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lxlahss · 3 months

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hi lovely, honestly tg for your blog. i love seeing more poc writers write for carmy for obvious reasons 🥹. i’m rewatching the bear and the bear tiky toks at the same time. i’m just reigniting my love for sydcarmy, so i’m on an angst train rn. i think somewhere in season 2, carmy tells sydney that he needs her or something to that effect. would you be down to write something where carmy and the reader had gotten into a little argument, and they haven’t really spoken since then. nat invited them over for dinner with her and pete before the argument and it’s evident that there’s still tension in the air once they sit down for dinner. being the sister and sister-in-law that she is, nat wants to fix things so she’s telling carmy to go to talk his girl, and he’s all like “i tried! she’s still mad at me.” nat’s just like “well, i wonder why! have you told her, ‘i’m sorry?’ or how you’re actually doing?” because let’s be honest carmy cannot think straight without this girl let alone do his best at the bear without her being a guiding force in anyway humanly possible. tysm for taking this on! also in advance, what should be call you? do you have an alias/name that way i can address you properly next time. — 🥣.

hii my love, it makes my heart so happy that u like my blog🤍🥹

i'm truly so new to this and it's so encouraging to hear from other people, especially pocs that i can relate to. y'all are so cutie and inspiring i love it. for future reference love, you can call me lilah <3

i feel like carmen would try so hard to keep his anger under control when it comes to you that once he sees you getting riled up he'll physically have to leave the situation, or close his eyes and take a deep breathe so he won't yell or raise his voice lmao

so thats how you guys left it this morning. you started an argument with him about him not letting you know he was staying overtime at the restaurant and instead of arguing back, he grabbed his coat and left, only texting you to ask if you made it to work and that he was there to pick you up. of course you didn't respond, only liking his message when he let you know that he was outside.

you walked out onto the sidewalk and watched carmen reach over the center console to open the door for you. you got inside and pulled your lip liner out of your purse, touching up your makeup in the mirror without saying a word to carmy.

carmen pulled out of the parking spot with a deep sigh, keeping one hand tight on the wheel as the other rubbed down his face frustratedly. "how was work," he asked, not taking his eyes off the road.

"fine," you said simply before throwing your lip liner back in your purse and turning your head to look out the window.

the rest of the car ride was silent, with carmen resting his head against the calloused palm of his hand and you pretending the cars driving past were the most interesting things you've ever seen.

"you gonna keep being like this all night?" he asked you, pulling up to his sister's house.

"nah carmen i'm good," you said while furrowing you're eyebrows and slamming his car door closed. he had been with you long enough to know that you were not good. he jogged up to catch up with you as you waited in front of the door, locking his car as he did so before ringing the bell.

nat opened the door and you mustered up the most convincing smile you could make, wrapping your arms around her in a hug as she lightly kissed your cheek. "hi my love," you greeted her in a soft voice, noticing pete standing behind her. carmy said hi to his sister and pete and eventually you all sat in the living room as y'all waited to eat. nat had offered you a glass of wine, which you accepted a little too fast. so there you sat, an awkward enough distance away from carmy, with one leg crossed over the other. he had barely spoken to anyone, let alone you, forcing nat and pete to lead the conversations.

you refused to look at carmen, even when you felt him looking at you, which made natalie tilt her head in confusion.

"bear, help me make y/n's plate," she said as she stood up, motioning for him to follow her.

"yeah of course," he would answer with a slight grumble, groaning as he stood up to follow his sister.

"okay what the fuck? what's the matter with you two?" she whispered harshly at him, handing him a plate. he furrowed his eyebrows in a way that resembled one of your favorite facial expressions. y'all spent way too much time together. "what d'you mean?" he asked, starting to plate your salad.

"you guys aren't talking or anything, you're barely even sitting together," she said.

carmen then grabbed a serving spoon to pile pasta onto your plate. "we got into it this morning before work sugar," he started, "i left before it could get too bad though."

nat stood quiet for a few seconds. "you left in the middle of the argument?"

then, carmen stood quiet for a few seconds. "yeah?"

natalie pursed her lips and tilted her head to the side. "and you thought that was a good idea... why?"

carmen grabbed a napkin to place under your plate for you as he grabbed a bread roll. "i didn't feel like arguing, so i left before i could argue. i texted her to see if she made it to work okay, and tried asking 'bout her day but she's mad at me."

natalie scoffed before taking out some salad dressing from her fridge, "yeah i wonder why!"

"what?"

"what do you mean what?"

carmen shook his head as he pointed to himself, "i-i'm confused on what i did that's so wrong."

natalie rolled her eyes before looking at her brother right in the eyes. "have you tried saying sorry?"

carmen clenched his jaw, looking down at the plate of food. "no, actually. i haven't."

natalie nodded slowly, processing the information. "have you tried actually trying to talk about the argument?"

her brother just stood quiet before lightly throwing his head back, groaning out a "no."

walking up to him, nat placed her hand on his forearm with softened eyes. "bear, staying mad at each other is stupid. you know how you are with her versus when you're not." she grabbed another bottle of wine as she headed out of the kitchen. looking over her shoulder to look at her brother, she whispered, "apologize."

carmy waited in the kitchen for a few to think. you truly were a light that he never knew he could have. hell, he barely thought he deserved you. yes, you had an attitude. but, you had a legitimate reason for your attitude. and it was on him to apologize to give you reassurance.

walking back out to the living room he handed you your plate, leaning down next to you to place a small kiss on your cheek before whispering in your ear, "i'm sorry baby."

he sat down and cautiously placed his arm over your shoulder, feeling his heart almost explode when he felt you lightly lean into him. "we can talk about it in the car, okay?" he said lowly, just so you could hear.

you nodded your head softly before bringing a forkful of pasta up to his mouth to let him try. "okay," you whispered back to him.

and that's what you guys did. you sat in the car outside of nat's house for an extra 20 minutes after yall left to talk about what had happened and how you guys felt. you guys made a promise to do better when it came to arguing, and agreed to never leave the house or go to sleep mad at each other.

#carmen berzatto fanfiction #carmen berzatto #carmen berzatto imagine #carmy the bear #the bear #carmen berzatto x you #carmen berzatto fic #carmen berzatto x reader #carmy berzatto x reader #carmy berzatto x you #asks

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after-nine-at-the-oasis · 2 years

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Ooh promo time

Dang thought that was a rough thing to end on xdd :'(( 😭

Why are y'all all saying he's gonna be fine

That's sus

Like for a promo anyway xDD but honestly in general too lol

OPE

IDK WHAT THAT MEANS BUT DOES THAT MEAN IT'S LIVE

THAT DOES SEEM LIKE PLAUSIBLE DRAMA- aAH

ಠOಠ

UHHHHH

Yeah I am also asking what is happening xD

BUT YEAH SURE give Asher more trauma why don't ya xDD let's just go all the way!!!

What would be next idk that's two kinds of weapons maybe a knife next?? xDD

I mean obviously everyone else, especially that new girl I hope she's doing okay :((((, but like. my boy xDD. And besides I said I'd give him trauma myself if no one else will. I mean we haven't seen it YET I'm honestly assuming we will/might at some point but still lol.

Anyway so that looks ROUGH what next xdd

Oof

Oh GOSH oh no

NOOOOOO not my father son duo too 😭😭😭

I swear y'all better not leave this too long to be fixed

Like yeah feel your emotions take as long as you need but SHOW WISE I can't last that long 😭😭 xD

Anyway A H help me

That's the end of my final thoughts :)! Now onto the. . .

REVIEW

I LOVED this episode!! The patients/cases were interesting, seeing everyone navigate their relationships (existent or non) was fun, and I honestly just thought it was a fun episode :). Even if every time Lim came on screen it got super serious and dramatic. Except for maybe that first meeting lol. Still, I enjoyed those moments too! Now, a quick bit for each character/few characters.

Lim! OW. How dare you do this to me. I can just SEE all the pain she's in (everyone's acting has been absolutely PHENOMENAL by the way), but I'm scared of where this crusade will take her. Also that last scene with Shaun was mature and I think the right choice in her part for this situation but still heartbreaking 😭😭😭😭.

Jordan! Girlllll, we all see it 👀😏😎. She is crushing on him HARD, and I don't even remember his name lol xD. I think his last name's like, Perez. Yeah I think that sounds right. Wait, but the girl's starts with a P too. . . Whatever, I really hope they do end up getting together, if only for Jordan's sake :)). But I do think they'd work well together!

Asher and Jerome :D! Y'all I love you xD. But also this closet thing better not ever come up again because if it does then it's a plot point which means you'll get caught, and I CAN'T HANDLE THAT. So please don't XDD. Anyway I thought they were really cute this episode :)).

Park, and Powell! Also a quick bit about Morgan: we didn't see her much this episode but she is as always an icon <333. Rewatching a bit I did see the part where Powell skipped chain of command, and I won't say I think she was right there, but her story was really touching and I think it was a big part of helping that mom :')). Also I loved Park thanking her for her service at the end 😭😭. Anyway, I guess despite my guesses, Park's not gonna talk to the relationship lady now ಠ⁠_⁠ಠ. My bad xdd.

Glassman! OOF, his and Lim's scenes hurt, but I'm glad he stood by Shaun's decision even though he's angry. Even though he doesn't agree, honestly! Because while Shaun does need to take some more accountability, he really did do what he saw as the best option, and who knows what would've happened without it. Still, super angsty <333. Great yelling though :D. XD.

Andrews! Didn't see him much, a bit mad he gave Lim the report lol, but she does deserve to see it.

Shaun and Lea! THAT LAST SCENE WAS THE CUTEST THING I'VE EVER SEEN. I swear, I will never get over it 😭😭😭😭😭❤️❤️🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰😭😭😭❤️🥰🥰. Anyway, I'm really glad they talked about their issues promptly, got good advice, and sorted something out :))). They're amazing, and I love them :DD <3333.

Overall, I really enjoyed this episode!!! I thought it was great, and spread the focus pretty evenly between the characters. Plus, I'm glad one of the patients got their happy ending :'). But I mean honestly? In different ways, both of them did. What a great episode :D <3.

So yeah! I really liked this episode. The next one looks intense, but I'm excited to see how it all goes down! This has been my review of. . .

The Good Doctor, Season 6, Episode 3: A Big Sign

It was so good! I'm a bit scared for the next episode, but really looking forward to it. I'll be back next week with my review of. . .

The Good Doctor, Season 6, Episode 4: Shrapnel

See you then!!

#the good doctor #tgd #oasis's tgd chatter #I was busy last night so it's a bit late but I finished it and here it is :DD!!!#love you guys :))) ❤️❤️❤️❤️#byeeee :DDD <33333!!!!

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catholicdaredevil · 2 years

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could i get something with matt where it’s like you guys act married but are hiding the fact that you’re in love with the other person from each other because you’re both stupid when it comes to feelings and everyone you meet assumes you’ve been together forever even though you’re not actually a couple?

so since i'm only really doing little drabbles right now i'm changing this a bit to just fake dating at a wedding because somehow in my brain i got the entire request a little backwords in my head when i started and didn't realize i was wrong till like halfway through but i hope you enjoy!! also i hope no one notices or minds me cycling through new girl character names as my randomly named side characters since i'm in the middle of a rewatch. this ended up longer than i thought and i kind of lost my way towards the end so maybe not my best work but hey i'm gonna put this under a keep reading since it ended up around 1.5k words

"matt please, i can't go single. it'd be way too embarrassing, you know nick's gonna be there, and with his girlfriend-"

"is this the girl he cheated on you with?"

"yes."

"then fine i'm in."

when you'd gotten the invitation to your old college friends wedding you had been excited. you hadn't seen her in years, life and jobs getting in the way of being able to meet up and see each other. plus weddings were a lot of fun, you got to see a bunch of old friends, dress up, and get absolutely fucking plastered. that is until you found out your old boyfriend who you dated for all of college and two years into law school, that you thought you were going to get married to, that you had been deeply in love with. who had then broken your heart into a million little pieces by cheating with your old coworker. you were excited until you found out he was going.

your old boyfriend who had left you needing not only a new boyfriend, but a new apartment and job. the one bedroom you shared significantly more crowded once his new girlfriend moved in less than a week after you found out.

luckily you had two friends you had let you move in with them while you looked for a new apartment. even more luckily one of them had just agreed to be your fake date to the wedding, so you wouldn't have to go alone.

"ugh, you're the best matty. i gotta go pick out a dress," you surged forward to smack the loudest kiss on his cheek before rushing out of nelson and murdock.

it was one wedding. he'd be fine right? he could pretend to be your boyfriend and not slip up and admit he was desperately in love with you. right?

wrong.

it had been going great. he'd picked you up on time, in the suit he knew was your favorite no less. and your heart, like every other time he wore it, skipped at least three beats when you had opened your door. his cheeks a deep red, as he held his hand out for you to take. just a quick taxi ride to the other side of town and a couple deep breaths by both of you before you entered the hotel and there you were. at a wedding. pretending to be dating.

if he felt the way your whole body was trembling just slightly with his arm casually around your waist he kept it to himself. you had calmed down about ten minutes into the ceremony, which was beautiful really. but as you settled down, he found himself gearing up. it really was a nice ceremony and he tried so hard to not sit there and overthink every aspect of this in his mind.

was he supposed to kiss you? was it okay if he did? how far did pretending have to go? god why did it have to be pretend. why couldn't he have just told you, preferably years ago, that he was in love with you. then maybe you could be real dating at this wedding instead of this embarrassing facsimile of his want.

"matt, it's over. just the reception and then we can go, i promise."

so caught up in his head he hadn't even realized the crowded room had finished clapping and people slowly filtered out to go towards dinner. he cleared his throat, snatched his bearings tightly and stood letting you lead him to your table.

you grabbed both yourself and him plates of food and after dropping them off with him at the table then worked your way back through the crowd to get drinks. he felt so awkward, sitting alone at the table, at an event where he really only knew you. he thinks he met your friend, the one getting married, maybe twice back in law school. each time at some shitty bar in a large group, everyone getting shit faced after finals or something.

"matt," that voice had him clenching his teeth as he turned to face it. "so good to see you again dude, i didn't realize you'd been invited."

before he could even open his mouth to respond, your scent drifted closer as you stepped up next to nick in front of him.

"he didn't. well not officially, we came together." your words stiff, the fake air of nonchalance stale around you. you set the drinks in your hands down on the table and maneuvered around your ex boyfriend to sit.

"hey baby, thanks for getting my drink," he grabbed the hand that had just set his glass down in front of him to press a gentle kiss to your palm before holding it in his lap.

you tried to cover up the heat in your cheeks by quickly drinking the glass of wine in your free hand but couldn't help but watch nick out of the corner of your eye to see his reaction. it was worth it to watch the dumb look on his face as he put two and two together and came up, finally, with four.

"oh. so you guys are like dating, huh?" nick's clipped tone got under matt's skin. how was he gonna be annoyed like he wasn't the one who cheated on you. he had no right.

"someth-"

"yes." your body jerked straight up and you choked on your own spit silently as nick and matt had a stare down. a very pointless action when matt was not only blind but wearing his usual red sunglasses. matt met the gesture anyways, before he heard your quiet choking and turned back to face you. "i've been in love with you since the day i met you."

he continued to grip your hand, his thumb running across your knuckles under the table. something in the way he said it, in the way his skin felt against yours had things shifting into perspective. there was a revelation here, bubbling underneath the surface if you just dug for it. this was almost too real.

"i- um, congrats. really, that's uh that's cool, i uh i gotta go," neither you or matt turned to watch nick leave, his brain panicking at the way you froze. shit, he'd gone too far. you really should have come up with a plan before, and now he's fucked it up.

"matt, are you-"

your words trailed off and your eyebrows pinched together your brain still struggling to make sense of things. oh how quickly the whole night had gotten turned around. he couldn't have actually meant it, could he? he could just be that good at acting, except matt was a terrible liar when it came down to it, so if it wasn't acting.

"shit, i'm sorry, i'm so sorry, i don't know why i said that. i didn't mean to make it weird, we can go, i'm sorry." matt dropped your hand like it burnt him, grabbing his cane he stood. you stared down at your hands, the sudden absence of the warmth of him felt worse than it should. you were friends. just friends.

right?

sharp laughter at the table next to you shocked you back into the moment and you looked at him, really looked. the tension running across his shoulders, the grip on his cane, the way his jaw was clenched so hard it had to hurt. they all added up.

"matt are you in love with me?" your eyes dropped back down and you followed the designs in the carpet your voice barely more than a whisper.

"yes."

"how- um, how long have you been in love with me?" out of your peripherals you saw him sit back down next to you. he sighed and grabbed the long ignored drink in front of him, downing it in one go.

"since the day i met you, i- i'm really sorry. i shouldn't have come, i shouldn't have said that i just-" one peek up from the carpet at him and your world came crashing down.

he was. he was in love with you. matt murdock, your best friend, was in love with you.

he sat as still as a statue, ready for whatever cosmic punishment was going to befall him for this. for fucking up one of the most important friendships in his life, how could he have fucked this one up so bad. his fingers sat on top of his thighs, tapping nervously as he waited for you to respond. if you responded.

it felt like hours to him, but just the barest of seconds for you. your brain finally caught up, and you surged forward crashing your mouth into his. your hands immediately flew to grip in his hair, needing something, anything to ground you to this moment.

to kissing your best friend. to him kissing you back.

his brain shut down and rebooted and when he came back he had one hand cupping your face, the other tightly wound in the fabric of your dress at your side almost pulling you out of your seat to bring you as close as possible.

"i'm in love wi-" you spoke, pulling away but he shook his head just slightly and immediately pulled you back in.

"sh, just kiss me."

#matt murdock #matt murdock x reader #matt murdock x you #matt murdock fic #matt murdock fluff #daredevil #daredevil x reader #daredevil x you #daredevil fic #ezra answers #ezra writes

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beccalendsahand · 2 years

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Takarazuka End of Year Tag (part 2)

Part 1

Questions

So I did actually do this right at the end of the year but then I wanted to add pictures but was too tired so thought "I'll do it tomorrow it's fine" and now its 3 weeks into January! Anyway, enjoy!

8. My Everlasting Dream: What show have you rewatched the most this year?

This has definitely been a year of rewatches for me but I think by far the show I've rewatched the most is "Nice Work If You Can Get It" that show just means so much to me. It helped me get through some really tough times, whenever I was feeling down I would put on a clip (or rewatch it in full if I had the time) and it would make me feel instantly better. It was also the first full zuka musical that I subtitled! The show has no script so I rewatched scenes over and over to catch any words I missed, I think I know the entirety of that show off by heart now! XD

9. Fascinating Rhythm: What zuka song has been stuck in your head all year?

Oh now this is a hard one! It's definitely between Silk Road, Cool Beast and Le Poison... But I think Cool Beast has been the most consistently stuck in my head. The lyrics are so stupid but the song is so catchy I can't help it!

"Cool Beasttttt!! Cool Beastttt!! gyao! gyao! gyao! GYAO!"

10. Diamonds are a Girls Best Friend: What was your favourite costume(s) of the year?

So I think whoever designed the costumes for Genroku/The Fascination should get an award, they are so so so beautiful. I love the mix of old and new, east meets west, and the sprinkling of Harajuku kimono street fashion that went into the Genroku costumes, I'm so jealous of all the people who will be able to see all these costumes on display in the next GT. Also, the fascination costumes are so ridiculously gorgeous? Like I swear there's a rule where there always has to be at least one bad costume in a takarazuka revue, but not this time! I can't get over the pink outfits at the start especially! The shade of pink? And the fabric? AH!!

Also, I wanna give a big shoutout to Hana's duedan dress for Nice Work. I haven't been able to stop thinking about it all year, I want that dress!

11. Cool Beast!!: what was the most ridiculous costume(s) your saw this year

This one was hard as I think everyone's already answered with all the best ones so I'm gonna do something a little different and I'm gonna say, the return of Chigi's Esmeralda outfit for Cool Beast. Why? Because not only is it the most bizarre outfit but also because I actually LIKED IT this time??? WHAT! I dunno if Rei can just pull off anything or if it's because maybe the outfit suited the scene more this time around, but yeah it's hideous and I love it.

12. Greatest Moment: A special moment on stage that stayed with you

How can I not answer this with the "I'm proud of you my wife" and "It's a bit embarrassing maybe I should tell you when we are in the dressing room but... YUZUKA SAN AISHITEIMASU"? Actually, you know what? The whole reihana part of the sayonara show was just so special. Reihana on stage together just the two of them is so magical, I've never seen an on-stage couple like them, ahhh it was a beautiful moment.

And finally, the big ones:

13. Musical: What was your favourite musical (one act or two act) of the year?

No competition, who am I kidding it's "Nice Work If You Can Get It". This show is actually perfect? I can't stress enough how good it is. The casting is spot-on, everyone is cast so well and everyone is a highlight of the show. As said above it has a place in my heart for many reasons. I think due to the current situation we really just needed a show that was pure joy that could transport us to another world, and Nice Work definitely achieved that. I think this show is Rei's best work, Haikara-san is of course a favourite but that was very much Hana's show. I think in Nice Work we really get to see Rei take centre stage and show people all her best bits, the dance numbers are spectacular and the songs suit her vocals beautifully, you could see her blossoming with confidence, she was totally in her element. We also got to see stars in the making with Oto Kurisu and Hiryuu Tsukasa once again getting main parts! It's really exciting to see them working the ladder, and getting to see them play love interests was fun! This show is also one of those interesting examples of when Takarazuka improves on its source material. Jimmy is 100 times more likeable in the takarazuka version, in part due to Rei's charm but also in the changes to dialogue. Jimmy falls for Billie straight away whereas in the broadway version we are left puzzled right up till the end about his real feelings for her. Billie too has changes in her character. The Nice Work zuka version is not constrained by the original juke box musical format because of the freedom of translation. Rather than translate the lyrics literally, Harada Ryo adds plot points into the songs as if it were a normal musical. For example "I've gotta be there" is now "It's all okay" and includes lyrics that mention Eileen being in the bath for too long and Jimmy explaining to the audience his conundrum. In Billie's case the song "Someone to watch over me" is changed in such a way that Billie is no longer a girl desperate to find love but instead someone desperate to find freedom and her anxieties about falling in love. For example, the final lyrics are changed from: "Won't you tell him please to put on some speed, follow my lead, oh how I need, someone to watch over me, someone to watch over me" to "My heart will travel on the wind, and I'll spread my wings and fly far from here, into the shining sky, into the shining sky" This change makes Billie a lot more three dimensional and lets us understand her feelings so much more than the original. It also means Billie's dilemma at the end makes much more sense. We know why she thinks she has to choose between Jimmy and her job because she believes love gets in the way of freedom.

Anyway, this is starting to turn into an essay, so let's move on!

14. Revue: What was your favourite revue of the year? There as so many good ones! It's so hard to choose! Originally I was considering either Silk Road or Cool Beast, but then The Fascination happened and I have already rewatched that one a ridiculous amount of times. I think though I'm gonna go with a non-hanagumi thing for once and say Silk Road! Silk Road and also its preceding play "Forississimo" really did blow my mind, I remember just having my jaw dropped the entire show. They were both so dynamic and unique and omg I just loved them both so much (actually I would just like to say Fortississimo is my favourite zuka original play of the year). What I liked about Silk Road was how I think it really felt like the evolution of the revue in a post-Baddy world. (sorry I'm about to go all essay on yall again) I remember reading lots of revues of Ueda Kumiko's 2018 classic, Baddy. Many people said that it was a historic moment in takarazuka and that it was clever and exciting and modern. But there were also those critics who believed that the show had too much plot and specifically dialogue to really be classed as a revue and that due to its complex message and plot would have worked much better with the extra time that a one-act play would have given it. Silk Road tackles these points brilliantly. The show manages to give us a plot that is simple enough to follow even with only a couple of lines of dialogue every few scenes, heck even with no japanese skills at all the viewer can grasp it with just the short synopsis on the website. It also has grand costumes and sets that I've never seen to such an extent in a revue, and most importantly for me, it has some of the best top musumeyaku rights I've seen. Maaya Kiho is finally treated like the queen she is and I love it so much. The Shanghai scene where she raps and does that high note? Amazing! We love to see it! When she makes her entrance in the opening number like Gilda in Wicked? Incredible! It was also just a fantastic sayonara show for Nozomi and Maaya ahhh I just loved it!

There are of course some issues to consider about the orientalism in this piece, for the most part this is simply an aesthetic choice but I think I speak for most people when I say that the harem scene was not needed and felt in poor taste. But this is part of a much bigger debate about Takarazuka fantasy aesthetics and how it has been interwoven with occidentalism and orientalism throughout takarazuka history, which I don't have the time to go into here nor am I the person most qualified to talk about that. But best to bear that in mind when watching it for the first time!

And there we are! Finally finished the tag! Did you have similar answers to me or did we have different preferences? I'm excited to see what this next year holds!

#endofyeartakarazukatag #end of year takarazuka tag #end of year takarazuka tag part 2 #cool beast #silk road #nice work if you can get it #takarazuka #blahblog #becca blogs

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gunsatthaphan · 3 years

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Recently I have been rewatching Fighting Mr N•2 and I realised how far we got with BL. Honestly the acting of Sam and Yu is impeccable and the drama looks professional. I remember when I started BL, it was mainly Thai BL and China didn’t ban same sex depictions yet but it was just a few drama but the quality was so different. The actors were for most of the time undergraduates students who took the roles for recognition or just for a stepping stone for the « real acting career » aka straight roles. The acting was bad, there was almost no chemistry between the characters and the story were really all the same.

Even if we have a long way to go, what do you think can help BL to be taken seriously and be in the same category of regular drama ?

hi there anon!

you're right, at this point there are a good number of decent shows out there and generally I would say there is/has been a change in quality; especially compared to 5 years ago or so. Not just in terms of production quality but also the types of stories have shifted I think. But if you look at the bigger picture, those still dont outnumber the bad ones lol.

And I’m not gonna lie, I always find these asks super hard to answer. Criticizing these shows/the genre on a level that doesn’t make me sound like a hypocrite is difficult lol. Because I do love watching them it’s just..... there’s a lot of junk out there. And I don’t want people to misunderstand me. So I will try my best...

When you imply that these shows are not taken seriously then you’re right. As I said from my perception it has been going into a better direction but I think the problem is the distinction. Because while more “forward” shows like we best love or lovely writer/ciwyw/etc. exist and no matter how many more groundbreaking bls there are still to come,,,,, they're still bls lol. It still exists as a separate genre and I don't think that's gonna change anytime soon. Which is fine but sometimes I think the gap between bl and non-bl is too big. I don't know if I can word this right but I think a lot bls are setting themselves apart too much by creating too much of a delusional and unrealistic world. Everyone is gay, girls don't exist (and if they do they’re evil creatures with no personality), the word sexuality is nonexistent and everyone is in love with everyone etc.... Which, if it's done right, is not bad and can be fun to watch but sometimes it feels more like a feverdream than a realistic story that people can relate to. If that makes sense. And I think that’s a bit different with “classic” dramas. (no matter from what country)

So I think realism is one thing a lot of shows need to work on. And I don’t just mean the setup but also the acting, which is often way too stiff and just takes away all the fun lol. Another thing is the promotion. Idk about you but imo the marketing for these shows is getting out of hand. All the merch and music videos and fan events and tiktoks are extremely annoying and do nothing besides emphasize that all of it is for money and nothing else. Which is a problem. At least in my opinion. And I think that adds to the whole thing of bls being derided a bit.

And I know people keep pleading for the term "bl" to be removed and I agree - but I think that's unrealistic. Rather I think these shows should aim for more realism, less repetitive tropes and more original stories. Also a more moderate representation in the media.

But also as I said that's just my opinion. I know a lot of people love their classic sappy bls and back when I started to watch, so did I. It was a new world and I was fascinated dsjfkd. But after almost 4 years I'm starting to get tired lol. I've stopped settling for less than what I really love to watch and it feels good lol. And while you're right when you say we have a long way to go and while we probably will never quite get rid of the term "bl", I think there's a chance that shows like we best love, light on me or manner of death, etc. could become the norm 🤞🏻

xxx

#bl dramas #discussions #opinions #sorry this got long

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kexing · 2 years

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Helloo, so I finally managed to watch the new not me episode after a day of procrastinating and wow there's so much to unpack, this show is truly a gem and I can tell it's only gonna get better. Totally supportive of how yok was just absolutely smitten by vandalism guy after seeing him for like 2 seconds. I'm also loving all the theories behind sean having a crush on black and being jealous of gram, but personally I think he might've teared up because black said he quit, like think about it, none of the guys even thought of exposing the corrupt government officials until black ignites a fire in them and like sean says himself, he gave them hope and isn't gonna be there anymore to see it through, it definitely would make me cry, but again, that's just me. Anyways, what's your thoughts about this ep? I feel like I'll need to give both ep's another good watch because I might've missed plenty of things due to the excitement lol.

Also, can't wait for bb this friday, I need to know if I was even remotely close with my "in-depth analysis" of wai's shitty behavior. We're in for a ride with these last few episodes I think, but it'll be well worth it!

- anti-wai anon :)

hi awa!!! so glad you’re back!! and that you watched the new not me episode 🥰🥰🥰

ahhh yes! that’s the same feeling i have, that not me is a Gem™️ that is only going to get better. genuinely hope we’re right!!! 🙏🏼🕯🙏🏼🕯🙏🏼🕯

me too!!! in this house we 1000% support yok’s random crush and more than that, we absolutely ship him and dan. they’re gonna be a legendary side couple, i can feel it!!!!

i even saw a meme that was like:

me watching wai falling in love at first sight with pa: unrealistic! ridiculous!

me watching yok falling in love at first sight with half of dan’s face: THAT’S TRUE LOVE OKAY!!!!

yep. that’s me! no shame here!

and nope! that’s not just you, i also believe sean cried because “black” quit. i mean, do i think there was jealousy in there when he saw gram taking care of “black”? yes, absolutely. but that was just an extra stabbing to his already bleeding heart.

sean is clearly passionate about the cause, he excitedly asked the girl if she thought that the people who burned down tawi’s house were heroes, he thinks that what they did was right. and this all happened because black started it and then suddenly “he” wants to quit? like none of what they believe and did matter? that must have felt like pure betrayal. and yeah, that shit hurt him a lot!

rewatching is always a good idea!! i rewatched both episodes just hours after watching them for the first time lol just in case i missed anything but i’m still very much confused about everything and that’s fine! i want them to tell me anyways, instead of theorizing like crazy 🤣

i LOVED the episode. genuinely got me obsessed with those stunning shots, it’s like the director has a very specific vision and they do it so well??? amazing music, cinematography on point, gun making it look like acting is as easy as walking down the park, off really is surprising me, his acting has improved and the depth he’s bringing to sean with that underlying warmth he so desperately tries to hide from “black” DRIVES ME INSANE. i never thought i’d have sean feels and yet here i am!! i loved all the discussions, the pacing was much better than the first episode imo, am ready for the side couple, and have i mentioned how great the music is in this show? so yeah.

i like it so much i started editing again and plan to follow through until the end which is not easy because i’m not a good editor, i just struggle until i eventually quit lmao but BOY THIS SHOW!!!!! just makes me want to edit it at all costs.

and about bb. i both desperately need and desperately fear next ep lmaoooo idk i have this Feeling inside my chest that i can’t name but it’s not really good. i’m praying it’s just anxiety talking.

i do believe your wai analysis is at least 50% correct, if not a lot more lmaooo which has me nervous as well but it’s pointless. gotta just face how it is. i know we’ll get a happy ending anyways!

yep!!!! these last four episodes are going to be insane in one way or another but so so so worth it. i have zero doubts about that!!

so let’s stay strong and go through the storm because a beautiful sunrise is waiting for us on the other side ❤️💙

#awa tag #you have a tag now babe #mj got mail!

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goldenmaybank · 4 years

Text

meant to be

(not my gif)

pairing: jj maybank x reader

summary: y/n has been in love with her best friend, jj maybank, for years and now has to watch him fall in love with another girl, who is a kook.

warnings: swearing and slight angst (?)

word count: 4k (it’s a long one)

a/n: hi! this is my first imagine and i hope you like it. i know it’s a long one i just got carried away :)

2 years. 730 days. 17520 hours. 1051200 minutes.

that's how long i've had to watch the guy i'm in love with be with another girl. two long years of seeing them kiss, hold hands, cuddle, go on dates and anniversaries. all because i was too scared to tell my best friend that i loved him.

two years ago

" yo, y/n ! y/n ! guess what just happened." my best friend since we were kids, jj, said as he ran up to me.

"what?"

"you remember that girl, shay, that i was telling you about? that kook that i met at the kegger last weekend with the long blonde hair, green eyes, slim waist, and fat as-"

"yes, yes. jj i remember." i said cutting him off from finishing his sentence.

"so, i just asked her out and guess what? she said yes!" he said with the biggest smile on his face.

"okay."

"okay? that's all i get? an okay? y/n, this is the hottest kook i’ve ever seen that we're talking about here."

"yeah and last week kate was the hottest kook and the week before that was penelope. this is nothing new j. it's just another pretty girl with big boobs and a nice ass that you'll mess around with for a few weeks maybe even days and then move onto the next girl."

"no y/n, this time is different. it feels different."

"mhm sure" i say not convinced

this is what jj does. he meets a cute kook girl or touron at one our parties, they hook up for a few days or weeks, and he moves onto to the next one. this was no different. however, in that moment, i didn't realize how serious he really was about her until it was too late.

few months after

jj and i were laying on john b’s couch watching movies like we always do every friday night. we've been doing this since we were little kids, usually the rest of the pogues would join us, but they’re all busy tonight. john b is with sarah, kie is working, and pope is helping out his dad. so that just leaves me and jj together.

"um, y/n?"

"hm?" i asked in response

"would you mind if i ended our movie night a little bit early?"

"why?"

"because shay just got off work early tonight and wants to hang out. she's been really busy lately, so we haven't gotten the chance to hang out as much. would you be okay if i left to go see her?”

"um, sure. i guess i can just rewatch friday the 13th again without you."

"really? you're the best! thanks." he said jumping up excitedly to put on his shoes and grab his hoodie, " i mean it's not like we haven't watched this a thousand times already, you'll be fine without me."

"i kinda wanted you here, but i guess she's more important" i mumbled under my breath

"huh?"

"n-nothing. uh, j can i ask you something before you go?"

"yeah sure, but it can't take too long shay is waiting for me."

"are you serious about her? like really serious?"

"yeah, i guess i am. i don't know i've never really felt this way about a girl before. she just makes me feel so happy and i always want to be around her and spend time with her. i usually just get bored with girls after a while and break up with them, but it's different with her. it's something about her i can't explain it." he said with admiration in his eyes.

that's when i knew it was too late. i could see the way his eyes lit up when i mentioned her and how he talked about her with such admiration. he was head over heels for this girl and who am i to step in and ruin it by telling him my feelings. he wouldn't reciprocate those feelings anyways she's the only girl he's felt like this about. i never had a chance against her. i will never be her.

after that day i didn’t see jj for three weeks. he cancelled every single one our plans because of her. “i cant go surfing today, shay wants to go get lunch” “can’t go fishing, shay needs me” “cant make it to the boneyard tonight, shay wants to have a movie night” he bailed on us, on me, all week because of her. the kook girl he just met a few months ago.

finally, after countless begging and excuses jj came to hang out with us at john b’s house. we were all laying on the hammocks outside watching the sunset and for a minute it felt like everything was how it used to be even though i knew it wasn't. you could feel that everything was different especially between me and jj. he wasn't his usual flirty, touchy self with me and the tension in the air was thick. the rest of the pogues tried to act like everything was normal, but we all knew after today it would be another few weeks before we saw jj again. all he did was hang out with shay and he barely had any time for us anymore.

“so, jj since when did you start dating kooks?” john b snickered as jj punched his arm

“since when did you start dating at all?” pope replied

“i don’t know, man. it’s just different with her, i guess. i never thought i could be capable enough to have a relationship, but she changed that. she changed me.”

kie looks at me with sympathy in her eyes. she was the only one who knew about my love for jj. i spent so many nights crying to her about my feelings for him and how i wish things could be different between us. it took a lot to get jj to open up to me, especially about his dad, and i always wanted to be the one he could go to for anything. i was the one who patched him up after a fight with rafe, i was the one who hugged him as he cried to me about his dad, i was the one who went along with his crazy ideas, i was one who did everything i could to get him to love me the way i love him. but i guess things don’t work out the way you want them to. i give kie and a nod and smile letting her know i’m okay. as long as jj is happy that’s all that matters to me. i would do anything to make him happy, even if it means i have to watch him fall in love with another girl.

present

6 years. 2190 days. 52560 hours. 3153600 minutes.

that's how long the love of my life has been with his girlfriend. six long years of me trying to get over him and find someone else yet i could never get that boy with blonde hair and blue eyes out of my mind. he followed me everywhere i went even when i wasn't with him. he's everything i want in a guy yet i can't have him because he's not mine to have. he's someone else's and now i definitely can't do anything about it because they're getting married today.

today is their wedding and of course they invited me and the rest of the pogues. i debated even going and just letting kie give them my present with my pathetic excuse for why i wasn't there, but after talking to jj about the wedding the other day i couldn’t not go. "i could never have my wedding without you there, y/n. you're one of the most important people in my life." is what he told me. if i was strong i wouldn't care and still not go, but i'm not. all i had to do was look in his eyes when he told me that and i was puddy in his hands. there's no way i can't go and let him down like that. he means way too much to me to hurt him just to spare my own feelings.

i walked into the venue looking around at the setup. of course the kook princess wanted a fairy-tale wedding. i sigh as i look at all the expensive decorations everywhere. i always imagined what my wedding with jj would be like. definitely wouldn’t look anything like this. even after years of all my hard work and schooling i still could never afford something like this. i always thought we’d have our ceremony by the beach since that’s where we first met when we were little kids and spent all our time together. it became our little safe space to get away from everyone and all our problems, and just be together. just me and jj.

“gotta admit it looks beautiful.” pope says as kie hits his shoulder

“it’s okay, kie. he’s right, it is beautiful. more than i could've ever given him.”

“hey” kie says as she grabs my hand, “you sure you’re okay? because we can leave right now. trust me, i really don’t care to see the little princess wearing a dress that costs ten times the amount of my house.”

“it’s fine, kie. we have to be here for him. i’m just gonna go talk to jj quickly.”

“okay, i’ll save a seat for you.”

i went towards the back to find where jj is, so i could give him something before the ceremony started.

"knock knock." i say as i opened the door to jj’s room walking in to see him finishing getting ready.

"hey you. i almost thought you weren't gonna come."

"now why would i miss my best friend getting married to the girl of his dreams? i would never miss this no matter what"

"good because i know i would never be able to do this without you here."

"so.." i say as i sit down next to him, "how does it feel to finally be getting married?”

"it feels unreal. i never thought this day would come. and if it did, i honestly thought you would be the one standing at the end of the aisle"

"yeah, so did i" i say as i laugh weakly.

"i remember we had this whole thing planned out as kids. we were gonna get married on the beach, preferably the bahamas, but you know any beach would’ve worked for us.

"and we were gonna have this huge reception and have our friends give sappy speeches talking about how we've been friends forever and despite the “no pogue on pogue macking” rule we still ended up together and got married." i added.

"and our honeymoon was gonna be in mykonos. we were gonna get a suite with a pool and relax all day and then turn up at night at the clubs there." he said as we both laughed.

"wow. we had a lot of plans when we were younger."

"we really did, but i guess none of them really worked out huh?"

"i guess not"

we sat in silence for a moment thoughts both roaming our minds about how we ended up here. best friends since we were little, spent all our time together, always acted like a couple, and yet here we are sitting in this room minutes before he gets married to a girl who isn't me, a kook nonetheless. it's now or never. do i let him know how i feel and finally have this weight lifted off my shoulders or just keep it to myself and let them be happy?

"uh, j? i- um, wrote this letter for you" i say as i take an envelope out of my purse, "it was the original speech that i wanted to tell you at the reception later but felt as though it wouldn't have been right to say, so i just wrote it for you to see. just, don't open it in front of shay, please."

"why can't you just tell me what's in the letter in your speech later?"

"because i would be a shit person if i say what's in that letter at your wedding reception in front of everyone."

"what's in the letter that's so bad?" he asked confusingly

"j-just read it when you're alone, okay?"

"no"

"no?"

"no. just tell me now what's in the letter."

"jj, i-i can't."

"yes you can. what's so bad that you can't tell me now?"

"i don't want to overstep my boundaries or ruin anything or make anything awkward, so just read it later when you're alone."

"no, y/n. tell me right now."

"jj, your wedding starts in a few minutes you need to finish getting ready. we don't have time for this."

"yes we do. i always have time for you."

"jj-"

"no. i'm not leaving this room until you tell me."

"j, don't be difficult."

"i'm not being difficult just read me the letter and this will all be done with"

i sighed, "oh my god fine. i'll read you the damn thing." i take a deep breath and begin to read the letter that might just change everything between us.

"dear jj, i'm not sure when exactly you'll be reading this, but i know when you do you'll be happily married to shay. so, congratulations best friend you're finally someone's husband. i honestly never thought this day would come; you were never one for relationships. always thought it was too much work to handle and you already had enough shit to deal with in your life. remember when we were little we made a promise that if neither of us were in a relationship by the time we were 30 we would get married. as silly as it was i always thought that would happen. that we would be the ones getting married and have our best friends write a speech for us. i'd always imagine kie writing mine and john b and pope would write yours, mainly pope though because we all know he’s way better with words than any of us ever were. but i never once in a million years would think i would be writing one for you and another girl. we've been through so many ups and downs and we still stuck together through it all. you're my best friend and i love you. words can't even describe how much i love you. jj, you've brought me so much happiness and never fail to put a smile on my face. even during my worst times you were always there to pick up the pieces and make me laugh. i never thought i would have someone in my life who means so much to me as much as you do. being around you immediately makes my day a hundred times better and i don't know what i would do without you in my life. my life would've probably been extremely boring and plain without you and your crazy adventures. your smile can make anyone's day better and you always make sure everyone else is happy even before yourself. and that's one of the many reasons why i'm in love with you. yes, i'm in love with you and have been for a while. this is more than a just as friends thing. i'm completely and utterly in love with you and that's never gonna change. and i know it took you a while to believe that someone could truly love and care for you, but i always have and always will. you so deserve so much than life has given you and i hope you know how amazing you really are. i’ve become such a better person because of you and you make me so incredibly happy. i'll never be able to repay you for everything you've done for me. i love you so much. i hope you're happy in your marriage and she treats you right, which i know she does. all i ever wanted was for you to be happy even if it wasn't with me. even though i just dropped this huge bomb on you, please don't let this affect our friendship. i will always be here for you no matter what. i love you, jj maybank."

there was complete silence. jj just sat there staring at the wall not saying a word.

"see this is exactly why i didn't want to tell you in person because i knew this would happen. i-"

"you love me?"

"yes, j i do."

"like actually love me?"

i sighed, "yes and i have for a while as i said in the letter"

"w-why didn't you tell me?"

"i don't know i was always so scared to and i thought you would never really find someone, so i had nothing to lose by not telling you. and then you started dating shay and i could tell you were really happy with her and by the time i realized you two were serious it was too late. i didn't want to step in and ruin anything or lose our friendship."

"you wouldn't have."

"what?"

"you wouldn't have ruined our friendship because i felt the same way. i still feel the same way." jj admitted

"you, what?"

"i love you y/n and as more than just friends. i have since freshmen year of high school when i first told you about my dad and you cleaned up all my cuts and held me in your arms all night. but i was just always too scared to say anything because i thought you were out of my league and i never really deserved you. the only reason i was with all those girls was to forget about you and get rid of my feelings for you, but they never did go away."

"i guess we're both stupid then. we always had these feelings for each other and just never said it."

"i guess so."

"so, what does this mean for us?"

"what do you mean?" jj asked

"i mean this obviously changes things, so what are we gonna do?"

"i don't see why things have to change. yeah we admitted we have these feelings, but that doesn't change anything."

"you're getting married, jj. in like twenty minutes there's gonna be another girl waiting at the end of that aisle for you to go there and give yourself completely to her. and i don't want to stand in the way of giving you and her that happiness you both deserve. me still being here is gonna change things because things are different now whether you want to believe it or not. these feelings are out there and they're still relevant. and i'm not gonna sit here and watch you two be happy and in love and be on the sidelines and feel like shit. i don't deserve that. i don't deserve to have my heart broken seeing you together knowing you have feelings for me and yet i can't do a damn thing about it. and it's not fair to her either to have another woman who you have feelings for sit there and get in the way of her happiness. i'm not gonna ruin this for her, jj. i won't. shay has been nothing but sweet to me and i'm not gonna do that to her. she doesn't deserve it and neither do i."

"so what do you want me to do then?"

"i want you to let me go."

"what? y/n, i love you. you can't tell me to do that"

"let me go, jj. as long as you sit here and tell me that you love me and have feelings for me, this will never end. and we will be going around in circles and i've been stepping on eggshells long enough for you and i'm done. you love her and she loves you, so be happy with her."

"but i love you too y/n and that's never gonna stop." he says with tears in his eyes.

"i know and i will always love you too, but i can't keep doing this. i can't watch you be with her and not be able to do anything. i can't be able to be alone with you knowing how you feel and not do anything to you. you don't know how badly i've just been wanting to kiss you after hearing you say those words to me. you don't know how bad i want this, but jj i can't do this" i say tears running down my face.

"i'll end it then. i'll cancel the wedding and we can be together."

"no. no, jj you can't do that. i'm not gonna ruin this. you've been with her for six years already, you've created this beautiful relationship and commitment to each other and i'm not just gonna ruin that. she's doesn't deserve that. you just need to let me go, jj. let me get over you because the more i'm around you the more the feelings grow. just let me find happiness within someone else.”

"so what? we're just gonna end our friendship? our years and years of friendship is over just like that? i don't want to lose you. if i cant have you in that way, even though i want to so badly, i still want you in my life as a friend."

"but i can't jj. i can't be around you. please, just let me go. let me get over you and find someone else. maybe one day if it's meant to be we'll find our way back to each other and maybe things can work out differently but for now just let me go." i say as my voice breaks

he sighed, "fine, i'll let you go, but only if you do one thing for me."

"what is it?"

"kiss me."

"w-what?"

"kiss me. i've been waiting years to tell you how i feel about you and finally be able to hold you and kiss you, so please just let me do it."

"jj, i don't know" i say hesitantly

"shay never has to know about this and once we kiss it's over. i'll let you go."

"if i kiss you, you'll let me go?"

"yes."

i sighed looking at jj. i actually got a good look of him right now in this moment. he looks so broken. dried tears streamed down his face, his eyes are puffy, and nose is red, but yet he still looks beautiful. no words can describe how jj looks. "cute" or "hot" never did this man justice. he was beautiful both inside and out and that's why i fell in love with him years ago. and as i started to lean it looking in his eyes all the memories we've made together came flashing through my mind all at once. this is really it. after this i'm actually leaving my best friend, who's the love of my life, to move on with my life.

moments later i felt his soft pink lips mold against mine. our lips moved in sync in such a way i have never felt with anyone else before. there was something about the way his lips moved against mine in such a passionate and loving way that i've never felt before. my stomach was immediately filled with butterflies and my mind went blank. all i could do was be in this moment with him. a few moments later it ended leaving both of us breathless. we stared at each other in awe not knowing a simple goodbye kiss would make us feel this way.

"wow. i've been waiting for this kiss for so long and i never knew it would feel like that." jj said

"neither did i.”

as much as i didn't want to, i knew what had to be done next. i stood up grabbing my bag and walked towards the door.

"so this is really it? you're just leaving now. after what we just felt in that kiss you're still gonna leave?" jj asked

"you know i have to."

"no, you don't have to. you want to, there's a difference. but it’s fine you’re just gonna leave just everyone else does, huh?”

don't turn back now. i know what he’s trying to do. he knows how the last thing i ever wanted to do was leave him like countless of other people in his life have done. but don’t let his words get to you. don't turn back now. the decision is already made. if i go back now i'll never leave and end up in the same cycle again.

i turn around one last time to look at my best friend, "i'm sorry. goodbye, jj."

that was the last time i saw jj.

after that i left the venue without saying anything to anyone. i got a ton of calls from kie, pope, and john b asking me where i was. i know they all eventually found out how i felt about him, which sometimes makes me wonder how he never knew, but then again i'm pretty sure they knew he had feelings for me too and i still never noticed. it's crazy how that happens. you could spend every moment of every day with someone and still be so oblivious to how they really feel about you. i guess i was just so caught up in my feelings for him i never noticed all the signs he showed of liking me back.

they always say what’s meant to be will be no matter how long it takes whether it's a day, a month, or a year. well i never really believed in that until now. years later after i walked out of that room, now stood face to face with the guy who was and still is my everything.

532 notes · View notes

karlajoyner · 3 years

Text

Karaoke Night (Booboo Stewart x Reader)

A/n: So I hope you guys like it! I'm currently working on the rest of my requests. I'm probably gonna hold off on the sunset curve one cause I don't know if I'm gonna make that a smut yet. Also I do have a JATP groupchat for 18+ and a tumblr taglist so comment if you wanna be added to any of those!

Requested by: Perksofbeingjune34 (Wattpad)

Warnings: Drinking

————

I set Jadahs makeup in place smiling at her reaction.

"Thanks y/n! I look great" She grinned.

"I'm so ready for tonight"

"Me too Jadah. We should get going before we miss getting a ride"

"I'm sure Booboo will wait for you" She teased knowing about my small crush on the actor.

"He has to. We're roommates" I stated fixing my eyeliner in the mirror in front of us.

After a long day my uncle Kenny invited the cast and crew to a karaoke night to celebrate none other than the birthday of Jadah Marie who was turning 16. And like any good niece I of course said yes to the invitation being very good friends with the young girl. Fortunately enough, having talent in the makeup department gave me an opportunity to work with uncle Kenny on a lot of amazing projects. Including his current one. Julie and the Phantoms.

I had worked with some of the cast previously including Jadah herself, Cheyenne Jackson, and of course my best friend and roommate Booboo Stewart. Who I had met on the set of the very first Descendants. We've been close ever since. Even renting an apartment together in LA and of course begging my uncle to pair us as roommates here in Vancouver.

I sighed running to the back of the trailer pulling out my gift for Jadah, handing it to the girl.

"Here open it when you get the chance. But we should really get going" I said taking off my jacket showing off the nice dress I had put on for tonight.

"Thanks. You look great. I'm sure you'll catch someone's attention tonight" She spoke wiggling her eyebrows.

"Jadah I did not tell you about my crush for you to tease me all the time. I told you so you could stop accusing me of it"

I playfully rolled my eyes, shutting the door behind us.

"Crush on who?" A familiar voice asked from behind us making my eyes go wide.

"Booboo what are you doing here?" I asked taking in the boys appearance.

A nice navy blue suit paired with a pair of white shoes. His sleeves rolled up to his elbows and white button down opened just enough to show off the gold friendship necklace I got him for his own birthday.

"I waited for you. I promised everyone I'd get you two to Karaoke in one piece. Now answer my question. You have a crush on who?"

"Harry Styles" I replied.

The young girl clearly stifling a laugh from beside me.

"Oh" He replied with a frown.

"Well that's nothing new. We should get going. Don't want the birthday girl to be late" He smiled at Jadah as we made our way towards the parking lot.

The ride to the restaurant wasn't a complete loss. Jadah making the tension in the air float away. Starting off by playing I spy to telling stupid jokes causing laughter to fill the air.

"Okay we're here" Booboo stated as we pulled up to the front of the restaurant. I thanked the valet who opened my door waiting for Jadah and Booboo.

The two each took one side of me as we walked towards the karaoke bar. Immediately spotting the table that was making noise. I giggled as Owen waved us over crazily.

The hostess immediately walking us over.

"Jadah! Y/n!" Madison shouted getting up to hug us.

I smiled sliding into the booth in between Savannah and Booboo.

"You look beautiful sweetheart"

"Thanks uncle Kenny. This place is fancy"

"This place has drinks" Charlie stated holding up a menu"

"Hallelujah to being 21" I announced taking a menu.

"You want something?" I asked the boy beside me.

"Can't I'm driving"

"Right. Ones of us has be responsible"

"And sober enough to carry the other one to her bedroom so she doesn't trip over her own two feet" He teased bumping my shoulder.

"It was one time"

"It was twice actually" Booboo corrected me making me playfully roll my eyes.

"Did I mention you look beautiful by the way?" He spoke getting closer to me.

"Uh no. Thank you though" I shyly smiled looking over the menu.

"Your very welcome. I'm a lucky guy you know?"

"And why is that?"

"Because I'm going home with the prettiest girl here tonight" He whispered in my ear. My cheeks burning brighter than a thousand suns.

"Really? Where is she?" I attempted to joke to calm the blood rushing to my face.

"For your information she's sitting right next to me. You know since were roommates and all"

"Oh right of course" I spoke shaking off the slight tinge in my heart.

The waitress soon made her way over taking down our drinks. I ordered something semi strong knowing I'd need it to get through the night.

I loved the cast. They were amazing really. But they take a lot of energy to keep up with which I don't have on my own. Me or Booboo for that matter which is why instead of going out the two of us enjoyed to stay in and cuddle. Of course having a movie marathon. Usually comedies. Like all close friends do. Right?

"So who's gonna go up first?" Owen asked no one daring to speak up.

"Come on I get a cast full of talented singers and no one wants to sing" My uncle said as yet another person went up on stage.

"Oh can one of you go up there and like serenade me or something" I asked excitedly.

"Booboo your girls talking but I don't see you moving" Savannah said making everyone chuckle.

"Oh Y/n can go!" Madison yelled excitedly.

"No she's can't" I said playing with my fingers.

"Oh you totally could. We don't judge here" Charlie agreed.

"I really can't. I do makeup I don't sing"

"You do you liar. I've heard you when you think you're alone in the makeup trailer. Your amazing"

"I'm not singing Mads"

"Come on it can be my birthday present" Jadah grinned.

"Forget it guys. My own niece hasn't even let me hear her sing" My uncle spoke making me roll my eyes.

"I'm not doing it. There's no way"

"Come on y/n/n" Booboo finally spoke placing a hand on my arm.

I looked up at the man in front of me and back at his hand. He quickly moved it away sending me his signature smile.

"You know you have it in you"

"Let's get her drunk!" Charlie yelled raising his arms in the air making us all laugh.

"Charlie might actually be on the right track" I chuckled.

"I'll get the shots" Booboo spoke slipping out of the booth.

I took my 4th shot beginning to feel the liquid courage take over me.

"Are you drunk enough yet? Owen asked. I giggled nodding my head watching my uncle nod his head in disapproval.

"I brought you guys here to celebrate poor Jadah's birthday and you repay me by getting my niece drunk" Uncle Kenny spoke making me burst out in laughter.

"Your gonna be so proud of me" I laughed pushing Booboo out of the booth and standing up.

I made my way towards the stage with the help of Savannah. Watching as she walked towards the dj leaving me alone with the microphone.

I grinned upon hearing the beginning of a familiar song.

Yeah, everybody's got a thing

But some don't know how to handle it

Always reaching out in vain

Just taking the things not worth having

But don't you worry 'bout a thing

Don't you worry 'bout a thing, mama

'Cause I'll be standing on the side

When you check it out, oh

I sang watching the reaction of the table I was previously sat at. They were shocked as they should be. But the tequila in my system couldn't care less.

They say your style of life's a drag

And that you must go other places

Just don't you feel too bad

When you get fooled by smiling faces

Don't you worry 'bout a thing

Don't you worry 'bout a thing, baby

'Cause I'll be standing on the side

When you check it out

When you get it off your trip

Don't you worry 'bout a thing

Don't you worry 'bout a thing, yeah

Come on!

Everybody needs a change

A chance to check out the new

You're the only one to sees

The changes you take yourself through

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

Don't you worry 'bout a thing (thing)

Pa-pa-p, pa-pa-pa-pa

Pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa

Pa-pa-p, pa-pa-pa-pa

Pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa

Singing at the top of my lungs. I began to dance. Watching the mood of the place change. Everyone beginning to clap along. My eyes landed on the boy I had been crushing on for a while now.

Don't you worry 'bout a thing

Don't you worry 'bout a thing, mama

'Cause I'll be standing on the side

When you check it out

When you get it off your trip

Don't you worry 'bout a thing

Don't you worry 'bout a thing, mama

'Cause I'll be standing on the side

When you check it out

Oh, don't you worry

Don't you worry 'bout a thing, mama

'Cause I'll be standing, I'll be standing

When you

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,

Don't you worry 'bout a thing

I finished with a bow before making my way back to the table. Taking the shot that sat in front of Charlie.

"Hey!" He yelled.

"That was amazing!" Madison shouted as the whole table began to cheer.

"Thanks guys. It was fun"

"This could be the start of your singing career"

"Thank you but no thank you uncle Kenny. Baby can you get me another shot" I patted Booboos shoulder.

"Did you just call him baby?"

"I meant Booboo" I corrected myself.

"I think you need some rest if your mixing up words" Booboo spoke standing up.

"I-I'm fine" I whispered looking up at him.

"We can rewatch Harry Potter"

"And suddenly I'm ready to go home" I shouted.

"Happy Birthday Jadah" I grinned at the girl.

"Thank you for coming. And my makeup. And my gift. And everything else"

"Your welcome. You deserve it all!" I shouted lifting my arms in the air. Immediately stumbling backwards only to be caught by a pair of arms.

"I'll get her home safely Kenny. Nothing to worry about" He spoke from behind me.

"Thank you. And thanks for coming guys" My uncle spoke as I was led out the place.

"I'm ready for movie night!" I shouted walking out of my bedroom in a pair of sweats and an oversized tee shirt. Booboos shirt to be exact.

"Me too!" He shouted from the kitchen.

"Hogwarts here we come" I spoke sitting down on the couch. Seeing he already had put the disk in.

I watched as he made his way over with a bowl of popcorn at hand.

He placed it on the table laying down on the couch. His head immediately falling onto my lap. I giggled running my fingers through his hair as the opening of the movie started.

We were only 6 minutes in before I glanced down at my lap. There he laid looking so peaceful. So adorable.

I sighed watching as his gaze moved towards me.

The sound of the movie that once filled the room now silent.

"Okay what's up?" He questioned sitting up.

"C-can I sing you something?"

"Like now?"

"Yeah it's a song I wrote"

"You write?"

"Every once in a while. So can I?"

"Of course"

I grinned running to my room pulling out the acoustic guitar inside my closet.

I rushed back outside sitting beside him once more. Biting my lip I began to strum away at the chords.

Your love is bright as ever

Even in the shadows

Baby kiss me

Before they turn the lights out

Your heart is glowing

And I'm crashing into you

Baby kiss me

Before they turn the lights out

Baby love me lights out

In the darkest night hour (in the darkest night hour)

I'll search through the crowd (I'll search through the crowd)

Your face is all that I see

I'll give you everything

Baby love me lights out

You can turn my lights out

We don't have forever

Ooh, baby daylight's wasting

You better kiss me

Before our time has run out

Mmm yeah

Nobody sees what we see

They're just hopelessly gazing, oh

Oh, baby take me, me

Before they turn the lights out

Before our time has run out

Baby love me lights out

In the darkest night hour (in the darkest night hour)

I'll search through the crowd (I'll search through the crowd)

Your face is all that I see

I'll give you everything

Baby love me lights out

You can turn my lights out

I love you like XO

You love me like XO

You kill me boy XO

You love me like XO

All that I see

Give me everything

Baby love me lights out

You can turn my lights out

In the darkest night hour (in the darkest night hour)

I'll search through the crowd (I'll search through the crowd)

Your face is all that I see

I'll give you everything

Baby love me lights out

You can turn my lights out

I strung the last chord watching as a small smile played at his lips.

"I-it was about you in case you couldn't tell"

"I was hoping you'd say that" He grinned leaning in.

Our lips met in the middle. Moving together in sync. And for a split second it was like the world had disappeared as his hand moved up to caress my cheek.

I giggled as we pulled away watching his face. His happiness radiate with the same energy as mine.

"I really like you" I admitted feeling that blood rush back to my face from earlier.

"I really like you too y/n/n" He whispered leaning in once more.

