you haven’t been killed seeing as you want to live in the hood

From: Oakley

I’m alive but u ruined my moment. I was just watching porn uno

I groaned out, he’s literally nasty and I don’t know if he’s lying or not, maybe I should test it because I don’t believe it.

To: Oakley

Send proof?

I know he’s outside with his little friends, he’s a liar, locking my phone laughing I just know he’s a liar. I’m packing for tomorrow and I just thought I would check to see he’s ok, oh he’s messaged me back with a voice note, I hate them. Playing the voice note “I know you haven’t seen my dick in a few but please” he’s such a liar “pfft give me a break, I bet it’s infected at this point and a mess bushy” pressing send, he can’t fool me with that, he’s on it today “Aziel, no, you do not make a mess” he was about to throw my clothes on the floor, looking at the message and he’s sent a picture, I just froze laughing, now I’m scared actually “do you have a spare case here?” Lillian asked “and why are you laughing? Psycho” I giggled “I’m teasing him, he said I’m interrupting his play time and I said he’s a liar but he’s sent me a picture and now I’m scared” Lillian cackled “open it then” I scoffed “what if it is?” Looking at her “are you scared of penis?” Shaking my head opening it and I yelped out “oh my god, he’s nasty!” I shouted “no!” I clicked on call as my phone fell out of my hand “you come to finish it off?” He answered and Lillian screamed laughing “shut the fuck up, stop. Right, Lillian. I’ll get you another” she shook her head “girl, you do you. Aziel come with” that is stressful “you’re stressing me out, I thought you are lying” he chuckled “I’m bored, I’m broke, no home, no girl, no nothing. I have a hand and some dreams” I sniggered “you have the white girl” he kissed his teeth “are you just laying there with your dick out talking to me?” I asked, “well you ruined it!?” He spat “I asked if you was ok my god! Sorry” I apologised “yeah well there is no white girl, never was she was there, a groupie. And besides she had me questioned for being violent so fuck her, what about you? Are you red? Flustered? Clutching pearls” I scoffed “you know what, shut up. I’m going now” he laughed “appreciate it though, checking in on me” I sighed out “can’t help but do that, I care but didn’t know you was being nasty” Oakley is laughing, he should be ashamed “I’m actually flabbergasted you said that, aren’t you the one that likes ears, like weren’t you always on a daily basis making out with my ear” putting the phone down on him, I’ve had enough, he is so annoying. He of course called back “Oakley you’re nasty, you’re laid out on a bed with no headboard doing that” he laughed out “I put it away but hear me out yeah, I want to see you like” he said “you are so light hearted you know, that makes me happy. You seem so happy about things, did you do a lot of soul searching” he is so light hearted “I did, I also got a Thai massage, and it made me better” rolling my eyes “is that way of you saying you had sex with Thai ladies?” I bet he did “no! Hell no, but hear me out because realistically yeah, you know earlier. I was a little turned on seeing something on FaceTime and I kept thinking about it” he’s making me go red “but I like it, the Oakley I knew. You changed when you got me” he went silent on the phone “I know, anyways, I’ll go, leave you alone. I think I made you red enough yeah, I know you Rylee, remember that. See you soon yeah” he knows I’m red, I am “right, how are you getting there with no money?” He’s so random “Wadz, and then you can pay for me when we see each other” I chuckled “broke ass, goodbye” disconnecting the call, he’s stupid.

Walking down the steps “surprise visit?” I said seeing Ti and Taylan “well I knew you was going back, and I wanted to see my nephew” I cooed out “I mean we are going in an hour, hi Taylan” I waved “hey, nice to see you in a better vibe” he’s got a point, I’ve been moody “sorry, lot on my mind, so good to see you” hugging Ti “likewise, I was so jealous of that picture, I missed a whole BBQ too, I hate you” I chuckled “sorry, I mean I wasn’t to know, mom just came out with it and said before you go, you’re friends and you just come to the house and we will cook, but it was so good. So much fun” moving back a little “sit down, welcome to my home” I gestured “you’re back in LA quick” I didn’t know she was here “well we are going to have a little break away Santa Monica, but I said that I want to see Aziel before we go there” letting out an oh “that is cute” sitting down on the couch “Aziel is currently upstairs, Halle. Can you tell Colin to get Aziel, my sister wants to see him” she smiled “sure” I sighed out “we are just packing right now, these girls have bought a lot and then mom and her Fenty haul” Ti laughed “oh god, she didn’t” nodding my head “what is that?” Taylan asked, “in the house mom has a room, it’s meant to be the library or study but it’s turned into a haul, it has Fenty everything, everything you need she has there, it’s her products so we call it Fenty Haul in the house” Ti explained “that is dope, I won’t lie” we are lucky to have mom.

Ti and Aziel are so cute “Tianna said you had high prospects, like you was the one” looking over at Taylan “what you mean?” I questioned “you was high in every class, but now it’s like you haven’t taken any of that, you think being mother has taken over that” looking at Ti “well Ti does it, who cares” I laughed it off “well she had too didn’t she, do you have prospects now?” who is this guy “Tianna said you was a real one in school” squinting my eyes “do you and Tianna talk about anything else but me?” I laughed “oh nah, I was just making conversation that is all. I think you’re a good person” I paused confused “uh thanks” that is so odd “have you been telling your man I have no prospects?” I asked her “what? No?” she said confused ��is Taylan talking too much, ignore him” looking over at him “I am not, I just asked what she does. Sorry if I offended you, I talk too much. Bit like your dad, he talks too much” I frowned “that is my dad, you’re just an outsider” he laughed “I am sorry, clearly I have offended you and I didn’t mean too” shaking my head “I don’t think I would let a man offend me, it’s all jokes” I smiled “yeah Taylan shut up” Ti added.

I am in France, I dropped off the rest but Halle remained with me and Kayson came on but we have just got here, I am jet lagged, I am tired right now “luckily I don’t need the nanny, I didn’t know you was coming here” looking out of the car window “neither did I but I said fuck it, France will be fun” I need come company “you sure his train wasn’t delayed, he is taking forever” Kayson got out of the car so he is here “oh I thought he was some random white man” nudging Halle laughing “I lied, I was looking at the wrong guy, he is actually a decent shade now” he still got that nice tan on him “daddy!” Aziel pointed “his broke ass” Halle mumbled “Bonjour” I said, he is laughing “Qui Qui and that” he climbed into the car “hey broke ass” he sat across from me “I’m sure Rylee has told everyone now” he knows I have “my guy, I missed you” Oakley dapped Aziel, he is so excited my son, he blew him a kiss “awww” Oakley went over to him “pull your pants up, what is your problem” Halle complained, looking at Halle “stop being jarring” he sat back down “I am joking with you Oakley, about the broke thing” Halle corrected herself “oh it’s cool, she says it anyways. How was the flight? Good yeah” he looked at me “yeah” I laughed “what’s funny?” How does he expect me to hold a straight face after he sent me that picture “share the joke” I shook my head “I refuse, but it’s nice you came. You get to see him do his thing” Oakley nodded his head “how you been? You look happier, has he told you that he lives in a council place now” Halle pulled a face “you’re asking for something to go wrong, you’re playing with fire, what the hell?” Halle spat “I have a plan, like honestly I do” he defended, he is stupid “does your plan include my sister” looking at Halle “in what sense?” I questioned her “I think Oakley and I make good friends, that is what we are now” looking at Oakley “yep” he nodded his head “aww well the besties can have the best time in France” Halle is so sarcastic “what you saying anyways?” I hate when he asks that “I’m saying nothing just certain images can’t leave my mind” he sniggered “same, I was minding my business too” pulling a face at him “I did nothing ok, you was looking” he’s so full of himself “you miss it though?” He said “not really, I actually like being a nun. Like I feel rejuvenated, a brand new person” Oakley laughed “oh brother” Halle said “get you a tall chocolate man” she added “yeah why not, she deserves happiness too” looking at Halle just laughing, she is a trip annoying him too.

#Chrianna #Chrianna FF #Fanfic #Fanfiction #Chrianna Fanfic #Chrianna Fanfiction

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dreamylyfe-x · 3 years

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Reactions: 11x06: Do Not Go Gently... (etc)

You know, I was going to do one of these for 11x05 and then I got so mad about the “Pollack” thing that I just couldn’t.

Shameless is such a challenging show in so many ways... because there is a lot of cringe a lot of the time and I am a delicate flower about those things. But... I do love it and so much of its strengths at this point are the performers and just the length of time we have been with these characters. And sometimes you really see that, and sometimes you frustratingly don’t, but this episode was much more the former than the latter.

I’m going talk about Carl right off the jump when I thought I was going to avoid talking about it at all because... not a topic I enjoy. If you don’t enjoy, I will keep it all in this bullet so it’s really skipable. I will see where I eventually land on it, because I am wary -- lots of bad consent on this show over the year and very little longterm exploration and all. But. I have seen a lot of sexual assault storylines over the years. I can’t readily remember if I’ve ever seen someone on a TV show have that moment where they feels weird, tell someone why, and get someone emphatically tell them that they’re right to feel weird, because they’ve been violated. That is something that is so common in life. I have unfortunately had more than one conversation with someone that took exactly that trajectory. There is so often this period of shock and uncertainty and people will then use that against people to demonstrate how they couldn’t POSSIBLY have been hurt. If they were going to tell a story about a sexual assault, I’m glad they did this -- something that they set up like “this is grey!” and then have Debbie say “It’s not grey. It’s a crime.” Weird to them basically SMASHCUT to a totally new topic but I will swing back around to that.

I like Debbie best with Sandy so this was a rough one for me with her.

Frank: WTF, why do I care about Frank’s story? They’ve set this up all season so it’s not a surprise, but... I dunno. Frank is awful. But he’s also an addict. And the thing I will always have empathy for on the topic of addiction is the way it can steal your life. What’s happening to Frank is scary and a direct result of an addiction which we have pretty much never seen him try to get out from under in any meaningful way. He has lost his life to it -- his potential, his relationships, his children -- and now he’s losing his mind. Just. Fuck.

Speaking of: Lip. WTF are you doing? I feel like, by the end of the episode, they’d made it clear that Lip is acting out. That he’s angry and frustrated and it’s making him do stupid and destructive things that aren’t actually going to add up to ANYTHING good for him. Which... Kinda classic of Lip. But those moments where Mickey is looking at him and is the voice of reason ... I mean, I love that. But Lip. That’s not a great look for you.

Once again, V’s story just sorta weird? Like active shooter drills being a replacement for gym class... Um. Wait. What is this story about, exactly? Gun violence or school funding? Or both? What are we doing?

Liam: Stop going to Carl with your problems. Christian: I love what you’re doing. Because boy do I feel Liam’s terror. And I’ll come back to that, too.

Gallavich! It was a Gallavich story where the focus was on MICKEY. Just... Wow. I literally didn’t think that was going to be a thing this year. We love to see it.

Mickey helping Lip rob Born Free... There are a lot of blanks in all of that, but he seemed quite integral to the operation, Ian clearly knew it was going down and Mickey seems to have primarily seen it as a way to do a thing for family. I love the Lip and Mickey relationship -- I love the history of it. I love that they’ve known each other since grade school and are completely different kinds of alphas. Lip has always had being the smartest in his back pocket, but Mickey often leaves him speechless by just being the most fearless. I love how there’s always been a bit of begrudging respect (and on Lip’s side, maybe a bit of sympathy) there and I love that the show let us have a moment where Mickey is going out to help Lip do crime and then coming back to the house with donuts for everybody. Just. Beyond my wildest dreams for season 11.

Speaking of “beyond my wildest dreams” -- that there would be some decent level of complexity with Mickey and Terry. I think a lot of that complexity was left up to Noel to convey -- but that’s a choice they’re making and I think it’s the right one. I loved Ian observing that this was the most Mickey ever talked about Terry, because that seems true. It’s a little nod, too, to when Ian desperately WANTED Mickey to talk about Terry and the fact that Ian has, for years, accepted that Mickey won’t. It’s in character for Mickey not to want to SAY a lot about his dad, and it’s also just a true fact that the writers can give Noel a non-verbal moment (or five) and get us as the audience what we need to understand about where Mickey is at. And that’s history, too. Because we have watched Noel let the audience see Mickey’s heart through nothing but his facial expression for 10 of 11 seasons.

One of those Milkoviches looks a lot like Jody, so that was weird.

So one of my less popular Shameless opinions is that it makes sense that Mickey is involved with Terry in season 10. For many reasons I won’t get into here, but one of them is just that... people who have been abused by their parents do tend to have some kind of relationship with those parents. Most of that is just the fact that Terry -- while being absolutely horrific -- is still Mickey’s father. And Mickey clearly struggles to completely shrug that off. He struggles with it in seasons 3 and 4, and he struggles with it now. He understands that he has every right. But. Mickey isn’t Terry. And that’s going to make it harder for Mickey to completely shut that door. Since Mickey actually DOES have empathy.

Ok -- everyone has and will say what I’m about to say, which is just: The scene on the couch was amazing. Being take care of is such a loaded issue for Ian. It was loaded enough that it broke them up in season 10. Ian might talk about being paralyzed, but he’s saying that knowing that he will have to rely on Mickey to take care of him sometimes. He knows Mickey knows that and he knows Mickey signed up for it. But it’s hard for him. I think Ian knows the answer to the question -- has to -- but he asks it to ground Mickey in the idea that they both have each other. Mickey isn’t going to end up like Terry. He isn’t going to be alone in his chair with every single member of his family satisfied to leave him on the curb in a hospital gown.

To take a step back, this is also why I love the prior scene on the sidewalk, because that is a lot of how Ian takes care of Mickey. I reblogged Gallavictorious’s post yesterday that talked about an accusation that the fandom promotes the idea Mickey is supposed to solve Ian’s problems. This is the show helping her rebuttal, because my gut response to that idea was “where is Mickey now if Ian hadn’t shown up and loved him the way he did?” -- and that moment on the sidewalk is an example of how that still impacts Mickey. That’s what Mickey sticks around for. To have someone standing right in front of him when he wants to do something that will blow his life up just saying “Don’t.” Like how powerful is it for Mickey to have someone care like that? Mickey doesn’t want to talk. That’s not how he wants to receive love from Ian. But I think it’s incredibly valuable and important that Mickey has someone telling him he doesn’t need to give up his life to punish his father. That Terry isn’t worth it and that Mickey’s life IS.

Back on the couch scene tip: How exhausted must Mickey BE at this point? He’s up all night helping Lip, then he’s driving with Ian all day. Just what a long 24 hours for this guy.

I love that Ian doesn’t chase Mickey when he gets up. That he follows, but he doesn’t seem alarmed. He seems to understand they are past the gun-to-the-forehead part of this experience.

I also love that Ian helps him. I’ve seen several people note that this is Ian observing Mickey’s boundaries and it is. But it’s also Ian pointing out that Mickey isn’t in this alone.

It WAS big of Mickey, Ian. I fully agree. Far beyond the call.

I think Ian’s been wanting to tell Mickey he’s better than that all day. But this was the moment where Mickey was most going to be able to hear it. 💕

Selling the house: Well, we are really getting to the “last season of Shameless” stuff. I get where Lip is coming from, when he looks at his options. I get Debbie’s reaction. I also understand, given Ian’s day, while he is IMMEDIATELY all in. I only have one question: WHAT ABOUT LIAM???? I’m already mad at all of you for not giving that kid a hug.

But. I mean, overall? Literally wanted to see that much Terry/Mickey stuff for years. I never thought it would get here, so I’m happy.

But oh my God. We’re halfway done. 😳

#of course I will always take more #but this was good #Save Liam #Shameless season 11 #Shameless 11x06

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unidentifiedflyingfks · 3 years

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Methy topic today, it’s Spun! I have a couple personal reasons for liking this movie so much, for one I love Brittany Murphy (8 Mile, King of the Hill) and also a fascination with drug dealer stories.

The viewer is first introduced to Ross, played by Jason Schwartzman, ‘he has a car’ and also an addiction to methanphetamine. Which he makes clear is the only reason he’s there, pulled up in front of a rundown house. Inside he is met by his dealer and head of then household Spider Mike. Spider is a shirtless, paranoid man that prefers to inject his meth and is idolized by neighborhood kids that steal petty items to trade to Spider for meth. Well, maybe just one kid, played by Josh Peck—yeah, he’s very young in this and literally named Fatboy.

Spider’s girlfriend Cookie, played by Mena Suvari, with rotten teeth and constipation, also lives in the house. She is temperamental and apt to boil over at any moment, as evidenced in the first scene when she lockers herself in their room and spray paints ‘loser’ on the wall after a fight. Teenage methhead Frisbee sits on the floor fixated on a repetitive video game. Seemingly the most levelheaded person in the house is Nikki played by my girl Brittany Murphy. She starts small talk with Ross and finds that his girlfriend, no, not girlfriend, sex buddy April also works at the strip club with Nikki. Ross makes sure to clear up that his actual girlfriend is working in the city.

As it turns out, Spider Mike can’t find his stash so Nikki offers Ross a hookup through her boyfriend, an older glam-cowboy cooking meth out of a motel room known only as ‘The Cook’ and played by Mickey Rourke (Rourke and Murphy would work together again three years later on Sin City). The couple takes note of Ross’s car, an apparent commodity, and indebts Ross to him for later use.

The first time he calls Ross is when Nikki’s dog gets sick because of the fumes in the motel room and she needs transportation to the vet. Ross and Nikki bond over this experience, despite The Cook’s on and off aggression towards Ross. Billy Corgan of the Smashing Pumpkins makes a cameo as the doctor.

Oh yeah, and the whole time he’s gone he’s left April handcuffed to his bed after a night of kinky sex. In his delirium he tapes her mouth and eyes shut with duct tape, blasts the radio, and leaves her. He returns briefly after the trip to the vet at which time she begs him to untie her and he refuses, retapes her, and tells her he will be back. He doesn’t think about her for days. Luckily she is saved by a suspicious neighbor who hears muffled noises. The leather garbed lesbian neighbor, played by Debbie Harry front woman of Blondie, bursts through the door and frees her, possibly blossoming into a new relationship for April.

Ross is called back to the hotel by The Cook after a fight with Nikki over a prostitute he ordered for them to share. On his orders, Ross takes her to ‘wherever she wants to go.’ While Ross and Nikki cruise around town together, it goes down at Spider Mike’s house. The also meth-fueled police assisted by Frisbee who is wearing a wire raid his home and arrest everyone. Frisbee is shot no lethally in the balls by Spider Mike. At the same time the lab in the motel explodes, with The Cook barely making it out in time. Police are hot on his trail while he attempts to hide in a porn shop. Another rock star, Rob Halford of Judas Priest, makes a cameo as porn store clerk.

When Ross or other characters get their fix throughout the movie frame time speeds up or becomes choppy and sequenced. The characters lose touch with reality and the audience is brought in on their deteachment, but with the reality of the horror that the characters are either unable or unwilling to see. Also ALL the characters in this movie are on meth, except for Ross’s ex girlfriend Amy and a couple minor very characters. That includes the convenience store attendants, one of which is pregnant, Fatboy, and the police officers that interrogate Frisbee—who do lines in their squad car before the raid. This makes Ross’s ex effectively the only voice of reason.

Ross and Nikki get very high, taking multiple hits while driving down the interstate then pour their feeling and delusions out to each other. It’s revealed that Nikki has a son, shocking and ironic since she’s paid so much attention to her little dog, but never mentioned a child. He was taken from her because of her addiction. It’s indicated that Nikki’s mother also has some kind of issue, hinting at a rough life for Nikki with problems either inherited or brought on by trama that has spanned generations. Ross has ruined the relationship with the girl he loves and, as far as he knows, left another girl captive in his room.

They both conclude that they aren’t hooked and could quit at any time.

Ross eventually drops her off at the bus station where she plans to make her way to Vegas. They share a kiss and it seems that in a different life, or place, they could have been together. But, probably never to meet again Ross waves her off then returns to run an errand with The Cook who is already planning to rebuild his lab.

Together the men drive to the city. The Cook doesn’t offer him much of a choice, but Ross does reluctantly agrees to go because it will give him a chance to see Amy, who he still calls his girlfriend. This is when he has the encounter with her, the only sober person in this whole movie, and if there is a heart to this film I imagine this is where it’s meant to lie. Twitchy and greasy haired, Ross meets Amy who walks up like this mythical being in a sleeveless dress. She knows instantly that he’s high, dismisses him as ‘spun’ and leaves. He does not see her again.

Meanwhile The Cook has been with high-falootin’ gay meth dealers who set him up with ingredients to start a new lab. With the new supplies, Ross and The Cook travel again this time into the country. On the way we’re treated to a grim monologue about The Cooks mom killing puppies she couldn’t care for. I realize it’s supposed to be some sad insight into his past and make him more sympathetic or whatever, but I didn’t feel it.

The movie ends as Ross sleeps in the car while The Cook works in a camper. The camper is ignited as he explodes another meth lab, this time reaching his heavily foreshadowed demise.

Pretty dark on paper. Pretty dark on screen too, but it keeps a comical feel through most of the screen time. Cookie struggling to take a poop while Spider jacks off in the other room to a sex phone line, the dog turns green, and an incident involving the tv show Cops to name a few. Crude humor, but it suits the gritty ultrasharp world of the film. In the end, it doesn’t look good for Ross or Nikki or any of the others, but it’s not over like it is for The Cook. It serves as a reminder that at least they didn’t get blown up. Thus leaving hope for these deeply flawed, but sympathetic characters.

Well there it is. Take from it what you want.

Remember that Josh Peck once played a kid named Fatboy who steals VCRs and does meth.

I give it 3.5/5 FFs

#cinema #film #movies #summary #movie analysis #character analysis #brittany murphy #josh peck #jason schwartzman #mickey rourke #mena suvari #patrick fugit #rob halford #judas priest #debbie harry #billy corgan #movie review #tubi #best scene

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onisiondrama · 4 years

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Greg & Newsweek Guy Stream (Stream 1 of 3 from 3/30/20)

Re-upload

Summary

Greg / James says Newsweek guy wrote an article about his dad and step mom and asked him for a comment. Greg responded “Go fuck yourself parasite.” Newsweek guy asks why he said that. Greg says that was just the mood he was in. He says gets asked a lot for an interview and after a while they seem like parasites because they make money off of drama.

NWG asks when was the last time Greg talked to his father. Greg says it was in Oklahoma City at a restaurant. He says he had bad fries. Says he was serving at tinker air force base in 2005. His father paid for his meal.

NWG asked why it’s been so long. Greg said because his father is an accused pedophile and because his father lied about what happened when he beat him up when he was 15. That destroyed their relationship and made Greg realize he was a liar and made him believe someone who was a child at the time who said they were a victim of his father and his two older female family members who have said they were molested by his father.

Greg says his father choked him, he beat his father’s ass, then his father lied to the police and other family members about what happened. NWG points out his father says he didn’t choke him. NWG asks how could his father have chocked him if he was in the front seat? Greg points out he has talked about this incident step by step in videos. NWG says he’s watched them all. Greg says NWG can know if he’s lying because NWG can base it off his head, but he (Greg) has to base this off memory. (I’m not 100% sure what he means by this, but I’m guessing he means since NWG recently watched all of Greg’s videos talking about this, he can see if Greg changes his story?)

Greg goes through the events. He’s blasting Rob Zombie in his ears. Greg wanted to finally fuck his girlfriend that weekend really badly. Debbie (step mom) decided to go on an impromptu trip to Tennessee. NWG asks didn’t Greg know about the trip for weeks? Greg says he did not, he even made plans with his girlfriend. They didn’t allow him to call her to let her know because it was back in the landline days, you can’t text. Just, “get in the car we’re going.” He was pissed off about it.

They were making their way to Kentucky. Greg says his dad is like Ned Flanders from The Simpsons and asked him to turn down his music. Says his dad is a real dorky guy, Ned Flanders is probably cooler than his dad. Greg flips him the bird with his left hand. He says he was either in the middle seat or the right side seat in the back. His dad asks, “what’s your problem?” Greg says, “it’s your fucking bitch wife. She fucking ruined my plans.” His dad contains his anger, pulls off the highway. He had a white Nissan. He pulls into the parking lot, takes off his seat belt, flips around, starts choking Greg but not enough where he can’t breathe. He was still able to talk and his voice was nasally / altered.

Greg says he ended up in juvenile hall his adrenaline was pumping so much that he was crying and incoherently saying “I think he hit me” to police. Says his brain was scrambled. They cuffed him and he said they were fancy handcuffs and they said “yeah, they’re new.” He says that was stupid.

Greg says his aunt and uncle adopted a Korean girl and a Korean boy. Brian, his Korean cousin, said Greg’s dad told him Greg hauled him off and punched him.

NWG says in the article, his dad said he placed his hands on Greg’s shoulders. Greg says at least his father admits to initialing physical aggression. NWG says, “well, he’s your parent.” Greg says you can’t be psychically aggressive with your kids. NWG asks where is the line between psychical aggression and psychical comfort? Greg asks if his father was comforting him after he called his wife a fucking bitch? NWG repeats he was trying to put his hand on Greg’s shoulder. Greg says that was satirical.

Greg asked his dad to stop choking him a couple times, then he warns him a couple times that was was going to fight back. He’s still choking him and not saying anything. Greg says there’s a lump on his neck and he doesn’t know if it was from this incident or he didn’t notice it until then. He had the doctor at juvenile hall check it out and they said it was nothing. Greg was wearing combat boots and he stomped him to the dashboard of the car. Stomped him on his neck, chest, and face.

Greg guesses his father was 195 lbs and he was 15 and 130 lbs and they’re the same height. NWG asks if he’s sure he was 15 at the time. Greg says positive because his girlfriend was the same age. NWG says his father said he was 17. Greg laughs about it. Greg says 9/11 happened when he was staying with his dad and does the math to prove he was 15. Says he was at Miamisburg High School in Miamisburg, Ohio. They rolled a TV in the room and showed them the planes hitting the towers. NWG questions Greg’s recollection, suggests he misremembers where he was during 9/11. Greg says he stayed with his father for 6 months. He was there the end of the last school year and in the beginning of the next. NWG questions him again. Greg says when he was 17 he was at Lakes High School in Lakewood, Washington while going to Pierce College. He roller-bladed to college.

NWG guy says according to Greg’s father and step mother, after Juvie, Tammi tried to get custody of him. Greg agrees and says initially it was either Tammi who wanted him out of the house or himself. NWG asks if Greg remembers why he left. Greg says he doesn’t, says his mom would know. He wanted to live with his father and his mom let him. NWG asks if it’s possible Greg was aggressive and punched a dry wall in Tammi’s house. Greg says no, but his mom attacked him with a large flashlight. She smacked him on the leg with it while he was laying in a bed. He pushed her away with his feet while she hit him on the hips. She later on said to Damon, who was his sister’s boyfriend, that Greg hit him. Greg says his mom can't keep her story straight. He defends himself from his parents with his feet. He guesses he was 13 or 14. Says this was at the Bluffs Condominiums in Lakewood, Washington.

NWG asks what Greg’s relationship with Tammi is like. Greg say it’s alright. He didn’t talk to her for 4 months because she mentioned a lawsuit against him. She believes she’s not allowed around certain people she’s related to. He says it’s not true. He doesn’t want her to be alone with them because of her life decisions. She was more responsible when he was a child and now she’s letting her freak flag fly, which she has a right to do. Doesn’t want that to be experienced by people who are younger. He won’t let people drink alcohol around them. A lot of him family members are mad at him about that. He wouldn’t let people hold a baby he was in charge of while they were drinking alcohol. NWG asks when was the last time Tammi saw those people. Greg says last family event. Says his mom is a cool creative person, but they butt heads sometimes.

NWG asks if Greg butts heads with a lot of people. Greg says of course. NWG asks what he means by “of course”. Greg says, “you know who I am.” He butts heads with people all the time on Youtube. NWG asks why. Greg says a classic example is when he made a fake meltdown video with Cyr. People think they’re real so he has to posts the bloopers. NWG asks why he feels the need to make a fake narrative. Greg says because it’s fun. NWG asks if monetization plays into it. Greg says not these days, Youtube demonetizes it all.

NWG asks if that’s why Greg agitated Chris Hansen recently, because views have been down? Greg says allegedly he heard Chris Hansen tried to sell a coronavirus cure. NWG says that sounds like him. NWG asks who are the people that told him. Greg says one if someone that worked with Chris Hansen and the other is someone that follows everything Hasnen does online to tell Greg. There is a third person that does the same thing. Greg says after hearing about the coronavirus cure, he wanted to confront Hansen for being fake. In the past, his spouse told Greg not to talk about anything publicly or he’s leave him. It got to the point where he said if you’re going to leave me, leave me because he had to talk about it. Ever since then he’s been empowered.

NWG asks if Greg would be open to having a relationship with his extended family. Greg says, fuck no.” Says his father is a molester. Says this person is an adult now and still stands by the fact they they were molested. This person is private and isn’t trying to get views. Real victims sit in the shadows and if anything go to the cops or family members. When Greg asked them if they were violated, they changed the subject because they can’t talk about it. Greg says his dad is acting like the victim but can’t get basic facts. Doesn’t even know when Greg was there.

NWG asks if Greg’s sisters would talk to him. Greg says, “no, fuck you dude.” Says they’re private people. They don’t want to talk to a reporter about their molester dad. NWG says, “fair.” Greg says it’s amazing NWG would talk to a literal molester, child rapist and act like he’s right and then harass their family. NWG asks, “harassed?” Greg says something about his mom, but I can’t really make it out. NWG says he send a Facebook post.

Greg repeats himself, then says NWG is a scumbag for talking about people who were violated as children, making money off it, then asking to talk to them. Greg asks what they would have to gain for re-living what their dad put them through? Greg repeats himself, more aggressively this time while NWG says “yeah, yeah” “ok”.

Greg says NWG should have gone to the police instead of contacting his family members. He should have went to the police and told them to get in contact with them. NWG says that’s now how it works. Greg keeps going.

NWG asks if he’s going to keep yelling, because he could stop this. Greg says, “it’s already done bro.” Greg says he’s already said what he needed to about NWG preying on child victims and making coin off of them. NWG says, “the irony is palpable good sir.” Greg asks how. NWG says no. Greg mocks him for not backing up his words. He asks again what he meant by that. NWG says nothing.

Greg asks is there’s anything else. NWG says that’s everything he wanted to cover. Greg asks if they really covered everything? He’s sure there’s more. NWG says Greg is really enjoying this. Greg says he is. He likes seeing a scumbag get his ass handed to him. NWG says he’s not the first interviewee to say that. Greg says then maybe he should find a better job instead of making molestation victims relive their trauma for money. NWG says, “that’s quite the narrative.” Greg points out NWG asked in the interview if his sisters wanted to talk. NWG asks if they’re done. Greg says he didn’t even finish the story about beating the shit out of his pedophile father. Greg asks if he wants to finish. NWG says “no, not really.” They say bye. NWG leaves and Greg ends it by saying, “that’s Newsweek everyone.”

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koganphrancis · 4 years

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Ernie & Bert Are Planning A Wedding

OR: My thoughts on Episode 11

Everything just hurts. Let me start with the “previously on” segment. Yeah, we finally get an Ian/Mickey intro, but it’s just like so many of the other intros-random characters outside yelling at viewers. Since there’s been little to none intimacy for this couple this season we couldn’t have caught them in bed? Or in mid-kiss? Nope. Ian can be drinking yet another beer tho. Pretty sure those meds we saw when Sandy grabbed Mickey’s dick all those episodes ago now was Mickey’s gerd medication. Ian’s clearly not being written as taking medication at all (yet again).

But as usual, I digress. The show starts with a somewhat cute reminder of how the Gallavich house is within running distance of the (now torn down in real life, RIP) Milkovich house. Unfortunately it’s Terry who reminds us. Ian’s watching Terry screaming up at the house while Mickey’s...off doing something without Ian. Seriously, whatever the opposite of “joined at the hip” is, that’s what these epic soulmates are this season :(

Anyway, Mickey walks downstairs and Ian unhelpfully informs him, “Your dad’s here.” Mickey says yeah and goes out to see Terry. Ian gives one more peek thru the curtain but must decide that Mickey’s in no danger, since next we see him, Ian’s sitting in the kitchen casually chatting with Lip about something that’ll never happen (Lip moving to Wisconsin).

Outside, Mickey and Terry draw guns on each other while Terry’s just now (?) trying to figure out where Mickey went “wrong” and turned out gay. Um, I know Terry’s been busy with prison and running his illegal enterprises (whatever they might be), but he’s just now trying to catch up on what he learned literally years ago when he walked in on Ian and Mickey having sex?

(Gif credit: jackorowan)

The scene at least gives us an iconic Mickey line, “I definitely love one,” but is it too little too late? It’s enough to send Terry on his way for now, after one last threat. Mickey calmly goes back inside, says “mornin’” to Ian and Lip, and starts to make himself a bowl of cereal. I list all that out to stress how non-stressed he seems. Ian says, “So, how’s your dad?”, and just like the, “Hi, Mr. Milkovich” and “Was Mickey adopted?” conversation Ian had with Terry in S9, so far everything is being written to show how this is just normal family life when it comes to Terry. But by the next scene the show will want us to buy that something entirely different is going on and I just don’t understand why they can’t find a narrative and stick to it. In the days since the episode aired, I’ve read so many head canon posts about how understandable it was for Mickey to flip out after seeing Terry, and how that brought all Mickey’s past trauma to the surface and of course it turned him into a groomzilla, but I just can’t agree that that’s what the show either set out to do or accomplished. Mickey’s been working for Terry, he’s been around him-it’s one of the few things about Mickey’s life the show has shown us since he’s been out of prison. Everyone in Terry’s world that they’ve shown is perfectly comfortable talking about the fact that yes, some people are in fact gay. Terry’s peers in prison, Terry’s own relatives-why suddenly in Episode 11 is this “a thing”?

Anyway, the scene continues after Mickey quips that he doesn’t think Terry will be his best man. Liam joins the scene and there’s very cute, well executed banter where Ian, Lip, and Mickey tell him they can each forge Frank’s signature. It’s a tantalizing glimpse of what the season could’ve been if these guys were allowed to all be in scenes together.

Mainly thanks to Myles’ AV Club review, I know that for whatever reason, the show decided to do a one month time jump between the engagement episode and this one. WTF? It doesn’t even make sense-it means somewhere that woman holding Frank captive was feeding him and clothing and bathing him? That Liam hasn’t been to school in a month because Frank hasn’t been around to sign him in? As if that wouldn’t have had CPS showing up at the Gallagher house (that has to be red flagged in the system by now)? Debbie being toyed with by that mother and daughter has been going on for weeks at this point? The only thing the time jump did that I care about was rob us of seeing Mickey and Ian telling people they were engaged. We deserved a little scene of Ian and Lip talking about it at least-give Lip the opportunity to ask Ian what changed his mind about marriage and give the audience the opportunity to hear some sort of explanation. “I heard some guy I know Mickey didn’t care about putting him down and I just knew then and there I had to marry him,” doesn’t quite cut it.

But so much for what should have been. In the next scene, Mickey slaps down a pile of wedding magazines and drops the news on Ian (as he hands him a beer) that they’re going to have a “wedding wedding”. Mickey needs a headcount for the reception venue-clearly money is no problem, so working for Terry all those intervening weeks must’ve been lucrative.

In a rare instance of the show actually cluing us in on someone’s thought process, Mickey says flat out that he now wants a “real” wedding because his fuckhead dad threatened to murder him-again-cuz he’s gay. So, see? AGAIN. What’s different this time? It’s like the show NEEDS there to be a reason, a mitigating circumstance, for two men to want to get married. They can’t just let Mickey and Ian have the natural progression of their relationship leading to a lifetime together. It’s so offensive. And again, for viewers that have been invested in this relationship for so long, it just hurts. Mickey’s doing this as a big FU to his father rather than as a big ILY to Ian. That’s OOC for sure-Mickey’s always put loving Ian first in his life.

In planning the wedding, Noel does get some great moments. Talking about the “little shits that light the candles”, and his choice of wedding song, and confronting the homophobic old bitch at the florist. And the literal scenery chewing he does at the wedding chairs rental place was, I’m sure, quite fun for Noel as an actor. BUT-the only moment we get where Ian seems on board/with Mickey in any of it is at the florist before the bitch sets Mickey off. Otherwise Ian’s like a casual bystander in all this-and that’s just not in character either. Why can’t they both be into making these decisions? Why, even if Ian truly couldn’t give a shit about seeing Mickey happy about these little details-why can’t they at least be affectionate with each other? I don’t expect Schitt’s Creek level adoring looks, but I do expect Gallavich level. Ian used to look at Mickey with awe even when Mickey was being his Mickey-est. Why aren’t they allowed to show that anymore?

I will say, I did love the stargazer lily thing-altho it’s all the more frustrating to realize this week’s writer must’ve watched at least the fan compilation video of Gallavich to know that detail was a very sweet throw back-why couldn’t they also write some kisses and hand holding in too? But anyway, “Beyond Blue” and Mickey looking touched when Ian said he liked the blue ones-we needed a lot more moments like that this season. Why everything’s getting crammed into these final, rushed episodes is beyond me.

Now I have to bitch again about what was wrong with the florist scene. Yes, I’m sure there are plenty of people like that woman in the world. But there are also plenty who don’t oppose same sex marriage. Why is it always such a big deal on Shameless? Either everything’s gay or nothing is. They’ve given us an entire squad of fire fighters who are gay. Debbie clearly can’t walk five feet in any direction since the show decided she was gay without her finding a woman DTF her. Ian had-what was the ridiculous number?-7 million Instagram followers when he was Gay Jesus. So ONE homophobic old lady in a flower shop means disaster? Ian knows how to look shit up on his phone, he proved that looking for wedding statistics. You mean to tell me he doesn’t know how to check Yelp reviews to somehow find a gay-friendly florist in a city the size of Chicago?

Mickey did get a couple of funny lines in that scene (killed me when he called her Grandma), but, again the show is throwing too much in the blender. Is the scene supposed to be that funny? If Mickey is dealing with past trauma, this is just adding to it. And Ian, who is supposed to know Mickey better than anyone (including the viewer) isn’t acting worried about him, he’s acting like he’s being dragged all these places against his will. So where’s the comedy in that?

Next there’s a scene of Mickey walking down the sidewalk and glorious natural light, looking like he’s glowing. It immediately gets ruined by Ian stopping in front of a store window full of bride mannequins and looking at them and then after Mickey, with the visual implication strongly suggesting that Mickey’s the “woman” in their relationship which is so outdated in 2020 that the show and the network should have to pay a fine.

Then we get the chairs meltdown, which gives us the truest line, “Why does everything always have to SUCK?” You’re singing our song, Mickey. Then the show proves that point for the millionth time by having Mickey call the chairs guy the R word-twice.

In the next scene, Mickey’s called in the always reliable important character of Mand..um, Sandy because Ian’s of no use to him. WTF? Mickey is still talking up grandiose wedding plans and Ian’s still trying to figure it all out. He tries to ask, “This is still about Terry, right? You don’t give a shit about weddings...” Mickey interrupts him to ask where his ring is. Ian has to stop and think and realizes he must’ve left it on the sink. He runs off before Mickey can tear him a new one. Mickey throws his pen down and says to Sandy, “I can’t even.” Sandy replies, “I can see why you called,” but on Twitter fans have pointed out her lips appear to be saying, “Is he even into this at all?” WHICH IS ANOTHER THING. After all Ian’s marriage issues, why is Mickey bulldozing ahead and not noticing what Ian seems to be feeling AT ALL. (Which appears to be that he’s once again regretting this whole marriage thing.) Why does the show make the two of them so blind to each other’s feelings now? WHY? Now that Lip’s living in the RV, do they even share a room anymore? They act like they never, ever talk now. There is such a disconnect hanging over the short time they are shown together in every episode. Not to mention they’ve been desexualized to the point of being a couple of Ken dolls. John Wells must be so thrilled he doesn’t have to sit thru dailies of them physically touching anymore. I’m willing to believe he hired someone to Jeff Giloolly Cam’s leg so he could have Mickey and Ian get engaged and married without any love scenes at this point.

In the last scene, Ian and Mickey are at The Alibi and Ian’s (having a beer) making one last attempt to simplify the wedding. After another “it depends who’s the bride and who’s the groom” eye-rolling moment, Ian asks, “Can’t we just be Ian and Mickey?” I guess not, when it comes to this show. In the past Ian would’ve loved Mickey’s tension away for him-letting Mickey find his release in multiple orgasms, not in wedding planning. Now all he can do is hire some guy with a guitar to show up at the bar and sing Mickey’s wedding song-and “sing” is a very generous term here. Props to the show for not having an amazing singer just show up out of the blue, but, for the love of my bleeding ears, couldn’t they have found less of a screecher?

Mickey is, at first, freaked out by this guitar playing weirdo coming near his booth, but when he recognizes the song he asks, “How the fuck did you know that?” The guitarist replies, “Little bird told me” indicating Ian, and then unfortunately goes back to the song and soon finds himself way out of his range. Mickey gives Ian a soft look, Ian gives Mickey one of the smiles he only ever has for Mickey, and Silver Tree becomes JW’s favorite director ever by not even letting us see them holding each other’s hands-that’s below the camera line. For all we can prove, maybe Ian and Mickey were just reaching for the salt shaker at the same time. Personally, I would’ve ended the episode with Ian and Mickey metaphorically and literally getting on the same page-they go back to the house, their double bed is covered in Mickey’s wedding magazines and color swatches and seating charts and whatever other wedding prep detritus. Ian, seeing it all laid out like that says softly, “Are you really doing all this for Terry?” and Mickey says, “Course not, it’s all for us. We deserve it.” Then they flop down on the bed together and get to kissing, right on top of it all.

But no, can’t have them intimate or even on the same side of a booth. So, you’d think that happy-ish ending we did get means Mickey’s out of his Terry-induced panic, but scenes and stills for the season finale will disabuse you of that hope.

My final thought is: I’m wondering how much, if any, of these wedding details we’ll see. The show is too cheap now to spend money on a church wedding with those gorgeous stargazer lilies and the little shits that light the candles. Plus why would you have Living On A Prayer sung again when you used it in this episode? Will one of them-or both of them-walk down an aisle? They’ve already got their rings and have been wearing them-I don’t see them wearing multiple rings each. If the show had any guts at all, it’d have them exchange cock rings at the ceremony ;P Will we even get to see the wedding part or will they go straight to some sort of brawl/reception? And, sadly, I’ve felt from the first time I saw pictures of them driving off in the Mercedes that we’re not going to see them get to consummate the marriage. I hope I’m wrong about all of it, but I won’t be surprised to be let down utterly-either by what they don’t or what they do show :( See ya on the other side!

#IanandMickey #Season 10 Episode 11 #Recap #It's a heartache nothing but a heartache

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blackjack-15 · 4 years

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Whale Be Clamming for Clues — Thoughts on: Danger on Deception Island (DDI)

Previous Metas: SCK/SCK2, STFD, MHM, TRT, FIN, SSH, DOG, CAR

Hello and welcome to a Nancy Drew meta series! 30 metas, 30 Nancy Drew Games that I’m comfortable with doing meta about. Hot takes, cold takes, and just Takes will abound, but one thing’s for sure: they’ll all be longer than I mean them to be.

Each meta will have different distinct sections: an Introduction, an exploration of the Title, an explanation of the Mystery, a run-through of the Suspects. Then, I’ll tackle some of my favorite and least favorite things about the game, and finish it off with ideas on how to improve it.

If any game requires an extra section or two, they’ll be listed in the paragraph above, along with links to previous metas.

These metas are not spoiler free, though I’ll list any games/media that they might spoil here: DDI.

The Intro:

First off, let me apologize for the title of this meta. Much like Bess, I couldn’t resist the pun.

Second off, let me just say that DDI is a game that deserves its status as an Iconic Nancy Drew game. If you don’t have access to MHM, TRT, or SSH, DDI is probably the next best place to start the series (while CAR is a great game and should definitely be played, it’s less good as an introduction to the series).

DDI’s got Bess and George, the Hardy Boys, quirky phone characters, incredible atmosphere, fun puzzles, a few suspects, and herrings (red or otherwise) galore. DDI looked at every Nancy Drew game at that point and decided to play the formula straight while doing it nigh-perfectly, and it’s a joy to play.

Its soundtrack should also be of special note; it’s immediately identifiable as being from the Pacific Northwest (the land where HER hails from) and it helps build the incredible atmosphere while still feeling a bit friendly and welcoming as only sea shanty-inspired music can. Special props should go to the music that plays when Nancy encounters Hilda for being particularly touching.

The only real place that DDI falls off a bit is with a couple of its characters — most specifically Katie and Andy. Sure, those are the two you’re supposed to suspect the most, and so they’re a little less fleshed out so HER didn’t give anything away, but there’s not really much to like about either one of them. Holt and Jenna are less divisive and can be a breath of fresh air when the player has dealt too long with the Twin Whale Watching Terrors, but there’s not too much to like there either other than being better than the other two.

It’s one thing to have a cast that is made up of suspicious or even brusque suspects, but it’s quite another to have a cast made up of mostly unpleasant people who hate the others. Normally there’s at least one character that Nancy can touch base with, but outside of her phone contacts, there’s no safe haven in Snake Horse Harbor.

There is one person who does make the game friendly, mysterious, and a little bit wistful, but we’ll talk about her more in the Suspect section.

Ultimately, Danger on Deception Island is really a game to more be experienced than it is to be spoken about (Hilda notwithstanding, who is excellent to talk about) as its simplicity and logic is undermined by the lack of need to explain it. For a game with superlative atmosphere, beautiful music, appropriate and good puzzles, and possibly the best one-off phone contact of all time, DDI is an appropriate, if not flawless, ninth entry into the Nancy Drew games series and a game that demands to be played on those misty, foggy, slightly mysterious days.

The Title:

Let’s be real here, “Danger on Deception Island” is a fantastic title. It’s moody, sounds exciting, definitely establishes a sense of mystery, gives us our location, and is vague enough to be enticing to the imagination while not so vague as to frustrate the player.

It’s also pretty literal; there is danger, and the island is called Deception Island (though, knowing that’s a bit of a hokey name, they do refer to Nancy’s location mostly as “Snake Horse Harbor”, after the Nessie knock-off that’s said to haunt the waters near the harbor). It’s kind of a classic pulp-type title for a mystery, and it fits the sense of heavy atmosphere and nasty suspects that DDI features.

It’s effective enough that there’s not much more to say here, so let’s move on to the reason behind the Danger on Deception island.

The Mystery:

While Nancy’s called out to go on a whale watching tour with Katie, a friend of George’s (though how she and George are friends, we have no idea), she encounters a case of sabotage almost immediately, and gets to work ferreting out justice — though she does get a tour with Andy, Katie’s rival.

Nancy is then set to explore Snake Horse Harbor on bike (helmet on, please, as they somehow magically deter crashes) and meet the locals, dig for clams, discover the difference between male and female crabs (the difference being about 150$ and a jail sentence), explore an old lighthouse, talk with a librarian about hard wood, and enjoy a great soundtrack perfectly encapsulating the Pacific Northwest.

The Suspects:

Katie Firestone is George’s friend and the first person Nancy meets upon her arrival to Deception Island. She’s also the victim of some sabotage and threatening notes, as Nancy discovers when she arrives, per her unpopular stance to take the orphaned orca and bring it to an aquarium where it can be cured of the illness that Katie theorizes that it has and can be studied further.

Per her job as a marine biologist, Katie is the only one with a permit that allows her to get up close and personal with the orphaned orca for whale watching tours, which makes her (very understandably) unpopular among the residents of Snake Horse Harbor. She’s also not the friendliest of people, which leads her to be even more unpopular.

As a suspect, Katie is sort of a mixed bag. The game plays her up just enough to keep her a suspect without playing her up so much that it’s obvious that she’s not. She never acts as Nancy’s “detective buddy”, but isn’t opposed to helping her – or keeping her busy. All in all, Katie has both the makings of the obvious victim and possibly as a clever suspect using their unpopularity to throw people off the scent.

DDI also throws in the fun little twist of pretending to reveal Katie as the villain before Nancy spins the chair around to reveal that she’s been tied up and duct taped by the real villain. It’s a pretty good “gotcha” moment and definitely fooled me the first time I played it (though I was quite young at the time, it should be noted).

Jenna Deblin is the owner of the Hot Kettle Café where economics don’t matter and Nancy can eat as many bowls of clam chowder as she wants for free. Friendly, chatty, and a bit of a gossip, Jenna fills Nancy in on the happenings in town — and on how much she dislikes Katie. A staunch conservationist, Jenna believes that the orca should be returned to its pod as soon as possible, and heavily disagrees with Katie’s aquarium plan.

She’s the kindest out of all of Nancy’s suspects and is cleared the earliest when her Café gets robbed and she and Nancy discover the tunnels under the Café used for shanghaiing sailors in the past. Jenna also would bring Hilda groceries when everyone else avoided or distrusted her, putting her firmly in the “good” category of suspects.

As a suspect, Jenna’s made to be the one that Nancy (and the player) can feel the most on the level with. Even with the underground tunnels, there’s really nothing frightening about either Jenna or the Hot Kettle Café, and the puzzles and information that they supply are fun and a little whimsical. The only thing suspicious about Jenna at all is her hatred of Katie, but having dealt with Katie for a good portion of the game, the player really shouldn’t consider that unusual or grounds for sabotage.

As a side note, Jenna is the first Native American character in the HER interactive series, a fact not hidden in the game, but also outright confirmed by HER themselves. While she’ll be joined in this later by SHA’s Mary and TOT’s Debbie, it’s a good thing to, in a setting so defined by its Native population, include a character of Native origin.

Holt Scotto is the rough ‘n’ gruff mayoral candidate for the next election in Snake Horse Harbor and owner of a pointlessly suspicious bag. As a veteran fisherman, he hates that the orca is disrupting the economy (as fishing is ubiquitously the number one vocation on islands like Deception Island) and making it more difficult for fishers to work.

While he seems to be friendly with Jenna (and at least on good terms with Hilda), Holt doesn’t much care for tourists like Nancy and makes her work for each and every bit of information that he has. Holt is the second most friendly person on the island (once again, discounting phone characters) in that he really doesn’t care what Nancy does so long as she doesn’t disturb Deception Island’s ecosystem and fills out the little survey he gives her.

Holt is a caricature in nearly every way that HER could make a caricature, but he’s still enjoyable and gives a few fun puzzles. He’s mostly there to round out the cast, but his voice acting is decent and his visual character design is absolutely spot on.

Andy Jason (whose voice is none other than now-regular HER voice actor and my personal hero Jonah Von Spreecken) is the friendly neighborhood rival whale-watching guide, but without Katie’s cozy little permit that lets her exploit the whale for money under the guise of Academia. While kind of friendly, he’s pretty ruthless in his business dealings, and owns the world’s worst plaid shirt.

As DDI’s resident villain, Andy makes the best suspect. He fails at being friendly or charming, but is barely a blip on Nancy’s radar through the first half of the game…apart from one horrible misstep on the part of HER, where his business card is found on Katie’s boat.

Because he and Katie are rivals (and because Katie’s generally hated), there’s no reason for his card to be on his boat, and it’s obvious that he’s the one who sabotaged Katie’s boat. Since Nancy Drew generally doesn’t have two main villains, the person who sabotaged her boat must be the villain, and thus Andy must be the villain.

There’s a nice little moment where Nancy sees Katie sitting in a chair, her back to Nancy, down in the Big Bad’s lair, that implies that Katie’s the one behind it. Of course, when the chair spins around, Katie’s duct taped and captive in the chair. That moment of doubt is effective, but it’s a good thing that HER resolves it within seconds, because it wouldn’t hold up any longer than that.

Andy is a little bit threatening in his last attempt to prevent Nancy from exposing him to the world — though the way Nancy takes him down is hilariously roundabout; one would think an air tank to the head via Nancy would be more effective than an air tank to the head via orca would be — but as a slightly weak character, his ending is a bit more of the same.

Hilda Swenson, like Miles in CAR, isn’t really a suspect, but does have to be included here for her sheer impact on (and subsequent elevation of) the game. An ex-movie director turned ex-mayor, Hilda’s a bit of an eccentric who lost her husband a few years ago and moved off the island, but still influences both the island and the events of the game.

Deciding that things are Not Going Well and that suspicious Things Are Happening, Hilda sets up a seek-and-find for someone smart, resourceful, tenacious, and curious — aka, Nancy — to find and contact her so that they can save the island together.

Hilda is definitely a little odd (though not really by Nancy Drew character standards), but what makes her really magical is that she really doesn’t care what others think of her and lives the way she thinks is best, cackling along as she sprinkles her good deeds along the shore.

She’s an oddity among Nancy Drew characters in that her presence is so strong without ever seeing any bit of her. She’s not out for or against Nancy, she’s just out to make sure her Harbor is saved, and her world goes on before and after Nancy. She really makes Snake Horse Harbor feel like it’s not just there for Nancy to solve a mystery in it, and that feeling is part of what makes DDI remarkable.

The Favorite:

Even with the Hardy Boys present and attentive, the best character of this game is Hilda, no contest. I’ve said all I can about her, so we’ll move on…mostly.

Embarrassingly after that paragraph, my favorite moment of the game is a Hilda moment — or rather, a moment right after a Hilda moment. Hilda sends Nancy out on a kayak for her clues, speaking to her for the last time. She hangs up after wishing Nancy good luck, and for just a few beats, the moment hangs in the air. It’s misty out in the ocean and Nancy’s alone, holding the weight of saving the harbor and exposing wrongs and ensuring the right thing happens for the orphaned orca

My favorite puzzle is prolly collecting all of the things Hilda left behind and assembling them. It’s a fun little series of fetch quests, culminating in a great moment out on the water, and they’re just really enjoyable as they help build the world.

The Un-Favorite:

I’ve discussed Katie and Andy earlier, but they definitely deserve a place in this section, as their presence does drag down the game just a bit from where it could have been.

My least favorite moment in the game is probably the part where Holt catches Nancy outside the lighthouse, purely because it makes me jump every time. DDI really doesn’t have any sour note moments, so this qualifies because I give a little shrill scream whenever it happens.

My least favorite puzzle is definitely the male vs female crab dilemma. These metas have talked before about my visual processing not being the greatest, so that’s probably the reason, but even when I have a picture of both of them side-by-side, I always end up guessing wrong and getting Thrown in the Brig. It is a mark of how well-integrated the puzzles are that none of them feel really clunky or like a pain.

The Fix:

So how would I fix Danger on Deception Island?

I’d really only do it by refurbing Katie and Andy a bit so that they’re not so……well, blatantly horrible and flat people. There’s always room in detective stories for nasty characters, but not ones so flat as those two. Give them relationships with everyone in Snake Horse Harbor — Andy especially, since he’s been there longer than Katie — and you’d be well on your way towards fixing the problem.

Maybe Holt knew Andy’s dad, who was an old friend of his who disagreed on everything with him but they were drinking buddies, so he watches out for Andy. Meanwhile, Jenna doesn’t much care for Andy, but they both hate Katie, so they band together out of pure spite and teeth-clenched teamwork. But, in a twist, Andy does have a bit of sympathy for Katie as a newcomer because years ago his dad had an apprentice of sorts who came to the island but was bullied into leaving.

Maybe Katie, meanwhile, disagrees heavily with Jenna but is so addicted to her chowder that she goes when Jenna has someone else (her Aunt Iris, perhaps?) covering the shop, only to develop a crush on the temp, so she subtly sabotages Jenna so that she has to leave the Café more and more often, which makes Jenna angrier. Let’s say Holt doesn’t mind Katie being a newcomer, but hates the temp Jenna gets to cover the Café, and knows Katie’s behind it but can’t prove it. Maybe even make it so Katie does feel guilty about using her permit to make money off the orca…but not guilty enough to stop doing it.

Just those simple tweaks going on in the background, referenced a few times, give the characters even more of a sense of existing out of just the game and helps balance them out against characters like Hilda who are more developed with severely less screen time.

Relationships are the quickest way to build characters, and while DDI has an incredible amount of atmosphere, fleshing out its two most suspicious characters would go a long way to perfecting this already awesome game.

#nancy drew #clue crew #nancy drew games #danger on deception island #nancy drew meta #DDI #video games #my meta

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elliebartlets · 5 years

Text

TWW Rewatch: Red Haven’s on Fire (4.17)

• everyone else: watching the new stranger things season

me: continuing with my rewatch of a political show that ended 15+ years ago

• and I’m ok with that

• my god this entire cold opening

“If I was someone who felt comfortable hugging other people” lol Toby

——

“Sign here, here, here, here, here-

*Toby gives him that look*

-here, here. Initial it here, here, here here and sign again here.”

——

“He came for me and I took care of business.”

“You did what?”

“Charlie took care of business.”

——

“You know you sit in a cage you have time to do a lot of thinking.”

“We were in the joint for two hours and 20 minutes.”

——

“You trapped people at Disneyland, told the French to stick a loaf of bread up their ass, had a meeting with a communist, but things are looking up cause my new campaign director just made bail.”

——

“How’d you call Josh? Didn’t they take your cell phone from you?”

“I borrowed theirs.” *nods towards prostitutes*

“So on a call girl’s phone bill there’s gonna be a call to Air Force one?

“You’re really gonna be teaching the seminar on call girl caution? Really?”

• yay Abbey’s in this ep

• “You took a meeting with a communist, Donna.”

“Because you sent me there!”

“Yeah. Fair enough. My bad.”

• I didn’t even see Mary Louise Parker’s name in the first credits so seeing Amy was a bit jarring.

• oh Josh you messed with the first lady’s budget? Oh honey no, she’s gonna kick ur ass

• lol Abbey standing in Josh’s doorway, waiting for the kill

• “I haven’t mentioned this in a while ma’am, but I think you and the president are a perfect couple.”

Oh same

• Max is her nephew? Isn’t that like nepotism?

• oh that was super awkwardddd. Josh was lowkey highkey being an asshole, and nothist to a tall random stafff member, but to the First Lady! And all she wanted was money for child immunization.

• oh wait and then she goes and hires Amy as her cheif of staff! HA

• I mean ugh cause Amy but HA cause she literally took Josh’s advice and got a real professional CoS.

• oh hi CJ, nice of you to join us

• this meeting with the family members is awkward and sad. I can’t even remember if they get the soldiers back

• aw poor Will. He has so much to deal with, butIE

• he just broke the fucking glass again aksksks 😂😂

• oh nooo this is when Amy sets the tablecloth on fire!! 😂💀

• I have such secondhand embarrassment for her right now it’s taking me like 5 minutes to get through this scene.

• Like pour water over it!

• ok well at least she tried

• I may not like Amy but damn do I relate to her awkwardness in social situations

• “I’ve still got sand in my shoes.”

“🎶 sand in my shoooes 🎶”

TWACK TWACK TWACK TWACK

“🎶 sand from havannaaaa 🎶”

Lmaooo

• “You want me to tell Mrs. Bartlet?

lol Charlie’s always scared to tell Abbey no

“I once had to tell the President he was wearing two different shoes.”

“That’s roughly the same.”

• oh ok they got them out yay

• oh no what’s with the ominous music?!

• oh red haven’s on fire, hence the title.

• I love how Debbie’s still playing with the three year old, like wouldn’t she have other work to do?

• aw Toby and Sam hugged :’)

• ok I feel like this is the last time we see Rob Lowe. It just feels set up that way.

#tww #the west wing #red haven’s on fire #jed bartlet #leo mcgarry #cj cregg #josh lyman #toby ziegler #donna moss #charlie young #the west wing rewatch #tww rewatch

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itsyourchoicedevotionals · 2 years

Photo

But Wait

“…Why, what evil has He done?” But they kept shouting all the more, saying, “Crucify Him!” Matthew 27:23NASB

Government is one subject most of my church acquaintances considers awful and nearing unbearable. Thieves, connivers, traffickers, satanists, drug promoters and liars; Bent on destroying our nation; Communists determined to rob those who’ve earned, to give to those who are too lazy to work; Anti-God; Elections riggers; Needing term limits Senators and Congresspersons; Cheaters with a fake President. Everyone agrees on one thing— Jesus is our only hope.

After Cyrus freed the Israelite slaves, returning them from exile in Babylon— they didn’t remain a sovereign nation very long. Israel could easily have been named: ‘the nation always conquered.’ Their enslavements came because of their constant rejection of Jehovah God.

Rome was their latest conquer. Their troops rode through the streets dominating the citizens daily. Yet, the Pharisees lived in denial— “They answered Him, “We are Abraham’s descendants and have never yet been enslaved to anyone…” John 8:33NASB. Really?

Beyond denial, they were hypocrites. Without exercising love, as the ten commandments instructed, they sought to murder the innocent man—Jesus. Their reason? Jealousy. Jesus drew the crowds. “it was early; and they themselves did not enter into the Praetorium so that they would not be defiled, but might eat the Passover. Therefore Pilate went out to them and *said, “What accusation do you bring against this Man?” John 18:28-29NASB. The government they hated, denied being enslaved to, became their tool for murder.

Instigating the crowd was easy. The week before these people had hailed Jesus as their King, crying out “Hosanna,” which literally means, ‘Lord SAVE us.’ Expectations had run high then. This Jesus would ‘save’ them from Rome’s control— that they weren’t enslaved to. Their desire didn’t happen. Now they cried out “Crucify Him!”

Expectations for Jesus to ‘save’ them were right on target. Not ‘saved’ from a government but salvation from sin, sickness, poverty, lack of peace, and unsoundness, which are all matters of the soul.

Are we that much different today than the Israelites were? We want Jesus to come rescue us from our current government, chaos, wars, trafficking and crime. Much of this, we’ve created ourselves— voted these crooks into office or worse, didn’t even vote. Nor did we stand up in a loving manner for what’s right in the face of ‘political correctness.’

Perhaps Jesus didn’t heal mother, father, wife, husband, sister, brother, son or daughter. We scream out from our growing unbelief with the crowd, “Crucify Him!” Jesus didn’t bring back that wayward spouse, child or sibling from drugs, alcohol or adultery. Unbelief wells up in our heart because He’s not ‘saved’ us, as we prescribed. Yelling with the crowd, we cry out, “Crucify Him! You may have even lost everything financially. Wrong choices, bad business deals, bum economy caused years of hard work to disappear in a heartbeat. Your voice is raised with the crowd, He didn’t ‘save’ me. “Crucify Him!”

BUT WAIT —His crucifixion was to bury sin, —its hopelessness, discouragement, and disbelief with His dead body. This is Friday and Sunday is coming. Not even a corrupt government could or can stop what’s coming. Wait until you see Him resurrected from the grave. Wait until you see, Jesus —now reigning King forever. Our sins have remained buried. Wait, Sunday’s coming. Will you believe? It’s your choice. You choose.

LET’S PRAY: Father I thank You that Your plan wasn’t just to help one generation of Your Israelite people. Your plans were for salvation to come for everyone who will believe in any generation. Help us to reach those who don’t believe. Help the unbelieving, please Sir, to change their minds, in the name of Jesus Christ I pray.

#Jesus Christ #lord of lords #Word of God #Holy Spirit #God #it's your choice #devotional #wait #hypocrite #unbelief #unbearable #resurrected #King #hope #love #faith

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scrapyardboyfriends · 7 years

Text

15 September 2017

[The Mill with Aaron and Liv]

AARON: One piece of charcoal or two? Wow I can’t even make toast without Robert here! But I’m fine, don’t worry.

LIV: Rob would have a fit if he were here. That’s right. I’m just going to keep mentioning Robert until you fill me in so I can be fully Plot Aware.

AARON: Shows how much you know. Yes I see the irony in that. But Vic said this place was a disaster while Rob was living here while I was in Dublin. Yep, look at that, I called him Rob and I wasn’t even half dead in the hospital. By the way, Liv, you’re not hanging around in my #Mess all day today. The Plot is hoping the audience forgot that you were expelled before you went on your Plot Hiatus, so I’m taking you back to school.

LIV: Great! So you’re not going to send me back to Dublin then?

AARON: Course not. The Plot clearly wants you here.

LIV: So...back to Robert. Are you going to tell me why you two broke up yet? Cause I’m going to keep asking until you do or go find out from someone else. I just don’t it. You two were still disgustingly in love even though you were in prison when I left. What happened?

AARON: *Please don’t ask it’s too painful Face*

LIV: It’s okay Aaron. Let me tell you how much I miss him too and that he’s like my other brother. I know it will please the fans. They love our relationship and don’t want it to get destroyed. Just, tell me.

AARON: Well...the Plot happened. We like to call it the Hell Plot. It’s bad Liv. Robert’s going to be a dad. Now let me explain the biology of that to you in case you can’t work that out for yourself because well this isn’t mpreg fanfic, thank god...though maybe that would have worked in my favor?! Hmm. Anyway, you see, he had sex with woman and now he...I mean she’s going to have his baby.

LIV: With who?

AARON: My nemesis, Rebecca. You know...the one who I was super paranoid about before. Yep, her. The Plot clearly hates me and wants me to suffer. Robert says it’s because I cry too well.

LIV: Seriously? That’s ridiculous! I can’t believe the Plot would do that to you!

AARON: I know. It really sucks. Now I’m just all #IHateThisFuckingPlot all the time. But, more on that later, for now, time for school.

LIV: *My brother is sad so I am sad but I need to find a way to fix this Face* #OperationGetRobronBackTogether

[Outside The Shop with Aaron, Liv, Robert and Rebecca]

AARON: Hey your teacher forgot the Plot got you expelled too!

LIV: Yep and now I’ve got a ton of work to do. It’s really going to cut into my #OperationGetRobronBackTogether time.

AARON: *Sees Robert and Rebecca* *Internal Sigh* Come on Liv, let’s avoid this confrontation and go home and distract ourselves with video games.

ROBERT: Liv! I’ve missed you so much! I still care about you! I won’t let the Plot ruin our relationship too!

LIV: Get lost! I know the fans love our relationship but I’m not sure it can withstand this...her. *Casually Sexist Alert*

ROBERT: Wait...you’re Plot Aware? *Internal Panic Face*

LIV: Of course I know! Look at that nice new bump she’s got. I heard it took a while to get that in. You know, I always wondered why the Plot had you be so nice to me before I left for my Hiatus. Now I know. #SpeakingForTheFandom

REBECCA: Liv it wasn’t like that...okay...that’s a lie. It was totally like that. The Plot needed me to look like the nicest, kindest friend so that it would be more believable that I was the victim in all of this.

LIV: *Sees through the bullshit Face* Yeah alright. #SpeakingForTheFandom

AARON: Liv, let’s just leave it alright. I can’t handle confrontation. I just want to go home to the virtual reality.

LIV: Sorry Aaron, I’m totally not done yet. I bet you thought it was Christmas when Aaron went to prison. The Plot was just setting you up to get into his pants. #SpeakingForTheFandom

ROBERT: Liv that’s enough! The fans can only take so much of your awesomeness at a time. #YouAreDoingGreat

LIV: Oh but I have sooo much more. Let me just insinuate that you planned this from the beginning because who gets pregnant when they don’t want to. Has no one in this whole village heard of contraception? Why am I, a fifteen year old, lecturing you on this? #SpeakingForTheFandom

AARON: LIv, I think you’ve lectured enough now. Let’s go.

LIV: Nope, I’ve still got more. Robert! Your turn! You only had to wait a couple of months for him and you couldn’t even do that! What kind of Plot is this? Aaron needed you and he loved you! #SpeakingForTheFandom

ROBERT: I’m not going to make any excuses. I’ve owned up to the mistakes the Plot forced on me.

LIV: Well Aaron deserved better than this Plot, we both did! #SpeakingForTheFandom

ROBERT: #SpeakingForMeToo I agree with you completely.

*Robert and Rebecca duck out of the line of fire*

LIV: God, how can you stand this Plot?! #SpeakingForTheFandom

AARON: Because I had to accept a long time ago that it is what it is. We’re stuck in this seemingly never ending Pregnancy Plot now and Robert has to live with that now. So whatever Filler Plots he gets up to now, it’s his business.

LIV: *Not if I have anything to say about it Face* #OperationGetRobronBackTogether

[Outside Rebecca’s Car with Robert, Liv and Rebecca]

REBECCA: *On the phone* Oh thanks mysterious investor.

ROBERT: *Ooh business things Face* Investor?

REBECCA: Yep, some random investor named Kath wants to invest into the business. I’m sure that will be a Plot Point later. Oh no, here’s Liv. I don’t know how much more of her #SpeakingForTheFandom I can take. I really didn’t want this Plot either. I swear. Couldn’t they just have let me be with Debbie?!

ROBERT: Yeah, I’m sure it would have been. Don’t worry. I’ll sort this. Hey Liv! A blonde I’d rather share scenes with!

LIV: We were a family you know! Me, Aaron and Robert. We had a cute name and everything. Roblivion. It was great. Why did you have to go and wreck it? #SpeakingForTheFandom

REBECCA: I really didn’t want this Plot either. But it’s a bit more complicated than that. Wow I wish I knew if I meant anything else by that, like that I have some sort of master plan. I probably just mean that I blame this all on Robert so it wasn’t me that wrecked anything. Look, I know you, as the proxy for the fans, are really upset that things didn’t turn out the way you’d hoped, but apparently I’m incapable of apologizing for my role in this.

LIV: Right...let me just question the paternity of this kid since you were also sleeping with Ross. The Theory Truthers need some hope these days. #LetTheTheoryLive

REBECCA: Look, apparently I have this supernatural connection to my womb tennant and so I know that it’s definitely Robert’s without ever having to do a simple DNA test. Why shut down the Theory once and for all when you can continue to give the Theory Truthers hope! #LetTheTheoryLive But look, let me just put some blame on Robert again cause it takes two to make this baby that I’m having whether anyone likes it or not. And again, I’m definitely not going to apologize for any of my part in any of this. Instead, I’m just going to drive away because I get really defensive anytime someone brings up paternity or tries to get me to accept responsibility for this. Bye.

*Rebecca drives off angrily*

LIV: Well, aren’t you going to go run off after your girlfriend? I hear the fans are constantly worried that the Plot is going to push you together again.

ROBERT: *Exasperated Face* We’re not together like that. We never were!

LIV: Yeah sure.

ROBERT: One night! This Plot only took one episode to ruin my life!

LIV: And Aaron’s! He loved you! And the fans’ for that matter, and mine.

ROBERT: Look! The Plot put a bottle of whiskey in my hands. I wasn’t thinking straight. I wanted him to hurt as much as I did because the Plot couldn’t possibly let us be happy for more than three weeks after our wedding. It had him doing drugs and not talking to me about what was going on with him in there. He was making you lie just so that it could go on for a little longer just so the Plot could force us into this #Mess

LIV: He was in prison! He was on drugs! He needed you!

ROBERT: Yeah, the Plot put him there because they wanted to facilitate this Pregnancy Plot for some unknown reason. And I fell for it. I let him down. And then I was totally going to tell him in prison but Chas via the Plot decided that wasn’t going to happen so it was decided that I should keep quiet about it, get her to as well but then the Plot dropped the pregnancy bomb and everything changed!

LIV: How could the Plot do this to us Rob?!?

ROBERT: I don’t know! All I’ve ever wanted is Aaron! Me, you, him, we were happy! The happiest I’ve ever been! And then the Plot had to go and ruin it because happy couples and families don’t stay on screen. AND NOW WE’RE STUCK IN THIS #MESS AND I HATE THE PLOT AND MYSELF AND HER AND THE BABY! #Relatable *Stalks off in a Plot Sulk*

LIV: *Wow the Plot needs me to sort this out Face* #OperationGetRobronBackTogether

[The Bridge with Robert and Liv]

LIV: You don’t have to have anything to do with Rebecca if you hate her that much.

(FANDOM: Wait...is that an option?!?!? Sign us up for that plan!)

ROBERT: It’s a bit more complicated than that. There’s this whole Filler Plot that I’m part of where I’m drugging her father for reasons unknown. Possibly because I’m having one long, slow breakdown. Possibly because I’m just bored and heartbroken. Who the hell knows at this point. But you know nothing about that and hopefully never will. #FingersCrossed But unfortunately, until proven otherwise, I’m this kid’s father. And that apparently means I need to be glued to her side. Otherwise, she wouldn’t have enough scenes to fulfill her contract.

LIV: Well that’s a whole lot of info I can’t process yet but I’m sure will come back to haunt me. But why can’t the Plot let you be with Aaron and be a dad. Look at half the couples in this village. That stuff works for them.

ROBERT: Logic like that doesn’t belong in the Hell Plot Liv. Plus the Plot made sure this was literally Aaron’s worst fears all rolled into one awful situation so there’s no way he could want this, even if he did try for a time. And I don’t blame him. If I could get out I would. I’d do anything to take that night back. The Incident. It still haunts me. And you can accuse me of betraying Aaron and letting him down and you’d be right. The Plot made sure of that. But don’t ever say I don’t love him. I’m gonna steal his line now for the parallels. I never stopped. I always will. #AreWeBackTogetherYet *Makes dramatic exit*

LIV: #OperationGetRobronBackTogether

[The Mill with Aaron and Liv]

AARON: *Living in Virtual Denial Land* #DenialLandIsFunAsFuck

LIV: *Pushes Aaron’s Denial Goggles up*

AARON: *Dazed and confused Face* Where have you been? I’m such a good parental figure, I barely even noticed you were gone.

LIV: I went to tell Rob what I thought of him.

AARON: What did you do that for? *Puts Denial Goggles back down* Denial Land is better Liv. You should try it.

LIV: *Pushes Denial Goggles back up* Aaron, wake up, he still loves you!

AARON: *Puts Denial Goggles back on* Yeah, and? The Plot sees fit to remind me why it broke us up every time I let myself believe that. It shoves Rebecca and her newfound bump in my face and I remember that he’s gonna be a dad and I have to try really hard to move on with my life. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going back to Denial Land. Ignoring the Plot is way better than dealing with it, at least while Robert is busy with his Filler Plots and the Hell Plot isn’t ready for its climax yet. So just sit down and join me or leave but I definitely, under no circumstances, want to talk about the Plot. #DenialLandIsFunAsFuck #IShouldHaveStayedInMauritus #AreWeBackTogetherYet

LIV: *You are impossible and I’m gonna have to do everything myself Face* #OperationGetRobronBackTogether

#robron #emmerdale #plotdale

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junker-town · 5 years

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9 thoughts I had watching ‘Little Giants’ for the first time

Little Giants takes place in the fictional town of Urbania, Ohio, where everyone has strange food traditions. | Warner Brothers production / SB Nation illustration

This movie is great.

I just finished watching Little Giants for the first time, and I’ve got to say it’s an absolute delight. It spreads the message of teamwork and determination, but also the problem with boomers and rampant corn wastage.

If you haven’t seen the movie, lemme give you the elevator pitch: A team of “losers,” coached by a “loser,” band together to beat a team of “winners” in a game of pee-wee football. In the end, everyone learns that friendship and family is the real prize.

Watching as an adult for the first time, here are my thoughts!

Kevin is a sad, sad dude.

Kevin O’Shea (Ed O’Neill) is unquestionably the tragic figure in this film. A star football player, we’re never told what caused Kevin to flame out of the NFL. Everyone talks about his high school career and the fact he won the Heisman, but he obviously didn’t make an impact in the pros. Instead, he moved back to Urbania, Ohio, started a Chevrolet dealership, and exists in a local diner to keep reminding old dudes that he was a legend. Even they’re growing tired of his shtick.

Kevin is a joke to his family, annoys almost everyone around him, and he’s only regarded highly by his brother, Danny (Rick Moranis), and assistant pee-wee coach Harold Butz (Joe Bays). The movie positions him as this winner, which I’m sure resonated with kids watching the movie — but to me, I couldn’t reconcile the inescapable sadness of this dude. He literally has nothing to live for but coaching this pee-wee team to try and cling to his fading glory. I struggle to find anything in this world sadder than people who are in their 30s and 40s excitedly recalling high school stories because they have achieved so little of note in the 20 years since.

It’s OK to dislike Kevin, though, because he’s a sexist asshole. He decides not to pick Becky “Icebox” O’Shea (Shawna Waldron) to be a member of his team, only because she’s a girl. This is his own niece, and Icebox friggin’ owns. She’s better than every kid in town, but she doesn’t make the team because of gender.

“Danny, I hate to break it to you, but Icebox is a girl. Now, maybe if you’d start treating her like a girl, she’d start acting like one.”

Kevin’s wife, Karen, even confronts him at dinner about not picking Icebox and he doubles down on the decision. He’s aptly called a chauvinist, and then we get to the most disturbing moment of the movie.

WHY DOES THE O’SHEA FAMILY NEED SO MUCH CORN?!

At the 13:11 mark of the movie, we’re introduced to an ordinary, run-of-the-mill dinner scene. I’ll admit I’ve never had this kind of nuclear family, serving-dish dinner thing — but this is a mess nonetheless. Four people are at the table: Kevin, Karen, and their daughters, Debbie and Priscilla. Nobody else is expected, and there is no mention of this being a special occasion or gathering.

I stopped multiple times while watching to ensure the veracity of the corn count. The count is solid, the count is good. So why the hell did the O’Shea family prepare 11 ears of corn for dinner? It’s such an oddly specific number. Who goes to the store and is like “11 ears of corn, please”?

This entire dinner scene is a mess. They’re eating ham, turkey, corn, broccoli, salad, rolls, mashed potatoes — there are TWO gravy boats on the table. This is a Thanksgiving spread on a weeknight. No wonder boomers robbed this earth of all its natural resources and put humanity on the brink of extinction.

The unexpected monologue about infertility and miscarriage, in a children’s movie.

At 24:32, Cheryl Berman brings her son, Jake, to the garage for football practice. Jake, a hacking and wheezing nerd, is the son of a hypochondriac who spends A FULL 2 MINUTES explaining to Danny about how Jake was almost a miscarriage.

“You can’t be too cautious. After all, we never thought we’d have children. Not after trying for 13 years. It was me. When I finally did get pregnant, the doctor ordered me off to bed. I spent nine miserable months on my back. If I’d rolled over I could have lost him. And the birth ... God only knows the pain. He weighed only 1 pound, 11 ounces — he spent the first six weeks of his life in an incubator — and I think football is just the medicine for him.”

Hey Little Giants, YOU’RE A KIDS MOVIE. Was this supposed to pull adults in? You know there are so many ways you can establish Jake being a germ kid without his mom giving a damn monologue on how he almost died in the womb. Jesus.

The weirdest grocery store in the world.

In dire need of a quarterbacks, some kids find Junior (Devon Sawa) at a grocery store throwing rolls of toilet paper into a grocery cart. Certified dreamboat Junior is the focus of this scene, but I couldn’t concentrate because of this stores shelves.

How many egg noodles are the people of Urbania consuming? Now, if we’re to assume that Urbania is basically Urbana, Ohio, then the population is somewhere around 12,000. There are 456 visible units of egg noodles on the shelf as Icebox walks past.

I went to my local store in Greenville, NC — population 93,000. There were 30 packages of egg noodles on the shelf split across brands. This means that expected egg noodle consumption in Urbania is 119 times greater than Greenville.

They also need boatloads of vegetable oil and applesauce too, apparently.

The only inference I can make from this is that Oily Apple Noodles is the town dish.

The secret weapon is a roided up child monster.

We’re basically at the midpoint of the movie, and Kevin’s Cowboys are starting to get a little concerned with Danny’s Giants. After a “hilarious” scheme where Danny calls the cops and infers that his own brother is a child molester spying on the kids, both are trying to find an edge.

And yes, there’s a surprise waiting for both of them: Spike, an adult-sized running back who just arrived in town with a flat-top sporting dad who’s bred him into being a football machine through the time-honored tradition of being a horrible parent.

The first time we see Spike on screen, he’s carrying a refrigerator out of the back of a U-Haul and scowling the entire time. This is not a happy child, and yet Danny can’t wait to get him on the team — even lying to ensure it’s a possibility.

Naturally, this all unravels. Spike is too aggressive, can only speak in the third person, and threatens everyone. He is a demonstrably horrible human — and it’s not his fault.

Urbania, home of giant ice.

We’ve already established that this town has some weird food traditions, but it turns out this extends to ice too.

Look at the size of those cubes in Becky’s soda. What is up with this diner that you order a drink and get two whiskey cubes?

Everything in this town is strange.

Enter John Madden and friends.

The Little Giants are at a crossroads. Torn apart by Spike’s attitude, they decide football isn’t fun anymore and walk away from the game. Thankfully, in a stunning case of deus ex Maddena, John Madden and a group of football stars are taking the bus to Canton for a Hall of Fame banquet. Lost, and in dire need of directions, Madden and Co. decide helping a pee-wee football team is more important than their prior commitment and meet with the team.

It’s unclear exactly what the NFL players add to the Little Giants. We’ll get to this later.

Someone PLEASE help these kids understand human sexuality.

So we’ve established that Becky is head-over-heels for Junior. The two meet at the side of the lake and talk about kissing, in a scene designed to tease a potential love angle in the film. Then we get this, utterly baffling exchange.

Junior: You want to learn how to kiss!? Becky: Hey, we’re going to have to learn how to do it sooner or later. I mean, you know, if you want to have kids and get a job and stuff. Junior: You can have kids without kissing. Becky: Yeah, but you can’t get a job.

Oh God, there’s a lot to unpack here. No matter which way you slice it, these kids are woefully confused about what it takes to start a career. Maybe the job market in Urbania circa 1994 was different, but the idea that you can’t get a job without kids is some backwards-ass thinking if even I’ve seen it.

The Battle for Urbania.

With 37 minutes remaining, we finally get to the big game between the Cowboys and the Little Giants, taking place on the world’s nicest pee-wee football field. The Giants are without Icebox, because Becky has decided to be a cheerleader instead of a player in an effort to make Junior think of her more like a girl.

Icebox, if he doesn’t like you for playing football, he doesn’t deserve you.

There is literally nothing else to do in Urbania, because the almost entire town has shown up — and those who can’t be there can listen to it on the radio because there’s an actual radio announcer FOR A CHILD’S FOOTBALL GAME.

This announcer (Harry Shearer of The Simpsons fame) is super inappropriate too. After one of the Giants is kicked in the groin he says:

“Someone’s holding about a pound of Aunt Betty’s nut butter right now.”

SIR, YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT A CHILD!

The Giants get utterly demolished in the first half, and they want to quit. Danny delivers a motivational speech, telling his team that while they might not be better overall, you never know what can happen in a game. Maybe, just maybe they can beat the Cowboys — once. That’s all it takes.

Amped up and ready to go, we hit the second half and the Giants look like a different team. It’s at this point the Giants call the cruelest play in the history of football at any level. Johnny has been established as a fairly somber kid. All he wants is his dad to notice him, but his dad is always leaving on business. Sad woodwind music accompanies all his scenes, and it’s a tragic B plot in the movie.

Johnny gets the handoff and lo and behold, his dad is back and waiting in the end zone. It’s here where Becky yells: “Just run to him!” Yes, the Giants are leveraging Johnny’s feelings of inadequacy and loneliness to win. It’s tragic.

Johnny, Johnny? Yes, papa? Scoring touchdowns? Yes, papa Telling lies? No, papa I love you now. WAA WAA WAA

Finally, after its presence being teased all movie long, we finally get to see “The Annexation of Puerto Rico,” the trick play devised by Nubie (Matthew McCurley) that he discussed with Madden. It’s a hidden ball play with swelling music, and against the odds it works.

The Giants win, Danny is elated. Kevin is utterly devastated because not only did he lose the game and therefore his entire reason for existence, but he also bet his entire car dealership on the game because he’s an idiot.

Think about this for a second: All Kevin has in this life is football and his business. He just lost both. Payback for his sexism and corn wastage, in my opinion.

Danny, merciful as he is, says he doesn’t plan to take the business and asks if they want to coach together. The movie closes with the town water tower being repainted from honoring Kevin O’Shea to “The O’Shea Brothers,” because in Urbania winning a single pee-wee game is the equivalent to a Heisman career.

Final thoughts.

This is a good-ass kids sports movie that I’m angry I didn’t see before now. I 100 percent would have had a major crush on Icebox if I watched this as a kid, because she’s one of the greatest characters in any kid’s sport movie.

The best sports movies have characters you can identify with and make you feel like you’re in the movie. Shoutout to farting lineman Rudy Zolteck (Michael Zwiener) for making me feel like one of the gang.

I give Little Giants nine ears of corn out of 10 plates of Urbania Oily Apple Noodles.

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whatatime30 · 6 years

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Dying Stars (2)

(1) (2)

“Sleep is literally us just dying over and over again, isn’t it? Then… when we finally die, of course, we sleep forever. I read a quote once-- Edgar Allen Poe’s, I think-- about sleep being little slices of death. I’m pretty sure I subscribe to that. Do you?” Henry inspected the meteor rock. “Bartholomew? Can I call you Bart? Not that I don’t like your name… it’s just… Bart’s easier to say, so yeah.” The rock was sharp and prickly, nearly piercing Henry’s hand.

The man pulled his camera out of the drawer. “I could be a photographer if I wanted.” He laughed. “The models probably move too much, you know? It wouldn’t be good. I could photograph dead models though. They wouldn’t move too much.” Henry sighed. “Sleep’s annoying though.”

The shutter of the camera was the only noise besides Henry’s humming. Snap. “Hey-ey-ey-ey-ey… Where will you be waking up tomorrow morning,” he sang quietly. “Heh, that’s funny… you know, cause they didn’t wake up.” He chuckled. “Pictures all done.”

Henry sighed. “You look sharp, Bart.” He returned the sample. “How’d you get down here anyway? ‘Least you didn’t get burned. When I was--”

“Who’re you talking to,” a voice asked. Henry turned around to see Dr. Luke.

“Hi, Dr. Luke.”

“It’s Adam, Henry, and who’re you talking to?”

“No one.”

“...oh. Well, do you have the day’s report? When you finish it, you can go home.”

“I have time for another one if I--”

“It’s six o’clock. Dinner is at six thirty.” The man sighed. “It’s burger night.” That meant salty, heart disease inducing french fries for the doctor. Henry figured he loved them.

It was six o’ clock. Dr. Luke’s wife always had dinner ready at six thirty. Dr. Luke lives eighteen miles away. Henry knows because he drove the man to work and back once when Dr. Luke’s car broke down. Dr. Luke can’t leave until Henry does. “I just have to put him back in the freezer… then I’m done.” Henry put Bart back inside then handed three files to Dr. Luke. “Goodbye, Dr. Luke.”

The older man laughed. “Goodbye, Henry.”

***

“Henny!” The chestnut woman’s lips curved into a smile as she let him inside.

Henry waved. “Hi, Miss Henrietta.” He could hear Betty yelling for him from the sitting room. “Bye, Miss Henrietta.” He traipsed to the room.

His mother sat straightly with a book. She was, of course, in her wispy bun and wearing the same white, pearl necklace. His father had bought it when he proposed her. “Henry,” she greeted.

“Hey, mom.” He leaned down to give her a kiss on the cheek.

“You smell like burnt almond.”

A lot of the rocks smelled like that. “Sorry.”

“At least you’re cleaner than your brother. He and your dad went hunting. I sent him for a shower. Musty, those two.”

Henry didn’t much care for hunting. He only liked to see things before and after they were sleeping, never in between. “That’s nice.”

“Sit.”

He took a seat by her, playing with his fingers.

“How’s Leslie?”

“Leslie?”

“The woman Debbie set you up with.”

“Oh.”

She sighed. “I do wish you’d call on a girl, Harry. You aren’t getting any younger.”

Only Betty, the original southern belle, would tell him to call on a girl.

“You do like girls?”

They had this conversation often. It always ended the same way. “I do.”

“Then why won’t you marry one?”

“I will.”

“Have you even been with one?”

“...not yet, no.”

She sighed again. Her sigh was worse than the scraping of fingernails on a chalkboard. She set the book down on the coffee table. Her cup of tea clinked as she picked it up off of the tray. He wondered why her hands were trembling.

“Louise’s girl is nice.”

“Who?”

“Aprel. She’s nice and sweet.”

“Okay.”

“I’ll have her forward me the number. Y’all’d make beautiful babies.”

“Okay, Mom.”

She sipped from her cup. It smelled like the same sour lemon tea she always had. “Did you want some?”

He shook his head. Betty was always too much for his senses. He glanced out the window. All was silent until Henry’s brother and dad came clunking into the room, their shoes scuffing along the pristine white carpet. “Harry,” his dad started. “Didn’t expect to see you here.”

Henry shrugged.

The man bent down to kiss his wife on her rouged cheek. “I won’t be at dinner tonight, meeting with the senator.”

She nodded, putting her tea down. “Okay. Be safe.”

“I will.” He exited the room briskly.

Henry stood and waved awkwardly at his older brother. “Hey, Rob,” he said weakly.

“How’s my little Necromaniac Astronomer doing?” They were adopted brothers. Henry remembered that fact a lot. He doubted he would ever forget it.

“Robert,” Betty warned.

Rob laughed, clapping Henry on the back. “Calm down, Mom.”

“You know I--”

“It’s a joke.”

She huffed. “You make it too often.”

He rolled his eyes.

Henry knew then that he was in for a night.

@jasonredtoddhood

#heidiwritesstories #writing #prose #my stories are my home #short stories #stories #pls reblog if you like #hope y'all like it

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itsyourchoicedevotionals · 7 years

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Taking The Hits

“But his own people have been robbed and plundered, enslaved, imprisoned, and trapped. They are fair game for anyone and have no one to protect them, no one to take them back home.” Isa 42:22NLT

When we’re born again, we all start out on a very broad field at the foot of the cross. Salvation removes us from satan’s kingdom— lost to him. Life’s game changes completely in satan’s rule book. He’s no longer able to keep us from heaven, but….. he can try his best to keep us ineffective, and out of God’s perfect will for our lives.

Hence, we become targets! In our walks with the Lord, we’ve taken the hits— literally our home was robbed twice. God asked us to forgive the thieves. Louis was to the cleaners by cheating employers, loosing thousands. He suffered unable to do anything, in Gen 31:7NIV: “…has cheated me by changing my wages ten times. However, God has not allowed him to harm me.” But like Jacob, he won because God has been our Helper and Support. These incidents were all warfare— taking the hits from satan.

Since I began writing devotionals, I’ve been under one physical attack after another. What I write to you, I’m practicing in real life.

Our Indiana preacher played a game Sunday morning with about fifteen of the congregation. The back of the church represented the place for newly saved people. There were six spaces down the aisle between the pulpit and the back door. Each space represented a level of salvation each person could come to in their walk with Jesus. The point of the game was to get to level seven, and stay there— God’s perfect will— without taking hits. Meanwhile the preacher was shooting off nerf bullets, as he represented satan. If a person took a hit, they had to go backwards one place. All those in the congregation represented the world.

Some rushed to the front to be hit over and over and end up going back to being only saved, where the bullets couldn’t hit. Others hid behind the larger people to avoid taking hits. One kept his feet on the fourth level, but his body was hiding behind the chairs; having some of Jesus but keeping close touch in the world.

As the congregation watched they were laughing and heckling the ones who’d chosen to participate. Suddenly, I realized this is an exact picture of the church. We didn’t need the world picking on the body of Christ. The church participates very well in judging other believers who aren’t just like them. God made us all unique in looks, and personalities, although there are many similarities. Yet we want to pound each other into a mold exactly like us. Why?

Watching this single sermon brought about a tremendous paradigm shift in Lou and I’s thinking. Issues were resolved in a moment, as we realized— the issues weren’t coming from people but from satan using people. To engage in the issues placed us as judgmental hecklers inside the church. Not a good place!

Can you visualize what I’ve said? Does it make sense? Isn’t it better to pray for all other Christians around us? The last phrase of our text hit me in the face this morning— “have no one to protect them, no one to take them back home.” We can’t take hits for others, but we can pray for their faith to endure. Thus, scripturally protecting and taking them home. Will you pray or judge and heckle? It’s your choice. You choose.

PRAYER: Father God thank You a million times over for opening my eyes to seeing this warfare we’re in. Help everyone reading this to see as well and have a paradigm shift in their thinking, in Jesus’ name I pray.

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samtheflamingomain · 7 years

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hillary the thief

Alright. Here we go. Donna Brazile.

In case you're not policitally in the loop, Brazile dropped a bomb on us a week ago. If you're even remotely interested in politics, this is a story you need to hear.

Let's start with her Origin Story to get some background.

Debbie Wasserman-Schultz previously held Brazile's position as chairperson of the Democratic National Party. Now, that position is held by Tom Perez, unimportant corporate Democrat.

In the middle sat Donna Brazile, the chairwoman of the DNC during Hilary's run. Maybe you heard the story back during the primaries where Hillary was given debate questions ahead of time. That was Brazile, and it's largely why she is no longer the chair.

But she's not off in the woods. She came out a couple weeks ago with an article in Politico that has a lot of mind-blowing revelations.

Not because you're stupid but because this is very convoluted, I'm going to try and dumb this down as much as possible for all of our sanities.

Basically, it's proven fact now that the DNC literally rigged the primary election against Bernie Sanders. Let's go through how and why.

If you wanted to donate to Hillary Clinton's political campaign, the maximum you could donate as an individual OR company was around $2500. If you donate to the DNC, that limit is about $350,000.

The DNC, after Obama's runs, has been sorely hurting for money. And Hillary is great at raising money. In exchange for raising money for the DNC, Hillary wanted one thing: complete authoritarian control of the Party.

So she would raise money from big donors who would give hundreds of thousands of dollars to the "DNC", but Hillary would take 90% of those funds for her own campaign and give the DNC an "allowance" that allows them to, just barely, keep operating.

Now, there's a part of the DNC called the "Victory Fund". They collect money from donors giving to the PARTY (or so they thought) and gave it to Hillary. The Fund is actually supposed to be used to help whomever wins the election. Hillary was using the money from this Fund for her primary campaign against Bernie.

Basically, if Bernie had won the nomination, he would've had zero financial support from the Party because it had no money because it gave all of it to Hillary before she'd even gotten the nomination.

If this situation sounds like money laundering, it's because it absolutely is. Hillary raising her money through the DNC is a fancy way of her skirting the system. She got those funds illegitimately, but because it went through the Party, it had the appearance, from the outside, of normalcy.

But wait, there's more! There was an official document that Brazile came upon called the Joint Fundraising Agreement. In this Agreement, it outright stated that, in exchange for getting the scraps that Hillary threw toward the DNC for operating purposes, she would be in control of the operation, the finances, and the strategy of the entire DNC.

Hillary controlled staffing, budgeting, analytics, and even press releases. If the DNC wanted to release something, they literally had to run it by Hillary first.

Brazile herself sums it up nicely: "If the fight had been fair, one campaign would not have control of the party before the voters had decided which one they wanted to lead."

One final point that I think is very telling, not about Hillary or Brazile, but Bernie.

Brazile called him when she found all this out. She was nearly in tears, not knowing what to expect. But Bernie took it like a fucking professional. He knew it was too late, he'd already been robbed of lost the nomination. So he asked her, "What are Hillary's chances?" And when Brazile told him she didn't believe the polls and had seen a distinct lack of enthusiasm for her, that's when Bernie put his nose to the grindstone campaigning for her. He knew nothing could change the primary, not even this obvious corruption of the Party.

He put his country first and tried harder than some of us would've liked to get her elected because he fucking had to. But it wasn't enough.

Anyway, can't change the past and spilt milk and all that. But what's important is that this doesn't happen again. How? Informing the people, and making them vote. That's the only way we fix this.

Stay Greater. And vote, goddammit.

Obligatory "Bernie would've won".

#donna brazile #hillary clinton #bernie sanders #dnc #corruption #politics #sam

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mavwrekmarketing · 7 years

Link

Instagram reality vs Instagram expectation.

Image: mashable composite: boomerrphelps/instagram

If social media usage ever becomes an Olympic sport which is truly not that unthinkable at the rate were moving there will be but one participant worthy of a gold medal: Boomer Phelps.

The one-year-old son of Olympic legend Michael Phelps and his wife,Nicole, first captured the hearts of America while cheering on his dad from the stands of the 2016 Rio Olympics in a massive pair of patriotic protective earmuffs.

Since then hes learned to walk, mastered the art of eating solid foods, and amassed an impressive 785K followers on Instagram, bringing pure, undeniable joy to timelines across the world.

SEE ALSO: Say hello to your favorite 2032 Olympic swimmer, Boomer Phelps

In a troubling time where social platforms should come withopen at your own risk warnings, Mashable needed to know more about Boomer Phelps the sole beacon of light shining through the darkness of 2017 social media so we did the only logical thing: called his mom.

Nicole Phelps, 2010s Miss California USA and mother of the best baby on Instagram, gave us an inside look at all things Boomer, sharing the story behind his account and revealing who runs it, along with her son’s 2032 Olympic plans.

But most importantly, she confirmed what we already knew to be true: the kid is freaking adorable.

Here are a few of the many things we love about Boomer.

Hes a mini Michael Phelps

You know that saying, Like23-time Olympic gold medalist father, like son? Welp, its true. Boomer is just as obsessed with water as his dad.

Pool time!!!

A post shared by boomer phelps (@boomerrphelps) on Jun 14, 2017 at 12:50pm PDT

Nicole says that for Boomer, it was love at first bath. “We learned at a very early age that was the best way to make Boomer relax, just to get him in the water, she said. It must run in the family. He loves the pool, he loves the bath, he loves taking showers any way he can get into the water hes happy.

Sure, Michael’s retired but lucky for us Boomer is just beginning.

Hes a star in the making

Think about it how often do we get to see a potential future Olympian grow up right before our eyes? And though we don’t know whether Boomer will follow in his father’s footsteps yet, his mom isn’t ruling out anything.

“Honestly, you never know. Boomer definitely seems to have a passion for the water,” she said.

Thanks @taylorchien for making me look so good in my play day at the pool!!

A video posted by boomer phelps (@boomerrphelps) on Sep 2, 2016 at 12:38pm PDT

The couple claim they aren’t pushing Olympic fame (really?), but Boomer seems pretty content splashing around.

Are they really just going to let this talent go to waste? “The most important thing that I think Debbie [Michael’s mom] did for Michael was just allow him to do what he wanted to do, so if Boomer does decide that 2032 is his year and hes gonna go for it then well back him 100 percent,” she said.

Still, Michael’s coach Bob Bowman who posts some precious pics of baby Phelps himself says Boomer definitely “has the kick.” And much like the rest of America, in Nicole’s eyes, the only thing cooler than Boomer in the Olympics would be if Ryan Lochte’s new baby boy, Caiden Zane, made the team, too.

“Oh my gosh, that would be so cute,” she said, laughing about the dream 2032 teammates. “It would be awesome.”

I found daddy’s cap today and wanted to hop in the pool!

A post shared by boomer phelps (@boomerrphelps) on Apr 27, 2017 at 8:36am PDT

But if Boomer decides the athlete life isn’t for him, that’s fine. He already has another cool fallback … drumming. “We actually have a drum for him and hell sit there just drumming away with the wrist movements and everything,” Nicole said.

A drummer? Named Boomer? Does this get any better?

His appreciation of food could not be more relatable

Like all great Instagram personalities, Boomer isn’t shy about sharing food pics. He adores cheese (same) and gets extremely psyched for meal time, according to mom. “Hell sit in his high chair and he gets really excited and throws an arm up like hes riding a bull,” she said. “He rocks back and forth and just makes his entire high chair scoot across the floor.”

All the cheese I want!!! #boomersworld

A post shared by boomer phelps (@boomerrphelps) on May 25, 2017 at 5:41pm PDT

Yummmy!!! Watermelon and chicken for lunch today.

A post shared by boomer phelps (@boomerrphelps) on May 27, 2017 at 12:53pm PDT

He cherishes the weekend as much as the rest of us

Sure, Boomers account is a hub of positivity, but this baby is not immune to longing for the weekend. Being the very relatable baby he is, Boomer loves to lounge around and get down on Friday. You can tell by this very attractive photo of him waiting for the week to be over.

Is it the weekend yet?!?!?

A post shared by boomer phelps (@boomerrphelps) on Feb 22, 2017 at 7:40am PST

Boomer Phelps is all of us.

He even makes sponsored #content ok … ish

Boomer is already using his platform to endorse products, and surprisingly, we don’t totally hate it. He’s partnering with Huggies Little Swimmers to teach water safety to everyone who doesn’t have the luxury of having a professional swimmer for a parent. So that basically means we’re in for a whole bunch of adorable Instagram videos of him and his dad in the pool.

He keeps things light and breezy

Boomer clearly loves life and that’s what makes his account so perfect. It’s literally just a happy, innocent little baby having a blast and with today’s online political brawls and insult-slinging troll armies, that’s pretty darn refreshing.

All smiles!!!

A post shared by boomer phelps (@boomerrphelps) on Apr 14, 2017 at 12:57pm PDT

Nicole explained that we see a lot of negativity on social media these days, so she and Michael are doing their best to teach Boomer to find beauty in everyday life. “I think that our biggest thing is that we want people to smile when they see Boomer, and if that is where they find their light on a daily basis then so be it,” she said.

So whos the voice of Boomer’s Instagram?

It turns out Michael Phelps is running Instagram’s best account.

“Ill take all the pictures, send them to Michael, and then he talks for Boomer and posts,” Nicole explained. “He asked me if I wanted the password once and Im like, ‘Nope. I want nothing to do with it, this is all you.”

Just hanging with mom and dad…. dad and I are teaming up on mom in some rummy!! #wewon

A post shared by boomer phelps (@boomerrphelps) on May 20, 2017 at 6:45am PDT

Started from the bottom now Boomer’s here

“It took on a life of its own that I dont think either of us really expected,” Nicole said about the account.

When Michael decided to do the first post as a way for family, friends, and fans to follow Boomer, he had nearly 2,000 followers. After the 2016 Olympic trials he surpassed 100,000 followers and kept going, leaving his own mother and Olympic athletes in his wake. “We always joke that were going to take this account away from him when he’s older and make him get his own followers.”

I can stand! Watch out… I’m going to be walking soon!

A post shared by boomer phelps (@boomerrphelps) on May 24, 2017 at 8:53pm PDT

But doesn’t Nicole worry about thrusting her child into the spotlight? Apparently not.

Nicole said she and Michael knew they wanted to secure a handle for Boomer before he was born, simply because they didn’t want somebody else to have the power to post under his name.

“Weve gone back and forth whether or not its good or bad.”

“Weve gone back and forth whether or not its good or bad,” she explained, but ultimately the couple likes knowing they’re the ones posting shots of their son and can show fans that they’re a normal family living a normal life.

So how does Boomer’s following compare to his Instababy competition? Well, he’s sadly not in the lead, but we know the kid’s got potential. While other famous Instababies like Dream Kardashian (son of Rob Kardashian and Blac Chyna) have already hit one million followers before age one, everyone knows deep down that quality of posts is more important than follower quantity.

So there you have it folks, definitive proof that Boomer is everything you need in an Instagram idol.

WATCH: The USA swim team just did its own version of carpool karaoke and nailed it