My page for @destinytriofanzine! I drew something about kids always dreaming of far off places

[id in alt!]

Didn't you hear? He's the elf imagineer!

it's over for me i can't do this

what about labru but with chilchuck watching from the cuck chair

if chilchuck isnt the one being railed then i dont care but i think laios should be in the cuck chair and watch chil and kabru fuck in front of him while crying and jerking off really sadly. and also kabru should be in the cuck chair and watch chilchuck and laios fuck and jerk off in an unsettled yet intrigued way. and actually maybe there isnt a cuck chair but theyre watching through a crack in the wall or something. because i dont really care for cucking but i do like nonconsensual voyeurism. actually. they can both do that. i think chil should take a bath on his visit to the castle and there are two peepholes and laios and kabru have no idea about the other person but theyre both jorking it on opposite ends of the room while chil is undressing. i think one little guy can have two people have a weird psychosexual obsession with him…..lots of stuff to think about. what was this ask about again

Cleaning out my art desk and I found what I believe is a draft for a bigger project, with notes at the bottom for what it was about. Except it kinda just reads as its own poem

[ID: A picture of a sketch on a piece of paper. A heart shape in red pen made to look like bloody guts surrounds a graphite pencil drawing of a scribbled, vaguely canine animal. The drawing is captioned "Do you need a little love, little animal" in red pen. Beneath the drawing is a note written in pencil, which reads "the animal is like a wolf-fox-raccoon made of barbed wire and graphite scribbles. it is somewhere around my solar plexus. it is rooting around in my guts. it yells a lot. the quote is from my mother"]

Ok I got a weird message and I just wanna say:

You are allowed to disagree with me. I love it when people disagree with me. Please do - please write 6000 words disagreeing with me. I will pour over all of them, even if I don't always want to respond. (though I probably will because I like interesting discussion) You don't need to apologize for disagreeing with me. I'm not going to get mad at anyone who disagrees with me. I do not hold fictional characters and worlds at a higher importance than real peoples' thoughts and feelings. I like your ideas even if I think they are boring and inaccurate. Unconditionally. Because you are a person and you are engaging with fiction wholeheartedly, just like I do.

We are more alike then we are different. Maybe I come across as intense sometimes, but im just excitable and passionate.

I'm very "make oblique commentary on YouTube" mood...

Not going to put in usernames or whatever - because I don't think it's productive to my pt here.

OP comment was this (on a reality TV show with a moment where there was some ableism from the judges of this nature to a colorblind MUA):

And someone wrote this in response:

And oh man. This is very Business Major attitude about what's ultimately a creative exercise. Art will ALWAYS be subjective, a marketing dept can't know what's going to resonate with everyone. Hell, bad marketing of art is a thing - giving you expectations of one thing where it just doesn't make sense to. (Looking at you, Marketing for "Jennifer's Body".)

When it comes to individual and deeply personal experiences like disability? Fuckign- who cares if it isn't legible to people who don't have that disability, man. Trying to sand down that shit to appeal to abled folks kills any sense of authenticity here - and it will never please everyone anyways!

I explained the plot wall sticky notes to my brother and he said '........wouldn't it be easier to just write something original?' and I was like '😐 that's not the POINT'

this guy's videos are sooooo ren-core it hurts omg. i don't even have much to say, i'm just Obsessed. i can't stop watching bc his energy is so fun. kicking my feet in the air and going "teehee" hghghghhghg.

[vids of a guy foraging, so general cw for fungus / mushrooms and a trypophobia warning for the gills and pores. more specific warnings with each vid.]

↓↓ [cw he slices some milk caps to make them "bleed" at 4:53-6:37 and 9:15-9:53. the liquid is white, but some of the slicing evokes some imagery to me. just warning to be safe.]

↓↓ [cw mushroom w maggots in it from 1:40 to 1:56.]

ren would absolutely make a "this is what good ___ sounds like" joke at 2:50 tho kjfnkjdnf. also "these little slimy boys" im crying. yearning. need someone with this kind of energy so badly.