————

Up Next: Charlie Gillespie x Reader

Sunset Curve x Reader (Maybe)

Carrie Wilson x Reader

Owen Patrick Joyner x Reader

Charlie Gillespie x Reader

Alex x Male Reader

————

@lolychu @headheartbellarke @bookish0918 @kcd15 @ifilwtmfc @moviesbooksandfandoms @lovesanimals @lavender-writer @kaitieskidmore1

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caranfindel · 5 years

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Recap/review 14.13: “Lebanon”

THEN: They hit me right in the face with gorgeous young 1.01 Dean saying "Dad's on a hunting trip and he hasn't been home in a few days" and beautiful baby 1.01 Sam saying "we've got work to do" and we end with 14.12 and Sam furiously punching his brother and then furiously hugging him and Dean saying "let's go home" and does anything else matter? No.

NOW: We see the reflection of Sam and Dean walking up to a pawn shop, with a nice selection of guitars and sunglasses and that weird monkey that was in Rocky's Bar. The proprietor seems friendly enough. Dean flashes him a wad of hundred dollar bills because they're looking for "the really good stuff." This gains them admittance into a secret back room full of things hunters would be interested in, including a hockey mask (?) and a perfume atomizer full of dragon's breath. They tell the guy they're looking for the skull of a specific woman who was executed during the Salem witch trials, and the fact that he has it basically proves that he killed the friend of theirs who previously owned it. (Also Sam picks up a teddy bear and starts to pull the string to make it speak and the guys warns him not to and this is Dean's role, isn't it, messing with things he shouldn't be messing with? But I don't care because chastized Sam and eye-rolly Dean are precious to me.)

Sam goes through a ledger of the guy's inventory and says he's got a lot of occult objects that they should take with them. (Dean plays with the dragon's breath. Sam ducks and flinches and does the really, Dean? thing with his hands and face. I laugh again.) Dean agrees they should take the stuff home.

Title card!

The Impala zooms past a sign welcoming us to Lebanon, Geographical Center of the USA. Then we find ourselves in front of a movie theater showing Beetlejuice and Hell Hazers (All Saints' Day is coming soon, and I imagine Route 666 can't be far behind), where a group of teenagers is talking about... somebody. "People say they're brothers," a kid in a knit cap says, "but all I know is, I was standing right here, and I heard this bam from the trunk of their car. And then, this like, shallow breathing." I'm pretty sure this is a fake-out, and it will turn out he's talking about someone else, but the Impala pulls up in front of the theater and Knit Cap Kid says "that's them!"

As the Winchesters get out of the car and enter a liquor store (decorated with that Family Business neon sign from Rocky's), Sam is still reading the ledger, which lists things like a hangman's rope, fairy dust, and John Wayne Gacy's cigar box. Well, that's oddly specific! The guy working there greets the "Campbell brothers" and knows their usual order. Oh, wow. I love that they're actually known in Lebanon, and that they're going by Campbell. And we know that actual Lebanon, Kansas is too small to have a movie theater or this much business downtown, but I'm happy to handwave that.

What do you mean, "happy to handwave that?" You're always complaining about the inaccuracies regarding tiny Lebanon having traffic cams and whatnot.

Well, maybe this episode just MAKES ME HAPPY, okay?

Anyway. Sam thinks cataloguing the confiscated items would be a good way to take Dean's mind off "things," but Dean's pretty convinced nothing will ever take his mind off that.

Outside, the teens are asking where the guys even come from, and what about their weird trenchcoat-wearing sidekick, and "that kid with the dumb Bambi look on his face all the time" (!) One girl says that, whatever the deal is with these guys, they do have an awesome car, and no one can argue with that. And the other girl, Max, who seems to smitten with the first girl, gets an idea.

Inside, Sam has discovered something significant in the ledger - the "beyzoo" (no, I know that's not how you spell it), which is one of eight ancient Chinese treasures. A pearl that gives you "what your heart desires." Oooh, getting rid of Michael, maybe? But as the guys are discussing this, Dean sees the Impala drive by the window. Guess Max figured out how to impress that other girl! (BTW, there are couple of COOL old trucks on the street.)

The guys see Knit Cap Kid standing on the sidewalk looking confused, and while Sam tells him the car is dangerous to whoever stole it, Dean looks like he wants to murder someone. And yet the Winchesters are confused when the kid says he doesn't want to die. (Or get locked in the trunk!) He says Max is new and he doesn't know where she lives. Dean raises a fist, but Sam pulls him away.

MURDER. I'D MURDER THEM.

Post office. There's a poster of stamps featuring old cars behind the customer service counter. I'm really getting my old truck fix tonight. Sam comes in with his sweet anxious smile and asks for help finding the girl who washed his car, since he forgot to tip her. Post Office Lady is not amused or helpful, or the least bit swayed by his sweet anxious smile. Then Dean comes in and calls her by name and asks about her grandson and she MELTS and he gets sincere and puts his hand on hers and she does exactly what I would do, which is offer up ANYTHING YOU WANT, ANYTHING AT ALL, WOULD YOU LIKE MY SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER WHILE I'M AT IT? Unfortunately, all she knows is where Max's mother works.

SAM’S FACE.

(Sidebar: Have I mentioned that Sam is wearing that nice blue jacket from the episode where he killed the alpha vampire? I like it. Toss that stupid orange jacket, Sam, and wear this more often. And Dean's wearing the black jacket that I always love.)

At the restaurant where Max's mom works, we learn that she has no idea where her daughter is, because she was supposed to be in school. But the guy working in the kitchen knows February 7 is Skip Day (is it always February 7? what about when that falls on a weekend?) and that she'll probably be at a party at this old house on Route 36. (Yes, I did confirm that Route 36 is just outside of Lebanon. Yes, I did use Mapquest. I'm old school up in here, y'all.)

Party house. The little batch of delinquents has taken all the boxes of occult objects out of the Impala for some reason. Including the evil teddy bear. Luckily, someone announces "pizza's here" before a girl pulls the teddy bear's string. At some point I've got to find out what would happen if you pulled it. Fic it for me, friends! (Also, I just noticed the teddy bear's mouth is SEWN SHUT and that's not creepy AT ALL.) The camera slowly pans to a wooden box, and we watch the lid open to reveal a smoky/dusty ghost hand. With a ruffled sleeve. Uh oh.

Knit Cap Kid runs in to warn the partiers that "those guys" are looking for Max, and he's told to chill. Another teen goes into the bathroom, where the mirror frosts over and then the CREEPIEST CLOWN EVER comes out of it. Seriously, creepier than the clown in Plush, which you wouldn't think was possible.

The Winchesters pull up in yet another antique truck, where Dean greets his car with "Baby, Baby, please tell me you're not hurt." Sam's more concerned about the boxes of dangerous occult objects missing from the back seat. Ghost Kid comes running outside and the girl following him tells the brothers that he saw a clown ghost that tried to kill him. Maybe it's my imagination, or maybe Sam has a flash of crap, a killer clown ghost expression before they run into the house.

Dean announces they're FBI and everyone needs to get out, now. Once the room is cleared, he asks if "anything screams clown to you?" Sam immediately notices John Wayne Gacy's cigar box and guys, I'm ashamed to say I didn't put the two together until now. The killer clown ghost is John Wayne Gacy. And Sam is freaked the fuck out about it. "We should burn that right now," Dean says, in a lovely holding-in-the-freakout way, and Sam rushes to throw it into the fireplace. Then Dean says "I mean, this is like a best worst thing that's ever happened, because you love serial killers, but you hate clowns" and I'm DEAD. (I'm also loving TWO gifts from the Continuity Fairy in once sentence.) The lights start flashing before Sam can get his lighter lit, and then the killer clown ghost shows up and tosses Dean around. Knit Cap Kid and the girls run back inside just in time to watch John Wayne Gacy's ghost go up in flames. So the kids get the "monsters are real" speech and are told to keep it secret.

Back at the bunker, Sam's going through the occult goodies and thinks he found the magic pearl. Dean's ready to use it right now, and dismisses Sam's suggestion that they call Mary or Cas. If it doesn't work, he doesn't want to have gotten their hopes up. Sam looks distressed at the idea it won't work, but agrees. The pearl doesn't come with any instructions, so Sam suggests Dean hold it and concentrate on what his heart desires. "Michael out of my head," Dean says, and I'd have been more specific. I'd have concentrated on Michael out of my head and destroyed, and me perfectly fine, but, well, what do I know?

(Also, I KNOW all you Wincest and Destiel fans are gonna have your own ideas about what - or who - appears in front of Dean when he’s granted what his heart desires. This setup is better than sex pollen. Have fun, my kinky little friends.)

Dean clutches the pearl and concentrates, and the lights flash and then go out, and in the red emergency light we see someone in the bunker. Someone fighty, who knocks both brothers down and then pulls out a shotgun and says "don't you move," but it's a familiar voice and then the lights come on and what do you know? Winchester Surprise!

So, was anybody truly surprised? I covered the guest stars on first viewing, as I always try to do, but I noticed on rewatch that they didn't even credit JDM at the beginning of the episode. Which they sometimes do, to avoid spoilers. And yet. Has there been a single episode of this series that was more spoiled? I don't think so.

(Sidebar: What do you think would have happened if Sam had taken the pearl and made a wish? I think Michael would be gone. Because I don't think there's anything Sam wants more than saving his brother.)

Back to our story. Everyone is shocked. John thinks Sam should be in Palo Alto, apparently in his 14th year of post graduate work. He thinks he's still in 2003, and he doesn't notice his boys are older. And they apparently don't notice that his hair is very short and a lot greyer than it was when we last saw him. (I mean, really, they slapped a wig on Samantha Smith to make her look like The Last Version Of Mary, so why couldn't they do the same thing with JDM? It's distracting.) Sam figures they must have accidentally summoned John from the past. So they do what one does in this situation - sit down and drink.

John's astonished. Dean's proud. Sam's visibly anxious. We don't get to see exactly how much of the backstory they tell him, but they do tell him about the apocalypse and Lucifer and living with "an angel and Lucifer's kid." And now John thinks he died "taking out Yellow Eyes," which... not really? But okay. And they don't tell him Mary's back, until he mentions her and Sam's, all, yeah, about Mom, and then she comes in and John hears her voice and tears up and dammit. This reunion is everything I didn't think I ever wanted. I mean, I've made no secret of the fact that I'm not a fan of John Winchester. He's a fascinating character and JDM does a great job with him, but he's such an awful father (don't bother arguing with me, you will not change my mind) that I can't really like him. And I'm not too impressed with resurrected Mary, either. But when these two come together... damn. It's good. It's very good. Well done, you two.

I love that the boys give them some privacy, because it's been over a decade since John saw them, but it's been even longer since he saw his dead wife, and this should really be a John and Mary reunion.

Out in the hall, Dean's gleeful and Sam's all, how the hell did this happen? Dean explains that he's wanted this since he was four years old (oh, my heart) but Sam warns that messing with time will not end well. I don't actually remember Sam being that concerned about the unintended consequences of time travel, but I'm sure there's a good reason he's bringing it up now. Dean doesn't care. Dean just wants one family dinner together (oh, my heart again, remembering his one last dinner with Mary).

Sam, sans Dean, runs into John in the library, because Mary's off making a shopping list and he decided he'd rather examine the bunker than be involved in that I guess? Okay. But then this happens.

I screwed up with you a lot, didn't I?

No, that's okay.

No, it's not. Sammy, tell me the truth.

I don't want to talk about that.

You didn't have a problem talking about it before you left.

Dad. For me, that fight, that was a lifetime ago. I don't even remember what I said. I mean, yeah, you know, you did some messed-up things. But I don't... I mean, when I think about you... and I think about you a lot... I don't think about our fights. I think about you... I think about you on the floor of that hospital, and I think about how I never got to say goodbye.

Sam. Son. I am so sorry.

I'm sorry too. But you did your best, Dad. You fought for us, and you loved us. And that's enough.

OH MY GOD. This is everything I ever wanted.

1. John admitting he was a crap parent to Sam.

2. Sam trying to sidestep that - because he's Sam Winchester and that's what he does - and John not letting him.

3. Sam finally calling him out instead of just saying nah, it's fine.

4. John calling him Sammy.

5. Sam pointing out that he didn't get a goodbye from John. (Did he ever find out that Dean got praise and an apology?)

6. John apologizing.

7. Sam forgiving him.

8. "And I think about you a lot."

9. The way Sam keeps having to stop talking and look away and make that little "hmmm" noise.

10. And the tears.

10b. The way Sam tears up even before The Talk, when he remembers them as kids trying to make Winchester Surprise.

11. The shaky voice.

12. And Sam's shirt.

13. And the way Sam's expression looks so much like his expression in Sacrifice, when he tells Dean that his confession was about how he let his brother down.

This, right here, is two minutes and 24 seconds of the best television I've ever seen. I don't care what else this episode does, this 2:24 is worth it. And yes, this is three weeks in a row that Jared Padalecki has ripped my heart out of my chest and STOMPED ON IT.

And I love it.

Meanwhile, Dean gets the shopping list from Mary. Sam finds him and tells him he's right, because Sam also just got everything he ever wanted, and then offers to go shopping with him. (Saaaaaaaaaaammmmmmmmm!!!!!!!)

When they get to town, the guys split up - Sam to the grocery store, Dean to the liquor store. Dean's surprised to see the liquor store guy, the one who remembered his "usual" earlier in the day, has no idea who he is. If Dean had ever seen "It's a Wonderful Life," he might say this is just like when George Bailey goes into Martini's Bar and isn't recognized. But apparently Dean Winchester, pop culture aficionado, has never seen that movie (no, I haven't gotten over that, and I never will) so he doesn't recognize a classic uh oh, we changed the course of history moment when he experiences it.

Meanwhile, Sam steps out of the grocery store and finds that neither Max nor the postal clerk recognize him. And then he sees a wanted poster in the post office window. Dean Winchester, wanted for assault, murder, and credit card fraud. Whoops! He trots to the car, where Dean is waiting, and tells him they have a problem. "Yeah, we do," says Dean. "Check this out."

He shows Sam his phone and it's a video of SAM IN GLASSES AND A BLACK TURTLENECK AND SLICKED BACK HAIR GIVING A TED TALK. HE RUNS A LAW FIRM AND LOVES KALE. IT IS THE SECOND MOST AMAZING THING I'VE SEEN TONIGHT.

HE'S STEVE JOBS.

So, those of you who were spoiled... did you know about this? Or did they actually keep THIS AMAZING THING under wraps?

Sam Jobs tells his audience that being your best leaves no time for hobbies or a family, and Sam has seen enough. He tells Dean about the wanted poster, and Dean says yes, of course he googled himself too ("a lot of beheadings," hee!!!) and wonders if there are alternate versions of them running around. Sam thinks it's a "temporal paradox," and time is self-correcting, changing to the new one. If they don't fix things, they'll become those alternate versions of themselves. "Well, I'm cool," Dean says, "but you're, ugh." Sam's less worried about them, and more worried about what else might have changed.

(Sidebar: You know, I could quibble about why bringing John forward in time has such a significant butterfly effect, but bringing Mary back, and their other time travel, and Henry's time travel, changed nothing. I absolutely could. But I choose not to, because SAM JOBS, Y'ALL. But okay, let's think about it. 2003 John would have disappeared while Sam was at Stanford. Dean wouldn't have gone to get Sam. Or Sam would have refused to go. Maybe the hurt on both sides was still too fresh. Maybe that's why Dean's hunting alone, and Sam's an internet-famous lawyer.)

What else has changed, you might ask? How about ZACHARIAH? That's right, my favorite angel is back. And with him is ORIGINAL FLAVOR CAS WITH HIS FLUFFY HAIR AND THINGS JUST KEEP GETTING BETTER AND BETTER. Zachariah calls him "Constantine" and Castiel says "I don't understand that reference" and THANK YOU BABY JESUS, I DON'T KNOW WHAT I DID TO DESERVE THIS, BUT THANK YOU. They enter Max's mom's restaurant and ask who's been messing with time. (Because she would know?) And if they don't start talking, he'll have Cas murder all of them. "My name is Castiel," he intones solemnly. "I'm an angel of the Lord." YES YOU ARE. He reveals himself like he did to Dean (no, not like that, jeez) with the shadow wings. Outside, the Winchesters see the bright light of an angelic reveal coming through the restaurant windows, and they know something's up.

They herd everyone out of the restaurant, and are shocked to see Cas and Zachariah. Zachariah is equally surprised to see them. He says they had big plans for the Winchesters, but then their father disappeared and... and he doesn't finish, so we'll never know why yoinking John out of 2003 changed any of that vessel stuff. (Handwave!) Cas, of course, doesn't know them, and when Zachariah orders him to kill them, he complies.

Dean pulls out an angel blade but is, of course, unwilling to actually kill Cas, so he starts hitting him with other things. And Cas, for whatever reason, doesn't just put a finger on his forehead and kill him dead. (Handwave!) Zachariah chokes Sam and asks him what they did, even though he can't talk because he's choking (handwave!) and Sam acts like he's trying to speak so Zachariah gets closer to hear him, and Sam stabs him with an angel blade. Cas continues fistfighting with both of them, and slams Sam head-first into a table a couple of times, leaving him spitting blood on the floor. Which Sam uses to paint an angel-banishing sigil while Cas is choking Dean. Smart Sam for the win!

Bunker. Pretty bruised Dean has explained the temporal paradox, and John accepts that he has to go back, or else Mary will probably disappear. "Okay," he says. "I mean, me versus your mom, that's not even a choice." DAMMIT JOHN WINCHESTER DO NOT MAKE ME CARE ABOUT YOU. Elsewhere, pretty bruised Sam explains it to Mary, and tells her John won't remember anything.

John tells Dean he never meant Dean to have this kind of life. He's proud of him, but he hoped he'd be able to have a normal life, with a family. "I have a family," Dean says. They sit down and have one final family meal together, and everyone's quiet and sad until John points out that they can either think about what's going to happen, or appreciate what they have right now. They cheer up and listen to Bob Seger (well, we listen to Bob Seger) and talk and laugh and have the family dinner Dean has always wanted.

Later, while doing the dishes, Sam says how unfair it is that they all had this and then have to throw it away, and John has to go back to being Dad. He thinks it would be nice for John to go back knowing what he knows now. "I used to think that too," Dean says, and admits that he's blamed both John and Mary for their crappy lives. And if they could send him back to 2003, or even earlier, maybe none of the crap would happen. "But here's the problem. Who does that make us? Would we be better off? Maybe. But I gotta be honest, I don't know who that Dean Winchester is. And I'm good with who I am. I'm good with who you are."

Later. Mary and John are holding hands, and I guess they're doing the thing now. I'd hoped they'd at least let these two have one last roll in the hay (especially since I'm pretty sure Mobby is permanently done after this), but no. They have a very sweet goodbye and their sons are brokenhearted and I am too. John tells his boys to take care of each other and Sam says "we always do." That's a nice change from telling Dean to take care of Sam, isn't it? He tells them both (BOTH) that he's proud of them and loves them, and they have a three-way hug and Sam wipes his eyes and Dean says "love you too" and I REALLY CAN'T, BOYS, YOU HAVE TO STOP. Then John takes Mary's hand again and Sam crushes the pearl (why does Sam have to be the one to do it?) and John glows and then fades away.

We get a quick glimpse of downtown Lebanon returning to normal, and the three teens talking about how cool it is that "those guys hunt monsters," and then we're back to the bunker. Cas walks in the door and sees the remaining Winchesters, obviously distressed, and asks what happened. "Well, there's a story," says Dean.

And finally, we see the Impala WITH HER ORIGINAL KANSAS PLATE. John's asleep in the driver's seat when he gets a phone call from Dean. "No, I'm okay, I just had one hell of a dream. No, it was a good one."

GUYS. GUYS.

When I heard there was going to be a musical episode for the 200th, I was sure it would suck. When I heard about the Scooby Doo crossover, I cringed, because I knew it would be awful. WHY AM I ALWAYS SO WRONG.

Eh, who cares why. Let's just appreciate what we were given. Happy 300, my friends. Here's to 300 more.

(Please help me stay unspoiled for future episodes, thanks!)

#spn #recap #tv recaps #14.13 #things that make my heart hurt #sam winchester #dean winchester #john winchester #mary winchester

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