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The Billions Showrunners Go To See Bway Bmc like lgw "the problem has always been me" and they look at each other approvingly and nod like now he's getting it :) and then the squip's deactivated and everyone's embracing the realities of being a person and rejecting the idea there can be, should be, and is a set of standards to meet to get everything you want and preclude yourself from being mistreated and they're like nooo what a powerful tragedy :(

So one of the most interesting things about the TLOU character changes (or character reveals?) that people are just.... completely overlooking are the fact that Tommy is a liar. Now granted, neither brother is a completely trustworthy narrator... sort of. But I’d like people to consider something: Joel doesn’t generally lie to Ellie, or anyone else, about the big things. He could have lied, told her he never killed “innocent” people, but he didn’t. Sure, he couldn’t say the word “yes,” but neither could he say “no,” and that silence spoke volumes. He knows, better than anyone (and is honestly over-blowing it a little bit) how much of an asshole he is.

So when he goes on to explain that Tommy routinely joins and drops causes, and that it was Tommy’s idea to join the raider crew they were on... while his opinion of Tommy is obviously coloured by his own biases, I fully believe this. Joel isn’t a joiner. He’s as anti-joiner as you can get, and he always was. Consider the first episode. He says straight up--in front of Sarah, no less--that he will absolutely not hire any outside people for a job even if it would be beneficial, and that he barely wants to share the work with Tommy. Later, while he encourages Sarah to interact with their neighbors, he balks at doing so himself. He’s not terribly social, never has been, and it’s difficult to see him willingly joining up with a group for any reason...

But Tommy does so. Routinely. He was in the army, he goes out to bars (where he white knights for others to the point of getting himself arrested routinely, by the way their phone conversation went--though this could also point out that Tommy does have a bit of a violent temper at times) And I firmly believe it was Tommy’s idea to go Raider.

Joel might flinch at admitting these things, but he does admit to them and he doesn’t give himself much quarter. He says it was Tommy’s idea and fault that they got sucked into it, but Joel fully takes responsibility for the things he did while in the group.

Meanwhile, there’s the conversation between Maria and Ellie. Maria is fully convinced that Tommy never, ever liked the things he did while he was with Joel, and that everything that happened back then was exclusively Joel’s fault--Tommy was just a bystander at best, or a hapless idiot at worst.  Granted, this could be Maria justifying Tommy because she loves him, but it also reeks of Tommy having told her a version of events which paints him has having less responsibility for his and Joel’s shared past.

Similarly, when Tommy and Joel discuss it, Joel doesn’t quite take full responsibility for everything between them--he directly mentions “all those things you blame me for,” which speaks more to Tommy’s continued denial that he wanted anything to do with what happened--but Tommy spends the entire conversation assuming the absolute worst about Joel. You can look at this as evidence that Joel changed, went to some really dark places during that point in time... and I wouldn’t argue with you. He absolutely did, and he admits it.

The thing is, so did Tommy. But Tommy is insistent that it was all Joel’s “fault,” as though Joel made him do these things. That’s who Tommy is, though. Tommy doesn’t take responsibility. He boasts, and talks a lot of shit, and balks at reality when he doesn’t want to admit the truth (for another example, the “we’re not communists!” knee-jerk reaction before Maria herself is like “uh, yeah, babe, we are.”,) and he does intensely fucked up and insensitive things like not checking in with Joel to let him know he’s alright even though he knows what his brother is like. I don’t believe, for a second, that Tommy didn’t know Joel was going to show up. He sure as shit knew enough to warn Maria to look out for Joel coming--that’s why she already suspected who he was when they were first surrounding him and Ellie at the border. They knew Joel was likely to show up... and Tommy still didn’t find a way to warn him, or even tell him that he was okay.

All of this is to say, Tommy is just as much of an asshole as Joel is. Hell, I’d argue he’s an even bigger asshole, because unlike his brother, he isn’t honest about his rough edges. He does everything in his power to hide them.

ETA: Gonna leave the original text as above, but after rewatching the scene with them in the bar, I will say: Tommy does admit that he murdered people--but I still find it interesting that he does so ONLY when in private with Joel. His admission that he did those things doesn’t jive with the things Maria says to Ellie, and I feel that there’s a reason for that.

considering that the girl with the blue flower is always referred to as just that-- a girl (never woman or young woman), and the artist once refers to her as "a girl that young", AND she's meant to resemble the sister in her youth, those theories and interpretations that the artist fell in love with her make me very uncomfortable

I finally saw the Barbie movie! I have. Thoughts.

All desire for gentleness goes out the window I guarantee it

current mood: